2003 Normal 2003 1 1 2003-07-14T18:51:00Z 2003-07-14T18:52:00Z 1 3296 17799 148 42 21053 10.2625 21 MicrosoftInternetExplorer4
Title: Forever a Secret (01/?)
Author name: LittleWitch
Author email: littlewitch_br@hotmail.com
Category: Romance
Sub Category: Drama
Keywords: Harry Potter Hermione Granger H/Hr
Rating: PG-13
Spoilers: SS/PS, CoS, PoA, GoF
Summary: The Wizard World was a mysterious place -- full of secrets. Three years after the fall of the
Dark Lord, darkness was still spreading over. A secret was held. A secret that was killing their souls. But they had to
pay the price -- or else the rest of the world would. No matter what, it had to be forever a secret.
DISCLAIMER: This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various
publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc.
No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.
Author notes: Thanks to Milagros, my beta friend, whose initial support was what made me go on with
this fic ( Hope you are okay and things got better for you in real life). And a huge thanks to Jennifer who decided to
join us in this crazy adventure. ( You are the fastest beta in the world and an incredible one either) These chapters
are dedicated to you two. Thanks.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Chapter 1: Merlin, Help Me.
There was a knock on the door.
"Come in," echoed Hermione's voice.
She was sitting at her desk. However, instead of facing the large desk full of quills, parchments and old books, she had her back to it. In fact, she was staring at the view from the large windows of her office at The Wizard Institute of Research, or WIR for short.
Hermione had been working at the WIR since she left Hogwarts. This had been her office since then. It wasn't much, really. The furniture was very simple and there were so many books that it looked like a small section of Hogwarts' library. There were no paintings on the walls, just shelves full of books and very odd bottles of potions with strange names on the labels. A cauldron was in one side of the room. While on the opposite side, there was no wall at all, just large windows coming down to the floor and up to the ceiling. Usually, those windows would hold no view because the red velvet curtains would be closed--and her office would be dark as ever, with a strange scent in the air and a hundred candles floating to bring light to the room.
With all that, Hermione's office seemed to be a sad place. There was not even a fireplace, so no one would disturb her in the middle of work. Work seemed to be the only thing done in that place. There was no laughter, no joy--just sadness, tears and more work.
The only thing that could faintly resemble happiness and, by the way, seemed completely out of place, was a single rose--a magical rose called a rainbow rose. No, it didn't have that name because it had a green petal, then a yellow one, then an orange and so on. It had that name because each of its white petals had a trace of the seven colours of the rainbow in very faint hues, which made it all more delicate.
The single rose was in a vase on the desk, lost between all those books.
"Hermione," called a blond girl, who apparently was the same age as Hermione, "you have been here all morning. Here, I brought you some coffee. Sugar free, as you like."
"Thanks, Dorothy. You can leave it on my desk."
Dorothy tried to find some free space on the desk, so she could put the coffee down. Finding none, she sighed in defeat. Then it finally hit her that there was something amiss with Hermione.
"First, Hermione was not working which must be some kind of miracle," Dorothy wondered. "Then -- she was staring at the window -For Harry Potter's Scar, the windows are open?!?!'
Placing the coffee on the top of a pillar of books that, by the looks of it, could collapse at any second, Dorothy turned behind the desk and stopped at Hermione's side. She glanced at Hermione, then at the window--then at Hermione, then at the window, until she could no longer hold her question. "Hermione, what are you doing?"
"Huh?" Hermione woke up from her daydream and looked up at her assistant. Smiling, she answered, "I'm just appreciating the view."
Once again, Dorothy glanced out the window and thought, "No. This is no different from the usual view; just blue sky and some clouds." After all, there was not much of a view when you worked in the WIR building, which happens to be a magical building located up in the sky.
"And what's so interesting in the view of clouds?" she asked Hermione.
Hermione laughed at her friend seeing the confused look on her face. "It's not the clouds themselves, it's what they represent, you know."
"Not really," Dorothy answered, still not understanding.
"Alright. Let me try to explain it to you. The thing is that these clouds mean that I'm in the middle of the sky."
Dorothy seemed more confused. "That's kind of obvious, don't you think?"
Hermione glared at her. "Let me finish, Dorothy. Do you have any idea of how scared of heights I am? A lot. And look at me. I work at a flying building in the middle of the sky. I have clouds as a window-view. I mean life sure plays tricks on us. It's almost cruel." Hermione stood up abruptly with a vivid gleam in her eyes. She started pacing and went on with her speech, "No, life is cruel. It is unfair. And it never turns out as you wish. "
Dorothy was in shock. She had no idea what Hermione was talking about. But one thing was sure, Hermione was stressed out.
"Hermione is everything, okay? If you are nervous about your presentation, don't be. You have been working on this project for two years. It's perfect. The council will approve and then...well, then you'll be working more to make all that stuff that you have on paper become reality."
"Don't worry, Dorothy. I'm not nervous at all about this. Ok, maybe a little, but that's the least of my problems now. My life is in a complete mess, that's what my real problem is."
"Is there something that I can do to help you?"
"I don't think so. Unless you can turn back time."
"Sorry. No time-turner," Dorothy replied.
"Yeah I wish I still had mine, too."
There was another knock on the door but this time, before Hermione could call the person in, Sirius Black's head appeared in the doorway
"May I come in?" he asked, although he was already in.
"Ah, hello, Mr. Black."
"Hi, Dorothy. Hermione."
Hermione just nodded. Dorothy realised that the vivid gleam in Hermione's eyes changed into a very cold glare. And the target of that glare was none other than Sirius Black, the not so old and still very charming godfather of The Boy Who Lived. Dorothy couldn't stop herself as she blushed at that last thought.
"Dorothy, could you excuse us for a moment?" asked Hermione.
"Oh, Sure. I'm meeting Mitzrael for lunch. Do you want anything?"
"No, thanks. I'm not hungry."
"Okay. See you later. Bye, Mr. Black." Dorothy smiled at him.
Sirius smiled back. "Bye, Dorothy."
As soon as Dorothy closed the door behind her, she could hear the loud noise of something breaking.
****************
"Hermione! What's that for? Are you trying to kill me? What have I done?" Sirius yelled as he looked at his back to see the shattered pieces of the vase that just a second before almost hit him.
The rainbow rose was forgotten on the floor.
"You know very well what you did, Sirius!" Hermione yelled back.
"If it's about last night..."
"Of course it's about last night. You and ...You and Snape took Harry to the Three Broomsticks. Great Wizards!!! I can't even conjure up the image of the three of you drinking together in my mind. I can't think of Snape getting drunk with you and Harry of all the wizards. It's so bizarre."
"Actually, Severus wasn't drinking, just complaining." Sirius smiled as the thought of an annoyed Snape crossed his mind.
"Oh, great. Why didn't you say it before? Now I'm relieved. Come on, Sirius. What were the two of you thinking? Oh, right, you weren't thinking. In fact, you never think about the consequences, do you, Sirius? When are going to grow up? You know that Harry is not supposed to drink too much. It could have some dangerous side effects on the Spell, and you know very well what could have happened. You know all this and still you took him there. You are supposed to be his godfather, to take care of him, but you aren't doing that, are you?"
"Ok, that's enough." He stepped closer to her and started to scream while putting his finger in front of her face, "Now, you listen to me, Hermione. I know very well that Harry is my responsibility. And I know that I took some risks last night that I shouldn't have, but I had to. You didn't see him when he arrived at the Order last night. I guess that he went there because he didn't think that he would find anyone there. Do you know what I saw last night when I looked into his eyes? I saw a little boy locked in a cupboard below the stairs. He was lost. He was lost because deep down I think that he knows, Hermione. He knows that everything is wrong. So yes, I took him to drink some butterbeers. Even if Snape had protested and although I had my own fears about what could happen. But I just wanted to ease some of that suffering that I saw in his eyes and," he said, then his voice softened, "it was just butterbeer, nothing stronger than that, Hermione." Sirius took her hand in his. "I do believe that if it weakens the spell it makes him stronger."
Hermione looked up and found Sirius' eyes, and then she sobbed. She let her tears flow, let all her pain come to the surface. "I'm sorry, Sirius."
"Shh...come here." He hugged her.
"I'm so sorry. So sorry...it's just that I can't stand it anymore, Sirius. I can't."
"It'll be Ok, Hermione. It'll be Ok."
"No, it won't. You know that it will never be. For as long as I live. For as long as he lives."
"What happened, Hermione? What really happened? This is not like you at all."
Hermione stepped back and wept her tears. "Harry's scar was glowing this morning."
"What??? But that can't be. Vold-" She could sense the panic in Sirius' voice.
Hermione suddenly raised her hand stopping his words. "Don't say His name. At least, not in my presence." Sighing, she looked down and her eyes ended up finding the rose. Slowly, she went to where the pieces of vase were and with a flick of her hand whispered, "Reparo Totalus." The vase was like new in an instant. She turned her attention back to Sirius. "You don't need to worry about that. It was not like the 'I'm burning, which means You-Know-Who is near'. It was more like, 'I'm glowing this deep green colour which means that there's something wrong with The Boy Who Lived -- so stay back'."
"Ah, that kind of glowing." Sirius frowned.
"Yeah, that kind. So I understand your good intentions about yesterday but we both know that Hell too is full of good intentions. I would appreciate it if the next time Harry is depressed or in a bad mood, you just let him in front of the Mirror of Erised. It would have less drastic consequences."
"I understand." There was something in his eyes that made her believe he did understand.
"I know you do." She gave him a weak smile and said, "Accio, rose." The rose came to her hands and Hermione stared at it for a long time. Closing her eyes and taking a deep breath, she put it back in the vase. "So, what brought you here in the first place? Aren't you supposed to be in an Order meeting or something like that? Harry left this morning after Hedwig appeared with an emergency note. I thought you would be there."
"I was. The meeting was over an hour ago."
"And?"
"And what?"
"Come on, Sirius. You just had an emergency meeting and after that you came straight to my office? Just say it. My day can't get worse at this point."
"Yeah, Harry told me about Ron's proposal."
"He did, didn't he? Isn't it funny that Harry thinks this is funny?"
"Well, you can't blame him. How many times has Ron proposed to you anyway?"
"I don't know. I stopped counting a long time ago. Let's put like this, if you count all the times Ginny and Harry have broken up and all the times Ron has proposed to me and I said no, we are winning by far, which means that he certainly has proposed a lot. I just wished he stop."
"He can't, he's Ron."
"Yes, I know, but...but you are changing the subject. What was the emergency about?"
"Huh...Ok. We have a problem."
"I'm listening," she said as she sat and calmly took the first sip of her coffee. "Ew, it's cold."
"There's a large amount of dark magic growing around the cemetery." Sirius words came in a rush.
"When you say cemetery --You mean that one?"
"Yup."
"Oh, God. Oh, Merlin. Great Wizards, Santa Claus or whoever is up there. Why me?" Exasperated, Hermione let her head fell on her desk.
"Sorry."
"You know what I really want now, Sirius? I want to open a book, you know, a thick one like these," she said pointing to the books or her desk. "Then I want to go inside this book, lose myself in its pages and then pray for someone to find the book, think it's too boring and close it and leave it on a shelf where no one is going to take it again."
"Hmm...Hermione, are you still with me here?" Sirius looked at her concerned.
Hermione grinned at him. "Ok. Sorry about that little trip inside Hermione's messed up mind. Where were we? Dark magic...Cemetery... Does anybody suspect anything?"
"I don't think so. Two members of the Order found out about a plan from the Dark Ones to try and bring Vold--I mean You-Know-Who back."
"Ah ha, if only they knew."
"I'm actually glad that they don't."
"Sure. But why are they trying to bring Him back? I mean they are doing fine without him or should I say doing bad. The Order of Phoenix, not to say the Ministry had less work when You-Know-Who was in power than they have now. Everybody knows that You-Know-Who had this little obsession with Harry. All the other dark wizards just stayed and watched. But now, there are dark activities everywhere, not only around Hogwarts. Now they just shout Avada Kedavra and then after you are already dead they ask if you are a Muggle. So why?"
Sirius didn't really have an answer for that but could always guess. "I guess it's some kind of status thing. We have the great Harry Potter. They want to have Lord Vol--"
Hermione cut him up, "Ok, right. I see your point. You don't have to say his name. So here is what we are going to do. First of all, you have to get Harry off this case. Send him on a mission to China for all I care."
"Hermione, I can't do that. Harry is the leader of the Order of the Phoenix now, remember? He is already at the head of the investigation. There's nothing I can do to stop him."
"You are right. Just one more reason why I should hate Albus Dumbledore."
Sirius glared at her.
"OK. OK. You don't need to give me that cold look. Let's forget this for now and concentrate at the task ahead. I'll see what I can do, OK? I will ask Draco."
"Malfoy??"
"Do you know any other Draco?"
"I just can't believe that you are still seeing this guy. He is a wanted criminal and he tried to kill you, Hermione. Twice."
"Oh, honestly, Sirius."
"I'm being honest. I don't trust Malfoy one bit."
"You are right, you shouldn't trust him. No one should." Hermione smiled innocently at Sirius.
"You are impossible, you know that. You see, if Harry and Ron find out about Malfoy..."
"Sirius, do you think that I'm that stupid?"
"Ok, but what if Malfoy try something stupid, like tries to kill you again."
"Oh, please. I'm the one who slapped him on the face in our third year and I'm the one who survived two attempts of murder. Don't you think that I can take care of myself?"
Sirius knew better than to try to persuade Hermione once she got her mind set. "Of course you can. You are Hermione Granger. The Girl Who No One Can Stop."
****************
"Ow. I'm so tired," said Hermione as she collapsed on her favourite armchair in front of the fire.
She felt his gentle touch as he let his hand rest on her shoulder.
"Bad day?" whispered Harry in her ear.
Hermione reached for his hand and took it before opening her eyes, just to lose her soul in his. Fighting back all her inner desires, she just smiled as she answered, "The worst. Yours?"
Harry smiled back and let go of her hand to sit at the armchair beside the one she was in. "Just the usual. Evil guys trying to conquer the world."
"Typical. Do you want to talk about it?"
Silence.
Hermione looked up at him and noticed his distant look. Sighing, she got up and stared at the picture hanging over the fireplace. The picture had none other than Harry, Ron and she smiling on the grounds of Hogwarts. She couldn't help noticing how she was smiling, truly smiling. That was something that she didn't do anymore. She wondered if Ron and Harry had realised how their smiles had changed, too.
She glanced at Harry and almost laughed at the situation. Harry didn't want to tell her what she already knew and she couldn't tell him that she already knew--that she knew so much more than him. She had been keeping so many secrets. Yes, she wanted to laugh. Laugh out of pure despair. She wanted to cry, cry out for her loss. The loss of that smile, that true smile that was no more. She couldn't and she wouldn't. Because there was a reason why she was put in Gryffindor ten years ago and that reason still remained.
Hermione kneeled before him and as her eyes met his again. All she wanted was to tell him that she was still there, that she would always be there for him. But she feared those exact words because once they had been the end of her. So she only said, "Harry...you know you can tell me. Just because I'm not in the Order anymore doesn't mean that I can't help when you need it."
Harry took a deep breath. "I know. But I also know you and how your mind works. I don't want to put you in danger again...just let me be sure of what I'm facing. I still need to put some pieces together...but I'll tell you. Not today, but eventually I will...I always do."
They smiled at each other.
"So, how about your big project?" asked Harry.
Hermione stood up abruptly and turned her back at him. "Well..."
"Hermione?" Harry was anxious for her reply.
She turned smiling. "The WIR Council approved it."
"What?? Hermione, that's amazing." Harry bolted up from his place and held Hermione up in his arms and the two of them were spinning in the middle of the living room.
Hermione was laughing with joy in his arms. She was in Heaven.
As Harry slowly stopped, he put her down then whispered, "You are amazing."
For Hermione, that was it. Who cared about the end of the world? She just needed one kiss. Just one little kiss.
"Honey, I'm home..."
"Aww!" Hermione screamed as Ron Weasley suddenly appeared in the fireplace. She quickly let go of Harry, who just welcomed his red-headed friend like nothing had happened. "Nothing happened, Hermione," she had to remind herself. "Of course Harry was acting naturally. He has no idea of your suicidal thoughts of kissing him."
And for the second time that night, Hermione Granger felt her feet leaving the floor. "Ronald Weasley, put me down!" she shouted.
Ron grinned at her. "Not before you give me my answer."
"Ron..."
"I guess it's no." Ron said as he glanced at Harry, who chuckling, nodded. "Damn, Hermione! You are really very stubborn. Just say what we know you are willing to, it's like this, 'Ron, I can't resist your charm anymore. You are just too good to be true. Yes, of course I'll marry you because I love you so much."
As Harry laughed at Ron's personification of a girl in love, Hermione rolled her eyes in annoyance.
"Ron, put me down, please." Ron frowned, but did as she asked. "Thank you. Now, how many times we had this conversation? I thought we were over this. You p--"
"Shh -- I know what you are going to say. Merlin knows how many times we've fought over this. Well, I guess we can say that Harry knows too, since he is usually in the audience. The truth is still the same. 'Mione, I love you." Hermione was about to protest but he stopped her and went on, "I know that you are going to say that it's not love; that it's some kind of crazy best friend obsession and I would gladly fight with you again because the whole Wizard World knows how we love to fight. However, can't we just do this tomorrow? I'm starving here, not to say tired...you know how much I hate that big Muggle flying thing."
"Okay. This can wait. But tomorrow..."
"Tomorrow I'm all yours, My 'Mione." Ron said and gave her a kiss on the cheek. He then turned and said, "So Harry..."
Hermione watched as Ron and Harry crossed the hall. As always, Ron was acting like he had spent a month away and not only twenty-four hours, asking Harry all the kind of nonsense questions one could ask. It looked like things had never changed.
"What? You and Ginny? Again?" she heard Ron ask loudly.
But looks could deceive.
"Hermione. Aren't you coming?"
Everything had changed.
"Oh, Merlin, help me," Hermione whispered to herself as she followed the two young wizards who she knew loved her.