The Dilemma-Chapter 8
Harry and Hermione went for a walk after saying good bye to some of their friends. Hermione felt worse than Harry in some ways. Hermione knew the girls on the Quidditch team from school, but only in passing until this weekend and was pleasantly surprised at how well they'd got on. Cho was staying until Sunday night when her family returned from their weekend holiday.
"Harry, I wish Ron could find a girl to take his mind off the heartache. I hope you understand why I feel so bad for him," she said.
"I don't know if it's going to help much but Cho and he seem to enjoy talking together. I don't get it, but they do," he looked up at the stars. "Can you conjure up something we could lay on here?" he asked.
"Harry? What for?" asked Hermione cautiously.
"Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't tell you and thought I was saying it out loud," Harry admitted. "I like to look at the stars when there are no bright lights to make them fade. There is usually meteor shower or two every night you know. I was just thinking we could lie down and talk. I swear that's it." It dawned on him how it must have sounded.
"Let me see," said Hermione taking her wand and saying, "Terra Cuberta". It seemed as if the grass weaved itself into something similar to a thatch weave used for grass huts making the soil disappear and creating a soft place to lie down.
"Wow, nice. Where did you learn that?" he inquired with a look of wonderment.
"I didn't learn it anywhere, I just guessed that if I concentrated on it and used words I knew meant `cover the land or covered land' something good might happen," she giggled. "Seriously, we could have ended up with a meteor shower on our heads. Just kidding."
Harry laughed as he took her hand and guided her to the soft seemingly clean ground beneath them. He kissed her cheek quickly. "That was brilliant, whatever you did."
Harry lay back hoping she'd join him. She did but not as close as he'd have liked. "I don't bite, you know."
"No, maybe not, but if you want me you have to come get me," she giggled.
"Oh, I see how it is," he said sliding over toward her. As he did, she scooted away a little more giggling. It was only a matter of a half an arm's length but enough to prohibit feeling her next to him. He moved closer again with same result. So he lay still.
"Giving up so easy?" she asked sadly.
He tried to move as subtly as he could putting his weight on his right buttock and shoulder so he could pounce. Without warning he rolled over put his hand on the ground on the other side of her waist effectively trapping her beneath him without putting his weight on her. "Hah ha, gotcha, you little witch," he chuckled.
"Question is: do you know what to do now that you got me?" she smiled slyly.
He lowered himself to the enchanted, thatched blanket beneath them kissing her softly. He hadn't felt a girl beneath him this way before. He moved so his left knee was just below hers and between her legs so that they were face to face and his left chest barely touched hers. This was exciting he thought. She's so cute. His heart quickened with the excitement.
"I guess maybe you do yay!" she smiled and kissed him softly. "I'm glad you didn't just jump on me this so much more fun," she said a minute or so later as they came up for air.
Harry was glad she said that. He knew that it was a playful time in their lives and being pinned by a horny fifteen year old boy would probably take it to a much too serious level and take some of the fun out of it. He had plenty of time to touch her they way he wanted. But kissing was fun and harmless in their world at the moment.
"Well, you weren't going to tease me like that for long. I had to do something," he said as he touched her hair watching her expression carefully,
"You know I can't make things easy for you, Harry," she said fluttering her eyelids playfully. "Harry, this is so much fun being with you. What are we going to do about Ron? It's so unfair to him and us. If we stay it, it would be cruel to make him see us together. The alternative is making me go home to my parents and you to that horrible family."
He leaned back a little taking the little bit of weight he had resting on her off and back on to his elbow and side. "I was thinking about that as we talked earlier. It's not something I like to think about."
"Do we just see how things go tomorrow? I mean, what choice is there?" she asked.
"I know this may sound stupid, but the only one really is to make Ron deal with it," said Harry. "I'm not giving you up."
"Wow that sounds like just what I hoped to avoid. Two boys ready to fight over me. I'm not a prize Harry," she said.
"I didn't mean it like that. Hermione, how long can a guy have a crush on someone that drives them to distraction before they realize that the window has passed for them? I'll bet if he asked you to the Yule Ball and it went well things would be different-way different," said Harry.
"I prefer to think that you would have been woken up sooner to our feelings for each other," said Hermione. "Have you ever noticed that someone in love or with a crush is more attractive to everyone not just their partner than one who isn't?"
"Yeah, that's why I ran back to kiss you. I wanted to make Ron jealous," he said. "I've had a thing for him for years." He kept a straight face.
"Oh, Harry that's gross," she said laughing. "But it would explain the little love squabbles you guys have all the time." She poked fun at him right back.
"He didn't notice his feelings for me until he saw me with Viktor," she said with more excitement than Harry thought should have been in her voice.
"So, you did fancy Viktor more than you let on," he said enviously. "I'll bet you kissed him too, didn't you?"
"Would you have kissed Cho, if she went with you to the Yule Ball?" asked Hermione. "Don't ask me to answer you first, because the answers to both of them are the same."
"But I'm not talking about Cho like it meant something to me either," he said regretting his tone even as he spoke.
"Harry, we've been together three hours, maybe four and you're making an issue about a date I had and a going-no-where friendship with a guy who lives thousands of miles away?" she asked. "Please don't act like that, it's silly."
"I'm sorry, but you are hard to figure out. You liked Ron on the surface of things and me in a forbidden love sort of way, then dated the third guy because he asked you. Then you kissed him. When Ron got jealous, you told him to get up the courage to express how he felt or at least ask you to the dance. Six months later, you kiss me as that unrequited love thing surfaces. Then prepared to become Ron's girlfriend, but we end up confessing our love for one another and now you're my girlfriend. Forgive me if at this moment, you don't drive me a little crazy. Because now my heart leaps with joy every time I think of you and you just said something about a guy I know kissed you like you relived it." He felt better but he wasn't sure he'd made sense.
"Oh, and it's like I'm supposed to be the one who runs around to every guy who might like me and go. If you like me, ask me out or I'll find someone else who will ask me," she giggled. "If you don't know, girls are fickle because we have to be or we'd never find a guy with the courage to admit they want more than a quick feel and a kiss."
Harry thought for a second. "What?"
"Oh, never mind Harry. You are the one I would have like to have kissed the first time, if you want to know the truth. Problem is you were agog over Cho, so you missed the boat," she said. "But I had fun at the dance and I did like Viktor for showing me how much fun it is to be found attractive. You can be jealous of him or continue to be the way you were today--which was ten times more exciting to be with than he ever was." She folded her arms across her chest and stared skyward.
"Are you mad at me?" he asked. "I don't want that."
"Harry, it's hard enough to be happy without boy troubles, don't make it even harder. I love you, it should be clear by now," she said and after a few seconds she rolled atop him and sat on his stomach and pinned his wrists to just to the ground near his ears. He'd had them behind his head until he saw her jump him, but he was too slow. She was too quick and her weight caught him off guard. "And, yes I'm so mad at you that I want you to kiss me and make forget how mad I am."
"How am I supposed to do that from here?" he said as tried to crane his neck to kiss her with his hands pinned like they were. She teased him by almost getting close enough with her lips purse and then dodged out of the way giggling.
"I don't know. You found a way to finish that letter. This is just another challenge you'll have to over come," said Hermione kissing his forehead as he gave in to the strain and laid his head back down. When he tried to return it she sat up again and giggled. "So?"
Harry fought with all his might until he realized the error of his ways. He straightened his arms out parallel to with his shoulders. She had to either hold on or let go. Either way she was getting the same as she gave him, he thought.
She fell lightly to his chest giggling. He felt her soft chest on his. Her face just inches away. He decided being pinned this way wasn't so bad. He kissed her softly. "I'm sorry."
Her weight and the warmth of her body on his excited him and felt rewarding without the desire to move at all.
"Don't be sorry. I have no control over who likes me or doesn't Harry. And, in this position, I definitely get the feeling you like me." She blushed and so did he. "But I do have control over my happiness. I decided to take a chance on being happy with you and losing everything else. Don't you realize that?" she said. "You chose too and I think we're both glad."
"You don't see how wonderful you are, do you? I don't mean just cute and sexy. I mean that the way you treat people is so attractive that it makes people notice you. When they get to know you guys have no choice but to fall in love with you. It means that it's not jealousy so much as a slight bit of uncertainty if I'm good enough for you," he said.
"Well, if that's your worry don't. It will drive you crazy. We're both kind of blessed that way. I feel the same way about you. I know that someone would snap you up in a heartbeat if I don't take care of you and it's good that you respect that it's true about me too. We won't take each other for granted that way," said Hermione. "That's what I think happened to Ron. He just started feeling like he had time, because I never went out with anyone but you and him. I needed to know so I could move on. I don't think I was really going to say yes to him anyway. I would have had to have really been in love with him to drive a wedge between you and me."
"Did you say that to make me jealous tonight?" he asked.
"Regrettably, yes. But I could do worse than Ron and you know it. I didn't want you to fall into that trap, because I'm not stupid enough to think that we could keep our love alive like this forever without something making us admit it. It would have fallen into the same thing that happened between me and Ron. Love is a nurtured feeling; it can grow stagnant," she said.
"Do girls get a romance manual for their birthdays' at fourteen? Or, do you just get one that tells you how to break hearts?" laughed Harry.
"Oh, boys get the one on breaking hearts too Harry, don't kid yourself? And, girls just spend more time thinking about relationships instead of sneaking peeks at the lingerie sections of catalogues and playing Quidditch," she giggled.
"Ooh, I'd better be quiet and make sure I burn my catalogues," he snickered.
"Hah ha, don't you think you're funny?" she teased.
Eventually they found a way to hold each other that was comfortable and let them talk in between snogging sessions. That even died down as the excitement left them both deep in thought.
"Harry, do guys always think with their…you-know-what…instead their brain?" she giggled.
At first Harry was afraid that his excitement had scared her. But he realized that she hadn't acted like that at all and figured she must be talking about something else. "Please explain, that's kind of a hard question to answer."
"I mean didn't it seem sort of funny to you that Ron spent so much time with Cho even before he knew about our feelings for each other?" she asked.
"Oh, you mean like," he laughed. "I'm sorry George said something today that makes more sense now. I won't repeat it because I found it rude. To be honest, we do. If a girl shows interest we tend to return it like we have no control over ourselves. Is that what you mean?"
"Yeah, I didn't get the feeling he was ditching me or he liked her more than me, but I really didn't care either. The thing is I feel a little confused that he could be so attracted to someone when he said he wanted me," she said. "Before you think I'm being fickle again, it's just that it gave me an idea."
"What if we make it seem like we both are kind of uneasy about them being so buddy-buddy today?" she asked.
"What would that do, Hermione? I don't get it," said Harry
"If you liked someone and found out it drove your ex-, me for the sake of argument, batty wouldn't you play it up? And for Cho's part, if she likes you and sees that maybe you don't like seeing her with another guy, I think she'd do the same thing to see if we were really serious, don't you?" asked Hermione.
"I get you. Plant the seed that they looked awfully cozy. Ron might realize he has a chance with a pretty girl," said Harry.
"We need to be careful not so sound too interested. We don't want to seem like we'd break up over it. That's not what I mean. I mean if you thought I were going with Ron, wouldn't you have liked to have someone like Cho around to make you feel better?" asked Hermione. "Think of what I was doing when I invited her. If you didn't really have feelings for me, but might have been uncomfortable about Ron and me, I wanted you to have someone you liked to distract you so you didn't feel so bad. I always wanted you to be happy."
"Yeah but what if I'd have taken her hand from the first moment she made eyes at me and took her off to snog?" he asked.
"I would have gone off, cried, and hid from everyone until I figured out how to hex you so your dingus fell off or until I calmed down-which ever came first." She giggled. "When I felt like I could compose myself, I would have told Ron what great guy he was and apologized for being so cruel making him wait for my decision," said Hermione. "Thank goodness that didn't happen. Because I would be in Ginny's room crying right now that I wasn't with you."
"As pretty as Cho is and as much as I really had a crush on her, you are the prettiest, smartest and best friend," said Harry. "There was no way that was happening and I wanted to make that clear."
"I thought you might be sick eating so many pancakes," she giggled with a little emotion being choked back. "That's so sweet of you to say."
"The problem I have with the plan is that it took four years of knowing you for him to get the nerve up to hold your hand," said Harry.
"Oh, and you were worse, smarty pants. If I hadn't lost control at your cute smile you'd be off kissing Cho now," said Hermione with a smile. "Don't think I'm making fun of you, because I know you knew Ron liked me and you were a good friend not to get in the way. That's what I meant when I said I thought we were friends only because he and I were. You were always more of a gentleman; I just don't want you running around breaking your arm patting yourself on the back about how much better you were at getting my affections than he was. All you had to do was smile." She kissed him.
Harry knew he'd just been put in his place, but very nicely. He'd been a wimp about approaching her, but she didn't say it that way.
"But, he does need some inspiration and I think I know how," said Hermione.
They were going to find them and make a little innocent scene about how uncomfortable they were about the way Ron and Cho had gotten so close all of a sudden. Hermione explained that that would be the only time that it might seem a little awkward. If they could sound realistic, the two of them would at least wonder what they'd done and talk about it.
"They might even think we came up with this as plan to get together with them," said Hermione. "We can't let that happen. We have to get away quick so they don't have access to us until they talk it out. You see what I mean?"
"It sounds pretty iffy to me," said Harry. "I'm not sure Ron's feelings for you were that shallow."
"I know, but we both know that Cho likes you but hasn't had a real reason to think of you as more than a friend. That's in our favor, since technically she might still be interested in finding out if you might still be available. Unlike guys, girls don't think guys fall in love with someone forever. We know you're not always looking for Miss Right; you're usually looking for Miss Right Now."
"And believe me, there's a big difference. I don't know what kind of kisser Ron is, but if they get there and he's any good at all, most girls will sort of melt in a guy's arms if the guy doesn't act like the Giant Squid. I'm living proof with you," she smiled. "Hey the alternative is giving up and waiting for him to get pissed off enough to send me home anyway."
"What happens if he does that anyway to get revenge?" asked Harry.
"Oh, don't worry. He'll here it from me plenty if our plan works. He'll here how I knew he'd be unfaithful anyway and he just proved it," she said. "The guilt there will stop him, but she will be there to comfort him. If it's not working we just have to go home."
"What time is it Harry?" asked Hermione.
It was almost midnight. "Midnight," he said.
"Okay, let's just stir the waters. You go back to his room and tell him Cho's looking for him and I'll tell Cho that I wish she'd go talk to you for me because I feel so bad for him. I'll tell her not to tell you because you'd be furious," schemed Hermione.
"What happens if this backfires?" asked Harry.
"We change our names to Romeo and Juliet and poison each other, of course," she said giggling. "What's the worst that can happen Harry? They have a nice conversation, hate us and we see each other again in a month. If it works, we get to snog and goof off together for almost a week."
"Good point," said Harry. "Maybe this will mean Ron will forgive us before we are as old as Professor Dumbledore."
"Yeah, isn't that right?" she snickered. "Okay, let's try it. They should be awake."
Harry was prepared for the worst. He knew he needed to act a little indignant about Cho looking for him. Ron had to think it was irritating. He'd grab a pillow and a blanket from the room and say he'd sleep on the sofa in the living room.
Harry cleared his throat so Ron knew he was coming. "I need to get a pillow and a blanket to go sleep on the sofa, I'll be out of your hair in a second," said Harry. Then a brilliant thought popped in his head. "Cho was looking for you. You can't be too broken up about Hermione and me if you're sneaking off to snog a girl in the middle of the night."
"Oh, yeah right. Just get the stuff and go," said Ron less hostilely than his sneer would have indicated. "Where was she?"
"Downstairs, genius. Do you think I came from upstairs?" said Harry trying to be as irritated by it as he could.
"Piss off, Harry. She's a good kisser you know. Probably better than Hermione anyway," he said. "You can have her. You know what? If you're just going to go to sleep just sleep here and shut up. I'll be back later after you've gone to sleep. That way I know you and Hermione aren't sneaking off in my house either."
"Oh, nice. You're so worried about us snogging that you'll chase after my leftovers," said Harry not having to feign his annoyance now.
"Leftovers. She said she only came because she felt sorry for you. So, any kiss you got was a sympathy kiss. So, eat your heart out. Wouldn't Hermione be pissed to hear you going on about Cho," said Ron with an arrogant smile.
Harry really didn't care about what Cho had said, but he was annoyed that he had to play along with their plan to help him with Cho when he acted like that. It took a second, but he realized the plan just might work and that it was so-far-so-good, even if it didn't feel good at the moment. He was glad for the bed though. The sofa was lumpy.
Twenty minutes later, he heard Hermione outside the door. "Psst, Harry, Har-ry!" she whispered as loudly as she could without waking anyone. "They're talking out at the table. Come to the door."
Harry opened the door and pulled out his invisibility cloak. "Sh. Keep this around your shoulders and pull it over your head if he comes back."
"How do I get out?" she asked.
"I'll get up to go to the loo, you sneak out with it on behind me when I open the door," he said.
"So, what were they saying?" asked Harry.
"Cho was actually kind of sweet. She confided that she thought Ron was sweet, so I told her the plan. She's going to help us Harry," said Hermione.
"Oh, that sucks Hermione," said Harry. "What if he finds out she's just playing along to another game and she really doesn't like him."
"Harry, I'm not sure that will be a problem. I think she really wants a nice laid back guy for a good friend. She's tired of all the false ones who bug her and she thinks Ron is cute in all his shyness. They're not ready to get a room together yet, but she doesn't think he's a creep either." Hermione smiled. "Maybe there's someone out there looking out for all of us Harry."
"That would be nice. I don't want to go back to that house alone when I know I could be here with you," said Harry.
"Harry, I love you, but I don't want to get caught here. That could spoil things," she kissed him and let him open the door pretending to go to the loo. She dropped the cloak when they were sure was clear and ran up to Ginny's room. Harry picked up the cloak and carried it to the loo and back quickly to maintain the charade. He sighed in relief and drifted off to sleep.
The next morning Harry got up to find Hermione sitting in the kitchen with Cho. They both smiled almost sadly at him. He didn't know how to react. He just went and gave Hermione a kiss on the cheek and said good morning to both of them. He grabbed a glass of orange juice and went outside. He didn't feel like sitting with the two of them together. Hermione followed.
"What's wrong Harry?" she asked. "Cho's fine. We're not like best friends sharing notes or anything." She paused. "Well, we are a bit about Ron. He left this morning with his Dad to go to the Ministry and then Hogwarts."
"It's something else, isn't it then?" asked Harry. He felt uneasy about something. The two of them didn't look like two girls about to run off and snog the new guys in their lives.
"Well, only half of our plan worked, Harry. They're going to spend time this summer getting to know each other. She'll come here some and he'll meet her there some. We were just talking though and it seems Ron is going to go with his Dad to see if Dumbledore will change his mind and make you come to Hogwarts for the rest of the week and send me home," she said with tears growing in her eyes.
"You have to be kidding me?" said Harry.
"She said he'd already talked to his Dad before she and Ron talked last night. He and Mr. Weasley agreed it would best for everyone," said Hermione. "I'm so sad Harry." She did cry like it was the end of the world but it was sad and her eyes were far from dry.
His eyes misted as well. He was both angry and sad. He was angry that Ron was going to Dumbledore rather than to him and his Dad together. If Dumbledore made a decision against Harry there was no changing it. But if Harry had had the opportunity to plead with Mr. Weasley, it might not have happened this way. There was no way, Harry would be sent home to Privet Drive alone this way and he knew it. Maybe Hermione could make excuses to come to Hogwarts. And, then he realized there was no way Professor Dumbledore would allow two sweethearts access to Gryffindor Tower without all the other children and all the teachers there to keep them honest.
"When will we know?" asked Harry.
"It shouldn't be too long. Cho says that they left early and it's not that far with an adult wizard guiding the way. They don't need to use the Hogwarts Express to get there. He is Dad could get there and back through the Floo within a few hours," said Hermione.
"Hermione, let's just go somewhere. I mean let's go somewhere where we can have fun today. Maybe even for the rest of the week," said Harry.
"How do we get out of here though?" asked Hermione. "Money?"
"How far is town?" he asked. "I can change money at Gringott's we can get there before anyone realizes we're gone for more than the afternoon and start looking."
"Not far really," answered Hermione with a little more energy.
"Well, that's good enough. We can fool around there. Maybe we'll find the bus to London or something and go to Gringott's then. "If we have to we can run away. I don't want to be without you this week. I can't take it. When they find us, fine, I'll go. But they'll have to find us. Heck, we could fly off on the broom when it gets dark even. You could come back and I'll sneak back to get you. I don't care, but I'm going to spend more than one day with the girl I love."
She threw her arms around him. "You know you're the only guy in the world I'd do this with, don't you?"
"I hope so. I might get kicked out of school for flying on the broom without proper permission, but I don't care. Let's get out of here," said Harry.
Hermione went to Ginny's room and nonchalantly took whatever she could get in her purse that could possibly help them. Ginny seemed disinterested so she grabbed her backpack too and packed it. "What are you doing?" asked Ginny.
"Well, it's obvious, isn't it?" asked Hermione feigning tears. "Ron's gotten your father to send me home and they're gone to get Dumbledore to make Harry leave too. So I'm packing," she said.
"That git. I was afraid he'd try to get revenge like that," said Ginny. "I'm sorry."
"I'll just be downstairs," she said as she hauled everything down.
Mrs. Weasley was busy doing other things and was generally pretty disgusted with both of them over the incident so she said `hi' very curtly and kept working.
Harry was outside with the broom wrapped in the invisibility cloak and his backpack on his back. Hermione had put hers on too. "You know what Harry. I don't care. I love you. If we have to stay hidden for a few days, so what, right?" she said in an obvious effort to convince herself.
"That's right," said Harry.
They set off across the large meadow toward Ottery St. Catchpole holding hands--just happy to be together.
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