Author's note: Thanks for all the reviews! I am so glad you guys are reading this and am glad to hear what you think. I hope that you all still like me…this chapter isn't so bad..it's the next couple that you should worry about…just a little warning. Please forgive me….
Chapter 16
Fallen
"Truth be told I've tried my best
But somewhere along the way
I got caught up in all there was to offer
And the cost was so much more than I could bear
Though I've tried, I've fallen...
I have sunk so low
I have messed up
Better I should know
So don't come round here
And tell me I told you so..."
(Sarah McLachlan, "Fallen")
Ginny spent the next couple of weeks busily making plans. She didn't have much time. It was only a matter of time before she would start to show. She was nearly two months along as it was. If she was going to act on her plan, she had to do it now and do it quickly.
This was all turning out to be quite tricky. So many things could go terribly wrong. She couldn't afford to make any mistakes. Everything had to be planned just right. All her i's had to be dotted and her t's crossed. If even one thing went wrong, everything would fall apart.
Complicating matters even further was her nagging conscience. She wasn't fooling herself. She knew that what she was about to do was wrong. She knew that her actions would change not only her life, but the lives of her family, and most notably, Harry and Hermione.
She tried to shake these feelings off by reminding herself that this was truly her only options. What was it that they always said? Desperate times call for desperate measures? Well, this was one of those times, Ginny would tell herself over and over again to bolster her when she had doubts. She had to think of what was best not only for her, but for her baby. There was no doubt in her mind that Harry was the answer; the only option.
Ginny could just picture herself with Harry, raising her child as theirs. They would build a happy, safe and loving home together. While it was true that she didn't love Harry as she'd loved Draco, but Draco had made himself quite clear. He wasn't going to be there for her and the baby. But, Ginny knew that if Harry thought he was the father of this baby, he'd stand by her side without fail. He was the type of person who took responsibility for his actions. He was the type of person who stood by you when you needed him most. He was the answer. He was someone her parents would gladly accept. He was everything that Draco Malfoy wasn't.
There was one pressing problem at the moment, however. Harry Potter wasn't hers and never had been. He was Hermione's.
Ginny could still remember those summer nights at The Burrow. Hermione would always room with Ginny when she visited. They'd stay up chatting about everything under the sun.
Ginny could always tell that Hermione's feelings for Harry ran much deeper than friendship. There were hints all along. There was the way Hermione's eyes lit up when his name was mentioned. There was the way that she smiled when he walked into the room. There was the way she stayed up nights, worried sick about him. Even when Ginny had her crush on Harry, she'd known that deep down there was never a chance that he'd see her as anything but a little sister. Ginny could always see the close bond that Harry and Hermione had. Ginny recognized quite early that no one would ever be to Harry what Hermione was and vice versa.
Ginny couldn't help feeling envious at what Harry and Hermione had found in each other. They had a deep, abiding love based on and strengthened by their friendship. They had their ups and downs like everyone else, but when it really counted and when it really mattered, they always knew they could depend on each other. When one was weak, the other was strong. They looked to each other for comfort, for strength and for warmth.
A few weeks ago when she and Hermione ran into each other in the library, Ginny had inquired about Harry and Hermione's relationship was going. Ginny could still see the glow in Hermione's eyes as she said that she'd never felt as happy and loved as she did with Harry. She'd said that Harry was like coming home, but not to any home she'd ever known before. Hermione's cheeks had flushed red as she'd said this.
"I know it sounds crazy, and maybe it is, but I just can't explain it," Hermione had said. "To me, he is home."
Ginny had nodded and told her friend how happy she was for her.
What a hypocrite, I am.
Watching the two of them as she had, Ginny knew what real love could be. She'd been so foolish and naïve to think that she'd found that with Draco Malfoy, of all people. She should have known. Hindsight being 20/20, she now knew that their entire relationship had been one huge lie; one huge deception. Now, she was paying for her mistake---her tactical error in judgment---in the worst way, while Malfoy went along carefree and unburdened. It wasn't fair; it wasn't right.
It would be a lie if Ginny hadn't thought about the sheer poetic justice of passing this baby off as Harry's. It would be a well-deserved slap in the face to Malfoy. He'd never made a secret of his animosity of Harry and all things Potter. This was her way of getting back at him the only way she knew how. She wanted him to hurt as he had hurt her. What better way of getting back at him than with his archrival; his nemesis.
Ginny had planned it all out quite carefully. Next weekend would be a Hogsmeade weekend. She had heard the Gryffindor boys talking about going to The Hog's Head. She had to make sure that Harry got drunk. She didn't figure it would take much to get the job done as he wasn't much of a drinker. Come to think of it, Ginny couldn't recall ever seeing him drink anything more potent than butterbeer.
She knew that Harry would never be unfaithful to Hermione. He wasn't the type to betray someone, especially the one person he loved most in the world. In order for Ginny's plan to work, she had to do two things. One was to make sure that his inhibitions were loosened and the best way to do this was with alcohol. She didn't need him to be of a clear mind and body. She needed him to be a little out of control.
The other more important thing involved polyjuice potion. She would have to turn into Hermione. In his inebriated state, he wouldn't question her arrival in his quarters. She knew that if he saw her as Hermione, his normal, male hormonal instincts would kick in. And then Ginny would be home free.
The glitch in her plans had been the fact that polyjuice potion wasn't something you could just whip up in a matter of seconds. It was a complicated potion that took a month to make. Ginny didn't have a month to spare. She'd been at the end of her rope when she'd remembered hearing about a Ravenclaw boy named Sean Brandon. Word around the castle was that he kept potions in his room. He sold them to students for the right price. She'd cornered him on the grounds one day and inquired if he'd had any polyjuice potion. He'd sold her some without question. As he had done so, he'd cautioned her again that she needed to make sure she had a bit of who she wanted to change into.
On a cold snowy Thursday evening, Ginny made her way to Harry & Hermione's Head Boy/Head Girl suite. She'd decided to tell Harry she needed to borrow a book from Hermione's room. While she was in there, she planned to nick some of Hermione's hair from a hairbrush.
She quietly made her way to their suite and pressed on the button on the wall that signaled her arrival. She couldn't just walk in as she had no idea what Harry and Hermione's password was.
Within seconds, Harry appeared at the entrance. He was still in his school uniform, but his shirt was tucked out and his tie loosened.
"Ginny," Harry said, with a warm smile. "This is a surprise."
"Hi," Ginny said, smiling back at him. "I hope I'm not disturbing you. There's a book of Hermione's I was hoping to borrow. If you, um, don't mind, I was wondering if I could get it."
Harry nodded. "I think she took most of her books with her when she left for home, but you're welcome to take a look in her room."
He stood back to allow her to come inside. As she did so, she smiled somewhat nervously at Harry. Harry closed the door behind her and then led her into the common room of the suite.
Ginny nearly jumped out of her skin when she saw her brother sitting on the sofas. As she stepped closer, she saw a pile of books and parchment paper on the floor. They'd obviously been studying. Yet, the sight of her brother here made her quite nervous and she blurted out without thinking, "What on earth are you doing here, Ron?"
"Playing Quidditch," Ron said sarcastically. "What does it look like I'm doing?"
"Don't mind him, Ginny," Harry said, breezing past her and resuming his seat on the sofa. "You know how his warm, charming personality comes out when he's studying."
"Yeah, well don't mind Harry, either," Ron retorted. "He's in the middle of his pity party."
"What are you talking about?" Ginny asked.
"Harry misses Hermione so much," Ron said. He affected his voice to make it sound like baby talk. She's only been gone a fortnight. You'd think she'd dropped off the face of the earth to hear him talk."
"Shut up, Ron!" Harry said, heaving a pillow in his friend's direction. It landed hard on Ron's face.
Ginny stifled a laugh.
"So, have you heard from Hermione?" she asked, conversationally.
"She wrote a couple of days ago," Harry said. "Her dad's doing better, but she says he has a long way to go."
"When's she coming back?" Ginny asked, probing.
Harry's smile faded. "She doesn't know."
"She'll be back before you know it, Harry," Ginny chimed in.
"Well, it's actually like she never left, to tell the truth," Ron said, trying to lighten the mood. "He's turning into Hermione before our very eyes." He pointed at Harry.
"He's been on me all morning about how we needed to study tonight for McGonagall's exam and for Snape's class, too. He said we needed to keep on track. I'm telling you, Gin, all he's missing is the trademark Granger eye roll and a well placed, 'Ron, honestly!', and the transformation will be complete."
"Ha, ha, ha," Harry said, glaring at his friend.
Ginny joined in the laughter with her brother, but Harry suddenly looked at his watch.
"Damn, I forgot about my meeting with Dumbledore," Harry said, quickly getting to his feet. "He needed to talk to me about something and if I don't get a move on, I'll be late. You guys stay here, though. I should be right back."
Ron nodded and called after Harry before he reached the door, "See you in a few minutes, then, Hermione."
Without missing a beat, Harry retorted, "Sure thing, Miss Lovegood," before walking out of the suite.
Ron resumed his reading and Ginny looked at her brother, a glassy expression on her face. Feeling her eyes on him, Ron looked up at his sister.
"You okay, Gin?" he asked concerned.
Ginny focused quickly on her brother. "Yeah, of course, why shouldn't I be?"
Ron shrugged.
"I just stopped by to see if I could borrow a book from Hermione's room," Ginny said. "Harry said I could."
Ron looked up at her again, a bemused expression on his face.
"Oooookay," he said.
"I'll just go and get it then, shall I?" Ginny said, making a hasty retreat for Hermione's room, all the while under the watchful, concerned eyes of her older brother.
Ginny closed the door softly behind her and her eyes went straightaway to Hermione's dressing table. Sure enough, there was a hairbrush. She walked hurriedly over to the table and pulled out a few strands of hair from it. She pulled a plastic bag from her jeans pocket and quickly deposited the hair inside. She stuffed the bag back inside her pocket. As she did so, her eyes fell on one of the photographs on Hermione's mirror.
It was quite a good picture, actually, Ginny said, picking it up and holding it in her hand. She remembered the day that photo had been taken. It was a few short weeks ago when the weather had been unseasonably warm. After afternoon classes, most of the students made for the grounds to enjoy the day outside. A majority of the Gryffindors had found a spot down by the lake and was holding an impromptu picnic. Colin Creevey, with his ever present camera, had been taking candid photos of everyone. When he happened upon Harry and Hermione, Hermione dissolved into gales of laughter as Harry lifted her up and started to twirl her around.
As Ginny looked at the photo, the photographic Harry and Hermione were smiling and laughing and playfully hitting each
other. They looked so happy and oblivious to everything going on around them.
As Ginny put the photo back on the mirror, she felt another sharp pang of guilt. She didn't have time to think on it as Ron's voice broke into her thoughts.
"What are you doing, Gin?"
Startled, she turned around to see her brother's nonplussed expression. His arms were folded across his chest and he looked suspiciously at his sister.
"Um, looking for a book," she said. She quickly picked up a book from the dressing table and held it up for Ron to see. She chose to ignore the skeptical look on his face.
"Well," she continued. "I've got it now."
She hugged the book protectively to her chest. "I better get back to the dorms. Loads of studying to do."
"Uh-huh," Ron said, following his sister out of Hermione's bedroom.
She didn't even say goodbye as she made her way out of the suite.
Ron stood alone, for a few moments, wondering what the hell was going on with his sister. He had always been closest with Ginny out of all his siblings. He knew her moods and her actions as well as he knew his own. Seeing her tonight, he knew that something was up with her. Something was definitely wrong. The only question was what?