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Steal My Kisses
Mei Queen
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Authoress' Note- There probably won't be too many chapters left in this story; I've actually already decided how I want it to end. But please review. I'm going on vacation (I wanted to update for all of you before I left), and won't be back 'til next Friday. It would just be really cool if I came back to a bunch of reviews in my inbox, it makes me feel all warm and fuzzy and loved! P.S. A bunch of you pointed out that Grant was supposed to be in Ravenclaw, not Hufflepuff. All I can say is, oops, my bad. I'm juggling five stories, and I really wish there was a MeiQueen Lexicon, but sadly, I'm not that popular. Agh. Sorry, though. You're all right, I'm wrong. Grant is supposed to be in the Ravenclaw, like I said in the Prologue…or wherever it was that I said it…
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PREVIOUS-
James cared about her, sure, but she was making him absolutely miserable by agreeing to Grant and not giving James a chance to prove himself as a good boyfriend. James knew he could make Lily happy. He didn't know how…but he just knew.
Besides, she had gotten involved with him in the broom closet out of her own volition. She hadn't been forced against a wall (like last night, for example). Lily had had every opportunity to get away. If he left her alone with this boyfriend long enough, Remus had to be right- she would come to him.
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Chapter 4- Ravenclaw vs. Gryffindor
I sighed, bringing my knees up to my chest as I stared intently into the dying embers. It was late. Really late, like one in the morning. But since it was a Saturday night, it really didn't matter when I woke up the next morning, thankfully. It had been three weeks since I was shut up in the Hospital Wing because of the stresses of Potter and Grant, and since I re-committed to Grant Ashcroft.
What am I doing? Why wasn't I honest with Grant when I had the chance? We should be broken up by now…we barely see each other, and when we do, there really isn't a whole lot to say! It's so frustrating! I know what I need to do, but I don't know how to do it. I don't want to hurt him, because he really hasn't done anything to deserve me going off and snogging Potter…that's another thing. Where has Potter been? For the past two years, he has asked me out biweekly. I haven't spoken to or seen him (except at Head duties) in three weeks… he barely even looks at me. I don't know what to do. We were really warming up to each other, and now, he's practically an iceberg. I don't know what could be causing it…unless…he's decided to give up on me? Maybe he's decided I'm not worth the trouble? How would I feel if I didn't have James Potter there for me all the time? I've always complained what a big pain he was to deal with and what an egotistical prat he could be…but if he wasn't there at all anymore…how would I feel?
My thoughts were interrupted as I heard a swish as the portrait swung open, ushering in four boys out way after curfew- the Marauders.
Turning to them, I realized that I really couldn't be bothered to care where they were or why they were there. It was irresponsible, but I didn't feel like deducting points. Indeed, the boys stopped in guilty shock at my gaze.
"Well? Aren't you going to deduct a ridiculous amount of points?" Sirius Black prompted, seemingly at a loss at my impassive expression.
"No. I don't care. Just go to your dorm."
"But…but? Lily? Are you okay?" Remus asked quietly, walking over to bend down and meet my eyes. Remus Lupin is a sweetheart; he and I have been there for each since I realized he was a werewolf back in the fifth year.
I smiled, waving to show that it really wasn't that important. I allowed Remus to give me a short hug, and I resumed my staring contest with the fireplace, not bothering to see if the boys had exited. My thoughts about James and Grant resumed, and I felt some warm tears slowly slip down my cheeks.
But if I had kept my eyes trained on the doorway to the boys' dorms, I would have noticed a certain raven-haired boy lingering, looking as if his heart was breaking more with each of my tears that fell.
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"Lily? Do you have anything to add?" James Potter asked cautiously during the prefects' meeting that Friday.
"Huh? Oh. No…have a good weekend, everyone," I muttered, picking up my bag and turning for the door. Gathering my courage, I waited outside the doorway for all the prefects to file out, all happily joking about the upcoming Quidditch match between Ravenclaw and Gryffindor.
Soon enough, I saw just the boy I was looking for, and I tapped him on the shoulder as he walked out joking with Remus.
"James? Can I talk to you?"
I thought I could see the ghost of a grin on his face at my question, but he nodded and allowed me to lead him off to a desolate corner of the hallway.
"What's up?" he asked, running a hand through his hair and fixing his hazel eyes on my own.
"Not a lot, I suppose. Actually, nothing has happened. That's exactly the problem. Everything's as it was three weeks ago," I said exasperatedly, throwing my hands up in the air. I didn't know exactly what I wanted to say to Potter, really, I was just hoping that if I babbled long enough, the correct sentiment would magically make its way out.
"Then I don't see what you could possibly have to say to me," James said coldly, his eyes wary. The mood had suddenly changed. That spark in his eyes had dissipated and the ease of our conversation had gone with it.
"I just- I don't know what I want to say to you…I guess…I think my main point that I wanted to say…"
"Yes?" he asked, looking down at me with hope beginning to spark in his expression.
"I miss you. You haven't talked to me, even asked me out; in three weeks…it's the longest we've gone fifth year without interacting. And I miss you," I finished sincerely, exhaling and twiddling my thumbs as I waited for his response.
He chuckled slightly. "I didn't know you noticed."
"Of course I noticed! I haven't even heard one rumour from a first year about us going for a secret rendezvous in the Heads Room in at least a month!"
"I thought you hated those rumours," James whispered, meeting my eyes and flashing a smile.
"I do. Well, I did…I thought I did. They aren't that bad, once you don't have them anymore."
"Remember that one about how we were pairing all the prefects up just so we could patrol together and snog in the Astronomy Tower with nobody being the wiser? That was a pretty brilliant one, it's one of my personal favourites," he said, chuckling.
"Or how you taught me how to fly just so we could go at it in mid-air on the Quidditch Pitch?" I said, laughing hysterically by this point.
James grinned. "That would be so awesome."
"You know, sometimes you should probably keep those type of thoughts to yourself," I finished with a smile, punching him softly in the arm.
"So what are you doing right now? We could catch up on the details of the life of Lily Evans for the past few weeks that I haven't been in it."
Opening my mouth to respond, I (to my great surprise) found myself replying, "Sure. Why not?"
But as we turned to head to the kitchens for a few treacle tarts and some tea, who should we run into but my boyfriend himself. It was Grant Ashcroft, in the flesh.
"Hey, sweetheart, how was your day?"
My face flushed with embarrassment at both the nickname and the situation. James Potter's eyes had gone steely, his expression impassive and I could instantly tell that the chemistry I had worked to re-spark in our conversation had once again died. He nodded stiffly to Grant before saying "I'll see you later, Lily" and stomping back to the common room, leaving me helplessly stranded between a rock and a hard place.
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By the time I got back to the Common Room that night, it was dark and all of the Gryffindors were in bed. I had muttered a lame excuse about needing to write an essay to Grant, who looked considerably hurt, and sprinted for the Library. I hid out there until after nightfall, I didn't even go down to the Great Hall for dinner. Instead, I had headed to the kitchens for a secret snack, and ended up spending a few hours in there listening to the latest gossip about the castle from the house elves…they know everything about everyone.
The next day, it was bright and early when Annabelle decided to shake me awake. "Get up, Lil! It's Quidditch today!"
"Wuzzgoinon?" I muttered, groaning about the amount of light that was coming into the dorm. "Go bother Em, honestly. It's bloody early, Bella!"
"It's never too early for Quidditch, Lil! Now here comes the real question…who are you rooting for today?"
I bolted upright with irritation. "Gryffindor, naturally! It's my house. I don't care what house Grant is in, I'm not rooting for it."
"So you're rooting for Potter, then?" Emmeline asked with a smile, catching on to the implication of Annabelle's question.
"No. Not…really. I'm rooting for him because he is associated with the Quidditch team I'm rooting for, so in that sense…sort of," I finished, scratching my head slightly. But really, would it be so bad if I were rooting for James Potter…with his quick reflexes, handsome features, and quite nice arse?
"Exactly," Annabelle replied smugly. "You girls better get dressed; everyone will be down at the pitch in an hour or so."
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Emmeline and Annabelle were sitting with me at breakfast, watching James Potter occasionally longingly glance at me, then cast furious looks in Grant's direction. Grant, however, was sitting with all of his team-mates and was too absorbed in a possible play to notice.
I sighed and idly stirred my porridge. What am I supposed to do? I feel like if I'm going to go for Potter, I need to do it soon, before he completely loses his interest in me. I don't want to string him along. I don't want to be juggling two guys like this, either. I need to pick one, and I need to do it soon.
Emmeline gently touched my arm with her finger before pointing in the direction of the Ravenclaw table.
Grant was looking over at me, mouthing "I love you" before heading out the door to get ready for the game. James noticed, naturally, and had slammed down his goblet, storming out to the pitch, making sure to elbow Grant harshly on his way out.
Oh, dear Merlin. Make that I need to pick one of them yesterday.
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At the beginning of the match, I nervously watched from the stands as my boyfriend shook hands with Potter, both looking like they were gripping with all of their strength, glaring ferociously at one another.
This seems a little too cliché, I thought, groaning slightly to myself with my head in my hands. I was sitting with Emmeline, as Annabelle was a chaser. The seat to my left was empty; at least it was until a few moments later, when Remus Lupin slid into it.
"Hey, Lily," he said casually, mussing his sandy blonde locks slightly as he said it.
"Hi Remus…how's it going?" I asked in an equally casual tone, hoping, but not really expecting, for his perspective on the situation with James.
So it was naturally quite the surprise when Remus cocked his head to the side and studied me, finally saying quietly so that Emmeline couldn't hear, "He's really torn up about this, you know."
"What?"
"James. He's upset. He misses you."
"Oh. Well, I miss him too; his persistence has been a constant companion of mine all these years."
"He loves you, Lily. Can't you see that? Why are you leading him on?"
"I'm not…I don't think. I care about him too," I whispered, surprising both me and Remus with my answer.
Emmeline poked me hard in the arm. "What's going on up there?"
"What are you talking about, Em?"
"It looks like Potter's jumped on somebody else's broom…"
"Are you kidding?" I shrieked, my gaze darting to the sky, where, indeed, James Potter had jumped onto Grant Ashcroft's broom.
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"I can't believe this," I groaned, putting my head in my hands, my gaze trailed over to where my boyfriend and James Potter were sitting in beds alongside each other, passed out from some intensive Sleeping Draughts and boasting various injuries.
"This wouldn't have happened if it weren't for you leading them on, you know," a voice from the end of the hall summed up simply. Turning, I saw a tall, handsome brunette boy- Sirius Black. Black usually doesn't talk to me much, but I was amazed by how he managed to completely nail what I was thinking so effectively.
"Merlin, I know. But it's not like I asked Potter to jump on the bloody broom. It's not my fault he's cracked."
Sirius cast a dark look in my direction at the slight on his friend. "Prongs isn't cracked. He's in love."
"What's the difference?" I found myself asking darkly, twirling a scarlet strand of hair around my finger.
"Not much," he snorted with a grin. "But for reasons I don't entirely understand, he picked you. He loves you, he cares about you, and you're taking him for granted. You need to stop, before you lose him forever."
I felt a salty, hot tear run down my cheek. Sirius wrapped an arm around me, pulling me into a reassuring hug.
"It'll all by okay, Lily," he whispered. "Just make the right decision."
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I stuck around the Hospital Wing long after Sirius had left, waiting for the boys to wake up. Grant came around first.
"Hi, sweetheart," he whispered, smiling at me.
"Hi. How are you feeling?"
"Not too badly for having a full-grown boy jump me in mid-air. What is Potter on?" he asked, scratching his head in confusion. He really had no idea why he'd been attacked that morning.
"He loves me. He wants me to break up with you," I summed up bluntly, not being able to make eye contact with him while I said it.
"And what do you want?" he asked quietly, looking down at his clasped hands.
"I…don't know. But I know enough to know that if I'm not sure…I shouldn't be with anyone."
"So this is it, then?" Grant asked, his eyes looking dangerously glassy, meanwhile getting up from his bed.
"I…I think so. I'm really sorry about the way I had to do this, but I feel terrible for stringing along two boys that I care about."
Grant Ashcroft nodded, mussing his blonde hair with his hand slightly. "It's all right, Lily. I'm happy to know that you'll be happier this way. You've been distant for weeks; it was only a matter of time. Okay, well…this has been sufficiently awkward; I'm going back to the dorms."
Reaching out to give me one last hug, Grant kissed me lightly on top of my head before turning and quickly striding out of the Hospital Wing- and out of my life.
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Authoress' Note: Once again, please don't forget to review! I would just really like to come back from vacation and have some wonderful reviews to look forward to! Thank you all for reading and reviewing, I love you all for it!
TO MY 'UNWRITTEN' FANS- I am very sorry, but that is the only story I will not be able to update before I leave. I really tried to make it, but my laptop has just died on me for the sixth time, it is 10 PM, and my dad is shaking me awake at 4 AM so we can leave by 5…so I profoundly apologize. At least I got all the stories that I left on cliffhangers updated.