Chapter 11
-
Gone With the Sin
-
I love your skin
Oh, ,so white
I love your touch
Cold as ice
And I love every single tear you cry
I just love the way you're losing your life
Oh, my baby, how beautiful you are
Oh, my darling, completely torn apart
You're gone with the sin, my baby
And beautiful, you are
So gone with the sin, my darling
I adore the despair in your eyes
I worship your lips, once red as wine
And I crave for your scent, sending shivers down my spine
And I just love the way you're running out of life
"Gone With the Sin" by HIM
--
--
Harry sprung forward and knelt on the floor next to her. He put his arm around her shoulders and carefully helped her off the floor. He pointed his wand to the radio and it became silent. He gently sat her down on the bed and pulled her into an embrace. "What's wrong?" he repeated. Hermione didn't answer; she couldn't stop crying. "Just breathe Hermione." He rocked her back and forth and with his free hand wiped away her tears. He took her face in his hands and looked right into her beautiful brown eyes.
"How can you do this to me?" she whispered. She closed her eyes and tears welled over and ran down her face.
"What am I doing?" he really had no idea what she was talking about, but it hurt him deeply, the thought of her being this sad because of him. She shook off his hands, moved to the farther end of the bed and leaned against the wall. Harry did the same, and he looked perplexedly at her.
"Please tell me what's going on," he said sweetly as he took her hand in his and gently stroked it.
"I can hear you through the wall. How do you think it feels when…" she cried a little again and continued, "…when I hear your girls? Do you remember at the Three Broomsticks, you asked me not to be with Ron because we were in the next room? How do you think it feels for me?" He didn't know how to answer her. "I just can't stay here anymore," she took her hand from his. "I have to leave. It's just too hard. I have to be reminded everyday of how you are over me, and I… well I just never got over you Harry. I hurt everyday."
Harry finally spoke. "I never got over you Hermione; I never said that I had."
"But…"
"Don't interrupt me; you need to know that I still hurt to. I have been with these girls since you left because I am hoping that someone will feel special to me. But I still think of our two days in Hogsmeade, I still wish I could go back to that." There was a loud bang on the wall. Zoya was getting restless. "I'll be back," he muttered and quickly left the room, he was back in just a few seconds, and he sat down on the bed again. Hermione looked at him; she was still crying and her eyes were getting red now. "Please don't cry," Harry pleaded and wiped away the tears with the back of his hand.
"I just don't understand, if you aren't over me, why aren't you with me?" she whimpered.
Harry thought for a second and answered, "There is just so much pain between us. I spent eighteen months of my life being very, very angry at you. And just because I still have feelings for you, doesn't mean the anger isn't still there."
"I'm just so terribly sorry," she whispered so quietly that Harry almost didn't hear her.
"You did what you had to do. You wanted to spare everyone's feelings. Maybe you did the right thing, I don't know. I just know that I was incredibly hurt when you left." Hermione was quiet. No words felt right. "Zoya left," Harry said, "and I am willing to talk all night if that's what it takes."
"I don't know if talking will solve anything, I feel broken inside. I can't fix this; I just want to fix it. I want you to me like you used to, the good in me."
"Believe me, I still see the good in you. You are the greatest person I have ever met."
Hermione turned to face him. She slowly leaned closer; their faces were just inches apart.
Harry leaned the rest and softly their lips touched. They hadn't kissed for two years, but the fire it use to cause flamed brightly again. Hermione cried softly into Harry's mouth, but he continued to kiss her, and with one hand he pulled her up on top of him so she was now straddling him. They kissed hungrily, Harry's hands pushed their way under Hermione's shirt and up her back. He had wanted to touch her skin for so long and it felt so wonderful. Hermione held his face with both her hands, and she kissed him as if it was the last kiss she'd have in her life. Harry lifted her up and placed her underneath him laying heavily on her. He grabbed one of her legs and wrapped it around his waist. He wanted her, right then and right there.
"I love you, Harry," she looked into the green eyes that haunted her dreams.
"I love you, too, Hermione," he lowered his head and slowly kissed her collar bone.
Reality interrupted them when Ron knocked on the door. "Hermione, are you sleeping?" he asked. Hermione looked terrified at Harry, what were they going to do?
"Um… no, but I'm not dressed," she answered desperately.
"Oh, even better," he joked and Harry frowned at Hermione.
"Is there anything special you wanted to talk about?" Hermione asked.
"No, not really, I just wanted some company downstairs. Harry is busy with that Zoya girl, so…."
"Sure," she answered and Harry looked inquiringly at her. They heard Ron descend down the stairs.
"Why?"
"I just, I don't know. I don't want to do this now, not like this. Not with Ron downstairs." Harry looked disappointed and Hermione gave him one more kiss.
"Where will we go from here?" Harry wondered.
"I'm not sure."
She got up out of the bed and walked downstairs. She drank tea with Ron for almost an hour before he finally was tired. This was good though, it had given both Harry and her time to think. When she was sure Ron was asleep in his room Hermione quietly snuck out of her room and carefully opened the door to Harry's room. She tip-toed up to his bed.
"Are you awake?" she whispered. He didn't answer, he just lifted the duvet and she slipped into the bed. She didn't want to know what Harry had decided just yet, she just wanted to enjoy the moment, enjoy being in his bed.
-
When Hermione woke up Harry was still sleeping. He had held her all night, almost too tight, but Hermione wasn't complaining. She turned around and looked lovingly at him. He was lying on his back with the duvet under his belly button, just like the last time she had been in bed with Harry. His eyes started flickering and he smiled when he saw Hermione.
"Morning," he kissed her nose.
"I'm happy," she simply replied. "I'm happy!" she shrieked.
"Shh… Ron will hear you."
"Nope, he left twenty minutes ago," she said and grinned.
"Well, then." He smiled and began tickling her.
As Harry took a shower Hermione made a very big breakfast. She was so happy; she just wanted to dance around the kitchen. When Harry came down his hair was wet, and it was dripping on his t-shirt. She smiled lovingly at him and placed two pancakes in front of him.
"Are you going to spoil me like this everyday now?"
"If you let me," she smiled.
As Harry started eating his pancakes Hermione just watched him. "Stop staring at me, it creeps me out," he mumbled with his mouth full.
"Will I scare you away if I tell you that I am really happy right now?"
He shook his head. "Look Hermione, we probably should keep this to ourselves for a while, don't you think? I mean, ease Ron into it a bit. Don't you think so?" She nodded. She was disappointed, she wanted to scream that she was seeing Harry again, but she also knew that he was right.
"So what are we now? A couple? Friends? Or friends with benefits?"
"I don't know, I'm not making the rules. But I'd say that we are between dating and couple." Harry saw Hermione frowning slightly and knew she was overanalyzing it all. "Come here," he ordered as he pulled out his chair, "sit". He gestured to his lap; she smiled and did as she was told. She sat down on one of his legs, with her own legs placed in-between his legs. She smiled sweetly at him.
"I know you are worrying about small things right now, but you should just focus on the good things. We are together now, aren't we?"
"Well, I have a few questions…" He nodded inquiringly. "About all those… girls…" Harry frowned when he heard what the question would be. She jokingly hit him on the shoulder. "I have to ask,"
"No Hermione, you don't. We are starting fresh now; no girl ever mattered to me except you. You should probably know that the number of girls have been greatly exaggerated by the magazines as well." She doubted the last statement.
"But we are now seeing each other exclusively right?" she inquired.
"Of course. I wouldn't want any other girl. I finally got you back." He smiled and kissed her neck.
"You could have gotten me a lot earlier if you had just asked," she mumbled.
He stopped kissing her and looked at her. "Well, I guess I wasn't ready. I was very mad, and hurt. But the fact is that I never stopped loving you, so how could I not want to be with you? But we should leave the past behind us, and concentrate on here and now, and on the future." She didn't answer, but she gave him a long and deep kiss. They agreed to keep their relationship a secret for a while, until the time was right.
-
Harry had a hard time getting any work done; all he did was dream about kissing Hermione. He could watch the huge clock on his wall for hours, just waiting for time to pass and longing to go home. When he went to lunch he saw Hermione sitting on the other side of the canteen with co-workers from her department. He looked at her and his eyes were sparkling, he felt happy again. He had been so madly in love with her two years ago, in those few days they had spent together he had allowed himself to dream about what could be, but those dreams had been smashed so fast. But he had never stopped hoping, loving, and dreaming. Every new girl he met, he would compare to her. But no one could ever compare, no one smelled as nice, no ones skin felt like fire under his fingers. No one could make him laugh like she could and no one could drive him crazy, in both good and bad ways, like her. And now he had her again, she had slept in his arms that night. Things were going to be all right, he just knew it. Ron might think it was strange in the beginning but he would come around!
As Hermione got up from her table to leave, she suddenly saw Harry. She beamed at him.
He felt like waving her over, but he had to remind himself of their talk that morning. They shouldn't flaunt their love in front of everyone!
-
Harry was sent on a secret mission later that day, and he'd have to be away for the rest of the week. He didn't have time tell Hermione that he was leaving, and he knew she'd be disappointed.
When Hermione got home from work, Hedwig was waiting on her bed. She reached out for the parchment tied around the bird's leg.
Hermione,
Bad news!
I have been sent away for work and won't be back until Friday! This couldn't have happened at a worse time. I will make it up to you this weekend, I promise.
Love,
Harry
She pressed the parchment against her chest. She was disappointed that he would be gone for five days, but it was all right. He had written her a note, because she was important enough to be notified, just like a caring boyfriend would notify a girlfriend. Was she his girlfriend? She sure hoped so.
The week felt like it would never end. She missed Harry terribly, it felt like she had tasted a small spoon of a delicious cake, and she wanted to eat the whole thing now. She had avoided Isaac a couple of times during the week, but she didn't have to work hard. He was on the same floor as Harry. And if Harry was busy, so was Isaac.
-
When Friday finally came she was in a hurry to get home, she didn't know when Harry would be home and was hoping he
was already there. As she opened the door she was surprised to hear a lot of different voices. She went straight into
the kitchen with her coat still on.
"Ron?"
"Hi, pretty lady," he answered, "we're having a party. I invited the gang."
Hermione looked around and sure enough there they all were.
"Don't you think Harry will be too tired for a party?" she asked slightly annoyed that her night with Harry might be spoiled.
She felt a warm hand softly touch her waist. She smiled and turned around, but it was not Harry. "Isaac?" she exclaimed. She turned back to face Ron and he winked at her, nodding as if to say "you're welcome".
-
You won't forget to leave a review, right? Thanks!
-->