I Wanna Know What Love Is
By: H_HrFan
I gotta take a little time
A little time to think things over
I better read between the lines
In case I need it when I'm older
Now this mountain I must climb
Feels like a world upon my shoulders
I through the clouds I see love shine
It keeps me warm as life grows colder
In my life there's been heartache and pain
I don't know if I can face it again
Can't stop now, I've traveled so far
To change this lonely life
I wanna know what love is
I want you to show me
I wanna feel what love is
I know you can show me
I'm gonna take a little time
A little time to look around me
I've got nowhere left to hide
It looks like love has finally found me
In my life there's been heartache and pain
I don't know if I can face it again
I can't stop now, I've traveled so far
To change this lonely life
I wanna know what love is
I want you to show me
I wanna feel what love is
I know you can show me
I wanna know what love is
I want you to show me
And I wanna feel, I want to feel what love is
And I know, I know you can show me
Let's talk about love
I wanna know what love is, the love that you feel inside
I want you to show me, and I'm feeling so much love
I wanna feel what love is, no, you just cannot hide
I know you can show me, yeah
I wanna know what love is, let's talk about love
I want you to show me, I wanna feel it too
I wanna feel what love is, I want to feel it too
And I know and I know, I know you can show me
Show me love is real, yeah
I wanna know what love is...
~~~~Foreigner~~~~
I gotta take a little time
A little time to think things over
I better read between the lines
In case I need it when I'm older
~Harry~
He could remember it all clearly. It happened the very first time he saw her. At first he assumed that little jolt in his stomach was due to the fact that a girl (a pretty girl at that) had finally talked to him. Throughout his early years he was always alone. Girls and boys alike were always too scared to approach him. Occasionally, when it would appear as though someone wanted to talk to him they would get a look like they'd just had a terrifying thought, and they'd hurry away. Thanks to the threat of Dudley and his gang everyone was too scared to give young Harry Potter the time of day.
Until her…
There he was sitting on the train with Ron, the boy who would become his best friend, laughing and eating piles of candy he hadn't ever heard of …when she walked in. "Has anyone seen a toad? A boy named Neville has lost one." Those were her first words. All he could do was stare at her. He knew she wasn't talking just to him at that moment, but when she actually moved toward him he knew he was lost. Eleven years old with a major crush on practically the first girl he'd seen! She didn't seem to mind his tattered clothes (which were at least four sizes too big), or his broken glasses, or his messy hair…. Nope, she didn't seem to mind anything about him. Not only that…she wasn't worried about Dudley! That was one of things he immediately loved about Hermione; she was fearless, he could see it in her eyes. As their years as friends passed, he knew that she would have never been scared of Dudley. He knew, instinctively, that she was meant to be a part of his life and that no one could have kept her away from him.
He remembered wondering briefly what Dudley would do if he knew that already five kids had spoken to him and not one of them had seemed the least bit scared. In fact, everyone he'd met appeared to be in awe of him. Now, looking back he thought it rather amusing; then, it was quite terrifying. Everyone knew more about him than he knew about himself and that was a frightening thing for a boy who, up until that point, had grown up feeling nearly non-existent. Harry had to laugh now. Dudley had friends because they were too scared of him to not be his friend. If they were in Dudley's inner circle, they were guaranteed protection. Given enough thought, he could almost feel sorry for him. Dudley would never know the true meaning of friendship and the pure joy that can come from it.
Hermione sat down across from him that day on the train and cast a spell to repair his glasses. All the while completely unaware that while her intentions were innocent, she had unknowingly cast a spell on his heart.
There were so many times over the last few years that Harry felt certain he wasn't worthy of Hermione or her friendship, much less her love. When she had his new broom confiscated during third year, he was so angry he thought he'd never forgive her. It couldn't last though. After a short time, he practically begged her to forgive him…he could never stay angry for long. In fourth year when he was forced to take place in the Tri-Wizard Tournament Hermione stood by him and focused all of her time and energy into helping him stay alive. Winning was not something he expected to happen…although 'winning' is hardly the term one could use for reaching the cup first! It was, after all, the reason that Cedric died. She was there for him then, too. Even when he had a hard time talking to her afterward. He yelled at her way too much during their fifth year and still she wouldn't go away. Not that he wanted her to, but she wouldn't! Until her, no one in his life had ever stuck with him through thick and thin or good and bad…not even Ron.
He needed her. He'd come to depend on her. He couldn't make it without her. He loved her with every fiber of his being.
How in the world was he going to tell her?
~Hermione~
Hermione liked to imagine that her life began when she boarded the train to Hogwarts. She didn't know why she'd gone looking for Neville's toad. Sure she wanted to help him, but she'd been reading 'Hogwarts: A History' and she really didn't want to put it down just to search for a lost toad. Something stirred within her however, and she left her seat and headed directly for the car where he was sitting. Of course, she hadn't known he'd be there. She was just going where, she supposed now, her heart had led her.
She remembered walking oh-so-casually toward the door of the car and seeing the two boys who would someday become her very best friends. She found them laughing, with a large pile of candy separating them on the seat. Both were cute, but the one with the dark hair sent shockwaves throughout her body. It wasn't a sexual feeling, just a series of zaps…like static electricity. She asked about the toad and somehow remembered that it was a boy named Neville who'd lost it. It was just after that, that she'd noticed the red-haired boy preparing to do a magic spell. When he failed to turn his rat yellow, she knew this would be her moment to make an impression. She walked straight to the raven haired boy and cast a spell to repair his glasses. One look into his beautiful green eyes and she knew she'd never be the same again. She knew that she would do anything for him…even die if she had to. That was before she even knew he was Harry Potter, The-Boy-Who-Lived.
Throughout the years, she'd become dependent upon taking care of Harry. She needed it. When she couldn't be there with him, she craved it. She simply had no real life away from him. Her entire world revolved around him. Even before the incident with the troll, before they'd become real friends, she couldn't resist the urge to help him. Once she'd met him, she'd taken it upon herself to read everything she could find about him. She looked in the library for information about his parents, Voldemort, scars, and absolutely everything else she could think of. She knew that someday she'd need to be ready to help him in his ultimate battle; she was determined to leave nothing out.
She wanted so much more from him. She wanted to be with him. She wanted a life with him. She loved him more than she'd ever thought imaginable. She was incomplete without him.
How would she ever find the words to tell him?
Now this mountain I must climb
Feels like a world upon my shoulders
I through the clouds I see love shine
It keeps me warm as life grows colder
~Harry~
Harry had never truly belonged to himself. Voldemort had a piece of him, the wizarding world had a piece of him, and Hermione had the most important piece of him…his heart. When Dumbledore told him about the prophecy he honestly believed that it meant he'd have to deal with everything on his own. In his heart though, he knew that he couldn't do it without her and truth be told…he really didn't want to.
She had been with him through it all. Encouraging him, teaching him, giving him everything she had to give. He knew that sometimes he'd taken her for granted. Sometimes he'd been angry with her for things she had done that were really for his own good. Never could he remember a time when she wasn't there for him. Not even when she was angry with him. She could always put that emotion aside to give him what he needed.
His shoulders were often weighted down by the magnitude of his destiny; sometimes to the point where thought he'd just fall. He carried the fate of thousands who really wanted nothing more than the chance to live. The freedom to choose the type of life they led lay solely in their own hands but they looked to him as though he was their savior. He was the only one who could eliminate the darkness and bring back the light. The more time he spent thinking about it, the more dramatic it sounded to him so he often had to force himself to stop. He didn't like to think of himself as a savior and it nearly killed him to think of what happened to the last Savior. That was not a fate he wanted to share. He desperately wanted the chance to live when his destiny was fulfilled…he wanted to live for her.
Since so much a part of him was wrapped up in her, he occasionally liked to imagine that she could share just a small part of his burden. Rationally, he knew that he would never really want to put her in that kind of danger, but when irrational thoughts clouded his mind, he wanted to borrow from her strength and share his responsibility. He could see her standing there beside him triumphant against the greatest dark lord to ever live.
He would make it…he had to. If he didn't he could only selfishly hope that they would immediately meet in heaven and he'd never have to be alone again…he'd never have to be without her. Having her there was what kept him going. Knowing he would see her as soon as he entered the common room was what got him out of bed in the morning and knowing she'd be there as long as he was in the evening was what kept him up late at night.
He watched her often enough to know that she had smiles, expressions, and mannerisms that were reserved for him. He liked to think it was because she felt the same way he did. Her smile often chased away the darkness and left him shrouded in a bright, dazzling light that warmed him to his very core.
If she could do that with a smile…he was sure he'd melt with the heat of her kiss. Melting was something he was looking forward to!
~Hermione~
Hermione watched Harry closely. She sometimes felt as though she knew him better than anyone else…better even then he knew himself. She knew when he was happy, sad, contemplative, worried, scared, and especially angry. What she didn't know was where his heart was…or if there would ever be a time that he would trust her with it.
She wanted to share his pain. She wanted to take away some, if not all, of his stress and anxiety. She wanted to take his place in the battle against Voldemort. Most of all, she wanted to take away the night terrors so he could sleep. On countless occasions she'd heard him say that he'd give anything to just sleep. She didn't understand how he could still be standing, much less how he could function. He slept so little and worried so much that she would find herself standing close to him on the off chance that it would all catch up to him and he would simply fall over…she wanted to be the one to catch him when/if that ever happened.
All she could do was watch him and let him know, in subtle ways, that she would be there for him no matter what he needed her for. She wanted to be the light at the end of the long, dark tunnel.
In my life there's been heartache and pain
I don't know if I can face it again
Can't stop now, I've traveled so far
To change this lonely life
Harry had lost so much in his young life: his parents, his godfather, his individuality, his freedom, and most notably; his anonymity. He decided long ago that Voldemort would have to pay for all of the pain he had caused. However, even through his anger he couldn't help but be a little thankful to him as well (although that one he'd never admit to anybody…except perhaps Hermione; when the time was right). It was like a double-edged sword. If Voldemort hadn't marked him, his parents would still be alive. On the other hand, if Voldemort hadn't killed his parents would he 'have' Hermione? Would she have even taken the time to talk to him? He was sure that he wasn't worthy of her and that if circumstances had been different, she would have gone right past him without noticing he was there. Although he was certain that in his current life she would have been with him no matter what, he couldn't stop himself from doubting that she would be with him in another. How much happiness is any one person entitled to? Having his parents and Hermione would be more than he'd ever be allowed…he needed to be thankful for what he had.
Afternoons and early evenings were his time. At night, when he tried to sleep, the dreams did not belong to him. At night he oftentimes found it hard to completely clear his mind and the night terrors would take over and make him nearly unwilling to fall sleep at all. But now…during the day…the dreams belonged only to him. Since he had finally learned the basics of Occlumency he was able to quickly clear his mind if he felt the slightest intrusion into his daydreams. It wasn't often that he was interrupted, so he was generally able to take full advantage of his daydream time. It was there that he could hold her, kiss her, and love her without reservation.
For so many years he had successfully hidden his feelings for her. He even tried to convince himself that he was ready to move on. That's when the Cho fiasco happened. Cho was very pretty but looking back he knew there was no way it could have worked. Cho was a safe choice. It was easy to convince everyone that he had a crush on her, she was beautiful after all…and he was "the youngest Seeker in a century" and "The-Boy-Who-Lived." (Apparently fame is everything to some people). He heard the whispers…some of the girls would say that Cho could do better then him; that she could find someone better looking. It bothered him at first. Then Hermione managed to convince him that it was jealousy and that he should think nothing of it. He was a wonderful person and any girl would be lucky to be in his life; why shouldn't he have the most beautiful girl if that's who he wanted? Cho was a year older than him and the only thing they really had in common was Quidditch. What kind of relationship could they have when there was so little common ground and no foundation? A safe one! And in Harry's mind that was reason enough at the time. Especially if it threw attention away from the ongoing speculation about him and Hermione. At the time, there were many, many reasons why Harry didn't want to 'face the music' where Hermione was concerned…not the least of which was that the thought absolutely terrified him.
Harry knew that Ron fancied Hermione. He'd always sort of thought it was more because Hermione was one of the few girls that actually talked to him. Not because he was ugly…on the contrary, Harry had overheard often enough that girls found Ron to be quite nice to look at. No, Harry thought it was more because Ron was poor. Girls their age could be very shallow and having a boyfriend who could buy them things was reason enough for any one of them to look past Ron. Hermione didn't care. She never cared about such foolishness and Harry knew that Ron loved her for it. Harry could vaguely remember laughing out loud when Ron told him about the kiss he'd finally shared with Hermione. Harry knew that it had to happen eventually (it had to or Harry would never have the chance to move forward with her) but it didn't take away the shock or make the initial ache any less painful.
"Harry, me and Hermione kissed yesterday." Said Ron quickly. Harry noticed that Ron couldn't look at him. What he didn't notice was that Ron's ears had begun to turn pink; the first sign that he was embarrassed.
Though he felt like he was dying, Harry replied, "Oh…oh really. Well…erm…uh…congratulations Ron! 'Bout time, don't you think?"
"Blimey, Harry!" Ron practically shouted. "It was like kissing my sister and I can't say I've ever been interested in kissing Ginny!" Then he began wiping his mouth as though the kiss had just happened a few moments ago. "Yuck! That will not happen again, mark my words!" Ron had finished.
Relief washed through him and he wasn't sure how to react. "I don't think kissing Ginny would be all that bad Ron." Harry said with a smile.
"Trust me, Harry. Kissing Ginny would be like kissing your sister and it's not something I recommend." Ron returned. "Kissing a girl should never feel like that. As great as it would be to see Ginny with a nice guy like you, you don't even want to go there!"
"I'll take your word for it." Harry laughed in response.
"Hermione and I decided that I should be the one to tell you. I would have told you yesterday, but I was having a bit of a hard time with it. The last thing I expected was to feel like I was kissing my sister." Ron continued. "When I thought about telling you, all I could think was, 'now how in the world do you start that conversation?'"
Harry just kept on laughing. Enjoying the feeling of relief that continued to wash over him. Now he knew that he was free to take the next step. He wasn't sure that he could wait much longer.
~Hermione~
She thought she'd seen Harry watching her many times. He would look in her direction and his eyes would sort of glaze over, and he would smile that silly, crooked smile that always managed to warm her heart. She may have known him better than anyone, but for the life of her, she could never figure out what was going on behind those beautiful emerald eyes when they glazed over like that. She knew she'd never ask because it was in those moments that he seemed most content. He had so few chances to daydream and she refused to be the one to take away what appeared to be the only good dreams he had.
She knew much of the pain that he had suffered and she knew that it was far from being over. Until Voldemort was destroyed, Harry could never give himself over to her completely. It was painful. It devastated her. She couldn't share his burden or relieve even an ounce of his pain. This was his destiny…kill or be killed. She couldn't imagine being on this earth without him and she swore that she would follow him to the gates of heaven…or hell…if she had to. She would never let him suffer alone again.
Hermione was sure that Ron fancied her and she knew that she'd never get anywhere with Harry until he knew for sure that Ron was over her. Deep down she knew that Ron didn't really love her and she had to find a way to make him realize it without feeling as though she'd broken his heart. That's why she kissed him. She loved him like a brother and she was sure that if she kissed him he would realize that he felt the same way toward her. It worked! Boy did it work!
"BLOODY HELL, Hermione! What was that?" Ron asked with a look of horror on his face.
If he'd looked into her eyes, he would have seen the smile that lingered there. As it was, he was too busy wiping his mouth to notice. She looked straight at him and said, "Excuse me? What do you mean, "what was that"? THAT…Dear Ronald, was a kiss. Not a particularly good one, mind you…but a kiss just the same."
"Ginny hasn't been dipping into the Polyjuice Potion, has she? Kissing you feels like kissing my sister!" Ron's voice continued to rise. "I may not have a lot of experience but I know it's not supposed to feel like that." Noticing her slightly raised eyebrows he hastily added, "Okay, no experience! Just stop looking at me like that."
Then, she totally surprised him when she burst out laughing. If she'd had a mirror, she would have held it up for him. His expression was beyond anything she'd imagined when she first got the idea to kiss him. It was priceless.
"Hermione. We have to tell Harry."
"I'll let you do that. I'm sure he'll get as big a laugh out of your expression as I did. That was classic Ron. Classic. I only wish Colin were here so we could immortalize that moment." She said with laughter in her voice and tears running down her face.
It was in that moment Ron realized why he loved her so much and he told her so. "Hermione," he said softly, "you're a real nutter, you know that? Watching you laugh and seeing the tears from your laughter reminds me of why I love you. You are simply the best person I know and I am both grateful and thankful to have you as part of my family. Little sis!" He finished with a smile and a soft cuff to her arm.
Hermione was momentarily speechless. She'd never heard Ron be so forthcoming with his emotions or so eloquent in his speech. "I love you too…big brother!" She said with a smile.
He pulled her to him in a big bear hug and they stood embracing each other for a moment. Content in the knowledge that no matter what, they would always be friends and they would always be a part of each other.
I wanna know what love is
I want you to show me
I wanna feel what love is
I know you can show me
~Harry~
After his talk with Ron, Harry decided he'd waited long enough…too long if he really thought about it. Come hell or high water he was going to tell Hermione he loved her.
There had never been anyone else for him. From that very first moment she'd had him and try as he might, he could not shake her; it was time for her to know that. He wasn't sorted into Gryffindor for nothing. Bravery and courage were essential factors in being placed in Gryffindor and bravery and courage were the things he was counting on.
He wanted…no needed…to feel her in his arms. To feel her lips pressed against his. To feel her heartbeat keeping time with his own.
He longed to hear her say she loved him.
~Hermione~
That's it! She thought to herself. I kissed Ron ages ago (okay, may only a couple of days but it FEELS LIKE AGES! Why hasn't Harry made a move? I was sure he just needed to know that Ron didn't love me.
Never mind. She thought a little angrily. What do you need him to come to you for? She berated herself. You're a modern woman (well, almost) and besides, desperate times call for desperate measures! Maybe I should kiss Ron again…okay, okay…not that desperate!
Hermione decided at that moment that she was going to tell Harry how she felt. She could only hope that he wouldn't laugh at her and that he would feel the same way. It wasn't like her to take chances on things she didn't already know the outcome of; this would be the first.
"I couldn't possibly feel this strongly if I was in this by myself, could I?" She asked herself in wonder.
None of that mattered anymore. All that mattered now was that she took that chance. She would figure out how to pick up the pieces of her broken heart if he rejected her. Not knowing was slowly killing her anyway.
She wanted him to hold her. She wanted him to kiss her. She wanted to feel his heartbeat.
She longed to hear him say he loved her.
~Harry and Hermione~
They saw each other at the same moment. Both of them determined to say the words. Both of them determined to face either heartbreak or forever. Both of them ready…
"Harry…"
"Hermione…"
They started together. Both of them laughed nervously.
"I…" started Hermione.
"Please…" began Harry at the same time yet again. "Please go first." Harry quickly cut in.
Hermione barely managed the words, "Harry, I really need to talk with you. Would you want to join me for a walk around the lake?"
"That's a fantastic idea, Hermione. There's something I really need to talk with you about as well." He replied.
They turned together toward the common room exit and seeing as how they were barely able to take their eyes off each other, they somehow managed to make it out of the castle without ramming into any walls or bumping into other people.
Taking a chance, Harry grabbed for Hermione's hand and when she went to lace her fingers with his they immediately let go and jumped back a little. It felt as though one of them had run their feet across a carpet for the sole purpose of shocking the other. They looked at each other in surprise and slowly put their hands together again. This time they were prepared for the shock as they laced their fingers and held on tight.
It was a while before either of them spoke. Both of them content just to be where they were. As long as they were together.
It was almost as if they were of one brain…
"Hermione…"
"Harry…"
Once again, they began together.
"I want…" She began again.
"I need…" He said softly as he turned toward her slightly while still walking along the path.
They both laughed; partly at the trouble they were having talking to each other and partly out of nervousness. They both needed to release some of the tension that had been building.
They hadn't stopped walking and they were having trouble talking. But…there were words to be said and feelings to expose and they both had to do it before they chickened out yet again.
"Harry. Stop." Hermione said softly as she slowed her pace. "Stop walking. I need you to look at me."
Harry stopped. He turned to face her. He had been deep in thought with his eyes looking down at the ground. In the instant he looked up and their eyes locked they both knew. There was nothing they could say because there were no words that could convey the depth of feeling they saw when they looked into each other's eyes. Harry grasped Hermione's other hand, interlaced their fingers, and stepped closer to her. There was little room between them. He could feel the pulse of her heart against the palms of his hands. It was keeping a steady rhythm with his own. They leaned in toward each other and searched each other's eyes one last time. Seeing no hesitation in the other, their lips met. Their hands were at their sides, their fingers laced and bursts of light, like shooting stars, were flashing behind their closed eyes. Never had anything felt so good…so right. There was an overwhelming ache in each of them, a need so raw that they couldn't help but deepen the kiss in hopes of relieving just a little of the pressure.
They could no longer stand the space they'd left between them and they stepped toward each other and pressed their bodies together. They could each hear the other's heart beat inside their heads. The pulsing sound growing louder as their kiss deepened once again. Harry gently released her hands and brought his own up to caress her face. What he felt brought him back to reality. He reluctantly released her lips so he could look into her eyes once again. He had felt her tears. It was when she reached up to caress his face that he realized the tears on his fingers was a mingling of his and hers. Never in his life had he had the opportunity to cry tears of joy. With his hands still cupping her face, he rested his forehead against hers and closed his eyes.
"I love you…"
"I love you…"
Together again.
I'm gonna take a little time
A little time to look around me
I've got nowhere left to hide
It looks like love has finally found me
How long they stood there was anyone's guess. Probably the only person who could have given them a precise amount of time was Dumbledore and neither of them were thinking much about him at the moment.
The first time their tongues collided they thought they would explode. The first kiss was heavenly but this…for this there were no words. Their stomachs tightened and they began to grab for each other. Their kisses grew more intense and they felt as though they'd never be able to get enough of each other.
Harry explored every corner of her mouth, every curve of her face, and every inch of her long, graceful neck. Hermione loved the feel of his lips on her and she spent a great deal of time reciprocating, showing him just how good it felt.
He was hungry for her. His hands were at the back of her head now and he couldn't help but pull her closer. There was hardly any room for mobility. Her arms were so tight around his back that he could literally feel her heartbeat through his shirt. Her heart was beating so fast he thought she might go into shock. He tried to ease up but that only made her hunger for him more and she somehow managed to pull him in even tighter then before.
Did she just bite me? Harry thought he was imagining it. She just bit my lip! Harry thought. Well two can play at that game.
Much to her surprise, Harry bit her back. She'd done it to test the effect. Obviously it had its desired effect and she found that she liked it just as much as he did.
She moved back to his neck. His head was back slightly and he was opening himself up to her. She kissed him for a few moments and then she giggled…right before biting him again and returning her lips to his.
He couldn't stand it any longer. His legs had long since gone weak but somehow he'd managed to keep standing...until now. Harry put his hands around Hermione's waist and without moving his lips from hers he pulled her backwards, away from the path, and gently kneeled on the ground bringing her with him.
Grateful for the chance to give her legs a break, Hermione willingly laid down beside him.
The evening was warm so neither of them had worn jackets. They lay there dressed in jeans and t-shirts. Hermione was lying on the ground with Harry laying on his side up against and just above her. He gently pulled her t-shirt from her jeans and rubbed his hand up and down her stomach and ribs. He felt her gasp against his lips. He couldn't believe that he had this kind of effect on her. He briefly wondered if she knew the power she had over him. All thought was replaced by the small electrical bolts that starting shooting through his stomach, his legs, and his…toes.
Hermione wanted him to know what he was doing to her. She wanted him to know what she was feeling. While he was trying to have a brief, coherent thought about what was happening, she pulled up his t-shirt and gently began rubbing her hand along his side and up and down his back. Every spot her hand touched felt like it was on fire. There was a trail of fire now running from the middle of his ribs down to his waist, across his back, and up and down his spine. He was being tortured…she was torturing him. And he was loving every second of it!
He so desperately wanted to make love to her. In his mind, he knew that he shouldn't but it was hard to listen when the rest of him wanted it so badly. It couldn't possibly be wrong when they obviously loved each other so desperately. The feeling between them went beyond any boundaries set by man. There was absolutely no way to measure their love for each other.
She looked at him with a mixture of love and lust in her eyes. She wanted him. She had waited all these years for him to realize he loved her and dang it, now that she had him with her; she wanted all of him. It was the first time they'd proclaimed their love for each other and the first time they'd kissed, but already she was desperate for more.
They looked at each other for a long time; both of them wanting, longing for each other.
Harry laid his head between her shoulder and her breast. He snuggled as close as he could get to her.
"Hermione. 'Mione," he said softly, loving the way her name sounded now. "You know that I love you and that because I do, we can't make love."
"I know." She whispered. She knew him too well.
"I know this isn't what you want to hear right now, but I need you to understand, Hermione. You know the final battle with Voldemort is coming. According to the prophecy, one of us must die. If I am on the verge of death and I have but one coherent thought, I want it to be that I love you with my entire being and that I left you perfect. If we made love right now and something were to happen to me…" Harry's voice cracked, "it would be so much more difficult for you to move on. I know it would be damn near impossible for me if you were taken away."
"I know." She whispered again with the slightest trace of pain in her voice.
"Think how wonderful it will be when the battle with Voldemort is over. I have never been able to imagine my life without you so when this battle ends I promise we'll have a lifetime of love…together. I just can't take from you the one thing that keeps you pure; the one thing that through all of this truly belongs to you. As much as I want to, I just can't." He finished in a gentle voice.
Hermione was crying again. This time her tears were a mixture of happiness, fear, and longing. He loved her. For now that would be enough. It had to be. He loved her enough to not take advantage of the moment, to put aside his own wants, needs, and desires no matter how difficult that might be. She loved him enough to let him.
"Harry, I love you. You've had my heart since the first moment I saw you on the train to Hogwarts when we were just eleven years old. There is nothing you can say to me now that will make me love you any less. I know that you're right and I promise that until this war is over I will never push you…no matter how much I may want to." She finished on a sigh. Then she smiled and said, "At least I can still do this..."
She turned her body slightly, lifted his chin toward her, and captured his lips once more. She heard the groan escape from him and she couldn't help but smile. It was good to know that he was just as frustrated as she was and she reveled in the fact that she had that kind of effect on him. She could still enjoy kissing him but he was leaving them both something to look forward to.
I wanna know what love is
I want you to show me
I wanna feel what love is
I know you can show me
Harry wasn't sorry for his decision. He was giving himself a reason to come back. If he made love to Hermione right now he'd die a happy, happy man. But the battle ahead was being fought for witches, wizards, and Muggles everywhere and he had to do it with a clear head. Knowing that he could ravage her as soon as the battle was over (and for the rest of his life) would make it all worthwhile!
They could no longer hide their feelings and they were quite certain that no one would be surprised by the sudden change in their relationship. After all, people had been talking about them for years…thanks in no small part to one Rita Skeeter. Harry was happier than he'd ever been…in truth, he could think of nothing, literally nothing that could make this moment more perfect.
As they picked themselves up from the ground after a few more minutes of enjoying each other and their newfound happiness, Harry's scar burst open and the pain was more intense then ever. He knew that somewhere out there Voldemort was angrier than he'd ever been and that knowledge made Harry smile.
Hermione had shown Harry the meaning of love and he was certain that in the end their love would conquer all!