Unofficial Portkey Archive

Author's Note: Thanks to all of you who checked in with reviews on the last chapter! I am so pleased to hear that many of you are still reading and enjoying this fic Without further ado, I give you Chapter 18.

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CHAPTER 18: Wounds Too Deep

The blade piercing through Draco's chest had somehow snapped him out of the curse that had been controlling him. His cloudy gaze became clear just in time for Harry to see the look of excruciating pain and horror that crossed his pale features. Harry caught him before he could fall and lowered Draco's armored body to the ground, unable to tear his gaze from the blade that was protruding from his body. Blood poured in rivers from the open wound, coating Harry's armor as he kneeled in the ash, too shocked to move.

"Not like this" Draco whispered before losing consciousness. The words cut through Harry like a hot blade and he snapped in action. Waving his hand over Draco's body he channeled his magic to immobilize the motionless body and levitate it. Then he ran for the porthole, the body trailing behind him, leaving spattered blood amongst the wreckage of a paradise turned hell. As soon as he was on the other side he grabbed Draco's wrist and apparated them to Malfoy Manor.

The scene at the Manor was one of chaos. In her infinite wisdom Hermione had the foresight to turn one of the Manor's many empty wings into a makeshift infirmary before the battle. Harry discovered this by following the panicked masses of people there. Many were injured, some were unmoving. Hermione has solicited Madame Pomfrey's assistance should anyone be injured, but it was clear that the poor mediwitch was more than overwhelmed. Covered in soot and blood her eyes widened when she saw Draco's motionless body, the massive blade still piercing through him. She motioned to a cot where Harry laid him down and she quickly drew the curtains up around him, setting to work.

To Harry, the world around him seemed to be moving impossibly fast but he felt like he was unable to move; as though he was stuck in some sort of cement that kept him grounded. Those who weren't hurt (or whose injuries were minimal) were rushing about trying to attend to the others that Madame Pomfrey had not gotten to. He saw Neville applying some sort of herbal salve to the burns that one victim had sustained. Mrs. Weasley was using her wand to mend some deep gashes on another victim as Mr. Weasley and Ron were helping a limping young girl to an empty bed. Ginny was especially busy, working in tandem with Luna to see to the worst of the victims. She must have felt Harry's gaze upon her because she looked up from her work suddenly and when she saw him she ran to him, throwing her arms around his shoulders and burying her face against his chest.

Due to the fact that he was still experiencing some form of shock, it took Harry a moment before he responded to his former girlfriend's embrace. Slowly he wrapped his arms around her, pulling her closer to him and marveling at how real the world suddenly felt to him. "Thank Merlin you're alright" Ginny said when she pulled away, tears streaking through the black soot that still stained her cheeks. "When I saw Ron holding Hermione I thought for sure you were dead."

"Hermione…" Harry said weakly, slowly coming back to himself.

"She's stabilized, Madame Pomfrey saw to her first." She gestured to a be towards the back of the room. "Have you seen Draco?"

If Harry thought it was strange that Ginny called Draco by his first name, or that she was inquiring about him at all he showed no sign. He only grew very pale, his emerald eyes becoming dark with a mixture of emotions. "I stabbed him" he said, and she stepped away from him slowly. For a brief moment she wondered if Harry had gone mad again; if Tom Riddle's soul had somehow escaped the prison Harry wore around his neck and infected him once more. But she knew Harry… and she knew Tom. This was only Harry, and there was a tremendous amount of pain in his expression.

She sees me as a monster now Harry thought to himself as Ginny's features went from confused to horrified. I am a monster. All this blood, this death and destruction… this is my legacy. This is what befalls anyone who dares follow me.

Unable to look at her expression any longer he gestured to the curtained off bed behind him and Ginny ran to find Madame Pomfrey hard at work on the cold boy who now looked like ice. Why Ginny cared so much hardly mattered. All that she knew was that she did not want Draco Malfoy to die. She half expected Madame Pomfrey to yell at her but the mediwitch said nothing as Ginny stepped forward to help. Pomfrey had already removed the blade from his chest and was now trying to heal the massive wound that marred his chest. Ginny removed her wand and helped, augmenting the power of the healing spell.

Outside of the curtain Harry stumbled into motion, heading towards the only place left in the world that felt like home, the only place that could possible heal the pain within him; Hermione. He found her asleep, blood still crusted to the side of her face, her cloak covered in soot. Sitting on the edge of her bed he was suddenly afraid to touch her; as though his touch might cause further pain and death. Finally he moved his hand slowly towards hers, allowing his fingers to glide across the back of her hand and up towards the cuff of her robe's sleeve. When he touched her arm he felt something hard underneath the robe.

"Malfoy insisted" her voice said and Harry's eyes snapped up to her face to see her cinnamon brown gaze fixated on his face. "He had a few extra suits of dragonhide armor. He insisted that Ron, Luna, Ginny and I use them. He said that if you survived you'd be a lot less likely to kill him for lying to you if we all came through it all okay."

That suit probably saved her life Harry realized, and as he thought of Draco lying just a few beds away, bleeding the last of his life away, he felt a heavy swelling of guilt in him once more. He tried to save the people I care about most in the world and I've killed him anyways… I've killed him. Those three words kept repeating in his head when it suddenly struck him. The Unbreakable Fucking Vow.

He stood suddenly, feeling like he might get sick. Hermione struggled to sit up, alarm clear in her eyes. "Harry what is it?" she asked, but he couldn't hear her. He could only hear the words of the oath, ringing in his ears like a death toll.

I, Harry James Potter, vow on my very life, that I will free Draco Malfoy from this prison, and I will not kill him afterwards.

"I've killed him" Harry croaked, and he fell to his knees then, burying his face in her lap. He felt her fingers running through his hair and could hear her voice frantically speaking to him, but he could not process any of it. He had not meant to stab Draco, but it had been by his hand that Draco Malfoy would die. He had vowed on his life that he would NEVER kill Draco. "If he dies, I die."

"HARRY JAMES POTTER, what are you talking about??" she sputtered, finally pulling him back to reality as she managed to yank his head up from her lap and look him square in the eyes. He briefly explained it to her- the idiotic wording of the vow, the imperius curse that Damon had put on Draco, the bloody results of their fight. With each word she grew paler and paler and somehow he forgot his own fear about dying and felt the need to reassure her. He tried to put his arms around her but she pushed him away. "It was a MISTAKE Harry! You're not going to die, even if he does."

He could tell she didn't believe her own words since she was crying as she said them. This time when he embraced her she did not fight it, instead clinging desperately to him as though she could hold him tight enough to prevent his soul from leaving his body. The realization that she needed him was a strong motivator and his spinning world suddenly stopped as he regained control. He laid her back in the bed and kissed her deeply. "Rest" he said firmly. "I'm going to fix this."

She didn't release his arms from her grasp just yet. She had let him walk to death's door so many times and she knew one day there would be no way to pull him back. Yet this is what they did, and she trusted him in such a way that she could not doubt his words. The words "I'll go with you" lingered on her lips but she wasn't sure where it was she was promising to follow him to. Still, she refused to let him go alone and despite his protests and the dizziness she was experiencing she stood and he put his arm around her to keep her from falling. They walked through the makeshift medical ward and after seeing the blood and wounds of so many she finally pressed her face against Harry, blinding her to it all. His armor has the irony smell of blood and she felt sick. They followed me and I led them into a trap.

When they arrived at Draco's bedside she gasped to see the gruesome wound that Pomfrey and Ginny were still trying to close. His armor and clothing had been stripped away from his chest exposing the gaping hole that Harry had accidently put there. "Unless you're going to help, both of you need to get out" Pomfrey warned, not looking up from her spell work.

"He's already helped enough" Ginny said hastily and Hermione flinched. Of course Ginny did not know the details yet of all that had happened, but could she really think Harry would try to kill Draco?

Harry wasn't sure what he was doing and he reached for the pendent that hung around his neck. Increasingly it had become a habit of his to toy with the object when he was thinking. Despite its macabre nature, something seemed to draw his hand to it unconsciously. Gripping it in his hand he had a resolute image form in his mind; an image of Draco's wound healing. Not even realizing what he was doing he stepped forward, ignoring Ginny's protests. With the orb in one hand he placed his other hand just above the wound and channelled his magic. He heard a gasp but did not look away. There was a bright light glowing from his hand and it grew more and more radiant until everyone else had to look away. The light sunk into Draco's chest, consuming the wound. When it disappeared and Harry removed his hand, the wound was gone, only a slight scar and a black smudge left.

He turned towards the ladies gathered behind him, shocked by what he had just done. Ginny was the first one his gaze met and as she looked at him she suddenly went very pale and fell to the ground in a dead faint. As she fell Harry's hand fell from the necklace and with a quick gesture he used wandless magic to catch her before she hit the floor, levitating her body upwards and looking to Hermione and Madame Pomfrey with confusion in his eyes.

"Move her to another bed" Madame Pomfrey said promptly. He did as commanded and with a quick wave of her wand Madame Pomfrey informed them she had "simply passed out."

"There's nothing wrong with her save a bit of dehydration and over excitement. She'll be just fine. I have other patients I need to attend to. What you did Mr. Potter… I've never seen… how did you…?"

"I don't know" Harry said simply. It wasn't enough to attribute it to Mental Channeling. The power he had felt flowing through him was greater than anything he had experienced.

"Well, Mr. Malfoy was lucky you did whatever it was you did" she said and then she was off to her next patient. He looked to Hermione, a question burning in his eyes but she had no answers, so she did the only thing she could think to do and took his hand in hers. She led him from the hospital wing, knowing there was nothing more they could currently do. Her head was throbbing and he looked shaky and weak. He did not question her as she wordlessly led him down the dark corridors of Malfoy Manor and into one of its massive lavatories.

Once inside she proceeded to remove his blood stained armor from him, carefully unlatching each piece as he stared off into nothingness. Once the armor was removed some life seemed to flow back into him and he began to reciprocate, helping her out of her own heavy robes and armor until eventually they were both standing in only their undergarments, looking into each others' eyes. Slowly she traced the scars on his chest with the tips of her fingers, remembering how he had healed her scar just through his touch. His scars did not vanish under her touch though and it hardly mattered. These weren't the scars she wanted to heal.

"I'm sorry" she suddenly whispered and she felt tears spring to her eyes with a painful sting. "I got all of those people hurt… I marched them into a trap… I kept secrets from you."

"Shhh" he said, pulling her into his chest and holding her tightly as her body shook with barely suppressed sobs. "We both kept secrets because we thought what we were doing was for the best. Now we've all paid the price." He tilted her chin up so she was looking into his eyes and she saw such an intensity blazing there that it stirred something within her. "Never again" he swore. "No more secrets. We will get that bastard back, and we'll do it together."

There was something in the way that he said together that made her abandon all restraint and she kissed him with a passionate hunger. He reciprocated, lifting her suddenly onto the sink top so that he was positioned between her legs, her hands gripped her hips tightly as she tangled her hands in his hair. She heard the shower go on and wasn't sure how he had managed to turn it on but didn't quite care. He fumbled to remove the small amount of clothing left between them and then lifted her again, this time into the shower.

As the hot water poured down their bodies it washed away the grime that covered them and they continued to kiss as their hands explored every part of each other that they had never explored before. He moved his hands through her hair and she vaguely noticed that the pain she had felt from her concussion was gone.

Soaking wet they moved from the shower to an adjoining room, still not breaking contact as they hit the soft mattress. As he moved on top of her he did not ask for permission; he didn't need to. He had always been able to tell what she was thinking when it really mattered.

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Ginny Weasley awoke with a start. She remembered where she was, all that had happened and then finally, the last thing she had seen before she had lost consciousness. A cold fear went through her body. Aside from the dim bedside lanterns the hall was quite dark now and it was also much quieter. Feeling her wand still secured in its holster she felt somewhat safer and she rose to her feet, not sure where they were leading her. It was only a moment before she found herself at Draco Malfoy's bedside.

He looked even paler and colder than ever, which was not a surprise given all the blood he lost she mused, and she absently pulled the blankets up around his shoulders. "Weasley?" he asked, his voice thick with confusion.

"I'm just checking in on the patients" she lied, suddenly embarrassed at being caught watching him sleep.

"I'm not dead?" he asked confused.

"How much do you remember?"

"Damon used a really strong imperius on me and I attacked Potter with a sword. I tried to fight it but I couldn't… we struggled and he stabbed me. Well, it was an accident really but still… Saint Potter stabbed me!"

"He also saved you" Ginny said, her voice kind.

"He did?" Draco blinked, his strange silver eyes looking at her with much confusion. In the dim lighting, and tucked under the blankets he looked like a lost little boy. "Why would he… ah of course, the Unbreakable Fucking Vow."

She didn't bother to press him on what he meant by this because it didn't really matter. Only one thing mattered right now and the thing had cause her to faint. The image was seared into her mind and she shuddered. "After he healed you, he turned to face us. I may have been the only one to see it because I was standing closest, but his eyes…"

"One of them was a different color?" Draco asked and she looked at him with shock. "On the battlefield, when he saw Granger get hurt, he let out this incredible burst of energy. It knocked both me and Damon to the ground. As I was falling, I saw his eyes, but only for a split second. One was the usual green and the other was…."

"Black" Ginny finished. "I know those eyes. They haunt my nightmares every night."

"Tom Riddle" Draco said, suddenly recalling everything Lucius had put young Ginny Weasley through thanks for Riddle's diary. She shuddered once more and suddenly sat on the foot of his bed, wrapping her arms around her knees.

"How do you know what Riddle's eyes looked like?" Ginny asked in a soft tone.

"I see him sometimes, in my dreams… er, Greyback's dreams."

"Oh, of course" she said shortly. There was an unbearable silence for a long beat. "What do you think it means?"

"Well, we always doubted Riddle's intentions when we helped Potter transport his soul into that terrible trinket. Seems like he's still got some power over The Boy Who Lived."

"Will he ever be rid of that maniac?"

"I don't know" Draco mused. "There's a lot I still don't know." He looked away, gazing into the flame dancing in his bedside lantern. "I made a huge mistake. We walked into Damon's trap. Is Granger…"

"She's fine" Ginny said. "There were some injuries and a few… casualties. It could have been worse though. We were able to retreat."

"Damon fled" Draco said, his voice sounding small and far away. "He and his Children ran away from the battle and tried to leave me to deal with Potter."

"Why?" Ginny asked, exasperated. "They had us-- we were no match for their power and numbers."

"We had something they didn't, something Damon feared." Draco said, suddenly remembering the look in Damon's eyes when he saw Harry's eyes change. "We had Tom Riddle."

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The light of dawn crept through the dark drapes, spilling across their unclothed bodies and slowly rousing Hermione from a deep sleep. Her head was rested on Harry's chest and she could hear his heart beating steadily beneath her ear. What a miracle that his heart still beats she thought, her brain foggy as her dream world vanished and reality pressed in on her. There was much damage to deal with and she wasn't quite ready to face it. She wished she could stay in his arms, where she felt safe, where she had always felt safe.

Together. His words form the night before rang in her ears and she remembered his vow that this time there would be no secrets; they would face their enemies together. This gave her some renewed strength and she roused herself from the warmth of his embrace, taking just a moment to watch him sleep. He hadn't slept much in weeks and she felt guilty waking him. She traced the dark stubble on his jawline and trailed down the side of his neck, causing him to shift slightly in his sleep. He's still ticklish she realized with a slight smile. It was a bittersweet realization; it made him seem impossibly young to have seen all he'd seen.

She looked at the scars on his chest once more and noticed a dark smudge that had not come off in the shower. She tried to rub it off but it would not budge. Peculiar she thought, suddenly committed to trying to clean it. He woke before she could get more aggressive, blinking slowly as though he wasn't sure where he was. She was half laying on him, both still undressed and leaving the bed seemed like an impossible proposition given the circumstances. The previous night had been filled with passion and the aggression of years of built up emotions. This time as she kissed him it was soft and he reciprocated with a tender gentleness.

Though their second round of lovemaking was very different from the first time it seemed equally profound. When they were finished she stood quickly, knowing that if she lingered for a moment longer they may very well never leave that bed. As she dressed he watched her, vaguely wondering how he had gotten so lucky; how she had ever fallen in love with him of all people. Not the Boy Who Lived, or He Who Defeated the Dark Lord, but just plain old Harry Potter. The boy who had come into the Hogwarts Express with broken glasses, baggy hand-me-down clothes and not a friend in the world. After he realized how brilliant she was (and even at age 11 it hadn't taken him long), he marveled at the fact that she had chosen him as a friend and that she had stuck by him even when things got messy. And when it came to him, things always got messy.

Now that they were lovers, now that he knew she was in love with him; it was a whole other sort of sensation. He had been with other women but he had never felt the way he did when he was with her. He hadn't even known it was possible.

Finally rousing himself from the bed he also dressed and they did their rounds through Malfoy Manor, checking up on the wounded and checking in with their closest friends. They were surprised to find Draco Malfoy's bed empty and Madame Pomfrey informed them that Mr. Malfoy was sufficiently recovered. They found Ron and Luna in the kitchen where Mrs. Weasley was fixing a proper breakfast for her family along with numerous others. In fact, the only ones not gathered in the massive Malfoy Manor kitchen were the injured, Draco and Ginny.

It was a tense moment when they entered the kitchen. This was the first time facing their "soldiers" since the failed attack, and Hermione's guilt welled up once more. Harry's hand found hers, as it always did, and they stood tall before those who had followed them into battle. She was relieved when Harry did the talking. As a boy he never saw himself as a leader, but she had always known that it was in him. Luckily, as a man, he had embraced the role as best as he could.

"We were outwitted yesterday" he said simply, as everyone grew quiet, their eyes fixed on Harry. "Damon was two steps ahead of us and it costed us in both lives and blood. It's a price that I know every one of you was willing to pay, and I thank you for that."

"You don't have to-" Neville Longbottom started, but Harry held up a hand to silence him.

"I do have to thank you. The whole wizarding world will owe you their thanks when this is finally finished, but until that point, the only thanks I can offer is my own." He gazed around the room, looking upon the faces of his allies and friends. He saw the Weasleys; the closest thing he'd ever known to a real family. He saw Luna Lovegood, whose dreamy expression was now gone and replaced by a look of intense loyalty. Several of his most trusted friends from the Auror department were there as well, each one looking on with great respect for their leader. All of this trust led him to think about those faces that were missing; Dumbledore, Sirius, Remus, Tonks, Fred… the list was too long. Inevitably, some of those who looked upon him now would also die but that was something he would have to try not to fixate on at this moment. They needed him to be strong.

"Mistakes were made in our attempt to eliminate Damon. It isn't going to happen again. We will all keep training and together we will all get stronger and better. The next time you are asked to put your life at risk, it will be with a full attack plan behind us. This is a different sort of war than the one we fought against Voldemort. We know far less about this enemy and his time to prepare for such a fight has far exceeded anything in recorded history. But perhaps most difficult is the fact that we don't know who our friends or enemies are. Anyone could secretly be supporting him, and that means every risk you take, every sacrifice you make, must be done in secret. It is possible that when this all ends, nobody will ever know what we've done to make the wizarding world a safer place. At least, nobody except the people in this room today. We are all each other has and if we stick together I think- no, I know- that we will stop this menace."

There were grim nods of agreement from around the room, but most importantly a look of determination in their eyes. Some of them were angry now; angry at Damon for friends lost and blood spilled. Good he thought. Channel that anger. We will bring it all crashing down on Damon's head.

He nodded to Ron and Luna, a gesture that they instantly knew to mean that he wanted a private word with them. The others would be heading back to their respective jobs soon, each pretending as though nothing had happened. Those who had died would be filed as "missing" and any loved ones who did not know about their heroics would be lead to a tormented search for a body they wouldn't find for some time. It was all more than grim; it was nearly unconscionable. Yet it had to be done.

He took a deep breath and headed for the library, Hermione's hand still in his. When they arrived, they discovered Draco and Ginny sitting by the fire, each quietly reading a book. It was a rather domestic scene, and quite puzzling.

"Bloody hell Ginny, what are you doing in here with HIM?" Ron asked as soon as he spotted the two of them. Harry quietly closed the door and cast a silencing charm. He did not need any personal drama being overheard by those who were supposed to be placing their trust in the "Golden Trio" et al. "Mum was worried sick when you weren't in your hospital bed and meanwhile you're in here with… with HIM… READING?"

He said "reading" like it was a dirty word and Harry nearly laughed in spite of himself. Draco did in fact smirk, which only fueled Ron further and once more Harry had to put himself between the two. "Well Weasley, when it comes to women you may have heard that I am very well known for my skills in reading." This time Harry was barely able to stop Ron and it was Ginny who intervened, pointing a finger at her older brother and using a wandless hex to knock Ron back a few paces.

"Impressive" Harry muttered before he could stop himself. Ginny gave him an appreciative smile and then re-focused her energy on her brother, her eyes narrowing with that famous look of Weasley rage.

"Ronald, I am entitled to read with whomever I choose. I'm an adult now in case you haven't noticed. So save your attitude for someone who has the time. We're trying to figure out what's wrong with Harry."

"What's wrong with me?" Harry asked, puzzled. "I wasn't aware anything was wrong with me. Malfoy is the one who got stabbed through the chest yesterday, and you fainted. If anyone should be worried about anyone it's the two of you."

"Yes indeed" Ron growled. "I for one am very worried about what the two of you were doing in here alone." Harry gestured for Ron to shut up and for once he did as he was bid, simply dropping into a nearby armchair and crossing his arms across his chest, a scowl dominating his features.

"Harry I fainted because…" Ginny started tenuously and then looked to Hermione, a shade of concern in her light brown eyes. "I fainted because of what I saw in your eyes. Or, in your eye to be specific. I will never forget that gaze. It belonged to Tom Riddle.

"That's not possible" Harry blustered, hoping his adamant refusal of the truth would protect himself and everyone around him from it. "We removed his soul…"

"Using a spell he himself suggested" Draco noted. "I saw it as well, on the battlefield."

Harry's hand automatically moved to the pendant around his neck and Hermione's reaction was instant. "We need to get rid of that necklace" she said. "It can't be any good for you to be carrying it around…"

"No!" Harry and Draco said simultaneously, giving each other an odd look. Draco continued. "The only reason Damon fled during the battle yesterday is because of that pendant. It's connecting Potter to Riddle still, and when Damon saw that I could tell he was afraid."

"Malfoy is right" Harry said slowly. "Damon is afraid of only one thing; Tom Riddle. Riddle burned down The Cradle when he was barely out of Hogwarts. He always had great powers but he was never able to control them; his rage always got in the way. But now that I have a part of him, maybe I can control it…"

"Riddle has been enhancing your powers" Hermione realized. "From the very beginning; the uncontrollable wandless magic… it was all because of Riddle. It makes sense. Mental Channeling is powered by one's consciousness and you had two souls dwelling within you… you are twice as powerful."

"That's why you've been experiencing wandless magic too Malfoy" Harry realized, blinking hard. "You have Fenrir Greyback's consciousness… or at least a part of it, within you. It's a blessing in disguise really."

"How do you figure?" Hermione asked, baffled. "You thought you were finally done with Riddle, that you were free of him, but it's clear that this was some part of his plan all along."

"I don't know about that" Harry shrugged. "All I know is that right now he's making me more powerful and that is what saved us all yesterday."

"There is such a thing as too much power Harry" she admonished, her eyes looking wary of what he had just said to her. "You of all people should know how fully power can corrupt. Remember the Elder Wand?"

"Of course I remember" he responded hastily. "But what other choice do we have? If I can control Riddle…"

"And what if he controls YOU instead? He was very close last time. This matter of magic and the soul are his forte, not ours. Don't you think it's possible that you're just falling into another one of his traps?"

"Do we have any other choice?" he asked her sharply, and suddenly all the others in the room had the distinct impression that they had become audience to an awkward lovers' quarrel.

"You don't even know how you did it those other times! You can't possibly control it…"

"I'll figure it out" he said gruffly. He was thinking about all those expecting faces he had just spoken too, and while he saw the logic in her words he couldn't be bothered to be stopped by them. They needed a hero, and if that meant using Riddle to supplement his power he would damned well figure it out. He could tell she didn't believe him and he felt suddenly stung by her distrust in him. "I'll figure it out, with or without you all."

He turned quickly, exiting the library and leaving the rest of them in the wake of his sudden hostile mood. So much for the whole "together" speech she thought angrily. She very nearly followed him out of the room, but it was Luna who stopped her with a gentle gesture. "He probably just has some snarling vorax in his head right now."

Hermione didn't know what a snarling vorax was (well, she did know it was not a real thing), but somehow she knew Luna was right. Harry had a lot of weight on his shoulders and a walk would clear his mind. She just hoped she could convince him not to involve Riddle. It could not lead to anything good.

"Well" Draco said after a beat, calling all of their attention back to the awkward dynamic of the room. "Ginny and I were trying to determine how Riddle could possibly be effecting Potter at this point in time if you'd like to join us on our likely useless research quest."

Ginny noticed immediately that Draco had called her by her first name instead of the usual "Weasley" and she blushed for some reason. Ron seemed to notice too and the tips of his ears burned red but he refrained from a juvenile reaction, instead bringing up a rather wise point. "The horocruxes were able to affect us, even just when I had that damned thing around my neck I could feel its darkness dragging me down."

"When I was exposed to Riddle's diary it basically possessed me" Ginny agreed. "Could the pendant be doing something similar to Harry?"

"It would make sense" Hermione conceded. "This is more than just a sliver of his soul too… it's the whole thing trapped in that little orb. Maybe that's what Riddle was hoping for when he suggested the process of removing himself from Harry's mind. He knew that Harry had learned to control him in there, but outside of him… outside of Harry's body, he may gain some influence, just like the horocruxes did."

"We need to get that thing away from him" Ginny said with a shudder.

"No, we don't" Draco said, slamming the book in front of him closed loudly. "As we both said before, it's the only real weapon we have against Damon right now. Truth be told, I wouldn't be surprised if the old lunatic goes into hiding until Potter dies rather than face a Riddle/ Potter hybrid."

"What a ridiculous thing to call it" Ginny scoffed, but Draco ignored her.

"Riddle may still be trying to use Potter, but Potter is going to need to use Riddle right back. It's the only way we'll end this thing."

"You'd like that wouldn't you Malfoy?" Ron barked, cutting in before Hermione could. "Harry's mental stability has already been on the rocks for ages now, and you would like us to push it further and take this sort of risk? I know Harry means nothing to you but he's my best mate. Your opinion counts for nothing."

Draco was surprised by how the words stung. Of course Potter had meant nothing to him before. But now? Now there was something almost akin to friendship. Or so he thought. It was a feeling he had never really known before. He had come to gain some respect for Potter and he thought that maybe Potter had some respect for him as well. And they had been through things together now. He had stood at Potter's side when they faced Damon, and had been prepared to die fighting alongside him. Did that count for nothing?

He brushed his feelings aside, annoyed by the turmoil they caused within him and simply glared at Ron. "You're right Weasley, I don't care about what happens to Potter because I'm a little more concerned about what will happen to the rest of the bloody world if we have nothing to use against Damon. Dumbledore used Potter as his sacrificial lamb for years, why shouldn't we do the same now?"

The words had barely finished leaving his mouth before he was slapped so far that he felt the world flash around him. He reeled for a moment before realizing who had hit him; she had moved so quickly he barely perceived it. Damn, I forgot how hard Granger can hit.

"Uncalled for" he said, trying to keep his tone flat and unaffected. Clearly he was the only one who did think it was uncalled for though, because soon they were all leaving the room, Ginny and Hermione half dragging Ron out as he spat a bunch of indiscernible curses in Draco's direction. To his surprise, only Luna Lovegood remained.

"You need to stop pushing everyone away Draco Malfoy" she said sadly once they were alone in the vast library.

"What would you know about it Loony Lovegood?" he said, feeling the venom of his youth well up in him like an uncontrollable bile. Push it away he urged himself. Control it. He couldn't quite manage it though. He was feeling things he had not allowed himself to feel in a long time and it was breaking everything down that he had worked so hard for. It made him feel vulnerable and he hated that feeling, he despised it with every part of him.

Luna was not phased by his hostility however, and she continued on with what she had been saying before his rude outburst. "You think that nobody can see your sadness, but I can. I know what it's like to be an outsider."

"I'm from one of THE most prestigious families in wizarding history, I was an exceptional student at Hogwarts, and I was the Slytherin seeker; I have never been an outsider like you."

"No, not exactly like me, that's true. You never had friends who loved you; I did. You never had a cause you felt a part of; I did. People laughed at me but they despised you. You are more than an outsider than I've ever been."

"I don't need your pity" he snapped.

"I don't pity you Draco. I am just offering you some friendly advice. Believe it or not, you do have some friends."

`'''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''

Hermione found Harry sitting in the overgrown garden of Malfoy Manor. This was the exact place where I finally accepted my true feelings for him she realized as she sat beside him on the marble bench where he was brooding. He didn't make any move to get away from her, and she was glad for that.

"I'm sorry" they said at the same time and they both laughed a little, the tension dissolving from the air around them. He put his arm around her and she leaned against him, feeling at home in his embrace.

"I acted like a jerk in there" he started after a peaceful moment passed. "I don't know why I got that way…"

"It's this" she said, gesturing to the pendant hanging around his neck. He self-consciously stuffed it down the front of his shirt, hiding it from sight. "Just like the horocruxes; it has a bad effect on you. But I'm afraid this might be even worse. Your life and his have been so closely entangled for so long."

"I can't get rid of it" he said softly.

"I know" she conceded, biting her lip in a worried manner. "It's not that I don't trust you to control this Harry, it's just that I'm scared. I'm scared of what it might do to you."

"As am I" he admitted. "I don't deserve you. I never have."

"Don't say that" she admonished with an internal sigh of exasperation. The Dursleys had certainly done a number on him when it came to his ability to accept the love of others. She felt that she might spend her entire life trying to convince him that he was worth it-- all of it. At least if I do spend my whole life trying to convince him, that will mean we both get to live a full life.

"You deserve far more than you've ever allowed yourself to accept." She could see in his eyes that he didn't believe her but he didn't try to argue further so she allowed herself to accept his silence for the time being. His arm still around his shoulder, she pressed against his chest she could hear the steady beating of his heart and it settled her anxiety. And then suddenly, he took in a sharp breath.

"What's wrong?" she asked, moving away from him to see that his face had gone entirely pale. He grabbed at his chest, rubbing it as though something there pained him. "Is it the pendant?" She scrambled to see what was causing him pain, kneeling in front of him as she lifted his shirt to expose his bare chest. And what she saw there knocked the wind out her. What had just been a stubborn black smudge that morning was now a dark black stain beneath his skin, a blotch the size of his fist. And it was growing.

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