The Trouble with Love-Chapter 1
"Hermione, will this work?" asked Harry.
"Of course it will, Harry. Trust me," she said as Harry pushed his trunk while carrying Hedwig's cage and his broom toward the door at No. 4 Privet Drive. "Now don't act suspiciously."
Harry squinted at her with a look of confused disdain as she said this. He thought, "How in the world do I not look suspicious when I feel suspicious?" He wanted to scream due to the nervous energy filling him.
He opened the door as he had each of the five years previously. He ignored everyone and began his ascent to his room, waiting for the inevitable jibes that would come from either Dudley or Uncle Vernon. Five steps up, it started.
"Ah, Harry, we were wondering if tonight wasn't the night you would ruin our summer. I expect you to be quiet and speak only when spoken to while in my house. There will be none of the shenanigans that went on the past couple years," chided Uncle Vernon.
"I'll smash your face in Potter if you get out of line," said Dudley.
Harry found himself hoping and praying for the knock at the door soon before he jinxed Dudley or turned him into something horrible. The knock finally came. He hurried up the stairs to reorganize his things.
"Hello, is this the Dursley residence?" said the young woman. "I'm Hermione, Harry's girlfriend. Please don't be angry with him, he didn't know I was coming. I came to ask your permission to take Harry home with us for a while this summer. I know you must have put in a great deal of time getting ready for a summer house guest."
Harry stood at the top of the stairs snickering as he took his robes and school-specific things out of the chest and threw them on his bed in his room. She was brilliant. She knew exactly how to plead with Uncle Vernon in a sweet voice to get what she wanted. Harry knew it was no big task in this case.
"Well, it is a bit of an imposition now that we have prepared Dudley's second bedroom for him for the summer," lied Uncle Vernon.
"Well, it's just that Harry has told us that you have been so supportive in spite of the horrible things that happened here on occasion. I know you think he doesn't respect you, but he told me he wished he could find a place to go that wouldn't inconvenience you," said Hermione sweetly. "I talked with my parents and they agree that we and the Weasleys could do very well taking Harry for part of the summer. Would you object?"
Harry had crept down the stairs to see the look on their faces. Aunt Petunia had joined them in the foyer as Hermione told him of her plan. She nodded her assent to Uncle Vernon. Harry wanted to burst into laughter. The Dursleys' attempts to hide their jubilance at the thought of Harry leaving made them look pathetically phony.
"Oh, so, Potter isn't a fancy boy?" said Uncle Vernon out of nowhere.
"I beg your pardon, sir?" said Hermione.
"I would have guessed that Potter was as gay as a seven-pound note," laughed Uncle Vernon to the snorting chuckles of Dudley. "I'm just surprised that he has such good taste in women." Aunt Petunia looked at her fat husband in disbelief.
"But of course, you can have the git for the summer. Good riddance, I say," said Dudley.
Hermione smiled sweetly through the disgust growing at the thought of that obese middle-aged man thinking of her as attractive. "Yes, I could see how you might feel that way about Harry. He is incredibly sensitive and caring. But I suppose that's what separates him from people like you."
Suddenly, the look on Uncle Vernon's gloating face turned sour. "How do you come uninvited into my home and insult me like this?" he said.
"Was that an insult? I'm sorry. I meant that Harry is more patient, polite and friendly than the two manly men of the Dursley household," said Hermione sweetly again. "Harry could be a terrible inconvenience to your machismo. Certainly, Harry's mother's sister knew how to pick the broad shouldered manly types when she met you. Umm, you sure must have been some catch." She dug at him uncharacteristically.
"By the way, I think the first time someone came to fetch Harry was at the beginning of his first year, is that right?" she asked.
Uncle Vernon nodded, "So?"
"I think that it was our dear old friend Hagrid. Hagrid is not nearly as refined and polite as I am and his failed attempt to turn Dudley into a pig simply generated a tail. I assure you that I wouldn't make that mistake. I will turn him into a full-fledged hog and transport him instantly to the slaughterhouse if Harry doesn't get some help getting his belongings ready for us to leave rather soon," said Hermione with a sickly sweet venom in her voice without batting an eye.
"No, that's not necessary, Hermione. I have everything. Don't ever think that you can intimidate me or ridicule me again, Dursley. I don't have to listen to your rubbish. And, just for the record, if we did send Dudley to the slaughterhouse we wouldn't be able to tell which hog he was. He would be slaughtered like an animal. No one would ever believe such a preposterous story. So keep in mind who and what you're dealing with," said Harry angrily. "You are lucky that I never hated you enough to get that kind of revenge."
Hermione interjected the final thought as Harry opened the door. "Harry is the most caring and dutiful friend a person could ever have and you missed the opportunity to be better people for it," she said sadly. She added, "Thank you ever so much for letting dear, sweet Harry spend the summer with us. You are too kind," she said smiling and for the first time almost tripping over the words in laughter.
Harry and Hermione each grabbed a side of the trunk. "Thirty seconds," she said. "I was afraid I was going to have to grab it while we were in the house. I told Fred that we needed more time to make sure they got their comeuppance."
Harry could feel the spinning sensation associated with a portkey. The only worry anyone had was to be clear of the landing zone when the heavy trunk thudded to earth in the backyard of the Burrow. Luckily no one was in its path as Harry and Hermione took a lesson from their travels to the Quidditch World Cup, floating effortlessly in behind the trunk carrying Hedwig in his cage.
Ron and the twins were sitting in the garden awaiting their arrival. "Okay, don't leave anything out," said an excited Fred as they walked over to the table laughing.
"They were pathetic," began Harry as he recounted the story. "Hermione was brilliant."
"That old goat deserved a bit of his own medicine I should think," said Ron. "What's the matter Hermione?"
"Nothing really," she said in a thoughtful tone. "Oh, I suppose it really is something I said to them that made me sad. They did have Harry in their home for nine almost ten years and never once looked to see what a great person he was. It makes me sad that Harry`s relatives are such jerks."
"What surprised me was that you and Ron knew he couldn't help but make fun of me in some way. How did you two know that it would happen that way?" asked Harry.
"My Dad said something to me once about your Uncle Vernon," said Ron. "It was right after the time Fred and George left the engorging candies in the house for Dudley. He said, `That man hates Harry and I don't know why. He will never let Harry out of his sight without first trying to humiliate him.' I trust my Dad's instincts so I was sure of it."
"I guess none of us should be surprised at people's ability to do cruel things to one another," said George with a devilish grin. "Even us."
Harry wasn't sure if Hermione and Ron felt the same twinge in their stomachs as George spoke. He couldn't help but feel that he had lived by the old saying, "One bad turn, deserves another." He hated being hurtful.
Hermione looked at George. "Why did you have to say that, George?"
"Well, it's true isn't it? We got them good," he reiterated.
"Some people will never get it, I guess," said Hermione. "I feel terrible now to think of it that way."
Harry smiled and kept walking. He knew there was a reason why he, Hermione and Ron were best friends. They shared the same values--even if they were different than George's or Fred's. He put his belongings away and returned sometime later to the campfire Ron built in the backyard just as the sun went down.
It was just Harry, Ron and Hermione sitting at the fire. Hermione was leaning back into Ron's chest as Ron sat with his back to the overturned picnic table they were using to lean against. "So, would you have ever imagined that we could have peace and quiet together like this?" asked Ron.
"Probably not," said Harry. Harry stretched out on the ground and looked at the stars. The Burrow was just far enough from the little town of Ottery St. Catchpole that the lights didn't obliterate some of the more distant stars. "You know, the light from some of the stars we see tonight began the journey through space before any of us were born."
"Wow, cosmic," laughed Hermione. "What in the world made you bring that up?"
Harry lay quietly trying to think of a way to explain it without going into too much detail about Horcruxes and Lord Voldemort but gave up realizing they would guess what he was talking about anyway. "Don't you ever think about how this whole mess with Voldemort began before we were even conceived and born? I mean, I am somehow `the chosen one' who has to shoulder the whole business of finding these Horcruxes alone and the evil that inspired it began before I could have even been responsible for it."
Harry wished he hadn't said that almost as soon as it came from his mouth.
"Harry, you're not alone," said Ron. "I told you that Hermione and I are with you wherever you have to go. As far as that goes, you were the one who made it your responsibility. Even if I agree with you about not involving Ginny anymore, there is no reason for you to be alone."
There was a lot more going on here than what was being said and Harry knew it. Ron and Hermione didn't know a lot of what he knew. And there was no way they could know the full story about why he separated himself from Ginny.
"Harry, tell me again. Why would you want to shun the one person who could help you emotionally?" asked Hermione.
"No, let's not go there again Hermione," said Ron. "He loves to show how special he is and how famous he is. Sometimes he just acts like a martyr and it pisses me off."
"Ronald, that's mean," said Hermione sitting up quickly and using her elbow to viciously dig into Ron's ribs as she moved away
"Hmpf," gasped Ron as Hermione's elbow found its mark. "Damn it, Hermione. That hurt."
Harry sat up for a second and looked at Ron. He almost understood where Ron was coming from and he wasn't really as offended as Hermione was at the notion. Yet, something in Ron's tone was uncomfortably vindictive. "Ron, I don't want to be alone, but what are you going to do? Volunteer your family and Hermione as targets for Voldemort so I'm not alone. If you're not then I am alone in many ways, whether you like it or not."
"Harry, there are hundreds of people working tirelessly to end this war. Why do you have to think that the stupid prophecy means anything? My brother Bill says that the prophecy only exists because Voldemort and you are acting as if it means something. I think you said that Dumbledore told you that too. So, quit bullshitting about this, `the chosen one' crap." Ron seemed more upset than Harry could understand at the moment.
"I'm sorry you feel that way, Ron." Harry couldn't think of anything else to say to the flow of criticism his best mate had just laid on him.
Ron got up and looked at Hermione and then back at Harry as if he just realized he was out of line. "Look, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to be such an arse. I said some things there that I shouldn't have because I'm worried, Harry. I made you a promise that I'd help you, but I've had nightmares about this whole thing and it's wearing on me. I don't need to be dealing with this everyday while you're here. I'll be okay. Really, I am sorry for going off like that Harry."
"Nightmares?" asked Harry.
"Yes, I haven't said anything to either of you because they're stupid, but they make me feel sick to my stomach like now. I'm not in a very good mood right now because of it, so I'm going to go back to my room and try to get some sleep. I am sorry for what I said Harry. I mean about you personally. I know it's not your fault." Ron took Hermione by the hand as she stood and they gave each other a rather sibling-like kiss on the cheek.
Hermione came over a little closer to Harry after Ron left. "He really cares about you, Harry. He hates seeing you get all the credit though. I think he still feels a little like a sidekick to a comic book hero." Hermione joked. Harry laughed.
"He shouldn't feel that way at all. He's my best mate and I'm sure I'd have gone crazy long before now without his friendship," said Harry staring at the fire now.
"I know, I've told him that before too." Hermione replied.
Harry looked at Hermione. "Are you and Ron okay?"
"What are you talking about? Sure, why would you ask a question like that?" Hermione looked flustered as she flipped her hair back out of her face.
"I mean Ginny kisses Fred more passionately than that," said Harry with a smirk. He thought Hermione would laugh at that because everyone gave Ron hell for not paying enough attention to Hermione. She didn't laugh or even smile. Instead, she shook her head.
Harry couldn't tell if he saw Hermione blush or not. "Ron has a bit of a problem showing me affection in public. I don't want to look like a tramp in public either though. I don't get it."
"Only in public? Come on, Hermione, that looked like Fleur kissing the air when she greets us. You mean to tell me he's actually kissed you in private?" Harry was having a bit of fun at Hermione's expense at the moment.
"Okay, Harry, yes, we made out the other night in common room after everyone went to sleep. There! Are you happy now?" she asked kind of testily.
Harry was floored. "Ron Weasley actually kissed you like he meant it?"
"Come on, Harry. Stop it. Yes, he did. Even if I had to coax him and threaten to break up with him if he didn't," she admitted. "The funny thing is that he's not a bad kisser and it was kind of enjoyable. Do you know what his problem is?"
"You know, I don't really, Hermione. He talks about you all the time so I know he's crazy about you. It's either you or Quidditch that he talks about these days," said Harry. "But he acts as if he's afraid you'll leave him."
"You're kidding, right?" Hermione whispered loudly as if she'd been hit with a bludger and all the air for talking had come out of her. "You have to be kidding."
"No, Hermione," he said. He thought for a moment. "You know, maybe it's just that he's so excited around you that he's afraid to offend you. I mean I remember feeling that way about Cho. I wanted to kiss her and not stop there. The trick was that I couldn't even figure out how to get to the kissing part without my heart jumping out of my chest. It's just different when you really, really like someone sometimes."
"You'd think he'd have gotten over that with Lavender Brown," she said with disgust. "He had a handful of her flesh more times than I can count while he snogged her and I can't get him to run his hands through my hair while we're lounging about."
"That's my point, Hermione. He would kill another guy if they treated you the way he treated Lavender, so he feels guilty wanting to touch you like that. At least that's what I think." Harry explained. He thought it was a reasonable explanation because even though he and Ginny had progressed fairly quickly, he was uncomfortable until she actually kind of invited him to touch her. He always made sure to treat her like a lady and he was sure that Ron was dealing with that in regard to Hermione.
"The more I think of it, Hermione. The more I'm sure that's what's happening. He can't believe what's happening to him yet. I don't think he knows what to do with emotional end of the whole sex thing." Harry offered.
"Maybe you're right, but that's a whole lot of pressure to put on yourself when you could just talk to the person you're with," said Hermione. "Why don't guys like to talk about sex before they try to do it with you?" This time Harry was sure he saw her blush. "I mean, McClaggan was all over me and acted like should just fall on my back and let him have his way. We were only together for a few days. Viktor was more subtle, but he just wanted to get in my pants in the end too."
Harry was hearing more than he wanted to know as his heart started pounding in his chest. He'd been the same way a couple times with Ginny and she pushed him away. "You didn't let them get their way did you?"
"What kind of question is that, Harry? Of course not. Do you think I'd confide these things to you if I were jumping in bed with every guy who ever asked me out?" This time he was sure she was blushing because he could hear the hurt in her voice.
"I didn't mean it to sound like that, but I was surprised when Ginny pushed me away. I thought when you got to a certain point a girl expects you to try to do certain things," he said naively. "It's kind of a macho thing to try to get as far as you can with a girl."
"Yeah, I suppose guys do think like that. Yes, Mr. Boyfriend, I'd love to have sex for the first time on the floor of the library after hours," she said in a wry and somewhat angry voice. "That's what I mean. I hope when Ron finally figures things out he talks to me like his best friend and let's me know his intentions. I may say no, but I won't be caught off guard in a compromising situation like I would if he just started tugging at my clothes. And I don't mean he has to talk to me before we start fooling around either, spontaneous doesn't mean that you can't pause for a moment and talk."
Harry began to laugh nervously. It just struck him that here he was talking about sex with one of his best friends-a girl. He would never have guessed in a million years that he'd be having this conversation with Hermione. "I'm sorry, Hermione, but I just realized I'd better laugh because it's really kind of awkward talking to you about this."
She stopped and looked at Harry in the glow of the fire and starlight. "So, you feel weird too," she said. "I thought it was only me." She laughed with him effectively changing the subject.
"Harry, I heard it in your voice earlier. You didn't stop seeing Ginny only because of the danger to her from Voldemort, did you?" she asked rather directly.
Harry was shocked at first but the way their conversation was going, neither one of them had a really good chance at fooling the other. "Hermione, I thought about my age and hers. I know we're too young to make lifetime commitments when she is still only fifteen going on sixteen. And, I have no experience with what a family really looks like. If we stayed together much longer she wouldn't have pushed me away. Then the thing with Voldemort would really be a problem, if we somehow…well, you know."
"You mean if you got her pregnant or something?" suggested Hermione.
"Yes, sort of, I mean I would really have treated her differently if we had started having sex or whatever. I mean I thought of that and it scared me. I'm not ready for that and I'm not sure that Ginny is really the one I want for the rest of my life. Things were going too fast and then…," Harry's voice trailed. "….Dumbledore died and left me with information that scared me more. Please don't ask what that is. I've told you most of it and maybe all of it. I don't know."
He felt Hermione's hand touch his tenderly. "It's okay, Harry. I know you feel things we can't understand. Just don't shut us out for some of the same reasons you shut out Ginny. Trust that we are mature enough to understand the risks we are taking on. Don't decide for us that we don't understand what we're up against."
Harry took her hand and felt the softness of her skin. "I promise you that much Hermione, but you guys have a life together and possibly children to think about. I know your relationship hasn't gotten that far yet, but I couldn't bear the sight of watching either of you die. It would kill me inside. I mean it would literally kill my spirit to see that."
"Don't ever talk about any of us dying, Harry. It's not going to happen. Ron lied earlier. He told me about the dreams and I told him the same thing. That's why he was so angry at you. At least that's what I think the reason is. He couldn't bear to think of you dying either. You're his best mate. We'll get through this," said Hermione with the faint sound out crying in her voice. "I'm sorry Harry, but you and Ron have to believe me and trust me. We will be safe."
Hermione nestled under Harry's arm. Harry was comfortable with Hermione never once thinking anything but how nice it was to have someone warm close to him. They sat quietly for a long time looking at the images in the fire.
"Do you know why we're so close, Harry?" asked Hermione as the full moon rose over their heads signaling that it was late.
"I think I do, Hermione. We just love each other as friends without all that other stuff that ruins things. We trust each other," said Harry.
"Yep, that's it exactly. We haven't tried to make anything more out of it even when all the rumors fly about us," she said.
Harry laughed remembering the stories by Rita Skeeter and the rumors always flying around Hogwarts. "We have what everyone wants," he said.
"Yep, someone you can talk to about anything, a connection. The funny thing is that we know we can be brutally honest with each other," said Hermione.
"We are lucky, huh?" asked Harry rhetorically.
"That's the trouble with love. It blinds you to some of the openness and honesty you need to be able to enjoy the friendship that will sustain you," said Hermione. "We always have each other, Harry."
"Yes, we do," said Harry.
Hermione waved her wand and the fire began to die out slowly. The glow remained long enough for Harry and Hermione to walk arm in arm into the Weasley home bound in friendship.
-->