Unofficial Portkey Archive

Chapter 22

It's You

"If tomorrow never comes
I would want just one thing
I would tell it to the stars and the sun
I would write it for the world to see
And it's you
The light changes when you're in the room
Oh it's you
Oh it's you

Oh it's you
Oh it's you
Oh it's you
Oh it's you.."

(It's You, by Michelle Branch)

Hermione awoke in the middle of the night and try as she might; she wasn't able to get back to sleep. She looked at the beautiful silver ring on her finger and felt an overwhelming sense of disbelief. She turned her head slightly to get a glimpse of her sleeping husband. Husband! She had a husband. Not only that, she was someone's wife.

If someone had told her a few weeks ago that this was how all of this would play out, she'd have laughed in their face. Yet, here she was. Her life, as she had known it, had been uprooted and turned upside down. She didn't know it was possible to experience every known emotion on the human emotional scale in such a short period of time. Through it all, there had been one constant---Harry. He had been there for her, holding her hand every step of the way. Even when she didn't know him, she knew he was out there, looking for her and holding on to her memory in his heart. He was what she had wanted and needed all this time. He was here. He was with her. And a few hours ago, he'd promised to never leave her side.

And here she was, happy. Happy was an understatement, she couldn't help musing to herself. She was…well, she didn't rightly know a word that could do it justice. This felt right. This felt like what she'd been waiting for her whole life.

Yet, she couldn't shake the overwhelming scared feeling that had been with her all this time. She hadn't told anyone this, not even Harry. She was scared. As the hours dwindled away, the feelings only got stronger.

Fate couldn't be this cruel, could it? How could she finally have everything she'd always wanted, only to be on the verge of having it all slip away? She cursed herself for thinking this way. She'd put on a brave face for everyone. She told them all---her parents, Harry, Ron and Kit, Billie and Sirius---that this potion would do the trick. She was the one telling them to have faith that it would work and everything would be like it was. That was what they all wanted to hear and it was what she so desperately wanted to believe.

Yet, lying here, she had so many doubts. There was a good chance that it might not work.

Why couldn't time stand still? In just a few short hours, she'd be back at St. Mungo's taking a potion that could allow her to reclaim her memories and her life, or she'd be condemning herself to a life that she wouldn't want to live. A pang of guilt hit her suddenly as she looked at Harry, lying peacefully, happily beside her. What had she done to him? If this didn't work, he would have married a woman he had no chance of a life with. Yet, she hadn't even thought of that. She'd been so happy and surprised when he'd proposed. She hadn't even stopped to think of anything but her own happiness. How could she have been so selfish? She lightly lifted Harry's arm from her waist and slid out from under the warmth of the sheets and duvet.

She picked up Harry's dress shirt from the floor and slipped it on. Fresh tears stung at her eyes. She curled up on the sofa in the suite and sat there, staring off into space. She had no idea how long she'd been sitting there when a hoarse voice called out to her.

"Hermione?"

She looked up to see Harry, with nothing but his boxer shorts on, staring at her myopically.

"What are you doing out here?" he asked, rubbing his eyes sleepily. "I woke up and you were gone."

She turned her head away and quickly wiped a tear from her cheek. She said a silent prayer that he hadn't seen her crying.

"I just-", she began, but her voice trailed off.

Within moments, Harry had crossed the room and took her in his arms.

"What is it, sweetheart?" he asked, rubbing her back. "Come on. It's okay. You can tell me."

"We shouldn't have gotten married, Harry," she finally managed to whisper.

"What?" he asked, staring at her, taken aback.

"We shouldn't have gotten married," Hermione repeated. "If this doesn't work tomorrow, have you even thought about the consequences? I don't want you to spend the rest of your life, sitting at my bedside as I stare out into space, not knowing you or myself or anything."

"Hermione," Harry said, cupping her face in his hands. "Did you listen to the vows I made to you?"

"Well, of course I did," she said. "I listened to every word."

"Well, do you remember the part when I told you I would 'love you, comfort you, and keep you for better or for worse, in sickness and in health'…any word of that ringing a bell for you?"

"Yes," she said, looking into his green eyes.

"Well, I've never been one to break promises, especially to someone I love more than life itself," Harry said, taking her hand. "When I said that, I meant that."

"But, Harry," Hermione protested. "I was so selfish. I didn't think of any of this before the ceremony. How could I have done this to you? Now you're stuck in a marriage with someone who could be a vegetable for all intents and purposes tomorrow."

Harry couldn't believe he was hearing her right.

"Hermione," Harry said, almost at a loss for what to say. "First of all, you are the most unselfish person I know in my entire life. You care so much about everyone and everything. It's one of the many things I love about you."

She smiled at him.

"Secondly, when you ask me how you could have done this to me? I have to agree with you," he said.

She looked up in surprise.

"How could you have saved my life time and time again? How could you have been the most beautiful, sweetest and smartest and charming person I've ever met? How could you have made me love you so much I can't even see straight? I don't know how you did it, but you did. You're a part of me and I'm a part of you. I have never regretted anything we've done together or any moment that we've shared together. And I never will regret it. So, as depressing as it may be, Miss Granger, you're stuck with me for the next fifty or sixty years."

He looked into her brown eyes and took his hand to her cheek and pulled her in for a sweet kiss.

"That's Mrs. Potter now. Thank you, very much," she said cheekily.

"I love you," he said, resting his forehead against hers. "That's for always and that's forever. Nothing will ever change that. Nothing."

"I love you, too," she whispered.

"That's what I wanted to hear," he said, smiling at her. "Now, if I'm not mistaken, we are still on our honeymoon, correct?"

"Yes," she said, laughing.

"Well, what are we doing out here?" he asked her. "There's that big, comfortable, warm bed in there."

"Yes, there is," she said, taking his hand.

"It would be shame to waste it, don't you think?" he asked, winking at her.

"Terrible shame," she said, as she raced him back to the bedroom.

*********************************************************

By the next morning, Hermione still felt scared, but was resigned to what she was about to do. She and Harry had a quick breakfast and after checking out of the hotel, made their way back to the hospital.

Hermione's parents, Billie and Sirius, Kit and Ron, and the other Weasleys (save for Charlie and Bill, who were out of the country, but had sent their best wishes) were all present and accounted for.

Sean, Hermione's healer, came out of the back room, accompanied by Professor Snape, who looked as surly and intimidating as ever.

"Well," Sean said. "I think we've prepared everything. Are you ready to go?"

Hermione didn't know how she'd be able to stand, her knees felt like jelly. Holding on to Harry's hand, she managed to get to her feet. She didn't speak to Sean, only nodded her head.

"Okay," he said. "The procedure will be painless for Hermione. She won't feel any pain or discomfort. From what Professor Snape has told me, she will drink the potion and will fall under a deep sleep. We will not know how long she will be asleep for, it's varied in all of his experiments."

"Can we go back there with her?" Karen asked.

Sean nodded. "Only two at a time, I'm afraid. Hospital procedure."

Robert stepped forward. "I think Karen and Harry should be with her."

Hermione looked up in surprise. This man was surprising her all the time now. She expected he would want to be one of the ones to accompany her to her room.

"Not that I don't want to be there with you, but I think this is how it should be," Robert said, looking meaningfully at Harry. "She is your wife, after all."

"Thank you," Harry said.

"Right, then," Sean said. "Hermione, let's get you ready, then."

Hermione nodded and turned to her friends and family. She gave them each a hug and tried to keep her emotions in check as she listened to them all wish her well and good luck.

She took Harry's hand as they walked the long corridor with her mother and Sean and Snape to her room.

"Please let this work," she whispered under her breath. "Please let this work."

Harry came back into the waiting room a couple of hours later, followed by Karen. They both looked tired and drained as they came back into the room.

"How is she?" Molly asked.

"Asleep," Karen said, giving Molly a hug. "All that's left now is to wait."

Robert stood up. "Would it be alright if I went back there now?"

Harry nodded. "I'm sure she'd like that."

Karen smiled at Billie. "Why don't you go with Robert, Billie?"

"Are you sure?" Billie asked, getting to her feet.

Karen smiled and nodded.

Billie and Robert walked away and toward Hermione's room as Harry took a seat on the sofa beside Ron and Kit.

"Karen," Molly said. "How about you and Arthur and I go get some tea? You look like you could use it."

"I would love that," Karen said. "Harry, if anything happens?"

"I'll come and get you straightaway," Harry said, giving her a slight smile.

"Thanks," she said.

When Arthur, Molly and Karen were gone, Ron told Harry that Fred and George had to get back to the shop, but promised to come back later. Ginny had to check in with her office and had volunteered to bring them all back some lunch.

"That's really nice of her," Harry said. "But, I don't think I could eat. I feel sick to my stomach."

Kit looked at Harry sympathetically. "Is she really doing okay?"

"I don't know," Harry said. "She just looks as if she's taking a long nap."

No one knew what to say. Ron knew Harry well enough by now to know when to let things go and not push the issue. This was one of those times. Ron sat all the way back on the sofa. Kit rested her head on her husband's shoulder.

They sat there in silence until they heard the sound of footsteps approaching them. Harry looked up in surprise to see Maggie McCall walking nervously toward them.

It had been months since he'd seen her. He'd treated her badly and the full realization of what he'd done to her hit him as he looked at her. He hadn't even thought about her throughout any of this.

"Hi," she said softly.

"Maggie," Ron said. "Fancy seeing you here."

Kit punched her husband on the arm.

"What?" Ron asked.

Kit didn't answer him; she only rolled her eyes.

"Why don't we go and get something to eat down in the cafeteria?" Kit asked. "I'm craving some kippers right about now."

"You don't even like kippers," Ron said, his eyes still fixed on Maggie and Harry.

"I do now," Kit said; her eyebrows were raised at her husband, who was totally clueless to Kit's hints to give Harry and Maggie some privacy.

"Ronald Weasley!" Kit said, getting to her feet. "If you don't take me to the cafeteria downstairs right now and go with me to get kippers, I'm going to make your life a living hell."

Ron stared at her, openmouthed.

"And you know I can do it," Kit said, her voice saccharin sweet.

"Yes, dear," Ron said, finally getting the point. "We'll just be downstairs."

Harry nodded. "I'll have someone come and get you if anything happens."

"Thanks," Ron said. Before walking away with Kit, he mouthed the words "Good luck" to Harry.

With Kit and Ron gone, Harry and Maggie were alone in the waiting room. Neither of them really knew what to say. Maggie hesitated a moment before taking a seat beside Harry.

"So, how've you been?" Harry finally asked. It was a stupid thing to say, but it was honestly the only thing he could think of to say.

Maggie looked a little taken aback by the question, but she gave a slight smile.

"Alright," she said softly. "I heard about your wedding. I guess congratulations are in order."

"I'm sorry, Maggie," Harry said truthfully. "I know that it doesn't begin to make up for how I treated you, but I truly am sorry. You have every right to be angry with me and hate my guts and want to curse me into oblivion."

Maggie laughed. "Don't think I haven't thought about it."

Harry gave a slight chuckle at this.

"How is she--Hermione?" Maggie asked. "Arthur told me about what was happening."

"I should have told you," Harry said guiltily. "I should have told you a lot of things."

"Yes, you should have," she said. "But you have been a little preoccupied. It's not every day the love of your life returns from the dead."

Harry couldn't look at her. He felt like a piece of shit.

"I'm sorry," he said, looking down at the floor.

"You said that," she said. "I know you are, Harry. I know I should hate you, but I don't think I could ever do that. I won't lie to you, I wish things could have played out differently, but I think everything happens for a reason. You and I weren't really meant to be. You're where you belong. You're with who you should be with. I don't think I ever stood a chance."

Harry was silent.

"I don't blame you. I really don't. I knew what I was getting myself into when we started dating. I heard all the stories about the mythical love of Harry Potter and Hermione Granger. I wasn't deluding myself into thinking I could ever take her place. I just wanted to have my own place in your heart."

"You did," Harry said, looking up at her finally. "You did have a place in my heart."

"No," she said, shaking her head. "How could I? It all belonged to Hermione Granger."

"I never meant to hurt you," Harry said. "Geez, I feel as I'm just spouting out all the clichés that blokes say when they break up with someone. I wish I knew what to say to you."

"It's okay," she said. "There is no perfect way to break someone's heart. And you forgot to say that you hoped that we'd always be friends and that someday we'd be able to look back on all this and laugh."

"Yeah," Harry said, smiling at her. "Not to mention the old, 'It's not you, It's me', line."

"You beat me to the punch on that one," she said. "I do hope that everything works out for you and Hermione. She's a lucky girl."

"I'm the lucky one," he said.

"Well, I better go," she said. "Busy day at the office and all that. Take care of yourself, Harry."

"You, too," he said, giving her a hug. She smiled at him before turning on her heel to walk away.

"Maggie?" Harry called after her.

She turned around. "Yeah?"

"Thank you," he said.

"For what?" she asked, confused.

"For being a part of my life," he said. "You were a very important, special part of my life."

"Goodbye, Harry Potter," she said softly, giving him a smile.

************************************************************************

Sirius sat down at Hermione's bedside and took her hand in his.

"Hermione, Hermione, Hermione," Sirius said, taking a deep breath. "I don't know if you can hear me or not, but I want to thank you for all that you did for Harry. Correction--all that you've done for Harry. He wasn't dealt a very kind hand in his life, but he's gotten through all of that and I think that's due in large part to you."

Sirius smiled as he remembered that thirteen-year old girl who'd stood along side Harry and helped him escape on Buckbeak those many years ago.

"You know, I've never told Harry this, but when I first met you, I could tell that you cared about him," he said. "I could see it in your eyes. Someone once told me that you can tell a lot about people by their eyes-that they never lie. I saw that when I met you and saw how you looked at my godson. He's lucky to have had you in his life, in more ways than one."

"If James and Lily were here, I think-no, I know---that they'd be proud of their son for making such a great choice in a wife," Sirius said. "They would have loved you. They would have loved you for the man you helped their son become. I've always thought of Harry as my son and I hope you know that I love you just like a daughter."

"So," Sirius said, smiling down at her. "You make sure you wake up with all your memories in tact, young lady. I don't think any of could take it if we lost you again."

He bent down and kissed her on the forehead.

"Fight for it, Hermione," Sirius said softly. "We need you to much to let you go again."

With those words and one last look at Hermione, Sirius walked out of the room.

***************************************************************

A few moments later, Ron walked into Hermione's room and felt tears come to his eyes as he looked at his best friend. She did look as if she was taking a long, peaceful nap.

"Hermione Granger," he said, wiping a tear from his face. "If you tell anyone that I was crying, well, I'll just-I don't rightly know what I'll do, but it won't be pretty."

He took a seat at her bedside.

"I, um, don't know what to say, really," he said. "I seem to get that way a lot around you, huh? You have this knack of knowing what to say to push my buttons. I guess, I did the same to you, so it's only fair."

He laughed.

"We sure took bantering to a whole new level, didn't we?" Ron said. "To tell you the truth, I never thought you were mental. I mean, don't get me wrong, you had your mental-like moments, but I never thought you were nutters, or anything like that."

"I know I used to drive you crazy," he said, smiling as he remembered the number of times she'd been exasperated with him over something. "If I had a knut for every time you rolled your eyes at me or said 'honestly!' I don't think I'd have to work another day in my life."

"If it hadn't been for you, Hermione, I wouldn't have met Kit," Ron said. "She's the best thing in my life. I like to give her a hard time, too. She rises to the occasion just like you used to do. Thank you for bringing her into my life, Hermione."

Ron looked at his best friend, still lying peacefully on her bed.

"We haven't asked Harry yet, but Kit and I decided that we wanted the two of you to be our baby's godparents," Ron said. "With me as a dad that baby's going to need all the help he can get, right?"

"Oh, and I'm going to tell you something now that I never confessed to you, but I think you always knew," he said, his eyes twinkling at her. "That night during fourth year when we were discussing the Yule Ball and I pissed you off because I asked you to the ball as a last resort? You said that just because it took me three years to notice, it didn't mean that no else had spotted you were a girl? I always knew that Hermione. I was such a jackass to you, then, wasn't I? It was because I had this massive crush on you, though. It wouldn't have worked out between us, though. We would have killed each other! Besides, I think you and I ended up as we were supposed to---friends. We're both with who we were always supposed to be with."

"Harry needs you, Hermione," Ron said. "He always has. You didn't get a chance to see him after you 'died'. It wasn't a pretty picture. It was like he lost a part of himself and I guess he did. I know I'd be the same if I ever lost Kit."

"Don't you go telling everyone how mushy I got," Ron said with a laugh. "I have a reputation to protect after all."

*************************************************************************

Kit and Billie walked in a few moments after Ron did.

"What should we do?" Kit asked. "Talk to her? Do you think she knows we're here?"

"I think so," Billie said. "I hope so."

"She's something else, isn't she?" Kit asked. "Some people will do anything to take a nap. I might have to get my hands on that potion after I give birth. I hear that I'm not going to have a pleasant night's sleep for at least 18 years."

Billie laughed.

"I have two children to raise," Kit said, her voice deadpan.

"Two?" Billie asked, amazed. "I didn't know that you are Ron were having twins."

"We're not," Kit said, smiling. "I have to take care of the baby and her father, the overgrown child."

Billie chortled.

"Now, I know exactly what Hermione was talking about when she'd tell me stories about Ron and Harry. He can be such a doofus, sometimes, but he's my doofus and I love him for it."

"That's the way it should be," Billie said.

"So, what's going on with you and Mr. Black?" Kit asked.

"I have no idea what you're talking about," Billie said. "We're just two adults."

"With the hots for each other," Kit finished for her.

"I wouldn't say the hots, just the extremely warms," Billie said. "He is a good-looking son-of-a-gun isn't he?"

"Sounds like someone likes him," Kit said.

"He does sort of melt my butter," Billie said, blushing.

"Oh, it's so good to have someone here who knows my old, Southern colloquiums," Kit said. "Us, Southern belles have to stick together."

"That we do," Billie said.

Kit looked down at her friend.

"She's going to be okay," Kit said. "I just know it."

"I think so, too," Billie said, smiling at Kit. "I think so too."

***********************************************************************

Around midnight, Harry was the only one by Hermione's bedside. The others, save for Robert and Karen had all gone home. Robert and Karen were sleeping in one of the spare hospital rooms and Harry was finding it hard to stay awake himself as he sat at Hermione's side.

He felt emotionally drained from the day's events. He leaned back on the chair and closed his eyes. He fell asleep, although he fought it every step of the way.

Sometime during the night, he awoke when he felt someone clutching his hand. He awoke with a start and as the room was very dark, he couldn't see a thing.

"Harry?"

ANOTHER CLIFFHANGER!!!!! HAAAAAHAAAAAAHAAAAA (EVIL LAUGHTER) I couldn't resist!!!! I apologize for the delay in getting this one out. I had a bad case of writer's block. I knew what I wanted to happen in the chapter, but was at a loss at how to write it. I don't know if I like how it turned out, but here it is, for better or for worse. I know you guys will let me know what you think!!!! Thanks for all the feedback, ya'll!!!!