Title: Adrift
Summary: It was supposed to be the perfect holiday, but a tragic accident plunges Harry and Hermione adrift in to a new, uncertain life.
Rating: PG-13 for language and adult themes
Authors Notes: I'm back! Wasn't planning on updating until tomorrow, but I'm waiting for something cook and I thought whilst I'm waiting it would be the best chance to update for you all! As always, please review even if you're not happy! There's been some points bought up in the reviews that I am going to address- just haven't had a chance yet! But for now, enjoy!
TEN
'Hey Mum,' Rose said to Hermione as they sat down to dinner. 'Are we going to be putting up the Christmas decorations?'
Hermione stopped halfway into the dining room and looked at her daughter. Two weeks had passed since the funerals, three since Ron had died and Christmas was fast approaching. Normally the decorations would be out and the tree up, ready and waiting to be decorated when Rose and Hugo came home from Hogwarts.
'I hadn't thought about them,' Hermione said honestly, sitting down and looking from Rose to Hugo. 'Do you guys want to put them up?'
'Maybe not as many,' Hugo said sadly. 'Dad won't be here to put the Angel on the tree.'
'Maybe you can put the Angel on the tree,' Hermione suggested, her hand shaking slightly as she picked up her fork.
At once, she knew she had said one of the many things that upset the kids. Hugo sighed and put his own fork down and got up and left the dining room. Rose looked at her mother, her eyes filling with tears.
'I hate this,' Rose said softly, pushing her dinner aside and following her brother.
Hermione rested her head in her hands, rubbed her eyes and took several deep breaths. She had tried to make life normal for Rose and Hugo, as normal as it could be. She cried herself to sleep every night, but tried not to show too much emotion around the kids. She didn't want them to know how much of a wreck she really was.
Having also lost her appetite, she used her wand to send the plates back into the kitchen and followed Rose and Hugo. Rose was in the lounge room, flipping through the assignments that Hogwarts had sent her. Hermione headed upstairs to Hugo's room and found him sitting on his bed, staring at the wall.
'I'm sorry,' she said, knocking on the door and entering the room, sitting on the bed beside her only son. 'I know how much Dad putting the Angel on the tree meant to you.'
'I don't think we should do Christmas,' Hugo said, looking away and wiping his eyes on his arm. 'It won't be right.'
'No, it won't be,' Hermione said, nodding. 'But not doing Christmas this year, we're just delaying the sadness. It'll be hard no matter when we do it, and if we leave it, it'll get harder.'
'Such a mum answer,' Hugo said and Hermione laughed, and put an arm around his shoulder and hugged him.
'So shoot me,' she teased. 'I'm not going to make you do something you don't want to do.'
'I know.'
She kissed the side of her son's head and stood up, looking down at him.
'We're good?'
'We're good.'
He smiled at her, very slightly and stood up.
'I'm going to go do some homework.'
Hermione followed him out of the room and stood at the top of the stairs and watched him as he walked down and went into the lounge room and sat on the floor in front of his sister, pulling a book and some parchment towards him. She watched them for a few minutes, before turning away and heading into her study. As she turned to shut the door, her eyes fell on the still closed door to Ron's study.
She still hadn't gone in.
A owl hooted softly as she closed the door and she smiled to see Nathaniel, Harry's owl, sitting on the window sill. She approached slowly and untied the small scroll of parchment.
Hermione,
Same place, same time?
Harry
She put the letter down on her desk as Nathaniel flew out the window. She walked over to the door and opened it slightly and listened. Rose and Hugo were quiet. They wouldn't notice she had gone.
She closed her eyes and turned on the spot. When she reopened her eyes, she was standing in a small park, beside a pond that in the daytime was filled with ducks, but was quiet at night.
Moments after she arrived, she heard a small pop and saw Harry walking towards her. They hugged, holding each other tight and then began to walk the path around the pond, holding hands.
'How are you?' Harry asked her.
'As well as I can be,' she said. 'I feel like I'm smiling more. That's a start, isn't it?'
'I guess,' he said, shrugging his shoulders. 'I went to work today.'
'How did that go?'
'It was strange. Everyone was great- they bought me up to date on everything and I got a memo out for people to apply for Ron's position.'
'I can't even think about going to work,' she said softly. 'I've been wondering if I need to go back.'
'Surely you guys would have enough savings in Gringott's for you to be able to stay home for a while?' Harry asked. Hermione nodded, marvelling at how easy it was to talk about personal things like money with Harry. Nothing was secret between them anymore. They needed each other too much to keep secrets.
'I did some sums. If we're very careful with our budget, I wouldn't have to work again until the kids are out of Hogwarts. But I don't want to be thinking about money too much, especially with the kids. I want them to enjoy themselves and I want to have the money there to do that.'
'Would you sell the house at Ottery St Catchpole?'
'No,' she answered firmly. 'Too many family memories. I could never sell it.'
'I feel the same,' Harry said truthfully. 'Someone asked if I'd be moving into London now that I'm on my own.'
'What did you say?'
'That I'm not on my own,' they both laughed. 'Could you imagine the kids if I said we'd be living in London?'
'James would kill you. How is he?'
'He's very angry. He takes his anger out on Albus a lot. I have to keep them separated. I set up the attic as a new bedroom for him, something bigger to give him more space, but he's still carrying on. Albus spends most of his time hiding in his bedroom in terror. Lily is the only one he will listen to.'
'He just needs time,' Hermione said wisely. 'Rose asked me if we were putting up the Christmas decorations still.'
'And?'
'I said if they want to, we will. I want to, I want to treat it like nothing has happened. Hugo was very upset when I suggest he hang the Angel. Ron always hung the Angel.'
'You don't have to plan everything. Just see what happens. Christmas is still a long way away,' Harry said, checking his watch. 'We should get back. I didn't tell them I was going out, for all I know my house has been blown up.'
'Tomorrow?' Hermione asked.
'I'll owl you.'
Harry kissed her on the cheek and let go of her hand and turned on the spot. He apparated directly into his bedroom and straightaway could hear raised voices coming from down the hallway.
He headed down to Albus's room and stood in the doorway. James was in there, towering over his younger brother.
'Don't touch my stuff!' James yelled at Albus. 'You always wreck it!'
'It's mine!' Albus yelled back. 'Mum gave it to me!'
'Don't lie!' James's voice hit a high pitch and Harry felt the hairs on the back of his neck stand on end. In his mind he could see a very different teenage boy yelling the same thing and he shuddered, and then felt disgusted for even comparing his son to Tom Riddle.
'What's going on?' Harry asked and James jumped, startled.
'James reckons that the Quidditch board game from mum last Christmas is his. But mum gave it to me.'
'Your mother gave it to both of you,' Harry said, looking between them. 'James, was Albus already playing it?'
'I was,' James said haughtily. Harry looked at his youngest son, who was almost in tears. 'And he plays it wrong and breaks it.'
'Stop treating me like a five year old,' Albus said to James, a sulk in his voice.
'Stop acting like a five year old,' James retorted.
'Boys, enough,' Harry said firmly, looking between them. 'I don't know what is causing this, but enough is enough. James, you need to start being nicer to Albus. And Albus, you need to start being nicer to James. You used to be so close and it hurts me to see you fighting all the time. And if your mother was here, it would be hurting her too.'
'Yeah, well, thanks to you our mother isn't here now, is she?' James said fiercely to Harry, stalking past him and out of the room.
Harry was at a loss for words. He looked at Albus, who looked away.
'Leave me alone, dad,' he said and Harry backed out of the room.
He wandered through the house, ending up sitting in the sunroom. It was dark and cold sitting there, the only light was coming from the lounge room behind him.
It was here that Lily found him and she sat down next to her father and snuggled into him.
'I hate it when the boys fight,' she said sadly. 'It makes me miss mum.'
'Same here,' Harry said, putting his arm around her so she could snuggle in closer.
'Will they ever be friends again?'
'I don't know. I hope so.'
'So do I. Cause we'll need each other if we lose you too.'
Harry looked down at his daughter. She often said things that seemed too wise for someone so young. She was right though- more than anything, more than they needed their father or mother, the three of them needed each other.
And Harry hoped that the boys would realise this before it was too late.