Disclaimer: I own nothing! But then again…I've got plausible Deniability
Summary: The students of Hogwarts to go see a psychiatrist! *Laughter* This will be fun!
A/N: I just got this idea to make a fic where everyone was pissed about something, and needed to vent about it! This isn't my Christmas fic! I'm going to do one of those very soon! Though Christmas is in three days…Give me time…I will get it done! This is my…New year's Fic…how about that? Yeah! It shouldn't be extremely long…More chapters to come though! Don't worry!
I'm not crazy!
(October 23)
Dr. Lipshitz stood outside his office door, waiting for anyone to come. He looked down at his watch, "Hmm…Figures…kids never think they need help." He looked up to see a young man walking his way. "Hello there, are you here for a session?"
He nodded, "Not a bloody word of this gets out to anybody okay!?"
"I'm a psychiatrist, everything that goes on behind these doors are strictly confidential Mr...?"
"Malfoy."
"Mr. Malfoy, please, come in." He opened the door and Draco walked in. "Have a seat and we can get started. Just let me grab my clip board."
Draco looked down at the burgundy lounge chair he was supposed to sit in, "Would you mind if I did a color changing spell? This will clash with my hair."
"If that's what makes you comfortable." Dr. Lipshitz said as he took out a quill and wrote down, 'Cares about how he looks…no matter where he is.'
"What am I supposed to say?" Draco asked getting comfortable in the chair.
"Tell me how you day went, or you can explain any problems that you are experiencing. Anything you would like…vent."
"My day was bloody terrible! We lost a game again! I try to whip the team into shape but they never do anything I tell them to. It's like having replica's of Crabbe and Goyle out on the field!"
"Crabbe and Goyle?"
"My cronies."
'Has two cronies, might be lacking friends.' Dr. Lipshitz wrote down. "Anything else?"
"This morning I woke up and looked in the mirror! I had a zit the size of a Volkswagen!" Draco touched the spot where it once was, "It's gone now, Snape gave me a potion for it. You know what's even worse though!? Pansy Parkinson attacked me this morning on my way out of the common room! She jumped on me and tried to kiss me. I had just taken a shower and didn't want to be drooled on. She began complaining about how I never spent time with her anymore! While doing this she drenched me in spit and tears! WHICH IS NOT A GOOD COMBINATIONS IF YOU ASK ME!"
'Has problem with women.'
Draco sighed, "I'm venting now, just in case you didn't know."
"That's perfectly alright. Tell me, Mr. Malfoy, how are things at home?"
"Everything at home is begging to be a pain in my arse! Don't take that saying the wrong way! I'm not gay! Anyways…SO WHAT IF I DON'T WANT TO BE A BLOODY DEATH EATER!? I don't enjoy killing innocent people! Even if I don't like Mudbloods! I have the most annoying father in the world. He thinks Voldermort likes him! I swear he got hit in the head with a red brick and knows nothing!"
"Why a red brick?"
"WHO CARES ABOUT THE FUCKING COLOR!?" Draco yelled
"M'hmm. Interesting."
"How long is this session supposed to last?"
"For an hour."
"How long has it been?"
"About fifteen minutes."
Draco sighed, "There's this girl…I can't get her to notice me! No matter what I do! Push her down and call her names! I even did a spell to make her bag break! And you know what she did!? I'LL TELL YOU WHAT SHE DID! SHE PICKED EVERYTHING UP AND WALKED AWAY! Didn't even yell at me! Normally I have no problems with the ladies!"
'More problems with women…in denial.'
"What the hell is wrong with me!? I'm sure I didn't smell bad! I'm a Malfoy its instinct to smell good!"
'Cocky.'
"Maybe I'll use a spell to die her hair black! Ha who would have thought? A Weasley and black hair! This is besides the point…what are you writing on that clippie thing!?"
"Just taking notes Mr. Malfoy."
"Taking notes!? Am I some sort of test subject!?"
"No…not at all." Dr. Lipshitz looked down at his clipboard and back up to Draco…though Draco was no longer in the seat but at the door.
"I'm leaving now…THAT BLOODY WENCH HATES ME!" Draco added as he slammed the door.
'Always has to have the last word.'
~*~
That's the first chapter! This fic is going to be pure comic relief! I've already Got Ginny, Harry, Ron, Hermione, Luna and More Angry Draco! If you liked this one, Review and let me know! If you've got any ideas as to what else people can be angry over…let me know! Don't worry, I'm trying to make the chapters longer, but people and their tempers…tsk tsk. In Bold is what the Psychiatrist is writing down on the paper…in case you didn't figure that one out!!!
Let's play truth or dare, shall we? I dare you to press that button in the left hand corner…says, "Submit Review…Go." Can't find it? *Sigh*
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