(WOAH Another chapter I really like… I hope you'll enjoy it too.. I sat for ages writing it and now I have a pounding headache, so I'm posting and getting off this addicting box (the computer) Take Care everyone... thanx so much for all your wonderful reviews!)
CHAPTER 12
Harry had no idea how much time had passed, all he knew is that he wasn't about to leave her alone, and that he would give her all the comfort, support and time she needed to heal.
Carefully, he gathered Hermione's limp, drained body in his arms and carried her to her bed where he gently set her down. She wasn't responsive, and was staring into oblivion; her eyes glossy and trance like. She was still trembling, she was still drenched in cold sweat and she was still running a high fever.
Harry lay down right beside her, curling a loose arm around her stomach and burrowing his face into her cinnamon curls. He felt the knot in his throat tighten as fear swept over him and a tear left his now pale green eyes, would she be okay? What should he do about her fever? He knew it wouldn't be a good idea to bring up Madam Pomfrey to Hermione in such a state; he needed to help her on his own, but how? He didn't have the heart to leave her side.
He felt Hermione relax, and a peaceful sigh escaped her lips; she had fallen asleep.
Harry lay next to her for a moment longer before he cautiously slid off the bed, gave her a soft gentle kiss on the cheek and looked around for a blank piece of parchment or paper.
It wasn't long before he gathered what he needed to write Hermione a quick note.
I'll be back soon, I promise… I needed to get some things -Harry-
Harry quietly shuffled towards the door to Hermione's room, careful not to step on anything littering the stone floor. Slowly he turned the door knob and gritted his teeth as the door squeaked open. He paused for a moment to hear if Hermione had stirred, but he heard nothing.
Closing the door behind him he heard steps coming up the stairs.
"Harry?"
He turned around to find Ron staring back at him, eyes wide and a grim expression written on his face.
"Is she… how is she?" He mumbled awkwardly.
Harry ran a hand through his messy dark hair and sighed.
"Not so good." Harry answered under his breath.
"I read the newspaper," Ron started slowly.
"I know."
"Can I see her?" Ron asked shifting his feet.
Harry shook his head. "I don't think it would be a good idea… not right now." He said feeling guilty for his answer.
"I understand… is there anything I can do?"
"I need to get her some food, she hasn't eaten anything, she's going to need it… she's weak."
Ron looked really upset. Harry knew Ron was feeing the exact same way he was; it hurt them both knowing Hermione had to experience such a tragic incident.
"I'll come with you to the kitchens, we can get Dobby to fix her something to eat." Ron stated.
Harry put a hand on Ron's shoulder.
"Thanks mate." Harry sighed.
"Anything for my best friends… I wish I could do more."
"She'll need all our support soon, she's just… not herself." Harry said softly.
Ron nodded and they both set off towards the kitchens.
"I'll also need a basin with cold water and a towel."
"What for?" Ron questioned.
"She's running a fever I think."
"Maybe we should get Madam Pomfrey?" Ron asked as they reached the enormous painting of a bowl of fruit.
"I thought about it, and I know I probably should… but I don't think it would be a good idea." Harry answered tickling the large pear.
It giggled and turned into a door handle.
"Harry Potter… Harry Potter has come to visit Dobby, Dobby has missed Harry Potter sir." Dobby said dancing before Harry and Ron, his large tennis ball sized eyes bulged with excitement.
Harry's stomach gave an unpleasantly lurch and he felt really guilty.
"Dobby, I'm sorry for not coming to see you yet this year, it's just been a really crazy year so far." Harry explained truthfully.
"Dobby is not angry with Harry Potter sir, not angry at all… he is knowing that Harry Potter is being very busy at Hogwarts sir."
Harry gave him a very slight grin, he felt a little better knowing Dobby understood.
"Harry Potter is looking very sad, what can Dobby do for Harry Potter?"
"We need a good supply of food for Hermione, she hasn't had any breakfast, and I don't think she'll be coming down for dinner either." Ron said glumly.
Harry nodded.
"Miss Hermione? … she is needing to eat her meals, she should not be skipping dinner time Harry Potter sir."
Harry sighed. He wasn't quite ready to tell anyone what Hermione was going through, he suspected Hermione wouldn't want others to know either, but the look of complete trust, and friendship in Dobby's eye's made Harry's heart sink a few inches.
"Hermione… her mum," Harry felt the knot return to his throat, he just couldn't say it.
"Died." Ron finished.
Dobby's large eyes widened and they glossed over, his lip quivered before Dobby burst into tears, blowing his nose on his clothes.
"Oh poor Miss Hermione… she is not deserving such sadness, Dobby is making Miss Hermione a special meal, he is making her something to make Miss Hermione feel nice."
Harry and Ron waited as Dobby sprinted around the kitchens cooking up a fierce storm.
Eventually he bounced towards both the boys with an enormous basket full of food.
"Thank you Dobby."
"It is Dobby's pleasure Harry Potter sir… If you is getting any chance, bring Miss Hermione to the kitchens, I have a gift for Harry Potter's special girl."
Harry felt himself blush.
"I'll come visit you on Christmas Dobby, I'm staying at the school with Luna and Harry." Ron said casually.
"Oh Dobby would be delighted to see Harry Potter's Wheezy again, he is be very happy to see Harry Potter and his friends any time."
"I need one more thing Dobby." Harry stated.
"Anything for Harry Potter sir." Dobby answered with a large grin.
"I need a basin with cold water and a towel."
Dobby looked slightly confused but went to look for what Harry asked. He came back quickly with a large basin, a jug of cold water and a small face cloth.
"Thanks for everything Dobby, I don't know how to thank you." Harry said as he and Ron made their way to the large painting.
"You already has sir." Dobby grinned.
******
Harry thanked Ron for his help near the door to Hermione's room, and apologized again that he couldn't let Ron see her just yet.
"Don't worry about it mate." Ron had said. "Just make sure you let me know how she's doing and when she's ready to see some people, I want to see her."
Harry agreed and entered Hermione's room. As he reached her bed, he was relieved to see Hermione was still asleep. He took the wooden chair that lay on its side beside the shattered human sized mirror, and moved it quietly next to Hermione's bed. There, he placed the basin on her bedside table and poured the cold water from the jug into the large glass basin. He then allowed the cloth to soak in the cold water for a moment, before wringing the face cloth of excess water, and then he carefully dabbed at her hot skin.
If only he had taken Healer classes like Hermione had chosen, he would just wave his wand, mutter a spell and her fever would probably be gone.
Harry allowed the cool towel to rest on her forehead. Reluctantly, he lifted himself from the wooden chair, and took out his wand. With many flicks, swishes, and chosen words, Harry efficiently cleaned up Hermione's room. He replaced the glass in the shattered human sized mirror, and repaired the parchment Hermione had torn into tiny shreds. Carefully, he folded Hermione's letters across their original creases and stored them in his robes; he had a feeling he might need them later.
Harry returned to his chair beside Hermione's bed, re rinsed the face cloth in the basin, wrung it out and placed it gently back on her forehead.
Harry couldn't help but admire how captivating she looked curled up, sleeping soundly, without a single care in the world. He was more then grateful she was most likely having a dreamless sleep; she desperately needed a good rest, and an escape from her pain.
The late evening rays illuminated her natural beauty. He stared at her long dark eyelashes that always seemed to bring out the cinnamon in her chocolate brown eyes, he slowly glanced at her creamy, smooth skin that was soft as silk to the touch, and her luscious full lips that always contained that sweet, never fading smile.
Her eyes fluttered open. She wasn't surprised to find Harry peering into her sad eyes, in fact, no expression covered her face. She just blinked, and continued to stare into his bright emerald green eyes.
Harry gave her a slight lopsided grin, and caressed her cheek with his thumb. After a few moments, she watched him leave the wooden chair before her, and lift a large basket into his strong arms. He settled himself on the bed next to her and placed the basket beside him.
She heaved herself from her pillow and fell back gently against Harry's chest. His steady heartbeat gave her a feeling of warmth and tranquility. He wrapped his arms around her and kissed the side of her head.
"You have to eat something, okay?" He whispered softly.
She shook her head.
"Please." He said reaching a hand into the basket and pulling out a container with sliced apple pieces.
She shook her head again.
"Hermione, you have to eat something… I'm worried about you."
She paused for a moment before reaching a tired hand into the container for a slice of apple.
"Good… you need your strength."
She ate a fair portion of the enormous meal Dobby had prepared; Harry too had some things from the basket.
"How do you do it?" Hermione murmured after a long silence.
Her sudden words slightly startled him. She had spoken so softly, he had barely heard her.
"Do what?" Harry asked gently stroking her hair.
"Escape the pain." She choked.
Harry wiped the tear that drifted down her cheek.
He took a deep breath and thought about her question for a moment.
"It's not easy to… to just escape…but the closest I've been to that carefree freedom, is when I fly." He answered truthfully.
Harry suspected she was thinking back to their third year when he and Hermione had flown together on Buckbeak.
"You should try flying on a broom one day… I didn't much like flying on a Hippogriff." Harry said with a bit of a chuckle.
"Can we?"
Harry didn't quite know what she was asking.
"Can we go now?" She tried again when Harry took too much time answering her previous question.
"You want to go flying with me?" Harry questioned with shock in his tone.
He felt her nod.
"Hermione… you have a fever."
"I'll clear it up, I know the spell."
"I still don't think it's a good idea,"
"Please." Her eyes begged for his approval. "I need this."
Harry sighed.
"Okay Hermione, but you have to dress warmly… and just for a little while."
"You're starting to sound like me." She teased poking his side with her finger.
Harry's heart gave a double leap when he saw the familiar grin spread across her face. Maybe, this wasn't such a bad idea after all.
After Hermione made her fever disappear, when Harry made sure Hermione had bundled herself up from head to toe, and when Hermione made sure Harry too was dressed warmly, they both made their way through the castle doors to the frosty outdoors.
"Accio broom." Harry muttered concentrating on his Firebolt back in the Boys Dormitory.
Harry saw it zoom across the evening sky and came to rest at a hover just before himself and Hermione.
"Are you ready?" Harry asked mounting the broom and giving Hermione room to sit down right before him.
She took a deep breath.
"I think so." She answered.
Harry expected Hermione to sit down on the broom with her back to him, but instead, she chose to sit facing Harry. She put her legs over Harry's thighs, she wrapped her arms around him, and rested her head on his shoulder.
"Okay?" Harry asked.
"Okay." She answered.
As Harry kicked off from the ground, Hermione wriggled closer and held on a little tighter. Harry felt the blood rush to the lower portion of his body.
`Thank Merlin its so bloody cold today.' Harry thought ushering his broom in a slow forward motion.
"You okay Mione?"
"Yeah." Harry felt her nod.
"Look at this sunset, isn't it amazing?"
The sky was draped in gentle pinks, baby blues, a wisp of distinct violet, a rich orange, and a brilliant yellow.
Harry let the icy air fill his lungs with a deep breath, and allowed the nearly non existent breeze run through his messy hair.
He felt Hermione loosen the grip as the colors mesmerized her, and the sense of freedom began to flow through her delicate body.
"Oh Harry this feels so good."
Harry felt her warm breath tickle the side of his neck as she spoke; it sent pulsing, exhilarating chills through him. If only she knew just what she did to him, how quickly he melted from her soft touch.
Harry floated gently back down towards the ground.
"That's it?" Hermione asked with a hint of disappointment in her tone.
Harry smiled to himself, she was enjoying it.
"No… but I want you to try."
"Try what?" She asked lifting her head from his shoulder and holding his attention with her eyes.
"Flying." He answered.
"I just did." She said looking slightly confused.
"No… it's your turn to steer the Firebolt while I hold on for the ride."
"Harry,"
"It'll make you feel good… I won't let anything happen to you, I promise." He said giving her a soft grin.
"Okay." She said slowly turning around to face the front of the broom.
Harry wrapped his arms around her waist and gave her time to feel ready.
She pushed off from the ground allowing the Firebolt to slowly drift upwards.
"Don't be afraid Hermione… just ride whatever you feel inside." He whispered.
Her grip on the handle tightened and her face fell into one of concentration.
Before Harry could mutter more words of encouragement Hermione had thrown herself forward against the Firebolt into a steep dive towards the ground.
Harry's jaw dropped, the whistling in his ears became louder and louder as they pelted towards the hard group gaining speed with each moment. Harry fought the urge to put his hands on the handle and bring the broom to a halt, but his trust in Hermione stopped him.
The icy, snow covered surface was just feet before them.
`Pull up Hermione, pull up.'
They were now just inches away from colliding with the ground.
`Come on, Come on!' Harry screamed in his mind.
Then just as Harry closed his eyes, preparing for a fatal impact, Hermione pulled up from a nose dive only Harry would have risked performing.
Harry felt Hermione breathing rapidly as they shot towards the painted sky, she then leveled the broom and slowed the Firebolt.
For a moment they were both silent.
"Why didn't you stop me?" She asked breathless.
"I trust you." He said softly burrowing his face into her spicy hair.
Harry felt her shaking.
"I was just so angry." She choked.
"I know." He said softly. "Do you want me to take us back down?"
"I could do it." She murmured holding back tears.
"Okay."
Hermione glided towards the entrance to the castle. She allowed herself to get lost in her own thoughts, and Harry didn't interrupt.
Hermione made a fairly rough landing, but it was still pretty good for someone who had little experience with flying brooms.
"Thank you Harry." She whispered falling into his embrace.
"Its nothing compared to what you've done for me." Harry said truthfully rubbing her back gently.
"Don't say that… you've done for me, as much as I've done for you."
Harry chose not to argue, but didn't agree. Hermione had always been there for him, he hadn't always been fair, and had taken her for granted on many occasions.
"I'm sorry Hermione." He said softly.
"Sorry for what?" She asked furrowing her eyebrows.
"For everything... for dragging you into so much danger, and… and… for your mum." Harry felt his stomach twist into knots.
She pushed away from him, her face full of anger.
"Don't you dare blame yourself for this." She hissed.
"How can I not?... if you hadn't known me,"
"I don't want to hear it, you understand?... I chose to be your friend, I chose to go along with you knowing well that I was heading in the direction of danger!"
Harry hadn't seen Hermione this upset in a long while, he didn't quite know what to say, but her words hadn't lifted the guilt that continued to twist unpleasantly.
"Harry listen to me… you did nothing wrong… If I hadn't been your friend I still would have heard a noise and gone down into the dungeons, except, if you hadn't gone after me, Lucius might have killed me… Harry look at me." She waited until Harry's eyes met hers. "You need to stop blaming yourself for everything."
Harry nodded and weaved his fingers into Hermione's.
The castle was quiet and deserted, everyone had probably gone to their Common Rooms and perhaps even to bed.
"Are you staying with me?" Hermione asked as they reached the Head Girl's room.
"If you want me to." He said softly, hoping she would.
"Yes I do, but only if you really want to stay."
Harry grinned and turned the door handle to her room.
"After you."
Hermione gave him a slight smile and her eyes danced with relief.
While Hermione had gone to the bathroom to change and brush her teeth, Harry lit a blazing fire in her large personal fireplace and inched the loveseat closer so the dancing flames. He then conjured two mugs of butterbeer and placed the food basket near the loveseat.
Hermione came out of the bathroom wearing a soft pink, silk nightdress; she looked refreshed and ready to curl up by the warmth of the fire. She couldn't help but feel slightly flustered when she saw Harry holding up two mugs of butterbeer, wearing nothing but plaid pajama pants.
He had strong arms and shoulders, a well defined chest and upper abdomen, his messy black hair fell uncontrollably in all directions, a few strands falling over his bright green eyes, and his adorable lopsided grin made her heart flutter a million miles a minute.
"Oh Merlin." Hermione muttered not meaning to say it out loud.
"Come on over by the fire, it'll warm you up." He said.
Hermione slowly walked towards Harry, and wrapped her chilled hands around the warm mug of amber liquid.
Harry settled himself on the loveseat and patted the spot next to him for her to lie down next to him.
For a moment she just stood there admiring Harry, the boy-who-lived, who was now very much a man. She blushed when she realized how much time she had taken to study him.
He patted the seat again and stretched his arm out for her head to rest on. She gave him a grin and settled herself next to him, taking a quick sip of butterbeer.
"You were right." She said quietly.
"Hmm?" He questioned stroking her soft hand with his thumb.
"Flying does give you a sort of escape."
"You liked it?"
He felt her nod.
"Good, maybe we can do that again sometime… but this time I'll do the steering." Harry joked with a laugh.
"Oh don't tell me you were scared?" She asked in amusement.
"Perhaps, a little… you would have made a great seeker you know."
"I was never into sports though, remember?" She said matter-of-factly.
"Yeah… I don't know why you always watched."
"You hadn't figured that one out yet?" She questioned with a laugh, but a blush also covered her cheeks.
Harry shook his head.
"Because you were playing silly." She gave him a playful shove with her fingertips.
Harry thought about it for a moment, and realized Hermione had stopped going to Quidditch games as soon as Harry stopped playing them, even though Ron continued to play keeper on the Gryffindor team.
He gave Hermione a loving grin and kissed her forehead.
"Harry can I ask you something… personal?"
"Anything."
She looked uncomfortable and hesitated to ask her question.
"Its okay Mione, go on, ask me."
"Well… it's about your mum, your nightmares."
Harry nodded to show he was okay with discussing the topic.
"What... what do you see?"
"Just my mum standing in a room facing Voldemort asking him to kill her instead of me... Voldemort didn't want her murdered, he asked her to stand aside so he could perform the curse, but she wouldn't, so he killed her too… she screamed my name before she died." He recalled painfully. "But… I think it was harder loosing Sirius, I knew him, and I saw it happen right before me."
Hermione nodded slowly and squeezed his hand to show she understood and felt his pain.
"I've always been really close with my mum," Hermione choked, withholding tears that were pleading to fall again. "She was so excited that I had this chance to be a student in the magical world… she told me, when she was little, she would read a lot of books about magic and fantasize about it being real." She took a deep breath. "I didn't have friends before Hogwarts, so she became my best friend… my dad too, but I was never as close to him as I was to my mum."
Harry nodded showing he understood.
"Harry?"
"Mmm?"
"Come home with me for Christmas holidays tomorrow?"
Harry moved his position on the loveseat to look into Hermione's eyes.
"What?" He asked as if he hadn't quite heard what she had said.
"I said I want you to come home with me for,"
"I know, but Hermione,"
"I don't want to go alone… I can't."
He saw her eyes gloss as she struggled to hold back the tears once again.
Harry caressed her face and searched her deep brown eyes.
"But… don't you think… you and your dad," Harry tried.
"He'll understand Harry." She paused for a moment before whispering, "I need you."
Harry felt something pull at his heart. The knot in his throat wouldn't allow him to answer, so he nodded.
She snaked her arms around his neck as he hovered just above her face.
He felt her holding her breath in anticipation. Her eyes filled with passion, and a great deal of desire, they enticed him with a burning appetite.
He kissed her gently and she quickly opened her mouth up to welcome him inside, he deepened the kiss and she moaned with pleasure.
Her eagerness quickly excited him. He kissed her even deeper and ran a hand along her slender curve.
"Mmm." She moaned again before Harry gently pulled away from her lips.
He grinned, giving her another quick kiss on her now swollen lips.
Harry settled himself next to her again, wrapped his arms around her. Their rapid breathing soon slowed and they both fell asleep, completely in love.
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