Forget About the Past…
Over New Year's the Malfoy's went to their vacation house in Spain, enjoying time away from school, London and managing not to make each other too mad during the week they were there. Jillian and Cassandra joined them for a few days and Marissa was happy to have some other females there to talk and laugh with.
Marissa and Devon didn't get any further stories or information out of their father about Hogwarts. Erin had mentioned Amy's name a few times, after Marissa asked her how her classes were going. Apparently, they liked to pair themselves together in their classes and Erin rambled on about the magazines they talked about, books, the teachers…all the while Marissa could see her father casting glances at her mother who would just shrug and continue what she was doing.
But, the night they arrived back home, three days before the Hogwarts Express was slated to leave it was Ginny that was at the forefront of Marissa's thoughts. She, Derek and Dixon had just finished going through some old photo of Ginny and her brothers as they were trying to organize a bunch of photographs their grandmother had given them. Grandma Weasley had asked if they would help her put them into albums so they were more accessible.
It was late when Marissa went to bed and as she closed her eyes and drifted off to sleep, listening to her father's low voice talking to her mother it was a younger Ginny Weasley that Marissa started dreaming about.
It was almost like the pensieve that Brian had described. She was walking along the side of Ginny, not talking but watching her mother talk to a tall good looking boy who was in Ravenclaw. They separated and for a moment her mother was alone, getting ready to take the familiar path from the dungeon stairs to the Gryffindor stairs when a large Slytherin appeared around the corner and her mother stopped him, smelling firewhiskey on this underage student.
Marissa felt like she was right there and couldn't do anything. Before her mother could react, this boy had Ginny up against the wall, fighting to control her and Marissa struggled to make out the words…her heart was racing as she looked around for someone…anyone to help her mother.
She heard her mother yell:
"GET OFF ME…NOW!" as loud as she could and Marissa witnessed this guy press his mouth to Ginny's and saw one hand working its way under her shirt. Marissa could feel how scared Ginny was; she knew her mind was screaming, that her body was fighting along with her mind, moving and trying to writhe away from him.
`Not here, please not here,' Ginny was screaming in her head, feeling sick to her stomach just like Marissa was. She saw his hands, in places they weren't supposed to be and the next thing she knew the boy was thrown backwards and her mother fell in a heap, Draco crouching next to her talking to her. Marissa swung around and saw the Ravenclaw haul the boy up by the neck of his robes and drag him up the stairs.
Spinning back around she saw her father, a younger version, in his teaching robes, helping Ginny up….
Marissa yelled and sat straight up in bed jumping as her door slammed open and her father came in, with Ginny on his heals. Both were dressed for bed and she had obviously woken them up.
"What's wrong?" her father demanded and Marissa realized she had tears streaming down her face and her hands were covering her mouth. Shaking her head she collapsed into her father's arms as he sat on the bed.
Draco held her and looked at Ginny whose eyes were wide, trying to figure out what nightmare Marissa just had at one in
the morning.
"Marissa, what is it?" Ginny knelt down and put a hand on her daughter's back, slightly disconcerted to see her crying into Draco's shoulder. She couldn't remember the last time she had seen Marissa in his arms…probably the year before she left for Hogwarts when she got a new broom to play Quidditch on and had launched herself in pure joy at Draco.
"What happened, mum?" Marissa said in a strangled voice and turned her tear streaked face towards her mother her head still on Draco's chest. "What happened to you at school?"
"What?" Ginny pulled herself up slowly and sat next to Draco so she could see Marissa's face. "At school?"
"Hogwarts…you were doing a round with a Ravenclaw boy and some guy attacked you!" Marissa sounded angry and then pushed herself away from her father, wiping at the tears that were still on her face.
"Marissa…how…you dreamt that?" Ginny asked softly and met Draco's eyes. Marissa nodded as she tucked her hair behind her ears and tried to take some deep breaths to calm herself.
"Why would someone do that?"
Draco turned to Marissa and placed a hand on her knee which was covered by her blue comforter.
"He did it because he was drunk and thought he could. How much did you dream or see?" he asked feeling Ginny's hand rest on his shoulder. He reached up and took it, squeezing her fingers.
"I saw that Ravenclaw guy leave, then that other guy came and…did…inappropriate…stuff…then you were there next to her and that Ravenclaw was dragging him up the stairs. Why? Why would I dream something that happened to mum?"
(Marissa had already made up her mind it was real…even if her parents had tried to play it off as a bad dream, she knew
it had happened. She wasn't sure how she knew, how it was real, but it wasn't a dream.)
"I don't know…I wish you hadn't. I recovered and am fine, Marissa. Truly," Ginny said hugging her daughter and feeling her long arms come around her and hug her back.
"What happened to him?" she said her voice muffled in her mother's shoulder.
"He was expelled, sent to Azkaban for a few months and moved to Australia where he had a cousin or something. Last I heard he was still there," Draco explained.
"Why would I dream about something I had no idea happened…and then have it be real? What does that mean?" Marissa sat up, shrugging off Ginny's embrace.
Ginny and Draco shook their heads at the same time and were quiet for a minute.
"You know," Draco said quietly and shifted his weight on the bed, causing Marissa to look up at him in the dim light. "When your mother was younger, before she was even pregnant with you she used to dream about you. She saw you as a toddler, walking into our bedroom at the flat and one time running into the living room after a bad dream or something."
"Yea, she told me that once, but this was about the past. Why would I dream about a past that isn't even mine?" Marissa looked at the back of her hands then up at her mother, meeting her hazel eyes as a horrid thought came to her.
"This doesn't meant that I-," she began and Draco clamped a hand down on hers and she felt the strength of his grip as he clasped her hand.
"No," he said sharply. "Don't even say it. Your mother was in the wrong place at the wrong time and it should never have happened. It wasn't her fault and just because you dreamt about it doesn't mean it'll happen to you."
Marissa looked at him trying to feel reassured but it wasn't working very well.
"Besides, it was eleven at night, an hour after curfew on a weekend night…you wouldn't be out that late and this kind of thing rarely happens…nothing will hurt you Marissa. We promise…it's never happened since," Ginny laid her hand over Draco's and they sat there for a moment until Marissa scooted towards the back of her bed, causing her parents to stand up. She curled herself up in a ball and they both knew that Marissa wasn't entirely convinced or reassured.
"Do you want one of us to stay with you?" Ginny nodded towards then empty half of the double bed and before she could answer they looked at the door where a soft knock brought them out of their discussion.
Devon was standing there, blond hair mussed up from sleep, his hands now shoved deep inside his pajama pant
pockets.
"What's going on?" he asked sleepily, but his hazel eyes were alert and taking in the scene before him.
Before his parents could say anything, Marissa jumped right into the story and by the time she was done he was sitting on her bed, on the other side of her staring at his parents and shaking his head.
"I can see why you never told us, but strange to find out THIS way," he said stretching out his long legs.
"There aren't any other incidents you aren't telling us that she will dream about later are there?" Devon asked nonchalantly but Draco picked up on the protective tone in his son's voice and saw already that his 13 year old (almost 14) son was beginning to mature into a responsible adult.
"I was sick once…bad fever," Ginny let a small smile come to her face remembering how Draco stayed with her that night until the fever broke. "Had awful dreams and also thought I was dating Harry, though I knew it wasn't right, but that's what my hallucinations were telling me."
Draco snorted. "There was also the one where you thought it was I who defeated the Dark Lord, so you really were not well."
Ginny nudged him then turned her attention back to her now quiet and contemplative daughter.
"Do you want someone to stay until you fall asleep?"
Marissa gave a small shrug, not wanting to admit it would be nice to not be alone after that dream, but not wanting a parent in bed with her.
"Who? Me? Dad? Devon?" Ginny asked gently and before she even finished saying her son's name Marissa gave a small nod.
"Aww...come on...," Devon started but saw his father narrow his eyes at him.
"Fine," Devon grumbled and laid back on the pillows on top of the covers, not liking to snuggle under them
like his sister. "I'll stay until she falls asleep."
"You'll be here in the morning I bet," Ginny said knowing how quickly her children fell asleep.
That comment elicited a small smile from Marissa.
Devon rolled his eyes and felt his father's hand touch his leg in a silent gesture of thanks and after a kiss from Ginny and a smile from their father, brother and sister were left alone with the hall light shining in through the cracked door.
"No more bad dreams…memories…whatever ok?" Devon asked turning on his side, away from his sister.
"Yeah. I'll try," she whispered and let out a deep sigh.
He felt her move around until she was lying on her stomach and was drifting off when he heard her say something.
"Huhmmm?" he rolled over onto his stomach as well and stared at the back of her head.
"Thanks," she whispered and Devon knew how hard it was for her to say that. She hated admitting she needed anyone.
"Sure," was his response and within seconds both fell sound asleep.
-----
Marissa stirred, all warm and comfortable under her covers, briefly forgetting about the "dream" she has hours earlier. For a moment she wondered who was sleeping up against her and as she stretched and encountered another leg she heard Devon grumbling.
"Stop kicking."
Marissa's eyes popped open and she found herself curled up against the back of Devon who had somehow found his way under her covers.
"You're a bed hog."
"It's my bed," Marissa said and slid away from him and feeling the colder sheets hit her arms. She gasped quietly and pulled the covers tighter around herself and glanced at her clock. It was six in the morning, way to early to think about getting up.
"Yeah and if I wasn't so warm I would get up and move," Devon turned over and opened an eye to see her sticking out her tongue.
"That's very unladylike you know," he punched the pillow and yelped as she poked him in the ribs and soon they were wrestling trying to tickle the other until Devon managed to grab her in a bear hug and hold her arms against her stomach, pulling her back against him.
"Ok, ok," Marissa stifled a laugh, trying to free her arms. "You can let me go, you win."
"No way. I'll drift off to sleep and you'll attack me again…you never give up easily." His arms stayed securely around her and Marissa sighed.
"I promise not to do that. I can't move and I just want to go back to sleep," she said and felt him release his grip, but his hands stayed on her arms and for a moment she had a flash of that guys hands, pinning her mother's arms against the wall and she felt a shudder go through her body.
Devon must have felt it because he let out another sleepy "hmm?" and tightened his arms around her
protectively; she felt secure with her brother's body behind her and his arms around her stomach, holding hers.
"Nothing…just go back to sleep," Marissa was thankful he was there because for some reason she was really unnerved about what happened over fifteen years ago. Closing her eyes, she willed herself to relax and fall asleep…and it helped to hear her brother's even breathing behind her letting her know she wasn't alone.
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"So, that really happened to Aunt Ginny?" Sean Weasley (Fred's son) and Jeremy said in unison and Marissa nodded. James had heard the story already on the train and was absorbed in a Quidditch magazine article his father had written the week before.
She was sitting in the Great Hall with all her cousins. They were exchanging Christmas stories and she was telling them about her dream that wasn't really a dream.
Sean and Jeremy were sitting on her left doodling on their parchment trying to procrastinate on their Potions assignment.
Molly, who was George's daughter and her younger brother Kenny were on her other side. Jillian and Cassandra were in front of her sharing a magazine and talking in low voices about their boyfriends.
Marissa turned to Gabe, Bill's son and looked at him evenly. He was the one who asked who the guy was.
"I didn't ask. At first I didn't want to know. Now, I'm thinking maybe I could find him in one of the books in the library."
"What year was he? Did your mum tell you that?" Arthur who was two years younger than his brother, Sean, asked.
"Fifth year and she was seventh…Head Girl. I remember exactly what he looked like," Marissa had an image pop in to her head and she closed her eyes for a minute trying to get rid of it. She felt a hand on her shoulder and turned, seeing Devon standing there. He leaned over and stole a pretzel which was sitting in a bowl in front of her.
"Maybe she doesn't want to talk about it anymore," he said and Marissa raised an eyebrow at him, then turned to Arthur not minding talking about it.
"Why are you so concerned about him? He isn't around her anymore," Jillian said raising her eyes long enough to steal a pretzel and glance at Marissa.
"I wish I knew. Something bugs me about him…maybe it'll come to me later."
"What DID he look like?" Molly asked listening intently, her blue eyes blinking slowly. She had been listening with rapt attention for the past ten minutes since Marissa brought it up.
"Big, dark hair that was really short, tall…probably James' height," Marissa referred to James' almost six foot frame. "I can't really describe it. Next time I am in the library and NOT studying, I'll see if I can find him."
"Why don't you just ask your mum?" Cassandra asked propping her chin in her hand.
"She won't tell," Dixon said and Derek agreed.
Reggie sat a bit off to the side and looked at Marissa. He wasn't usually talkative and seemed to not mind sitting
outside the circle.
"You said he was in Slytherin. I could find that alumni book in the common room if you wanted."
Everyone turned to look at him and he blushed. He was a fifth year and the first of the Weasley's to be sorted into Slytherin. Ginny had said it was because of the way his father acted and pretty much disowned his family making the Ministry of Magic his home.
"If you get a chance that would be great, Reggie," Marissa nodded at him and briefly wondered what her Uncle Percy (whom she really didn't think of as an Uncle) would think of his only child helping the rest of the family.
"Aunt Ginny won't tell; probably knows we would all go try and find him and kick his arse…in the typical Weasley way," Sean said sounding just like his father and Uncle George.
There was a murmur of agreement and Marissa decided she had enough of her ten cousins and stood up, declaring she was going to head back to her common room and get started on studying for her OWL Potions exam that was going to happen in June. Erin waved at her, not looking up from her book she was sharing with Taryn Potter and briefly Marissa wondered where Brian was. She had seen him on the Express but he was sitting in another compartment with that guy Mark she had met at Hogsmeade and a few other fifth years.
Marissa trudged up the stairs and said the password to the portrait blocking the door to the Ravenclaw tower and entered into the Common Room, noticing a new note on the board.
Hogwarts Valentines Day Dance
Friday, February 14 at 7pm
Great Hall
Open to Third Years and up
Marissa stared at it for a minute and jumped as Calvin stood next to her.
"You going?"
Marissa shrugged and glanced over at him. His face was all red from being outside and his brown hair was standing in every direction.
"What were you doing? You look like you got caught in a tornado!" Marissa began laughing as he ran his hands through his hair.
"Pick up Quidditch game. Potter kept chasing me away from the Snitch. It was a no holds barred game…pretty fun actually." Calvin took off his cloak and threw it over the back of his shoulder. "Gotta go get cleaned up…you studying down here?"
"Yes, Potions," Marissa waved as he limped up the stairs to the boys dorm, and giggling to herself she found a table in the corner that wasn't taken. She set down her bag and found her book, chatting to Janet who showed up and together they sat, joined by Calvin and another Ravenclaw and studied until dinner that Sunday night.
---------------
January 14th arrived with bright sunshine as a foot of snow covered the grounds for Marissa's 15th birthday.
She woke up to find gifts piled at the end of her bed and with Janet's help she went through and found everything from new clothes from her parents, some books from her Aunt Samantha and a signed copy of the Canons (to the dismay of her father) Quidditch poster and from the Potter's she found a beautiful bracelet with her garnet birthstone set in silver circles. She clipped it on her wrist, and chatting happily to her dorm mates she dressed and made her way downstairs to start her day, wishing that her birthday fell on a weekend.
Marissa had placed her "dream" on the back burner and was a bit more calm after no one jumped out at her or scared her as she walked through the halls day after day.
"Happy Birthday," a voice said behind her as she walked from the Great Hall to her potions class.
"Hi Brian…long time no see," Marissa said warmly falling into step next to him.
"Quidditch is ruling my life. Trying to beat the pants off Slytherin next weekend, so we've been practicing a lot. Combine that with OWLs and that leaves time for…absolutely nothing!"
"I hear you," Marissa reached back and untangled her hair from the strap of her bag, swearing she was going to get it cut. She was probably going bald from all the times it got stuck in her bags straps, in the laces of her robes even running a brush through it after a shower.
"So…what's this I hear about some vision you had with your mum?" Brian asked and Marissa paused for a moment, wondering how he knew…then realized Erin probably told Laura or one of his sisters and it made it back to him. So, she gave him the abbreviated version, leaving out the part that Devon stayed with her because she was too afraid, at that moment, to be by herself.
"That must have freaked you out a bit," he stepped back and let her enter the classroom first. She looked up at him to answer and stopped for a moment, catching something unsaid in his dark brown eyes.
"What?" he asked seeing a questioning look come to her face.
"I was going to ask you that," she trailed off for a moment as his eyes searched hers.
"You look…different," Marissa tilted her head and they looked at each other until Brian heard someone call his name and he tore his gaze away from hers and looked over her head…
`…that was it!' Marissa thought as she walked quickly to her seat and sat down, automatically looking at the board where her father had written today's lesson. `Brian's taller…I had to look up at him. When did THAT happen?'
`So, he will be 16 in a few months and all of a sudden he's taller; I turn 15 and what happens to me except I turned a year older?' she mulled this over as she absentmindedly drummed her fingers on the desk in front of her.
She was lost in her thoughts about growth spurts when she felt a hand on her shoulder and glancing up she saw it was her father, talking to Harry who was standing next to him. Marissa's eyes flicked between the two of them and heard them talking about Quidditch; then Harry gave her a smile and turned around walking out of the room. Her father turned around and let his hand drop from her shoulder.
"Happy Birthday," he said quietly and she thanked him then watched him walk up towards his desk and gather the exams they had taken before the holiday's. Marissa wondered why they were talking about Quidditch…maybe there was something wrong with the practice schedule, as she didn't usually see either of them in the other's classroom.
As her father walked around, handing back exams he began talking about how this was the best class he had ever taught because everyone received "O"s and someone from Gryffindor asked if they could leave early as a reward.
Draco actually laughed out loud at that then quickly brought himself under control.
"Good try, but no," and Marissa smiled at the obvious surprise most of the class showed when he laughed. She enjoyed it when someone caught her father off guard because then a glimpse of the "real" Draco Malfoy came through. Taking out a quill as her test was passed back to her, she started copying down the formula off the board and it was at the end of the lesson that she realized she was going to give herself a birthday present.
Purposefully hanging back until the 6th years came in, Marissa took her time packing up her bag and thanking her father, and her mother indirectly, for her birthday gifts. She was happy to see Cassandra walk in, knowing it was her because she wore glasses and Jillian didn't.
"Cassandra, I'm going to take you up on your offer," Marissa said quickly and Cassandra's dark eyes lit up.
"Brilliant! Meet me outside the Gryffindor portrait after dinner and I'll let you in; we can do it in our room."
Jillian and Cassandra shared a room in the tower and she hoped most of their dorm mates would be gone; she didn't want this to take place in front of more than her relatives.
Saying "Goodbye", she walked quickly to her Transfiguration class…deciding now that she was 15 it was time to do something a bit drastic…that is-- a bit drastic for Marissa Malfoy.
--------------
"Well, what do you think, cuz?" Cassandra stepped back from Marissa, who was perched on the chair in front of Jillian's desk. Jillian held up a mirror and Marissa looked and stifled a gasp.
Her almost waist length hair was now almost touching her shoulders. She had fringe and her cousin had layered her hair so it fell softly about her face, making her cheekbones seem higher and her blue gray eyes even brighter.
"I love it. Why didn't you get me to do this sooner?" Marissa touched her fringe, then let her hand drop to her lap.
"You have Malfoy and Weasley genes. We couldn't use a giant to get you to change your mind about anything," Cassandra said, pleased that her first major hairstyle had gone on without a hitch.
"It's gorgeous. You look older!" Janet breathed from the bed. Her hair was already short and blond, but Marissa felt she needed a friend there to keep her firmly believing that she wanted to cut her hair.
"I bet your own brothers and sister won't even recognize you!" Janet stood up and walked around in a circle around Marissa, touching her head lightly. "It makes your hair look even more blond than red now."
"I bet Brian won't even recognize her," Jillian said flippantly, putting her mirror back on top of her dresser.
"Why would that matter?" Marissa asked, helping to clean up the hair with some wand movements around the chair and even on herself.
"Nothing…," Jillian said quickly and Cassandra darted a quick glance to her sister only Janet caught.
Marissa however, being the Ravenclaw she was caught some hidden meaning in Jillian's voice.
"What?" Marissa stood up and straightened her button down green shirt and smoothed her jeans. Feeling she had straightened up enough, she then gave Jillian the Malfoy glare, arms crossed and everything.
"Geeze Marissa, I was just saying…," Jillian said in an exasperated voice, running a brush through her long red hair and catching Marissa's glare in the mirror.
"What my dear sister means is we have noticed Brian noticing you more lately, so we would be interested to see what his reaction is. I bet he's in the Common Room right now actually," Cassandra said not catching the look of surprise move across Marissa's face, then shaking her head like a dog clearing the water out of his eyes.
"Wait. You're saying…," Marissa looked over at Janet who shrugged at her, not knowing what the Weasley twins were trying to get at.
"We live in the same tower as him. We've heard him mention your name-," Jillian began hopping onto her desk and swinging her legs.
"We have Potions together and have been friends since-," Marissa began, hands on her hips.
"Birth…we know. But…let's just say a few girls have asked him to the Valentine's Dance and he's said "No thank you" and I've heard him mention your name more than what would be normal for having classes together…so don't get all worried. It's just an observation," Cassandra finished for her sister.
"Great…now that you said that how in the hell am I supposed to act in front of him?"
"You're a Malfoy; you can hide your feelings very well," Janet said and Marissa was about to answer when she realized what Janet had just said.
"My feelings?" Marissa stared at Janet.
"STOP!" Jillian yelled holding up her hands. "Look, we were just saying and Marissa, we don't need to know what your feelings are or aren't towards a specific Potter. But I can tell you this," Jillian hopped down and put her hands on Marissa's shoulders and looked at her (being the same height at 5'7" it wasn't hard), "if he is speechless for more than a few seconds after he sees you with that awesome hair…he likes you, more than a friend."
Janet started giggling and Marissa cut her a look.
"Great, no uncomfortable feelings there," Marissa stepped back and looked at the clock on the end table. "Janet and I should get going. We have Herbology to do. Thanks for doing my hair."
"Happy Birthday...anytime!" Jillian and Cassandra said and held the door for them and Cassandra followed them down the stairs to meet up with her boyfriend, Chad…a seventh year.
As Marissa walked down the Gryffindor stairs she caught sight of James playing chess in the corner and Brian reading something as he stretched out on the sofa. It was Taryn Potter who saw Marissa first and her eyes went wide from across the room.
"Marissa!" she shrieked and Marissa spun around to see Brian's sister running over. "You cut your hair. Merlin! It looks great!" She was practically jumping up and down, her green eyes bright with excitement. "I love it! Did Cassandra do it?"
"I did," Cassandra's voice floated over to them. She was talking to Chad, while sitting in his lap near the fireplace. As Marissa swung her gaze from her cousin it paused on Brian who was in the same position as before but his head was turned towards her. Cassandra came bounding over a second later and stepped in Marissa's line of sight of Brian.
"I'll drag you over there so you don't ogle each other across the room," Cassandra grabbed Marissa's hand who's eyes went wide and a million retorts were at the tip of her tongue. Cassandra pulled Marissa behind her with Taryn and Janet close behind. Brian sat up, placing his book on the cushion next to him.
"Ok, Potter…a male's opinion would be nice," Cassandra said pulling Marissa up next to her, who was trying to stop her heart from hammering in her chest. He was looking at her with a look of complete surprise on his face and she backed up as he stood, tucking his hands in his jeans pockets. She had never been in the Gryffindor Common Room before and he seemed genuinely surprised to see her there, then as his eyes lingered on her face and hair, his eyebrows shot up into his fringe.
Marissa felt Jillian squeeze her hand before dropping it as if silently telling her that it was more than a few seconds that Brian had remained speechless.
"Marissa Malfoy cut her hair," he said softly and smiled down at her. "It looks nice."
"Thank you," Marissa whispered, feeling slightly embarrassed that he was staring at her but she couldn't tear her eyes from his and for a moment everything seemed to go silent. She never noticed Cassandra pulling Janet towards the portrait or Taryn scampering away to the corner of the room to play chess with James.
"What made you decide to get your hair cut?" he asked reaching out as if to touch it, then letting his hand fall by his side.
"It's been annoying me and I thought I would do something different, a birthday present for myself. OH," Marissa remembered the bracelet that was from the Potter's, "thank you and your parents for the lovely bracelet."
She held up her arm and admired the dainty bracelet and as if it happened in slow motion Brian reached out and took her hand, gently pushing back her sleeve to look at the bracelet.
And that's when Marissa realized something. The minute his hand touched hers, as if her fingers had a mind of their own they closed around his. He raised his eyes from her wrist and her breath caught in her throat as she felt his hand tighten around hers.
And the "something" she realized was that somewhere between getting on the Hogwarts Express that summer and her birthday she had developed deeper feelings for Brian Potter. Deeper than she ever thought she would have for a life long friend.
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