Harder To Breathe
Sung by Maroon 5
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Lily stumbled through the Head's rooms a few hours before the party was even supposed to finish, but she didn't regret it one bit. Derek was beginning to get very boring for her. He did nothing to satisfy any of her real needs and it was beginning to get aggravating. Sure he tried but she had to face it, it wasn't working. Derek was a pleasant guy to hang around with when she needed someone to talk to and study with, but if you needed to be relieved sexually, you had better do it yourself rather than wait for him to do it right.
True she didn't have many people to compare him with, she thought as she put on her pajamas. But she was experienced enough to know when it didn't work, and although he wasn't a bad snog, he wasn't that good of a shag, she admitted to herself bitterly as she began making her way to the bathroom. Then again she shouldn't be comparing him to the other person she had gone with. After all it was James Potter, and he was her first, and although a virgin when he went with her, he knew what he was to do to please her.
She stopped dead in her tracks as she saw a very wet James Potter standing with nothing but a towel wrapped around him watching her, a sly grin appearing on his lips.
"Stalking me now, Evans?" he asked her cockily, crossing his arms in front of his chest. Lily had to swallow as she began losing control of her hormones as she watched multiple water droplets make their way down his body, so very slowly.
"You wish," she whispered, trying to hide her arousal at his sight. She quickly turned to the sink, and began brushing her teeth, very fast, her eyes reflecting on his retreating back from the mirror. As he walked out the door to his door closing it behind him, she let go of the toothbrush and leaned over the sink, sighing deeply, trying to stop her heart from beating so fast.
How could a man that hated her so much be able to affect her in such a way? How could any man be able to look so angry at her yet turn her on so much at the same time? Then again this man was James Potter, she reasoned. That man could just do anything to her without even realizing it.
She soon regained control and finished cleaning her teeth. When she raised her head again to see her appearance in the mirror she let out a squeal of surprise when she saw the reflection of James standing behind her. She wheeled around, clutching the side of the sink hard and stared at him.
"Don't do that!" she scowled at him. She was soon distracted by the fact that she had just realized that he was now wearing a pair of black pajama bottoms. Only. She forced her eyes to his as she swallowed, just realizing their close proximity.
"Why?" he smirked at her, understanding her discomfort. That was his plan to begin with anyway. To show that he wanted to intimidate her even more, he took a step closer, leaving perhaps a mere inch between them. He smirked at her widening eyes. Yet she didn't move.
"Because you scared me to death," she stated. He noticed that her breathing was forced as her eyes were flicking down to his bare chest, now devoid of water. Poor girl, must be deprived, he mocked her in his mind.
"Maybe that's what I wanted to do," he told her, unable to understand why his breathing was coming out just as labored. Without intention or thought he ducked his head and captured her lips with his own. She gasped by the sudden movement but didn't do anything to get away.
He moved his lips slowly over hers, as his hands moved slowly down her bare arms, sending shivers down her spine. Her eyes were closed as he slid his tongue across her bottom lip. Just as she was about to open her mouth to his, she felt him grip her arms and picking her up, he moved her away from the sink, where he broke the kiss. With a smile he left her staring at him as he began brushing his own teeth.
"You could have just asked me to move you know," she snapped at his actions, still staring at him. Instead of answering right away, he finished brushing his teeth and looked at her with a grin.
"And where would the fun be in that?" he told her as he turned around and walked out on her once more, leaving her stunned.
"Why does he always do that?" she scoffed out loud.
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"What the fuck was that?" he asked himself as he closed the door behind him. He kicked his bed and ignored the pain shooting up his foot.
He had been sure he was over her. He was, he reminded himself; it's that she's gorgeous. Yes, that's what it was. It was lust. He had felt this before. It's what drove him to her in the first place. It's what drove her to him in the first place as well. And he could see it in her eyes she wanted him. But there was no chance he was doing that all over again.
He was right; it is what drove him to her, but he knew what that turned into be, and what it drove him too. He couldn't afford to go through with all of that again. He was fine with hating her. It was much easier that what he used to feel for her. He would have to stay away from her.
That's it, he though as he lay in bed, before sleep came over him, he'd just have to stay away from her until it passed.
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"Damn him!" she muttered as she lay in bed, finding herself unable to sleep. Images of James' wet body flashed in her mind's eye, and she cursed him harder.
Her eyes were focused on the ceiling above her, but she couldn't help remembering how close she had been to him that night. She could still feel his breath on her neck as he spoke to her during their dance, and she could feel his lips along with his tongue against hers. She grunted and slammed a fist against her covers.
"How could this man do this to me?" she groaned as she felt herself grow hotter by the second. She moved her hand between her legs and she felt her wetness and cursed him once more, but she allowed herself to imagine him above her as she tried to satisfy herself.
Hopefully with this done she'd be able to get some sleep.
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"Lily!" Emma snapped at her friend once more. She was beginning to find it incredibly annoying on her friend's constant spacing out every few seconds, when she was trying to find out what had happened the night before.
"What?" Lily mumbled her response, glanced again towards the Great Hall doors.
In her mind she had come up with a very good idea. She would wait and see which of the boys would enter first. If Derek entered first she'd break up with him. If James entered first she wouldn't try to push something to happen between them, although deep inside her she knew that either would be inevitable.
"Are you even paying attention to me?" Emma went on, temper beginning to rise.
"Of course I am," she muttered back, still staring at the doors.
Emma let out a grunt and went back to her food. Lily glanced at her friend and thought about telling her what had happened, but she knew that she wouldn't understand. She didn't know about their secret relationship last year, nor what was happening inside her. Although she wasn't very sure herself about the latter.
Her thoughts were interrupted as noise was heard outside the doors, and she had shifted all her attention towards them. Very soon Sirius Black entered the dinning room, laughing hard. Something inside Lily dropped; that would mean that-
"Lily," Derek said as he slipped in the seat next to her. She glanced at him and was guiltily elated. Shooting one more glance towards the newly arrived James, she turned back, flashes of the night before appearing in her head again, causing her to blush slightly.
"Hey," she greeted as he placed a small kiss on her lips.
She couldn't help her desire to withdraw from it. This is what it had come down to between them, an act of familiarity. Although she knew that their relationship would eventually come down to this, she wished that it had happened much later, in order to have more passion between them. But then again that was the reason she felt she had to brake up with James. He was unpredictable some of the time and passionate most of the time. This had unsettled her. She didn't want this spirit to have to be subjected to the scene of familiarity for she knew it would change him. So she broke it off, but he looked devastated, and although it broke her heart she knew she was doing the right thing. To finalize everything between them, she had started dating Derek.
As she stared at James for the remainder of her breakfast, she cursed herself for not choosing someone better. If she had done that, then maybe she wouldn't feel this incredible desire towards him that she was feeling at the moment.
With a start, she knew her position. James had complete and utter control over her. She knew that it was all up to him on how things were going to turn out. He had kissed her last night with the intensity she remembered that he possessed, but it was only to move her, and she had let him do it. This made her subjective to him and it scared her.
Well I'll just have to stay away from him now; she thought some sort dejectedly. A rub on her thigh made her look up to blue eyes. But first thing's first, she added.
"Derek, we need to talk," she told him. She willed herself not to back down on her decision as she saw Emma's and Derek's eyes widen in surprise.
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"Hey, Prongs, since when does Lily Evans stare at you?" Sirius asked his friend as he put some more pancakes in his mouth. James glanced up at Lily and saw her looking at him, before turning to her boyfriend to tell him something, he growled for unknown reasons.
"Since last night," he told them and ate a piece of sausages. His friends stared at him, expecting more.
"Care to elaborate, mate?" Remus interjected, unable to hold back his curiosity.
"No, not really," he told them with a smirk. He knew he'd eventually tell them, but this was so much more fun.
"Oh, come on Prongs, you can't tell us that and then just leave it there," Sirius hissed. James rolled his eyes, Sirius, ever the drama queen.
"Ok, ok, fine. She walked in on my while I was coming out from the shower last night," he mumbled, not looking at them.
"What? You better speak up, I think I'm hearing things," Remus replied. James threw him a glare.
"Well that would explain it. Anyone would be traumatized by what they saw," Sirius mocked. He received a glare as well. Yea but Lily of all people should have been used to it, he thought with a smug grin.
"And for what reason may I ask, do you have that ridiculous smirk on your face?" Remus whispered at him, unnoticed by Sirius and Peter, who were talking about the upcoming Quidditch match. James looked at him and grinned even more.
"Not today Moony. Maybe another time, but not today," he told him sincerely as he glance at the end of the table where Lily was sitting before. She had gone now, but he could still feel her, and it unnerved him.
Remus merely stared at his friend with a knowing look and went back to his food.
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James Love ~> Thank you very much and I'm glad you liked it. the next four chapters or so will be out by next week as they're already written so don't worry about the update
Anonymous ~> Yea I can understand that and don't worry when it's true its not mean. I was in such a hurry to put this up cos I'm not supposed to be on that I couldn't do anything right hehe hope you still keep reading though
BlueJeanMistress ~> Why thank you very much for readng it over then hehe, hope its just as good (not that there's much of a difference)
Hazeleyedmarauder ~> Thanks hope you liked this chapter and continue to read my fic. Yea I know its kind of stupid how they do it, they'll probably lose a few writers but their problem
Hayzydayz ~> Glad you liked it and I hope they are too hehe
Banny ~> why thank you very much J fast enough for you? Hope you like how it goes
Greenevans ~> thanks and you should stick around and see * evil smile *
Kat Black ~> thank you thank you thank you J here's the second chapter and the third one will be out soon
Alex C. Potter ~> Oh God thank you so much for correcting me! I saw it and I was so embarrassed! Thanks for seeing what others didn't and telling me. And I'm really glad you liked my story and you are quite right they are getting very annoying.
Chokita06 ~> why hello again Lulu! Wow you must like this story huh? Don't get me wrong I love the fact that I have such a faithful reviewer and I hope you remain one till the end
Aliasfreak ~> Thank you I'm glad you liked it and if you thought the first chapter plot was interesting wit to find out what happens later on hehe
Crazzy ~> You fell in love with my story? Wow! That's the first I hear of that but I'm actually someone loves it hehe. Yup, the first few chapters will be fast but then I have to start writing the continuation that could be a problem but we'll see I already have the next three planned out. Yay for me heh
Anonymous ~> Thanks for the compliments and the next chapters will be out shortly
Mani12191 ~> Well I can arrange something for that but I cant promise that James will be better in the following chapters hehe
A/N That must be the largest amounts of reviews that I've gotten for a single chapter ever! I'm relieved and so happy that you guys liked it as much as you did. I'm really embarrassed about the title thing that was spelled wrong and I apologize from the bottom of my heart that it didn't put you off that much. Well hope you liked this chapter as well as the rest that is on the way