Hi again! Here is the long awaited sequel to the first Interruptions. I've worked hard on this, so PLEASE NO FLAMES!! and also, i'm sorry about the spaceing. sometimes fanfiction really doesn't work for me. And i would like to say now that if you haven't read the first chapter, GO AND READ IT NOW!!
INTERRUPTIONS, PART 2
Meredith
Gross. Teachers never seem to shut up, do they?
Lily
Well, not usually when they're trying to teach.
Meredith
Oh, ha ha. Do you want to start a fight?
Lily
Maybe. It depends.
Meredith
On what, exactly?
Lily
Well maybe it's none of your business!
Meredith
Well, maybe it is!
Virginia
Wow, calm down! There's no need to tear out other people's hair. Yeesh, I
never knew you two could be so snappish!
Meredith
Yeah, well, live and learn.
Lily
Forget it. Let's just start with why I have to be here with her.
Virginia
Right. We are ready to tell the real story if what happened with our
boyfriends.
Meredith
Especially since Sirius messed it up so badly the first time around.
Lily
Huh. Well, as usual, James did a perfect job with the telling.
Meredith
Only because you helped him.
Lily
Shut up!
Meredith
Like he's really Mr. Perfect anyways...
Lily
Oh, like Sirius is either?
Virginia
Personally, I think Remus did a fine job.
Meredith
Speaking of Remus...
Virginia
Oh, do I have to tell her now?
Lily
Tell me what?
Virginia
Um...please don't be mad at me.
Lily
Oh no. What did you do?
Virginia
Well...I was kinda talking to Remy about the little retelling thing and I
sorta ended up inviting him.
Lily
Don't worry about it, that's not so bad.
Meredith
No, but wait until you hear the end of it.
Lily
Uh oh.
Virginia
The news sorta kinda spread.
Lily
You mean...
Virginia
Yeah. They're coming. Lily
All of them?
Virginia
Yeah.
Meredith
You know, banging your head on the table isn't good for you.
Lily
Shut up!
Virginia
...
Lily
Do you have ANY idea what happened last time I was with Sirius, James, and
Remus?
Virginia
Uh...Chaos?
Lily
Much, much more than that. You should have seen it.
Virginia
Oh.
Lily
When will they get here?
Virginia
In about two seconds and counting.
Meredith
Sirius!
Sirius
Meredith!
Remus
Okay, if this turns into a snogging session, I'm out of here.
Virginia
Remy!
James
Remy?
Remus
Shut up!
Lily
I wouldn't be talking, Boo Boo Bear!
James
Shh! No one's supposed to know about that!
Lily
Oh, they're gonna find out sooner or later!
James
What?! How in the world would they find out?
Sirius
So, Boo Boo Bear, huh? How'd ya get that name?
James
Shut up, shut up, shut up!
Meredith
Alright, now that we're all here, we will commence with the retelling.
Sirius
Retelling?
Meredith
Yes! You boys did a terrible job with our stories!
Remus
Hey!
Meredith
Oh, don't get so uppity, Remus.
Sirius
I didn't do anything!
Meredith
Most of it's your fault, Sirius Lee Black! You know very well that I'm not just your rebound girl! We fully agreed on breaking up before the summer!
Sirius
Ok, don't use so many exclamation points, there!
Lily
Is there some trouble in paradise?
Meredith
No! Nothing's wrong except for the fact that Sirius has a bloated head!
James
Yeah, that's been a problem from day one. It really is a hazard to get him
through the doorways.
Lily
Please! I don't know why you, of all people, are talking about someone
else's bloated head.
James
What's that supposed to mean?!
Remus
Why do I get the feeling that we're the only non-dysfunctional couple here?
Virginia
Because you're right.
Remus
Did you bring any popcorn? This is gonna take a while.
Sirius
Hey! You two lovebirds! Don't you dare wonder off until I get a chance to
talk to you about the birds and the bees.
James
Seriously, I didn't think that there was a color that your face could turn
that came after puce until today.
Sirius
Do you think they're getting enough air?
Meredith
This is going no where.
Lily
Gee, who told you that?
Meredith
I'm warning you...
Lily
Oh, please.
Sirius
How much did you bet on Lily again?
James
Not enough.
Lily
Hey!
Meredith
Look, I just wanted all of us to come here and fix this problem.
Sirius
What problem?
Meredith
Arrghh! Do I have to go over it again?
James
Just ten more times, then, if we're lucky, it might be able to stay in his
head. But that's a big might.
Meredith
Remind me why I'm dating you before the summer?
Sirius
'Cause I'm cute and loveable.
Meredith
Not the qualities I would have chosen.
James
Why are we here again?
Remus
Are we going to be finished soon? Virginia and I want to go to the library.
James
Again? What do you two do in there?
Sirius
Think about it...
Remus
NO!
Virginia
That's not what we do, thank you!
Sirius
I didn't say anything.
Meredith
We are so off track.
James
Aren't we always?
Sirius
I thought we were supposed to retell something.
Meredith
WE ARE!
Sirius
Whoa! Feel free to actually lower your voice about two notches, thank you.
Meredith
Look, I'm just trying to get the facts straight here. Ok? Can you give me
that much?
Sirius
Sure. How much more do you want?
James
Oh, man, that was corny.
Sirius
Beggars can't be choosers.
Remus
That should be moochers can't be choosers.
Sirius
Hey, I don't mooch as much as I used to!
Lily
Sure...
Virginia
Why is it always like this with you two?
Sirius
Like what?
Virginia
Like...shoot, now I can't describe it!
James
Yeah, we are pretty indescribable.
Lily
You mean undesirable.
Sirius
Yeah, that too...wait a minute!
Virginia
That took a while.
Remus
He has a slow brain.
James
Who said anything about him having a brain at all?
Sirius
So...didn't you want dolls want us to re-do something?
Lily
Umm...Meredith left after you said you were a moocher.
Sirius
Oh. I knew that...
Remus
I never doubted your intelligence.
Sirius
You were being sarcastic, right?
Remus
Yep.
Lily
So...now what?
Remus
Umm...you know what? I just remembered I have to 'leave.'
Virginia
What do you mean by that?
Sirius
Gee, she acts just like lily. Are you sure she isn't lily's long lost
sister or something?
James
Shh! They hardly ever fight and I like to be reminded that they are
actually a normal couple sometimes.
Remus
That I have to leave.
Virginia
Why do you always do this?
Remus
Do what?
Virginia
THIS!
Lily
Umm...do you think we should back away slowly?
James
No...I think we should run away quickly.
Sirius
Which way is the nearest exit?
Remus
I don't know what you're talking about!
Virginia
You always do this to me...nearly every month.
Remus
No...don't cry...I can't stand to see you like that.
Lily
Ahh...that was even more touching than the romantic movie I saw last summer!
Virginia
Well, then just leave like you always do, maybe then you won't have to look
at my bloated face!
Sirius
Does her face get puffy when she cries?
Lily
Yeah, you can't see her eyes.
James
Like her neck is blowing a bubble?
Lily
James, that's not funny.
James
Maybe we should be-
Remus
Just trust me, ok? Can't you do that?
Sirius
I think she's already out the door, Moony.
Remus
I better go.
Sirius
Well, now that that's behind us, maybe we should have a nice cup of tea and
plant some roses.
Lily
Ok, you go do that.
James
Man, talking about overreacting.
Lily
What does that mean?
Sirius
Huh?
James
Well, she was clearly being a drama queen.
Sirius
Uh, oh...
Lily
She has a point, you know.
James
A point?
Lily
Yes, is that thought so inconceivable? You think that girls are incapable
of having a point?
James
Err...I...need to go to the bathroom?
Sirius
No you don't, you go every day when potions starts.
Lily
James, you are not getting out of this one.
Sirius
Yeah, 'cause she didn't let you off any of the other times.
James
Sirius...
Lily and James
SHUT UP!!
Sirius
Ouch...I'm gonna go over to the corner now...and regain my ability to hear.
James
Lil, I don't think...
Lily
Exactly, you don't think.
James
Wait, you can't leave-Binns might turn around and actually check on us and
see that half his class has walked out! LILY!
Sirius
Sorry, Boo Boo Bear.
James
I thought I told you not to call me that.
Sirius
No, you just blamed lily for bringing it up.
James
Lily. I have to go talk to her...
Sirius
Wait a minute! Like you said, Binns might actually watch us for a change
and catch you leaving. Besides...I have a plan.
James
What do you mean, catch me leaving?! Half his class has walked out already!
I don't think- ...wait a minute...did you just say that you have a plan?
Sirius
Yeah.
James
You mean you're actually using that brain of yours?
Sirius
It has to be used for something, right? Why not ingenious plots?
James
I don't know...I really need to go after lily.
Sirius
Don't. Listen to me-
James
Those words are famous death wishes.
Sirius
Ha ha. Loved that joke. Not.
James
Alright, what do you want?
Sirius
Come closer.
James
We're sharing the same piece of paper. That's close enough for me.
Sirius
How am I supposed to tell you...?
James
What? Could you whisper a bit louder, please?
Sirius
...
James
I said louder, not inaudible.
Sirius
...
James
huh?
Sirius
I SAID I WANT TO PULL A PRANK ON SNAPE!!
James
Oh. Why didn't you just say so?
Sirius
Sigh.
James
That's no big deal. We do it all the time.
Sirius
Yeah, but we don't usually use Moony as bait.
James
...wha...
Sirius
Yep. This is no ordinary prank.
James
Hold on...let me get this straight.
Sirius
No, no. Leave it crumpled; it's much more fun that way. Leave it that way
for once.
James
We're using our own friend as bait for some sort of twisted practical joke?
Sirius
To get at Snivellus-you can't forget that. It makes it all worthwhile.
James
Whatever. The point is we're using Moony when we're supposed to be helping
him.
Sirius
Says who?
James
Says every teacher in this school.
Sirius
Oh, yeah...but since when do we listen to them?
James
You really don't see a problem with this, do you?
Sirius
Not really, no.
James
Oh. Well, in that case...
Sirius
You cave in really easily, don't you?
James
It's to get at Snivellus, right?
Sirius
What else would it be for?
James
All right; I'm in.
Sirius
Yea!
Lily
What are you yea-ing about?
Sirius
No reason, why?
Lily
Well the only reason you're usually that happy is when you're about to pull
a prank on-
Sirius
Quick James; evasive maneuver number three!
James
No one was yea-ing.
Sirius
We don't know what you're talking about, Lil.
Lily
Huh?
Sirius
So...Lil...how are you doing?
Lily
Uh...fine.
Sirius
Good, good.
Lily
Now I'm really freaked out.
James
Aren't you always?
Lily
What?
James
Never mind.
Sirius
That was just Prong's feeble attempt at making a joke. He just can't
measure up to me, no matter how hard he tries...
James
Sigh. Must you always make me hurt you?
Sirius
OUCH!!
Lily
Don't you two want to know how Virginia is?
Sirius
Oh, is that why you came back?
Lily
That and I can't afford to miss class, thanks to James.
James
I didn't mean to get you in trouble!
Lily
Sure...
Sirius
And silly little me thought you might come back to be with James. Now we
know where your loyalties lie.
James
He has a point.
Lily
Now that thought is inconceivable.
James
She has a point.
Sirius
I'm about to point you in your eye, Boo Boo Bear.
James
All your jokes are falling flat today, Siri.
Sirius
Don't call me that.
Lily
Maybe it's because he needs Meredith to help him...
James
Hmmm...
Lily
Hmmm...
Sirius
No.
Lily
You miss her!
Sirius
No I don't!
James
Hahahaha! He misses her!!
Sirius
I told you-
James
I think I'm gonna die of laughter!
Sirius
Stop it!
Lily
I'll go get her, Sirius.
Sirius
No! I don't want he- oh, why hello Meredith, my dear.
Meredith
Sirius.
Lily
Ouch. Cold shoulder.
Sirius
Where's a suicide pop when you need one?
James
They're selling them at Zonko's.
Lily
Try to be more helpful, James.
Meredith
If you don't need me, I'll leave.
Sirius
No! Ummm...you can't leave yet...
Meredith
Why not?
Sirius
Because...you haven't...darned my socks?
Meredith
Goodbye.
Sirius
No, wait!!
Meredith
Sigh. What now?
Lily
Maybe we should give them a moment alone.
James
Maybe we should eavesdrop.
Lily
I like that idea better.
Meredith
Look, nothing you can say to me will-
Lily
GROSS!!
James
Do we really look like that when we kiss?
Lily
No, James dear, we don't kiss like penguins.
James
Guys...? As much as I respect both of you, I have to say that there is no
possible way that this kiss can continue.
Lily
'Cause it's gross.
James
Right.
Lily
Oh, good, they've separated.
James
Whew...that was close.
Meredith
Wow. I really wasn't expecting that.
Sirius
Heh, heh...well, I didn't mean to...that is to say, I...
Meredith
Don't worry. I forgive you.
James
Thank goodness.
Meredith
Oh! I have to go!
Sirius
So soon?
James
Ok, too much mushiness for me, thank you.
Meredith
Bye.
Lily
Well, aren't you glad that I called her back?
Sirius
Huh?
Lily
Hey!
Sirius
OUCH! THAT HURT!!
Lily
Oh, you big baby.
James
No, really. Your punches really hurt, Lil. Maybe you need to take therapy.
Lily
I do NOT need to take therapy.
Sirius
Don't worry, James. She just has a temper because she's a red-head.
James
Uh, oh.
Lily
WHAT DID YOU SAY, SIRIUS LEE BLACK?!
Sirius
Um...
James
I know; evasive maneuver number three...
Sirius
I said that the grass looks green today.
Lily
What?
James
And the sky is abnormally blue.
Lily
Oh, ha ha.
Sirius
Well, I thought it was funny.
James
Thank you.
Sirius
It wasn't as good as my jokes, of course, but...
James
Don't you need a suicide pop, or something?
Virginia
Hey, guys.
Sirius and James
Virginia?
Lily
Are you ok?
Virginia
I could be doing better. So, are you telling the stories yet? I mean, we have enough time now; classes are over and
we're just sitting here in the
common room doing nothing.
Sirius
Thank you Captain Obvious.
James
What stories?
Lily
Sigh.
James
OUCH!!
Virginia
You mean that you haven't even started?
Lily
Well, it's kinda hard.
Virginia
Oh. Right.
Sirius
I think that James and Lily don't need to tell their story.
James
Really? Why?
Sirius
Don't narrow your eyes at me!
Virginia
He's right. You two told the last story so well.
Sirius
Considering that it wasn't true.
Lily
We just wanted to make it more interesting.
James
And keep Sirius from not telling his story.
Sirius
How'd YOU know it wasn't true, anyway?
Virginia
I read the notes from your dormitory.
James
How in the world did you get up there?
Virginia
Just because the girl's dorm is locked, it doesn't mean that the boy's is
too.
Lily
Plus we were dying all of your underwear pink.
Sirius
YOU did that?!
Virginia
Ingenious, right?
Sirius
More like lucky.
Lily
Lucky?
Sirius
That we weren't up there.
Lily
Oh, and what would you do, huh?
Virginia
Uh oh...James, stop them.
James
I have no control over Padfoot.
Virginia
But what about Lily?
James
What do you think?
Virginia
SIRIUS! STOP BUTTING HEADS WITH LILY!!
James
LILY! STOP KICKING SIRIUS YOU-KNOW-WHERE!!
Virginia
We have to find separate cages for them one day.
James
If only the owl cages were big enough....
Virginia
I don't think Sirius' big head would let him fit anyway.
James
True.
Sirius
Owww....look at me; I'm limping for Merlin's sake!
James
C'mon, it didn't hurt that badly.
Sirius
Yeah? Well, you try getting kicked there five times!
James
No thank you.
Lily
OH MY GOSH!
Sirius
Now what?
Lily
Do you know what time it is?
James
Ummm...about 7:00pm would be my guess, but my watch has stopped ever since
Padfoot pushed me into the lake.
Lily
Virginia, we're late for our prefect's meeting!
Virginia
Uh, oh...we have to go. McGonagall gets really testy whenever prefects from
her own house are late.
Sirius
See you two dolls later.
James
Hey, Padfoot?
Sirius
Yes, Prongs?
James
Aren't we supposed to be doing something that involves Moony turning into a
werewolf?
Sirius
I'm not sure.
James
Padfoot...
Sirius
Huh? OUCH!!
James
Moony is going to turn into a werewolf any second and we're not there to
help him!
Sirius
Oh, is that what the fuss is all about?
James
PADFOOT!
Sirius
I'm coming, I'm coming!! Hey, what about the parchment?
James
Just leave it there! No one will notice it!
Sirius
Ok, but...
James
PADFOOT!! WE HAVE TO GO!
one hour later
Lily
That's weird.
Virginia
What?
Lily
They aren't here.
Virginia
Who isn't here?
Lily
Sirius and James.
Virginia
That's not so weird.
Lily
No, but...
Virginia
What's weird is what they wrote after we were gone.
Lily
What do you mean?
Virginia
Look.
Lily
...
Virginia
You don't think...
Lily
No way. It's just another prank they're trying to pull on us.
Virginia
Remus can't be a werewolf.
Lily
They must have been playing around or something.
Virginia
Sure...
Lily
Let's just leave it here and pretend we didn't see it.
Virginia
Right.
Lily
Although, it would explain a few things...
Virginia
Let's not talk about it now, k? I need a good night's sleep.
Lily
Alright, then.
two hours later
James
That was a close one.
Sirius
Yeah, remind me never to try jumping over the lake again.
James
Why'd you even try in the first place?
Sirius
....you know what?....
James
What?
Sirius
I don't remember.
James
Gee. That's weird.
Sirius
Was that your attempt at being sarcastic?
James
Basically, yeah.
Sirius
Good. I was concerned there for a second.
James
Hey, does something seem different to you?
Sirius
Like what?
James
The parchment was moved.
Sirius
Yeah, 'cause I just moved it. You have really good deductive skills, James.
James
No, I mean it was moved before we came back. Someone was reading it.
Sirius
Dun dun DUNNNN!
James
Funny man.
Sirius
Actually my nickname is the King of all Pranks.
James
In your dreams.
Sirius
No, in my dreams, it's-
James
Enough already.
Sirius
So, who moved it?
James
Moved what?
Sirius
Sigh.
James
OUCH!! What was that for?!
Sirius
I don't know; I just felt like acting like you.
James
Ha, ha.
Sirius
Who moved the parchment? Yeesh, do I have to ask you twice?
James
You just did. And I can't tell.
Sirius
That crosses detective for the department of mysteries off your list of
jobs. You know that list is just getting smaller every day.
James
AHA!!
Sirius
Aha what?
James
It was Lily!
Sirius
What was she- oh no.
James
Why in the world did we put that in writing?
Sirius
Because your brain waves disrupted mine.
James
This is all your fault.
Sirius
How's it my fault?!
James
I don't know, but this is the only thing I can depend on in a crisis.
Sirius
True.
James
Look, maybe we should just get out of here-with the parchment- and hope and
pray-
Sirius
Now who are we praying to this time?
James
Let's see...Merlin is the only one we haven't tried...
Sirius
Good choice.
James
Thank you. And maybe we can worry about this in the morning.
Sirius
Ok.
James
Ok.
Sirius
I'm hungry.
James
You're always hungry.
Sirius
But this is a pain-in-the-stomach kind of hungry.
James
You had that last night.
Sirius
No, that was a rumbling-in-the-stomach type of hungry.
James
Oh, I always get those confused.
Sirius
Yeah, that sounds like you.
James
Well, at least your stomach isn't talking again.
Sirius
Oh, yeah! I forgot that I could do that!
James
Oh, man...why'd I have to remind him?
Sirius
FEED ME!!
James
You are an embarrassment to high society. If there we any high society
people in here, I'm sure they'd be embarrassed.
Sirius
AND I MEAN IT THIS TIME!!
James
So, please just save him the pain that I'm going to give him and stop the
fic right no-
Emmablk1: July 20, 2004 ;)
Emmablk1:
Well, I hope you liked it. It's about two pages longer than the first one, but I can't help thinking that
it's not as good. Send me some reviews and
tell me!!
Sirius
Yes, send some reviews, and while you're at it, send some band-aids.
James
They did not hit you that hard.
Sirius
You wanna bet?
Emmablk1:
Sigh. Where's Remus when you want him?
Sirius
Where was Peter during all this, anyway?
James and Emmablk1:
...
James
Wait a minute! YOU should know, you're the author!
Emmablk1:
Well...he was...indisposed.
Sirius
O...K...James, Defensive maneuver number six!!
Emmablk1:
Hey! What are you doing?!
James
Throwing you into the lake, nothing special.
Emmablk1:
AHHHHHH!!!!
Sirius
That was fun. We should do it to someone else.
James
Like Snape?
Sirius
Yeah!!
Emmablk1:
Hey! You can't just leave me in here!! Oh, no! My watch stopped!
James
Will this thing never end?
Sirius
So long, folks. And remember, if you should one day find your stomach
talking, that probably means that you forgot to feed it.
Emmablk1: July 20, 2004 ;)
So, was it ok? tell me!! and for further notice, i was realyl hyper during most of this b/c i had my friends over for a sleepover and they were sitting right next to me when i was writing it, so some of the better jokes might belong to them. ;) ttyl! and if anyone gives me a good idea for anyother one, then i'll start writing it! b/c i am all out of ideas for a while.