Author's note:
You guys know that I wouldn't leave a cliffhanger like the earlier one and not post soon after, did you? I'm cruel, but I'm not that bad! This one was difficult to write. I hope that you tell me what you think, as I know you will. A couple of lines that are spoken later in the chapter come directly from the movie version of "Circle of Friends".
Chapter 21
Unbreakable Heart
"In my blue world you shone like heaven's fire
And left me cryin' in the dark
How could anyone be so hard?
Did you think I had an unbreakable heart?
I suppose I should know
Sometimes love just comes and goes
But I believed, foolish me
We'd go on and on…"
(Unbreakable Heart by Jessica Andrews)
Hermione couldn't imagine what was keeping Harry. She'd left him over an hour ago at the foot of the stairs with Ginny.
Then, she remembered that Ginny wanted to speak to him about Quidditch. As she knew Harry, she knew that once he got started talking about the game, he was hard to stop. She couldn't count the number of times she'd sat at the Burrow or in the common room listening to Harry and Ron drone on about the latest moves and plays and brooms. Hermione would usually zone out or fall fast asleep.
She was getting hungry though as she waited for him to return. To take her mind off her growling stomach, she decided to read through one of the books she and Harry had checked out earlier in the library. It was a book about magical historical sites in the Caribbean. Just looking at the pictures in the book excited her. Warm, tropical breezes and air would be a welcome respite from the cold winter of England. She could hardly wait.
While she'd told Harry her parents wouldn't mind her going on a year-round trip around the world with her boyfriend, now that she thought about it, she wasn't exactly sure about that. She wasn't so much worried about her mum's reaction as her dad's. He'd always been a little over-protective of his daughter. She could still hear his reaction in her head when she'd asked him the summer after her fourth year if she could travel to Bulgaria to visit Viktor Krum. He'd emphatically shot that idea to pieces.
Hermione just resolved herself to the fact that she'd have to present her case to her parents logically and reasonably, not to mention quite carefully. She was about 99.6 percent sure that they'd come around to her way of thinking.
More than likely…possibly…eventually.
Her parents' trusting her was one thing. Her trusting herself was quite another. She wasn't fooling herself. She knew that if she and Harry went on this trip, they'd be spending time along together in some of the most romantic, exotic locations in the world.
Hermione couldn't shake the feeling that her resolve to hold out until her wedding night would be supremely tested and would more-than-likely fall by the wayside. The most important thing to her was to not take that step until she was ready---until they were both ready. It meant so much to her that Harry understood her position on this and that he respected her decision. If it was even possible, it endeared him to her even more.
She'd been so lost in her thoughts that she hadn't heard Harry enter the room. It startled her when she looked up to see him staring at her.
"Harry?" she asked, a tinge of worry in her voice. She placed her book on the floor and looked back at him. He looked awful. His eyes were red and bloodshot and his skin was pale and ashen. He looked shell-shocked, for lack of a better description.
"Harry?" she repeated, getting up from the couch and walking over to him. "What is it?"
He focused his eyes on her, but didn't speak.
"What is it, love?" she pressed, putting a hand on his shoulder. "Is everything okay?"
Again, he was silent.
"Let's go and sit down," she suggested. She took his hand and led him back to the sofa.
"Come on, Harry," she said softly. "You're scaring me. What's wrong? Maybe I can help."
"I don't know where to begin," he said, his voice trembling. He ran a hand nervously through his hair.
"Did something happen?" she asked worriedly. "Is it something with Dumbledore? Oh, Lord. It's not my father, is it?"
He shook his head. "No, Hermione, it's not your dad. As far as I know, you're dad is okay."
Hermione relaxed a little, but one look at the lost little boy look on Harry's face and she felt a sense of unease come over her yet again.
He suddenly grabbed hold of her hands. "You have to know something."
She nodded helpfully.
"I want you to know that I love you. I love you so much and have for so long that I can't even remember a time when I wasn't," he said, his voice full of emotion. "You are the only girl that I've ever loved. I can't see myself with anyone, but you."
"Harry," Hermione said, touched.
"I don't think I can do this," he said, releasing her hands and getting up from the sofa. He couldn't stand her looking at him like that. He would never be able to tell her this if she was looking at him like that.
"You can tell me anything, Harry," she said quietly. "You should know that by now."
"I do," he said, still with his back to her.
"Did something happen with Ginny?" she asked, racking her brain for a cause for this change in his demeanor.
Harry tensed.
"Nothing happened with her parents? One of her brothers?" she asked, a sinking feeling coming to her.
Harry turned to face her and as he did so, his heart broke at the look on her face. He took a deep breath.
"Ginny's pregnant," he said simply.
"Oh, God," Hermione said, cupping her hand over her mouth, letting the news sink in. "Poor Ginny. Was she very upset?"
"She's beside herself with worry," Harry said, feeling nauseous.
"It just seems so hard to believe," Hermione said thoughtfully. "I mean, she hasn't even been dating anyone. It would explain a lot, especially about her behavior lately. Still, she's the last person in the world I would have expected-"
Harry nodded dumbly.
"Do you know who the boy is?" Hermione asked. "She and Dean have been broken up for months now."
"It's not Dean," Harry said, feeling as if his legs were made of jelly as he struggled to stay standing. He grabbed hold of the back of an armchair for support.
"Well, if it's not Dean, then who?" Hermione asked.
"The, um, the baby's mine," Harry said quickly. "She's having my child, Hermione."
Hermione thought she hadn't heard him right. She felt suddenly as if someone had just kicked her in the stomach.
"No," Hermione said, shaking her head. She gave out a laugh. "That's not possible. You've…I mean…she's… No…"
"I'm so sorry, Hermione," Harry said. "It was all a mistake. I didn't mean for this to happen. You have to understand that."
He quickly bridged the distance between them and sat down again beside her on the couch. He extended his arm to her, but she shrugged it away.
"You didn't mean for this to happen?" she asked. "W-when did this happen?"
"While you were home with your parents," he said quietly. "It, um, it was a Hogsmeade weekend. Dean, Ron and the other blokes went down to The Hog's Head and we got so pissed, Hermione. Ron brought me back to my room and I think I passed out and I don't remember anything after that until I woke up the next morning in my bed with Ginny."
"Oh, God," Hermione said, her eyes glassy and her skin losing all shade of color. She didn't think she'd be able to move let alone string a coherent thought together. This couldn't be happening. "Oh, God."
"I'm so fucking sorry, Hermione," he said. "I didn't mean for this to happen."
"That makes it okay, then?" Hermione said, looking at him properly. "That makes it okay, then? You didn't mean for this to happen so it makes it alright?"
"No," Harry said weakly. "Of course it doesn't. I just-"
"You just what? You don't want me to feel bad? You want us to still be friends?" Hermione asked, her voice rising with every word. She was over the shock now, she was angry.
"Hermione, I love you," he said, tears falling down his face. "I love you. I don't love her."
She gave a laugh. "You love me? I wouldn't sleep with you so you jump into bed with someone who would? You said that you understood how I felt about that. You said that you would wait. You lied to me!"
"Hermione," he said, making a move to comfort her, but she pulled away from him as if he were a stranger.
"Don't touch me," she said coolly. "Please just leave me alone, Harry. Just leave me alone."
With shaking legs, she managed to rise to her feet and with one last look at him, she ran as fast as she could out of the room and through the portrait hole, not caring if he was watching or if he followed. She had no idea where she was going or what she was going to do, but she knew that she had to get away from him. She had to get away from him as fast as she could.
****
Hermione didn't seek out her other best friend---she didn't want to be around anyone associated with the name Weasley at the moment. She'd found her way back to her old room in Gryffindor Tower. One look at her tear-stained face and Lavender and Parvati welcomed her with open arms.
To Hermione's surprise, both girls were quite supportive. They'd listened attentively as she poured out the whole sordid story for them. She kept waiting for someone to wake her up and it would all be some bad dream, but it was all heartbreakingly, painfully real.
Hermione was seated on Parvati's bed, a tissue box in her lap. Parvati was seated beside her and Lavender was sitting on the edge of her own bed, which was directly beside Parvati's.
"It's all my fault," Hermione said, forlornly.
"Your fault?" Lavender and Parvati both said indignantly at the same time.
"Yes," Hermione said, dabbing her eyes with a tissue. "Because he wanted me to do it with him and I wanted to as well, so much. And we so nearly did lots of times. If we had, it'd be me having his baby and not Ginny."
Parvati and Lavender exchanged a look.
"Look, Hermione," Lavender said firmly. "He was your boyfriend and she was your friend! Why couldn't they just leave each other alone!"
Hermione shook her head. "They don't know. They don't know. It's not like them, Lav. It's not like either of them. Maybe someone put something in their drinks?"
"Grow up, Hermione," Parvati said. "You remember how Ginny Weasley used to look at him like he was the greatest thing since sliced bread? Who didn't know how she used to fancy Harry?"
"But that was ages ago," Hermione said. "Ginny knew I was with Harry. She kept telling me how happy she was for us."
"Look, I'm not going to speak to either of them again and if she comes anywhere near me…" Parvati's voice trailed off.
"I just don't know what I'm going to do," Hermione said sadly.
Lavender gave her friend a smile and walked over to Hermione.
"I tell you what you're going to do, Hermione," Lavender said firmly. "Never let them see how much they've hurt you. Show a brave face. We're Gryffindors after all, right?"
Despite herself, Hermione gave a smile. "Easier said than done."
"You can do it," Parvati chimed in. "And we'll help you. Stay with us for awhile. It'll be like old times."
Hermione nodded. "Thanks, girls."
Hermione doubted things would be "just like old times" for quite some time.
****
Harry sat in Professor Dumbledore's office, seemingly in a daze. He felt as if he was watching his life play out in front of him without any say. Ginny sat beside him, listening to her mother drone on about how disappointed she was in her daughter's behavior.
"Sixteen years old," Molly Weasley kept saying. "Sixteen years old and having a baby. Ginny, how did this happen?"
"She wasn't alone in this," Harry said quietly. "It's just as much my fault as Ginny's."
Ginny looked over at him, gratefully. She squeezed his hand in support.
"I wouldn't have expected this from either of you," Molly said. "I was worried sick when Madame Pomfrey sent me the emergency owl post telling me I needed to get here as soon as possible. I had no idea that this would be what greeted me. I'm just glad that your father's not here to see this. If he was, I don't know what he'd say, Ginny."
"Harry and Ginny are going to need our support as they go through with this," Dumbledore interrupted. "This isn't the time to point fingers or make them feel any worse than they already do."
"Albus, you know I wouldn't do that," Molly said quickly. "I mean, you can understand how thrown I was at this news."
"You're not alone in that, Mrs. Weasley," Harry wanted to say. But he kept his mouth shut.
"This isn't the first time we've had this happen," Dumbledore said. "I don't see any reason why Ginny can't continue her studies here. She'll be under the care of Madame Pomfrey."
Molly nodded. "Well, Harry. What are you going to do?"
"Me?" Harry couldn't help asking. How was he supposed to answer that when he had no idea what on earth he was going to do? What he wanted most of all was to find Hermione and make sure she was okay and try and make her understand. He knew that his face would be the last one she'd want to see for awhile, if ever again.
"Yes," Molly said indignantly. "I don't think that question is too much to ask considering what you've done. I've always thought of you like another son, Harry. You know that. I can't help feeling disappointed in you. This is the last thing I would have ever expected."
"I'm so sorry," Harry said. "I didn't plan for this to happen and neither did Ginny. I'm not going to leave her alone in all of this. She'll have me to depend on."
"Are you going to marry her?" Molly asked.
"Marriage?" Harry said, nearly choking on the word. He looked over at Ginny, who to his surprise was eyeing him expectantly.
"Yes," Molly said. "A baby needs two parents, after all. A mother and father."
"Well, yes," Harry said. "But,"
"But, what?" Molly asked.
"Times have changed, Molly," Dumbledore interrupted.
Molly opened her mouth to respond, but Harry interrupted for her. With a deep breath, he got up from his chair and stood in front of Ginny. He took her hand in his and got down on one knee. He looked up at her and said the words he imagined a million times asking Hermione.
"Will you marry me?" he asked softly.
She started to cry and nodded her head. She wrapped her arms around Harry and he hesitantly put his arms around her. Molly beamed at the two of them as Dumbledore looked at the scene unfolding before him with a bemused expression.
"That's how it should be, then," Molly said proudly.
This is no where near as it should be.
***
Luna was trying to keep Ron calm, but was finding this a losing battle. A few minutes ago, they'd both heard the news about Harry & Ginny.
"I'm going to kill him for doing that to my sister," Ron was saying angrily as he paced back and forth in the hall.
They were waiting just outside of Dumbledore's office.
"Ron," Luna cautioned. "That's not going to solve anything."
"How could he do this?" Ron asked. "Not just to Ginny, but to Hermione! She must be so upset."
Luna, who hadn't been surprised to hear that Ginny was pregnant, was nearly blown away by the news that Harry was the father. That didn't make sense to Luna at all. She'd been around Harry and Hermione loads of times. There was no possible way, drunk or sober, that Harry would ever betray Hermione like that. Luna knew that as well as she knew that the sun would rise in the morning and set in the evening.
"Ron," Luna said. "You killing Harry isn't going to solve anything. For one thing, it'd put you in Azkaban."
"Well, I wasn't planning on killing him, per se," Ron said. "Just hurting him. Maybe unloading a few hexes on him for good measure."
Ron sat down on the bench beside Luna, who put a comforting arm on his shoulder.
"I should have seen this coming," Ron said.
"How were you to have known?" Luna asked him.
"I'd noticed some strange stuff going on with Ginny for months and Harry the past couple of weeks," Ron said. "I should have put two and two together."
Luna couldn't say why, but she wasn't buying Ginny's version of events. She had a feeling that once Ron calmed down, he'd not be so willing to take his sister at her word, either. Ginny had been carrying on like this for months. Harry had just started acting all quiet and distant in the past few weeks. The timetable didn't add up. Luna wasn't going to voice her suspicions yet, but she wasn't about to forget them. People she cared about were involved in this. She wasn't going to let them down.
"Hey, Ron," Luna said. "They're probably going to be in there for awhile. Why don't you and I go down to the kitchens and nick a snack? You know you always feel better when you eat."
Ron nodded and taking his girlfriend's hand led her down the hall to the kitchens.
"This doesn't make sense," Ron said, shaking his head to Luna. "It doesn't make sense at all."
"No, it doesn't," she agreed.
"