I would like to thank choccy2604 and Looney Warner Mouse for their reviews and for everyone who read this story. There will be other romances but they should't have a big impact on the story.
The noise made by hundreds of students talking, flooded the Great Hall and assaulted Harry's senses as he picked at his breakfast. He struggled to keep his eyes open; he'd managed to sleep the whole night through for once, but when he had woken up, he'd felt even more tired than when he'd went to sleep. He'd had another nightmare, but it hadn't woken him. He could remember seeing Voldemort in the now familiar blackness. They had just stood there for what had to have been the better part of five hours. They hadn't spoken, just stared at each other. Another odd thing about the dream had happened just before he'd woken up. He noticed a figure standing at the Dark Lord's side. The figure was little more than area of deeper blackness. There were no features to be seen only the vaguest hint of a human shape and what might have been the folds of a robe. It was difficult to judge height when he only had Voldemort's unnatural form to compare it against, but he guessed they were about his own height maybe an inch or so taller. He tried to get a closer look, but Ron had woken him up and the details were already slipping from his mind.
"Harry are you going to eat that bacon or just keep it pinned to the plate?" asked Hermione, snapping him out of his thoughts.
He looked up and saw the concern in her eyes and the guilt that had been building in the last week came crushing down on him. He hated not telling her about the nightmares, but he hadn't wanted to worry her, and then the longer he kept the secret the more afraid he became of her reaction.
"I'm just not hungry. Must have ate too much last night." Harry's tone was flat and hollow, even to his ears.
"Okay if you say so." Hermione's reply ripped his heart in two. He could tell from her tone that she didn't believe him, but the look in her eyes clearly said 'I trust you to tell me if any thing is wrong.'
Harry was about to reassure her when Professor McGonagall stood next to them handing out timetables. "Professor Dumbledore would like to see you three after your last class today. You know the way; the password is Dolly Mixture," said the professor in her usual stern tones.
"Do you know why, Professor?" asked Hermione.
"You'll find out when you get there, but don't worry, no one's in any trouble." Her voice was much softer and Harry thought that he even saw the barest hint of a smile cross her face before she continued handing out the timetables.
"What's the timetable like?" asked Ron who'd been quiet this long because, as usual, he'd been stuffing his face with food.
"Not bad. Could have been worse, but we have Divination first thing," said Harry as he continued to study the parchment. "What's yours like?" he asked looking at Hermione.
"Great. I've got double Arithmancy first thing." She was almost bouncing in her seat as she studied her timetable. "I better get my book's. I'll see you both in Charms." She gave Harry a quick kiss on the cheek before running off to get her books.
~ ~ ~
It was about five minutes after Hermione had left the Great Hall. Harry and Ron were making there way to Gryffindor tower to get their books when Ron asked the question. "Are you sure you're all right?"
"Why wouldn't I be?"
"Because you look like something Buckbeak dragged in, and you lied to Hermione. Again."
"I had another nightmare. I was 'talking' to Voldemort again."
During Harry's stay at the Burrow, Ron had found out that Harry had different types of nightmares. There was the normal ones, where he saw bad things happening to the people he loved. Then there was the visions, like the one he'd had the night before they left the Burrow, and finally there was the talking dreams. The talking dreams consisted of both Harry and You-Know-Who being together in a black void, usually alone, but sometimes others were there. Harry was convinced that he was actually speaking with You-Know-Who, some how the link they shared allowed them to speak. Ron believed Harry; but the problem was Harry's scar had only hurt when he'd had the vision about Karkaroff. It should have hurt when Who-Know-Who twisted Harry's dreams and when they talked, but it didn't.
"What did he say?" asked Ron with a tone that made it clear he didn't want to know, but had to ask.
"Nothing. That's what's strange; he just stared at me. And there was someone with him."
"Who?"
"I don't know; I only noticed them near the end. There was a dark shape next to him that looked like someone in black robes."
"So that's why you lied to Hermione. You better tell her the truth because I don't think she believed you."
"She didn't; I could see it in her eyes." Harry's tone was resigned as if he'd already decided that when he told Hermione the truth she wouldn't have anything to do with him.
"That's not good. You have to talk to her after we see Dumbledore because it'll be better if you tell her than if she find out some other way. And despite how I acted when you first told me about you two you really do need each other. I don't think I've ever seen you as happy as when you're with her, and she seems more…" Ron trailed off searching for the right word.
"More what?"
"I don't know. She's still the same person but something's changed. I'm not sure what."
They both lapsed into silence as they entered the common room and got there books. Even on the long trek to the North Tower for Divination they stayed silent; lost in there own thoughts. Harry was thinking about what he would say to Hermione, and Ron was hoping that Hermione would understand Harry's reasons because if they broke up he knew it would devastate both his friends.
~ ~ ~
The day raced by and it seemed like only minutes since he'd had lunch, but the ringing bell told him that double Transfiguration was finished and so was his day. He knew why the time had past so quickly; he was afraid of the talk he was going to have with Hermione.
"Do you think we should drop our things off in the tower or go straight to Dumbledore's office?" asked Ron as they walked out of the class room.
"Best go straight there. We've been carrying them around all day a little longer isn't going to kill you," said Hermione.
Ten minutes later they were standing in front of a familiar gargoyle.
"Dolly Mixture," said Harry to the statue that started to shuffle to its right as soon as Harry had spoke. The revolving stair case made the trip up to the Headmaster's office quick and easy. When they got to the top they found the door was open, and Dumbledore sitting behind his desk.
"Come in, it's good to see you all again." As he spoke a huge smile spread across his face. "Please sit down." The three of them sat down, but noticed that Dumbledore had lost his smile and was looking grim. That look surprised Ron and Hermione, but Harry had seen that look once before when Dumbledore had confronted the fake Moody. "I have asked you three here because I must ask a favor of you. War is coming and Voldemort's," Dumbledore's eyes flicked over to Ron as he shuddered at the mention of the Dark Lords name, "favorite weapon has always been fear. We need people to realize that he is an enemy that can be beaten. I've asked all the staff to use Voldemort's name if they ever have to talk about him to help remove some of the fear people have of him. And I'm asking you three to do the same. It is most important that you agree to this Mr. Weasley, you are wizard born and grow up in a world that refused to use Voldemort's name. If you have the courage to do this others may take heart."
Ron stared at the wall considering Dumbledore's words. It had taken all his control not to shout at the headmaster to stop using that name. Did he have the courage to say it? Harry always had, and he was sure Hermione, who only said You-Know-Who to blend in, would easily be able to stop. "I'll do my best Professor" Ron looked pale and a little shaken, but Harry and Hermione had both noticed the determination in his eyes.
"That is all I could ever ask for Mr. Weasley. Now I have something to ask of you Harry. You must stay out of trouble and try to stay calm. Until we get more evidence that Voldemort has returned, the only proof people have is our word, and the Ministry is using the Daily Prophet to discredit us both as much as possible. We can not afford to give them any new reasons. I know this is a lot to place on your shoulders, but lives depend on it. The more people that believe you; then the more prepared we will be when Voldemort strikes."
"Don't worry Professor; we'll keep him in line," said Hermione, with a grin that could only be called mischievous.
"I knew I could rely on you Miss Granger," said Dumbledore and the sparkle was back in his eyes. "Now if I could have a few minutes alone with Harry."
Hermione gave Harry's hand a quick squeeze as she left.
"You've been very quiet Harry..."
"I hadn't thought of it like that before. I never thought lives would depend on my not losing my temper. I didn't think that words in the Prophet about me could kill someone."
"The world can change or not with a word." Dumbledore opened a drawer and pulled out a large envelope and a copy of the Daily Prophet. He put the envelope on the desk and handed Harry the newspaper. "Words have power Harry; this is why your parents were killed and why Voldemort wants you dead."
Harry unfolded the paper and looked at the front page. It was dominated by a picture of his dad and a huge headline POTTER SPEAKS OUT. The entire article was about a speech his dad had given at the Ministry. "Our defenses are sound, our children are safe. Now is the time to take the fight to them. No more will we cower in fear, it's [ You-Know-Who's] turn to know the bitter taste of fear and defeat." Even now fifteen years later Harry felt his heart swell with pride.
"We had been fighting for decades and it was common knowledge that Voldemort feared me. My words no longer had the power to give people hope. How could I tell people to fight, they were scared and how could I know that fear? So your father spoke out and he gave people hope. In order to make your father's words out to be lies, Voldemort decided that if he killed you both and left your mother alive to spread her tale, then he would have broken our morale, but he didn't expect anyone to stay and die when they could run and live."
Now it made sense why Voldemort had hesitated to kill his mum; three dead bodies wasn't as frightening as a first hand account of The Dark Lord's power. "I understand now." His voice was small and hollow.
"Here this is from Sirius. Take it's warning seriously. Now I think it's best if you go and talk to your friends," Dumbledore's eyes twinkled as a small smile graced his lips as he added, "or perhaps just Miss Granger. If you want to talk my door is always open for you Harry."
"Thank you." Harry didn't known what to do; he'd wanted to know why his parents had died, and now he did he wasn't sure what to do, then Dumbledore's voice broke through the haze but all he could hear was "Miss Granger." How could he have been so stupid? First he had to talk to Hermione and then he would talk to Ron. As he walked to the door his mouth seemed to open with out him telling it to. "Karkaroff's dead. I saw it in a vision yesterday morning. Voldemort killed him." Harry was out the door and down the stair case before Dumbledore could say a word. He walked along the corridors with out seeing anything; his feet taking him to Gryffindor Tower without him thinking about it.
The common room was filled with noise as the younger students played games and the older one's talked about there homework, especially the fifth and seventh-years. Today was the first day of lessons but they had gotten a lot of homework because it was O.W.L year he could only imagine how much worse it was for the seventh-years taking their N.E.W.T's.
"Harry; you okay?" asked Ron.
"Not really. Where's Hermione?"
"In her dorm. You need to talk to her"
"Yeah."
"Okay; I'll ask Ginny to go and get her, and I'll take your stuff up for you."
"Thanks mate," said Harry with the first trace of a smile on his face Ron had seen since he came into the common room.
"No problem. You'll be at the lake?"
"Yeah." Harry's smile grew as he realized just how well they all knew each other.
He didn't have long to wait for Hermione to come down the stairs into the common room. Just seeing her calmed him down and made him feel better. The kiss they shared made him even happier. When they finally broke for air, Harry looked around, and saw nothing but a sea of heads that were definitely not looking at them. Nope, no one had been looking at Gryffindor's new prefect and their best Quidditch player snogging in the middle of the common room.
"Do you want to go for a walk around the lake?" asked a very breathless Harry.
"Sure." Hermione answered before she grabbed his hand and left the common room. As soon as the Fat Lady's portrait had closed the entire common room exploded with noise and more quietly was the small clinks of coins exchanging hands.
~ ~ ~
The sun hung large and bright in the sky; a fiery beacon proclaiming there was only a few hours of light left. As they walked around the lake Harry tried to sort his thoughts into order. He finally knew why his parents had died, but that wasn't the most important thing he needed to say. He'd lied to Hermione and made Ron do the same. In the grand scheme of life not telling Hermione the truth should rank low on his list of concerns, but it felt like the most important.
They were holding hands; Harry had never realized how much comfort that could give a person. Hermione didn't know what saw going on, but here she was giving him strength and ready to help him no matter what. He didn't deserve her. She had sacrificed for him, and in return he'd lied to her and put her in danger. He should try and end it; push her away and make her safe. But he was selfish; he didn't have the strength to do it. The joy of being with Hermione was slowly fading and in its wake the pain of his parents death was coming back. Only Hermione's presence was stopping him from breaking down in tears.
"I know why they were killed. That's what Dumbledore wanted to talk to me about. My dad said that we should fight back and make him taste defeat. Dumbledore said that it gave people hope to keep fighting and not give up."
"So You-… Voldemort killed them to make sure people would still fear him."
Harry's nod was the only answer she got, and the only one she needed.
"I know what he did was important, but I always thought the reason would be bigger. A speech and a story in the paper seem too small. To kill because of that seems so stupid," said Harry after a few minutes of silence. "There's something I need to tell you."
"What?" asked Hermione concerned by Harry's abrupt topic change, and the tone his voice had taken on.
"The nightmares are back. They started again that night we stayed at the Leaky Cauldron." Harry spoke with out looking up at Hermione. He was scared about what he would see in her eyes.
"Why didn't you tell me?" asked Hermione, her anger simmering just below the surface of her voice.
"I saw how much they hurt you the first time and they're even worse. I didn't want to worry you. You've always been there for me Hermione, always caring for me even when I didn't care. I just could put that pain back into your eyes. I wasn't strong enough to talk to you. As long as you didn't know the truth then somehow it wasn't real. I'm sorry Hermione; I should have talked to you as soon as they started, but you were so happy and carefree. I just couldn't bring myself to destroy it." Harry still hadn't looked at Hermione.
"When we started going out we didn't stop being friends; you can still talk to me. Didn't we agree to make the fear go away together? Now tell me everything."
Harry slowly lifted his head to look at Hermione; her face was a mixture of concern, hurt and anger. He began talking and with each word he felt the burden that had been sitting on his shoulders lift. He even talked a little about his parents, a subject he had avoided talking about for years. Just like the night when Hermione had first found out he was having more nightmares than usual; he felt better after talking with her. Harry cursed himself with the special set of insults he reserved exclusively for his own stupidity. He should have spoken with Hermione sooner, if he lost her as a friend because of this then it would be his own fault.
Harry had been talking for hours and night had descended without either of them noticing. Hermione had sat and listened as her best friend talk about the hell he had been going through alone each night. She was so angry with him for not telling her what was happing straight away, but at the same time she just wanted to hold him and tell him that everything would be ok. She understood his reasons, that he'd only wanted to stop her from worrying about him, but she felt betrayed. If he was keeping this from her what else could he be hiding?
"Harry, do you want to watch the stars with me?" asked Hermione knowing Harry would understand the true meaning of her words.
"I'd love to," said Harry understanding that this was Hermione's way of telling him he was forgiven. "Thank you," he whispered softly as they held hands and lay back to look at the sky.
"Don't do it again Harry; you hurt me and I can't go through that again. I wouldn't be able to forgive you a second time."
"I don't deserve your forgiveness this time, but I am thankful for it." Twenty minutes later Harry felt enough tension had been drained out of the atmosphere and he wanted to hear Hermione laugh. "Can I ask a question?"
"Of course."
"Which part of the 'Lets try and keep our relationship quiet' plan includes you snogging me senseless in the middle of the common room. Not that I'm complaining, just curious."
Hermione had to fight from laughing out loud at the way Harry described their kiss. "You looked like you could do with the cheering up and I don't give a damn what anyone says."
"Just seeing you made me feel better," said Harry after he had got his laughter under control. For the next few hours they simply sat and looked at the sky until Hermione dragged Harry back to the common room to do their homework.
~ ~ ~
The chaos of the common room had died down in the time Harry and Hermione had been away. The younger students had went to bed while the older one's were relaxing or trying to keep ahead of the punishing homework load they were sure to have. Ron had spent the first twenty minutes groveling to Hermione for not telling her about the nightmares. Harry could see that she had forgiven him in the first twenty seconds. Harry decided to read his letter from Sirius while Hermione did her Arithmancy homework and Ron played a game of chess with Dean. Harry opened the envelope to find a letter and a second sealed envelope inside.
Dear Harry
I hope you enjoyed your birthday but now it's time for the real present I promised you. In the other envelope you will find the guide that James and I wrote on how to become an Animagi. The process is both difficult and dangerous. My feelings are to try and keep you away from all dangers but I know can't do that. I offer you this chance so that you will have a surprise to use against your enemies. The dangers in becoming an Animagi are not trivial and there is no shame in choosing not to try. No matter what you decided you can't tell any one your decision. Any one that knows could have it tortured out of them, but they can't tell what they don't know. I suspect Dumbledore knows what is in this package so you must use all the precautions you can to keep your decision secret. I ask you to keep both this letter and the guide secret from everyone except Hermione and Ron. I don't have the heart to ask you to keep secrets from either of them and both of them could benefit from having a surprise up their sleeves.
Love Sirius
P.S. Dumbledore tells me your staying at Hermione's over the summer. If your reading this then your back at Hogwarts and if you haven't already then you should tell her how you feel. There will be enough regrets in the days to come don't add to them unless you must.
Harry had to wait until everyone except Ron and Hermione had left the common room. He had a talk with Ron explaining to him what Dumbledore had told him. Then he showed him the letter, Ron read it and then past it on to Hermione with out saying a word. She quickly read it and then looked up at the two boys. The silence stretched on each lost in their own thoughts.
"Okay," said Harry is voice sounding unnaturally loud in the quite room. "We have a choice; take the risk and become Animagi or do we destroy the guide because I don't think we should leave it lying around if we're not using it. So what are we going to do?"
Two hours later Harry slowly climbed the stairs to his dorm; He couldn't believe that this was still only his first full day back at Hogwarts. After what Dumbledore had told him, his discussion with Hermione and then arguing with both Ron and Hermione about what they should do he was more tired than he'd ever been in his live. He wasn't happy with the decision, but he knew it was the right one, but that didn't mean he had to like it.