Harry arrived back at the cottage at 11pm. His face had several large bruises on it, and his clothes were torn and muddy. He tried to let himself in quietly, hoping not to disturb anyone that was sleeping. Every step he took seemed to make his body scream in pain. He walked through the dark hallway and made his way quietly to the living room. He sighed deeply and flopped onto the couch gratefully.
"OW!" shouted Ron, leaping up from underneath Harry and sending him flying across the coffee table. The lights immediately went on and Luna's laughter filled the air. Ron looked quite startled.
"You could have turned the light on mate, what is it with you and waking me up in weird ways, I'm starting to think you have a problem…" he continued. Harry grinned and threw a cushion at him. He stood up and looked around to see everyone's blankets piled on couches and chairs.
"Having a sleepover?" asked Harry grinning.
"Actually, Hermione wanted to wait up for you, then Ron did too. So we all decided to sleep down here so that we'd all be able to make sure you got home ok," said Susan.
"Although it doesn't look as if you're alright at all Harry." said Luna, "In fact, you look quite awful." Harry laughed at Luna and sat heavily down on the chair with her, shoving her playfully aside. Hermione stood up from the couch she was sitting on and walked away. Harry was wondering what he had done wrong when she came back carrying a large and very old brown book. It landed with a thud on the table and she began to read it anxiously. They all looked at her strangely. For someone who had been so intent upon seeing Harry return home safely, she certainly wasn't acting that way. She raised her wand, pointed it at Harry and muttered a few things under her breath. To Harry's surprise and relief the aches and pains that he had come home with vanished instantly. He glass on the coffee table showed his reflection clearly, and he was happy to see that his bruises and scrapes had also gone. Actually, he felt much better now than he had before he left the meeting!
"Thanks Hermione." said Harry smiling at her. She smiled back quietly and resumed her position on the couch.
"Right!" said Ron, "This calls for some butterbeer!" They all sat and talked late into the night, Harry telling them the tale with the two death eaters and how Neville had been quite extraordinary. Eventually Luna and Susan went to bed, which was what Ron and Hermione had been hoping for. They wanted to know what Snape had told Harry. Harry contemplated not telling them at first, but decided that he couldn't keep something like this from his best friends. He made them pledge their secrecy, and spent the next ten minutes telling them everything that had happened in the kitchen at Grimmauld place.
"That's disgusting!" said Ron, outraged "Your poor Mum Harry having a grease ball like that wanting her."
"Ron!" said Hermione crossly "Don't be so unsympathetic! So that's the reason Dumbledore trusted him then Harry? He loved your mum so much that there was no way he would have ever thought of betraying her to Voldemort?"
"It seems so," said Harry. They were all silent other than the odd word from Ron, usually consisting of 'weird!' or 'wrong!'
"I sort of have pity for Snape now though. Not that I like him or anything, I hate him for the way he's treated me…all because he's a jealous tosser." said Harry. The word tosser earned a small smack on the arm from Hermione, but Ron raised his butterbeer and drank to it.
"Tell me you still have the Horcrux Harry," said Ron suddenly. Harry looked surprised. He had completely forgotten about the locket he had put deep in his robes. It was obvious how tired he was when he forgot something like that. He dug into his robes, hoping that he hadn't lost it during the fight. His hand found the solid lump of cold metal, and he pulled it out and held it up to the light.
"So it's Hermione's turn to activate it right?" asked Ron. Harry looked at Hermione in horror until he remembered he had agreed to let her and Ron activate one Horcrux each.
"I'm the one that's supposed to do that, remember? I'm the chosen one for this wonderful task…" said Harry.
"You're too tired after everything that's happened tonight. Besides, with you and Ron here nothing too terrible can happen to me." said Hermione, and reached for the locket.
"NO!" shouted Harry. Ron spat out a little butterbeer and looked at Harry with a very odd look on his face, something a lot like suspicion.
"Lets deal with it tomorrow Hermione. It can wait, we all need to get some rest." Harry continued. They sat in silence for a while longer, Hermione not looking nearly as upset as she should be at Harry's outburst. They talked for a while longer until Ron fell asleep on the couch.
Harry stood up and motioned Hermione to follow him. They walked quietly down the hallway, put on warm jackets, and left the cottage as quietly as they could. They walked up the dark country road in silence. He was trying to resist the urge to grab and kiss her. He tried thinking of other things, but his mind kept flitting back to her. He thought of her in danger when Greyback attacked them. He thought of how she had been in danger in the room of requirement. The idea of her even trying to put on that locket made him want to be sick. He couldn't stand the thought of her well being in jeopardy. He watched her walking out of the corner of his eye; he loved the way she held her head up high. He watched her eyes shining in the moonlight; he loved how the moon struck her skin and made her look like a beautiful mythical creature. He loved the way she spoke; he loved how her mind worked. He loved how she always did what was right, he loved that she was loyal no matter what it cost her. He loved that she always said what was on her mind even if it made everyone around her angry. He loved…
"Harry," said Hermione, interrupting the dangerous path his mind had been taking. "Do you have any idea how worried I was about you tonight?" He stopped and looked into her face and saw that tears were falling once again. This didn't seem to bother him as much as it had with Cho. In fact, all he felt when he saw Hermione cry was the urge to make it better, to stop her pain. These thoughts confused and scared him quite a lot.
"What was even worse, was trying to act like I was worried about you the way the rest of them were. I can't do this Harry! I can't pretend I don't feel this way about you anymore, I feel like I'm going crazy! Do you feel even the tiniest bit of what I feel like? I feel like you're attracted to me, but I'm the one who has the feelings. I just don't know if I can handle this anymore…I feel like you're playing seesaw with my head. One minute you want me and the next you don't. I can't give you the time you want Harry. I'm going crazy waiting to see if you want me or not. I'm not going to wait around, hoping that you want to be with me when you could very well decide you don't want me. I won't wait around for you any longer and I won't put myself through this kind of torture. I deserve more than that so make your decision now. Do you want me to be your girlfriend or do you want me to be your friend? " said Hermione, her tears falling quickly. She waited with her heart in her throat, hoping this was the push Harry needed. In truth she would wait for Harry as long as he wanted, but she didn't want to put herself through that kind of torment. Harry stared hard at her and she felt like he was looking into her soul. She hoped he wanted her, she hoped that he would love her…she hoped.
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I'm not a perfect person
There's many things I wish I didn't do
But I continue learning
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know
I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you
I'm sorry that I hurt you
It's something I must live with everyday
And all the pain I put you through
I wish that I could take it all away
And be the one who catches all your tears
That's why I need you to hear
I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is You [x4]
I'm not a perfect person
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know
I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you
I've found a reason to show
A side of me you didn't know
A reason for all that I do
And the reason is you
Hoobastank - The Reason
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Harry's mind was reeling, he had to make up his mind now, for better or worse. He looked into her eyes desperately trying to find the answer he needed. He saw longing, lust and maybe even a little love for him flash across her eyes like her were reading a book. He knew he could get lost in those eyes forever, and he knew that there really wasn't a decision to be made. When had there been? He seemed to have been captivated by her, and it was only getting worse. He loved Ron dearly, but he knew he couldn't give this up. It broke his heart and made him feel deliriously happy all at once.
"Hermione…" said Harry, "If you need a decision now then so be it. I want you to be with me. I don't know how it happened but I know that it feels right. I'm sorry if I've hurt you, but you have me now. I don't want anyone else, just you Hermione, just you…Don't think I haven't been feeling what you have. You're in all of this because of me. You could have been killed easily the last couple of day, and why? Because you want to help me. Whenever I think of what could happen to you because of me I feel so guilty. What would I do without you? You are the only thing I have now that's worth fighting for. I know I have Ron and his family, some friends at school…But you…you're what's driving me right now. I need and want you more than you could know."
Hermione stared at Harry shocked. These were the kind of words that she had wanted to hear from him since her summer in Italy, was she dreaming? Did he really feel that deeply about her? Harry was equally as surprised by what he had said. He didn't know where that had come from, and he was feeling a little anxious at what that might mean for the two of them. But he also couldn't lie to himself. He didn't know where these feelings had come from, or if they had always been there and he just didn't know it. What he did know is that what he had just told her felt true and right. His whole life was a complete mess right now, but he was glad that he had kissed Hermione. He was glad she wanted him, because he wanted her just as much. He didn't really care if next month she decided she didn't want to be with him, because at this moment in time it felt right to want to be with her. He suddenly laughed at how light his heart felt, lighter than it had in weeks.
"What are you laughing at Harry?" said Hermione in a small tearful voice.
"Us," said Harry, "How did we get here? You've seen me agonise over Cho and Ginny. I've seen you with Krum and being lovesick over Ron. We were the last two people that should have romantic feelings for each other. Hermione Granger, my best friend…what have you done to me?"
Hermione laughed with him and they sat down on the grass next the road. He looked down at her seriously and stroked her hair with tenderness. She smiled shyly up at him and their eyes locked.
"I'm done fighting this Hermione, let's just see where it takes us. I can't push you out of my mind anymore, I'm starting to think it's impossible…" Harry said quietly/
He felt butterflies in the pit of his stomach. For better or worse, he was going to kiss her. A part of himself wanted to stop himself and do the right thing. He wanted to tell Ron first so it wouldn't be behind his friends back. But even as all these thoughts whirled around his mind he was still leaning in closer. The truth of the matter was that he wanted Hermione so much that he was willing to put his friendship on the line for it. He had lost control of his emotions when Sirius had died…but nothing like this. They sat on the grass in the moonlight kissing until Hermione wasn't sure if she was even one person anymore. She had never been so happy and so alive. Her whole body felt like it had little electric pulses going off in every area. She was amazed that he could do this to her just by kissing her. She got up on her knees and pushed him down onto the grass, straddling him.
"Bloody hell Hermione, warn me when you're going to be violent with me will you?" he said playfully.
"Shut up and kiss me," she said, pushing herself onto him. He let out a groan and kissed her hard. She moved her hands under his shirt, feeling his chest like she had longed to do for so long. Harry was trying to keep control of himself and was having great difficulty. Hermione noticed this and decided to show him a more daring side of her. She thought back to all the dreams she had had about Harry and found a little bit of courage. She rolled off Harry and moved to his side. He carried on kissing her intently, and was stunned when she moved his hand under her shirt to her breast. At first he just left it there, he even stopped kissing her as he looked into her eyes with a questioning look.
"You're not the only one that can lose control you know…" whispered Hermione and put her hand on top of his and showed him how to touch her. Hermione was feeling dizzy by the time Harry had stopped his explorations and started kissing her deeply again. They moaned into each other's mouths trying to control themselves. But can passion that strong between two people ever be controlled? Harry moved his hands to the back of her waist and started stroking softly, then his hands slowly moved to her thighs. Hermione's breathing was ragged now. She was praying that he would touch her, and raised her hips whenever his hands brushed her thighs. He stopped kissing her and looked deep into her eyes as he slowly stroked her inner thigh, inching upwards slowly…
"If you want me to stop, tell me," he whispered. She said nothing and stared into his eyes as if mesmerised. The sensible Hermione had vanished, and left only the Hermione that wanted Harry with every fibre of her being. He slowly unzipped her trousers, and slid them down to her thighs. Hermione felt heat like she had never known before, and when she finally felt his fingers brush against her she felt like she was going to explode. He slipped his fingers inside her underwear and slid them to where she was wet. She gripped him harder and buried her head into his shoulder.
"No," he whispered, "I want to see you." She looked deep into his eyes as he slowly began to touch her again. She let out moan after moan and Harry felt like he was going to lose control just watching her. She began to shiver uncontrollably against him and she bit on her lip hard. Her breathing was getting faster and faster, the heat building in her to an indescribable climax. Eventually she let out a cry that echoed along the road, and she fell weakly against him. Harry kissed her tenderly and was secretly amazed that he had managed to do that to her. After she gained a little strength she returned the favour, and Harry had never felt anything like it. They lay there for a long time stroking each other tenderly in the moonlight. Hermione was wondering how they had gone from trying to ignore each other the day before, to where they were now.
"Your wild teenage hormones Harry," said Hermione smiling at him. Harry smiled at her but knew it was more than hormones and more than just attraction. He felt panicked all of a sudden. Where had all this come from? Was it right, or was he just a stupid mistaken teenager?
"You know that we need to tell Ron as soon as possible don't you Harry?" asked Hermione. Harry nodded his head, but changed the subject quickly. He didn't want his guilt ruining a moment like this.
Later on they walked down the road hand in hand, stopping sometimes to kiss, sometimes to play fight and tickle, and sometimes just to look into each others eyes. They stopped outside the cottage and Harry kissed her deeply. The sun was beginning to rise on the horizon, and the birds had suddenly become quite active.
"I can't believe we just did that." Hermione whispered, "Anyone could have driven by and seen us."
"There aren't many people in this area." Harry whispered back "Besides, it was your fault…you drove me to it."
"I most certainly did not," Hermione whispered in a mock offensive tone "I am a well behaved woman I shall have you know. You led me astray…" Harry laughed quietly and kissed her again.
"You didn't seem to mind though," he whispered kissing her slowly.
"You have you charms Mr. Potter. I couldn't resist them, if I didn't know any better I would have thought you'd have slipped me a lust potion…" she whispered running her hands over his back.
"We should go inside. Come on. Hopefully no one is awake. " said Harry quietly.
"No one in there has ever been awake at dawn Harry." said Hermione "At least not of their own free will" She followed Harry into the cottage and they waited in the hallway to make sure the coast was clear.
"We should try and get some sleep," she said and kissed Harry on the cheek. He smiled at her and kissed her quickly before they made there way upstairs and into their bedrooms. On the couch Ron stirred suddenly and looked around. 'Where'd everyone go?' he thought, and an uneasy feeling crept into the pit of his stomach. He grabbed his blanket and went upstairs quietly. He stopped outside Harry's door and listened. He didn't know why he felt suspicious all of a sudden, or what he felt suspicious about. After a moment he opened it slowly and saw Harry lying alone on his bed. 'I am a stupid git' he thought, and made his way to his bedroom. Harry let out a sigh of relief as he heard Ron leave the room. He would have to tell him soon, he couldn't keep secrets from his best friend. He only hoped their friendship would survive.
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