Author's Note: Thank you again for the lovely reviews! I want to remind everyone that this story is rated PG-13 so I hope that helps you understand I do not intend to go into any graphic details. Please, keep reading and keep reviewing and tell all your friends!
WARNING: This chapter contains mention of a possible sexual assault. Please stop reading if this makes you uncomfortable in any way.
Ron followed the professor to Madame Pomfrey's office mutely. He had never expected the night to turn out like this. The idea that....that Hermione...His stomach rolled again and he had to push the thought out of his mind for now. Seeing her lying on the ground, broken and beaten...everything had changed then. The last few weeks were gone. Insignificant. Childish and forgotten. He couldn't even remember right now what they had been fighting about.
And he didn't think he could have felt anything right then if he had tried. He was numb. His hands didn't even seem as if they were still attached to his body and there was a high pitched buzzing sound in his head. He didn't know how long he stood in front of the healer's desk before something broke through.
"...easley....Mister Weasley!" came the shrill voice of Professor McGonagall, drawing him back to the present.
"Uh....sorry. I'm sorry professor...I..." he gulped and went to run a nervous hand through his hair but stopped short when he saw the remains of his fight with McLaggen all over them.
McGonagall noticed and pushed him into the nearest chair before performing a cleaning charm and something else he wasn't familiar with but a pleasant warmth seeped through the hands he hadn't known were throbbing in pain although still bruised and torn. "I'm not as proficient as Madame Pomfrey, but that should do for now." she said tersely.
He waited expectantly for her dressing down. Dead or not, his actions were still about as bad as one could do at Hogwarts. He fully expected to have his wand broken and be thrown in Azkaban. But oddly enough he didn't care and if given the chance he wouldn't change a thing.
"I need you to tell me where this occurred. We will need to see to Mister McLaggen's bod...." she stopped herself and started again "He is still a student here and until we determine the reason behind this attack we will not deny him assistance."
Ron did his best to tell her where it had happened without having to pull out the Marauder's Map.
"Thank you, Mister Weasley. The Headmaster should be here shortly. I will go see to Mister McLaggen."
"Professor, you should know. There was a message left on the wall. Left for Harry." Ron couldn't meet her eyes
"What did the message say?" she inquired
"I can't...I can't..." Ron stuttered. Reading it once had been bad enough, to have to repeat it....he just couldn't.
"Very well." she said understandingly
Finally he had to ask "Professor, what's going to happen to me?"
"This is war, Mister Weasley. And we do not yet know the state of Mister McLaggen." she said in the kindest tone he had ever heard her use with him before "There is a muggle expression, I believe it is `Don't borrow trouble'." she put a hand on his shoulder as she passed him "Stay with your friends."
As soon as she was out of sight he walked back into the main area of the infirmary. The curtains Harry had conjured were still shut tight and he couldn't hear anything coming from behind them.
He drug a chair from a nearby bed and sat it right next to the entrance to the makeshift room. Ron pulled his wand and slumped into the seat, keeping his promise to Harry to stand guard.
The longer he sat the more his thoughts tumbled around in his head. And the growing wave of guilt was threatening to overtake him. If he had just followed them when he had first seen them none of this would have happened. Hermione wouldn't have been hurt. Angry tears clouded his vision and he wanted to do nothing more than the stalk up and down the floor, but he had told Harry he would stay right there and he didn't intend to ever let them down again.
He had fixed his gaze resolutely on the floor in front of him, hazy from the tears he refused to allow himself to shed. And then suddenly his field of vision was broken by the embroidered hem of the headmaster's robes.
"Ronald." his voice said gently "I would like to see Harry and Miss Granger."
Ron nodded absently but still the headmaster didn't make a move.
"If you would be so kind as to lower your wand, Mister Weasley." he said and Ron realized that he did indeed have his wand pointed at Albus Dumbledore.
Dropping it like a hot rock Ron began to sputter out an apology but was cut off "Never apologize for protecting your friends." and Ron got the impression he wasn't just talking about the wand incident.
But before he crossed behind the curtain he turned back. "You should know, Mister McLaggen is still with us." and Ron let out a breath he didn't even know he had been holding.
Ron nodded his understanding and collapsed back into the chair feeling like a puppet who's strings had been cut.
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Harry heard Ron and the professor exit but he couldn't say that he saw them. He wasn't sure he was seeing anything right then. Madame Pomfrey continued to work behind him. He would occasionally hear her tut or mutter something under her breath and the clink of potion bottles but he never turned around.
The conversation he had overheard earlier between Snape and Malfoy didn't matter anymore. Nothing mattered except ending this. He had known for sure since the end of last year that it was going to be up to him to take down Voldemort but he always thought he would have more time. This...hurting Hermione to hurt him...it had gone too far, too soon.
He was waging an internal battle. One side of him was suddenly seeing things clearly, seeing the big picture and the ramifications of what Voldemort in power would mean. Taking the time to enact an effective counter attack seemed like the most logical choice. And then the other side of him wanted to do nothing less than wipe McLaggen and Malfoy and every other Death Eater along with their master off the face of the earth. And that side didn't want to wait.
And then a voice rose up in him and reminded him that neither of those things mattered until Hermione was whole again.
The last four months had been so strained for them. With Hermione and Ron fighting so much he didn't want to take sides but it was hard to keep things going as normal. The damn potions book didn't help either. He knew Hermione didn't approve of him using the notes written in the margins and his newfound proficiency had also seemed to rub her the wrong way. He'd throw the book away in a second now if it would make her better.
They hadn't felt like them in a long time. He couldn't remember the last time they hung out without there being tension of some sort. Rubbing his temple he sighed heavily. It seemed so pointless now. Such a waste of time. He had been so distracted by his suspicions of Malfoy he had let everything else fall by the wayside.
A memory from earlier in the evening surfaced and he had to take his glasses off and push the heel of his palms into his eyes to keep from completely losing it. Suddenly he felt like he couldn't breathe. The formal tie and his tightly buttoned shirt were constricting his throat. He pulled angrily at the bow and let it hang lose around his neck and practically ripped the top button of the shirt off in his haste. All he could see was Hermione standing in front of him, flustered and nervous and trying to hide from McLaggen. If only he had pressed her, had insisted she stay with him then maybe none of this would have happened. But he had been too preoccupied and too irritated with her over her actions to do that. Instead he had abandoned her and let that monster beat her within an inch of her life and do....No. He had to stop before he lost control again.
Without even realizing it, Harry had begun to pace the small space at the foot of the bed like a caged lion, wand in one hand, glasses dangling in the other.
A soft clearing of a throat let him know they were no longer alone and in an instant he spun and his wand was already lit with a curse before he recognized the intruder as Albus Dumbledore.
"That is the second time I've been at the end of a student's wand in the last few minutes." he said cryptically before stepping closer to the healer. "How is she, Poppy?" he asked, voice now grave.
Harry turned to the bed and saw that Hermione was now under the covers. The blood had been cleaned from her head and face but there was still bruising along her cheekbone.
"She'll live." she said succinctly and Harry felt his knees immediately go weak. "There was considerable bruising. She had some broken bones, ribs mostly, but they have been mended. Cutting charms were used to inflict pain." the disgust in her voice was evident "The worst of the damage is from the use of the cruciatas curse." and Harry's hand clenched so tightly around his wand he could have sworn he heard the wood begin to protest.
The nurse looked up at him for the first time since she had begun speaking "As you know, Mister Potter, there is not much I can do for that." Harry nodded blindly, horrorstruck that Hermione had been in such terrible pain.
"I have determined that she was given a potion that would have weakened her and eventually left her paralyzed. Only a few drops would have been necessary."
It took everything Harry had not to find what was left of McLaggen and destroy it. She had been awake and helpless while he had done...
There was one thing that she hadn't mentioned yet.
"Was she raped?" the words burst from his mouth so quickly he couldn't have stopped them if he had tried. He instantly wished he could take them back.
Madame Pomfrey exchanged a hesitant look with the headmaster and did not answer him until he nodded his consent. "No."
And with that one word his entire body felt like it had deflated, if Dumbledore had not hastily conjured a chair behind him he would have ended up on the ground.
He sat forward, head hanging between his knees taking big gulping gasps of air, relief flowing through him. When he had recovered he replaced his glasses and turned his attention back to the others.
"Thats not to say there wasn't an attempt." she said slowly and his eyes went wild "You must understand, we do not know what Miss Granger's mental state will be when she wakes up. She may not wish to have you here." the delivery was gentle but Harry got the message.
"Oh...of course...I mean...I don't want to do anything that would upset her or....or hurt her...or..." he stammered and took a moment to compose himself "But I'm not leaving her alone." he said, his voice stronger "Someone is trying to hurt her to get to me and I'm not going to allow that to happen again.
"Harry. You must know this was not your fault." the headmaster began but Harry jumped up and resumed his pacing.
"The message was meant for me! All of this-" he said vehemently, throwing his arms wide, "is because of me! No more!"
At Harry's outburst Ron stuck his head inside, wand out. "Everything ok, Harry?" he asked
Harry nodded and tried to calm himself down.
"Mister Weasley, why don't you join us." and it was not lost on Dumbledore that he looked at Harry for confirmation before fully entering.
"We found Mister McLaggen where you left him." the headmaster began, choosing to ignore Ron's twitch. "He is still alive." this information was for Harry's benefit and he shot Ron a relieved look, not for McLaggen's sake, but for Ron's.
"Due to the...circumstances I chose to heal him as best I could and detain him elsewhere for now." Harry noticed that Dumbledore deliberately did not say where McLaggen was being detained.
"We will need to talk to him further when he comes round again but I will have to say that I believe Mister McLaggen was under the Imperious curse."
Harry let the information sink in for a moment. As much as he hated to admit it, it made sense. McLaggen was a right git but he had never come across as someone capable of doing something so terrible. "Do we know who was controlling him?" Harry asked, voice more sure than he actually felt.
"Not at the moment. But considering the nature of the message left, I don't think we would be remiss in assuming that Death Eaters are involved."
Harry nodded, scrubbing a tired hand across his face. He had his suspicions as to who could be behind this and Malfoy was at the top of the list but he knew he needed to bide his time and get some more evidence before saying anything. And he couldn't forget about needing to get the information about Voldemort out of Slughorn. But he was determined now to stop working alone.
Madame Pomfrey was now casting slightly perturbed glances at everyone surrounding the bed, including the headmaster. Before she could start issuing orders however, Dumbledore spoke up "I believe, since we as of yet do not know if Miss Granger is still in harm's way it would be beneficial to allow Misters Potter and Weasley to remain with her until she wakes up. After that it will be Miss Granger's decision as to whether you stay or not."
Harry shot him a grateful look and bobbed his head once to let him know he understood, glad that now he didn't have to challenge the nurse seeing as he had no intention of leaving.
"I must take my leave now--there are things to which I must attend." Dumbledore said, sounding much older than he usually did.
After he was gone and Madame Pomfrey had checked on Hermione one last time she gave the boys a glare, letting them know that she didn't exactly approve of what the headmaster had allowed.
"Let me know when she wakes up." she requested before leaving as well.
When it was just the three of them the silence stretched on. Finally Ron summoned the courage to speak. "So, how is she?"
Harry was quiet and Ron was about to repeat himself when he spoke "He crucio'd her."
The air was still until Ron put his foot through the chair next to him.
Again. Silence. Both fixedly watching her breathe, as if they could somehow will her back to consciousness.
Ron repaired the chair and turned it around to face the gap in the curtains and made sure he was securely seated. "Did he..." but he didn't even get to finish the question.
"No." Harry cut him off before he could finish and Ron allowed his head to drop back in silent thanks.
Harry brought the chair Dumbledore had conjured to the foot of her bed and sat, his wand laying across his right thigh.
They didn't say another word to each other, nothing needed to be said. They would stand sentry as long as was necessary.
Harry lost track of time. Eventually Ron stretched his long legs out in front of him, crossed his arms across his chest and fell asleep. But Harry couldn't. All he could do was watch her lay there, so still. He tried to let his mind go blank but he was unable to keep the nights events from playing on a continuous loop in his head.
Madame Pomfrey slipped in and out as the night wore on. Professor McGonagall came back as well, he could hear her softly whispering with the healer outside the curtains but she didn't come in. The only light in the space came from a bright moon shining through a high window but his eyes had adjusted. At some point Crookshanks had snuck in and jumped in Harry's lap, his squished face turned towards his mistress, joining their meager guard.
Harry himself was fighting sleep and was considering waking Ron up so he could nod off when he noticed movement coming from the bed.
Hermione's head was moving slowly, imperceptibly almost. He sat forward in his chair so quickly the half kneazle was dumped rather unceremoniously on the ground. With a disgruntled shake he stalked to the other side of the bed to watch.
He almost woke Ron but something he couldn't explain told him not to. He didn't want to scare her. Didn't want to make anything worse for her than it already was.
She groaned and moved her hand, her fingers clutching at the scratchy hospital blanket. Without thinking he reached out and wrapped his hand around hers. At his touch her eyes flew open and all he saw was her fear.
"Hermione! It's ok, you're safe." he said as quiet and gently as he could but he knew his voice sounded shaky
She didn't seem to hear him or understand what he was saying. Her eyes were wild, darting desperately around the small space until they landed on him.
"Hermione. It's me...it's Harry. You're ok now." he couldn't tear his gaze from hers and he saw as she finally heard him, finally realized where she was.
She opened her mouth but nothing came out at first. The lost look on her face was too much and he came to the edge of the bed, taking her hand again. "You're ok `Mione, I promise. We found you...Ron and I...we found you."
And then he witnessed something he hoped he never had to see again. He watched as she remembered. Everything. Her eyes filled with tears and her mouth opened and shut several times until finally a wail emerged.
He had never felt so helpless. He didn't know what to do. His entire world had narrowed to the girl breaking in front of him and he was at a complete loss.
She was curling in on herself, and had clenched on to his hand with more force than he had thought possible.
Out of the corner of his eye he saw Ron wake with start, limbs splaying so suddenly he almost ended up on the floor. He stood frantically, wand out, blinking rapidly until he saw that what had woken him was Hermione.
She was still making that horrific sound and Harry didn't know what to do. She was pulling on his hand but he didn't think she actually knew what she was doing and he didn't want to scare her.
"Hermione....Hermione...it's ok. You're safe." he was desperate now and thought about summoning Madame Pomfrey.
Her grip was fierce and then he realized that she wasn't just making indecipherable sounds, she was saying his name over and over again through her sobs.
"Oh gods `Mione...I'm here. It's ok." he said
Suddenly she launched herself at him. Tangling in the covers and weakened by her ordeal she didn't get very far but his seeker reflexes kicked in and he caught her up in his arms so she wouldn't fall.
He lowered them both to the bed as it seemed like she was trying to crawl into him. Her fingers scrabbled on the front of his shirt as if she couldn't get close enough. He didn't know if what he was doing was right but it felt like it was. Harry wrapped his arms around her more securely brushing her hair off her face and whispering over and over in her ear that she was safe.
His eyes met Ron's who was standing at the foot of the bed looking incredibly sad.
Madame Pomfrey came rushing into the room with Professor McGonagall right behind her.
When the healer saw where her patient was she leveled Harry with a stern glare but didn't say anything as she began to run her wand over Hermione as best she could.
Their head of house came to the side of the bed and spoke softly to Hermione. When she laid a hand on her head Hermione bucked violently and Harry had trouble keeping hold of her. "NO!!" she screamed, dissolving again in great wracking sobs.
McGonagall jerked her hand back as if it were burned. They were all silent for a moment, the only sounds coming from the girl breaking apart in front of them.
Madame Pomfrey left a glass on the side table "Get her to drink that soon." she said, looking at Harry pointedly. "Come Minerva, she is in good hands." her words shocking Harry, as she ushered the lost looking professor out of the room.
Ron inched closer to the bed but didn't dare try touching Hermione after seeing what had happened just moments before.
Her sobs quieted some, she wasn't shaking the entire bed anymore but she still held to the front of Harry's shirt as if she would fly apart if she didn't. Sobbing girls were not exactly his forte but strangely enough he didn't feel uncomfortable. If this is what Hermione wanted right then he would certainly not be the one to deny it to her.
Slowly she began to calm down until she was just sniffling quietly. Harry brought a tentative hand up from where it had rested on her back and brushed the hair from her face. She reached up and grabbed his hand, bringing it down to rest between them and then he heard her gasp in pain and press their clasped hands to the top of her chest.
He knew that feeling. The after affects of crucio could cause waves of pain, especially where the spell had been focused. As gently as he could he disentangled their hands and reached for the potion.
"Hermione. You need to drink this." he cajoled
She shook her head and buried it further in his neck. He exchanged a look with Ron who came and gingerly sat on the side of the bed. He held out his hand for the flask. "`Mione." said Ron as quietly as possible "It'll make you feel better. Please `Mione."
Her head came around at his words and she shot a skeptical look at the bottle. In an instant Harry knew why she was reluctant to take the potion. McLaggen had drugged her and thats why she had been helpless to do anything.
"I promise, it's just to help you sleep and take away the pain." again she resisted. "Ron and I aren't going anywhere. Promise `Mione, you're safe. We're not going to let anyone hurt you."
Her eyes shot to his and he could see the shame she felt at feeling like she couldn't handle this. That they could deal with later, right now she needed to rest.
Ron held it out again "We've got you. And look, Crookshanks is here too, you've got the best three bodyguards in all of Hogwarts."
She gave the smallest nod of acceptance and began to reach a shaky hand. Ron helped guide the bottle to her mouth and tip it back wincing along with her at the unpleasant taste.
After he sat the bottle down she shocked him by grabbing his hand and intertwining their fingers before settling back against Harry. Crookshanks jumped lightly to the bed and curled up behind Ron on Harry's outstretched legs.
Within a few minutes her breathing had evened out and she was asleep. Harry allowed his head to drop against the head board, exhausted in every possible way.
Ron summoned the chair and propped his feet up, not letting go of Hermione's hand.
"Take a kip, mate. I'm good." he said to Harry
Harry gave a half smile of appreciation and let his tired eyes slip shut. For the next few hours before sunrise the trio stayed this way, Hermione anchored between the boys, Ron keeping watch and Harry, even in sleep, not letting his hold on her lessen.