Chapter 22 - Survivors and new beginnings
Several days after the attack on Beauxbatons Academy, a very official visitor from the Ministry's Department of Improper Use of Magic arrived at the school, demanding to speak to the headmaster. She was escorted to the headmaster's office and he cordially offered her a seat.
"My dear Mafalda, how good to see you again. How may I be of service to you this fine day?"
"We wish to interview Harry Potter and inspect his wand for improper use. He has been directly accused by one Rita Skeeter for causing her current… condition."
"And exactly what is her condition and when was he supposed to have caused this ailment? Harry Potter's been on these grounds since Christmas, he has not left for any reason."
"Rita Skeeter alleges that on the morning of February 15 th he invaded her home while she was asleep and caused her to have… blemishes appear on her face. We must test his wand to see if it has been used for this act before he is to be taken for a trial."
"Preposterous. Harry was in the Gryffindor common area that morning, I saw him there myself and had a conversation with him, around 8:15, I believe. I believe that was the morning Ms. Skeeter's articles were published, and you say that was when this 'attack' occurred?"
"Precisely. If we can show his wand was not used for this attack, then I'm sure he will be cleared, but we must be certain."
"No, I believe you had better be certain of your claims before you confront him. I do not wish him to be upset; he has been through much the past couple of years. Can you tell me exactly why she believes these blemishes are Harry's work?"
"It's the nature of the, umm, shapes. Across her forehead the words 'Unregistered Animagi' are formed, and on each cheek the words 'Liar' and 'Fraud'. She also claimed several additional 'terms' appear on other portions of her body, but she refuses to elaborate."
The ancient wizard chuckled at the revelation, "So exactly why is this a problem? I believe these are quite accurate descriptions of her. If you inquire you may find the message on her forehead is correct, and one only needs to read her work to prove the other messages. No. You may not disturb Mr. Potter while he is in this school. And should he be approached in the future, the ramifications will be most unpleasant."
"But… the charges…"
"Are themselves slanderous and false. You can tell her for me that if she pursues this issue, I will see to it that she is sent to Azkaban for her invading these grounds illegally and for the slander in her articles. Those are provable facts. You may also inform her that I, as a member of the Wizengamot, shall launch an investigation into her actions and her improper use of magic, to cause harm to minor children under my direct care."
"Sir, I understand. Please let me reassure you that I am only following the direct instruction from the Minster himself."
"Then it may be time to question his actions. Now, good day."
He stood and directed the Ministry official to the door.
"You do realize this will not bode well at the Ministry?"
"I do realize that there's no one at the Ministry that can handle Tom Riddle. And should the Minister continue to ignore this fact, his position will be in jeopardy. Now, please, I believe your business here is concluded. Again, good day to you."
He left her at the outer door to his office and closed the door.
In the week that followed the attack, the surviving Beauxbatons Academy students arrived and were sheltered in three of the houses. Although not one student was selected for Slytherin House, they were split equally between the three remaining houses where beds were made available for those students. Each was accepted into the safety of their temporary homes not only by the castle herself, but by the students as well.
The teaching staff joined their students in safety to assist the expanded student population. This attack validated the reasons for the formation and now expansion of the DA. Hermione and Ron worked to merge the new students into the burgeoning ranks. Harry never lapsed back into his depression during this time, although he was fighting to control his anger.
The attack itself was not reported in the Daily Prophet or in the Quibbler. The Ministry managed to suppress and down-play the news of the attack, thinking they learned from the events of September. The Quibbler had, however, focused its efforts on reliable and honest reporting practices. Using an un-named and 'fictitious' reporter for an equally un-named and 'fictitious' newspaper as an example for this series of articles. The first several focused on the problems false and inaccurate reporting could cause not only those involved, but those that read the fake reports.
There was one report in the Quibbler that had not been reported in the Daily Prophet that was the extended leave of a reporter to recover from a mysterious skin ailment. Luna kept each new article on the problems of one Rita Skeeter, how the day after Valentine's Day; she dropped from sight, and subsequent reports of her going into seclusion. Luna was the first to read about the strange blemishes on her forehead and cheeks, and how nothing seemed to remove them.
- - -
Shortly after the inquiry from the Ministry's Department of Improper Use of Magic, Harry, Hermione and Luna schemed together to help celebrate Ron's seventeenth birthday. Hermione's seventeenth birthday had passed without acknowledgment since it was a mere two and a half weeks after the Kings Cross attack. Also, the service for Hannah Abbott and Padma Patil had been only a few days before her birthday, and no one was in a celebratory mood. Ron was still convalescing, and Harry wasn't himself during that time, Ginny had spent her time helping Harry overcome his depression, and Hermione had simply forgotten the day herself; coming 'of age' in the world she had known for only a few years didn't seem as important as it was to Ron, who had talked endlessly about being able to take the apperation tests. Harry planned with Ginny and Luna's help, to not only throw a party for Ron, but to include Hermione and correct this oversight. Although she had come of age and she was able to take the apperation tests in September, she decided to wait for her friends, it wasn't as important to her as her friends were.
Hermione and Harry spent the Friday evening before Ron's birthday reviewing the notes they compiled from Harry's two books. It had almost become an obsession with them, they read and re-read the same volumes looking for additional clues they may have missed. Hermione had been keeping additional notes to herself in her private log, while Harry spent his time trying to understand the strange code in his book. The couple worked on the same bits of information, long into the night.
Harry rubbed his eyes and slammed his book closed.
"Damn it, there's nothing in here. We're wasting our time." He muttered as he slumped in his chair.
She felt her hand grow icy cold. She hadn't felt this before and that bothered her. She looked up to him and could see he was afraid, one of the very few times she had seen him like this. She tapped the journal she was writing in with her wand, muttering her incantation, and put it inside the volume she was reviewing. "Harry, I think we both need a break, we've gone through these books a dozen times and I know we're just missing some little detail. It's nearly one o'clock in the morning. I, for one, am quite tired."
"Then go on. I can't sleep thinking of this."
She pushed the books to one side as she decided to try and get his mind off things and get some fresh air at the same time. She wouldn't leave him like this; it would have been as bad as if she left him in the chamber if she went off to bed now.
"Accio Harry's Cloak, Accio my Cloak!" She called, as she waved her wand. Both cloaks floated down into the common room where they were working.
"Come on, let's get out of here." She tossed his cloak to him and grabbed his arm, and pulled him toward the door.
"Wait, won't we…"
"I'm a prefect, remember? We'll just tell anyone we run into I needed your help. I thought a walk to the Astronomy Tower would give us a break and we could get some air too."
Without saying another word, he complied. They left the relative safety of the common room into the darkened halls of the school. She pulled out her wand and with a "Lumos", she lit the way. As they made their way to the bottom of the tower, she took the opportunity she had been waiting for, feigning a chill, she grabbed his arm as the climbed the circular stairs to the rooftop platform. He never noticed the smile on her face as she held his arm, but she did notice her favorite sensation from her scar return and her smile deepened.
"Nox," she muttered and extinguished her light. "Come over here, its not as windy, and there's a pretty view." She said as they sat along the wall.
"Harry, I really want to tell..."
"Hermione, wait. I need to tell you this before I lose my nerve. I need to tell you how much you and Ron and Ginny have done for me, I've never really told any of you how much it's helped, especially this year."
"Harry, I…"
"Wait. I thought… I, well… when Ginny and I were together, I felt better. I was comfortable and happy when we were together, but I couldn't feel anything more. I know it hurt her deeply, and I do love her."
Hermione's thoughts raced through her head as she felt her heart lodge in her throat, she was about to tell him the one thing she's been afraid to do, and now he's confessed his feelings for Ginny.
"But, she's now you sister, well step-sister." She felt her heart about to explode; now knowing he's lost to her.
"She knows how I feel about her, but we both know she's better off with someone else. Besides, she's Ron's sister and yeah, it would be weird."
"Have you told her you're in love with her?" Her heart stopped as she said those words.
"Hermione, I'm not 'in' love with her. I mean I feel the same as I do for Ron or you. You've all been my family. That's what I meant."
Her heart resumed beating. "Oh. What about Cho? Do you still like her?"
"No. That's over. It was such a big mistake, last year in Hogsmeade. I felt like I made a fool out of myself."
A slight wind blew through the rooftop, sending a chill thru them. He noticed her shiver slightly, and pulled her closer, draping his cloak over her, sharing their warmth. She nuzzled into his side, like it was the most natural and normal thing.
"Hermione, there's something I want, tonight, from you. But I don't know how…"
"To ask me? Harry, just ask." She half expected him to take her in his arms and declare his devotion to her; to take her there and share the deepest physical bond a man and woman could share; to make mad and passionate love to her. She also prayed that he didn't notice her heart began to race.
"There were times, recently, when I had to think about my life. I hated my life before I met you and Ron, before I came here. This has been my only true home. I feel cheated because of those 'things' I've had to live with. My fondest memory was getting a bloody dog biscuit for my birthday one year. I wish I had better memories." She started to tear up, and in the dark of the night, Harry could feel her sorrow. "Please, I don't want your pity."
"Oh, Harry, it's not pity. I wish I could erase your past and give you a pleasant one. Please, it's those animals I pity for what they've lost by treating you poorly and never getting to know you, who you truly are."
"I'm sorry, I should have known you better. Hermione, I need you."
Her pulse quickened as she tried to understand him. "Harry, anything I can do, or give you, it's yours." She felt her stomach quiver in anticipation.
"What was it like?" He asked softly.
"What was what like? I don't understand." She lost her train of thought at his unexpected request.
"Growing up loved and happy. What was it like having parents and people that care about you?"
She smiled, and began to think. "Is that all you want? Of course, Harry. I never thought about it before, but I understand. Where do you want me to start?"
"I don't know, what are you parents like? I really don't know them; except for Christmas I've only met them in Diagon Alley. What surprised me was they were willing to take me in as a son if the Weasleys didn't or couldn't."
"That defines them completely. They're genuinely open and caring people. They talk about you a lot when I'm home. Asking how you're doing if you're happy and stuff. It's strange because they didn't take to Ron like they have with you. It's sweet, really. I never thought about it much, but I guess they care for you because of your past.
"Daddy's a real sweetie. I guess I'm a daddy's girl, love him to bits, cause he makes me laugh. Kinda like Ron's sense of humor, but I think daddy is funnier. Mum's more serious and stricter; I guess I take after her a lot. She and I use to read together when I was a baby, I remember falling asleep on her lap with a stack of books next to us on the table. Mum and I did all the girly things, like shop and we'd play dress up; she'd dress me in her wildest clothes and try to brush the tangles from my hair. She never did get them out, almost like my hair had a mind of its own."
"Did I ever tell you the time my aunt nearly shaved my head out of spite? Just because it's always been a mess."
"Oh, Harry, no, you never told me. She's a mean and spiteful old crow."
"But she is my mum's only living relation. Anyway my hair all grew back that night. It got her even angrier at me and she locked me in the cupboard for a week with only 2 slices of bread and a glass of water each day."
Hermione stopped trying to hold her tears back. And let them flow, being grateful it was quite dark. She swallowed hard, to clear her silent sobs, and continued. "Mum never seemed to understand why things happened unexpectedly, there was a time when I first tried to ride a bicycle. I kept wobbling and I started to fall, just as a car came around the bend and jumped the curb. The car hit me and I thought I was going to die, but something swept me aside and the car went over my bike. The driver apparently had a heart attack at the wheel and died. I don't know how it happened, but I never got a scratch."
"That's horrible, did you know at the time what happened to him?"
"No, mum rushed me inside thinking I was hit. Daddy tried to help that poor man, but there was nothing he could do." She looked into his eyes, and he could see her tears, assuming this was a hard memory.
"No more bad memories, ok? I hate seeing you cry. What about you dad? You said he made you laugh, tell me about him." He wiped her tears from her cheeks, and felt another shiver, thinking it was from the chill. "Come on, I think you're too cold out here, lets go back inside."
"No, Harry. I'd rather stay here with you; it's so peaceful. Daddy and I used to have pretend fights every evening which ended up us chasing each other around the lounge. Those chases ended with dad throwing his socks at me and me whacking him on the leg, and then bolting to my room screaming 'good night'. He'd chase me up the stairs pretending to be mad at me for whacking him, and we always ended up on the floor in a tickle fight, which he always won."
"So I guess that means you're quite ticklish?" He asked with a mischievous grin.
"DON'T get any ideas, mister. I'm warning you."
"Ok… don't hex me because you let me in on a secret." He replied with a grin.
"We stopped playing like that recently when he noticed… umm when I… well, you know, when I started to grow up. He started feeling uncomfortable. I really miss those times; it was our little private game.
"And then there was the time we nearly burned the kitchen down, and had fun doing it! We were trying to do something 'nice' for mum on her birthday. But neither of us had ANY idea how to cook, and we tried to make a soufflé, it was a huge disaster. I'm afraid I'm not much of a cook; I really take after daddy there. Meanwhile, she's upstairs, wondering what the racket is downstairs and why it's 9:30 and her breakfast-in-bed hasn't arrived yet and all the while we're laughing hysterically at the lopsided half scorched soufflé. When daddy 'burned' the water for her tea, we gave up. She was rewarded with a breakfast of cold store bought corn muffins and a glass of milk.
"We're still close, daddy and me; I tell him almost everything, except those times when things got dicey last June. He knows about the Troll and when I was petrified, but I didn't tell them what happened at the Ministry. I don't think he's told mum about any of those otherwise she'd never let me come back here." She felt him stiffen and her hand began to sting.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to bring up…" She added quickly, hoping to calm him.
"It's not your fault; I guess I'm still not over it. Please, no more tears, ok? I want to share happy thoughts and memories. If you want bad memories, I could numb your mind with the things I remember."
She tightened her grip into an impromptu hug, even though she had her arms around him for the past hour or so while they talked. She lay there in his arms for a long while, simply listening to him breathing, feeling his mood relax with each breath. She felt something else, something she's never felt before as the stinging in her hand stopped and turned into the pleasant tingle she loved. She felt a hand gently stoke through her hair, never once catching a tangle. They lay there silent for nearly an hour, both emotionally exhausted but neither wanting to leave the tranquil moment they were sharing.
"Mmmm… Harry…" She moaned softly.
"Sorry. I didn't mean to…" as he pulled his hand away.
"No, it felt wonderful. No one's ever been able to do that without pulling on a tangle. I know I've never told you this before, and God knows how many times I've tried." She felt ready. Now was the perfect moment to tell her love how she felt.
"Shhh… I know." She tried to figure what he meant, but he still wouldn't give the chance to think it out. "Hermione? Can I ask you about him?"
"Who?"
"That bloke you had the dream about. I'd like to know if he feels the same way for you. I know you told me I've never met him, so all I can think is he's a muggle from home, right?"
"Uhhh, I'd rather not talk about it. Please, Harry, it's that… I, he… I can't talk about him, not with you. I hope you understand."
"Does he love you?"
"I don't know." She whispered.
"He doesn't know how you feel, does he?"
"No. I've known him a long time, but I don't think he knows I'm alive."
"D-do you love him?" He asked tentatively.
"Yes." She said looking away from him.
"Then you need to find him and tell him how you feel, you might be surprised. I'm happy for you. I want you to be happy. I'm glad you can feel the love I'll never know."
"Harry, you need to give yourself time. Sometimes it could happen overnight, or it could build slowly with someone you'd never expect, that's why I was happy for you when you and Ginny were together. I had hoped more would have come of it."
They sat in silence for a few minutes, each had to absorb more then they wanted to know.
"Hermione, you do know that you're one of the most important people in my life, if not the most important. I can't believe how stupid I was to try and push all of you away." He paused as he tried to find the words for what he felt, "of everyone I know, of all my friends and so-called friends, I want you… I need you, to always be in my life, more the Ron or Ginny or Dumbledore. I trust you more then any of them. Please promise me we'll always be the closest of friends, forever?"
'Friends? No, I can't be just his friend anymore, ' she thought. 'I've got to tell him that I'm in love with him.'
"Harry, did you ever want more then that with someone?" She needed to work her way the one thing she wanted so very hard to tell him, but she was beginning to feel he'd reject her love, if just to keep her safe, and also risk loosing his friendship. She was walking a very fine line and was afraid of the consequences if she made a mistake.
"Yeah, I did. But after Sirius was… after that night, I don't ever want to feel that pain again. And I'll never risk someone else again." His voice tensed slightly having to remember his godfather.
"So you'd rather be alone forever then risk being happy, even for one night? What if this was all over and you were free of the prophecy? Would you still feel that way?"
"I… I don't know. I want to forget about all this, the prophecy, Voldemort, all of it. I want to forget what I missed because of him." She felt the quiver in his voice, and his change from angry to scared to happy happened so quickly, she lost track of his feelings; she felt there must be something else.
"I understand." She backed away from the line she almost crossed. She nuzzled into his arm under the cloak they shared, and still felt his hand in her hair.
They lay there, both thinking about what the other had said, and what was not said. He was beginning to slip away again; his moods were still shifting almost too fast to understand them. She cursed the lag in her connection to him and thought about a cheerful time.
"Daddy tried to teach me to dive and swim once before I came here, I really was bad, and he thought it was hilarious and mum thought I was hilarious to watch swimming, splashing and not getting anywhere. I nearly drowned in a lake once, daddy tossed me in the water and I couldn't make it back. He wouldn't even try to get me."
"Hermione! That's horrible, obviously someone pulled you out, right?"
"Well, no. The water was only up to my chin, I walked out once I calmed down. He scared the hell out of me, and he kept laughing the whole time."
"So what'd you do?"
"I pushed him and mum in when they weren't looking. I was the only one in a swimsuit."
"Haaa haaa…. That must have been a sight to see."
"It was, they were pissed off, and they chased me half way around the lake. We all finally ended up in a water fight in the lake. It was one of those moments I wish you had." She sighed deeply, "Harry?"
"Yeah?"
"Thanks for letting me back in your life." She curled as close to him as she could, no longer for warmth.
He felt her body begin to relax and her breathing became slower and regular. She was asleep in his arms. He sat there, still stoking her hair, for nearly hour thinking about everything they shared. He thought about how comfortable she felt in his arms, very different from when he and Ginny spent a few quite moments together. After the things she told him, but more the way she told him, he now realized what he was beginning to feel for her. But he also told himself he wasn't good enough for someone like her. When he knew she was in a deep sleep, he felt it was safe to tell her what's been bothering him, what he tried to understand for so long but couldn't.
"Hermione, I think I'm falling in love with you." He whispered to her as he continued to run his fingers through her hair. "You're the best friend I've ever had, and you're the kindest person I know. But I now know that all we'll ever have is our friendship. I want you to be happy, so please tell that guy how you feel about him; I know he'll love you." The visions he had of her lying in his arms, bleeding from the same blade that he once held in the chamber filled his mind, and he felt a tear roll off his cheek. She looked so peaceful now in his arms, but he knew all that waited for her in his future was pain and death.
"Sleep, I'll find a way to protect you. I promise." He placed a tender kiss on her forehead and held her as he drifted off to sleep.
He woke first, the first rays of the sun poked through the trees, and from the vantage point on the rooftop, the view was more magnificent then he ever seen before. He softly nudged her to try and wake her, rather unsure just how to wake a girl sleeping in his arms.
"Hey, wake up." He whispered.
"Harry?"
"Come on Mione, it's time to get up. We need to sneak back to our rooms."
"Huh, what you call me? It sounded nice."
"Umm… I guess I called you 'Mione'."
"I remember my gran used to call me that when I was a baby, I always liked it when she said it but I hated it when anyone else tried to call me that, until now. I kind of like the way you said it. It'll be our private secret."
"Ok, then just when we're alone, ok?" He gave her a tight hug and stood after they finally separated. He held his hand to her and helped her to her feet, as she stretched the stiffness from her legs. They stood on the roof, this time she was shivering from the cold. He wrapped his cloak around the both of them as that watched the sun rise in the distance, it was the most romantic moment she'd ever had in her life, but she couldn't share the inner warmth it brought.
"We need to go back, before anyone notices we've been gone all night." She said, but wished they could stay like this just s little while longer.
She sighed lightly. "You're right, as always, its so quiet here in the morning. I have a confession. I've come here often recently, using my father's cloak. There's something about the sunrise that gives me hope."
"Mr. Potter, why you're just a romantic at heart," she teased. "Why, I bet you even believe that one day you'll wake up and the girl of your dreams will be there in your arms." She forced a grin and slipped away from his embrace under his cloak. She walked to the rooftop door and left him standing there, speechless.
"If only you knew." He muttered and followed her back to the Gryffindor tower.