Unofficial Portkey Archive

Author-Note: A long if not longest time I struggled with this chapter if I shall at all post it because Ron isn't at all nice in there. But this story was once upon a time supposed to be a deep emotional race with Ron included.

To say that I had a certain storyline in my head as I start to write, to create this plot is probably very true. But at one point, I can't even say when I lost track. It might be that I unfold this plot even though I wanted to let it be.

One asked why I wrote Please, please forgive me! ? The reason isn't so much that this two storylines are close to be similar but rather it's a different take of this idea. I hope this chapter, an unplanned no doubt, can and does show you the very different of this two stories. In fact in this take I wanted always include Ron's feelings for Hermione even though one could say what feelings but well in this vision Ron's mother is dead and the circumstance were suppose to play a deeper role in this, too. I had planned so much for this story but like I said at one point it didn't felt right to me anymore. But nevertheless I didn't want to keep this chapter away from you even though its bit unfair to Ron.

I would like to thank Another for betaing it.

6. If You're Not the One

If You're Not The One

If you're not the one then why does my soul feel glad today?
If you're not the one then why does my hand fit yours this way?
If you are not mine then why does your heart return my call
If you are not mine would I have the strength to stand at all

I don't want to run away but I can't take it, I don't understand
If I'm not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am?
Is there any way that I can stay in your arms?

By Daniel Bedingfield

Heaven must be like that. Exactly like that, he thought as he left his room. Nothing was like it should be, but this wasn't why he felt like in heaven. It was so much simpler. For the first time in his life he knew he was loved. The first time he ever felt like that. Harry found what he had sought for 15 years since he lost love.

His mood was much better in the weeks and years before as he went downstairs into the Prefect common room. Before he reached the edge of the stairs, he saw someone sitting there.

It wasn't Hermione; he knew it though he didn't have his glasses on because they were still shattered on the floor of the Gryffindor common room. He stopped in his tracks as he realized who it was. Only one other person knew the password of the sixth year Prefect area. He sat in an armchair near the fire. Ron wasn't the person who Harry wanted see right now.

This wasn't supposed to happen so soon. Only minutes before, Harry told Hermione they could sort any problems with Ron out after the weekend. After they had sorted all the issues out only between them.

Hermione needed time and if Ron was here she wouldn't get it.

Harry didn't like this situation, not at all. Maybe he could bring Ron to another place and speak with him. But there wasn't enough time. He knew it.

"You know I came only to say that I didn't mean what I said and to give your glasses back," Ron started in a forcedly calm voice, which Harry didn't like.

Slowly, he went to the fire. The only thing Harry did was hold out his hand. Without a comment Ron gave him his glasses.

"Maybe now you see clearer?" said Ron with a smirk as Harry put his glasses on.

Ron sat in front of him. He didn't look as If he wanted to sort out anything. More as if he was waiting for Harry to apologise.

"Do you know how long I've been here waiting for you?" Ron asked with a strange smirk on his lips.

Harry shook only his head as he did sit down into the armchair.

"Long enough!" Ron answered his own question.

His face grew slightly red as he tried to control himself. With his hands he worked nervously on the armrest. From all this Harry didn't get anything because his thoughts weren't here. He couldn't believe it. Just couldn't believe it. All these years Ron had been stubborn, but today it mattered. He was here to make everything impossible. Harry felt a numbness from these thoughts. Ron, his best friend, wasn't welcome. This had never happened in the past. Slowly, every so slowly, Harry got what Hermione had meant.

Lose this friendship and he wouldn't even care anymore. Not yet because he was somewhere else in a different world. In his fantasy which looked only minutes before utterly perfect was now in chaos. What if he lost Ron's friendship? What if they couldn't sort things out? What if he lost both in the end? A horrid feeling grew inside him. Something that felt like ice closed around his heart. He felt nothing but fear.

"Do you even listen to me?" snapped Ron angrily.

Harry looked up and his eyes met Ron's.

"What happened? I know you talked with her and I know you fought but I don't know why! I didn't expect that you would ever speak with her again, After she killed Cho, I mean, I know you…"

"Hermione didn't kill her. It was Voldemort," Harry interrupted him hotly.

"Are we that far now? I was there Harry. I saw with my own eyes that Hermione did case the wrong spell. She is the one to blame. She did it," was Ron's loud response.

Vigorously, Harry shook his head.

"No, no she didn't do it. Dammit, if you're so clever why didn't you try and rescue me? Where were you, Ron? You didn't do anything but blame Hermione. Voldemort wanted to kill me so she rescued me. For what price? Have you any idea what she had to live through? Do you know how sad, how damn guilty she is? Have you ever looked into her eyes and seen how dead they are? You just can't, just can't blame her for this. Not you. She could blame me because I'm the one who cost her so much pain. I'm the reason she had to suffer. Why everybody had to suffer, but not Hermione, not her!" Harry was standing and he couldn't remember how he had stand up from his chair.

His veins still coursed with hot blood. This wasn't supposed to happen. He hadn't wanted to yell at Ron. But he had gotten so mad at his words. Because they weren't true. It was as if he heard Hermione again, how she had told him that she hadn't ever been that important to him. This simply was not true. Hermione had always been important, always in his heart. With his jaw open, Ron goggled at Harry as if he was someone else, not this guy who he had known for five years. Not Harry Potter anymore, but just plain old Harry. Someone whom he hadn't seen before and didn't ever want to see.

"Is this true? You mean it?" a low, barely a whisper of a voice came from across the room.

On the bottom off the stairs was Hermione standing. Her eyes sparkling, she locked eyes with Harry immediately as he turned to her

.

"Of course I mean it." His voice sounded rough from his anger only seconds before.

Without a second thought Harry went to her and brought her into his arms. Lightly he kissed the side of her head as he held her tightly against himself.

"Off course I mean it. Every word," Harry whispered.

"You don't know how much it means to me," she said, hiccupping slightly.

Hermione was crying, silently crying. It was the first time since Cho's dead that Hermione let tears stream down her face.

"What is this suppose to mean?" Ron's voice was quivering. Harry ignored him; this wasn't the time to argue.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you before. I was just, just so unsure. You looked so far away from me that I thought I couldn't reach you, Hermione."

"Harry! What does this mean? What happened between you two?" Ron was furiously pointing from one to the other.

Harry could feel how his shirt was getting damp by now. He couldn't believe that she was still crying. Never before had she cried that long. Hermione looked up at him; her eyes were red and still teary.

"I'm so sorry. I--I didn't know what to do. I promise I won't fail again. I swear what ever it takes, I won't fail. Please believe me, I didn't want to harm Cho --"

"Stop it. Don't blame yourself. It wasn't your fault, it wasn't you who killed Cho. You know that. Voldemort is the only one to blame."

Hermione opened her mouth to argue back but Harry put his finger at her mouth. Slowly he shook his head.

"Don't argue," he whispered.

Hermione's lip started trembling. Ron just watched in amazement at this. His mouth was slightly ajar. What he saw just couldn't be. Both Harry and Hermione were ignoring him. Ron wasn't used to that. Truth be told he couldn't understand Harry.

"All what I want is you. I want to be together again. You, Ron and me." For the first time her gaze turned away from Harry to Ron. Her eyes were pleading to Ron. But he just stood up, ignoring her gaze.

"It won't ever be like that again," he said before turning around to leave.