Chapter 16- Clouded Feelings
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James and Lily decided to go to the Gryffindor Common Room just as Dumbledore had advised. They entered the Portrait Hole and felt a stampede of people attack them. They were being hugged left and right. Sirius had come and given James the biggest bear-hug he could muster while Remus and Peter grinned. Katy and Halle were hugging Lily with tears rolling down their cheeks.
When the little reunion was over, they all went to sit on the couch. Most of the Gryffindors had gone to bed after hearing that James and Lily were ok. The only ones left were James, Lily, Sirius, Halle, Remus, Katy, and Peter.
"Prongs, what the hell happened to you guys?" Sirius asked.
"Well, we didn't know Voldemort had turned up so we were left alone with him," James replied.
"You guys weren't in the Three Broomsticks or any shops so you couldn't have known," Remus said putting the pieces together.
"Cornelius Fudge himself was in the shops advising everyone to leave and head back to the castle. He made a Portkey and all the students left. We thought you guys were told as well," Peter said.
There was a silence and all they all stared absently into the fire.
"Sirius, I think there is something you should know," James said.
"Hmm?" Sirius asked.
"I think Bellatrix is a Death Eater," James said. He was really withdrawing the bad news for later. Sirius was really close with his parents.
Sirius's cousin was Bellatrix Black. She had recently left Hogwarts and had gone off to Albania somewhere. She was once Sirius's favorite cousin until he got into Gryffindor and she into Slytherin.
"Was she-was she there you know?" Sirius asked.
"I'm not positive but it looks like she was one of the Death Eaters who got away from us. Me and Lily took down the other two but she and Voldemort dodged the spells," James said.
Peter, Halle, and Katy winced at the sound of his name.
"Oh cut it out you guys. He is our enemy so you need to learn to hear and speak his name. I have," Lily said.
James asked everyone if he could speak to Sirius privately.
"What else happened?" Sirius asked suspiciously.
"Sirius, my parents are dead," James said. He felt his eyes sting with tears.
"What????" Sirius asked, his eyes going bloodshot as well.
"Dead," James said. He felt tears collect in his own eyes but fought to hold them back. He knew Sirius was feeling the same way as he. They were like brothers and James's parents were Sirius's only family after his own disowned him. He fully appreciated Sirius so much at that moment. He knew it was just as hard on him.
"They can't be dead. They can't!" Sirius walked over to the wall and started punching it until his knuckles bled. James looked at Sirius and felt sympathy. They had no one. James's grandparents and his parents had been killed by Voldemort. James was the only remaining Potter and he knew it was only a matter of time before Voldemort figured out a way to get into the school.
The intercom that was projected around school was flashing. Sirius and James both looked up and listened. They heard Professor McGonagall's voice.
"Attention everyone. Due to recent events, Quidditch is off for the rest of the school year. I know this may be upsetting but it is for everyone's own safety. Thank you," she said.
Sirius looked at the intercom dumb-struck. James thought he himself would feel upset about this but surprisingly he only felt relief.
"Dude, can you believe this?" Sirius asked him. "First your parents, now this?!?"
"Yeah, I can," he answered.
"What?" Sirius asked in disbelief.
"Voldemort's after me too and during my short time to live I want to spend time doing important things. Like spending time with Lily and training to be an Auror. Sirius, there are more important things than Quidditch," James said.
"Wow," Sirius said softly.
"Wow what?" James asked.
"You really have grown up," he answered, his tone surprisingly serious and mature.
"Yes, and I think it's time you did too," James said, making eye contact with his best friend.
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"So Lily, are you sure you're ok? I mean, you went through a lot today," Halle asked her friend with worry in her eyes.
"Halle, I am fine with this all. Well, of course not all of it but I feel much stronger," Lily answered bravely.
"What do you mean?" asked Katy.
"I mean that this has changed my whole purpose in life. Last year if you would have told me all the things that has happened in this year I would have laughed in your face. But now, I know how I want to spend my life," Lily said, feeling a smile grow on her face even after all that had happened.
"Well, how do you want to spend it?" Halle asked her.
"Fighting Voldemort with James Potter by my side," she said.
"I thought you wanted to be a teacher, Lil. You wanted that for so long, and Professor Flitwick was looking forward to an early retirement. He thought Dumbledore would hire you once you graduated," Halle said, reminiscing on their favorite teacher.
"Halle, my mom was killed by Voldemort. You don't understand. Now, my boyfriend is the only remaining of his family and may be attacked by Voldemort. I don't have time to be a teacher. I want to be an Auror, by his side, until the day I die. I love him so much it hurts," she acknowledged.
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The girls just looked at Lily and felt sadness seep through their hearts. They wanted to feel love. Katy said goodnight to Lily and told her to go straight to the head's dorm and take a long bath. Then, she walked down to the Gryffindor Common Room to find Remus asleep on the couch. She was ready to talk to him.
She went over and poked his arm. He stirred and then slowly opened his eyes. He thought he was still dreaming because the same girl he was dreaming about was standing over him.
"Remus Lupin, I need to talk to you. I am not taking no for an answer so get up," Katy said.
"Ok, I guess," he answered her. He rose off of the couch and they walked out of the Portrait Hole. They headed towards the Prefects Common Room and found it deserted. They sat on the blue loveseat that was in the middle of the room.
"I need you to know something Remus. I know you don't love me, but I love you with all my heart. The day you saved my life, my feelings turned from platonic to serious. It's hard to explain," she said, stumbling on many of the words.
"I love you too," Remus said quietly looking into her eyes.
"You what?" Katy asked. Her blue eyes with wide with disbelief, shock, and relief.
"You heard me," he said sadly.
"Then why did you run from me?" she asked.
"I had no choice," he simply answered.
"Can you elaborate on that please," Katy requested. She was getting annoyed byhis secretive manner.
"Are you sure you're ready to hear the truth?" he asked, afraid of her reaction.
"Of course," she answered with true sincerity in her words.
"I am telling you that it's not good truth and that you may feel differently about me afterwards," Remus said.
"Nothing could change how I feel about you. I'm not about to run from you," Katy said, placing a comforting hand on his.
"Ok. When I was a little boy I received a bite from a werewolf," he said slowly, and clearly. He looked at her cautiously, waiting for a reaction.
"You think I wouldn't love you because you're a werewolf?" she asked.
"Well, most girls wouldn't," Remus mumbled.
"Am I like most girls to you Remus?" Katy asked.
"Well, no. I was scared. I didn't want to hurt you," he truthfully stated.
She leaned in to kiss him and loved the way his soft lips felt against hers. He ran a hand through her blonde hair and felt warmth in his heart. They kissed passionately for about a half and hour before Katy said something.
"Remus, can you do me a favor?" she asked him.
"I guess," he said.
"I want you to be my first," Katy said, bluntly.
"What?!?" he asked, jumping up from the couch.
"I am afraid to die without experiencing love and I want to know that I have shared something special with you," Katy said, smiling hopefully.
"Katy, are you sure?" he asked, quite uneasy about it all.
"Yes," she said with certainty in her voice.
"Well, can I take you to somewhere other than the Prefects Lounge?" he asked, grinning.
"Absolutely," she said, smiling. He swept her off her feet and they headed out the door to the Room of Requirement.
"I love you, Remy."
"I love you too, Katy Jones."
A/N: I know, I know. Rushed. But, Katy is impulsive.