Sorting It Out
Chapter 31
Sorting It Out
For the next several weeks, seven weeks, three days four hours and twenty-two minutes, if he were counting, Harry kept himself busy setting up his department. Hermione had stopped over many times, however Harry had made avoiding her into an art form.
During a rare day that Harry stayed home from work, his afternoon kip was interrupted by a tugging on his sleeve. "Harry Potter, sir, Miss is wanting to talk to you. She is begging Dobby to be getting you. What is Harry Potter wanting Dobby to be doing?"
Harry's resolve crumbled. He sighed with indecision, wishing desperately that he hadn't taken the day off. Hermione approached the sofa where he lay. "Thank you, Dobby. I appreciate you showing me in…"
"But, Miss!" the house elf shrieked. "Harry Potter, sir, isn't saying he is wanting to talk to you. Dobby is most sorry, Harry Potter, sir. Harry Potter is right to punish Dobby."
"You've done nothing wrong, Dobby, and I don't punish you. Miss Granger tends to forget that she is an uninvited guest." Harry said evenly. One look at her face let him know that his comment had hit its mark.
She asked hesitantly, "May I talk to you, Harry?"
Harry covered his mouth to suppress a yawn and nodded.
"Did I wake you?" she inquired, feeling thrilled that she had succeeded in getting this far. The fact that he had only just awakened was a bonus.
"Yeah, what did you want?" he replied not looking at her and not rising from his prone position.
"I thought about everything you said. You were absolutely right about everything. My only excuse is that I was so…I don't know what I was…temporarily insane just about covers it." Harry gave a small humorless laugh. Hermione kneeled by the couch, looked into his eyes and said "I'm really sorry, Harry, for not trusting in you, for acting as if I were the only one involved, for everything."
"I projected my own insecurities onto you, then believed my own lies." She paused. When Harry didn't say a word, she added, "I was devastated when I lost the baby. I felt so alone…and...I didn't have to be. I've missed you so much, Harry. I want so badly to be the one who gives you the family you've wished for. I want us to be alright again. I'll do anything, I swear it. If you want to try again for a child right away, then drop your jeans and let's get on with it. I know I told you I would always be there for you, now let me promise that I will let you be there for me. I know it doesn't seem like it, but I do trust you, Harry."
Harry let out a deep breath. "You don't know how much I want to believe you, Hermione…"
"Believe me…" she stated with emphasis. "I'm sorry I avoided you, Harry. I panicked when I found out about the baby. I was scared and confused and felt I needed to sort it out for myself before I brought you in on it. I know how much you wanted a family. I want that, too. It was just such a surprise that I went a little mad. I didn't ever mean that the baby was a mistake or that I didn't want it. Please don't think I meant that. When you asked if I could I would do something about it, I didn't mean I could kill our child. I could never do that. This child was such an abstract concept to me at the time. I didn't have anything straight in my head. With my crazy hours at St Mungo's, I wasn't thinking clearly anyway. I wanted so badly for you to hold me and tell me everything would be fine, but yet I was afraid, too. Afraid you'd be angry with me; afraid you'd…I don't know exactly. Can you forgive me?
"Of course I can forgive you, Hermione. That was never in question. It just won't happen overnight. I can't say I can forget this ever happened because I don't want to. For a brief period of time I was a father. I had a family. I was finally normal. I wish I'd known about it when you were pregnant, because I'd have been the happiest bloke on the planet. Having a child with you is a dream come true for me. It hurt so badly that you kept it from me. I didn't know what to think. I tried everything I could think of to get your attention to no avail. I've told you all of this, I know, but it felt like I was a kid again, trying desperately to get the Dursley's to accept me, to love me; hell, I'd have settled for toleration. Everything I did I was belittled for. If I passed a test, it was because I was trying to show up Dudley and get punished. If I did my work too fast, I was up to something and get punished, usually by getting tossed into my cupboard. I had the same feelings of 'What did I do wrong?', so I went a little mad myself. I am so sorry you didn't think I'd be there for you."
"You don't have to…"
"Let me finish, please. I do have to apologize. If in some way I made you feel threatened; that made you feel as if you couldn't tell me anything, no matter what it was, good or bad, then I do owe you an apology."
"No, you don't. I was totally in the wrong and didn't have faith in you. I underestimated you. You have been nothing but wonderful to me. You don't know how much I loved the flowers and presents. They would have really brightened my day if I had let them. Thank you for not giving up on me. I am so sorry that once we'd talked I didn't give you the time you needed to digest everything. I promise I'll make all of this up to you. I am so sorry…I know I can't earn back your trust overnight, but I'm willing to do work at it. I'll go ninety percent, if only you'd meet me the other ten."
"Fifty percent is all I've ever wanted," he replied.
"I know we have loads of things to work out, but what did you think about the idea of us having a baby together?" she asked.
Harry thought a minute before responding. "I think what I've always thought. While I'd prefer to wait until after we are married, if it happens, then it just means that our baby couldn't wait to meet us."
"That's a beautiful way to look at it. You never cease to amaze me. I am also very sorry that you saw me crying on Alex' shoulder. You were right about that, too. It should have been yours..."
Every day for the next week, the couple met at Harry's house for dinner and afterwards, Harry floating in his brace, Hermione walking, went hand in hand into Hogsmeade, had a butterbeer from Madam Rosmerta, then strolled back. Finally on Friday, upon returning to Harry's garden, he leaned down and kissed her.
Saturday night rolled around. After dinner, rather than the nightly stroll, Harry removed his brace and came upon a brilliant idea, in his opinion. "Hermione…" he began. "…do you have a swimming costume at home?"
"Yes…why?" she replied.
"I wanted to show you something in the tub upstairs and thought it wouldn't be as presumptuous if we wore them."
"Thank you for thinking of my modesty, but you've seen me in my knickers before. That will do fine." she responded.
Harry called Dobby to start the bath, so Harry could just apparate in, neither crawling like a slug nor risking his legs.
"Harry Potter's bath is just the way he is liking it, sir." said diminutive the house elf.
"Thanks, Dobby. I'll meet you in there" he told Hermione before he apparated away.
Harry apparated into the pool fully dressed. He started removing his wet clothes and banishing them in turn over to the towel rack.
Hermione came in wearing his dressing gown. She removed it slowly to reveal the most exquisite lingerie Harry had ever laid eyes on. He could tell she was enjoying his reaction. He knew he was playing right into her hands. He didn't care. By morning, if he had his way, they'd once again be making wedding plans.
She started down the steps of the pool. He crossed to meet her. Her eyes went wide as she saw he was walking.
"It's been awhile," he said softly. "But I remember how it is done."
"That's amazing, Harry!" she cried.
"I don't know how it would go without the water taking the bulk of my weight, but I reckon it is good practice. When Healer Strankford told me I was at 52%, I reckoned I was safe to try it out."
"I can't wait to tell him! It's an amazing idea for exercise, Harry! Well done."
Harry blushed at her praise. "Come over to the steps and I'll show you what else I can do." He said as he led her back to the stairs. He sat down on a higher step and allowed her the lower one. He wrapped his arms around hers and laid his head against her bushy brown curls. "I don't want to talk about anything more yet, please. I just want to hold you. I just want to enjoy this."
"Alright," she agreed thinking of how much she was enjoying this herself. She turned her head and captured his lips in a scorching kiss. She probed his lips with her tongue. He didn't back away or refuse her.
When things got a bit too heated, she levitated him out of the pool.
"Hermione!" Harry protested loudly. "You can't just levitate me about the house starkers! Remus stops in…Ron could come over…Winky…Merlin forbid!"
"You started this and I intend to continue until it reaches its finale--without drowning! And if you don't want to call attention to yourself, stop shouting!" she retorted with mirth. She knew he could levitate himself easily; however she couldn't resist toying with him.
Harry awoke early even for him. If his bladder wasn't protesting so loudly, he would've loved to lie here and watch her sleep. She looked so very peaceful, with none of the stresses of the past few months. Nature was calling very insistently, nevertheless, and Harry wasn't sure what to do. He'd left the brace in the other loo. Summoning would take to long; if he apparated, he'd end up hurting himself; he'd thrown away the urinals, and he desperately needed a solution.
"What's wrong?" came the sleepy voice next to him.
"Nothing, love. Go back to sleep." he replied. He couldn't tell her that! He wondered if 'Evanesco' would work.
"Tell me, please. Did you have a nightmare?"
"No…" he stated curtly, his irritation rising. He didn't have time to discuss this now.
"Accio brace," he stated figuring it was his best chance.
"Where are you going that you need the brace? The balcony?" she asked fully awake now.
"No!" he retorted.
The brace approached flying through the air. Harry caught it easily and in his haste was having trouble fastening it.
"Here, let me help you," she offered.
"Just hurry, please…" he begged. Hermione then knew what the problem was and why Harry was reluctant to discuss it.
Within seconds, the brace was fastened and Harry was gone.
He floated back into the bedroom to find Hermione wide awake. "You could have told me you had to use the loo. I wouldn't have thought less of you..." she said slightly irritated.
"I reckon I could have if I wasn't trying so hard not to embarrass myself," he shot back.
"You don't have to do everything alone. I could've helped. I am a certified Healer after all." she snapped.
"How could I forget?"
She gave him a mock glare. "Are you off today?"
"Not totally," he responded. "I need to go over some more C.V.'s for the other positions, but I can grab them and bring them back here later."
"I finally have the day off, so I can help you, if you want." she offered.
"Thanks," replied Harry as he summoned his clothes for the day.
"I think your wandless magic is very sexy" she purred at him, running a fingernail up and down his bare chest. "On the days when we were evaluating your magical ability and power, I kept getting distracted. I'd see the numbers going up higher than any I'd ever seen before and think of myself causing you to lose control; how only I could harness that power and control it. I'd almost get dizzy with desire." She was driving him mad just listening to her, so he found a way to quiet her.
An hour later, Hermione tugged Harry down the steps hastily and into the kitchen for breakfast. Hermione's usual toast and coffee were waiting, along with muffins of every imaginable flavor.
"Mr. Lupin, sir, is requesting muffins this morning, Master Potter. Mr. Lupin says Master Potter is craving muffins, so Winky is making plenty. Master Potter is being too thin. Master Potter is needing feeding up."
Harry and Hermione shared a look at Lupin's joke. Harry chose a chocolate chip muffin and ate it in a couple of bites and reached for another, blueberry this time.
"Good morning all…" said Lupin cheerily as he entered the kitchen. "Did everyone get things sort it out?"
"We're working on it…" replied Harry. "How was your date?"
"Perfectly wonderful," stated Tonks as she entered behind Lupin. "It's good to see you guys back together, boss. You look happy."
"Thanks, Tonks," replied Harry. "Remus, are you going into the office today?"
"I thought I might head in for a bit. Is there something you need me to do?" Lupin answered.
"If you are going in anyway, I was hoping you could bring those stacks of C.V's on the filing cabinet. I need to make some decisions on that and I could do it just as easily from here."
"I'd be happy to," replied Lupin. "I also want to check to see if the verdict on Malfoy is in. Rumor has it that he's mad. I'd like to go over the transcripts soon."
"So would I, but I can't until the trial is completely done. You and Tonks review it next week and fill me in once it's done."
"Yes, boss," answered Tonks.
"And don't call me 'boss'!" shouted Harry.
"Yes, boss…" cheeked Tonks with a wink. Harry rolled his eyes at her as Hermione giggled.
"I stopped by last night," stated Lupin. Harry immediately turned a dark shade of red. "I heard shouting, but it was something about nude levitation. Do I want to know what that was about?"
"Ooooooh" squealed Tonks. "Bossman was getting kinky! Let's have some details, girl!" she stated to Hermione, while Harry threw a muffin at Lupin.
"Oh it was nothing…" replied Hermione. "Harry was trying to drown me in the bathtub, so I sent him straight to bed."
Tonks snorted. "You're no fun. On the other hand, levitation during sex might have possibilities…" Harry's eyes went glossy at that memory.
"You are trying to kill me!" objected Lupin with a laugh. Winky tried desperately to cover her long ears to no avail and kept working.
"We'd best be off. The boss is a slave driver. We don't want to be caught slacking..." said Tonks.
"Say, Tonks," started Harry. "Are you going to come by later?"
"I can if you want," she replied.
"Yes, please," he answered. "I've got Remus bringing by some C.V's. for a couple of other positions. I'd like you to go through them with me, if you've got an hour or so."
"Sure thing, boss. What time?"
"Whenever…" he replied. Hermione cleared her throat loudly and Harry added, "Or just come for dinner. We can look at them after." He looked to Hermione for approval. She smiled sweetly.
After Harry had finished his fourth (or was it fifth?) muffin, he led Hermione to the stairs and let Hermione drag him up to the balcony off his room. Hermione shared his chaise with them. She felt like she could say the things she wanted to say more easily if they were touching. "I really am sorry, Harry. I was very unfair to you and…"
Harry interrupted her. "Do you really want to continue to argue about who was in the wrong and who deserved more blame or can we skip right to more make up sex?"
Hermione slapped at his arm. "Is that all you think about?" she chided.
"What can I say?" he teased. "You bring out the best in me, or is it beast?"
"Fancy another bath?" she asked.
"No!" he stated firmly. "You are not sending me about starkers in broad daylight. I nearly choked when Lupin said he stopped by and when!" Harry laughed.
"I know!" agreed Hermione giggling then she turned serious. "Harry?" she asked.
"What is it?" he requested.
"Will you marry me?" she asked with trepidation.
"Wherever…whenever" he responded and summoned her engagement ring. After placing it back onto her finger where it belonged, he kissed her gently. She leaned above him to deepen the kiss, and then pulled back when he started on her blouse buttons. "Harry, we can't do this here?"
"Why not?" he asked. "I've had a word with the owner of the property and he thinks it's a splendid idea. Besides, I've wanted to do this here for ages."
"In broad daylight?"
"Even better…" he answered replacing his fingers with his mouth.
She mumbled her appreciation of his actions.
"Oh! Sorry!" they heard from the field. The couple looked up to see their other best friend speeding away as fast as his broom would go.
Hermione once again slapped Harry on the arm. "That's why I said not out here! Your house is bloody King's Cross!"
"I don't care! This is my house. Certain people can stop popping in without notice or risk it. Now, where was I?"
"Oh, no you don't!" Hermione complained. "We either take this party inside or it ends right here."
"Alright…alright" Harry gave in with a pout.
"At least until after dark." Hermione added and was rewarded with a wicked grin.