Setbacks and Inspirations
Ch. 7 - There's a First Time for Everything
Lily squeezed the arms of her chair in anxiety as the door to the room opened to reveal her two best friends. They were carrying three plates, one containing all of Lily's favorite foods. Riley and Charlie, not yet noticing any differences, quickly shut the door behind them, then put the plates on a nearby dresser. As soon as they turned to face her, looks of recognition, which melted into those of confusion, reached their eyes simultaneously.
"What on Earth happened to you?" exclaimed Charlie as she ran to Lily. Crouching beside her, she grabbed Lily's hand.
Riley followed close behind. Looking at Lily's wheelchair in astonishment, she quietly whispered, "It was Him, I just know it was."
Lily tried to look at both of them, but could not help but feel a little overwhelmed. This was going to be harder then she had expected. Even after all of the times she went over the same situation in her head. Finally, she managed to say something.
Looking down at Charlie, she spoke.
"Riley's right. You-Know-Who cursed me. I was on my way home from the bus stop when he did it."
"The Dark Lord cursed you? I don't understand Lily, I thought you said you were all right. What kind of curse could have done this?" she asked. Both girls looked nervous, awaiting her response.
"I know. And I'm sorry Charlie. It's just that… I wanted to tell you guys face to face. And I was sort of dreading your reactions. I've sort of been dreading everyone's reaction actually. You've probably never heard of the curse he used. It's called Claudus."
Based on the silence that followed, she seemed to be right. She decided to elaborate.
"It paralyzes, blinds, and disallows one to speak. They've found cures for the latter two."
She'd been looking into space as she explained things and when she looked back to Charlie, she saw her friend was already teary-eyed. With Riley's hand supportively on her shoulder, she wiped away her unshed tears in embarrassment.
"So it's permanent then?" asked Riley, voice quite shaky.
"You'll never walk again?" asked Charlie.
"Yah, it is. No, I won't"
Another silence followed until something happened rather unexpectedly even for Lily. For the first time since her stay at the hospital, she started to cry too. Forgetting about everything and everyone else, the girls embraced.
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Later in the day when they were sprawled across Lily's bed, they began to converse once more. Lily talked of what had happened between herself and Voldemort. She told them what had happened on her train ride to Hogwarts, and how Sirius had been undoubtedly and somewhat suspiciously kind.
Charlie, the considerate girl she was, remained quiet as Lily and Riley talked things over. Listening carefully as they talked, Charlie held back the questions that were in her mind, burning in anticipation to be asked. When she could take it no longer, she interrupted Lily's explanations.
"Why would He want to recruit you Lily? With all due respect, you are Muggle-born. Who's ever heard of You-Know-Who recruiting the people he's trying to destroy?"
Though taken aback, Riley seemed to be curious as well. She glanced at Lily questioningly.
Lily sighed as she tried to decide the right thing to do. These were her best friends. Surely, she should tell them what was going on despite the Ministry's wishes. Guilt would without a doubt tear her down as time passed if she lied her way out of this situation. Anyway, just looking at them made her want to spill everything. She knew she could trust him. Instead of lying, Lily told them what Dumbledore had explained to her when she had asked questions similar to Charlie's.
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Now, even more time had passed and they were still sprawled upon Lily's bed. They had talked and talked until it seemed there was nothing left to discuss. They spoke of why Lily was attacked, how she would no longer play Quidditch or even be an Auror, and how she would face the school. Even though Lily felt more at ease after coming clean with her friends, all subjects were worn to the bone. After a while, they sat in silence and although they had discussed things so much, they felt as though nothing had been accomplished.
Riley broke the silence.
"So," she started, "uh, how do you think you're going to find out what your power is? I've never even heard of an Unknown so I have no idea how to help."
Lily sighed.
"No one knows how to help. Not even Dumbledore."
There was another uncomfortable moment of ceased conversation.
Now Charlie sighed.
"You know you could probably still be an Auror. They wouldn't -"
"Fat chance," Lily interrupted sounding miserable. "Who's ever heard of a crippled Auror? That's just ridiculous."
"Well you won't get anywhere with that attitude," she replied, sounding hurt.
"You have to admit though Char, no one would ever hire her. They'd most likely ask if she was mad and slam the door in her face. How would she keep up with the Death Eaters? They're not going to slow down and walk instead of run just because she's in a wheelchair."
"Well, maybe she can investigate or something. Aurors don't only attempt to blast criminals to smithereens you know."
"I don't want to investigate. You know that Charlie."
Charlie let out another sigh.
"They could strap you to your broom maybe. Hold you up with a spell or something. They could attach a chair," she suggested.
Lily smiled, thinking this was a joke at first. When she looked up to see Charlie's serious expression, she couldn't hold the laughter inside. Riley too was having trouble and soon all three were chuckling to themselves at the image.
"We should feel guilty for finding such things amusing," said Charlie covering her smile behind a hand.
"I know, but wouldn't the Slytherins be in heaven?" Riley reflected.
Lily sobered at this and then groaned. "Well won't classes be fun tomorrow when everyone sees me for the first time."
"Lily, we've gone over this a jillion times. Yah, it'll be awkward at first but they'll get over it soon and nobody will even notice the bloody chair," said Charlie, exasperated.
"I hope you're right," said Lily, blowing the bangs out of her eyes.
So do I, thought Charlie.
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It was the next day and Lily had yet to leave the safety of her room for the time since she had first entered it the day before. With the encouragement of her friends she felt a little, though not a lot, less terrified about the moments to come.
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With her friends behind her, she descended from her room. The Common room was crowded with anxious students, all prepared for their first classes of the school year. It seemed to Lily that one by one the students began to take notice. The crowd grew more silent as more people saw her.
Different looks marked different features. There was confusion, curiosity, and shock to name a few. She could barely gather the strength to continue, for with every coming second, more eyes were staring. As beads of sweat started to form along her forehead, suddenly she felt herself being pushed by someone and soon she was moving at a quicker pace toward the door.
She couldn't help but look around as the steady hum of whispers filled her ears. People were pointing at her as if she couldn't see them when they did so. There was Stacy from fifth year, blue eyes that seemed to pierce right through her. She could see Jeffrey from Seventh, whispering away with a good friend, looking as if they were trying to solve a mighty puzzle. A girl from first year, she saw, looked more confused then anyone. Of course, the first years didn't know who she was. Then there were the Marauders, away in a corner. They weren't whispering but were silent.
She saw Sirius and they made eye contact. The pity that she hated so much was still there in his grey eyes. She looked to Peter who didn't seem much different then he usually did. As she saw him though, something, a certain kind of awareness, came to life very suddenly in her mind. She now understood even further, why he avoided her curious eyes so much. She mentally cursed herself for giving him such a hard time while not even realizing it. When her eyes reached Remus's, they also looked interested. When he saw her looking, he quickly looked away. He appeared to be scolding himself as Lily had been. Before she could see James's reaction, the reaction most anticipated by Lily, they were at the door and were out in a flash.
"Well," said Charlie as the door shut behind them, "that wasn't so bad." She didn't sound too confident as she stated this though, and Riley gave her a look.
Lily let out a long breath and they were on their way to classes. They would skip breakfast this morning. Facing an even larger crowd would definitely be a little more than overwhelming.
Waking up that morning, they had found schedules at their bedsides. They had Transfiguration with the Ravenclaws first. Lily hated the class but Ravenclaws were acceptable
The lesson went well considering the subject, but like in the common room, no one held back his or her stares. Herbology, Potions, Ancient Runes and Lunchtime were not much better and her route to dinner only made things worse. Given her location, she had no choice but to use one of the busiest stairwells in all of Hogwarts.
As now was usual, when Lily approached the first step of a staircase, the entire thing formed a ramp. In result, many unfortunate, unsuspecting students lost their footing and very ungracefully fell, knocking others to the ground as well. Soon, almost the entire stairway was a heap of sprawled students.
Apologizing as much as possible as she passed these victims by, Lily only managed to worsen their condition when she exited the staircase. As soon as Lily's wheel left the end of the stairway, the flat surface transformed back into stairs, and many of the people who had managed to recover lay sprawled on the steps from a second fall. They didn't know what hit them. By the time it was dinner, Lily felt more than emotionally exhausted.
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Lily and her friends entered the Great Hall without the fear they had felt before. During this long day, they had encountered many things that surpassed the scariness of the idea of everyone watching her. After all, they had run into Slytherins.
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