A/N Sorry it's been awhile. I was traveling almost the entire month of June and then I came back and had to deal with college stuff, so...yeah. Anyways, here is chapter six. However there are a few things I need to mention before you read it. First, I had to split chapter six up into two parts. I had to do this because otherwise chapter six was going to be ridiculously long, like over 10,000 words long. Plus, splitting it made me able to post the first half a.k.a. part 1 while I finished the second half. And secondly, everything in italics is a flashback. Okay, that's all you need to know. Oh, and please excuse any grammatical errors. I had to edit this kind of fast. Enjoy!
Ch. 6 A Plan Developed pt.1
"Don't live down to expectations. Go out there and do something remarkable". ~Wendy Wasserstein
By Friday night, Lily and James were back at the Potters' house. They were sitting in the parlor with the exception of Sirius who was upstairs somewhere. Sirius had tagged along with them to Potters' because so far, the sabotage plan wasn't going too well. They had argued for hours and hadn't come up with any sort of scheme. Well, they had come up with one, but Lily had flat out refused to do it. Now, they were back to square one. Lily and James were hoping that the contract would give them a few ideas.
"Well, now if everyone's settled," said Fabius M. Pasternak- their own personal marriage contractor. The guy was so ancient Lily thought he belonged in a museum. "I'll just hand out a copy of the contract to the betrothed." He was standing, but he was so hunched over that it looked more like he was sitting in an invisible chair.
Fabius thrust a crisp piece of parchment in her face. Lily hesitantly took it out of his wrinkled hands, fearing what she was about to read.
Marital Binding Contract
The Merge of Evans-Potter
In order to legally bind the marriage of James Harold Godfrey Potter and Lillian Rosemarie Evans, the following Guidelines of Marital Binding must be met six months prior to the ceremony. Following the guidelines, the Articles of Marital Binding state what is to take and what is not to take place during the marriage. Violation of an article may result in a Marital Probation or ultimately a Marital Separation. Any further questions concerning the process of Marital Binding can be answered by the family's personal legal contractor.
Guidelines of Marital Binding
I. The Marital Binding Contract must be signed by both parties six months prior to the ceremony.
II. The ceremony date must be set six months prior to the ceremony.
III. The future bride must be tested and concluded to be fertile before signing.
IV. A formal engagement announcement is required.
V. Signing of the Marital Binding Contract requires a legal contractor from the Ministry of Magic to witness the signing.
Articles of Marital Binding
I. Both parties must be married by Christmas of their eighteenth year.
II. Once married, the newlyweds will officially take their titles as Lord and Lady.
III. The wife is required to take the husband's name.
IV. The first child must be born five years after the marriage. (. A male heir is preferred but not required.)
V. The husband determines whether or not the wife may obtain a profession.
VI. The wife determines whether or not her husband can take a mistress.
VII. If the wife chooses for her husband not to have a mistress, unfaithfulness will not be tolerated and will result in an immediate Marital Probation.
VIII. An unfaithful wife is never tolerated and will result in an immediate Marital Probation or Marital Separation.
IX. Illegitimate children are deeply frowned upon (with a mistress) and will result in a Marital Probation. If the husband does not have a mistress than a Marital Separation will occur. In the case of an illegitimate child/children (in cases concerning both a mistress and a non mistress), the family will not recognize the child as part of their family, but the family will be allowed to support the child if they so choose.
X. Marital Separation(i.e. divorce) is hardly ever granted unless an Article is broken or both parties express extreme unhappiness in the marriage (see legal Contractor for more in-depth information concerning Marital Separation).
Once the legal contractor has checked and shown that all guidelines have been abided by, the families may officially sign the contract.
The Evans
_________________________________
(Lord Christopher Maxwell Evans III)
__________________________________
(Lady Sophia Kathleen Staffard-Evans)
__________________________________
(Lillian Rosemarie Evans)
The Potters
__________________________________
(Lord Godfrey Harold James Potter)
__________________________________
(Lady Viviane Constance Wortham-Potter)
__________________________________
(James Harold Godfrey Potter)
Verification by Legal Contractor
__________________________________
(Fabius M. Pasternak)
On behalf of the Ministry of Magic, we offer our congratulations to the future husband and bride-to-be. We wish you a lifetime of happiness.
Sincerely,
Milicient Bulstrode
The Minister of Magic and Staff.
"Well, are there any questions or concerns about the contract?" Fabius asked, eagerly waiting for Lily or James to respond.
Lily didn't know where to start. The contract had been worse than she had thought. Honestly, what century were they living in? Was Lily incapable of making her own decisions? James was supposed to decide if she could work. Like hell he was! And don't even get her started on the whole mistress crap.
"Um, I have a question?"
Fabius instantly straightened up at the sound of her voice, eager for some sort of attention. "Yes. Go on." Lily could see her parents shifting nervously in their seats. A small smile spread across her lips, satisfied that she was making them nervous. Served them right for putting her through all this.
"Um, this contract doesn't exactly seem fair to me."
Sweat began to form on Fabius' eyebrows. "I...I don't think I quite understand what you mean Miss?"
"I mean this isn't Victorian times anymore. I shouldn't have to have James' permission to get a job. Marriage is more about partnership these days anyways. I should have an equal right to everything James does."
Fabius pulled a handkerchief out of his front pocket and wiped the sweat from his brow nervously. "Um, pardon me Miss, but that's exactly what you will get. This contract will entitle you to everything that Mr. Potter is entitled to- his estate, his inheritance, everything."
Lily couldn't hold back rolling her eyes. "That wasn't what I meant. What I meant was that I should be able to decide if I want to work or not, not James. And if he's allowed to take a mistress, I should be allowed to take a...mister?" She turned her head towards James and whispered. "Is that what they call it?"
James simply shrugged, oblivious to the conversation going on. Lily narrowed her eyes at him. He was looking at the contract dejectedly and was paying hardly any attention to what was going on around him. Lily was about to ask him what was wrong, when he spoke up for the first time that night.
"So, if Lily and I marry, we will become the new Lord and Lady Potter?"
That was when it hit Lily. He was going to become the new Lord Potter- a title James had been fighting since he had learned to talk. Lily knew James had no desire to take his father's title. He had no interest in politics, nor did he much care for the people who were involved in politics. As far back as Lily could remember, Mr. Potter had been pushing his son to be involved with the Ministry. On several occasions Mr. Potter literally had to drag James to the Ministry, which obviously didn't have much of an effect on James. James had never really embraced the thought of taking over his father's job and being the new Lord Potter. And as far as Lily could tell, he never would.
"Yes James," Lord Potter said, sternly staring James down. "When you and Lily marry, you will become the new Lord and Lady Potter."
Lily could hear the piece of parchment shaking in James' hand. He was getting angry, but he was trying to control it. The Potters could sense James' anger.
"James, we'll discuss this later," Mr. Potter said sternly. James nodded and set the contract down on the table in front of them. He slouched down in the expensive nineteenth century settee , too deep in thought to notice what was going on around him. Lily knew she had lost him. There was no way that she was going to get this contract changed unless James was on her side. But as of now, he was too fixated on his own problems to help her out at the moment.
"Lily," said Mr. Potter, hoping to advert everyone's attention from James, "please continue with what you were saying."
"Oh, umm..." It was useless to argue. It was five against one with an unwilling alibi sitting next to her. "Never mind. I just think we all need to look over the contract again. That's all."
Lord Potter nodded, Lily saw her parents sigh in relief. "Alright, if that is your wish." Lord Potter stood signaling the end of the 'meeting.' "Well, I think everything's settled. Thank you Mr. Pasternak."
Fabius took the soaked handkerchief out of his pocket and dabbed his forehead furiously before shaking Lord Potter's hand. "It's my pleasure Lord Potter, and I shall be in contact with you shortly."
Lord Potter nodded in agreement and turned his attention to his sulking son. "James, let's talk in my study."
Lily watched as James sighed and grudgingly got off the settee. Lily flashed him a reassuring smile. He tried to smile back but failed miserably and followed his father back into his study. Lily stood up too and was fixing to head upstairs, when she heard her mother call her over.
"Lily, could you come over here, please?"
Lily sighed and walked over towards her mother and Lady Potter.
"Yes?" she asked once she had approached their little group.
"Lily, I'm sorry this is such sort notice, but you're going to have to go to a healer tomorrow."
Lily stared at her mother dumbfounded. "What? Why?"
"Well, before we can go any further with this contract, first we have to make sure that you are capable of making babies."
Making babies? Lily rolled her eyes. Why did her mother always insist on sugarcoating everything. "Mother, even a dimwit can consummate a marriage."
Mrs. Evans frowned at her daughter. "Lillian, please don't be sarcastic. It's such an unbecoming quality."
Lily scowled at her mother, trying to restrain herself from sassing back at her. Unfortunately, Lily had enough mannerisms in her to know better than embarrass her mother in front of people- too bad her mother didn't possess the same characteristic..
"Anyways," Mrs. Evans said with a wave of her hand, "you have an appointment tomorrow at ten with a Mrs. Stom, and Viviane has offered to escort you to your appointment."
For the second time that night, Lily stared at her mother dumbfounded. "Wait, you're not going with me?"
Even as much as her mother grated her nerves, Lily still wanted her mother to go with her. Lily nervously began to bite her fingernails. Mrs. Potter was nice and all, but she would feel more comfortable going to a doctor with her mother. After all, she didn't know what to expect when she went for her check-up; her mother did, and she would be too embarrassed to ask Mrs. Potter to explain how these things worked..
"I know. I'm sorry Lily, but your father and I need to go back home tomorrow. Your sister's coming in from Surrey, and you know we've hardly seen her since she married Vernon last year." Lily nodded, slightly hurt that her parents hadn't invited her to go along with them to see Petunia.
Mrs. Potter squeezed one of Lily's shoulders. "There's noting to be nervous about dear. The procedures quite simple. You'll be out of that office in twenty minutes tops."
Mrs. Evans nodded along with Mrs. Potter. "She's right Lily. From what Viviane's told me, it's much simpler in the wizarding world than in our world, so you should consider yourself lucky. Okay?"
Lily nodded, trying to ease the dread in her stomach.
Mrs. Evans kissed her daughter's cheek. "Now go upstairs and get some rest."
Lily turned to leave but turned back towards her mother suddenly. "Tell Petunia I said hello." Lily, without waiting for a reply, ran up the stairs to her room.
*******
"James, it's not the end of the world."
James flopped into one of the big leather chairs in his father's study and narrowed his eyes. "Maybe not for you, but it is for me."
Mr. Potter sighed. "Don't go all teenager on me James. You knew this would happen eventually, so stop acting like this is the biggest shock of your life."
James cringed. Yes, he had known that this would happen one day. It's just that deep down, he had always hoped that it wouldn't. "Oh wait, you're right. This isn't the biggest shock of my life. No, that would be the time when you and mum went behind my back and had be betrothed."
Mr. Potter closed his eyes, trying to ignore his son's statement. "James," he said as slowly and as calmly as possible, "stop acting like a victim. I've told you over and over again that you would one day take my place as Lord."
"I know that, but why? I don't want it. I've never wanted it, so why do I have to do it?"
Mr. Potter slammed his fist on his desk, his patience with his son breaking."Because James, you owe it to your family! You were born into this family and you should take pride in the fact that you are indeed a Potter. Do you wish to dishonor your ancestors, or your mother and me?"
James sat back down in his seat, allowing himself to feel the first claws of defeat. His father wasn't going to understand that he had no desire to sit behind a desk all day long, looking through papers upon papers; nor was he going to understand that he didn't want to spend his weekends or holidays at some society party showing off his wife and his money. But his father didn't see it that way. To him, his job was a symbol of honor to his ancestors and to the Potter name. How was James supposed to argue against that? In one of the rare times in life, James cursed being an only child.
"Well?"
James sighed. "No. I don't want to dishonor you or mum."
Mr. Potter set back in his chair, satisfied with his sons answer. "Okay then. I think it's settled. You and Lily will become the next Lord and Lady Potter."
James was fixing to burst. He needed to say something- anything to get him out of this situation.
"It's not enough for me."
Mr. Potter took off his glasses, exhausted. "What do you mean it's not enough?"
"I mean, I want something more than sitting behind a desk, looking at paper work all day. I want something more exciting...more hands-on."
"More adventurous?"
"Yes!" Okay, his speech was a little lame, and he knew it sounded childish, but he refused to become his parents. Don't get him wrong, he loved his parents unconditionally, he just never wanted to live their lives. He wanted something more...meaningful?
"James, I know you've always had this zest for adventure, and I had always secretly hoped that you would grow out of it, but listen to me James. You can't be reckless when you're going to have a family. You have to stop thinking about what you want and start thinking about what your family wants. Did that ever occur to you? Did you ever think about what Lily wants you to do?"
James didn't respond- he couldn't respond. His mind was reeling.
"Now, lets end this on a good note." Mr. Potter pulled out a drawer in his desk. He reached one hand in and pulled out a semi-full bottle of firewhiskey. "Shall we?"
James still couldn't move. Even the sight of firewhiskey couldn't stir his senses.
Just then the door to the Mr. Potter's study opened. Mrs. Potter stood in the doorway. She looked at James, then Mr. Potter, then the firewhiskey. "Uh oh. What happened in here?"
Neither James nor Mr. Potter responded.
"I'm going to bed," James announced, quickly rushing past his mother before she could call him back. He could feel their eyes on him, probably in shock that he had voluntarily turned down perfectly good firewhiskey.
His mind was on overdrive. What would Lily want him to do?
********
Some time during Fourth Year
James was hiding again, or at least trying to find a place to hide.
Earlier in the kitchen he had overheard his father in the dining room telling his mother, "I'm going to take James to work with me today."
Yeah, sure Dad.
James immediately did a180 and bolted in the other direction.
Now, he was passing several items that looked like possible hiding places- a cupboard, a pile of laundry, the House Elves' bed chambers. Then, an epiphany!
She wouldn't mind too much if he used her wardrobe for a little while. At least, he hoped she wouldn't. James approached Lily's room and gently turned the door knob, knowing that she wouldn't be in there. He had come across her in the library earlier doing her homework of all things. James had been his usual charming self, while Lily had been her usual tempered, daughter-of-Satan self. Honestly, was that girl incapable of taking a joke? Apparently so. He had several marks on his body to prove it.
James grabbed his wand and muttered 'Lumos.' He took a moment and looked around the room. It physically disgusted him. This girl must be from outer space or from some other deranged place because no body on this earth could possibly be this neat. James looked at one of pictures on the wall in disgust. He reached out one hand and tilted the picture slightly, wanting one thing in the room to be imperfect.
Outside the door, James heard the shuffling of someone's feet. James sprinted across the room towards the wardrobe. He quickly climbed in and shut the door loudly. The door opened and James peered through the crack in the doors and saw Lily walk in wearing her usual t-shirt/jeans combo, a pair of dark red pigtails falling against her shoulder blades.
He watched Lily walk to her night stand and place her potions book on the table. Lily took a step back from the stand and looked around the room cautiously. James watched her cross the room and look at the picture he had tilted earlier. After several seconds of observation, Lily tilted it back to its rightful position. James couldn't help but let out a rather loud snort. Lily spun around and fixed her eyes on the wardrobe.
Before James could take any sort of action- not that he could really act. He was basically screwed.- Lily flung open the doors to the wardrobe.
James watched as Lily's eyes widened at the sight of him. He must have looked pretty ridiculous, sitting in Lily's wardrobe, tangled in one of her dresses. James tried to think of something to do or say that would make this situation seem less surprising. After much debate, James could think of only one thing to do, he smiled one of his most charming smiles.
It amazed him how quickly her face could change from shock to complete and total loathing with a simple face twitch.
"You little peeping Tom!" She shouted, pointing her wand at him menacingly.
James waved his arms frantically. "No! It's not like that Evans!"
"Oh really?"
"Yes! I was just hiding from my Dad! That's all I swear!"
Lily was still pointing her wand at his face, unconvinced. "You were hiding?"
"Yes."
"In my wardrobe?"
"Yes."
"Nice try Potter."
James dodged the end of her wand. "No, seriously Evans! What would be the last place my father would look for me, the House Elves' bed chambers or your wardrobe?"
That seemed to do the trick. Lily lowered her wand. "Oh."
James sighed, relieved he wasn't the victim of one of Lily's hexes. "Now, if you don't mind," he said shutting the door to the wardrobe again.
Lily grabbed a hold of the door and held it back. "Wait. So why are you hiding again?"
James sighed getting annoyed. "Mind your own business Poppy."
Lily narrowed her eyes at him. "Who's Poppy?"
James rolled his eyes. "You know, Poppy, the weirdo with pigtails that stick out to here." James moved his hands horizontal to his head, indicating how far they stuck out.
Lily touched one of her pigtails and scowled."That's Pippi Longstocking you git!"
"Same difference." James went to shut the door again, but she held it back again. "Evans!" She was really getting on his last nerve. His dad could come up here any second looking for him, and he was going to get caught all because Evans wouldn't let him shut the damn wardrobe.
"Tell me why you're hiding."
"My dad wants me to go to the Ministry with him."
Lily scrunched up her nose. "So?"
"So...I don't want to."
Lily narrowed her eyes at him again. "Why?"
James glared at her. "For your information Evans. I don't want to go to the ministry because I will be forced to see what my future beholds."
"What's that supposed to mean?"
James sighed. "It means that Dad is trying to breed me to become the next Lord Potter and to be quite frank Evans, I have desire to take that kind of job."
Lily was silent, for a moment, James thought he was actually going to get an ounce of sympathy from her. He really needed to learn not to get his hopes up. "You're one spoiled prat, you know that."
James blinked at her taken aback. "Excuse me?"
"You've been given an amazing opportunity James. Do you realize how lucky you are? Do you know how many people would kill to have what you have? Hell, I'm jealous of you! You get to take an active role in the ministry- in our government. You could make a difference! Most people work their entire lives and never achieve the position that you are being handed because you were simply born a Potter."
James couldn't believe what was flying out of her mouth, and what was even more unbelievable were all the feelings that she was stirring inside him. One part of him felt that Lily Evans had no right to criticize him. That she didn't understand half of the situation at stake here. Then there was another part of him, the part that he would rather fall over and die before revealing to her, that actually felt ashamed of himself. He had never looked at it from the perception that she had just laid out for him. He knew he was lucky and very fortunate, but it still didn't make want to become a Lord. He never had the ambition for it.
"It's not like that at all Evans! You think it's all about the government and the Ministry, but you're wrong. It's all about how great your family looks on the society pages of the Daily Prophet. I thought you of all people would understand that."
"If it's as bad as you say it is, then way don't you change it, make it right."
James snorted. "Don't be ridiculous. I can't change it. It's been that way for over 200 years."
Lily stared at him in disbelief. "I can't believe what I am hearing. James Potter can't do something." A small, mocking grin appeared on her lips. "I thought you were limitless."
James glared at her. She was slowly slicing into his pride- and ego. "If you think you can do it, then, by all means, you are more than welcome to my place Evans. Good luck, because you have 200 years working against you."
Lily snorted. "Yeah, like they're going to let a woman in government."
James' jaw dropped. Lily couldn't have possibly said something that stupid. "Are you blind? Our Minister is a woman! Did one of the House Elves slip something in your tea this morning?"
Lily fixed him with a pointed stare. Finally, she sighed and looked down at her knees. It was the first look of defeat that Lily had ever expressed. "You can't honestly believe that she's the one in charge. She's just a puppet. She's not actually calling the shots; it's all the men behind her. They keep her in power because they know she's easy to manipulate."
James didn't know how to respond to that. He had heard enough talk among people, especially from his parents, that their current Minister was just a crowd pleaser. She didn't really have a clue what the wizarding world needed, or how to deal with the growing Voldemort situation. She was too easily influenced by the people in power, and the people that could knock her out of power.
"You know it's so unfair!" Lily stood up suddenly and stomped over to her bed, sitting on the edge of it. "You who would rather throw around a stupid quaffle than be in a classroom, makes 'O's in all your classes. You, who would probably be happy bartending for the rest of you life, has one of the greatest opportunities in the world. And you're not even embracing it!"
James stumbled out of the wardrobe and stood in front of her. "What's your problem?" he asked defensively. "Just because I don't like to spend all my time with my nose in a book, does not mean that I don't deserve the grades that I get. Because believe it or not Lily, I do study and I do work hard. And while you were lecturing me on how I was missing the greatest opportunity of my life, did it ever occur to you that maybe it's the only opportunity that I have?"
"No, it didn't occur to me because that's not true. You have every opportunity in the world. You come from a good family, you're smart- yes Potter, I said you were smart- you have no restrictions holding you down."
"What? Of course, I have restrictions; everyone does."
Lily shook her head and stared down at her feet. "No you don't, not like I do."
James was completely caught off guard. "What? That's absurd. People adore you. Everybody is always bragging about how witty and smart you are. If anything, you have more opportunities than I do."
Lily was shaking her head, and James was shocked to see her looking defeated. "No, I don't. I will only be able to get so far in life before they hold up a stop sign up in front of my face, telling me that I'm not allowed to move any further. No matter how talented or how qualified I am, it will always boil down to the fact that I am a woman and a Mudblood."
James cringed. "Don't use that word."
"Sorry," she said softly, still not looking up from her feet, "but it's true."
James was having a hard time processing everything she was saying. Yes, he came from a well-respected Pureblood family, and yes he was smart. But would those two things alone get him anything he wanted? Did it make him better than her? He didn't think so. And what was all that about having no restrictions? He had restrictions. Everyone did. His were just less visible than others.
Suddenly, James was sick of talking about all this. He didn't want to defend himself anymore. He wanted someone like Sirius who would agree with him and tell him that he shouldn't have to become the next Lord Potter. Someone who would make him feel better about himself, instead of worse. Someone unlike Lily, who was just giving him a massive headache.
"Why do you care so much what I do with my life anyways?"
Lily shrugged, staring down at her feet. "I don't."
James scoffed,"You're lecturing would suggest otherwise."
She chuckled, and slowly lifted her eyes to meet his for the first time. "I don't know. Maybe I'm just being selfish. Maybe I'm hoping that if you were to get involved in the government that maybe one day you would fight for people like me, fight for those who feel limited."
And for the first time, James Potter was completely at loss of words.
***
"Good god woman! Could you go any slower!"
James smirked at Sirius' impatience and gently pushed the door to his room open just as Lily was fixing Sirius with an icy stare.
"Black, if we're going to do this, we're going to do it right. No matter how long it takes me to stir this potion."
Sirius rolled his eyes and turned his attention towards James. "Hey mate! How did the interrogation go?"
Lily turned around and smiled at James as he passed by her. James smiled back and stretched out on his bed. "It was the usual. I told him I didn't want to take his job, and he through in my face that I would be disgracing my family."
Sirius clicked his tongue and lazily put his hands behind his head. "Tough luck Prongs."
James shrugged, not wanting to discuss it any further. He just wanted to forget about it for now. "So what are you two up to?"
Lily and Sirius grinned at each other. "We've come up with a bit of a plan."
James raised an eyebrow. "Really?" He looked between them. "You two? I'm impressed."
Sirius glanced sideways at Lily. "Well technically I did. Lily really sucks at this."
Lily banged her stirrer against the cauldron. "Well, excuse me if I'm a rookie."
Sirius snorted. "Rookie? Replacing somebody's shampoo with frog spawn is rookie material. What you were coming up with was just plain lame."
Lily scoffed and turned her attention back to the potion.
James chuckled. "So what exactly are you planning then?"
Sirius grinned mischievously. "Well if all goes according to plan, all your problems shall be solved by tomorrow afternoon. Evans? Would you be so kind as to tell Mr. Potter here our course of action?"
Lily set down her stirrer and turned to face them. "Well tomorrow, I have an appointment with a Healer to make sure that I am fertile before we get married."
"Fertile?"
Sirius started laughing. "You know so that she can..." he leaned over the arm of his chair, bursting into a rare fit of hysterics, "so that she can have your kids."
A light heat rose in his cheeks. Oh right, that kind of fertile. He couldn't help but feel like him and Lily were being treated like some sort of breeding animals, which in a sense they were. He looked back at Lily who was staring at her shoes, a soft pink color tinting her cheeks.
"Anyways, so Sirius and I got to thinking, and I think we came up with a plan that will get us out of having to get married."
James sat on the edge of his bed, eagerly waiting to her the plan. "Well, what's the plan?" He had never really been one for suspense.
"That Evans take this potion here that will make her infertile. And since the contract states that the future bride must be fertile, you can say bye-bye to contract and adieu to marriage."
James' eyes widened. It was so simple and just crazy enough that it might actually work.
James jumped up, feeling ecstatic for the first time in weeks. "That's bloody brilliant! This could work! This could actually work!"
He was so thrilled, he practically mauled Lily, who was nearest to him, and enveloped her in a big bear hug.
"Oi! Watch the potion!" she said laughing. "Do you want this to work or not?"
Sirius leaned over the armchair again, cocking an eyebrow at them. "I wouldn't get too excited Prongs," Sirius said, as James let go of Lily. She quickly straightened her t-shirt and started messing with the potion again. "At the rate Evans is going, this potion won't even be done by tomorrow."
James chuckled as Lily rolled her eyes. "Will you let it rest already? Mixing potions can have dangerous consequences. I just want to make sure I do it right."
James snapped his head back towards her. "Mixing potions? What are you doing mixing potions?"
"Well," she began, pouring some sort of ingredients into the potion, "the potion in the book is actually for permanent infertility. But there's this other potion that counteracts the permanent aspect, making it only a twenty-four hour thing."
James eyed her dubiously. He thought their plan could actually be the ticket they were looking for to end their arranged marriage, but he didn't like the idea of Lily mixing potions. It was risky, even for him. He wanted to get out of this marriage, but not to the extent that Lily might hurt herself over it.
"Don't you think that it's a little risky, you know, mixing potions?"
Lily shrugged, but he caught the hesitation in her face. "I know it's risky, that's why I'm not letting either of near it."
"Hey, I take offense to that," Sirius muttered, while flipping through one of James' Quidditch magazines.
"Good," she retorted, turning back to her now boiling potion.
"Look," James said, "this plan is good and all, but I don't want you to get hurt over it."
Lily sighed and smiled reassuringly to James. "James, I appreciate your concern, but I swear it will be fine. People mix potions all the time."
Yeah, but they're all professionals, James thought.
"Personally, I think she should've taken the damn infertility potion and called it quits to reproducing," Sirius remarked. "It's bad for our society anyways."
Lily rolled her eyes. "Boy, you sure are a ball of sunshine today. And not that it's any of your business, but I do want to have kids some day."
Sirius dropped his magazine and turned around in his chair. "Really?"
James looked at her skeptically. "Seriously? You want to have kids?"
Lily looked between them. Her eyes widening in bewilderment "What? Why is that so unbelievable?"
Sirius started whistling, and James shrugged, looking anywhere but at Lily.
Lily's jaw dropped. "I can't believe you two!" She dropped her wand and faced them furiously. "For your information, I would make a damn good mother! Why is that so hard to believe? Why would I- "
James tried to hold it in as long as he possibly could, but a tiny snicker escaped. It triggered the excessive laughter that soon erupted in the room, provided by him and Sirius of course. It took Lily a moment to catch on that they were teasing her.
"You bastards."
James and Sirius started laughing harder than ever. It was just too easy to get Lily riled up. It was hard to pass up an opportunity when it arose. Lily, on the other hand, was not amused. She turned her back to them, her face turning scarlet. She hated being laughed at, especially when it was him and Sirius who were doing the laughing. It was half of reason why it was so fun to get under her skin.
"You know what?" she fumed, turning back towards them, her confidence regaining. "I hope your guys' kids are as much as shits growing up as you two are."
Sirius picked up the magazine again, already losing interest in the conversation. "Prongs' kid might, but mine won't. I have no plans of reproducing."
Lily scoffed. "Why am I not surprised. What? Do you have something against children now?"
Sirius still sat in the armchair, thumbing through the magazine. "As I said earlier Evans, it's bad for society."
James and Lily glanced at each other. "And how do you figure that Padfoot?"
Sirius sat down his magazine again, and turned in his armchair, making sure he had their full attention. "Let me explain something to you less intelligent folk," he mused, earning a snort from Lily. "it's a little known fact, that parents screw up their kids in three ways. 1: Their parents hate each other and therefore set a bad example of relationships, therefore making the kid have commitment issues and basically screwing up the kid. Ms. Evans over here is a prime example of this."
Lily's jaw dropped. "I do not have commitment issues!"
Sirius and James let out a bark of laughter. "Oh really, then how long has it been since your last relationship?" Sirius asked.
James was pretty sure smoke was coming out of here ears. Her eyes were ablaze as she fixed Sirius with an icy glare, not wanting to answer his question. "You're one to talk about commitment issues Black."
Sirius laughed bitterly. "Oh Lillakins, we haven't even begun to cover me."
Lily folded her arms stiffly over her chest, steam still flowing out her ears.
"Okay, as I was saying...Reason 2: parents who have way too high expectations for their children, either A: feel disappointed in their kids and therefore the kids feel disappointed in themselves or B: the kids live up to their parents expectations and not their own, therefore in the end the kid ends up resenting their parents because they never reached their own expectations. Prongs is living proof of this."
James was flabbergasted. "What? I don't resent my parents?"
Sirius looked at his friend in pity. "One day my friend, you will. One day when you are sitting with all those society snobs, berating a restaurant for serving steak instead of veal, you will think about how you never reached your full potential."
James suddenly felt very sick to his stomach. He felt Lily jam him in the ribs with her elbow. "Hurts, doesn't it?"
James grunted in reply.
"Alright, and 3: is a combination of reason 1 & 2. And as I'm sure you all have guessed by now, I invented reason number 3. I am the reason number 3 exists. My parents-who are complete assholes by the way-can hardly stand to be in the same room with each other, and I'm pretty sure they haven't shared a bed since 1965. And now I want you all to take a moment and look at me. I'm sure you will all see in big bold letters Commitment-Phobic written across by forehead."
"Is that right under Mental Case?" James sniggered, pointing to a spot on his forehead.
Sirius gave James a pointed look but chose not to respond. "And then, on a wonderful, sunny day on November 5, 1960, I was born. My parents could not be more thrilled. I was the first boy born into the Black clan, therefore I held the entire Black name on my shoulders. Then I turned eleven and clobbered my parents dreams. On September 1, 1971, I was sorted into Gryffindor, and ever since then I have been dragging the family name in the mud. So, therefore, I am ten times more screwed up than the both of you, and that ten times will double if I have kid, therefore starting a treacherous, never-ending cycle that can never be stopped. And it's not only the kids that suffer, it's society. The ones that have been the cycle for awhile are the ones that end up turning into the rapist and murders, so I figured I would do my part in society and not have a fated fucked-up child."
Lily and James stared unblinkingly at Sirius for a moment, their mouths slightly open as their minds grasped everything he had just said. Finally, after several seconds of mental processing, James turned to Lily. "I think it's evident that Sirius has some unresolved anger from his childhood."
"Mate, have you met my mother?"Sirius commented.
James nodded in agreement. Lily gave her head a light shake, clearing all her thoughts, "Okay...enough of the psychiatry for the insane." She looked down at her cauldron, checking the cauldron. "Finally, this is done." she announced, grabbing a small bottle and pouring the potion in it.
Sirius looked at the bottle in disbelief. "We waited five hours- "
"We did not wait five hours."
Sirius scoffed. "Well it sure felt like it!"
Lily rolled her eyes. "Who cares. It's done, and I can finally go to bed."
James looked at the clock and was surprised to see that it was close to midnight.
"Hey Lils, you might want to make sure the potion works." Lily looked at him confused while Sirius turned around and gave James a sly grin. "Go ahead Prongs, try to impregnate her. You've got ten minutes to spare. It shouldn't take longer than that."
Lily's face turned a shade of red for the third time that night. "Black!" She came up behind him and gave his ear a sharp tug.
"Ow! Nails!"
"You're a pig," she smacked his shoulder, for added emphasis.
Sirius and James were roaring with laughter. Lily huffed and stomped out of the room, making sure to slam the door extra loud as she exited.
A/N Not the best chapter, but not the worst. The last scene was kind of lame, but please bare in mind that it's a two part chapter. Sorry it was kind of a filler, but the next chapter will actually involve the plan. I hope to have it up by next week at the latest. Anyways reviews or feedback of any kind would be greatly appreciated. I've been really depressed lately and could use anything to get my mind off things (this story has surprisingly helped a lot lol) And if you get bored and want to see something amusing check out these pictures that I found I had drawn awhile back on my livejournal. I sure got a kick out of them. http://ungraceful13.livejournal.com/ Peace!
-Ungraceful