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To You I Belong by husker_fan_2006
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To You I Belong

husker_fan_2006

Chapter 2: Photo Albums and Memories

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Whenever dawn turns to night
And all the dreams sing their song
And in the daylight forever
To you I belong.

- To You I Belong by B*Witched

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Dear Lily,

I know you probably won't to hear this, but I have to tell you, being a good witch I'm going to let you know, even though you haven't given a crap about any of us and we haven't heard from you in ages. Anyways, Isabelle died last night. She was killed, by the killing curse, and the Dark Mark was found over her house. Her funeral is on Monday evening. You probably won't come, but after all Lily, she was your best friend. Your best friend that you abandoned as well as the rest of us. I hope you come anyway; it would be nice to see you again, and find out what's new with you.

Alice

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Lily was overcome with grief. Her best friend from school was dead. Isabelle was gone. She was the one person that helped her through everything, she was there when Lily was sad or depressed, and Lily was there for her, until she moved. Tears rolled down her cheeks as she collapsed into a chair at the table. She made an instant decision that she was going back. The thought terrified her. What would people say when she returned? Would James be there? How could she face him, and all her other friends? Nonetheless, she was going back. She left the letter on the table and went to her room. A trunk sat at the foot of her bed, with Lily Evans etched into the lid. She unlocked the padlock on it and slowly pulled the lid up. To the ordinary person, the contents of the trunk would be totally strange, but to Lily, they contained memories of a life she had long forgotten. In her trunk (which was bewitched to fit all her magical possessions), Lily found her old robes from school, the Gryffindor crest on the left side, her school books, worn and faded from many readings, her shimmering emerald green dress robes, the ones that Isabelle insisted Lily buy, and other things. The last thing she found right away was the one thing that was essential to ever witch and wizard, her wand. Lily held it in her hand, staring at it, thinking of all the spells that she did with it. She pointed it at something at the very bottom that she couldn't make out what it was and said,

"Accio object!" The object lifted into the air and came towards her. As it got closer, Lily noticed it was a book. When it reached her hand, she saw it was a photo album. Lily dreaded looking in it, but something in her told her to. She opened the front cover and saw pictures of her family. They were muggle pictures, so they didn't move. There were baby pictures, pictures of her parents, and pictures of Lily and her sister, Petunia. In every picture of the two of them, both looked as though it pained them to be within a hundred feet of each other, which was true. Lily closed the photo album and put it aside. She pulled out a suitcase and started packing clothes for a week. She then called the airport and got a flight to London. She needed some time to herself before seeing everyone again. After a phone call to work, a note left for Ally and a long drive to the airport, Lily was on her way back home.

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Once over the "pond" (Atlantic Ocean), Lily took out her photo album and opened it up past the muggle pictures. The first one she saw was of her and Isabelle their sixth year.

"Oh come on, Lils, why won't you go out with James?"

"The better question is why would I? Seriously, he is the most arrogant, conceited guy I have ever met."

"Try to look past it."

"Yeah right, `Belle. It's not gonna happen."

"You never know, Lily, stranger things have happened," Isabelle said.

"Not to me."

"Mark my words, Miss Evans, I bet you might be Mrs. James Potter someday."

"God help me if I do."

"Try this, Lils, try to look past his flaws, and look at the good things, I assure you there is more good than bad in him. Now his right hand man is another story." Lily laughed.

"I guess that's one good thing about James, he's not Black, that's for sure."

"About who?"

"James."

"Oh my God, the world is coming to an end, Lily used Potter's first name! I'm surprised you even know it."

"Shut up. See, why can't James be more like…like Remus, why can't he be sweet and kind like him?"

"Give him a chance, he might be. You don't know the James Potter with a girlfriend when you are the girlfriend."

"Are you ever going to give up on me?"

"I'll be trying to get you two together till the day I die." Lily laughed at her best friend and shook her head.

It brought tears to Lily's eyes to remember Isabelle, but she turned the page and saw a picture of her and James. Lily was sitting on James' lap on one of the squashy armchairs in the common room. James was leaning back against the chair and Lily was leaning against him. James' arms were wrapped around his girlfriend, and he kissed her on the cheek, and she grinned innocently. Lily looked closely and saw the Head Boy and Girl badges pinned to their robes, and it brought another memory to mind.

Lily walked down the hallway of the train to the Head Boy and Girl compartment, eager to see who the new Head Boy, for she had no idea who it was. She figured someone like Remus, but the last person she expected to see…

"Potter! What the hell are you doing here?" James looked up at Lily and pointed at his Head Boy badge.

"But, no, why are you Head Boy?" James shrugged.

"I dunno."

"Honestly, what is wrong with Dumbledore, seriously."

"When you've gotten over the shock of me being Head Boy Evans, we have prefects to order around."

"We don't order them around…"

"Well, whatever you want to call it then."

"I can't believe I have to spend the entire year with you. Nothing good will come out of this, I guarantee it."

"Ah, you never know Evans, something good might come out of it."

"I'm not going out with you, Potter. This no is the answer to every time you ask me this year, ok?" James laughed.

"What if you change your mind?"

"It'll never happen."

As the memory went through Lily's head, she smiled at her stupidity, and how ironic it was that she would say those things, for later that year, before Christmas, she was going out with James. The next picture Lily looked at was of her and Sirius. They were asleep, leaning against each other for support. Suddenly, James came into the picture with a mock angry look on his face and started yelling at Sirius. Both of them jerked awake, and Sirius gave a wicked grin and said something. It made Lily laugh and she turned and threw her arms around Sirius' neck and gave him a kiss on the cheek. Sirius said something again, and kissed her on the cheek too. The look on James' face was priceless. He had a look on his face of anger and jealousy. All of this was in good fun; it was just like every other time. Sirius and Remus would always pretend to try and steal Lily away from James. Lily couldn't help laughing out loud at this picture. A man across the aisle looked up at her and threw her a dirty look, but she didn't care.

Lily started dozing off, barely being able to keep her eyes open. She was trying to stay sitting up, but gravity was taking its toll on her. It was 3:30 in the morning, and she was in a spare classroom with James, Sirius and Remus, all were practicing for the exam the next morning. Lily had closed her eyes and she heard someone sit next to her. She opened her eyes and saw Sirius next to her.

"Lils, I'll lean against you and you lean against me, and we'll sleep for a few minutes." Lily was too tired to answer with words.

"Mmm hmm." She and Sirius were leaning against each other, and as soon as they were both about ready to fall asleep, they heard,

"Padfoot! What the hell are you doing with my girlfriend?!" Sirius grinned wickedly.

"Slowly making my move, Prongs. I always told you that she'd be better off with me." Both he and Lily laughed. Lily sat up and turned her body around and wrapped her arms around Sirius' neck and gave him a kiss on the cheek, and leaned her head on his shoulder. Sirius' grin grew wider.

"See, she agrees too." James fought hard to keep a straight face, but couldn't hold it anymore. All three of them burst into laughter.

The memory of Sirius brought back another one, his conversation with her two days before she left for America.

"Lils."

"I'm not in the mood for a lecture, Black." Sirius' eyes narrowed slightly. She hadn't called him by his last name in a long time.

"I need to talk to you. Or rather, I'm going to talk to you, whether you like it or not."

"I don't want to hear it." She said shortly.

"Well you're going to hear it!" He snapped. Lily looked at him narrowing her eyes at him in anger

"Well, let's hear it then!"

"Why are you leaving?" Sirius' tone suddenly changed to a sober one. Lily sighed.

"I want to get out of here. I'm tired of it all."

"All what?"

"Everything."

"Why did you break up with James, from what I've heard, he proposed?"

"It's all moving too fast, Sirius, I'm just two months out of school, I don't want to be getting married already and be tied down right away."

"Lily, listen to me, and keep this in mind when you leave. If you leave, you're throwing away happiness with both hands. This is your home, you belong with James."

"I can't." Lily choked out, her eyes welling up with tears.

"I'm sorry Sirius, but I can't stay here anymore." Sirius slowly nodded, and turned to leave. Before he left, he said,

"You know, I really thought you would be the one who James ended up marrying. You two fit so well together." Lily inhaled a ragged breath, the tears streaming down her cheeks.

"Please go, Sirius." Sirius nodded, and left. Lily sobbed, why did he have to make her feel so guilty? He always had a way of doing that. Of all of James' friends, Sirius was the one she would miss the most. He was the one who was most like James, and he always sided with her on everything. She liked Remus and Peter too, but they weren't the same. Remus was more like her, a prefect, smart and down to earth, and she didn't really know Peter all that well. Their seventh year Peter seemed aloof, he didn't hang out with the rest of the Marauders as much as he used to. She hated to leave them all deep down, but she knew she had to get out.

Lily flipped the page and saw a picture of herself sitting with Isabelle, James, Sirius, and Remus in the Gryffindor Common Room. They were talking about random stuff, whatever came to mind. Lily remembered one topic of conversation and it brought a smile to her face.

"Ok, Lils, James, if you two ever have kids, what would you name them?" Lily and James looked at each other and shrugged.

"We hadn't really talked too much about it."

"Knowing James he'll want a James Jr. for a boy or Jamie for a girl," Remus said.

"You say it like that's a bad thing," James said.

"I'm not naming my son James Jr."

"Why, what's wrong with it?"

"Everything." Sirius stretched in his chair and said,

"Yeah, she wants to name her son Sirius Jr., right?"

"Oh yeah," Lily said sarcastically.

"See Prongs, you gotta give her options she'll like, I mean, who would name their kid James? I mean, come on." James was going to say his comeback, but Lily spoke first.

"Actually, I was thinking about if it's a boy, to name him Harry James, and if it's a girl, Faith Gabrielle."

"Harry James Potter," James said, trying the name out, "I like it." Lily grinned and said,

"Wait, wait, who said his last name would be Potter?" James pretended to be shocked.

"Yeah, James, what if she wants his last name to be Black or Lupin, or something?" Isabelle said.

"Yeah, what if I do?" Both Sirius and Remus grinned and put their arms around Lily, and stopped quickly when they realized that they both were going to do the same thing. They stared at each other, as if saying, `We can't both have her,' then Sirius said,

"Rock paper scissors." Isabelle laughed and said,

"Ah, rock paper scissors, the solution to all the Marauder's decisions." Sirius nodded and said,

"Damn straight." Remus and Sirius put their fists into their palms.

"One, two, three." Sirius had rock, Remus had paper.

"How do you always win?"

"You always pick rock."

"Ok, best two outta three."

"Nope, I won." Remus put his arm around Lily.

"Fine, then I get Isabelle."

"No thanks, Sirius," Isabelle said, and grinned as a thought came to mind and she went and sat on Remus' other side. Sirius and James looked at each other and Sirius said,

"This isn't right."

Lily looked at more pictures and one made the smile on her face disappear instantly. It was a picture of her and James, the last night they were a couple. James was on one knee, getting ready to propose.

"Lils, can I talk with you?"

"Of course."

"Want to go for a walk?"

"Alright." They walked in silence for a few moments, until Lily said,

"What did you want to talk to me about, James?" She noticed that James wasn't his usual self; something was bothering him and making him nervous.

"What is it, James?"

"Lily I want to ask you something, but I'm not entirely sure how to do it."

"Just come out and say it."

"It's not that simple."

"Well, what's so difficult about it, James, just tell me what you want to say."

"Ok, here it goes." He got down on one knee, and pulled a small velvet box out of his pocket. Lily's jaw dropped.

"Lily, ever since I met you that one day on the Hogwarts Express when we were eleven, I knew I loved you. And I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you someday. So, Lily, will you marry me?" He opened the box to reveal a beautiful ring with an emerald in the center, with diamonds on either side of it. Lily's expression was hard to read. She reached down and took James' hands and pulled him up. She closed the box and said,

"I'm sorry, James, I can't." Clearly it had not been the answer James was expecting.

"Why can't you?"

"This is all too fast, I…"

"Ok, I understand, I agree, we are only seventeen, maybe in a few years we can get married…"

"No, James."

"What?"

"No, I can't marry you at all. Life with you would keep me tied down here, I want to get out into the world and see things. I'm tired of staying in England. I want to go to America or something."

"Well, we can go to America, or anywhere you want, I don't care, as long as we're together."

"No, I can't ask you to leave everything and everyone."

"But it's ok for you to do it?"

"It's different with me James."

"How is it different with you?"

"I wouldn't affect people as much as you."

"Shut up, you have an affect on people, Lily, more than you know."

"Yeah right."

"Do you want me to name names? I can tell you of so many people that would hate it if you leave."

"No, you don't need to. James, you're asking me to marry you without looking around yet. You haven't met any girl outside of Hogwarts. If I say yes, and you might meet someone else and regret proposing to me."

"There's no other girl for me but you, Lils."

"I'm sorry, James, but I can't marry you." With that, she ran back to the castle, trying to keep from crying. As soon as she got inside the entrance hall, she leaned against the wall and broke into sobs. She couldn't get the look on James' face out of her head when she told him she couldn't marry him.

The memory of the last time she saw James brought tears to Lily's eyes. She closed her photo album and the seat belt light came on, and the plane began its descent. A woman's voice came over the intercom,

"Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to London, England. We will be landing in a few moments time. Please exit the plane once it has stopped and parked. Have a nice day."

`I'll try.' Lily thought to herself.

A/N: A good stopping spot. Hope you enjoy. I know I didn't have ten reviews like I had hoped, but oh well. Thank you SO much to all of you who reviewed, and I hope you keep it up!!

Husker_fan_2006


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