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Worth the Effort by JayR
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Worth the Effort

JayR

Chapter 6

Harry had come to love weekends. It meant Hermione and Andrew would be most likely spending the day with him. Kate was fine as a companion, but it felt odd to be an adult with a minder. He knew she was a nurse; however the lessons made it seem more like he was being treated as a child. He missed practicing magic. He didn't understand why they'd stopped. He knew there was a reason for it, but he couldn't remember what that was.

Harry peeked into Hermione's darkened bedroom. He saw her there sleeping, her face lit by the light of the breaking sunlight. She looked so very beautiful, so peaceful. The lines of worry that usually marred her face were gone. Knowing he was the cause of those lines, he resolved to work harder at getting better.

He looked across toward the cot where Andrew was quietly playing and smiled. Andrew looked up and saw him and beamed back at him. Harry held a finger to his lips, and then pointed at the sleeping woman in the bed. The child returned the gesture and raised his arms to be picked up. Harry walked in and lifted the boy, stealthily grabbed a few necessities and closed the door quietly behind him.

"Mum seepin,'" said Andrew as Harry carried him toward the loo.

"Yes, she's tired. We should let her have a lie in," responded Harry.

Harry quickly changed and dressed the squirming boy before heading down to the kitchen. Placing the boy in the highchair, he grabbed a handful of cereal and put it on the tray. He knew he only had a few more minutes before he would become distracted and mentally cursed his limitations. I should have left him with his mum, he thought to himself, I can't watch him properly.

Kate entered to find Harry struggling to maintain clarity. "I can take over for now, Harry. Clear your mind…that's it…just drift…you'll be back with us in a few…"

Harry did as he was told. After a few minutes he opened his eyes. "Thanks," he mumbled.

"No problem," the nurse answered as she began to prepare breakfast. "What does this strapping young lad want for breakfast this morning? Toast…kippers…an omelet, perhaps?"

"Nothing for me, thanks…" said Harry glumly.

"You've got to eat something, coffee and toast? Tea?"

"Nothing, thanks," Harry said more sternly and slammed from the room.

Hermione bustled into the kitchen, frantically looking for her son. Her features softened upon seeing his jelly-smeared face.

"Mum seepin'," he said around the bits of toast he was chewing.

She raked a loving hand through his hair and found more jelly. "Yes, I was. Andrew must have been up early this morning…"

Andrew grinned and picked up another bit of toast as Kate explained, "Harry changed him and brought him down."

"Is that safe?" Hermione asked, not really wanting to hear the answer. While she greatly enjoyed having a lie in, she didn't want to endanger her son or cause his father any problems.

"He did fine," Kate reassured her. "He had his nappy changed and dressed him. He must have felt himself slipping because he put him in the chair and gave him some cereal to occupy him until he could gather himself."

"Where is Harry now?"

"If my guess is correct, he'll be in his room feeling sorry for himself…"

Hermione looked toward the ceiling. "I'd better…"

"No, your omelet is ready. The worst thing you could do right now is baby him. He'll come to his own realizations and come back down. Or a more probable scenario, is that he will have forgotten why he was upset and he'll come back and join us as usual.

At that point, Harry strode through the door. "Good morning," he called as he poured himself a cup of coffee. Taking a sip, he grimaced. "Do I normally drink this stuff?"

"No, Harry, you are more of a tea drinker. You like tea and pumpkin juice in the morning…" stated Hermione. "I'm the one that likes coffee."

"Makes sense," he said as he glanced around. "Er…"

"I'll get it for you," said Hermione rising. She added, "You can get the juice from the fridge…"

"Yeah, I'll do that…" Harry said as he walked to the refrigerator. He looked inside for a long time.

"I just love that blue pitcher, don't you?" Kate said.

"Yes, it has to be the nicest pitcher for pumpkin juice! The others I tried just didn't keep it chilled as nicely."

Harry spotted the blue jug, grabbed it and closed the door. He poured himself a large glass and drained it. "This is good!" he said wiping his mouth. "Have I had it before?"

"Yes," stated Kate. "I believe it is a staple for all Hogwarts students…"

"Hogwarts is where we went to school, Harry…" explained Hermione in response to his confused look.

"Oh, that's the place with the four poster beds, right?" Harry remembered aloud.

Hermione beamed at him. "Yes, it is!"

"I had a dream," Harry explained. "Ron was there, right? His bed was across from mine."

"I believe it was, Harry! That is so amazing!" Hermione gushed excitedly.

"What?" asked Harry. He had no idea what she was talking about. He figured he must have missed something again.

"Nothing," Kate said in a casual tone. "We were just discussing your dream about Hogwarts…" then to Hermione she mouthed, "Too much…it overwhelmed him."

"Hogwarts?" asked Harry. "What in the bloody hell is a Hogwarts?"

"Buddy Bell!! Buddy Bell!!" gurgled a giggling Andrew.

Hermione placed her hand over the boy's sticky mouth to indicate he wasn't to repeat it again.

"Hogwarts is where you went to school, Harry…" Kate explained in a tone that indicated that she would accept no foolishness.

"I don't remember it…" admitted Harry.

"None of it?" asked Hermione as she got Andrew from his chair. She led the boy over to the sink and washed his hands and face with a flannel she kept there.

Harry thought hard and wondered why he couldn't remember a school he'd supposedly attended.

"That's alright, Harry," soothed Kate before Harry could get upset. "I'm sure it'll come to you later."

"Why?" Harry asked clearly lost.

"Because I said so," answered Kate. She served him his omelet and toast and directed him to sit.

Harry sat at the table and stared at the omelet. He picked up his fork and attempted to cut into the fluffy eggs. His fork slipped and the omelet slid into his lap. He swore viciously. Hermione cupped Andrew's mouth before he could repeat it. Harry slid the plate hard away from him and stomped angrily from the room.

"What did I do wrong?" Hermione asked Kate. "It started so well…"

"Just remember not to baby him," stated Kate. "I know it's difficult, especially since you are used to dealing with Andrew, but Harry is an adult. You don't have to praise his every accomplishment. Right now it confuses him and later he'll distrust any praise."

"How do I help him? How do I avoid…" she pointed at the mess the spilled food made.

"Maybe for the time being, cut it for him before you give it to him, but apologize, saying that you are accustomed to doing so for Andrew," she clarified. Kate cast a warming charm on her own food and went to look for Harry. She found him on the top floor staring at the steps leading to the attic. "Did you want to explore the attic today? That sounds really interesting…"

Harry shrugged. "I got lost…"

"You haven't eaten yet. Hermione is making you an omelet. Does that sound good?"

"Sure," he sighed. "Might as well eat…"

Kate led Harry back into the kitchen where Hermione was scooping the omelet back onto Harry's plate. "Thanks, Hermione," he stated. "You didn't have to cook for me…"

"It was no trouble at all," she said following Kate's cue. She cut the omelet into bite sized pieces. "Oh, I am sorry, Harry. I wasn't thinking and started cutting it for Andrew, but he's already eaten. Did you want me to make you another one?"

"No, this is fine," Harry replied. "I have a bit of trouble anyway. Thanks."

Harry ate while Andrew straddled his leg, as Harry gave him a ride up and down. The childish laughter filled the kitchen as the adults ate.

"Are we going to practice magic today," Harry asked Kate once they left the kitchen.

"No, today is Saturday. We've no lessons planned," she replied.

"I believe I'd like to visit my mum this afternoon," Hermione said. "Would it be alright if I left Andrew here with you and Kate, Harry?"

"Sure, we'll be fine," answered Kate. "Will you be gone long? I was hoping to get some shopping done later…I can do it another day, if you'd like."

"No, I think an hour or so should do it," Hermione replied. "Why don't I go now so you'll have more time?"


Hermione arrived at her mother's. Over tea and biscuits they discussed the changes in Hermione's life. "I don't know how to help him, Mum," she cried. "If I don't figure it out, I'll lose him again."

"Tell me what's happening, Hermione dear," her mother said smoothing her hair. "Maybe we can figure it out together…"

Hermione sobbed as she told her mother the latest of Harry's prognosis and symptoms, his reluctance to go to the hospital, and all of the things she was facing with him. "It's just so hard, Mum. I don't know if I'm strong enough. In a way, he's worse than Andrew. He just doesn't remember from one minute to the next. Sometimes he'll remember something from the past in his dreams, but in five minutes he has no idea what we were talking about. He gets lost in that house constantly. I am so grateful for Kate. I must have been mad to think I could have helped him on my own."

"Maybe a smaller house would be better…" offered Mrs. Granger. "I've been to that house, remember? Five floors are a bit much for anyone. Take a bit of his savings and get something less overwhelming…"

"I don't want to touch his money. He'll need it…"

"…To live on and that is exactly what you are helping him do…besides that house is depressing enough, even for people who aren't fraught with it. Find something cheery…"

Hermione's face lit up. "You are undoubtedly the best…" She hugged her mother before making preparations to leave.


When she arrived back at the house, she asked Harry to watch Andrew for her while she chatted with Kate. "My mum suggested we find a smaller house or maybe a flat in order to give Harry less to wander about in. What do you think of the idea?"

Kate grinned. "I think it is wonderful! And I have the perfect solution, I think." Hermione raised an eyebrow in anticipation. "My grandmother's house is just like you are describing. It's airy and cheerful. There's plenty of room…and since she passed, it's sat empty. I was planning to sell it. I just haven't had the time. What do you think?"

"I think we'll need to take a look at it…" Hermione grinned.

The two women went back into the playroom. They found Andrew riding again on Harry's back. Harry was rearing like a hippogriff as Andrew held on laughing. Andrew yawned as Harry let him down gently.

"I'll put the boy to bed while you two talk," offered Kate.

"What's up?" Harry asked almost harshly. "Not that I'll remember it anyway, but please go ahead…"

Hermione led him into his bedroom and closed the door. "I've got an idea," she began. "What do you think of living somewhere else…somewhere smaller?"

"Why?" asked Harry. Hermione couldn't tell if he were truly asking or if she should let him rest a bit before proceeding. The latter sounded like a better option so she led him to his bed. "Lets' just relax for a bit, and then we can talk…"

"Alright," he said as he crawled under the blankets. She joined him and wrapped her arms around his shoulders. He kissed her gently. "Do you miss him?"

"Miss who?"

"Your Harry," he said sadly. "I've tried to be him for you but I can't. I'm Trey. I'm afraid that Trey is all I'll ever be…"

"Don't be ridiculous," she chided tenderly. "You are one and the same, no matter what label you put on yourself."

"I don't want you to leave me…" he admitted.

"That won't happen," she responded pulling him closer.

She leaned her forehead against his. "We were thinking that a smaller house might be easier for you. Would that bother you?"

"No. I think this place has sentimental attachment for Harry, but it doesn't for me…"

"Would you want to sell it?" she asked.

"I don't think so," he answered. "Maybe one day I'll remember some things and regret not having it. I know we need the money, but…"

Hermione shushed him. "You've got plenty of money," she said. "You are quite wealthy, as a matter of fact…."

"I am?" he asked as he struggled to maintain his attentiveness.

"Yes, you are." She kissed him again. "We can talk about that later as well. Why don't you rest for a bit?"

"Stay with me?"

"Let me check on Andrew and I'll be right back."


When she returned Harry was already asleep. She noticed his journal on the desk and brought it with her to his bed. As if noticing she'd returned, he rolled onto his side and curled into her.

She marveled at the detail of his writing. Some pages were his same spiky scrawl, while others were more haphazardly written as if by a child. He'd arranged the pages into separate lists. One page read: 'Things I remember from childhood,' another said: 'Did this really happen?' She read the headings quickly before stopped and read carefully the page titled, 'Questions I shouldn't ask.'

  1. Who is Andrew's father and why is he not in his life?
  2. Why did I kill that man?
  3. Where are my parents?
  4. When am I going to be well enough to leave here to go out in public?
  5. Did Hermione really love Harry and can she love Trey?

Hermione made a mental note to answer his questions as soon as was practical. She banished the book back to the desk and pocketed her wand. She was heartened to know that he'd noticed Andrew's lack of paternal influence. She'd been sure it never crossed his mind. With resolve she snuggled into him and fell asleep as well.

She awoke to find she was lying on top of a still sleeping but obviously aroused Harry. She moved to get away, but found herself trapped by his arms. "Harry," she whispered. "You need to let me go…"

"This is nice, though," he mumbled.

"It's very nice," she answered, "but that doesn't make it right."

Harry's eyes flew open. "I-I'm s-s-sorry," he stammered, his face red. "I was dreaming and…I'm sorry." He released her at once.

"Don't be," she said softly. "It was very nice, but also dangerous. Maybe one day soon we can explore this, just not now, alright?" He nodded and pulled the pillow over his face. "I think," she said with a wink, "if you want to hide the evidence, you should move the pillow lower…"

He responded by throwing it at her. She giggled as she left the room.


Kate had returned and was starting dinner. Hermione thought she seemed upset. "Is everything alright?" she asked.

"You tell me…" Kate responded tersely.

"Have I done something?" Hermione tried again.

"We need to run tests, Hermione. I thought you understood that."

"I do understand that. What's the problem?"

"It is considered unethical to sleep with a man as mentally challenged as Harry is. In fact it's quite dangerous. I realize he's very attractive and I'm sure you treasure your little trip down memory lane, but sex right now can kill him!"

"I didn't have sex with him," Hermione snapped. "We both stayed fully clothed, I assure you."

"You are playing with fire and I don't want my patient to be the one getting burned…"

Hermione softened. "Kate, please listen to me. I've listened to everything you've said as well as done some research on my own. He seemed very vulnerable when we went into his room. I held him and comforted him. We fell asleep, that's all."

"So nothing happened?"

"No, nothing happened. I awoke in a compromising position, still fully clothed. I convinced him to let me go and told him that we can't until he's better. I'm telling you this because you need to know that my commitment to Harry is for a lifetime. I'm not some hormone-ridden teenager who cannot control herself. I know the risks and quite frankly, I'm a little insulted that you think so little of me."

Kate grinned widely. "Forgive me for doubting you…"

Hermione returned the smile. "Nothing to forgive…. It's nice to know that you care so much for him. We are on the same team, now let me tell you about his book…"

As they were talking, Harry entered and poured himself a cup of coffee. He scowled as he asked, "Do I normally drink this? It's horrible…"

Kate and Hermione suppressed a chuckle at his expression. Hermione said, "No, you hate it. Your tea is in the yellow teapot…"

"I should put a note on this then so I don't have to taste it…" He shuddered.

Kate and Hermione shared a look. "That's a brilliant idea," said Kate.

Hermione took over, "We can label things to remind you where to go…"

"And what things are…" added Kate with excitement.


"So you won't get lost or distracted!" Hermione finished. "Just think of it, Harry. If you want something to drink, just look for the note to find your favorite."

"Or if you need to use the loo, it'll say that on the door…"

"That could work…" Harry responded noncommittally.

Kate jumped up and grabbed her wand. "Let's get started!" Hermione followed her out of the room.

"We'll still need a smaller house, but this should help in the meantime…" said Hermione.

"I can show you the house tomorrow. Should we take the Knight bus?"

Hermione scowled. "No, it'll take longer, but I'll borrow Mum's car. I want to avoid subjecting Harry to the chaos as long as possible. Did you see the Prophet this morning?"

"Yes, I did. It's as if the wolves have scented their prey. Who is taking care of the fan mail he's been getting?"

"That would be Ron and Luna. Harry's post is being directed to Ron's flat and they share the task of opening it and responding."

Harry entered the drawing room and stammered, "Er…I…er…"

"Need some help, love?" Hermione asked. However Andrew made his presence known and Kate was left to assist Harry.

"What happened?" she asked.

"I was hungry…" Harry stated as if that explained everything.

Kate walked into the kitchen expecting to find a major disaster. Instead she found it in the same lived-in state in which it was left. "Was there a problem?"

"I wanted something and…it's hard and crunchy…salty…"

"You wanted some crisps?" Kate asked.

"Crisps?" echoed Harry. Kate got the crisps from the cupboard and handed them to him. "Yeah…thanks."

Kate smiled. Harry followed her out, loudly crunching. Hermione looked at them questioning. "Any trouble?"

"No," answered Kate. "He just couldn't find what he was looking for…"

Andrew came over to share the crisps with Harry. He scuttled up into his lap and the two immediately began a contest to see who could crunch their crisps louder. Hermione asked Kate, "Why do you respond, 'Because I said so,' to him when he asks why?"

Kate chuckled. "It's his defensive mechanism. He loses the conversation and asks, 'Why?' to put the ball back in your court. Explaining further only confuses him more, so I use the old parental standby. It doesn't matter what you answer; you could say anything at all. It would make no difference. He's finished anyway…"

"How do you know he's not really asking?"

"Look in his eyes," Kate responded. "They'll have a far away look if he's distracted. He'll be looking right at you, if he's not."

"I'll have to keep that in mind…."


After Andrew's bedtime came the discussion Hermione dreaded. "Harry," she began. "I'd like to talk to you about something…" Harry looked at her intently. "Kate and I think a smaller house would be a bit easier for you. Her grandmother's house is vacant and from what she says, would fit the bill. We want to take you to look at it, but we don't want to cause you unnecessary stress."

"What's stressful about looking at a house?" he asked.

"Well, the Daily Prophet, our newspaper, has gotten wind that you are back. They have been relentless in trying to find you…"

"Why?" Harry asked.

Hermione looked deep in his eyes before answering. "Remember I told you that you are famous in our world? This is a part of that. The Ministry wants you for publicity and the public wants to see you. If this house weren't Unplottable, you'd have been found already…"

"…so can't Remus make a new house Unplottable?"

"I can certainly ask him, if you'd like. What I need to know is: are you okay with changing houses?"

Harry chuckled. "Do you really think it matters? I can't usually remember where I am from room to room, much less house to house…"

Hermione smiled at him warmly. "Will you be alright going to look at it in the morning?"

"I don't see a problem…"

Hermione took a deep breath before continuing, "Can we stop by St. Mungo's afterward and let the Healers see if they can do anything to help you?"

"So that's what this house thing is about…a ruse," he snarled. "No thanks, I'm not going back there."

"If it were a trick, I wouldn't have talked to you about it…." She leaned over and kissed him soundly. "I'll use any means I have to in order to help you."

Harry snorted. "I know I don't remember stuff sometimes, but I'm fine, really I am."

Hermione decided that the only way to get his agreement was to play dirty. She climbed into his lap. "This afternoon you made it clear that the idea of the two of us engaging in a physical relationship appealed to you as much as it appealed to me. What I'm asking you to do is to find out once and for all from the Healers if that is possible. I'll go with you and stay by your side…." She quickly finished seeing that his was reaching the end of his concentration. "Please do this for me, Trey….I don't want to trick you into going, but I swear to you, I will if it is necessary…" She had used his former name on purpose, making it plain that it was him she wanted, whether or not he remembered being Harry Potter.

He kissed her again before agreeing. "Don't let them tie me up, please?" His voice sounded small and scared. She nodded her agreement before resuming the kiss. She only hoped he remembered approving the hospital visit. She ran her tongue across his lips to beg entry. He complied readily.

As his hands slid down her back, her guard raised. She nonchalantly moved his hands to a better location. His right hand slid to her stomach and began inching up her torso. "Harry, no," she said firmly against his lips. She slapped at his roaming hands. It felt almost as if she were wrestling an octopus. "Harry, stop it," she told him more sternly.

"Why do we have to stop?" he demanded flopping back against the couch cushions. "Tell me that…please."

"We have to stop because it could be dangerous for you. You aren't feeling well enough…"

Harry grinned at her. "I'm feeling pretty good about now…"

Hermione laughed. "Alright, Mr. I-Can-Handle-Anything, what did we have for dinner? No? How about, what was your best subject in school? Still nothing? What was your mother's name?"

"You don't play fair…" he grumbled. "I just…"

"You just want to make love and I want that, too. We just have to wait until the Healers say that it won't hurt you…"

"I hate Healers…" he scowled.

"I know you do, love. We can continue this if you promise to behave…"

"Why?" he asked losing attention.

"Because I said so…"