Chapter 5: Missing You
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Life is a road
And I want to keep going
Love is a river
I wanna keep flowing
Life is a road
Now and forever
Wonderful journey
I'll be there when the world stops turning
I'll be there when the storm is through
In the end I wanna be standing
At the beginning with you
- `At the Beginning' by Richard Marx and Donna Lewis from the movie Anastasia
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It was turning out to be one of the longest weeks of Harry's life. He hadn't realized how much he was beginning to depend on Hermione until she left. And he had no idea how much Teddy had become attached to her in the week that he had been living with them. Teddy cried more often, slept less, and his hair was never orange anymore. Harry was becoming more and more frustrated as the week went on, wishing Hermione was back to make Teddy happy. Hell, it would make Harry happy too; he was just realizing how much he missed having Hermione in the house. Not only for the help with the baby, but the companionship, the talks over dinner, putting Teddy down for the night, or even just spending time in the living room, reading or watching TV, even if they didn't talk. And now she was gone, and it was only Tuesday. She'd only been gone two days. Harry sighed as he changed Teddy's diaper. This was going to be a long week. He tickled Teddy's foot after the baby was clean and dry and in a fresh diaper. Teddy kicked his foot and squirmed, but didn't laugh. Harry really wished Hermione was back. Though the week was different, it was by no means uneventful. Luckily no one had noticed Hermione was gone, but the hate mail that came for both of them Harry threw away without reading them, tossing them into the fire. Thankfully it was nothing that would blow up when coming in contact with flames. Not much was said since the article, but Harry wasn't about to forget about it, especially when Ron came to visit him the day after Hermione had left for Australia. Ron apparated into the living room with a `pop', causing Harry, who was sitting in the chair reading about childhood diseases, to jump.
Ron offered no greeting or preamble, just asked rudely, "Where is she?"
"Well, hello to you too, Ron."
"Don't give me lectures, Harry, where is Hermione?"
"She's not here."
"Of course she's here, she's always here. She's not at her flat, so therefore she's here." `So Hermione didn't inform the boyfriend about her trip then. That was thoughtful of her,' Harry thought with a little bitterness.
"Well, Hermione has a life outside her flat and this house, Ron. There's hundreds of places she could be besides here."
"But she's not; I know she's here, Harry. Now where is she?"
"I told you, she's not here."
"Then where is she?"
"She's in Australia with her parents. She's lifting the memory charm and bringing them back to England. Here, sit down, I'll get you a drink." Harry set his book aside to get up.
"Don't give me that, Harry. Don't even try to pretend to be a good friend. Apparently you've been backstabbing me for months."
"What are you talking about?"
"The article!"
"That's what this is all about? You want to see Hermione about the article?"
"Yes."
"You honestly believe that Rita Skeeter rubbish?"
"It explains a hell of a lot that's been going on lately with Hermione. Why she's been so distant to me, why she doesn't want to marry me. It's all because of you."
"Hermione doesn't want to marry you now because of Hermione. I have nothing to do with it. If you would just talk to her, actually listen to her, she'd be able to explain everything to you." Ron scoffed. "Look, who are you going to believe, your friends of seven years or a reporter who specializes in ruining people's lives?" Ron glared at his friend.
"Considering how honest you've both been with all of us lately, I'll take the reporter," Ron said scornfully.
"Well, I'm sorry you feel that way, Ron."
"Let me know when she gets back."
"So you can treat her like this or worse? Not bloody likely Ron." With one last glare, Ron Disapparated.
"Hope he leaves a fingernail behind again," Harry muttered bitterly. He glanced hopefully at the spot where Ron disappeared from, and was disappointed that there wasn't anything left behind. Then he mentally kicked himself for the wicked thought. But then, he shouldn't feel guilty, it was Ron that was being the jerk, not him. Ron who chose to believe Rita Skeeter of all people instead of his two best friends. Well, if that was the case, then vindictive thoughts about hoping Ron splinched didn't seem so bad.
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On Wednesday, Harry made sure he remembered to give Teddy his Wolfsbane potion. But remembering to give the child the potion was the easy part, getting him to take it was a different story. Harry recalled in his third year when he saw Remus take the potion he said sugar made it useless, and that it was horrible tasting. And it was a lot simpler for a grown man to take it, someone who was able to understand and make himself drink the potion, than for a small baby to drink it. For once Teddy drank a little, he refused to swallow and burst into tears, and hollered at the top of his lungs in protest. Harry tried to sooth him while trying to get him to drink, but the baby refused.
"Come on, Teddy, you have to drink this, if you hate this now, you're going to hate it a lot worse next week." The baby cried more. Harry was beginning to get frustrated, willing himself not to lose his temper. Harry didn't know how he did it, but eventually after a good half hour or so, he finally got Teddy to finish the potion, though the child still wasn't happy.
"You'll thank me later," Harry said laying Teddy down for a nap after he burped him. Teddy stopping hollering, but sniffled and hiccupped as his cries started to subside. Harry sat down in the rocking chair next to Teddy's crib to wait for him to fall asleep. Slowly, the baby started to doze off, and so did Harry. It wasn't long before he was dreaming.
"Answer me! Where did you get this sword?"
"We found it-we found it-PLEASE!" A terrible, drawn out scream filled Harry's ears and he knew it was Hermione. She was being tortured, and he couldn't get there to help. His hands were bound and he couldn't move. But Luna was there, she had a nail to cut the ropes, where was she? Where was Ron, he was shouting for Hermione when they were down in the cellar. But there was no one, Harry was all alone, alone, and unable to help his friend who was screaming in pain from the Cruciatus Curse.
"What else did you take from the vault? ANSWE R ME!" Hermione screamed again, and this time she fell silent, and Harry could hear Bellatrix's evil cackle above him. Harry jerked awake. He stared at the ceiling and put a hand to his forehead before running it through his hair. He had never had a dream about the time at Malfoy Manor before; his dreams of last year were of the last few minutes there in the forest, or some variation of it. Harry closed his eyes. He could still hear Hermione's screams in his head. He leaned his head back in the chair and before long was falling asleep again.
Harry and Hermione left the cemetery, arms still around each other. Instead of meeting with Bathilda, they Apparated back to the tent. A few minutes later, the Polyjuice Potion wore off, and Hermione had curled up on a couch, pulling out the book that Dumbledore gave her and began her routine of trying to figure what it all meant. Finally sighing in frustration, she slammed the book shut and set it on the floor. Harry smiled as he took a seat beside her.
"Something troubling you Hermione?"
"No, I'm tired of reading."
"Wow, there's a sentence I never thought I'd hear escape your lips." Hermione gave him a sarcastic `aren't you funny?' look. Harry's smile left his face and he said soberly, "You're getting frustrated too with this, aren't you?" Hermione sighed.
"I wish we had more leads as to where the rest of the Horcruxes could be, but I'm not going to give up. They're out there, and we'll find them. I'm sure of it."
"You know you don't have to stay, you can go be with Ron if you like. I won't stop you, or beg you to stay."
"I'm not going anywhere, Harry. I told you I'd help you as much as I could, and I'm not one to go back on my promises." They were silent for a moment before Hermione spoke again. "I hate Ron for what he did. That he gave up. I don't think I'll ever be able to forgive him for that," she shrugged. "And if I ever see him again, he probably won't forgive me for staying with you, either, so it's all right." Harry gave her a disbelieving look.
"You don't mean that."
"Yeah, I do. But it's alright; I'd rather stay with you than be with him any day." Harry's eyes widened and he looked at Hermione in surprise. She was looking back at him with a soft smile on her face. He swallowed nervously.
"R-Really?" She nodded.
"Really," Hermione slid closer, and Harry swallowed nervously again. They were leaning closer; the rational part of Harry's brain that told him this was wrong shut off, all that he thought about was the witch in front of him. They were even closer, her eyes had fluttered shut. Even closer now, their lips were just millimeters apart…
Harry's eyes flew open and he practically vaulted from the chair. He was breathing fast as though he had just run a marathon. What the hell was that about? That was a dream that definitely never happened, that dream scared him more than the previous one. Why was he dreaming about kissing Hermione? Was it the fact that the entire wizarding world was now thinking that kisses happened between them all the time and more than kisses? That's what it was, Harry concluded, it was something to do with the article. He shook his head. That didn't make any sense, but he wanted it to, because if it wasn't the reason, then it meant that things were a lot more complicated than he'd like to think about. As his breathing slowed down, he ran his hands through his hair. He took a deep breath and glanced at the sleeping baby in his crib. He still looked like he was doing all right, so Harry took the baby monitor and went downstairs, almost deathly afraid to fall asleep again.
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The rest of the week passed by without much excitement, not much more followed up on the Rita Skeeter article, and Harry hadn't had any weird dreams since that one night. Sunday crept by at snail speed, twice Harry had to check the clocks to see if they were still working. Hermione had sent him an owl earlier in the week saying she'd be home Sunday around six. The memory charm was lifted without any complications, and both her parents were doing fine and remembered everything. She was going to get them settled in and would be by to see them around six. Harry glanced at the clock in the living room again. 5:56. Hermione would be there in less than five minutes. Harry began pacing, Teddy's eyes following him back and forth. The child had been very good that day; he seemed to have sensed the happiness in his adoptive father's attitude and was mostly all smiles. He brought his feet up and put one in his mouth, still keeping his eyes on Harry. All of a sudden, Teddy kicked his feet down and giggled. Harry stopped pacing and looked at his godson with curiosity.
"Are you laughing at me, Teddy? Huh?" Teddy just kicked his feet, still grinning. Harry reached into the playpen and tickled Teddy's side sending the baby into fits of giggles. Harry laughed in response. "I just can't get over how ticklish you are, kid." He tickled him again. Just then, Harry heard a `pop' of apparation and saw Hermione standing in the living room door. She smiled and gave a cheerful `hi'.
Giving Harry a hug, Hermione said, "How're you?"
"Fine," Harry replied, a little higher than usual as the memory of his dream came rushing back to him. A flicker of confusion crossed Hermione's face but disappeared as she leaned down and picked up Teddy.
"And how's this little guy? Did you behave for Harry this week?" Teddy grinned and his hair turned his happy color orange. Hermione laughed.
"Well, someone's in a good mood." Harry stepped closer to the two and gave Teddy his finger to hold onto.
"That's the first time he's had orange hair all week. Almost like he hasn't been happy since you left." Hermione shook her head.
"I'm sure he's been happy with you, Harry, it's not just with me."
"Well, he definitely wasn't happy on Wednesday. That was a nightmare."
"Oh, the potion?"
Harry nodded, "He does not like that one bit."
"Well, I'm sure it must taste terrible. And you can't add sugar or anything to it." She planted a kiss on Teddy's forehead. "But you'll be thanking him later, won't you?" Teddy squirmed, trying to kick his feet. Hermione set him back in his playpen where he went to kicking happily again, and she sat down on the couch. Harry about sat next to her but stopped himself, thinking of that dream again. He instead sat on the loveseat across the coffee table from her.
"So how was the trip?"
"It was good. It was good to get away for a little while. Once I had been there for a few days I realized it was stupid of me to run like that, that's exactly what everyone's been accusing me of doing, and here I go and do it. But, I found Mum and Dad the second day, they ended up setting up a dental branch there in Sydney, and are keeping it even though they're back in London. It took an hour to reverse the memory charm, and when they remembered me, I filled them in on all that happened, that the war was over, and they could move back home. We spent the rest of the week traveling all over the city; they showed me all the sights and everything. They were really glad to be back home, though." A sudden thought hit Harry, and he didn't know why he never asked Hermione it before.
"Hermione, what are your parents' names? I don't think in the seven years I've known you, I've heard what their names are. I've never really thought about it until now." Hermione thought about it, and then laughed.
"No, I guess you haven't. You've never really been introduced to them, have you?"
"No, I just saw them at Diagon Alley that one time and at King's Cross when they would pick you up from school."
"Yeah, I suppose so. Well, my Dad's name is David, or Dave, and my Mum's name is Jane."
"I see. I'll have to remember that."
"Yeah, you'd better, because I told them all about Teddy and they want to see him. They'll be here in a few weeks; they want to get everything settled first before they do a lot of visiting." Hermione looked over at Teddy, who was playing with his toes and smiled softly at him.
"I missed you two this week, though it was nice to be able to sleep through the night without having to wake up for three a.m. feedings, or something like that."
"Yeah, we missed you too; it was kind of boring without you."
"You know I was thinking this week, what are you going to have him call you when he starts talking? Because whatever you choose, we need to start referring to yourself as that, so when he does talk, he says it."
"I don't know, I hadn't thought of it. What kind of name do you call a godfather? I just called Sirius by his first name."
"Yeah, but Sirius wasn't your adoptive father. You're Teddy's." The phrase `adoptive father' took Harry by surprise, he hadn't thought of himself as that, just as Teddy's godfather.
"So…should he call me Dad or something?"
"Only if you want him to."
"That would be weird at first, having him call me Dad. I mean, I'm not his father."
"I know. But a lot of parents that adopt children have the child call them Mum and Dad, but most keep the real parents in mind so that they're not forgotten. So the child knows where he or she came from." Harry nodded but didn't say anything else. Hermione said, "Think about it," and changing the subject she said, "So, anything exciting happen this week?"
"Ron stopped by. He was looking for you." Hermione rolled her eyes.
"What'd he want?"
"He seems to be under the impression that I've stabbed in the back, stole his girlfriend, and am the reason why you don't want to marry him. He believes every word of Rita's article." Hermione angrily sighed.
"The prat. Did you tell him when I was coming back?"
"No. But he wanted me to let him know when you got here though."
"I'll go see him tomorrow. I don't want to, but I have to."
"You don't?"
"No, it's just…I'm tired of fighting with him. I've been fighting with him for almost seven years. For a while, like through all last year, he was nice-different. I thought he had grown up and we weren't going to fight as much anymore, but now his insecurity rubbish is coming back, and he's being paranoid again."
"It was the book."
"Book? What book?"
"The Twelve Fail-Safe Ways to Charm Witches, the twins gave it to him for his seventeenth birthday, and he gave me a copy of it for mine. That's why he was different; he was following the instructions in that book."
"What kind of instructions were there? What did it say about how to charm witches?"
"I don't know, I haven't read it yet. I never had time." Hermione sighed.
"Well, I guess you can't blame him for trying, even if it only lasted for so long." Harry nodded, and the conversation ceased between the two friends, neither knowing what to say next.
"Oh!" Hermione said as a thought just came to her. "I got Teddy a gift." She began digging through the little handbag that she toted all their belongings in while they were searching for Horcruxes.
"What'd you get him? It's not a book, is it?"
"What makes you think it's a book?"
"Because it probably is, and I know you, books make great gifts." Hermione gave Harry an annoyed look, and pulled Teddy's present out of her purse. Harry was right, it was a book.
"I knew it. So which one is it? Hogwarts, A History? Or Magical Beasts and Where to Find Them? Standard Book of Spells Grade 1? Going to start him early on his magical training before he can talk?" Harry asked teasingly. Clearly it wasn't any of those; the book was only a few pages long and was very colorful. Hermione rolled her eyes.
"Honestly, Harry, do you really think Hogwarts, A History would be this thin?"
"I don't know. It could be the child version, complete with pictures." Hermione shook her head.
"No, for your information, Harry, it's a picture book of one my favorite stories when I was small. It's a muggle story, of course, but it's still a classic." She held it up for Harry to see the title that read, Peter Pan. Harry heard of the story, though never hearing the whole thing firsthand, only bits and pieces after hearing Aunt Petunia read it to Dudley.
"Think he'll like it?" Hermione said, opening the cover and glancing through the pages.
"I'm sure he will."
That evening, as Harry was heading up to bed, he heard Hermione's voice in Teddy's room across the hall from Harry's bedroom. She was putting him down for the night, and was going to read his new book to him.
"Hey there, little squirt. You want to read a story? I think you'll like this one; it's always been one of my favorites." Harry glanced into the room and saw Hermione sitting in the rocking chair, Teddy in her lap, rapt at attention at the colorful book in front of him.
"You ready? Alright, let's turn the page here. `All children grow up, except one-`"
`That's too bad,' Harry thought. Because he would rather Teddy stay that size always, so there could be moments like those forever.
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A/N: Here's chapter 5 everyone! Hope you enjoyed it, a little H/Hr fluff I guess you could call it. The end to this chapter was kind of cheesy, but cheesy is good. I like cheesy. As to a preview for next chapter…I'll give you the title, it's called A New Career and Baby Werewolf Adventures. So you can probably guess what's going to happen in the next chapter!! TTYL! Thanks for reading!!
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