Hopelessly Addicted
Chapter 5
"Breathless"
.
Carve your name into my arm
Instead of stressed, I lie here charmed
'Cause there's nothing else to do
Every me and every you...
Placebo, "Every You Every Me"
.
Lily had never been in this situation before. She hadn't known it was possible to be this agitated while talking about regular mission schemes. James was rambling about different types of Shielding Charms, but they were both aware of how difficult it was to focus on the matter at hand. After all, they were leaning over the same desk with the blueprint, and every abrupt movement caused them to brush against each other.
It was hard to explain what went on in Lily's body once that happened. The tension accumulated in the past two hours from being with James while trying not to think about him seemed to fizzle and magnify what little contact the two had had. Her mind was running wild with ideas and memories of all sorts.
James was in a similar state, if not worse. A mere glance informed Lily of just how keyed up he felt, but he was pointedly avoiding looking at her. She was thankful for that; his hungry, unabashed stare wouldn't help matters at all. The fact that he had changed into a wifebeater was also disquieting. Oh, why didn't he do something about this?
"It would make sense to use the Russian variation of the Gallic model. After all, if it effectively blocks radiation, it'll probably give us a good head start in case we have unwanted visitors."
"Yeah." Lily sighed, forcing herself to think reasonably. "There's only one problem: I don't know whether you've ever had to cast one of those, but they're extremely complex, and it'll take a skilled wizard at least four very tiring hours to complete it. We can't afford to waste that much time, considering we'll need six big shields."
"Yes, I know. The one underground is bound to be a headache. But maybe it's worth it?"
She shrugged. "We could use night shifts."
"That may work."
Then Lily had an idea. It was perfect-it would take her mind most effectively off everything. They could argue! She only had to provoke him into getting aggravated. That had always been their favourite pastime, after all.
"Stop doing this!" she shrieked suddenly. "Bloody hell, James, can't you behave normally? It was your decision not to get on with things in the first place, so why won't you leave me alone?"
He blinked. Her insane outburst had stunned him more than anything. "I'm not doing anything."
"Oh, sure you're not," she growled. "Maybe we should work in separate rooms or something. We really have a job to do, and you know it's serious."
"Don't you think you're overreacting? I'm not even looking at you!"
Lily could see that her plan was working. Although he didn't want to, James was beginning to get angry with her. "No, you're not-on purpose. You're trying to affect me in some way, and I'm in no mood to put up with your ruddy mind games."
"Are you bipolar or what?" James exploded at last. "Just half an hour ago you were nearly begging for it! If I'm aroused and whatnot, Lily, it's your fault, too! You want it and you know you want it, and why are we even arguing?"
She glowered at him and said nothing, mostly because she could think of no proper answer. He was right, of course.
"I know we have a job to do, and that's the only reason I'm standing here discussing Russian charms when my mind is clearly somewhere else. You could at least appreciate the effort." He paused, and continued spitefully, "At least I'm not breathing heavily and jumping every time our elbows or whatever touch and remind you of what we can't do. I'm trying to think of work; you're not."
"Why won't you just listen?" she said through clenched teeth. In a way, Lily felt truly angry with him for doing this to her. She wasn't used to being entirely powerless against anyone, let alone an annoying man like him.
In a strange impulse, she took a step forward and, taking James entirely by surprise, dug her nails deep into his bare arm. His eyes widened as she moved her hand downwards, leaving behind four red lines with occasional blood beads.
That had been a wrong decision: Lily realised it the moment his startled gaze met hers. Arguing with her was the last thing on his mind now; her gesture had had completely unforeseen consequences. Surely she couldn't have forgotten how fond he was of her nails and of the expertise with which she usually employed them. The unbearable tension that had overwhelmed them all evening was almost at breaking point when he breathed out, "Don't-do that."
Her phony anger disappeared once she noticed what had happened, and Lily's frown became an amused smirk. She obediently took a step backwards, and observed his ineffective attempts to calm down.
"Lily," he said levelly, with remarkable self-control, "see what you can do about organising those shifts. I'll go and have a quick shower and be back in a minute."
She laughed, clearly feeling no pity. It was almost too easy to drive James out of his mind. No matter what he said, his sorry shape was always more evident than hers could ever be.
.
You make me dizzy, running circles in my head
One of these days I'll chase you down
Well, look who's going crazy now
We're face to face, my friend...
Foo Fighters, "Breakout"
.
James turned to leave, but changed his mind before walking away. His friends were right: he had to do this soon, or else he would start obsessing over Lily. Whether or not he had already gotten to that point was debatable, but if this hellish anxiety continued, he would be a sad sight before long.
He faced her. They stood there, ridiculously close yet hesitant, for a moment. Lily felt as though James was giving her a last opportunity to escape or say no before the situation got out of control. She did nothing, unable to breathe or think and almost scared of her own excitement.
Abruptly, James' hands were on her waist, pulling her closer, and they were kissing with unsurprising desperation. Her fingers clutched his neck and ran through his hair, tugging it. Their bodies pressed against each other, touching in places Lily couldn't single out even if she wanted to do so.
She bit his lower lip with strength she didn't bother controlling, and let one of her hands roam James' lower back, scratching him. Within seconds, her blouse, bra and his shirt had somehow found their way to the other side of the room. Lily wasn't sure the cracking noise she'd heard after tossing away his glasses meant there would be shards everywhere, but it was difficult to care.
A part of James' mind couldn't believe he was actually going through with this. Everything seemed tad surreal; the reckless half-naked woman he was about to shag didn't resemble his colleague much.
He thought he had forgotten the details of Lily's body, her smell and the way she moved, but he had not. She had matured, but was still essentially the same teenager whose dorm he used to sneak into several times a week. All in all, the situation was far too familiar for both of them to allow any sort of awkwardness. It felt natural to pick up where they had once left off.
James tried to unbutton Lily's pants, failing miserably. After another attempt, he grunted a curse against her lips. She then realised his predicament and, chuckling, moved a few inches away from him to do it herself.
"Have I ever mentioned I hate jeans?" he asked with a grin, sitting on the floor. "They're the most unpractical and uncomfortable type of clothing Muggles have ever invented."
"Mm-hmm," Lily agreed, kneeling directly in front of James and waiting.
He leaned over and kissed her neck-softly at first, and afterwards with such intensity that it became hard to pick apart his bites. He then began toying with her breasts, circling her nipples with the tip of his tongue. Lily reached down to open his pants, and lightly scraped her nails on his abdomen while doing so.
All of a sudden, James pinned Lily down, holding her arms to the ground far above her head. He kept his eyes fixed on hers as his hand made its way to her underwear, teasingly stroking her thighs.
"You know," Lily noted conversationally, "we're not too far from the door, and people will start arriving soon."
"Yeah."
"We should really-" She stopped talking, gasping as James' fingers reached their intended destination. He moved with deliberate slowness, fully realising how much that would bother Lily.
He smirked. "We should what? Not make too much noise? Oh, I agree."
Lily tried not to be too distracted, not to let her eyelids shut of their own accord, not to allow her body to show him exactly how she felt-to no avail. She knew her legs trembling slightly, and that he could see it. Her panting increasingly resembled stifled moaning, which wasn't far from the truth. She wanted to scratch him, yell at him, do anything to make James act faster, but he was in no hurry, and she was immobilised.
.
From you I cannot hide, and I've lost my will to try
Can't hide it; can't fight it
So go on, go on, come on-leave me breathless
Tempt me, tease me, till I can't deny this loving feeling...
The Corrs, "Breathless"
.
Hours had gone by-or so it seemed to Lily-since they had started. She was about to cry out of sheer desperation. How had James had the patience and the self-discipline to tease her for so long? In the back of her mind, she admitted enjoying this helplessness, but on the whole it was an annoying situation.
"James," she mumbled, trying to soften the merciless look on his face with her pleading tone, "please. We don't even have much time."
"It hasn't been that long," he replied, circling her earlobe with his tongue and continuing downwards. Lily's fingers quivered as she tried to push away the hand holding her arms in place, and her back involuntarily arched. She was extremely dizzy by now, and could hardly control her feverish movements.
James seemed to have decided that she had endured enough. His hands began moving with equal pressure but much faster, causing Lily to moan softly.
"Ssh, quiet," he commanded her, his eyes twinkling with mirth. "We have to be able to hear if someone's coming."
"I can't!" Lily groaned. How could he expect her to hear anything? She could hardly pay attention to her own thoughts; there was nothing on her mind other than James, James' movements and what on earth was taking him so long?
She then had an idea and jerked her head as far left as she could. James glanced up in alarm a second after she bit his arm, forcing him to let go. Why hadn't she thought of it earlier? It had been so simple! The downside was, of course, that James had pulled back entirely, shifting to lie beside her.
Lily, however, was no longer in the mood to be passive. She wasn't going to let him play around with her anymore; this powerlessness was downright aggravating. She grabbed his hair and yanked his head, practically forcing his lips down on hers.
He didn't mind the change of rhythm. James intended on continuing now-he needed it as badly as she did-, and he would've done so, too, if a voice outside hadn't called out right then, "Anyone here?"
Lily let out a frustrated growl and tightened her grasp on his hair. "No," she said firmly. "No. You have to finish it, James, you can't..."
James knew Lily wasn't thinking properly-if at all. They had to disappear, and fast. "Amelia's here! She'll enter any time now." He left her on the floor and ran to fetch all their clothes, clutching them in a crumpled heap. "Come, Lily."
She stood and, holding on to his arm for support, ran up the stairs seconds before their work colleague opened the door to the living room.
"I'm sorry," he muttered, meaning it.
Lily nodded.
James leaned forward and kissed her softly. "We'll finish this later; I promise."
She sighed, and grinned. In all likelihood, there would be no time or opportunity to do so tonight, and they were both aware of it. "You should take that shower now. I'll get dressed and meet the girls downstairs."
"Will you be okay?"
Lily laughed. "I'll live. Don't worry."
"I'll meet you downstairs in a few."
.
Nothing much to say, I guess
You're just the same as all the rest
Been trying to throw your arms around the world
And a woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle...
U2, "Tryin' to Throw Your Arms Around the World"
.
Amelia glanced around the living room. With the exception of James' desk, which he had brought from the office earlier that day, it was empty. Dorcas would have a blast choosing the dŽcor but, knowing the conscientious Chief Aurors in charge, it was safe to assume that most of it would not be her choice.
Lily and James had achieved an interesting balance between rigid control and open-mindedness. They allowed their team a reasonable amount of freethinking, but it would be inconceivable for Amelia, Dorcas or Marlene to let an idea develop far too much without checking in with the pair. After all, the girls' job was to come up with spells, potions and other creative solutions to aid the strategists.
Most Aurors loved missions and danger, but not Amelia Bones. She had chosen this office for precisely that reason: they rarely went into the field, and only on high-risk and therefore volunteer-only scenarios. Being behind a desk was what suited her temper the most, especially considering that she had someone else to think of before needlessly endangering her life: her one-year-old son, Daniel.
Thinking of the boy invariably brought a smile to her face. He was just beginning to form his first few words and sentences, and... Oh, she missed him already! Her brother Edgar had agreed to take care of Daniel for the rest of the week, but Amelia would do her best to sneak out of Godric's Hollow for a brief visit.
Within seconds, her mind drifted back to Fabian Prewett. It was expected; she'd grown used to it, after all these years. Thankfully, she was stronger now, and no longer as visibly heartbroken as she once had been. Oh, of course Amelia still jumped from time to time when overhearing his name, and obsessively avoided running into him anywhere.
"Hey!" a cheerful voice greeted her from the staircase. Amelia turned to face Lily, and was surprised to see a woman that hardly resembled the tidy, classy Chief Auror. This Lily Evans was disheveled, sweaty and wearing clothes with which she wouldn't be caught dead in on a regular weekday.
"The place is great," Amelia remarked with a smile, actually anticipating the task ahead of them. "I can't wait to start!"
"James and I think we'll need a Russian Shielding Charm. Have you ever done one of those?"
She made a face. "Yes. It's quite possibly the most obnoxious spell I've ever had the displeasure to learn, but it's reliable. Good thinking!"
"I've started some of the basic protections in the yard, but I think that should be our greatest concern at the moment: both shields and concealments, taking advantage of the fact that it's already dark."
"You're right. I guess we're looking at two all-nighters each, right?"
"At the very least! Well, I think most of us can manage to cast the shield alone. The amount of wizards doing it makes little difference, as you know-the main problem is time, which we don't have. We'll come up with some shift plans."
"Is James coming soon?"
"Yeah, he's upstairs."
"What should we do now? Have you finished drawing the scenario?"
"No, we haven't." Lily sighed. "Let's go and take a look at the yard."
They went outside. The chilly evening wind caused her to shiver and rub her arms. When had the weather got this cold? Lily then remembered that James had mentioned something about the heating being awry; she hadn't noticed, but it had probably something to do with the preparation spells she'd cast on windows earlier that day.
"We could use the trees," Amelia suggested, pointing to the tall vegetation surrounding the property.
Lily nodded. "We were thinking of putting some regular detection spells around the place, but surveillance will have to be our main goal. There's a control room in the house from which we'll see everything that happens in and around it."
"Do you think we'll have time to finish everything by Friday?"
"Thursday, actually," Lily corrected her, and shrugged. "We have to, so we will."
.
I might take you home
We might make out when nobody's there
It's not that we're scared
It's just that it's delicate...
Damien Rice, "Delicate"
.
Lily stumbled in the room, searching for her pyjamas and sheets to cover the bed. It was almost six in the morning, and she was absolutely drained after having spent hours reinforcing every wall in the second floor. She grabbed the first long T-shirt she saw-it happened to be one of James'-and sloppily threw one sheet from the pile unfolded on the bed.
Dumbledore had been kind to lend them some spare furniture. All Hogwarts beds felt familiar and blissfully comfortable; Lily's eyelids shut of their own accord the moment her back touched the mattress, and she fell asleep.
Lily had no idea of how long she'd slept until James entered. She woke up with a jolt when he accidentally let the door slam. The windows were wide open, sunlight flooded the place, and she buried her face in the pillow.
"I'm sorry, Lily," he said, taking off his shirt. "Go back to sleep."
"Your bag is over there," she mumbled, pointing to a corner. "Did you finish it?"
"Almost." James' voice betrayed his exhaustion, and he continued debating work with her out of sheer habit, barely thinking before talking. "All the windows downstairs are done, and most of the walls. Do you think we need to worry about the floor, too, considering we'll cover the ground underneath it later?"
"It wouldn't hurt. Would you mind closing the curtains?"
He grinned, changing into sweatpants. "There are no curtains."
"Oh. Can you conjure some?"
James muttered a spell and a milky-white sheet covered the window, blocking out the light. She yawned, and gathered up the courage to open her eyes and face him. She only then realised that they weren't, in fact, supposed to be staying in the same room. "Why are you sleeping here?"
"Well," he pointed out amusedly, "all my stuff is here. You just happen to be on my bed, for reasons I can't quite fathom, but I'm not complaining. Why? Do you mind?"
"Of course not. I'm sorry; I thought I'd chosen this room for me."
"I said it's all right. How are things outside?" James called out from the bathroom.
"The preliminary's stuff's all done, and I've begun Transfiguring the tree leaves and casting the surveillance charms on the fence."
Despite the toothpaste in his mouth, Lily thought she heard James ask something that vaguely resembled, "Did you tell Amelia to water everything with the Drought of the Living Dead?" and replied, "Yeah. Did you figure out what was wrong with the heat?"
"Ah, that spell of yours was preventing not only images and sound but also heat waves from leaving through the glass windows. It's fixed now." He lay beside her, groaning. "I can't believe I'm actually going to sleep."
She smiled. "I have to get up soon. Do you know what time it is?"
"It's eight, or almost that."
"Okay. Good night, James."
Instead of sleeping, he turned to gaze at her pensively. Lily shifted uneasily for a moment before following suit, examining his face with a puzzled frown.
"What's the matter?"
"Why were you avoiding me today?"
She blinked. "I wasn't-"
"Yes, you were. You were working outside all night, and used Amelia to send me messages. You could've come just as easily, and it would've spared her the trouble."
"You could've come talk to me, too, but you sent Dorcas."
"Well, I didn't know what was wrong."
Lily rolled her eyes. "What did you think was wrong?"
"You didn't want to be reminded of what happened last night, obviously, but I wasn't sure why: do you regret having done it, or not having finished it?"
"A bit of both, I suppose, but-" she sighed, "I guess it was bound to happen at some point, even though I didn't really see it coming."
"Okay, so you wanted to avoid me because you were afraid I was going to assault you or something?" He grinned. "Ah, no, you knew I wasn't going to do it, and that was the problem. I see."
Lily chuckled, and said nothing. James knew he was right, and there was no point in feeding his ego even more. His presence would've been an unwelcome distraction, considering the amount of work she had set out to do that evening. In a way, she did feel remorse for having started this insane, aimless and potentially disastrous liaison.
"Oh, no, no, don't start thinking about it now," he warned her, guessing her trail of thought. "I've done all the reasoning, and believe me, it leads to nowhere fun. Plus, we both know it's inevitable, so why bother? We just need to find some free time when we're not this knocked out."
"How can you be this self-assured? I could very well change my mind."
"But you're not going to," he shrugged. "I saw how you were last night, Lily. Either your boyfriend's been doing a terrible job for months or you've given me more thought than you care to admit. In any case-"
Lily felt a sudden surge of frustration. How could he be so nonchalant about this? He just assumed she'd be willing to do whatever he wanted, whenever he felt like he had time to spare!
"Look, I-"
He put a finger on her lips and moved his head a bit down to level with hers. "I'm sure this upsets you. Hell, it upsets me too, for similar reasons; it helps remind me that I'm still vulnerable, human and a shitty boyfriend for being so willing to cheat on Julia. But we're both really, really tired. We can debate this for hours, and we'll never reach an ethical agreement of any sort. We're wrong and fucked up, we know it, and that doesn't change a thing."
Lily threw him a contemplative look. "When did you get this cynical?"
"I didn't. I'm just..." James sighed, turned belly-up and slid his arm under her head, pulling her towards him. Lily soon found herself lying snugly on the chest of her sleeping partner.
She lightly scraped his chest with her index finger, mulling over what James had said. It was useless to lie to herself: Lily had to accept the starting point that she did want to be with James, at least for the time being. With that established, there wasn't much more to discuss. They were both obstinate enough not to give up on the idea. It was, like James had said, just a matter of time.
.
Like any hot-blooded woman
I have simply wanted an object to crave
But you, you're not allowed
You're uninvited-an unfortunate slight...
Alanis Morissette, "Uninvited"
.
Lily hadn't felt herself drift off. She did, however, realise that doing so had been a bad idea when a barely conscious part of her noticed Amelia opening the door to find her two bosses lying together, half-naked. Startled, the Auror recoiled to stand outside, well out of the couple's line of sight.
"Lily?" she called in a audibly embarassed tone. "It's almost time for your shift."
Lily sat up immediately in alarm, cursing herself for forgetting to lock the door. Oh, bugger that-she shouldn't have slept with James when surrounded by their colleagues, period! What sort of message would this send? People would assume that the two had been involved all along, and it wouldn't take long for the rumours to spread.
A nagging tingle in the back of Lily's head reminded her that stories would have surfaced at some point anyway. Now at least she would know where they came from.
"I'll be there in a minute," she replied, glancing at James. He remained asleep, unaware of the situation. It was useless to wake him, of course, so she began searching for suitable clothes. After settling for oversized wizard robes-if only James weren't several inches taller, this would've been so much easier-, she snuck out of the room.
There was an empty room twenty feet away: empty, that is, except for the bare bed and the backpack in which Lily had brought her things. She credited the previous night's dimness to the lack of sleep, and swore to herself not to make that sort of mistake again any time soon.
Several minutes later, Lily descended the stairs to find Amelia still awake, sitting on the floor by the nearest window.
"Good morning, Lily," she greeted, clearly having decided that not mentioning a thing was the safest course of action. "I've finished shielding the back of the house, as per your instructions, but daylight caught me off guard; I didn't have time to wrap up the leaves thing. Dorcas did the front, and just went to sleep."
"Don't worry; I'll see what I can do."
"All right. I'm off to bed, then."
Lily shifted uncomfortably from one foot to the other, thinking fast. Was it better to talk to her about it now, before she had the chance to tell anyone else?
Despite working with Amelia, Dorcas and Marlene on a daily basis, Lily didn't know them beyond superficial office interaction. It was one of the downsides of working with James: he demanded that so much of her energy that she had little or no time to focus on the other team members.
It was probably safer to say something. "Listen, Amelia, about what you saw-"
"It's none of my business," she hurried to reply. "You guys are on the same level, so no one can argue coercion, promotion hunger or anything. It's really none of my business."
"Well, yes, but it may interfere with the team's balance, don't you think? That can sort of makes it everyone's concern."
Amelia sobered up, and examined Lily's face attentively for a moment. She then asked, "How long has this been going on?"
"It... hasn't. It was just a crazy thing that happened last night."
"Right."
Her incredulous tone surprised Lily. "I'm serious."
"All this time, you weren't-not once?"
"No!"
Amelia was taken aback. Like the rest of the team, she had assumed, in a somewhat vague and theoretical way, that the two Chief Aurors had been involved for the past weeks. If they hadn't, it was long overdue, and no evil could come from that.
"Oh," Amelia said. "I guess all I can say is...it took you long enough. I don't think any of the girls will mind, believe me."
"You all thought we were having an affair? Why?"
She smiled apologetically. "It seemed logical! You two argue over every little thing, and in the morning often act like nothing's wrong... You stay in the office together every night, and get significantly less work done during that time than in the afternoon... I don't know. You give off that vibe, you know?"
Lily shook her head, baffled. She was now sure that she should have spent more time talking to her team. "Have you guys talked about this to anyone else?"
"Sure! It's the biggest gossip at the Ministry at the moment. They've got ongoing bets and everything."
The Chief Auror's eyes widened in shock. Her mind reeled with the most relevant implication of that fact: it wouldn't be long before Julia found out. Cringing inwardly, she kneeled on the floor.
"Relax!" Amelia raised an eyebrow. "I was joking. Of course no one knows; we don't have much contact with Ministry Aurors to begin with, and we know both of you have other relationships to worry about. I can't be sure no rumours whatsoever have leaked-you know how these things are-but I'm pretty certain that you're safe for now."
"And we hadn't even done anything," Lily mused disbelievingly. "I don't want to think of what can happen now that there's actually some truth in all that."
"Why don't you break up with your boyfriend? What's his name again?"
"Alain-Alain Delacour." She rubbed her temples with a sigh: even talking about him nowadays irritated her, despite the fact that they hadn't spoken in days. Lily couldn't bear the thought of Alain when her mind would much rather be occupied with the likes of James Potter. "I don't know. I've been considering that; not because of James, of course. Alain just belongs to this whole other world, another phase in my life, and I feel like I'm past it already."
"You two have been together for about two years, right?"
Lily nodded.
"Do you love him?"
"I guess...not, probably, but I had long since decided to get married to him. He's a great guy."
"Oh, don't do that to yourself." Amelia grimaced. "It's bloody torture after a short while."
She was evidently speaking from experience, and Lily's interest was piqued. "Why do you say that?"
"I was married to this Muggle a few years ago. It was fine at first, but I simply didn't like him enough. Soon even the friendship wears out, if not much was there to begin with, and everything becomes unbearable."
"But why did you do it?"
"I-" Amelia hesitated, flustered, and wondered whether it was wise to open up to Lily, who, all things considered, was little more than a stranger. "Do you remember Fabian Prewett?"
"Of course. You used to date him, right?"
"Yeah. We lived together throughout Auror training, despite his father's objections-Mr. Prewett had something against my father, who had already died at that point. We were engaged and everything, but the old man managed to pull some strings and convince all the Chief Aurors not to hire me once I graduated."
"I remember he was a major big-shot a while ago--Head of Internal Affairs, wasn't he?"
"Exactly. He was a great politician. Aurors shouldn't be allowed to do politics," Amelia scowled. "It's got nothing to do with our profession. But that's just wishful thinking- anyway, the truth was that he did all that he could to prevent Fabian from staying with me, but didn't succeed."
She ran her fingers through her hair and bit her lower lip, presumably to keep from crying.
"And then he was killed. Fabian, being the sentimental fool I'd always known him to be, felt guilty for countering his dead father's wishes and dumped me. I got married to whoever a year later, and divorced not long afterwards."
"Is Daniel your ex-husband's son?"
"He thinks he is." Amelia chuckled giddily all of a sudden, much to Lily's surprise. "Merlin, I don't even know why I'm telling you all this... Listen, don't tell a soul, all right? Few people know, and I definitely can't risk Fabian finding out anytime soon."
Lily nodded.
"So... Why did we start talking about this again? Ah, right, your French guy. Don't be daft, Lily: James and London are far more interesting, and this is where you belong. You seem even happier now than you did when you first got here-although that may have something to do with James."
"It doesn't."
Amelia smiled, not entirely sure whether she could trust Lily on this. "All right, then. I'm going to sleep; I'm beat. Good night!"
.
Some girls are all about it
Some girls, they love to let it fly
Some girls, no doubt about it
Some girls are born to make you cry...
Aerosmith, "Girls of Summer"
.
It was soon past midnight again. Lily had spent the entire day working around the house, while James went out from time to time to run errands. All sorts of annoying problems had come up: he had been called to testify in a Wizengamot trial the following day, the French Ministry had sent over detailed instructions that conflicted with the original plan in every single aspect, Amelia's son had come down with a bad cold and she'd had to go home...
Just for a change, Lily felt rather tired. Her wrist ached from all the swish-and-flick, and her head swam with the odours from the cauldrons surrounding her. Before casting the shielding spell-which would take her the best part of six hours, in all likelihood-, Lily decided to look for James. He'd taken the graveyard shift that night as well, and was in charge of shielding the top of the house.
She found him in the backyard, furiously writing on a scrap of paper and oblivious to her presence.
"Who's avoiding whom now?" Lily joked with a smile, sitting beside him.
James scoffed. "I had things to do! Why on earth would I avoid you anyway? It's not like I'm even trying." He pulled her into his lap with a goofy grin. "See? Not trying."
She brought her hand forward to stop them from being too close-a clear sign that she intended on talking, and nothing more. "How was your day?"
"It was...boring. Come here," he commanded, lifting her chin and kissing her despite knowing that she seemed not to want it. Naturally, the pleasant warmth of his body was welcoming, and she had been deprived of such contact since the previous night; Lily was tempted to put off work for a while longer. Following a pattern that was beginning to feel all too familiar, she clung to his neck and surrendered to his wishes, pushing James to lie beneath her.
"We seem to have this thing with places where we're likely to get caught," he noted. It was an observation Lily could have analysed with some seriousness, had it not been mumbled in her ear in a manner that indicated without a doubt that the fact pleased James immensely.
His lips moved fast, and she lazily threw her head to the side as he made his way down her neck to bite her shoulder with surprising intensity. For a few hazy minutes, neither was sure of what transpired, lost in a tangled confusion of bites, gropes and almost overly aggressive kisses-if such a thing were even possible.
Lily knew she had felt distinctively angry with him at some point: frustrated for having let herself get to this point, but even more furious at him for somehow convincing her to do so. She didn't know where the rage had come from, nor did she give it any thought; Lily was happy to take it out on him, and James would likely need to see a Healer the following day to prevent any scarring.
"Stop," she blurted out all of a sudden, her tone inferring earnestness. James could not, therefore, ignore her protest as he normally would, had it been a half-hearted gasp. He froze at once, and waited. "This-this is crazy."
This wasn't the adequate time for Lily to go through a crisis of conscience. Women, James grumbled inwardly, were far too complicated and annoying. He said nothing, preparing himself for the diatribe that was bound to follow. It would probably have the mood-killer effect of an ice-cold water spell.
"We have a lot to do," she said, sitting up and nervously tucking some of her disarrayed hair behind her ear. Lily had to remind herself that she was doing the right thing, the responsible thing. The forlorn look in James' eyes would not weaken her resolve. "We can't just choose to put it all aside and shag in the backyard!"
"It doesn't have to take long; what difference can a few minutes make?"
"We both know we only have until dawn. It's hardly enough time as it is."
She had a point, and James was forced to acknowledge it, despite his every instinct begging him to do otherwise. He could still pull her back to him and change her mind, of course, and that made the situation even worse for him. Lily was ultimately compelling him to make the correct decision; there was no other viable option.
Not for the first-or last-time, Lily cursed herself for getting involved with the one man with whom she worked on a daily basis. What would happen if this liaison of theirs, whatever it was, went on for some time? Soon pressing responsibilities wouldn't hold them down with this effectiveness; the situation was difficult enough as it was.
"All right," James breathed out, taking the hand she'd offered for support and pushing himself to an upright position. "I should get flying and start the charm, I guess, and you need to begin the underground one. I'm sure there's a top-bottom joke in there somewhere, but-"
Lily raised an eyebrow. They grinned.
"I'll see you later."
.
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A/N Oh, *headdesk* I keep forgetting to update this fic here. You guys should check out unknowableroom dot org, seriously, it's got, like, five new chapters. Anyway, I'll update them here soon, promise :)