A/N: thanks to Grylonfilm who noticed I put Devon as a first year in chapter 10, instead of using Derek's name. I would pull it down, but that means pulling down 11 too, so I will try to remember to do it after everyone has had a chance to read the latest chapters.
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Let's Talk
Marissa stumbled out of the fireplace at her parent's home and immediately heard her father playing the piano, which meant her mother was still at work.
Dusting herself off, she took a deep breath and walked towards the notes of "Fur Elise" as they flowed through the marble hall. Marissa pushed open the door to the library, a little too hard so it slammed back and hit the stopper. Her father turned around on the stool and seemed genuinely surprised to see her.
"Marissa," he said in a slow voice, "Everything alright?"
"No, dad it's not," she said in a tight voice, her hand gripping the gold doorknob as she forced herself to look right at him. Confronting her father was not something she did often; but right now her need to know was overwhelming her.
"What in the…world…was that scene today? Where do you think you get off acting like such a teenager?"
Draco turned so he was facing her fully and raised an eyebrow, his hands now on his knees. Straightening up he stared right at her.
"Where do you think you get off talking to your father like that?" he retorted evenly.
"You certainly didn't act like my father up on that platform. You and Harry were acting like kids Derek's age! Insults back and forth…what the hell happened between you two for all that to happen?"
"First, I don't want to hear another swear word come out of your mouth and second-," he began standing up now and Marissa could see he was getting angry. Marissa interrupted him, something she never would have dreamed of doing…yesterday!
"Second, I have every right to question you! I went there to see if that club is something I'd like to do, then ten minutes into it Brian and I witness our parents acting like complete gits up there!" Marissa was now almost shouting and never heard her mother apparate into the house.
"Don't yell-," Draco started taking a step towards her, his voice low with anger.
The tension vibrated in the air between them; almost identical personalities clashing like the duel that took place hours before.
"I have every right to yell, dad!" Marissa fumed, eyes flashing and her hands clenched at her sides. "Those spells that you and Harry did? Some of them I have NEVER seen before, nor heard before. You both could have killed each other…didn't you see me there? Don't you realize what you did was totally wrong…not to mention immature!" Marissa practically yelled the last word but managed to keep her eyes locked with his and before she knew it they were facing off a few feet apart, neither aware of Ginny walking down the hall.
"Neither one of us had any intention of killing the other," Draco said in a forcefully controlled voice. "We dueled…that's what we were there to show you, what it's like. P-Harry wanted to show you the darker side of it, so we did…."
"Don't go blaming this on Harry! You're just as much at fault as he is for continuing after he hung you upside down. You could have called it quits, been on your way and I wouldn't be here all pissed off at you!" Marissa pumped her hands in the air with the last few words then crossed her arms seeing her father take a deep breath then release it, trying to keep his temper under control.
"We're adults, as were many of the students there, Marissa. If they didn't want to see a duel-," he began his voice a little louder than before.
"Duel? I would call that trying to exact revenge on each other and also something you'd call "one-up-man-ship"! You were supposed to be setting an example for US, not getting lost in your own little world of jealousy!" Marissa shouted at him, anger coursing through her. She could not remember ever being this angry at anyone in her life, and she wondered why she was so upset but yet he was still remaining pretty calm. A thought that made her feel even angrier.
Draco opened his mouth but all Marissa heard was her mother's sharp voice.
"Would someone tell me what is going on here?" Ginny demanded walking in and standing next to Marissa in the doorway.
"I think dad would LOVE to!" Marissa said through clenched teeth, then whirled around and ran up to her room, giving into a moment of the teenage anger. Slamming her door, she realized she should make the most of this time and pack some of her spring clothes.
Finding a bag, she shoved some shorts and t-shirts into it-cramming each one in, one after another as she mumbled to herself about parents and responsibilities. She wasn't sure how much time ticked by until she heard her mother's footsteps at her door, then a light knock.
"What," Marissa said flatly, shoving in some sandals on top of her clothes.
"Let's talk, Marissa."
The door opened, but Marissa didn't turn around. She zipped up the bag with such force she pinched her finger in
between the teeth of the zipper. Shoving the side of her finger into her mouth she let a moment of silence pass before
she answered her mother's request.
"I'm not talking to dad right now." Marissa turned around and tossed her bag onto her floor near the door. "He totally embarrassed me and himself, even if he doesn't know it!"
"Sit," Ginny ordered pointing at her bed and with a dramatic sigh, Marissa perched herself on the edge of her bed while her mother sat in the chair next to it.
"He told me what happened, the duel with Harry today. I'm sure being who they are, it got a bit out of control," Ginny began softly.
""Who they are"? They're teachers; they aren't supposed to get out of control!"
"Everyone has their breaking point, Marissa. Look at you; how mad you are. You have always had this vision of your father being perfect. Whether you realize it or not, you place him up on a pedestal and think about all the great things he and his mother have done; how he has supported this family and taught you to honor us, this family--."
"I don't put him up on a pedestal. I know no one is perfect!" Marissa snapped, that comment just registering in her head.
Ginny shook her head, amazed that Marissa could be so smart, yet so naïve about certain parts of life.
"Name something that you can think of that your father has done wrong or has admitted was wrong?"
Marissa thought and couldn't come up with anything. Although, she knew SOMETHING had to be there.
"He hardly ever admits he's wrong, which is what he was doing downstairs after you ran off. He KNOWS he and Harry got a bit out of control. They did in second year when they dueled for DADA too. He isn't perfect. His upbringing wasn't perfect and you put your father into a situation like that, a duel that he hasn't done since before you were born and he is likely to get a bit consumed by the emotions stemming from that."
"What do you mean his upbringing wasn't perfect? No one's is. I know his father hated everyone who wasn't a pure blood, he's told me that." Marissa squirmed on her bed, wanting to get up and pace but afraid to ruin her mother's calm demeanor, which she knew wasn't easy for her mum to do at the moment.
"Dueling and capturing death eaters is something you need lots of anger, and lots of talent to do. But having your father duel with you and pushing you beyond what you can do at the age of eight or even eleven can make you very angry."
"His father made him duel at age of eight?" Marissa asked her movements freezing for the moment and her anger forgotten for the time being.
"That and many other things that really don't concern you…right now," Ginny added quickly seeing her daughter's blue eyes narrow. "And the thing with Harry. They have always had a kind of rift between them, mostly brought on by your grandfather again. When Harry declined being a friend to a Malfoy and wasn't chosen for Slytherin your grandfather took that personally which, by default, meant your father had to also."
"Why could dad hate Harry? He's a nice guy. He's famous and talented," her daughter reasoned and looked up as Ginny placed a hand on Marissa's knee.
"They shouldn't have dueled like that. He knows that, but he doesn't want to admit it. He hates to admit when he's wrong…it was very hard for him to even tell me the story of his childhood and his father when we were still in school. As for Harry…there has always been a rivalry there and as you know once established, a rivalry is very hard to get rid of. You father wanted to follow Voldemort because his father did and Harry's destiny was to stop anyone from doing that, so right there your father resented him…that is until your grandfather died. When that happened, and when Voldemort was finally killed, I think he realized that it's much easier to be nice than to be mean. Try keeping all that bottled up inside you for fifteen years and when presented with the one person you could probably beat in a duel, that one person that you didn't like years before, you are bound to become a bit…unraveled."
Ginny watched Marissa's face for any sign of acknowledgement for what she had just explained. But, like her father
she kept it impassive, but the slight shifting on the bed and the way her foot tapped out an invisible beat clued Ginny
in that Marissa comprehended everything her mother had said.
"It still doesn't make it right. You have to understand, mum, that none of my friends have seen any of that dark magic or have seen any duels that intense. We're lucky that we don't have a Voldemort in our generation but what they did scared some of us and also put a lot of people in awe of them. I saw in his eyes, he enjoyed it!" Marissa said vehemently. "Harry was even having fun until a spell hit him and knocked him off the platform and he finally saw Brian. That's what stopped them…the faces of their children and realizing that maybe they went a bit to far."
"I think Marissa, that you have just learned a hard lesson. That parent's aren't perfect! Malfoy's were brought up to think they were perfect, and I think your dad knows he isn't but still wants to believe he is in the eyes of his children. So, he would rather fight you and try to convince you that HE was justified in his actions than admit what he did was wrong.
To me, downstairs he admitted in a way I understand that he was wrong in what he did. But, when it comes to his children, it's very hard for him to admit he has faults. No one is perfect, Marissa. Not Harry, not Hermione, not us, not even McGonagall or Dumbledore. Everyone has a weakness and your father's happens to be his own past. When he is confronted with something that reminds him of his life before his father died, he would rather not admit he isn't sure how to handle it and try to deal with it on his own, than ask for help."
Marissa looked down at her floor, not wanting to admit that her mother was right that she had just found out her father wasn't perfect. She couldn't help but smiling to herself with that thought, there she was not being able to admit something to herself, just like her father.
"I don't expect you to understand right away, you're only fifteen and you are so much like your father that your stubbornness might stop you from ever really understanding certain things."
"No, I understand. If he had just said "it got out of hand" or "it never should have happened," or…or "I'm sorry I scared you…," Marissa's voice caught as she realized that was one of the main reasons behind her anger. Sensing her daughter's sudden shift in emotions, Ginny leaned over and hugged Marissa feeling the tense muscles slowly relax in her embrace.
"He should have said…all of those…and I'm sorry he did scare you. His…assertiveness is scary.
Sometimes it used to scare me too. Your father is a very complicated individual. I think maybe if you sit down and talk
with him and let him know it scared you, which is something he would never want to do to any of his children, then you
can come to terms with everything."
Marissa nodded, holding her mother tightly as she tried to make sense of her new, shaken up little world.
"Is Brian talking to his dad?"
"He should be; how'd you know?"
"Well, I figured he would be. He hasn't seen his father like that either, so it's only natural." Ginny pulled back and bit and tenderly tucked a piece of hair behind Marissa's ear. "Can I send your father up to talk to you?"
Marissa nodded, feeling slightly uneasy about having a heart to heart with him.
"What am I going to say to him? I'm still angry," Marissa tucked her hair behind her other ear and looked at her mother.
"I think both of you should apologize. You for yelling and him for acting like he did. You two are too close to let something like this bother you for any length of time, okay?"
"Yeah, I guess." Marissa took a deep breath and let it out, feeling her mother's cool lips kiss her forehead before she went downstairs. Stretching out on her bed she stared at her ceiling, reliving the duel in her head. She could barely hear her parents voices downstairs and she let her mind wander to the platform. She had to admit they were both very talented and the wordless spells were amazing. That was something they taught in sixth year so she hadn't even attempted much more than an "Accio" wordless spell.
She felt her father's presence at her door before he attempted to speak. She sat up and slowly raised her eyes to his. He stood there looking less like her father than she had ever seen. A bit embarrassed, a bit upset, emotions she hadn't seen in a longtime. Marissa gave a small nod then moved over a bit in silent communication for him to enter and sit with her on the bed. Walking over he slowly sank down next to her his hands clasped together and tucked between his knees, just like hers were and it occurred to her how much they were alike, right down to body language.
Marissa took a deep breath and slowly let it out before she spoke.
"I'm sorry I yelled…and swore at you," she said so quietly that she wasn't even sure he heard.
"Being the parent, I should've apologized first," he answered and Marissa shrugged a shoulder in response.
"There's a lot of history between Harry and I and it all came rearing back up today…and we shouldn't have let it. It got way out of hand and it never should have. I can't speak for him, but I should've never let it get as far as it did."
Marissa felt him shift and feeling the nervous need to pace she stood up and walked over to her dresser then turned to look at him.
"No, you shouldn't have," she looked at him briefly then down at her hands which were fiddling with the last button on her blouse, then she dropped them to her sides. "I've never had a reason to see any intense dueling like that; I had no idea what you had to do to capture death eaters or what Harry had to do to defeat Voldemort and I guess I got a sense of that today…," she let her voice trail off while still staring at the floor. She heard him get up and walk towards her.
"Nor should you need to know, not now, not as a fourth year." He stopped a few feet away from her and she mustered up the courage to look up at him. What she saw surprised her. He looked sad and also a bit angry, but she could feel it wasn't meant towards her. She managed a small smile and was relieved to see him return it.
"I should've just let it pass; one day I'll need to see those spells so at least now I can say I have." Marissa tried to make the situation a bit more positive.
"No, you called me on it and sometimes I need more than your mother to keep me in line…also, I'm sure it scared you and many other students as well," he said, shoving his hands into his pockets.
"Yeah…you did," Marissa admitted clearing her throat. "But what scared me more were the looks on yours and Harry's faces. Like you had fun trying to scare each other," Marissa admitted. There was a moment of uncomfortable silence as the emotions swirled around them. She heard him take a quick breath and knew he was going to speak.
"I'm sorry, Marissa," he said softly. Her head snapped up and she blinked at him.
"Me too dad," she said swallowing the tears that threatened to spill. She was sorry for his past which she knew must have been worse than her mother led her to believe and for all the anger he felt but couldn't get past. She saw him shift his weight and suddenly she launched herself at him, feeling his arms wrap around her in a tight embrace.
"I'm so very sorry I scared you. I'd never do that intentionally," he whispered against her hair, noticing that she still used the same soap they used on her when she was little. Though, now instead of being carried around in his arms, the top of her head hit him under the chin. She nodded her head and he could feel her shaking as she tried to control her emotions. Closing his eyes he rubbed her back trying to remember when she had gone from being three and riding on his shoulders to being a young adult trying to figure out the world.
"All the childhood crap that went on between Harry and I shouldn't affect you…and I'm sorry that it did." He felt her squeeze him in response and he savored the moment of just holding and hugging his eldest daughter.
"It's okay…I understand a bit better now," she relented and he made a neutral noise that reverberated in her ear. Marissa realized that he had apologized more than once got the distinct impression he was truly sorry. Marissa felt a pang of emotion enter her heart and only held onto it for a second, feeling the need to suddenly voice what she was feeling.
"I love you, dad," she said quietly, feeling him hug her even tighter.
"I love you too," he whispered, his voice full of emotion and they stood there for another minute before she felt him shift and grab her around the waist.
"What're you doing?" Marissa shrieked grabbing his shoulders as he lifted her up.
"Something I haven't done since you were ten," he answered and he spun around, dropping her unceremoniously onto her bed. She collapsed into a fit of laughter, glad that they had moved past this speed bump. And she wondered, as she grabbed her bag of spring clothes and followed her father down the stairs, how Brian was doing with his father.
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Brian flooed in to their dining room fireplace making a loud racket as he did so, knocking over the ash can, and saw his father look around the corner from the kitchen.
"Brian!" Harry threw the towel down on the counter and walked over, knowing why he was there.
"You need to tell me why you did what you did up there today," Brian said in a low voice. Harry's insides flinched at the tone Brian used; it was Hermione's tone when she wasn't happy and it wasn't easy to move past.
"I guess I got a bit too involved. It went way beyond what it should've," Harry started, holding onto the dining room chair as if leaning into it for support.
"Just a bit, don't you think?" Brian said wryly. "You two acted like a bunch of third years up there!" Brian fumed, his anger seeping into his words.
"We have a difference in opinion on dueling, Brian…," Harry started and Brian held up his hand and closed his eyes for a moment. Gathering his emotions he let his hand fall to the chair and adopted a similar stance to his father.
"That's obvious!" Brian opened his eyes and looked right into his father's eyes. "But to demonstrate is one thing; to try and hurt the other person in front of a bunch of your students…what were you thinking?"
"Apparently, nothing," Harry said dryly, then turned serious. "Look, I haven't dueled since…Voldemort actually and I was almost seventeen when I did that, so that is what I drew my experience on."
"Couldn't you have toned it down? I mean the insults you were trading with Professor Malfoy and the spells you did to each other most of us probably haven't seen in our lives. Plus, you two totally embarrassed Marissa and me acting like that!" Brian's grip on the back of the dining room chair was turning his knuckles white as he faced off against his father.
"I'm sorry Brian, I really am. But for some reason, being up there brought back all those old memories of being pushed around by Draco; of him and I constantly butting heads about everything! Plus, with everything I have been through my instinct tends to skew towards surviving, rather than the art of it."
"Surviving?" Brian asked confused. He knew about surviving to fight Voldemort, but from the way his father worded it, it sounded like something more.
"Yes, "surviving"," Harry repeated. "There's been many times in my life, not just my sixth year that I had to fight with everything I had. You know about Voldemort…but leading up to it, I had to fight to survive from day one. I'm not going to go easy on someone in a duel, it's not who I am. I should've stopped it before it got out of hand, before we started falling into the audience…," Harry's green eyes clashed with his son's brown and they stared at each other a minute.
"You were hit with the AK spell at like eighteen months, but that wasn't your fault; you couldn't have stopped that," Brian backtracked, trying to figure out what else he had to fight to survive through.
"That's true. But I had to survive at the Dursley's. Oh, I know Petunia actually talks to us from time to time and Dudley might even give me the time of day, but there was a time when they didn't do squat for me," Harry's voice deepened with resentment and Brian watched his father's demeanor change. He had never really asked about the Dursley's and he only knew that they took him in and weren't the nicest of people.
"But what does your Aunt Petunia have to do with surviving and what does that have to do with what you did in the duel?" Brian ran his hands over his face, trying to understand.
"Sit, Brian." Came a voice from behind him. Spinning around, Brian saw his mother standing in the doorway with a basket of laundry floating in front of her. She had been walking by and had overheard the last few sentences of conversation. His mother placed the basket of laundry down in the hall while Brian pulled out the dining room chair. Hermione placed a hand on her son's back, gently guiding him into the cushioned seat. He saw his father look at Hermione and in just that one glance many words were exchanged and suddenly, Brian felt nervous…like they were going to reveal some big secret.
"Did dad tell you what he and Professor Malfoy did today?" Brian asked his voice still tinged with anger, his fingers drumming on the mahogany tabletop.
Hermione nodded and took the seat between them, folding her hands on the table. She glanced at Harry who nodded and sat down next to her, their hands clasping in the middle.
And so Harry began telling his son about his childhood; about being locked in a cupboard until the age of eleven, how he didn't know he was a wizard until Hagrid came. Hermione helped fill Brian in on the events that happened during all the years leading up to Voldemort and how his aunt and uncle were being forced to take care of him. How they were forced to provide him a normal room, among other necessities, by Dumbledore. But, even as Dumbledore was enforcing it Harry was still fighting to get what he thought he deserved; just a roof over his head, the best education that could prepare him for whatever his future may hold. Hermione repeated word for word what the prophecy said and Brian's eyes had widened at this point feeling almost sick to his stomach. Together, his mother and father brought to life Harry's past and even included Draco in there and the "exchanges" they had numerous times throughout the years.
"If you get right down to it, Brian," Hermione reached out and took his hand, squeezing it, creating a human chain, "Your father and Draco are almost similar in the way they feel. They feel robbed of a happy childhood, both were made into something they weren't planning to be and both had to turn that around…and it took a lot of hard work and a lot of fighting both mentally and physically to get to where they are today. They still don't agree on most things except for yours and Marissa's and all their other children's happiness."
"So," Harry continued quietly, "I just went into the mode I knew best when I got up there. Draco knows how to push my buttons and I let him. I didn't mean to scare you, or Marissa or anyone else there."
"Why didn't you tell me this earlier? So I wouldn't come in here and start acting like a complete git?"
"Because I was hoping you never would have to know!" Harry said vehemently. Hermione let go of her husbands hand which reached up and removed his glasses so he could rub the bridge of his nose. A heartfelt sigh escaped as he placed his glasses back on his face. "There aren't too many people who do know everything that went on before my first year and during the summers I was at the Dursleys. I didn't want you to feel sorry for me and I didn't want to expose you to that kind of uncaring."
"Yeah, well…you exposed me to a lot more this afternoon that's for sure," Brian mumbled, looking at the pattern the grain in the wood made across the table.
Harry nodded, not sure what to say and glanced at Hermione for help. Hermione sighed, patted Harry's hand and stood up making her way to her basket of laundry.
"I think you two need to figure out some things. I'm going to finish this laundry. Brian, before you go come give me a hug goodbye." Hermione squeezed Brian's shoulder and walked out as Brian nodded at her.
"And, you probably know this, but don't share this with your sisters yet, please?" Brian nodded again to his mum and she disappeared up the stairs.
Both Potter's stared at the table in front of them.
"Is there anything else I should know?" Brian asked in a low voice, totally unsure to what he was feeling know.
"I have no idea. There isn't much else to what we already said."
More silence.
"How's Marissa?" Harry asked and he saw Brian glance up at him, a guarded look on his face.
"Angry. Talking to her dad right now."
"Did we scare you all that badly?" Harry asked.
Brian shrugged. "She was more scared about how her father acted than you. I just never knew how powerful either one of you were until I saw you up there. I mean I knew…but…it's different seeing it…," Brian finished.
"You are probably more powerful than I am, Brian, and you just don't realize it yet."
"What?" Brian stared at him, thinking maybe that last fall his dad took knocked him for a loop.
"Your mother was called the brightest witch of her age and you know all the nicknames I was given. Combine that and you get you and your sisters. During the next two years at Hogwarts you will learn so much about yourself and what you can and can't do…it'll amaze you. And, look at Marissa." Harry leaned forward, seeing he caught Brian's interest.
"Her mother could do a hex quicker than anyone, she was very smart in Potions and you combine that with Draco Malfoy and what you saw up there PLUS the Slytherin and you get one very smart, very powerful witch. Look at her and the Hogwarts house she and her brothers are in. They are a very smart, very learned group of kids. Except, none of you know this yet because you haven't been put to any tests."
Brian nodded a bit overwhelmed with everything then dropped his face into his hands, trying to put words to the thoughts bouncing around in his head.
"I guess I understand a bit better, though please try not to act like someone I don't know in the future. It was pretty freaky seeing you up there, especially speaking Parseltongue," Brian gave a shudder and pulled his hands away from his face.
"I'll try. I'm not usually faced with those situations at Hogwarts anymore so…I haven't had to call upon any of that old knowledge in a long time."
Harry stood up and Brian did the same, figuring it was time for him to leave.
"You have every right to be angry," Harry granted his son, acknowledging the reason he came to the house.
"I'm not so much anymore, now that I know a bit about why. Even though I don't understand it all," Brian gave a small smile. "I'm angrier at the Dursleys than you."
Harry gave a small laugh nodding at Brian then walked around the corner of the table and stood in front of his son.
"My past made me who I am today. I would change parts of it if I could, but I would never change whom I met at Hogwarts or any of those experiences because they really taught me what was important. I didn't realize it at the time, but I do now. I wouldn't have your mother if Ron and I didn't fight that stupid troll…."
"I get it," Brian said, not really wanting to hear anymore. His father could get a bit sappy about his Hogwarts romance with his mum and at the moment, Brian didn't really feel like listening to those thoughts. "I should probably go say goodbye to mum and get back to school."
"Again, I'm sorry. I originally just came by the club to see if you were there."
Brian nodded then moved like he was going to leave, but something stopped him. He looked up at his father, only a few inches taller than him and saw that there was tiredness in his eyes, a sight he had never seen before.
"See ya, dad," Brian said and in a rare moment of affection he hugged his dad for a moment and was surprised to feel how strongly his dad returned it.
`He probably takes whatever he can get,' Brian thought to himself, knowing that his father wasn't shown love at all until he found his friends in school.
"Have a good night, or try to, son…and I'll talk to Marissa tomorrow." Brian backed up and let his hands drop to his side, then turned to leave.
"She'll be fine. I don't think you need to." Brian paused in the doorway to the hall.
"Maybe you should then," Harry said and Brian looked back at him questioningly.
"I don't want any rivalry her father and I had come between…the friendship you two have," Harry said quickly, not quite sure what those two had.
"Oh, right. Yeah…I said I'd meet up with her sometime," Brian said and he gave his father a wave as he walked towards the stairs to bid his mother farewell.
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