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Where It All Went by NatiFcs28
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Where It All Went

NatiFcs28

Song: "Remember When It Rained" by Josh Groban (my baby!!)

Chapter Four

By Natali

(Later that afternoon...)

"Well, Lily dear," Miriam said as she passed a bowl of steamed broccoli to her. "What type of trouble does James get into at school? His friends are as loyal as dogs, damn it. I believe you could give us some juicy lecture topics."

James's eyes flew to Lily's across the table. It was almost too good to pass up, she thought. Miriam and Charlie didn't know all the things that James did. Naturally, that was because he didn't always get caught.

She teased him. He looked so desperate. But she teased him nonetheless, pretending to think it over.

"You wouldn't believe me if I told you," she said finally, taking a bite of chicken. She looked again at James and smiled. "But he's an angel at heart... Somewhere deep inside him."

"Ah, you're loyal too," Charlie said, a hint of approval in his voice. "Damn it all." He feigned anger. Charlie smiled the next instant and attacked his potatoes.

With a serene smiled, Lily turned her attention back to her lunch. "This is really good chicken, Miriam."

"I didn't make it, dear," Miriam chuckled.

"Oh, I know. But do tell Cook, if I don't see her before I leave, that she just might get a letter from me, annoying her to come and cook for me," Lily grinned.

An idea formed in Miriam's head. "Why don't you join us for dinner every once in awhile?" With a quick glance at her husband, she continued.

"I'd like that very much," Lily decided. "If James agrees with it."

"Far be it from me to disturb female bonding," he shrugged.

"Isn't this a happy family? I wish someone had told me James finally brought one of his hundreds of girlfriends home. I would have prepared a questionnaire, beginning with: `What the hell do you see in my brother?'"

By now, everyone's attention was on the twelve-year-old brunette standing in the doorway. Her blue eyes were smiling, and she was holding a small case in her right hand.

"Angelina," James growled, running to her and picking her up. "We have a guest, you brat."

His sister giggled. "I can still ask her that question. I have a few more like; `Why on earth would you want to touch that?' That's my favorite."

She was turned upside down so that her chin-length hair was standing on end.

Lily laughed, watching them. James walked toward her with his upside-down sister still in his arms.

"This, Lily, is Angie, that brat I told you about that goes to that fancy genius school," he muttered, tickling her.

"James!" she laughed, turning red in the face.

"You're going to hurt her," Charlie warned.

"I wish," James muttered, grinning at Lily. He looked down at his sister. "Now, say your how do you do's and be off. I have a present for you waiting in your room."

"Really?" Angie asked excitedly. "What is it, James?" She looked at Lily, who she thought was quite pretty, even upside down. "Do you know?"

Lily smiled and nodded. "You'll like it," she promised.

Angie stuck out her arm. "How do you do, Lily? I hope your trip here was pleasant enough."

Lily laughed and accepted the hand. "I'm fine, thank you, Angie. My trip was fine. Did you have a nice day at school?"

"No," the little girl frowned. "Because I still have to go back. Those nuns are crazy. I swear it. But never mind that. If you'll excuse me, my brother likes to spoil me, and I have something awaiting me upstairs. James?" She was set down on the floor. "I'll be right back." She ran out of the room, squealing with anticipation.

"She's so cute," Lily laughed.

Miriam nodded. She saw the look her son was giving her.

"If you'd like, you can go back out into the garden. The dessert isn't quite ready yet. We'll call you in when it is," Miriam lied. The dessert had been ready since this morning.

James looked at Lily, who shrugged. "All right."

Hand in hand, they went out to the kitchen and through the back door.

"Your sister is so adorable," Lily said after a short, comfortable silence. She looked up from her shoes and looked at him with a soft smile. "Thank you, James."

He stopped her and asked, "For what?"

She shrugged, because she didn't really know. "I'm not sure. I think for bringing me here, because I've had a wicked time. Your parents are a blast, and your sister's the cutest."

"I didn't make them that way, you know," he chuckled.

"I know. But I told you, I'm not sure what I'm thanking you for."

"Well, there is one way you could show me how much you're thankful for whatever it is you're thankful for."

"Now there's the player I knew was somewhere in there." She laughed and planted a kiss on his lips. After he realized she wasn't going to pull away anytime soon, he hugged her to him and gently parted her lips with his tongue. Her mouth was warm and soft, and the flesh behind her bottom lip held him captivated.

Lily ran her hands from his arms to his chest, where she slid down to find the end of his shirt. First one hand disappeared, heading up, then the other. Muscle upon muscle contracted at her touch, and her right hand-the higher one-find little curls of hair. Suddenly, she found it very arousing.

There was an odd sensation in her lower abdomen, and she felt her heart beat rapidly. His muscles rippled, and she smiled.

"You're doing that on purpose," she accused him, lips resting on his own.

"Damn right," he admitted, kissing her again. "Oh, Lily." He kissed her hungrily.

She smiled under his lips and wrapped him in a hug. "What? You've never been kissed before?"

"Not by you."

"Yes, you have."

"Well, I'm sure not used to it."

"I can fix that."

*~*

(Present: At the inn with Lily and Jocelyn…)

"The way he was with his sister was so sweet, Jocelyn," Lily sighed, stirring her shake with a straw. "I mean, the git could've been cold with her for embarrassing him or making fun of him, but instead he grabbed her and played with her."

"Yes, James always was infatuated to no end with his sister," Jocelyn said, wincing when she realized her slip of the tongue. But Lily hadn't noticed.

"And I was going to tell him, out there in that gorgeous garden, but we got..." She laughed. "Side tracked I suppose."

"What you mean is that you had your tongue down his throat," Jocelyn chuckled. "Oh, dear, I remember being young."

"Jocelyn-do you think I'm being stupid? When my mates first found out, they said he was probably foxed or he didn't deserve me. I ignored them and left the next day."

When Jocelyn saw the look on Lily's face, her heart went out to her. She wanted to tell her very badly that James had been blackmailed. But Miriam had made her promise.

"Are you and his mum tight?" Jocelyn asked, even though she already knew the answer. Miriam doted on her son's fiancé. Or ex, rather.

Lily nodded, and tears sprang to her eyes. Her head immediately fell to the table.

"Oh! She's so nice! And Charlie too!" The tears came faster. "They've been so nice, and they've been like parents to me. I can't expect them to keep seeing me. He's their son! Not that they wouldn't, but I can't put them in that position."

Jocelyn rubbed her arm sympathetically. "Why don't you go and visit them? I'm sure they won't turn you away."

"Exactly!" came Lily's muffled exclamation. "I've got nowhere to go," she said more quietly. "My ex-guardians hate my guts, I won't put my mates into the position where they have to choose between James or me, I won't do that to his parents either, and I don't have a home."

"Do you have money?"

"Yes. But what's the point of that if I don't have a home?" She raised her red, blotchy, tear-stained face and looked at the lady who'd been so kind to her. "A home."

"And your home is with James?" Jocelyn asked softly, dreading the answer.

Lily was silent for a moment before answering. "Yes."

*~*

(--Outside of the inn...--)

James sighed and ran his hand through his hair. What was he going to do? She looked bloody wicked, even with her hair looking like it hadn't been brushed in days; even with her eyes red and swollen; even with a blotchy face that made her look tired and ragged; even when she looked so devastated.

He hated that fact.

He hated the people that did this.

He hated Penny.

But most of all, he hated himself. He'd made her sob like that. He'd broken her heart. If only she knew just how much he was hurting too.

He sighed once more and leaned against the wall. And Aunt Jocelyn, who wasn't really his aunt. She was there, telling Lily God knows what.

"Damn you, Lils," he said aloud. "Damn you."

He didn't really mean it. It was just the fact that it hurt to be around her, and know that he was the cause of her pain.

"Move on, Lils. Please, get over me. I can't be with you again," he whispered. The wind greeted him gently. "I love you, too."

And for the first time since he was seven and had broken his arm, James cried. And as he did, he remembered...

*~*

(--Memories: The same night Lily met the Potters...--)

James led her to the bottom step, and paused.

"There you are," he said softly. "Thanks for coming, Lily."

"Thanks for inviting me." She paused as she gathered courage for her next words. "It meant a lot, being the first girlfriend you ever took to meet your parents. I mean, I know you didn't mean anything by it, but it was special nonetheless."

He gently placed his fingers beneath her chin and brought her face up to look at him. "Oh, no, Lils. You've misunderstood me completely."

"How so?" she asked softly. It wasn't fair that he could control her like that. Those eyes of his... She felt lost. The odd sensation in her belly returned.

He kissed first her eyes, then her nose, then her temple with light, feathery kisses. Finally, his lips found hers. "I totally meant something by it, Lils."

"James...?"

Her voice had come out shaky, against her own will. She had tried to sound nonchalant.

He kissed her, desire and passion laced through every move.

"You know, I've never been much of the romantic, Lily," he said, delaying their kisses for a moment. "But you're the very first woman that I haven't had sex with after less than ten days. And the strange part is..." He searched for his words. "I don't really want to. I mean, I do. Just it's not all I'm after."

"And all this after seeing me in a bathing suit?" Lily asked hugging him. "You're a joke, James. By the by..." She smiled sensually up at him. "I feel the same way."

"So, your main priority wasn't to haul into your bed?" he joked, kissing her forehead. "Lily?"

She understood what he was asking.

"Yes, James," she replied quietly. "I'm a virgin."

He smiled into her hair, grateful she couldn't see it.

"And, if you think that I'm easy-"

"I told you, Lily," he interrupted her gently. "I'm not looking for that."

"You called me your girlfriend today," she smiled.

"Well, aren't you?"

She shrugged. "Apparently."

After another long, wet-and somewhat awkward-passionate kiss, Lily left him reluctantly and headed up the stairs.

James glanced at his watch. It read two o'clock in the morning. He smiled and practically ran up to his room.

*~*

(--Present...--)

James sighed again and pushed away from the wall. He'd have a talk with Jocelyn. Maybe he was doing this all wrong, just like his mum had told him.

He headed for Wrights' Hall, where he hoped that he'd be well received. He wasn't ready to confront Lily just yet. Or anyone, for that matter.

Later, as he sat at a desk in the room he'd been given, he took a sheet of paper and wrote a letter. He didn't know why he did it, but he felt that he should

Lily,

My love. I'm sorry. For all that it's worth, I still love you. I can't explain it. Lils, please, don't hate me. I can see that you're hurt, but I think I hurt even more. And being here doesn't help much. But then, I've been everywhere with you, so I couldn't get away if I tried. But I don't want to.

I want to see you. Could I? Please, Lils. You know I still love you. I always will. But this is for the best, my beautiful goddess--

He paused, frowning at the paper. Since when was he such a lovesick idiot?

"I should become one of those wretched depressed poets," he muttered to himself, shoving the chair back with his knees and rising. He looked at the letter for a moment and smiled.

"Never would she believe I wrote that," he chuckled. "Not if my life depended on it." He headed for the dining room, where lunch was probably being served.

He resented it, but he knew there was no escaping her. For the past week, her green eyes and exquisite red hair had been haunting him.

And in the end, he knew what would happen. But he'd put up one hell of a fight first. It was her safety at stake. Perhaps if he held out long enough she wouldn't even take him back when he finally caved in to his wants and told her everything.

James cringed. He didn't want that. But she needed that.

Right?

*~*

Well, there it is!! Thanks to all who reviewed and to those who shall review now.

Hint, there, FYI.

Um. I shall see you next Wednesday then, probably AFTER I've done my very first shift at the hospital *excited*!! I just cannot wait. At the moment, I've got a cold yet again, so yeah. And then cramps.

My health isn't so hot at the moment.

But it's One Tree Hill tonight and the rerun of Related that I missed! So much love to my fellow OTH-ers. I'm listening to "What Child Is This?" and am feeling quite Christmas-y. By Jessica Simpson, she really does sing it beautifully.

Much love!

Natali K. A.


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