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Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Harry Potter characters; they all belong to J.K Rowlings and Warner Brothers. Although I wish I did lol.
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A/N: Hello again everyone! Yes I finally updated within reasonable amount of time. All those reviews just made me want to get another chapter out as soon as possible. And I do appreciate all the constructive criticism I've been getting. I am going to add more detail of Hermione's day since that seems to be what majority wants. I actually received inspiration for this chapter around 2am and decided to write. I hope my roommates can forgive me once they've seen what I can actually come up with. I feel bad for being up but I just had to write to get my mind clear. So without further ado on with the new addition. Thank you once again for all the great response…please do keep on reading and reviewing, it's very much appreciated.
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The Diary of Hermione Granger
Chapter 5/?
By: Sapphire Rose (aka Lily Flower)
October 29th
Dear Diary,
So many things have happened in the past day I have no idea where to begin with it all. I might as well start with the fact that Gryffindor won their Quidditch match yesterday against Slytherin. It was an amazing victory; the game only lasted a few hours with Harry catching the snitch in the end. It had been the first game of the year but everyone around Hogwarts treats this game as though it were for the Cup. Everyone knows that Gryffindor and Slytherin are major rivals and the two houses were head to head in almost everything. I'm told it was a game that shouldn't be missed but my mind wasn't on the game as I watched. I was watching but the whole time my eyes rested upon the handsome face of Harry, I really do have it bad don't I? I just can't stop thinking about him and it's driving me mad! Most of the school crowded on the field to greet the Gryffindor team but I had hung back from the masses surrounding them. I noticed the crowd parting and Harry came through. Before I had time to realize what was happening he scooped me put and swung me around, holding me tight. I could swear at that moment my heart skipped a few beats as he put me down. The smile that he wore was breath taking.
Now I know what you're thinking, I was avoiding Harry so why would I show up to his Quidditch game, the most likely place to run into him? Well last night Harry confronted me and pulled me aside after dinner. I was originally planning to get in a few more hours of studying before I went to bed but as you can see those plans were dashed away the moment Harry came up to me. I was going to make some excuse initially but when I looked into his eyes I noticed something there. He seemed like a lot was going through his mind but he didn't know how to say it. This is where I felt ashamed for how selfish I've been acting over the past couple of weeks. I didn't mean to push Harry away, well then again I did but it was unintentional. I just needed some space to sort out my feelings and I didn't want to do something I would regret. I decided to see what Harry wanted to talk about even though part of me wanted to leave and hide in my corner.
We walked outside onto the grounds of Hogwarts and sat by the lake. It was mid-October so it wasn't too cold out just yet. I always thought this was the perfect temperature, not to hot or cold. We sat in silence until Harry finally spoke, I remember the words so clearly so I'll write some of the dialogue for you…
'Hermione lately I've noticed you've been distancing yourself from everyone including me. Now you don't have to tell me what's going on but I would like you to know that I'm here for you whenever you need to talk to someone. I just miss having you around; something about you always brings a smile to my face. It's almost as if your smile is what keeps me going most of the day and lately I haven't seen you smile and I'm worried about you and so is everyone else.'
'I'm so sorry Harry, I've had a lot on my mind and I've just been sorting it all out. I've missed you too, but I just need some space you know? I'm sorry if that seems selfish but that's the way I honestly felt. I didn't mean to distance myself that's just the way it happened.'
'It's alright, I don't blame you. Everyone needs some space every now and then. There are times I just want to lock myself in a room and never be bothered but we know how rare that happens.'
A slight had formed on my lips; Harry was always able to make a serious situation brighter than it was.
'So was this the only reason you wanted to talk to me?'
'No, I supposed you can tell I've got a few things on my mind and I don't really know where to begin.'
'Well it's always good to start where you think the beginning is.'
'Alright, well since you've been off in your own world I've been spending some time thinking about a few things. For instance my relationship with Lisa…'
There was that word, relationship. I wasn't sure if this was the best thing to be talking to him about because after all I had feelings for him. For some reason my legs didn't want to kick in and leave so I stayed and listened to what he had to say, even though the feeling in my heart was tearing up inside.
'Well what had been going on with your relationship with Lisa?'
'To be honest I think we've been drifting and it's mostly my fault. Don't get me wrong Lisa has been wonderful to me but I think I've been so distracted lately. I feel bad for having her tag along, she deserves better than that. So I wasn't sure exactly what to do, the again I know what is right I just don't think I can go through with it. I've never broken up with a girl before and I don't really want to hurt her.'
'Talk to her, that couldn't hurt. I'm sure she'll understand you if you just explain what's going on and then the two of you could come to some sort of agreement and see where you want things to progress to.'
That was the part of the conversation that stood out to me at that moment. You can imagine what I felt when Harry told me his feelings. I didn't want to seem too happy by the prospects but I couldn't help myself. I know it's wrong of me to feel this way but all the emotion I've been feeling had to burst out. So at that moment I decided to make an effort on my part to keep up appearances. I wasn't ready to tell Harry how I felt, especially if he was on the verge of breaking up with Lisa. But for the most part this was the greatest news I have heard in a long time. I know I should be concerned with other people's feelings but I just felt too happy for words.
This was just one small step to remedying the problems that have come up. I promise I won't sound too depressing anymore and I'll try to be more considerate. One thing is for sure I'm not going to avoid any of my friends. This is the start of a brand new moment in my life and I hope it's for the better.
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Harry's Thoughts
After speaking to Hermione everything seemed to get better. I don't know what it is but just talking to her seems to make the world a brighter place. I guess that's something only certain friends can accomplish especially after they've face all kinds of evils together and lived to tell the tale. After we spoke Hermione definitely seemed better already, why I don't know but I'm not going to press the issue just yet. I'm going to give her the space she wanted but make sure she doesn't fall back into her android state. That wouldn't be good if she did.
As for the relationship side of my life I still haven't spoken to Lisa. I plan to talk to her soon though because the longer I wait the more guilty I'll feel and I just know it. Hermione was right I should go talk to her and Lisa is sweet enough to listen to what I have to say. I don't think we'll go our separate ways in the end, we'll still be friends. I'm just glad Hermione and I are talking again, that took a lot off my mind. I should be heading to bed soon because I've got a big day tomorrow. I don't know when I'll speak to Lisa but I'm going to try to do it soon. As long as I have Hermione I just know everything is going to end well.
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A/N: Well it has been awhile but there is the story for now. As you can see things are turning up for everyone in the story. I know I may have lost some readers but I hope I've kept enough loyal ones to keep this story going. So to those who have stuck with me I haven't forgotten you and I will try to update more often. Currently I'm working on a new chapter for Eternal Rhapsody so keep an eye out for that one. As for Harry Potter and the Orb of Ter'angreal I don't know when I'll get around to that one but I'm going to try to update after all it has been two years. Also a new story should be coming up from me, it's a one chapter fic but it's long. Once again thanks to my boyfriend for putting up with all my doubts and was kind enough to read through my story at 2am. He's great isn't he?...lol. But I will leave you now and I thank you in advance for all the kind reviews I will be getting!
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Created on ... December 16, 2004