A/N: This is the 2nd chapter uploaded today. Please read Chapter 4 first. Having no internet for 4 days and loads of free time gave way to writing <smiles happily>
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Chapter 5
It was stupid really; immature even. The whole argument had spiraled out of control so quickly that Ginny didn't know what Draco was thinking anymore. The past two weeks had been stressful, sad, angering…fake feeling. Marissa and Devon picked up on the briskness with which Ginny and Draco interacted and were crying more than usual about the simplest things. So, having had enough it was Hermione, along with Samantha, who came up with this celebration at the Malfoy's house in Spain. Their hope was that if they could bring Ginny and Draco an enjoyable time, have them actually touch each other and remember what it was like to enjoy each other's company, then maybe that would spark one of them to forget about being stubborn and begin talking to try and save their relationship.
"It can't be easy being married to Draco," Samantha murmured to Hermione as she nursed a glass of wine. "Hell, if I was her, I'd be ignoring his attitude and concentrating on Jacobo over there." Twin brown eyes swung over to the edge of the patio where the new neighbors were congregated. Jacobo was from Italy, and had brought his six year old daughter to the party; he was conveniently divorced and conveniently handsome.
"They still love each other; they are just at an impasse. For the first time in their relationship, Ginny did something he didn't want her to do," Hermione answered, letting her eyes rest on Jacobo for a moment, watching him talk to Ginny using hand gestures quite earnestly. "She did something she felt was right and Draco viewed her decision to not agree with him as saying that he was wrong; that what he has to say isn't important."
"What would've helped, you think?" Samantha asked, seeing Ron cross her line of vision and her stare at Jacobo was broken. She swung her eyes around searching for Draco. Coincidentally, or maybe not, he wasn't very far from Ginny, holding Devon and breaking apart a cookie for him to eat.
"I think if Ginny had sat down and told Draco the reasons why she bought that broom for Marissa then they could've come to an agreement. Or even shown him how talented she is on her training broom. But, knowing Draco Malfoy's pride, he isn't going to back down and tell her he's sorry; not until something threatens him or his relationship with her. Or someone can clue him into the fact he needs to see her side."
"Prat," Samantha sighed and her cousin silently agreed that each of them were acting like prats.
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Ginny listened with interest as Jacobo described the poor conditions that he was raised in and the countless excuses he made for his strange, magical behavior that none of his family showed before him. Ginny could hear Devon rattling on about the fake snitch Harry had given him the other day and knew Draco was behind her. She hadn't realized there was music being played, listening to Jacobo instead. She was made aware of the fact there was a slow song when he stopped in mid-sentence and glanced out to the dance floor.
"Would you care to dance?" he asked Ginny, holding out his hand in a very gentlemanly manner. Nodding silently, and knowing she'd get even more of a cold shoulder from Draco, she walked out to the middle of the patio, joining her friends and some casual acquaintances they had made on their numerous trips to Spain.
She filled Jacobo in on what it was like growing up in the Burrow and was about to launch into what it was like to degnome the garden when she saw Draco's finger tap her partner's shoulder.
"Mind if I dance with my wife?" he asked neutrally, but with a slight emphasis on "wife" that Ginny was, probably, exclusively aware of him saying. Jacobo let go of her hand, dropped his arm from her back and bowed, smiling, then turned and headed over to where his daughter was swinging from a play set.
Easily, Draco pulled Ginny towards him; his hand spanning her lower back and his other one wrapping around hers, tightly. She wasn't angry he interrupted her dance with Jacobo; if anything she was pleasantly surprised. It was the first emotion he had shown in what seemed like forever but the tense grip he kept on her hand didn't waver.
Knowing Draco as she did, she knew he wasn't expecting her to talk so she stayed quiet still playing around with the idea of telling him that all of this was her fault; that she'd find a new owner for the broom as soon as they got home. Although part of her resisted that idea; knowing that she had done what she felt was right but most likely not in the correct way.
"So," he began keeping their bodies a few inches apart and not looking directly at her. "Have a pleasant conversation with our new neighbor?"
"It was fine, thanks," Ginny responded softly, not answering him in the same sarcastic tone. She missed him and had done everything she could think of to get him to open up and respond to her. He had fallen asleep on the sofa more times than in their bed. They hadn't touched each other intimately in two weeks and her body was craving just a hug, a loving caress of her cheek…anything to let her know he missed "them" too.
"What were you talking about?" he pressed and Ginny answered promptly in the same soft tone hoping to break through whatever wall he had surrounded himself with. As they slowly turned to the music, she felt a pair of arms wrap around her knees, pushing her into Draco. Craning her neck over her shoulder, she was met with a miniature Draco smile and a pair of bright blue eyes.
"Mummy! Can I have another cookie? Devon too?" Marissa asked, now linking one arm through her father's knee and one arm through her mother's. Ginny smiled knowing her son put his sister up to this task. Draco answered first, echoing Ginny's thoughts.
"You may, but Devon has had three. Tell your Uncle Ron to not give him any either." And when Marissa let go, running back towards the house Ginny was acutely aware of her husband pressed up against her, his arm curved around her back protectively.
Draco's gaze had followed their daughter back toward the table near the house, making sure she listened to him and Ginny tried to slow her breathing, feeling her body and soul calling out to him in a pleasurable pain. She knew the moment he realized the safe distance he put between them had been compromised-his head had dropped almost imperceptibly and his hand tightened against her ribs.
Slowly he turned to look at her, their eyes meeting solidly and the array of emotions that she saw in them made her heart plummet to her feet. How could he hide his feelings so well, for so long, and now their simple touch dropped that wall they hid behind? Why couldn't he verbalize what he was feeling? The song ended and immediately, Ginny gathered up all her courage, dropped her hand from his grip and his shoulder and stepped back.
"I'm going to check on the kids," she whispered, tears suddenly springing to her eyes as she turned, his hand lingering for a moment on her hip until she was out of his reach.
"Ginny?" Hermione called out as she walked by. She set her drink down on the table and hurried after her, leaving Samantha in charge of Brian and James. Ginny had walked quickly away from Draco, after what Hermione had thought may be a breakthrough. She mentally made a note to have a series of slow songs played in a row after the next set. Following her towards the table and seeing Ginny check Marissa's plate and placing some cut up cucumber on her own, she watched her friend suddenly put the plate down then rub her temples.
"Ginny?" Hermione asked gently and stood next to her, watching her friend go from defeated and upset to standing straight and pushing down all her emotions.
"I'm fine, Hermione." Marissa scampered away for a moment and Hermione waited until she was out of earshot to talk.
"I don't believe that for a moment. You're depressed and that scares me." Hermione gave her friend a one armed hug. "If that song had just been longer," Hermione let her unsaid thought hang in the air.
"He would've stepped back, not wanting me to affect him in any way. He's still really angry, Hermione, and I have no idea how long it'll take him to forgive me."
"He shouldn't have to forgive you," Hermione said angrily and her friend paused, thinking, then nodded.
"I know that in my brain. I have tried to explain my reasoning to him, calmly, rationally, without children around but his response is always that stone cold expression on his face. I'm not sure how much longer I can take his…indifference," she chanced a look over Hermione's shoulder and saw Narcissa talking to Draco who looked a bit pissed off, actually.
"I think maybe there are just some Malfoy traits that you can't change. He feels you defied him and went out of your way to ridicule his thoughts."
"I didn't though, you know that. He is acting just like his father right now and that scares me." Ginny let her eyes drop as Draco looked in her direction, still talking with his mother and she turned her attention to Devon who was now standing next to her, holding Fleur's hand.
"I `zink he ez tired," Fleur smiled and Ginny couldn't help but to smile back, seeing Devon yawn widely.
"Thanks, Fleur. Come on Dev, let's go put you to bed."
"No," he protested blinking his hazel eyes rapidly as if thinking that would keep him awake.
"You and Marissa," Ginny reached out and snagged Marissa's arm as she tried to run by her mother. "Be back in a few, Hermione," Ginny said quickly, quelling any notions of Hermione trying to put her kids to bed. She didn't glance in any direction as she took Marissa's hand and forced her into the house, smiling wanly to Jacobo who was talking to Seamus. He had seemed glued to her side most of the night; definitely more so than Draco which was probably why he had actually chosen to dance with her. Jealousy was an emotion that Malfoys had issues dealing with.
Settling the kids down took a bit longer than she thought and after they had washed up, put on their summer pajama's and she had read them a book it was a good half hour until she bid them goodnight. Kissing their foreheads, she saw Devon's eyes close and stay that way. Marissa turned over in her toddler bed yawning widely.
"Your father and I will be outside if you need us," Ginny said quietly and saw her daughter nod, clutching her bear to her chest.
For a moment Ginny stood there watching her children fall into sleep. They rarely shared a room but since Ron's family, and Hermione's, was staying with them, they had to double up the children. Brian and James shared one room and were a lot harder to get quiet and to sleep. Jeremy was staying with Samantha's parents which freed up a lot of Ron and Samantha's time.
In just a few minutes, she saw their little shoulders rise and fall rhythmically and the love she had for them hit her hard. Her heart filled with happiness, thinking how lucky she was to have two healthy, beautiful children and she wondered what the future held for them. They had no idea, at this young age, they would never want for money or a roof over their heads, unlike Jacobo's upbringing. She heard a slight movement in the hallway and spun around, horrified for a moment that maybe he had followed her in here.
It was Draco, his tall frame filling the doorway bringing her back to her senses. Swiping at a stray tear she made a move to get past him, whispering they were asleep.
"Why are you crying?" he asked in a low voice as she shut the door. It wasn't "Have you been crying?" because he knew her too well to be confused with her emotions. Ginny lifted a shoulder in response knowing he wanted a verbal answer.
"I was just relishing in the fact we have two beautiful children. Just a mother's moment, that's all," she turned from him and stopped when she felt his hand clasp her elbow. Startled, she stopped at the top of the stairs and felt him slowly turn her to face him. Her heart thumped erratically in her chest, wondering what he was going to say. Her eyes flicked to his face, seeing dark smudges under his eyes that hadn't been there when they arrived in Spain. Quickly, she shifted them to Marissa's bedroom door.
"Why can't you look at me for more than two seconds?" he asked keeping his voice even-- a task Ginny knew wasn't easy for him at the moment. Every fiber in her wanted to retort, "Well, why do you think?!" but she searched for an answer Draco would understand and accept. The honest truth was the only answer.
"Because it hurts too much to see the lack of emotion in your eyes when you look at me," Ginny whispered, slightly surprised to see him shift his weight and drop his arm from her elbow; him fidgeting meant something had surprised him.
Thoughts ran through her head: `Don't you realize how you look at me? Wasn't that what you wanted me to see?'
She never received a response as she saw Ron coming up the stairs with Brian passed out on his shoulder and James sleepily walking up next to him.
"Devon's room?" Ron whispered and Ginny nodded, walking past Draco to open the door for her brother, thus pausing their conversation for the moment.
Walking back out to their expansive patio, Ginny noticed many of their guests with children were preparing to leave and her conversation with Draco was put on the back burner. He stood next to her, saying goodbye, shaking hands and soon it was just Ron, Samantha, Harry, Hermione, Fleur, Bill, Charlie, Katharine, Fred, Maggie, George, Lavender, Seamus and his wife Freesia along with Draco and Ginny. They sat around talking about Hogwarts, comparing notes about children, each sipping their favorite flavor of alcohol. Draco sat on the double swing next to her and occasionally bumped her as they shifted position. No one but Hermione and Samantha knew there was a rift between them as they managed to talk and insert a small laugh where appropriate. Waving her wand in the direction of someone's Muggle IPOD, Hermione set up a queue of slow songs and Ron and Samantha were the first ones up and dancing in a darkened corner of the patio.
Draco mentioned he thought he heard Devon and ducked into the house, leaving Ginny to dance with Seamus as Freesia was
nine months pregnant and not moving out of her chair. As the first song faded into the second, Seamus and Freesia left
and Ginny went in search of Draco, wondering if Devon was giving him a hard time or if it was just an excuse to not
dance. She found him walking up the stairs with a sleeping Devon in his arms. Quietly, Ginny turned back around running
full force into Hermione.
"Where is he?"
"Taking Devon upstairs."
"Harry is dancing with Samantha and she gave me this for you. Just arrived," Hermione held up a floral bag and Ginny peeked inside.
"A dress?"
"Apparently, you borrowed it last summer and loved it. She forgot to bring it with her this time and had Ron owl it over here. She wants you to have it for some reason. Go try it on and let me see it!" Hermione shoved the bag into her hands and a bit unsteadily made her way to the loo. Draco came back down and found his wife leaning against the wall waiting for Hermione. Pausing, wondering what she was up to, he saw Hermione come out and usher Ginny inside, both of the disappearing in there together.
"Why did they both go in there?" Ron asked coming back from checking on his son.
"Do we really want to know?" Draco gave a ghost of a smile.
"Did one of them have a bag?"
"Ginny did. Why do you ask?"
"Ah, it's a dress of Samantha's. Hermione heard how much Samantha loved it on Ginny and now she wants to see it. Apparently, Samantha doesn't like the color anymore and bought a new one."
"A dress."
"Yeah. Remember when Ginny came to visit for a weekend while you took the kids to your mother's to do something to her house? She borrowed it then when they went out. I'm hungry…is there any more food?"
Draco pointed to the fridge where Lavender and Katharine had stored most of the perishable food. Not wanting to seem like he was spying, Draco left and found a chair near the patio door, sat down and sipped on his beer while waiting for Ginny. Another set of slow songs started and Harry asked if anyone had seen Hermione.
"Loo," Draco answered and heard Harry let out a low whistle as he stepped into the kitchen.
Ginny blushed as Harry raised an eyebrow at her.
"Very nice, Ginny. Why did you change?"
"Why don't you compliment me like that?" Hermione challenged Harry giving him a pointed look, but her eyes danced as alcohol freed their restraint. Harry grinned at her.
"You know I like you better naked."
Hermione gasped and Ginny actually giggled as Harry shut his mouth, telling Ginny she looked nice once more, before he ducked into the loo himself.
Indeed when Ginny walked out onto the patio Draco caught a glimpse of her under the magical torches before Samantha descended. Indeed it was something different than she normally wore and after Samantha gave her seal of approval before being swept away by Fred for a dance, she turned and caught Draco's eye.
Again her eyes met his then looked past him at something in the shadows. The dress stirred memories of seeing her at Hogsmeade trying on dresses and he realized suddenly that this one was similar to that sixth year Christmas dance dress. Except this one was shorter--stopping right at her knees and had straps that graced her freckled shoulders. The hint of green that was in her Christmas dress shown among the blue as she moved away from the light and without realizing it he stood and followed her. The comment she made about how she couldn't look in his eyes bothered him and he realized he was feeling guilty. After exchanging words with his mother--about the fact that she thought he was acting immature and was potentially damaging a very precious relationship-- still rung in his ears.
"Ginny."
She stopped as she reached for her wine glass where they had been sitting and turned slowly taking her glass with her. She took a sip as she faced him, and then stared down into her glass waiting for him to say something.
"You look lovely," he said quietly and she felt her heart skip then settle back into its somewhat sluggish rhythm. She wasn't holding out much hope that he would do a one-eighty and she was tired of trying to figure out how to make him.
"Thank you. It was Samantha's," Ginny explained, lest he thought she was throwing money away for clothes she hardly wore. "Devon okay?"
"He's fine. One of his dreams," Draco answered his hand playing with some loose galleons in his pockets. Ginny nodded and took another sip hearing someone flip through the IPOD finding a song.
A slow chant-like refrain filled the air and Ginny heard the words, "Do you know where your heart is? Do you think you can find it?" float through the air to her ears. She had never heard this song before and for a minute she wondered if she had truly lost her heart as all Draco did was stand there, watching her.
Then without warning, he took the drink out of her hand, set it down and led her towards the edge of the patio. This time he gently took her in his arms, pressing her close to him so she had no choice but to lay her head on his shoulder. She turned her face into his neck lest anyone see the tears she knew were going to fall. The warmth of his body flowed into hers and as the words of the song swirled around them she could feel their broken connection beginning the process of re-healing.
"…Do you know where your love is?
Do you think you lost it?
You felt it so strong, but nothing's turned out how you want it
Well, bless my soul
Your lonely soul
`Cause you won't let go of anything you hold
Well, all I need is the air I breathe and a place to rest my head"
"Don't cry," Draco whispered in her ear, his hand rubbing her back tentatively as if this was the first time he had ever held her in his arms. "Please." His added plea at the end didn't help Ginny who felt the last two weeks of hell burst out of her. Her hands clutched his shoulders as she fought to stem the tears that were soaking his shirt.
"I'm sorry," she whispered and wasn't entirely sure he heard her. He moved them slowly around their patch of shadow waiting for her to stop trembling in his arms. His cheek pressed against the side of her head, his arms curved around her body, holding her to him possessively. Slowly, their feet stopped moving and Ginny pressed against him, trying to relish in the familiar firmness of his body, the safety of his arms, the smell of his soap and realized she missed more than she had ever imagined.
"Do you know where your fate is?
Are you trying to shake it?
You're doing your best dance, your best look
You're praying that you'll make it"
As Ginny lifted her head, wiping tears away with her hand she caught sight of Hermione leading Harry inside and it was then she realized they were alone on the patio. How they all moved away so quietly she'll never know.
"Sorry," Ginny apologized again, bringing up her other hand to wipe at her face. "I'm just tired," she added lamely feeling Draco pull away slowly, his hands on her hips.
"No, don't be sorry. Not about any of this," he began moving his hand off her hip for a moment as if to place it elsewhere. For a moment it hovered in the air, then settled back on her hip. Standing still Ginny stared at the ground, her hands to her face as she tried to regroup. Knowing he was waiting for her to look at him, she settled her hands on his arms, feeling the muscles quiver under her hands. Swallowing, she lifted her head until her eyes met his, and she struggled to not look away.
"…Do you think you can find it? Do you think you can find it better than you had it?
All I need is the air I breathe and a place to rest my head."
His eyes locked with hers in the semi-darkness and for a moment she wondered if he had read her thoughts from earlier. His hand lifted from her hip a second time, now brushing up her arm to her shoulder then he brought it to rest against her cheek. Goosebumps broke out at the soft touch and she struggled to keep her eyes locked with his.
"There is never a lack of emotion when I look at you. I want…I need you…to believe that. I thought you were looking away thinking I was going to read your thoughts without your permission." His voice was low, and she struggled to make it out between the words of the song that was coming to an end.
"…Do you know where the end is?
Do you think you can see it?
Well, until you get there, go on, go ahead and scream it
Just say…."
"No," Ginny shook her head, feeling his hand push slightly against her cheek. Something made her reach up and take his hand and press a kiss into his palm, closing her eyes as his hand curled around hers and tugged her towards him. Their hands pressed into her breast, near her heart as he tentatively brushed a kiss across her temple.
"I think we need to learn to talk more about our decisions and what our thought processes were towards them," Draco began his lips moving against her hair. Ginny nodded in agreement, her forehead rubbing against his soft shirt. Briefly she realized it was the one she bought him for Christmas her last year in school.
"I was angry because we had made the decision months earlier, together I thought, that we weren't going to get Marissa that broom. Then I come back from the store, still stressed over grading final exams, arms full of food and see Marissa suddenly fall off my broom to the ground and my first thought was "What did she hurt?" then when I saw she was okay anger set in about how she didn't listen to the rule we set up. Then on the heels of that you tell me you went ahead and bought her a broom…after I just saw her fall… ."
"I shouldn't have. I just saw the sale, saw it ended that night and figured I could talk you into believing me that she is ready. I would never put my daughter or son in harms way," Ginny explained trying to keep her voice steady. "I wasn't thinking that it would make you think I was questioning your authority or not respecting your thoughts. I do respect you. So much, Draco. I was just excited to get her onto a faster broom so we could actually fly with her." Lifting her head off his shoulder she briefly let go of his hand to swat at a mosquito.
His hands slid down to her shoulders, one thumb rubbing her collarbone that set off every nerve in Ginny's body. His lips pressed against her forehead and she tilted her head back, seeking his mouth. His lips touched hers and she felt a noise escape from the back of her throat as he pressed them softly to hers.
"I was a bastard, I'm sorry," he whispered against them, snaking an arm around her waist.
"I was inconsiderate and should've talked to you again so I'm sorry too." Her words came out fast as she twisted her arms around his neck, wanting every part of him pressing to her, filling the void she had been walking around with for two weeks. Despite the fact she could feel him hard against her, and knew he wanted her as much as she wanted him he found the strength somewhere to pull back. Inches away she could see the blue of his eyes pinning down her hazel ones.
"I love you. Ever second I look at you I know how lucky I am. There is never "no" emotion behind my eyes; that was just me trying to stay calm."
"Okay," Ginny breathed as his lips sought hers again, just as soft and shy as before. "Does this mean you'll sleep in our bed tonight?"
"If you'll have me," he gave a small smile as she nipped his bottom lip. Taking his hand in hers she led him inside dousing each light as she went with a wave of her hand. Somehow everyone made themselves scarce and their bedroom door was barely shut when she felt Draco's hands spin her towards him and this time, he went about her mouth in a much more aggressive way.
Draco hummed appreciatively as Ginny lifted her dress above her head feeling his hands touch what had just been covered. Falling back towards the bed she pulled him with her, hooking her foot in his shorts and helping him kick out of them. She let his arms guide her towards the center of the bed and cried out softly as he entered her. Words tumbled off her lips before she had a chance to think about them, mingling with his mouth.
"Gods, I missed you," Ginny arched towards him, feeling him sit back and grab her hips driving himself into her with a force she had never felt, causing her to cry out with a mixture of pain and pleasure. He curled an arm behind her and leaned down smothering her cries with his mouth, pushing her beyond her limits with bruising force.
"I'm so…so glad…," Ginny panted trying to force words beyond their mouths.
"What?" he asked roughly, his mouth sliding up to her temple as his thighs pushed against hers, stretching
her to her limits, forcing her to wrap her legs around his waist.
"So glad…you're…mine!" she gasped, crying out as he shifted his weight. Her hands flew to his thighs, wanting him to move faster, but wanting the bruising movements to cease at the same time. Her words had no thought, just feeling behind them and Draco drank those words in-- liking the claim they had on each other; knowing he could never live without her. The last two weeks showed him that.
"All yours," he panted against her lips feeling them open under his as her tremors surrounded him. Pulling back for one moment, wanting to see the love for him expressed on her face, he watched her eyes fly open and connect with his, stopping his heart for a moment with the possessiveness he saw in them. She pushed against him, wanting him to move, needing him to push one last time; throwing her over the edge her body was demanding to be taken.
"Take me," she whispered and he searched her eyes sliding against her, watching hazel eyes flutter but stay connected to his. Her hands dug into his biceps as he moved and she gasped out her next words. "With you."
He understood and pressing his forehead to hers pushed every emotion he was feeling deep into her mind, feeling her hands pull him towards her, nails digging into his back. Her legs suddenly locked with surprising strength around his, and she cried out his name, eyes closing for a moment then being forced open as his thoughts poured into her mind.
His timing was perfect; fastening his lips over hers and shifting his hips in a small movement, her breathy cries entered his mouth as they curled into one another; stress suddenly snapping free as they fought to extend the shudders that raced through their bodies and minds.
Languidly they sighed and slowly felt their limbs, bodies and souls relax against one another. As she let her fingertips trace the dip of Draco's back their conversation on the patio came back to her. She realized she never echoed his sentiment. Pressing her lips to his ear as he nuzzled her neck she whispered, "I love you. Always." She felt the first real smile of Draco's, in two weeks, curve against her shoulder.
"That could be a long time."
"Not longer than these last two weeks."
Nodding in agreement, Draco kissed her shoulder and slid off her, neither one giving a thought to what they should have learned way back in Astronomy class.
This year, the middle of July, when there was a full moon increased your chances of conceiving more than one child. And it wasn't until August when Ginny got to break the news to Draco that she was sure child number three was on the way.
At that point, she had no way of knowing it would be three on the way.
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A/N: the song they danced to was by "OneRepublic" called "Say (All I Need)". Awesome album; check it out on your favorite download site!
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