Harry and Lupin flooed to Grimmauld Place a short time later. Harry took his trunk and put it in the same room he and Ron had shared last summer. He looked around and noticed that the house seemed brighter than it did the last time he was there. The windows and walls looked like they had been scrubbed recently. It was an improvement, but there was still an aura of darkness that surrounded the house. As he walked down to the kitchen, Harry's mind was flooded with images of Sirius in the house. He tried to block them out, but they were incessant in their progress. He walked through the kitchen door and when he looked at the kitchen table he swore he saw Sirius sitting there. He closed his eyes and willed the image away. When he opened them again, he saw Lupin sitting in the place he thought he had seen Sirius. Lupin sat slumped over in the chair with his elbows on the tabletop. His hands were on both sides of his head holding it like someone in pain. Harry walked over and sat in the chair next to him.
"Remus?" Harry asked quietly so as not to startle him "Are you alright?"
Remus looked up at Harry and the expression on his face almost broke Harry's heart. He could see the tears trying to escape from Remus's eyes, and his face had gone pale. He had a look of suffering on his face, one that Harry was sure he had worn quite a bit over the summer.
"I look around this house and all I see is him Harry" Lupin said almost in a whisper "I miss him so much that I feel like I'm in physical pain." As he said this two tears slid down his cheeks and fell to the top of the table. "So many people that I was close to are gone. I never thought I could feel as lost as I did when your parents died. But losing Sirius is so much worse. We were the last of the Marauders. He had such a thirst for life, but fate just wouldn't let him quench that thirst. He spent so many years locked away in Azkaban, and when he finally breaks free from that prison he ends up a prisoner in his own home."
Harry sat there listening while trying to keep his own tears in check. He looked at Remus and realized that he was not the only one that life treated unfairly. From becoming a werewolf, to losing close friends and battling to save their world from the same dark lord that wanted to kill Harry, their lives were similar.
"I know what you mean. I walked down the stairs and all I could think about was how Sirius spent his last days in this dreary house. He didn't deserve to have to go through everything he did." As he said this, Harry realized that something had been missing "Remus, what happened to the portrait of Mrs. Black? She didn't scream at us when we came in today."
A look of something close to hatred flashed across his face before he said "I came back here shortly after we lost Sirius and she started bellowing about her good for nothing son, and I lost it. I'm not proud of what I did, but it needed to be done. Kreacher is gone also. He went to live with the Malfoy family."
'Good riddance' thought Harry as he looked around the kitchen 'makes being here a little easier.'
After their talk in the kitchen, Harry decided to go up to his room to rest. After everything that had happened, his
body felt drained. After a couple hours he heard a knock on his door and Remus stuck his head into the room.
"Harry, Dumbledore needs me at the school for a few hours. Do you think you can handle being here alone for a
little while?"
"Sure" said Harry "did anything happen?"
"No, I think there's a meeting to discuss your latest power development. There will be two guards from the Order outside the house and one will be stationed in the sitting room if you should need anything." he said as he pulled the door closed and left.
'What am I supposed to do now?' thought Harry. 'I don't remember the last time I was so bored.' Harry heard another knock on his door and said "come on in Remus. Did you forget to tell me something?"
"Not quite" said a voice that caused Harry to jump off the bed. He looked towards the door where he saw Hermione standing there looking back at him with a look of extreme anger.
"H-Hermione? What are you doing here? Aren't you supposed to still be in hospital?"
"No" she spat out "if you would have stuck around the ward instead of running off like a coward, you would have known that the potion Pomfrey used worked. I'm fully recovered and since there are no after affects she said I could return to the Burrow." The expression on her face softened as she said "when I found out from Dumbledore that you were here with Lupin, I asked if I could stay here with you instead."
"Why not go back to the Burrow?" Harry asked confused.
"With everything going on between the three of us, I would rather be here with you than have to put up with Ron's insufferable attitude right now. I heard that the two of you had a little disagreement?"
"I wouldn't say little" he said and then decided to change the subject "Hermione, do you remember what happened in the shop today?"
"Yes, I remember what happened. I was running towards you to see what was happening to you and you threw your hands out towards me to stop me. Next thing I know, I'm being hit with a ball of fire and everything just went black." she said quietly while walking over to sit next to Harry on the bed. "Harry, what happened to me wasn't your fault. Please don't blame yourself."
Harry looked at her as she said this and saw almost a pleading look in her eyes. "I just don't understand what happened to me. Something must have triggered it, and it has to be something that never happened before or else this power or whatever it is would have showed itself sooner."
They sat next to each other in a tense silence for a while. Hermione was the first one to break that silence. "You know Harry, I have no idea what has happened to the three of us over the summer. This has to be the worst summer I've had. I just wanted to spend time with my best friends and have some fun, maybe even relax a little after the year we've had. I especially wanted to spend time with you, but what you said to Ron that day in the yard hurt really badly. I told you how I felt Harry, and after that kiss I thought you might feel the same. But after what you said, I highly doubt it. I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable."
Harry could hear her voice breaking with her last word. 'She's crying because of me again' he thought. 'I have to do something or I'll lose her for good.'
Harry turned and looked at Hermione "Please look at me" he said. She turned her face towards his, and his heart broke the moment he saw her tears. "Hermione, I tried to explain to you that day and even after that the words that came out of my mouth were all wrong. That kiss between you and I was not a mistake! I have feelings for you; I'm just scared of that damn prophecy! Everyone I care for gets hurt, or worse killed. I think I would die if that happened to you 'Mione."
At the use of her nickname, a small smile graced her lips. She reached her hand out and gently placed it on his cheek. He looked in her eyes and saw a look of pure adoration. To his surprise, she moved her hand from his cheek to the back of his neck and pulled him to her for a kiss. But this kiss was different from the one's they shared at the Burrow. This one was sweet, but it held a longing, it held all their pent up emotions. Hermione wrapped her other arm around his neck while he moved and put his arms around her waist. The kiss quickly grew more passionate. Hermione's left leg, seemingly of its own volition, swung over Harry's legs so that she sat there straddling him. Harry pulled away momentarily to look at her with a questioning look, but she just claimed his lips again. After that Harry lost all conscience thought. He kissed her greedily, his hands roaming over her body; her back, her butt, her arms, wherever he could reach. Then he lifted up the back of her jumper and pressed his hands against her warm, silky skin. Still kissing her with abandon, he moved them around to her stomach, up to her bra covered breasts. He felt her gasp into his mouth, but she didn't stop him. He cupped her breasts, using his thumbs to graze over her nipples making them hard instantly. As he did this, she had also slipped her hands under his jumper. His skin felt like it was on fire, it was so hot! She let her hands roam over his back where she could feel his back muscles flex as he moved. As his thumbs grazed her nipples again, she moaned into Harry's mouth and pulled back from him.
While he sat dazedly looking at her, she reached down and pulled the bottom of her shirt over her head. After she discarded her shirt on the floor, she reached for his and promptly removed it also. He claimed her lips again while reaching behind her to undo her bra clasp. As he pulled the straps over her shoulders and down her arms, he watched its descent and took in every inch of skin that was revealed. As he removed it completely, he looked at her perfect breasts. They were big enough to fit in his hands, with rosy nipples that were just begging for his attention. He bent his head down and took one into his mouth and heard Hermione moan his name. She ran her hands through his hair and held him in place. He moved to the other one and lavished it just the same and moved back to her mouth. She kissed him hard and pushed herself flush against him. The feeling of their skin touching sent them both into oblivion. Before either of them knew it, they were lying on the bed completely naked. Harry rose up on his elbows above Hermione, and with a questioning look asked "are you sure you want to do this?"
Hermione leaned up and gave him a quick kiss. "I would have stopped you a long time ago if I didn't want this Harry. I told you, I'm tired of holding back. I'm yours Harry, and I want to do this."
Harry leaned down and kissed her, putting all his feelings for her in that one kiss. As he did, he parted her legs and positioned himself at her entrance. As he went to pull back from their kiss, Hermione held him there with on hand and guided him in with the other. He went slowly and stopped when he reached her barrier. She kissed him harder and wrapped her legs around him, pushing him in the rest of the way. She froze and blinked her eyes quickly trying to stay the tears. Harry lay there as still as he could so as not to hurt her anymore. When she looked him in the eye and gave a little nod, he started a slow, clumsy rhythm. They started moving in time with each other until finally Harry couldn't hold back any longer. He cried her name and gave one last thrust into her. He collapsed onto her and lay there breathing heavily. She laid there with her arms wrapped around him, drawing lazy circles on his back.
"Are you ok?" he asked as he rolled off of her and pulled her against him.
"I'm fine" she said breathily as Harry planted kisses on the back of her neck. They lay there a while until she felt Harry pull back a little.
"Hermione" he asked hesitantly "did you, um..."
"Finish?" she asked, amused at the embarrassment she heard in his voice. "No, I didn't but that's not unusual the first time according to some of the books I've read."
He smiled as he realized she had been reading books on sex. "Maybe next time, huh?" he asked with a big grin on his face.
"We'll see Potter" she said smiling also as they both drifted off to sleep.