Unofficial Portkey Archive

"What's wrong with my tongue?
These words keep slipping away
I stutter, I stumble
Like I've got nothing to say
I'm feeling nervous, trying to be so perfect
Because I know you're worth it."
-Things I'll Never Say, Avril Lavinge

Chapter Two

"Morning, Prongs," Sirius nodded, sitting at James and Lily's kitchen table, doing the Daily Prophet crossword puzzle. He had a great deal of it done.

"Why are you reading that in our flat?" James asked, scratching his bare chest sleepily.

Sirius shrugged. "I had hoped I'd get some company," he said, sipping a cup of coffee.

James blinked at him. "Did you make coffee too?"

"Naw, I went over to Wormtail's and he was making a pot, so I took the rest of it." He motions to the pot in front of him. "He told me I have to return the pot though, as the last time I stole it, I didn't return it for three weeks."

"When were you over there?" James asked, sliding into the seat across from Sirius.

"About four hours ago," Sirius looked down at his puzzle. "I need a seven letter word for 'Gnome.'"

He groaned. "Padfoot, you know I'm bloody horrible at those things," James shook his head. "Ugly?"

"Ugly would be four letters, Prongs," Sirius pondered deeply, rubbing the dark circles under his eyes.

"Didn't you sleep last night?" James asked. Sirius shook his head.

"No, wasn't tired, really," he continued to think. "Stupid? No, that's six letters."

Lily shuffled out of the bedroom, her dressing robe open to reveal a very scanty nightie. She rounded the corner to the kitchen and jumped, quickly covering herself up, but not before Sirius got a nice glance at her.

"Uh-oh, sexy Lily," he smirked lewdly. "Somebody got some-"

"Can it," James glared at him, sitting down on the other side of Sirius.

"What are you doing here?" Lily asked, sitting down on James' lap, sleepily.

"Working on this damn Prophet puzzle and drinking coffee," he said, offering her the pot. "And see, I brought some for you too!"

"Where did you get the coffee?" Lily asked him.

"Wormy," he winked at her.

"You two are horrible, going over and taking his food," she chided them.

"Would you rather starve?" James asked, putting his chin on her shoulder.

"Lily, I need a seven letter word for 'Gnome,' that has an 'l' in it," Sirius said, biting on the quill.

"Problem?" Lily yawned. Sirius looked up at her and filled in the squares.

"Lily! You're a genius!" he cheered. "Now, I need a six letter word for 'What happens when you meet a troll in a hallway.'"

Lily turned to James and began playing with the top of his bare chest. "Since you two aren't doing anything at the moment, how about you go and get us some food?"

"Why don't you go get some food if you're so upset about it?" Sirius snorted, looking at the blank squares pointedly.

"Because," Lily turned to James and bared a bit of her nightie. "James doesn't want to make me upset, does he? Else no more back massages..."

"Come along, Padfoot, we're off to the grocery store!" James grinned.

"Good choice," Lily ran a finger down his chest and chuckled.

"Five letter word for weak male," Sirius said, loudly, acting as if he was doing the crossword. "Has two 's's in it..."

"What do you want me to cook tonight, hm?" Lily said, ignoring Sirius. "A chicken? We haven't had one of those in a while."

Sirius dropped his quill and his ears perked up. "Chicken? Can I have some?"

"If you stop making fun of James, perhaps," Lily said, over her shoulder. "And if you go buy me one, and get some more food while you're at it."

"Come along, Prongs, we're off to the grocery store!" Sirius jumped up. Lily got off of James' lap to let him get up and go get dressed.

"Make sure you two don't buy a whole bunch of junk, too," Lily warned them.

"Junk, puh. We don't get junk," Sirius huffed indignantly.

"Marshmallows?" James asked, holding up a bag.

"Yup."

"Sprinkles?"

"Yup."

"Whipped cream?"

"..." Sirius stared at him and then a grin came to his face. "One for your house, one for mine."

"Nice," James grinned, throwing two cans of whipped cream into the shopping cart. "Oh, yeah, Lily said she wanted a chicken-"

"Prongs, lemme ask you something. How good are her back massages? Good enough to do whatever she wants you to do?"

James gave him a meaningful look. "Yeah, they're that good. Pity I'm the only one who gets to find out about them, as they usually lead straight to mind-boggling shags."

Sirius snorted. "You are so whipped."

"Am not!" James huffed indignantly.

"Jaaaaaames!" Sirius mocked Lily's higher voice. "James, I'm hoooooooot. Go turn on the faaaaaaaaaaaaaaan."

"Shut up!" James blushed. "Talk to me when you get a girl like Lily."

"Difference between my girls and your girls is that my girls don't hang around for long," Sirius said.

"Really? And how long have you been shagging Dorcas?" James nudged him in the stomach.

"Dorcas happens to be a very good shagmate," Sirius picked up a bottle of chocolate and tossed it into the shopping cart. "'s not as if I'm going to marry her or anything." He threw a snide look at James. "Course, neither are you, at the current rate of your relationship-"

"Actually," James grinned and pulled out a small box. Sirius blinked at him and then scowled.

"You bloody bastard! I thought you were going to bring me when you went shopping for one!" He stared at James jealously.

"I was, honestly, but I was out walking yesterday and I saw this and...It spoke to me, Padfoot," James gently opened the box and looked at the sparkling diamond ring inside. "It said 'Buy me James! Buy me!' and I just couldn't resist." Sirius 'ooh'ed and peered down at it.

"How much?"

"More than the necklace."

"Aren't you still paying that one off?"

"Uh-huh."

"Yikes."

"Yeah."

"How ya gonna do it?" Sirius asked, when James pocketed the ring again. "And when?"

"Tonight, most likely," James grinned. "I wanted to wait until I showed you the ring, 'cause I knew you'd blow a gasket if I proposed without you knowing."

"What are you going to do?" Sirius asked, grinning.

"Well, I'm thinking that after dinner tonight, I'll ask her to go on a walk with me," James said.

"We've got to work tonight," Sirius reminded him.

"Yes, well, not until 8. And how long is it going to take to say four words, huh?"

His friend shook his head. "You'd be surprised."

"So we're going to be walking right," James grabbed Sirius' arm as if he were Lily. "And sometime along the way, I'll hand her a flower or something pretty."

He reached up and gave Sirius a canister of tapioca pudding, as if it were the flower. Sirius cooed, and in a high voice, said, "Oh James! You're so thoughtful!" He gripped James' arm tighter and grinned lovingly.

James gave him a sideways look, and then continued. "Then I'm going to say something about the stars and her eyes, something really corny and sappy."

"Say, 'the shining stars are nothing compared to the shining in your eyes,'" Sirius grinned.

"The...what?" James said, turning to look at him. They were still arm-in-arm.

"The shining stars....are nothing....compared to the shining...in your eyes," he repeated.

"The shining stars are nothing compared to the shining in your eyes," James repeated. Sirius let out a high-pitched coo and rubbed his head against James' shoulder.

"Oh James, you've such a way with words!" Sirius cried. Neither of them noticed the old lady coming into the aisle behind them.

"Then, I'm going to stop and take her hands, like so," he reached down and grabbed Sirius' hands. "And look up into her eyes, and say-" Sirius reached over and handed him a can of beans. "Thank you, Padfoot," he cleared his throat and dropped on one knee sappily. "Will you marry me?" He proffered the beans.

"Oh James!" Sirius squealed, taking the can of beans and holding it close to him.

"Ahem..."

James, on his knee and holding a can of beans up to Sirius, and Sirius, squealing like a girl and holding a jar of tapioca pudding in one hand and beans in the other, both turned to look at the old woman, a little boy, and one of the store workers staring at them oddly.

James stood up and cleared his throat. Sirius was too busy hugging his can of beans to notice the change in atmosphere.

"James! Yes! I'll marry-" He turned to see the group of people and his face dropped. The store worker raised his eyebrow and opened his mouth to say something, but James drug Sirius out of their eyesight into the next aisle.

"Dinner was delicious," Sirius said, patting his stomach.

"I should say so," James glared at him, taking a sip of wine.

"Look, if you wanted the legs, you should have said something."

"You ate both the legs, a wing, and half of the breast, Padfoot," James growled. "In case you didn't know the chicken's anatomy, the only thing left was one wing and the other half of the breast. Not only that, but you ate half of the potatoes, three quarters of the salad, and drank half the bottle of wine."

"I'm a hungry boy," Sirius grinned at James over his glass of wine. He stood up and stretched. "Well, I'd best get ready for work. James, are you going to be making any beans later?" he asked, giving James a very poignant look.

"I daresay you've had enough to eat," Lily chuckled, beginning to clean up.

"Beans?" James asked, confused. When Lily had her back turned, Sirius pointed to his left ring finger, and James nodded, coming to a realization.

"Something I'm missing?" Lily asked, turning to them from the kitchen.

"Nothing at all, Baby," James grinned. "Padfoot was just leaving, weren't you, Padfoot?"

"Yup, consider me gone," Sirius grinned and walked to the door on the living room wall that connected their two flats.

James took a deep breath and walked into the kitchen where Lily was making sure that the dishes cleaned themselves properly. He snuck up behind her and put his arms around her, surprising her. She gasped and a plate fell to the sink with a clatter.

"James!" Lily growled at him and she repaired the plate.

"Come out for a walk with me?" he asked, kissing her ear.

"James, we've got to go to work in a few minutes."

"We can go for a little fifteen minute walk," James whispered, pulling her away from the sink. They walked down the stairs and into the chilly night air and began their walk in the city where James grew up.

The sun had set, yet there were no stars or moon to light their way. James noticed this just as he was about to unleash his 'stars shining' line that Sirius had told him to use. If there were no stars to "reference" by, he would not have the "spur of the moment" feeling that he was going for. Hence, his entire proposal preparation was mute.

He looked over to Lily and a goofy grin came to his face. This was Lily, his girlfriend. He hadn't had trouble talking to her in years. He told her his deepest secrets and his fears, and even was no stranger to talking dirty to her in their more heated moments.

Four little words, James, he told himself.

He opened his mouth.

And no sound came out. He cleared his throat and opened his mouth, ready to tell her....

Tell her what? He couldn't just spring into it, could he? He had to create the mood.

But how exactly was he going to create the mood? Certainly not by walking along with his mouth hanging open dumbly.

He supposed he could start by telling her that he loved her, something that was quite easy for him to do. He cleared his throat.

"I love you," he said, his voice small and odd-sounding. Lily looked up at him, a concerned smile on her face.

"I love you too, are you all right?"

"Yes..." the oddness in his voice wouldn't go away. Right, now that was out of the way. How come the mood wasn't there yet?

Sometimes, he decided, the best laid plans are made on a whim. After all, in his past dealings with Lily, doing things on a lam worked fifty percent of the time. So he took a great big breath and opened his mouth again...

...to no sound coming out. His brain was completely blank, other than the endless cycle of thoughts circulating in his head. He could think of nothing to fill the open hole of his mouth, and suddenly began to panic.

He was sure he looked quite goofy, walking along a Muggle street hand in hand with Lily, staring at her instead of what was in front of him, mouth open with no sound coming out.

He probably looked even more goofy when he ran head first into a light pole.

"Oh my! James!" Lily was over him in a second. "Honey, are you all right?"

"Ow..." James blinked, sitting up. He looked over to the bushes where he could see two dog eyes reflecting off of the lights. The dog snorted and shook his head disappearing in the bushes.

"I think we've had enough of walking tonight, do you feel well enough to Apparate?" Lily asked, fussing over him.

"Yeah, I do," James sighed, the weight of the ring in his pocket ever more pronounced. "Let's go find somewhere to Apparate then."

Lily helped him up and they walked to a dark alleyway where they could Apparate. James could see the black dog following them in the shadows, and he sighed. Sirius was going to give him hell for this.