AN: Ok guys, here is ch. 4. Thanks for being patient and thanks to everyone who reviews. I try to reply to everyone but if I forgot or missed you, I'll get it next time around. Enjoy!
Hermione felt the cold night air on her hot face and shuddered. She had apparated to the countryside that she often snuck off to in order to catch a few moments to herself. It was her thinking spot, the one place that she could go to work through everything that clouded her usually clear mind. It was hard for her to be cruel and cold the way she had to be. That kind of behavior was not in her nature but it as necessary to survive.
The others looked up to her. She was their leader and she had responsibilities as such but that did not mean it was easy. The vampires were ruthless and vicious. She had seen them on many occasions kill just for sport. She would partake in their conversations of what it felt like to watch the life of a victim slowly slip away and to know that they held that kind of power. They were killers, indulging in the blood of human beings. If they loved, it was only physical, sex being a favorite past time.
In the coven's presence, Hermione was hard and cold natured but everyone knew that she had a soft spot. They respected her because she rarely let anything deter her from made decisions and her style was elegant and graceful but could strike fear into the bravest of men. Taunis had taught her that. He taught her how to be cruel and have no moral conscious. He had taught her how to kill.
On the bank of the quiet stream, Hermione sat and remembered the first time that she ever took the life of another person.
**
It was a night in late autumn when Taunis took her to Budapest. He took her deep into a run down village to an inn at the center of the ghetto where the whores and drunks wandered the streets eternally. He led her down the alley next to the inn and stopped at the entrance of a dilapidated brothel. She stopped abruptly and turned on him.
"You filthy bastard. You kidnap me, bring me to Budapest and take me to a brothel? If I could, I would kill you where you stand." Her tone was dripping with disdain and anger but Taunis laughed a humorless laugh and grinned, exposing his teeth.
"You have much to learn Hermione. We feed from brothels on occasion because these fools gorge themselves on drugs," A gleam came to his eye and his grin widened, "And sex. When you combine blood lust and sex, well, you get the most exquisite combination of pleasure."
Hermione stood shocked and disgusted and quickly became horrified as a realization hit her.
"I don't know what you are playing at, but I will not, WILL NOT, have sex with you. Ever."
There was the humorless laugh again and then a pair of hands clamped down on her shoulders. Taunis gently sniffed her neck from base to ear and spoke in a voice more quiet than death.
"Oh, but you will. I did not waste my blood on you so I could have a `friend.' You are mine; bound to me by blood and magic, and you will give me what I want. Or I will take it."
"You will not get what you want from me without a fight. I never give up and I never give in."
"We'll see how much of a fight you put up when the time comes. But for now we must feed. You will soon grow
weak and I haven't the patience to carry you around. Come, into the Madame's home we shall go."
Hermione turned away quickly and stopped at the door. Taunis nudged her to enter but she didn't budge. He moved to face her, looking increasingly aggravated.
"Is there a problem? Can you not handle the task of opening a door?"
Her anger rising, Hermione clamped her jaw and closed her eyes to collect her thoughts.
"We have to be invited inside." Her tone was short and angry but Taunis laughed, his amusement apparent.
"Not here. This is one place where our kind is always welcome."
He grabbed Hermione by the arm and pushed her through the oak door and into the brothel's entrance room. The sight that befell her eyes made her want to vomit.
Cast all around the room were couches and chairs occupied by half, or whole, naked men and women. Smoke clouded the room as opium pipes were passed from one addict to another. Hermione's breath caught in her throat when she saw the corner of the room and what lay behind the sheer curtain that guarded it.
There was a man, naked, sprawled out on a plush armchair. Atop him was a woman, her long silvery hair covering her back and posterior. The man was moaning through his disoriented state, and the woman laughed as she made a deep incision in his chest with her fingernail. She bent her head down to the wound and drank greedily. Hermione watched as the man's complexion blanched. His moans were soon gone along with the life within him.
Hermione shuddered and shook with fear at the prospect that it was just that simple to kill someone. She was shaken from her thoughts when Taunis poked her gently in the back. She turned halfway, afraid to look at him.
"Through the curtain. It's your turn now."
Hermione stood frozen to the floor. She did not want to go through that curtain. She did not want to kill, but she had no choice. Either she had to kill or she would die. The fact that it was a survival issue made the task at hand no easier.
She walked slowly to the curtain and stopped. Taking a great big breath, she gently pushed aside the sheer cloth and stepped into the room. Taunis guided her to the left side of the room where several men where passed out. Only one was half coherent.
He was handsome, with dark hair and light brown eyes. His shirt was off and Hermione admired his light complexion.
Taunis moved beside her and she looked at him questioningly.
"I understand that you are new to this so I will guide you through it. But you must do exactly as I say and it will make this a little easier for you. Go to him, don't speak, don't try to befriend him. Concentrate on his aura and feel the artery in his neck. Put your finger on it but only for a moment. This will stop the circulation long enough to increase the blood flow once you break the skin. Then you simply drink."
Hermione stood stock still as her mind reeled. She knew she couldn't do it, she didn't want to but before she had the chance to try and run, Taunis grabbed her arm and dragged her to the man. She sighed in defeat and closed her eyes.
She smelled his aura and it was like nothing she had ever smelled before. It was thick but not pungent, faint but not quite gone. It pulsed and danced around him, flowing through him with every breath.
Hermione realized that she would not be able to simply take the man's life. She needed a push, a nudge in the right direction. So she did the only thing she could think of: she got angry. She thought about Taunis' actions and words, how she would never see the sun again, and how she was certain that she would never gain hold Harry in her arms.
Her eyes snapped open and she approached the man. She did as Taunis said and put her finger on his carotid artery for about thirty seconds. She released and mustering every ounce of anger in her, she bit down into the soft flesh.
Blood instantly flowed into her mouth and before she could stop herself, she began lapping it up. She sucked hard and made circles on the man's neck with her tongue, nipping and biting at his flesh.
The taste surprised her. It was faintly metallic but had an overbearing essence of vitality. It coursed from the unfortunate man's body into her own and she enjoyed it. She enjoyed the warmth and the tingling sensation that it sent coursing through her entire being. She sucked and sucked until she realized there was nothing left.
She drew back breathless and looked at the sight before her. The man lay completely still, looking peaceful and at ease. Tears came to Hermione's eyes and she fled the brothel, flying at top speed into the countryside outside the village.
**
Hermione cried without reservation as she relived the horrible memory. Her troubled mind wandered to Harry and their encounter in his apartment. He had kissed her, fiercely, and with passion that had only ever been reserved for her. Memories of their life together through friendship and their short marriage, plagued her on the bank of the stream and she let herself go completely. She cried for everything. Her plague as a vampire, her lost hopes and dreams, but most of all she cried for Harry and the love for her that he had held onto for ten years.
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