Unofficial Portkey Archive

Confused Paths

Disclaimer: I don't own anything, just the plot (is there a plot here?) and the OCs. Don't sue me, JKR; I'm poor and I don't have any money.

Chapter 9 - Home

Harry was sitting by the fire, in the Gryffindor Common Room, and Hermione was by his side. The girl had recently discovered that S.P.E.W. had no progress during the last term (she had seen Dobby wearing all the hats and socks she knitted), and now was scribbling furiously some new plans for her cause. Harry was pretending to listen; he had a lot of other things in his mind right now.

Less than twelve hours before, the other students had left the school for the Christmas Holiday. Harry and Hermione were the only Gryffindors remaining, and Ginny had charged Harry with the mission of confessing his feelings. During the last five days, the red-haired girl had proved in every possible way that Hermione was interested on him as well as he was interested on her. The only question the fifth-year couldn't explain was why Harry had to confess first. 'Why can't Hermione say it first?' Harry wondered.

"Harry," called Hermione, interrupting Harry's thoughts. "Did you listen to anything I said?" The girl asked. "Sorry, I just got carried away in thought," he answered sheepishly. "But I agree with that you said before… We have to start slowly, like, treating them well, and then we can talk about their independence," he added, lamely. Hermione gave him a small smile. "You have been quite thoughtful lately. Is there something happening that I don't know?" She asked, concerned.

"No, there is nothing happening," he said, avoiding Hermione's gaze. She turned his face to her and asked, "What is it, Harry? You do not need to lie to me." Harry looked into her eyes, and felt suddenly drawn into them. He leaned his face closer to hers. "I know that, Hermione," he said, his voice sounded like a whisper. His face was dangerously close to hers now. He had never been this close to anyone before, except when Cho kissed him last year…

A sound behind the couch snapped them out of their trance. Dobby, the house elf, had just appeared in the Common Room, and was looking directly at Harry. "Harry Potter, sir." said the house elf, "Dobby hopes he is not interrupting anything, sir, but Headmaster Dumbledore asked if you, sir, and your special friend, are coming down to dinner. Everyone else is down there already, sir."

"No, you are not interrupting anything, Dobby," Harry said. His cheeks were flushed and he wasn't looking at Hermione. He knew he was just about kissing her when the elf appeared, and was very embarrassed. "Tell Professor Dumbledore we are coming down already," the boy finished. "Right away, sir," the elf said, and bowed until his nose touched the floor. He disappeared right after that, and left the two teenagers in an awkward silence.

"We use only one table when there are few people for Christmas," Harry said, breaking the silence. He was still avoiding Hermione's gaze. He could feel she wasn't looking at him, too. "That is why Dumbledore is waiting for us to come down," he added. "We'd better go", he finished, and finally turned to Hermione. Her cheeks were a bit flushed, like Harry's, and she was looking to the floor. "Hmm… Let me just put these things in my room," she answered. She picked the S.P.E.W. parchments from the table and left for the girls' dormitories. 'I have just screwed everything,' Harry thought, watching her leave.

They got to the Great Hall together, but still in silence. Like Harry said, there was only one table in the Hall, with fourteen occupants, plus the two empty chairs they would be sitting on. The teachers (except Snape, of course) and some of the students greeted them with a "Good evening" when they sat. Harry saw the Garnier siblings were there, and had amused smiles on their faces. The boy blushed slightly and turned away.

Harry and Hermione soon resumed their conversation; it was hard to have dinner side by side without exchanging a single word. Professor Dumbledore, as expected, was always trying to make everyone join the conversation; the headmaster managed to gather Harry, Hermione and the potions master in a conversation about N.E.W.T.s. Harry wondered whether he or Snape was the best in faking civility.

The two Gryffindors left the Hall together, when there almost no one there; they had some good laughs about the happenings at the table, especially when Dumbledore said the teachers could call the students by the first name. Nothing could be more amusing than hearing Snape say "Harry" and "Hermione" instead of "Potter" and "Miss Granger".

Their laughs were stifled when they arrived at the Common Room. As if replaying the scene before Dobby's entrance, the two of them kept silent for some seconds. Harry decided to apologize for everything. Before he could open his mouth, though, Hermione spoke first. "I am a little tired, maybe I should go to bed," the girl said, but she didn't sound like herself. "I can not wait to see what you have got me for Christmas," she added with a smile, as if she needed an excuse to go to sleep so early. Harry smiled back and said, "Eager, aren't we? Maybe I should hold it with me a little more." Hermione slapped him playfully. "That is not fair, you know. If you do that, I will make sure you will not be getting anything until Easter Break," she replied. Harry pretended to be shocked and said, "Okay, I give up. I can not defeat such an evil mastermind." Both of them broke into laughter until Hermione said "Good night" and left towards the girls' dormitories. Harry watched her leave before walking away to his own bed.

Harry was awoken in the Christmas morning by Hermione's calls. "Good morning," he said to her, in a sleepy voice. "Good morning, sleepy-head," she said, and smiled. "I decided it was no fun to open your present if you were not there, so, I decided to wake you up," she added. "Get up and change your clothes, I will be waiting for you in the Common Room," she finished, before leaving. Harry got dressed very slowly and started to check out on his gifts. He never had a big pile of presents, but this year it seemed even smaller. 'Sirius,' he thought to himself, and felt some tears forming in his eyes. He shrugged the thought away and went down to the Common Room, carrying his pile of gifts with him.

"Finally," Hermione said, when he got down. "I am anxious to open this," she added. "Why didn't you open it by yourself?" Harry asked. "That is because I have a feeling I already know what it is, so I want to open it when you open the one I have for you," she answered. The girl seemed quite embarrassed, for some reason. "Well… You can tell me what it is, then," he said, challenging her. "It is the same thing I have given you," Hermione replied. Harry wasn't expecting that answer, and didn't reply. Instead, he picked Hermione's gift out of his pile. The box had the same size of the one the brown-haired girl was holding. He was surprised, to say the least.

Harry opened it, and got even more surprised to see she was right. Inside the small velvet box, there was a heart-shaped charm. It was supposed to be worn alongside the pendants they had given one another earlier. Harry's eyes widened and his mouth was shaped exactly like an "o". Hermione laughed at his face and said, "By the look on your face, I guess I was right," she said. "It is a shame Colin Creevey is not here, that would be a great photography," she added and opened her own box. She took the heart-shaped charm on her hand, and proceeded to attach the charm to her pendant.

"Let me do it," Harry said, snapping out of his shocked state. Hermione turned her back to him and held her hair with her hands, while Harry unclasped the pendant from her neck and attached the new charm to it. When he was finished, Hermione did the same to him. When she was finished, Harry unconsciously pulled her in a hug. "Thank you, Hermione," he said. "I really do not know what I have done to deserve you," he finished. She hugged him back and said in a whisper, "Same here."

They pulled away when they heard a noise outside the window. There was a small white owl there, carrying quite a large package and it was trying to enter the Gryffindor Tower. Harry opened the window and the small bird made its way into the tower, landing near the fireplace. Hermione untied the package from the bird's leg and it left the tower back to the snowing morning.

"It is destined to both of us," Hermione said, while Harry was closing the window. "From the Garniers," she added. "There is something else here," she continued.

Hello Harry and Hermione!

We hope Angel did not wake you up; it can be quite loud sometimes. Do not mind we are giving you a Christmas gift, we felt like doing so, and we thought you would like this book. We have tried doing some of the stuff inside, but it did not work for us, so, maybe you can learn and teach everyone in DA later. Happy Christmas.

Rafaelle and Johan Garnier

Hermione read the note aloud, and turned to Harry when she was finished. He was still looking out at the window. "It is the first time I see another white owl," he said. "But that one is a lot smaller than Hedwig," he added, and turned away from the window. Hermione nodded in concordance, and then opened their mutual present. It was a book called 100 Spells for Aurors. Hermione showed the cover to Harry. "Maybe we can use that at DA later," he said. "But I will need to practice before teaching, and I guess I will need a partner," he added, with a mischievous grin. "Right, I will take a look at it," Hermione answered, smiling back, "Now you have got to open your other gifts before we go down for breakfast. I am starving."

Harry opened his other gifts quickly. As expected, Ron didn't send him anything. Harry shrugged it off. 'It is still too early to settle everything now,' he thought, 'But I wished he could understand it.' On the other hand, this year he had received gifts from Remus, Tonks, Ginny, Neville, Mrs. Weasley (the usual Weasley jumper; Hermione had gotten one too, and she forced him to wear it) and Hagrid, besides the ones from Hermione and the Garniers. He had never received so many gifts, and it helped to ease his mood a bit.

When they went down to breakfast, they were greeted by the two Garnier siblings again. Harry and Hermione thanked them for the gift, and Hermione said it would be very useful (she had already read twenty-five pages) for the DA. The siblings smiled and confessed once again their complete inability to cast most of the spells there. "I am counting on you to teach me everything there," Johan said to Harry. The four of them were by themselves on the table; it seemed most people weren't awoken yet.

After the breakfast, the two siblings challenged Harry and Hermione on a snowball fight. They accepted, and the two boys exchanged taunts while walking outside. When they found a good spot, they settled the rules. To Harry's surprise, Hermione was adamant against magic use. The siblings seemed quite disappointed, but they agreed.

"Why were you against magic use?" Harry asked Hermione, when the Garniers were walking away. "You could beat the two of them anytime," he added with a smile. "I know that," Hermione said, mischievously. "But as I have got you to hamper my amazing skills, I am not sure I can win," she continued. Harry didn't expect that kind of answer, and looked at Hermione amazed. "I am joking, you git," she said. "In fact, I was against magic use because I heard Professor McGonagall saying those two are quite good with Transfiguration. They would have the upper hand here," she explained. Harry nodded in concordance. Regardless of his excellent score at the Transfiguration O.W.L., lately he was doing quite badly in classes.

Harry had a great time during the game. Playing without magic had its advantages. The siblings seemed to have little experience with that game, and without magic-built walls, Harry and Hermione were beating them badly. After six losses, the siblings gave up.

"Okay, okay, we give it up," Johan said, walking towards Harry and Hermione. "I propose a partner change here. Boys against girls now, what do you think?" The black boy asked. Harry looked mischievously at Hermione. "You know, Granger," he said, "It is time to decide who the better between us is." Hermione followed his lead. "You are in, Potter. You will be eating snow when this game is over," she said, winking at him. Johan and Harry walked together to one side, and Hermione joined Rafaelle at the other side.

The girls soon had the upper hand on the game. Harry and Johan had lost three times already, and were now hidden behind a snow wall. The girls had ceased their attacks; it seemed both teams were waiting to do a surprise strike.

"Can I ask you something, Harry?" Johan whispered, while they were waiting. Harry nodded. "You fancy Hermione, don't you?" He said, matter-of-factly. Harry blushed slightly. "Is it that obvious?" He replied. The French boy smiled and nodded. "I have realized that since the day I have first seen you together. You look at her with that dreamy expression, you know," he said, and Harry felt his cheeks flush harder. He looked away quickly, and the French continued. "Have you already told her how you feel?" The boy asked. Harry shook his head and said, "I am working on it." He was about to tell Johan that he couldn't do it now because of what happened last night, but he wouldn't say that to a Slytherin, no matter if he seems to be nice. 'Why I am having this kind of talk with him, anyway?' Harry thought to himself. He opened his mouth to change the subject, but was interrupted.

"You know, Rafaelle thinks Hermione fancies you too," Johan said. "And you know, you should not make a lady wait. I know someone who made a lady wait during four years. They are happy now, but were miserable during those years," he added. Harry didn't have an answer to that. Johan sensed that and said, "Back to war now, love can wait until we are finished." Harry nodded and they resumed their game.

Later that day, Harry was thinking about Johan's words, in the Gryffindor Common Room. Hermione was having a shower, and he was waiting for her to come down, so they could go down to dinner. The raven-haired boy was surprised that even the Garniers, who had known him during four months, could sense his feelings for Hermione. It was about time to reveal them. He didn't want to be miserable, like the guy from Johan's story. Or worse, he didn't want Hermione to be miserable, if she really fancied him. Ginny had said, "Her crush lasted longer than mine." Did that meant Hermione had fancied Harry since first year? 'No, that can not be,' Harry thought. 'She dated Krum, and Ron; she would not do it if she fancied me… Right?'

He was afraid. Afraid that Hermione had really fancied him during five years, that she had been miserable during five years; he couldn't stand that. He would confess everything.

Hermione was coming down the stairs. Harry looked at her. She was beautiful. She had always been beautiful. Harry had never told her that until fifth year. It was there, but he never cared to say. He took her for granted, and realized how much she meant when she was away. He had never imagined he would feel this way for his best friend. But it was there.

"Hey Harry," she said, and smiled at him. "I am sorry I took so long, I had to wash my hair and you know how it is," she added. He nodded and tried to smile, but realized he was too nervous to smile. She realized too. Her gaze instantly charged with concern. Harry saw it inside them.

"I have something to tell you," he began. He lowered his head. He couldn't look in her eyes now. Struggling, he raised his head again and saw she was waiting. She was expecting him to say something. He continued.

"I will understand if you can not reciprocate that," he said, his voice trembling with anticipation. "I really like you, Hermione." He said it, but he knew that wasn't everything. Before he could finish, she answered, "I really like you too, Harry. Of course I can reciprocate that." Her voice was almost a whisper. She was also feeling the air charged with emotions. She just didn't understand which emotions.

"It is not like that, Hermione," Harry said. He sighed. "I like you, but as more than a friend."

He had said it. It was done now. No going back.

'Why can't she say anything?' Harry thought. 'I am here, waiting for an answer, and she keeps looking at me in silence! Do not do this to me, Hermione…'

Harry saw the tears forming in her eyes, and falling down her cheeks. 'That is it,' he thought. 'She does not feel the same; she would not be crying if she did…'

"I am sorry," he said, his voice still trembling. "Do not be," she said. "You have nothing to be sorry for," she continued. "I also like you, as more than a friend," she finished.

Harry was dumbstruck. She liked him back. 'But why are you crying, then?' The boy thought. As if reading his mind, she said, "I am sorry for the tears, I am just being girlish," she said. She was almost whispering. Harry stepped nearer to her, and she threw herself in his arms. They remained like that for some minutes. Harry could feel the sweet scent of her hair, while she was sobbing on his chest. He stroked her hair, like he had done some times before. She stopped crying and said, "I was not expecting you to feel this way for me. People told me to believe, because you were always gentle and caring, but I know that is the way you are. I could not believe I had any chance with you."

"I am sorry," he said. "I should have expressed myself better," he added. "I was afraid of hurting myself, and I did not think I could be hurting you until today. I thought you could fancy Krum, or Ron, or anyone else, but not me," he finished, and held her tighter against him.

"You have never given yourself much credit," she said. "But I suppose I did not help much. I wasn't sure about how I felt until I dated Ron," she admitted. "I dated Viktor because he was the first one to notice me as a girl. I wanted that. Unfortunately, that was the only thing he saw on me. I wanted someone who could appreciate me as both a friend and a girl, and he could not," she said.

"When Ron asked me out, I was sure it would work out. He knew me as a friend and as a girl. He knew me, but he did not really want me. He wanted me to show you can not have everything. I did not realize that right away; I thought Ron was the right guy, and I struggled to make it work. I saw myself doing the things he liked instead of the things I like. That was not me. That is why I broke up with him."

"Then, I saw there was only one person that saw all of me. It was you. But you never acted like you wanted things to change. Yesterday, when we were about to kiss, I thought it would finally happen. But when we got back here, everything was normal again. I was feeling so bad I ran away to my bed. I was not expecting you to do this today; that is why I am crying," she finished.

"I am sorry, sweetheart," Harry said. "I have not been doing very well lately, I guess," he added. "But if you let me, I can make up for that kiss."

Hermione pulled her head away from his chest, and looked into his eyes. She didn't say anything, but Harry understood. He leaned his face onto hers, and their lips touched. He experienced a whole new sensation; it wasn't like this when Cho kissed him last year. He could feel the sweet taste of Hermione's lips; something like cherry, he thought. He could also feel a current of electricity running through him; as if he had just been awaken from a long slumber. This was where he belonged, he was sure. After some seconds, they pulled apart.

"I was right," Hermione said. "You are not a bad kisser," she added, and giggled. Harry blushed slightly. "But I guess I need to teach some advanced uses of your tongue," she finished, and smiled mischievously.

Harry wasn't expecting something like this, not from Hermione. But this was Hermione his girl, not Hermione his friend. 'Some things will be different, and this difference is definitely for good,' he thought. He grinned at her and said, "I'd like that."

A/N: Here you are.

SilverFoot: Hmm... I'll add that "still" when I start editing the story… Thanks. ^_^

fenriswolf: I have a friend who's a hard R/Hr shipper and sometimes she throws some of those weird theories at me… And I really think Ron's easier to manipulate, especially if that's Hermione we're talking about.

Thanks to my beta CaliberKX and to everyone who reviewed. ^_^ Next chapter on Friday. R/R, I know you'll like this chapter. ;P