Author's Note: First of all, I'd like to thank you all so much for your reviews!!! For that last chapter, I received by far the most reviews I ever had on any one chapter of this fic, and I was so happy! It really makes writing worth. Thank you guys for your kind words and support, along with constructive criticism. I apologize once again for my lack of beta reader, I really need to go about finding one, but I'd rather get you new chapters in the mean time until I get one, so please forgive typos here and there. I feel that I did a pretty good job with this chapter, but there are always a few mistakes that I don't see until it's uploaded. Thanks guys! Enjoy!!! J
Disclaimer: The usual…I'm not JK Rowling, clearly.
Chapter 7 - Desperate Measures
Hermione felt like she was in a dream, as reality was far too sweet to be real at the moment. She knew she should be protesting, that if she was a far better person she would push Harry away immediately, and perhaps slap him for added drama, but she couldn't and really had no desire to either of these things.
The unexpected kiss had been very light at first, but as Harry sensed no resistance from Hermione, it became more forceful, certainly not in a bad way. Hermione felt as though she had turned to liquid, as her body seemed to melt against Harry. All the years she had known him, she had always privately wondered why it would be like to kiss him, to have him hold her this close. Of course he hugged her before, but she had never been pressed up against him and kissing him the way that she was now.
It was entirely indecent, since she was still dating Harry's best friend, but her conscience seemed to be on vacation at the moment. The lack of guilt was more than slightly discomforting, but frankly she didn't care. She kissed him back, with a passion that surprised even herself, and she felt Harry smile against her lips. Her arms seemed to loop themselves around his neck of their own accord and her fingers entwined themselves in his dark, soft hair that was unruly as ever. His long, cool fingers reverently caressed her cheek.
After some time, she regretfully pulled away from him. She could hear his slightly labored breathing which matched her own. Thankfully Harry wasn't hooked up to any sort of monitoring equipment or they surely would have set off some alarm. She could feel the heat of gaze on her and her cheeks warming in response, but couldn't meet his eyes. She looked down at her hands, now folded in her lap, and sighed softly. Long concealed, carefully suppressed emotions were now spilling over within her, and the feeling quite overwhelming. What surprised her the most was that she had yet to feel even the slightest twinge of remorse from her actions.
"Harry, I'm quite speechless… for once," she whispered, her voice filled with a whole assortment of feelings, unable to anything more than utter his name. Hermione looked up her brown eyes locked with his brilliant emerald ones, causing a shiver to run up her spin.
"Hermione, I know what a prat I was to kiss you like that, but I had to do it. I had to show you how I feel. I'm sorry if I just botched this whole situation up further," he said looking quite apologetic, but also slightly smug if she wasn't mistaken. "After all, you're dating my best friend, who I don't remember but probably shouldn't be trying to steal you from."
"Oh, Harry, it was the both of us. I could have hexed you quite thoroughly if I wanted to you know, but I decided against it," she told him, her lips twisting into a wry smile.
"I'm pretty glad that you didn't choose that option. The kiss was far better." His eyes flashed mischievously.
"It probably wasn't the best idea though. I shouldn't have done that. You'll be remembering everything really soon, and I'm just probably messing with your head and emotions in ways that I shouldn't be," she said, looking up and catching the glare of one of the Healers walking down the halls. It was well past visiting hours, she was surprised no one had forced her out of the room. Maybe they were willing to been rules for any visitors of Harry Potter's. She smiled ruefully to herself.
"Hermione, my head's a mess already, what will a little extra confusion hurt, you know. I'm already nutters."
Hermione sighed, and pressed the tips of her fingers to her temples, trying to clear her mind for a moment, trying to hold back the wave of emotion threatening to overtake her at any moment.
"I really, really have to go, Harry," she said dully, failing to come up with a better farewell, glancing at the clock above his head. She had tried to sound nonchalant but had failed miserably. Her visit with Harry had been very good and very bad all at once. He grabbed her arm as she stood.
"You have to promise that you won't stay away so long this time. Right now, you're all I have. Please, don't let what happened keep you away. I swear I won't kiss you again," Harry told her.
Hermione smiled, and impetuously leaned and planted a firm kiss on his mouth, feeling a sob rising in her throat as she stepped back. "Maybe it's not yourself you should be worried about Harry," she said with a humorless smile. "Don't worry, I'll be here."
"Okay," he said simply and she could see in his face that he didn't' doubt her.
She grabbed her handbag and clutched it tightly, unable to turn to look at him again as she left his room. Entering the hallway she ran to the hallway, ignoring the confused and annoyed looks of people making the night rounds to check on the other patients on Harry's floor. She had to get home and sort things out in her mind. Harry thought his mind was cluttered, hers was far worse.
Apparating the moment she got out of St. Mungo's, she had never been more relieved to get home.
She kicked off her trainers and closed the door behind her before climbing the stairs to her room. She put her hand to her mouth, gently touching her fingertips to her lips. Harry's kiss was still on them, as though he just kissed her a few seconds ago. Quickly she stripped off her clothes and threw on an overlarge t-shirt, before sliding under the covers of her welcoming bed. The world felt so much less complicated and confusing in the safety of her home and warm bed. She felt Crookshanks jump up on the bed beside her and his purring as he settled himself into the curve of her body. She bit her lip hard, willing back the tears that had been attempting to come ever since she bid Harry goodnight. Trying not to think of any of the night's events, she focused on her cat's purring and gratefully felt herself drifting asleep.
She woke long before her alarm went off or the sun had reason, not even the hazy glow of dawn had begun to light up the sky. Groaning she turned over. Sleep had been a welcome release from the workings of her mind. Now that she was awake she couldn't block out what had happened last night forever.
At least it was a Saturday, and she didn't have to go into work. She really couldn't face anyone today. After last night she felt as though she had shown her whole hand, when she really didn't know how things would work out once the curse released Harry from its hold. The Harry with a memory genuinely lover her, but what would happen when his memory returned. Would he go back to Ginny? That questioned she realized had been haunting her from the first time she had seen Harry after the curse hit him. She hated not knowing what was going to happen, she was Hermione Granger after all, wasn't she was supposed to know everything?
Before she would have been ready to deal with the next blow to come; now she wasn't so sure. Ron loved her, and she had once been so very certain that she loved him, but one kiss had made everything come undone. Had she been settling when she chose Ron? It sounded horrible, even just within the private confines of her mind, but there it was. She stomach twisted, she felt worse than she had after she had after riding Buckbeak the Hippogriff. How could she face Ron now?
After lay there for a time, staring out the window, she finally fell asleep again for a while, the ring of her mobile phone jarred her back awake. Frowning, she flipped open her phone to see who was calling. Her eyes were still too tired to read the glowing display on the phone.
"Hello?" she said sleepily, still only half-awake.
"Hermione! Sorry, seems like I woke you up, thought you wouldn't be asleep anymore, you're always awake at some crazy hour even on weekends," Ron far too chipper voice said on the other end.
Hermione silently groaned. Of all the people she couldn't deal with today, Ginny was number one, followed closely by Ron.
"Yes, Ronald, I was still asleep. I've been working quite late these past few weeks you know, I thought I deserved to sleep in," she snapped sitting up in bed and leaning her head back against the headboard.
"Sorry, Hermione, I didn't mean to make you go mental on me," he said in a joking tone, but she could tell that he was hurt. Her stomach twisted queasily and she frowned, there was that elusive guilt.
"S'okay, Ron I've just been having a dreadful week," she explained quickly.
"Yeah, I cottoned on to that, Hermione. Really, I'm sorry to bother you, but I need you to come over today, soon as you can. There is some news about Harry that I need to talk to you and Ginny about. The Healer called early this morning." Hermione heart came to a screeching halt before resuming its rhythm in double time.
"Ron? Is everything okay? Why didn't you call me sooner?!?" she demanded.
"Whoa there Hermione, I didn't mean to panic you, everything is fine, and there are just some things the Healer needs me to discuss with you and Ginny."
"Okay, I'll be over as soon as I can."
Hermione arrived at the Burrow shortly before Ginny, who came in the door only a few minutes after Hermione settled herself in a chair by the fire. At least it saved her from having to make a lot of awkward small talk with Ron. She was guessing that Ginny was the type to sleep in all the time based on her appearance. It irked her slightly that Ginny still managed to look pretty, despite the fact that she was dressed in an older jumper and jeans, her coppery hair pulled into a loose bun. The annoyance that was written across her face certainly did nothing for her looks though.
"Really, Ronald, it is 8 in the bloody morning. This better be important," she announced as she sat on the couch across from her brother.
Ron mumbled something indistinct under his breath, and Hermione was certain she heard a nice assortment of profanity amongst his grumblings.
"I swear you have the memory of pygmy puff, Ginny. It's something about Harry, I told you on the phone," Ron said in irritation. He took a large bit of the piece of toast covered in jam that he had been snacking on when Hermione had first come in.
"Well, stop cramming things in your mouth and tell us what's going on. I've yet to develop any clairvoyant abilities. "
Hermione shot Ginny a malevolent look, which she pointedly ignored. Ron put down his food, looking longingly at the remaining pieces of toast on his plate.
"Well, I went to see Harry this morning, and the Healer told me they're kind of lost as to what this curse is, but seeing as it's been a couple weeks and Harry has yet to show any signs of having any other reactions to the curse, he figures Harry can be released."
"But", Ron added quickly, "He can't go back to his flat. The Healers still don't know how and when Harry's memory will come back and even what will happen when it does, but he doesn't think Harry should be alone."
Ginny perked up considerably. "Well, he can stay with me of course. After all we were practically engaged and he was over at my house, all the time." She smiled smugly as she added the last bit. Hermione almost expected her to clap with joy like a 5 year old getting a new dolly.
She briefly considering throwing one of Ron's jam covered pieces of toast at Ginny but decided against it. Why stoop so low?
"Well, that was what I suggested, but they didn't go for it, Ginny. After all to Harry you're pretty much a stranger. They think that Harry should be with Hermione," Ron told her.
"No!" Hermione and Ginny said in unison.
Ron and Ginny both looked at Hermione in surprise.
"What's wrong with you, Hermione? Don't you want to help Harry?" Ron asked in confusion.
"Yes, but…" Hermione began. "Yes, but I find Harry incredibly sexy and may not be able to keep myself from sleeping with him," her mind finished for her. Hermione bit her lip and shifted in her seat uncomfortably.
This wasn't going to be good.