Chapter Thirteen: The Forgettable Drink
Lily sat in the library as she tried to read away the pain that was burning in her heart. Fat tear drops dripped onto the ancient pages of the book, leaving warped marks on the pages. She wiped her eyes, knowing that she had done the right thing. She couldn't be the one who broke up the Marauders, just because she was in love with one of them.
"Hello, Lily," a voice droned as Severus Snape sat down across the table from her. "Are you ok?"
"I'm fine," Lily lied. She looked up at him and forced a smile. "Are you certain you should be talking to me? Won't Lucius be mad?"
"Probably, but you were my friend before Lucius," Severus said quietly. He reached across the table and took her hand in his. "Do you want to talk about it?"
"Not really," Lily said as she forced another smile. "Really, I just want to forget about it all."
"Perhaps, then, I should brew you an amnesia potion?" Severus offered half serious. Lily laughed. "I have some down in the dungeon for occasions like this."
"That would be excellent," Lily murmured as she stood up from the table. Severus stood also.
"You know, I could," Severus said in a lowered voice. He took her hand in his and guided her out of the section of the library where she was hiding out. She bit her lip and nodded.
"You know what, Sev that would be great if you could do that for me. I don't think I can handle having to live with the memories that are plaguing my heart right now," Lily breathed as they headed toward the dungeon and Slughorn's classroom.
"Are you sure you don't want to talk about it, Lily?" Severus asked as they passed Peter in the hallway. Lily felt her heart shatter at the sight of just Peter.
"No, I don't want to talk about it, and I don't want to remember," Lily said sternly, afraid if she even let down the fortress around her heart she would drown in her own tears and self pity.
"Ok, well, the potion will be a quick and painless way to forget, but it is nearly permanent. Once you drink it, there will be no going back," Severus said as he and Lily turned a corner.
Peter was torn between telling James and the other Marauders and keeping it to himself. On the one hand, Lily had nearly destroyed his little group of friends, and he didn't want that. On the other hand, Peter knew that he would be in more trouble if the Marauders found out that Peter could have stopped Lily from erasing the memories of James. Peter ran off to find James.
"James," Peter breathed hard as he grabbed his side. He had run from the castle to the Quidditch pitch where James was moping with Sirius and Remus.
"What?" James practically moaned, as if even speaking hurt him.
"Lily, in the castle… the library… with Severus… amnesia potion…" Peter gasped as he tried to catch his breath. James and the other Marauders headed back to the castle as quickly as their legs would take them, Peter trailing behind, exhausted. They had no idea where they could be, checking the library. Sirius pulled out the map and summoned her location.
"She's in Slughorn's class with Snape!" Sirius shouted as they took the hallway down to the dungeon. They raced along the corridor and burst into the class room.
Severus was standing with his back to the door, looking at Lily who was holding an opaque goblet that was smoking a sick-looking blue colored smoke. The rim was against her mouth and it was tilted all the way back as she drained the last of the potion from the cup. James, Sirius, and Remus stood just inside the classroom with a look of horror on their faces.
"What did you do?" James growled as Lily wavered and the cup fell from her hand, clattering loudly on the floor. She wasn't looking at any of them.
"She… she asked me for a potion to forget," Severus said with a hint of fear in his voice. "She told me to give it to her; practically begged me."
"Lily?" James asked as he stepped forward. Lily's knees buckled and she landed hard on them, doubled over as if in pain. James looked to Severus. "What is happening to her?"
"The potion is working," Severus said quietly as he watched her intently. Peter skid to a stop when he entered the classroom. He looked at Lily on her knees on the floor, and Severus standing a bit away from her and the Marauders. Lily was shaking slightly, trembling as if she was cold. She tilted her head back, eyes closed as if she was in pain. Severus stepped forward, another cup in his hand.
"What are you giving her?" James demanded.
"Just water," Severus said quietly, holding the cup out to James for inspection.
"Did… did she tell you what she was trying to forget?" James asked coldly. Severus' mouth curled into a malicious smile.
"She didn't have to," Severus said as he tapped his own head with his finger. He pressed the rim of the cup to Lily's mouth and tilted it back, forcing water into her mouth. Lily drank slowly from the cup. Severus glanced over his shoulder at the Marauders. "It's too late, Potter, she doesn't remember you."
"Lily," James pleaded as he fell to his knees in front of her. Her eyes fell on him, but there was no light of recognition. He touched her hand, but it seemed like she wasn't even there. She slowly pulled away and climbed to her feet. "How could you do this, Snape? Even for you, this was underhanded."
"Underhanded?" Severus snarled at him as he slipped his arm under hers to support her. "I just did what Lily asked of me. She begged me for a way to forget, and I gave it to her."
"She won't love you," Sirius growled.
"Well, now," Severus said smiling maliciously at him. "Now, she doesn't remember she ever loved any of you."
James remained on the floor for a while after Severus had left supporting Lily, who was weakened from the potion. He was worse off than when Lily had broken up with him. At least back then, she was suffering too. Now, he suffered alone and in silence. Lily didn't even remember him.
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