A/N: I know, this is a bit quick on the posting, but I am so excited about a scene that happens here!! Like, trembling excited! There is just this one scene, really. I know this chapter is shorter than the last, but it is what it is… And this really is IT until Tuesday… or Friday… I don't know yet.
Lily sat in Mrs. Potter's office alone, her arms crossed. She tilted her head back to look at the ceiling, wondering why in the world someone would paint something so beautiful as the mural that was on the ceiling up where no one would ever see it. To really see it, you had to practically be lying down. As it was, Lily neck was starting to ache for the angle she had it tilted to look at the ceiling.
"It's beautiful, isn't it?" Mrs. Potter asked her as she entered the room. Lily nodded, not saying anything. Lily watched as the woman sat across from Lily, the chair quite close to Lily's chair. "I painted it, shortly after James was born."
"Really?" Lily asked despite herself. She was trying to keep her distance, but she was finding it hard to.
"Yes, James was such a sick little baby," Mrs. Potter said as she poured both of them some tea. "That first year, we weren't sure he was even going to live. He was such a sweet child, but so very sick. I painted this in a weekend, and day in and day out he and I would lay on this floor, therapist coming in and out to work with him. We had so many nannies, but none seemed to really truly care for him like I did, like Mrs. Miner does, like you care for Christopher."
"I am really sorry about overstepping my boundaries with the new nanny, but she was hurting him," Lily defended. Mrs. Potter patted Lily's hand.
"Anytime someone we love is being hurt, it makes perfect sense to intervene, even if they are only hurting a little," Mrs. Potter said. She sat back, sipping her tea. "I have decided to fire the new nanny. She isn't right for Christopher. He needs someone who loves him to be his nanny."
"Is he ok?" Lily asked. Mrs. Potter nodded smiling at Lily.
"Christopher is fine, he is alright. The question is, are you alright?" Mrs. Potter said quietly.
"I am fine," Lily lied. Mrs. Potter smiled again.
"You remind me a lot of myself when I was your age. I was always on, if you know what I mean. I was always in control, and then one day things started spiraling out of control. It was about that time that I realized that I was never in control," Mrs. Potter said. "I know that we have put a lot of pressure on you here, and some of it was completely out of hand. I have already spoken to Sirius about his middle of the night snacking, and everything. Same with James' unusual attempt to get you to notice him."
"Mrs. Potter, I do appreciate it, but I can't stay here," Lily interrupted. Mrs. Potter didn't say anything. "I really do appreciate the chance that you have given me, and I don't mean to sound ungrateful, but this is more than I counted on. I haven't had a good night sleep since, well, I can't remember. I have no idea what I am doing half the time, and the other half of the time, I am too tired to care. I thought that I could handle living under the same roof and nothing would change, but I can't deny that it has."
"What's changed, Lily?" Mrs. Potter asked her kindly. Lily looked away, almost as if she was ashamed. She refused to look at her, or to reply. "Ok, you don't need to tell me, but hon, you really are doing a wonderful job. I know the boys have really gone out of their way to make your life difficult, even without really meaning to. I just don't want you to leave."
"Mrs. Potter, I can't stay. I have to go, for my own well being and to continue earning enough money so that I can go back to school in a month," Lily said to her. Lily finally looked at her.
"I told you, Lily, that I would be more than happy to pay for your education," Mrs. Potter reminded her. "This isn't about your pride, this is about making life a little easier for you. In fact, it is already done."
"No, Mrs. Potter!" Lily exclaimed. She was shaking slightly, though it was hard for Lily to pin point which of her many emotions she was currently afflicted with. It was getting too difficult to determine anymore.
"Listen, Lily," Mrs. Potter said as she placed her cup down. She took a deep breath. "I promised Albus that I would keep you here all summer, and I intend to keep my promise. You can't even begin to know what it is like out there for a muggle born witch in this day and age. I was muggle born, did you know that?"
"No," Lily said quietly.
"Well, I was. My parents were muggles, but then my sisters and brothers were all witches and wizards. Quite odd, actually," Mrs. Potter told her. "The point is, I promised to keep you here, to keep you safe. Surely you know what is going on all around us? The disappearances aren't accidents. Dumbledore himself asked for us to take you in, and we glad did so. Your schooling was never in jeopardy. Even if you were dirt poor and homeless, Dumbledore would never let someone as bright as you go with out an education."
"But, Mrs. Potter, I just can't," Lily said again. She felt like crying again.
"Is it James?" Mrs. Potter asked. Lily didn't confirm or deny. Mrs. Potter smiled at her again. "How about this? Ryan and I are taking the boys to the coast for a week. Why don't you stay here, as our guest? Mrs. Miner is feeling back to her old self, and I know she is itching to take care of her James. I know being under the same roof as James can be a challenge sometimes. When a Potter man has his sights on something not even death can deter him. We have the pool house."
"The pool house?" Lily asked slowly.
"Yes, and so you wouldn't feel like you are getting a free ride, you can help us out with Christopher. His mother and I had a long talk, and she is going to take a more active role in his care," Mrs. Potter said quietly. She smiled again at Lily. "You would still have to come up to the house to eat, but you would eat with us like family. I want you to think of us as your family, whatever you decide to do."
"Can I think about it?" Lily asked slowly. Mrs. Potter beamed.
"That's a start!" She said cheerfully. She glanced at her watch. "Well, it's almost nightfall, so I imagine Remus is being confined to the basement chambers. I know it sounds awful, but he and the boys have fun together down there."
"Isn't that dangerous?" Lily asked. Mrs. Potter grinned.
"Not when they are Anamagi," Mrs. Potter confessed.
"They are? But that is very advanced for them, and I didn't really get the impression that they enjoyed transfiguration," Lily said quickly.
"The things that you will do for love, be it friendly love of four friends, or lovely love between a man and a woman," Mrs. Potter said as Lily stood and left. Lily headed down the back stairs, passing Remus as he headed down to the basement. He gave her a half-hearted wave as he disappeared. James hung back, watching as Lily opened the door. James followed her.
"Where are you going, Lily?" James asked her as she pushed her hair behind her ears.
"For a walk," Lily said simply.
"But, it's raining," James told her. She made a face at him.
"I don't care. It's only rain, and I need to clear my head," Lily said as she conjured herself an umbrella.
"I gather that, but with the full moon, there are dangers out there," James said quietly. "I would hate to see you get hurt."
"Really?" Lily said before she could stop herself. James nodded.
"Of course," James said. He reached and squeezed her hand. "Take care of yourself and be careful out there. I have to go, it'll be time for Remus' change soon, and I will need to be in there."
"You need to be careful too, and I have to say I am impressed, really, about the whole Anamagi thing, even if you are illegally doing it," Lily said. James shot her one of his stunning smiles and headed down to the basement. Lily stepped out into the back garden, holding the umbrella. The rain, the late summer shower, poured down around her, shaking the trees. Lily looked up and watched the lightening, thinking it might be better to get wet without an umbrella than to be dry and be struck because she had one.
The rain felt good on her skin, and she sat in the hammock under the trees. She knew it wasn't the safest place to be, but still, she wasn't really thinking logically as she climbed into the roped hammock. The wind rocked her; the trees sheltered her from all but the most ambitious rain drops. The thunder comforted her, and the lightening gave her a show.
Lily wasn't sure at what point she fell asleep, but she knew she had. She couldn't explain her stream of thoughts any other way. She had told the ex-nanny that she was going to marry James Potter. The boy she spent her life avoiding. She had said it without hesitation. She sighed. The funny thing is, now she really could see herself marrying him. She blushed, though it was lost in the darkness.
`What do you want from life, Lily Evans?' She asked herself silently. That was the thing. Up until this summer, husband and kids never played into that so closely. It was always finish Hogwarts and go to ATA. Maybe some time distantly down the line, she would marry and perhaps have kids. Now, she was lounging in this hammock in the back yard of James Potter's house and she was thinking how nice it would be to raise a child. With him. James.
`You have it so bad,' Lily teased herself. Lily laughed into the darkness, sleep finally really coming and taking over. She closed her eyes, knowing full well she was out in the open, exposed, in the middle of a nighttime summer storm, on the night of the full moon. This was so unlike her.
"Lily?" A voice whispered distantly. Lily slowly opened her eyes. It was still dark out, but only just so. The rain had stopped and birds were starting to wake. Morning was on the horizon.
"Huh?" Lily grunted sleepily.
"Did you sleep out here all night?" James asked as he swung the hammock gently as he stood by it.
"Uh, I must've," Lily said sleepily. She yawned and stretched sleepily. "Now, go away. I was in the middle of a really good dream."
"Was it about me?" James asked reflexively. "Sorry, Lily, I am trying to be a little more suave around you, but you make it difficult, if I don't say so myself."
"What time is it?" Lily asked.
"Just after six," James said. He continued to push the hammock, and Lily let her eyes drop closed again. It was something in the swaying of the hammock that relaxed her right back to sleep, though part of that could have been because she was incredibly tired.
"James?" Lily asked a while later.
"Mmm-hmm," James replied quietly. She opened her eye and watched him for a minute in silence. It was brighter now, probably closer to seven than six. He was still swinging the hammock gently.
"Why do you think that we constantly struggle, you and I?" Lily asked sleepily. A slight smile crossed his face slowly and he looked at her.
"I have my theories," James said. He laughed quietly and stopped the swinging motion. "I have been standing here for an hour swinging you. I think you should come on in, take a shower, and have some breakfast."
"Ok," Lily agreed after a minute. She was surprised when James offered his hand to help her from the hammock. She couldn't help but smile as she took his hand and stood. If this was how James normally would act around her, she would have dated him a long time ago. He was so sweet, so kind, and not the least spastic as he was normally.
They parted in the kitchens and Lily headed to her little room to take a shower. She smiled to herself as the overly warm water poured over her, caressing her body.
"Yes, just like a lover," Lily said aloud, smiling. She stepped from the shower and dried off, dressing in her muggle clothes. She hadn't made her decision, but she was close. The only thing she was certain of was that she was not going to wear that dreadful uniform anymore.
"Lily," Mrs. Potter said smiling as Lily hesitantly walked into the family dining room. She was surprised to see James and his friends at the table. They must have seen her surprise, because they shrugged sheepishly. Apparently wise to their antics, Mrs. Potter had required them to all present to the breakfast table to eat.
"Thank you," Lily said as she pulled out a chair next to Remus. She ate silently while the others chatted. Mr. Potter was reading the Daily Prophet, handing the read sheets to Lily so she could read them too. She thanked him and folded the paper in such a way that she wouldn't be intrusive to the conversation flow of the room.
"So, have you decided what you are going to do?" Mrs. Potter said casually as she dabbed her mouth with her napkin. Lily looked up at her, not surprised to find all eyes on her. Lily smiled and placed the paper down on the table.
"I have," Lily said. She didn't look at James, because if she did she knew she would blush. "I will go ahead and take you up on that offer to move into the pool house in exchange for helping out with Christopher. You have been so nice to me, I couldn't very well be selfish, and have you break your promise to Professor Dumbledore."
"Very good," Mrs. Potter said excitedly. "After breakfast, Sirius and James will move your belongings to the pool house. We leave this afternoon for the coast, but we will be back next Thursday, just in time for the arrival of all the Potters on Saturday."
"Then I can properly introduce you to my cousin, Jenna," James said apologetically as he smiled at Lily. Lily didn't reply with more than a single nod before she turned back to reading the Daily Prophet.
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