Cruel Summer
James turned to the door, catching her gaze, and Lily blanched, twisting away from his shocked face. She slammed the door and fled down the stairs, rational thought leaving her mind.
James had frozen, not being able to move as his brain overloaded with thoughts.
How long had she been standing there?
Why was she watching me?
Oh my god! She was watching me!
The Marauder groaned into his hand and rubbed his eyes.
Why? Why did she have to see me now?
He sighed and got off of the bed, walking over to the drawers. Pulling out some of the Muggle clothes he had bought, he dressed quickly after using his wand to remove all the traces of his actions, thinking of ways that he could speak to her after this. He tried not to think of her never speaking to him again as he pulled on a pair of jeans, fastening them without really thinking about it.
James paused and ran over the situation in his mind, cringing slightly in embarrassment.
`What am I gonna do?' he whispered.
James reluctantly walked towards the door and opened it quietly, shutting it behind him. Cursing the creaky floorboards, he made his way down the stairs and stepped into the hall.
Sound was coming from the kitchen and he could tell it was her. She was washing the dishes, he realised as he walked into the room. Lily had her back to him, rapidly scouring the plates and trying to rid her mind of watch she'd just witnessed. She wouldn't have cared exactly if it hadn't affected her…and he didn't moan her na…
`Lily?'
SMASH
Lily dropped a china plate into the bowl and it smashed as it hit the others that were in there. Ignoring the broken plate, she paused, not turning to look at him. In fear that if she did, she might do something that she would…regret.
`Don't.' she whispered, `Please…just don't do this.'
James looked at the girl, her auburn hair shining in the light from the sun. He blinked and shook his head, trying to keep on the right track. Moving further in to the room, Lily straightened up, hearing his actions and keeping her guard.
`How long were you standing there?' he said softly.
Lily hissed to herself and shook her head slightly, as if trying to stop his voice penetrating her thoughts. Lily also didn't know the answer to his question. Time seemed insignificant while she was watching him, and she felt herself liquefy against the scrutiny of his gaze on her back.
Why is he doing this?
Does he enjoy seeing me like this?
Lily heard him shift behind her again, and she closed her eyes firmly. The vision wouldn't stop blurring her thoughts. It was as if it was burned into her retinas; like she'd stared at a light for too long and the picture was still visible when she looked away.
A hand touched her shoulder and she spun around to face the scruffy haired Marauder. Her breath caught in her throat as they looked at each other. James eyes searching her face and Lily's like a deer caught in the headlights.
`God, I want to kiss her,' he thought to himself.
But before he could lean in, she broke from his gaze and twisted out of the way of him. James looked at her as she eyed him cautiously.
`Lil…what are you doing?'
She folded her arms, bit her lip and shrugged in his direction. Lily literally didn't know, she had never been in this situation before and she decided that she didn't like the uneasy feeling that it caused.
She could feel his gaze on her, and somewhere in her mind, she could hear him moaning her name over and over.
Oh god!
Lily looked at him again, his black hair falling scruffily over his head and his blue eyes under thick lashes, piercing hers. She had to look away again. She couldn't stand this.
`Did you like watching me?'
A hot flush spread over her cheeks and she looked down at the floor. Lily heard him chuckle, moving towards her, and she frowned slightly. He was in front of her before she realised and she looked up into his face, his eyes now dark with lust and roaming over her body, slowly drinking in the sight of her.
Lily knew that look as it passed over her chest and down to her bare legs; she knew that he was mentally undressing her.
She was going to put a stop to it.
Before James knew what she had done, Lily had pulled her wand out and was aiming it at his throat.
`W-wha…' he spluttered.
`Listen.' she growled, holding her wand steady, `You were right about me…that I liked to watch it…but that's where it stops James Potter! I don't know what's going through your twisted little mind but it's sure as hell not going to happen!'
Lily paused, glaring at his staggered expression and moved out of his way, moving out of the kitchen.
************************
A week passed by with James and Lily staying fairly out of each others way. They had come to realise that by not talking or arguing, kept them reasonably at distance of each other, which came gladly to Lily. She wanted nothing more than to forget completely James' little bedroom incident and pretending he wasn't there did help a little.
But it didn't stop the dreams.
A couple of nights ago, she had had a very vivid dream of him. But this one included her for some reason, but not her real self. It was as if she was watching the display on the other side of the room. No matter how much she tried to stop her other self, there was no change. Lily also found that she couldn't stop watching the other Lily and James either.
The real Lily had woken up in a cold sweat, her legs tangled in the bed sheets and her pillow somehow on the floor of her room. The dream had really freaked her out and she was scared of going back to sleep, unsure if it would repeat itself. This had happened on many occasions throughout the week and she was starting to get annoyed. It wasn't that she didn't enjoy them; it was because she did, and these feelings were strange and alien to her, as it was him she was dreaming about.
Why can't everything go back to normal? Why can't he just hate me again?
But what she didn't realise was that James did hate her, he hated her with a passion so strong, it was liable to explode every time he was near her. However, this was a different hate to the one he felt before. He hated her because she hated him. James knew it didn't make any sense, but what does in this life? She rejected him, so for this he hated her more than ever before, and he also felt that it was more dangerous than before too.
But for James, the dreams were a god send. It was the only way he could have her the way he wanted and with her consent. It was also a way to rid himself of the knot of sexual frustration that coiled inside him every time he caught sight of her. James was slowly driving himself insane, but Lily was totally ignoring him. Since the event in the kitchen, she had kept to murmuring 1 syllable phrases or words, and this was only in the extreme cases if she had to engage in conversation with him.
Lily had decided to do some spring cleaning for her Mother and Father seeing as there was nothing else better to do anyway. With Petunia refusing to return home, her Mother really needed some stress relief. Her and her Father had gone out that night seeing as it was the end of the week. They often spent time alone. The quietness of an empty house and cleaning also helped Lily's mind from straying to a certain black haired boy and she appreciated it immensely. He'd been plaguing her mind constantly and she'd just managed to get him out. This was not a good time for James to waltz into the room. But naturally, he did.
He stopped quickly, however, when he caught sight of her bent over the coffee table, and his brain forgot to from words as he mumbled something intelligible.
Lily turned quickly after she realised he was there and snarled, `What?'
James looked away quickly and took a deep breath. He knew he had to ask her, and since it was tonight that he wanted Sirius over, so he better ask her before he turned up.
He met her scowl, `Erm…Lil…can you do me a favour?'
He was trying to do his best and talk suitably, but his words managed to have a small strangled sound when he said her name. Lily frowned and narrowed her eyes at the shifty looking Gryffindor.
`What?'
Pleased that it had gotten this far, James continued, `Well, erm…I wondered if you would erm…allow me to have someone over.'
Lily paused and stood up, her eyes never moving from their fixed contortion of distain, `Who is this person then?'
`Padfoot,' he said gently.
`Why? So you could trash my house again? I don't think so James!'
`We won't trash it!'
`Yeah right,' she muttered and turned away.
`Please…I promise we won't.'
Lily stopped, folded her arms and looked at him. He had that puppy-dog look on his face, and she glared back at him; wiping it off quickly. She decided how pathetic he looked standing there, pleading with her. Lily didn't want Sirius around her house again; he was so utterly clueless about the Muggle way of life.
I mean, James is too, but Sirius takes it to extremes!
She realised in that split second that, that's how he is about everything. Makes sense.
Pausing for a second, she spoke, `Fine, I'll let him come over…but with one condition…Remus comes over too. He's the only one that can control both of you when I'm not there. And he has the most manners.'
James felt like telling her that Moony wasn't just books and homework like she made out, but he refrained from that quickly.
`Great!' he beamed, `They'll be coming over in a couple of hours.'
Ok. Ok. Don't get mad. Of course, it figures that he went and asked them anyway even if he hadn't asked her yet. It's obvious. It's James for God sake!
`You…you already invited them?'
Shit! Shit!
James looked at her, `Erm…'
Lily turned and walked into the lounge, cutting him off mid-sentence; she knew all of what he was going to say and she didn't want to hear it.
****************************
James was right about Sirius being a couple of hours. He turned up on the doorstep, ringing the bell constantly, the novelty apparently not wearing off. That was the first sign to Lily that it was going to be a long night. Remus had apperated in just over half an hour later, bringing a bottle of Firewhiskey with him. Lily frowned as he handed her the wizard alcohol, thinking he was the least person she would have thought to bring this.
Lily wasn't arguing that he had though. He could take over the baby sitting for a while, while she poured whiskey down her throat.
Before he had arrived, she'd had to sit through, what seemed like hours of pranks, jokes, teases, jeers and worse of all an awful game show on TV that Sirius and James thought was the best thing that existed on the planet. They had sat there, making up their own ridiculous answers to the Muggle questions.
Unscrewing the cap on the glass bottle and taking a large gulp, she flopped down onto the sofa again and eyeing the three Marauders with the look of a thousand daggers.
`Hey Evans, what is this?'
Sirius' question prompted her to focus her attention onto the Television screen. The screeches and shouts of people on the stands, flags and banners everywhere, and little people running on the screen, it could only mean one thing.
`It's a Football Match,' she said lazily.
Sirius looked back at the screen and raised his eyebrows, `It's kinda like a Quidditch Match.'
Lily glared in his direction, `It's nothing like a Quidditch Match!'
`Course it is! Well, `cept for brooms, but you've still have to get the ball into the hoop.'
She rolled her eyes, `What about bludgers…the snitch…seekers…and the fact that it's in the air?'
Sirius sneered at her and turned back to the screen.
`Prongs, could still manage to flatten those guys, even without a broomstick! Look at them, they run like Crabbe and Goyle!'
Lily tuned the voices out of her living room, preferring her own little world. She took another long sip of the Firewhiskey, feeling it burn a trail of flames down her throat and into her stomach. The heat felt soothing, it took her away like she wanted, drowned out the Marauders until they were like that faint ringing in your ears after you've spent a night out at a club.
She rested her head against the cushions on the sofa and thought about the new year at Hogwarts. She was going to be Head Girl; it was her dream-come-true ever since she read about it in Hogwarts, A History. She had worked so hard for the admirable title. And the new Head Girl was sitting on a Muggle couch in Surrey, drinking Firewhiskey and listening to the most idiotic boys in Hogwarts comparing Football to Quidditch!
Lily groaned and looked back at the three Gryffindor's, downing another mouthful of the disgusting drink. Remus looked at her as she swallowed it.
`Are you gonna drink all that Lil?'
James and Sirius looked at her. The drink had made a pink tinge brush her normally pale cheeks and give her sweet, innocent look.
`Shut up Remus,' she murmured.
Sirius chuckled at her, `Aww does Lilykins want to drink with the big boys?'
Lily shifted her gaze over to his face, `Big boys? You obviously think high of yourself.'
`Ouch,' he grinned, his dark eyes glittering with amusement, `the kitten still has claws…even after a few drinks.'
Lily's glare became more fixed as she looked at him, `Keep talking and I might let you feel them.'
`Anytime baby,' he smirked, patting his lap.
She rolled her eyes and glanced at James. His expression surprised her. It was one of complete anger, his jaw was set and she could nearly feel the pulse in his temple, throbbing inside his head.
She looked back at Sirius who was still watching her, a grin touching his lips.
`Whatever Sirius, like hell I'd even let you.'
Not moving his gaze from hers, he whispered, `Spoilsport.'
Lily wrenched her eyes away from his and looked at the glass bottle in her hands; it suddenly becoming very interesting. Sirius was making her feel strange, his lingering looks was making her skin feel hot under her clothes. It wanted her to rid herself of them.
Maybe it's the Firewhiskey. It can't be real. It wouldn't be. I don't like Sirius like that…do I?
Lily sneaked a look at them all; Remus was looking back at the TV, James seemed to be doing the same although the rage still flicked over his features. When she looked at Sirius, she blanched. He was looking at her, his eyes hooded with desire, and when he caught her looking, he ran his tongue over his lips suggestively.
Oh. My. God!
He smirked silently at the conflict in her mind, running his gaze over her bare legs to where they disappeared under her skirt.
`Mmm, god she looks so good,' he thought as he watched her shift in her seat, the result from his uncomfortable stares.
Lily tried to keep her focus on the tedious television program, but her body seemed to be thinking something else. She could feel it every time he glanced at her out of the corner of his eye. She felt it every time his eyes burnt into her. She felt exposed…naked even. Naked to his willing stares.
I have to get out of here.
Lily plucked up the courage to stand up from the sofa. Where the Firewhiskey had travelled through her body, it had rooted itself in her legs and when she stood she stumbled a bit. Both Remus and Sirius went to grab her, to stop her falling but she flapped them away. She was a little surprised that James didn't, but she thought nothing really about it as he kept his eyes fixed on the large TV. She felt Sirius' gaze on her legs as she walked out of the room and made a mental note to herself never to wear miniskirts again if she saw him.
Retreating into the safety of the kitchen, she walked over to the worktop, placed the bottle onto it and rubbed her eyes.
`What time is it?' she thought as she looked at the old rural clock that hung above the sink.
It read 9.40 nearly.
God, how did it get so late?
Lily walked back to the kitchen table; she could still hear the Muggle program. It was filling the silence of the room easily; taking form over the absence of speech. She was glad that she wasn't still in the room with them. Sirius was seriously making her uncomfortable. Lily didn't know why she was bothered about it so much. She had had guys look at her before obviously, but she couldn't place her finger on what the problem really was. Maybe it was the alcohol…she seemed to be blaming a lot of things on that tonight. It was a convenient excuse.
All she knew that whatever Sirius was giving, despite what she had said, she was willing to take, and that scared her most of all.
`What am I going to do?' she said, her head in her hands, `I'm so twisted.'
Silence answered her question.
`I'm going to the bathroom,' a voice said in the lounge.
Who's that?
Lily looked up, waiting to see the person round the corner and go up the stairs. There was a pause before she saw him. Sirius rounded the corner…but he didn't go up the stairs…he was coming straight towards her.
Lily watched in slow motion as Sirius' tall, smirking form walked down the hall towards the kitchen. Towards her. She backed away as he stepped into the kitchen, his dark eyes following her movements.
`Lil.'
She knew it wasn't a question. The Marauder advanced on her until she had her back against the work surface and his body inches from hers. Her large emerald eyes wide as realisation dawned on her. Sirius kept glancing between her lips and her eyes, licking his own lips absentmindedly as in preparation. Lily glanced over his face, his black hair framing his equally dark features. His dark eyes, that were getting closer to hers as he moved into her face.
Lily didn't know what to do. She knew what was going to happen but she was powerless to stop it. He had some kind of hold over her. A hold that when his fingertips brushed over the soft skin of her arms, she whimpered as shocks ran through her veins. A hold that made her slide her arms up his firm chest, to grasp his strong shoulders. A hold that when he pressed her against the work surface, she wound her fingers into his hair and he pressed his lips hot against hers. Sirius' hands gripped her hips and slid around her waist, caressing the soft skin on the small of her back and making her moan into his mouth.
Lily felt fire lick her skin as his touch moved up under her shirt then down again, into the waistband of her miniskirt. She heard incoherent moans escape her swollen lips as the Marauder moved his hands down her smooth thighs then up, raising the small skirt until it was bunched at her waist.
`Sirius…'she breathed, `please…'
The Head Girl didn't exactly know what she was pleading him for but when his soft, smooth lips passed to her ear then down her throat, she knew he wouldn't disappoint. Tilting her head back, she held his shoulders harder, pressing her hips deeper into his and feeling exactly what she was pleading for.
My god!
She swallowed in anticipation and looked back at him. Sirius ran his hands over the sinewy body in his possession. She was so hot against him. It was like someone had turned the heat up and the heat of their bodies was just adding to the intensity. He couldn't stand it anymore, he needed to be inside her, and her emerald eyes, hazed with lust, were driving him insane.
Before he though it could get any crazier, he felt a small hand press against the fastening of his Muggle jeans. It nearly blew his mind when he realised what it was, and what she was doing. He held on tight to her waist and let his forehead rest on her shoulder.
Lily pulled the zip down, unfastened them and slid her hand in gently. She heard the low moans rumble in his throat and felt the vibrations though her shoulder.
`Uhh…god…Lil.'
She weaved her left hand back into his hair and gripped his straining manhood in her right. Stroking gently, she trailed fluttery kisses over his jaw bone, licking gently every now and again.
God he's so hard!
Her own thought made the hotness rush through her body again, and her mind flicked back to James. Closing her eyes in concentration, she changed her technique to what she witnessed James doing. It seemed to work as Sirius moved off her shoulder, pressing his length into her and contorting his facial expression, whimpers escaping his throat.
His grip on her waist tightened and he started to thrust his hips against her. He knew that if he didn't stop her, the show would be over extremely soon. Grabbing her wrist, he pulled her hand out of his jeans, and groaned at the lack of contact.
`Sirius…'
Sirius swept his eyes over her confused but equally flushed face. He latched on to her red lips, manipulating them fiercely with his own, resulting in breathy gasps passing across their connection. He grasped the tops of her thighs, pulling her up and around his waist. The feel of her hotness firm against his crotch was sending him into orbit and was not helping him keep his mind on trying to find the kitchen table.
Determination took over, and he pushed her down onto the solid oak table. Sirius stood between her legs, grabbing her sweater and pulling it over her head and away from her body, leaving her in a lacy black bra. His eyes roamed over her fair skin, down her stomach, then up again, stopping at her chest. Lily was so beautiful to him, her whole innocent demeanour just a façade to allow people to see her as a `proper lady'.
`Yeah right,' Sirius thought, smirking at her as her skin contrasted to the wood, her scarlet hair splayed out around her face.
He slid his touch up her body, where he grazed his fingers over the lace of her bra. Lily closed her eyes and sighed, the faint touch provoking endless amounts of nerves and setting a buzz of electricity through her. She arched up into his palm, moans trickling through her lips a lot easier now, and Sirius' touch increasing with intensity.
`Mmm…yes…Sirius please…'
Sirius hooked his hands under her knees, pulling her tight against him. Their movements were becoming furious and unpredictable. Lily was pressing her hips against his and rocking gently; knowing it would drive him crazy. His fingers were biting into the soft flesh of her thighs and she knew there would be bruises, but neither of them cared.
Sirius pushed her skirt down her legs rapidly, it pooling on the floor as he grabbed her matching lacy knickers and ripped them from her body.
Lily gasped as he slid his finger over her wetness and plunged his fingers inside her.
Oh My God!
`Mmmm…Sirius…'
He watched her intently, the expression on her face as beautiful as her. Her moans giving him shreds of pleasure as they filled his ears.
`Ready Lil?'
She nodded erratically and he pushed his jeans over his hips.
Lily took in the sight of him before he pressed himself against her.
Then she could feel him, pressing against her opening. She wanted it more than anything.
Please Sirius…don't stop…
His eyes locked onto hers.
Black meeting emerald and fusing as one.
He pressed his lips against hers, heat forming a haze over them, ready to push inside her.
Needing it.
`WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?'
Sirius nearly broke his neck when turning to see who the voice belonged to. Both he and Lily looked at the doorway.
James and Remus both staring at them; confusion covered Remus' face, pure hatred and rage on James'.
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