Yes-IÕm back. I promised I would finish this story! But IÕll save my explanations for the bottom of this chapter. But for now, please enjoy the second part of Chapter Fifteen.
OK-I donÕt get why this is happening. When I upload my story, I get the weird symbols in place of apostrophes and such. Can someone help me with this? I have Microsoft Word 2008 for Mac. I can only upload as htm, not html, and thus the symbols. I hope you guys donÕt mind them right now - IÕm doing to report it to the admins, and that could take a bit for a response. And you guys have waited long enough.
Liz21
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Chapter Fifteen, part 2
This time, when Ginny awoke, she was happy to see Draco staring at her. Their bodies were still wrapped closely together, their heads resting on the same pillow. Ginny could feel the warmth of the sunlight from the windows, though she had no idea what time it was, or how long she slept for. Her body felt sore, but in a good way, and her mind É well, she decided to put it on pause for the time being. But just to be on the safe side, she leaned forward and kissed Draco on the lips.
When she pulled away, she saw DracoÕs face fill with a smirk. ÒWhatÕs that for?Ó she asked.
DracoÕs smirk grew. ÒBelieve it or not, this is exactly how you acted at Hogwarts.Ó
Ginny felt a surge of fear and doubt run through her but stopped herself from pulling away. Would she ever get use to the idea that her only sense of her past was through Draco, whom she still didnÕt know was a credible source? ÒHow did I act?Ó
Draco dragged his fingers down her bare shoulder, sending chills up her spine. ÒHot one minute, cold the next,Ó he said. His eyes left hers to follow the trail he made down her arm. ÒThough you were always like that. ItÕs what made me notice you in the first place.Ó
Ginny tried to focus on his words, but his gentle touch distracted her. There was no doubt she had a temper - she grew one the second she was old enough to realize it was the only way she could have control with so many older brothers. ÒYou know, most normal people were afraid of it, not enticed.Ó
Draco let out a low chuckle. ÒAnd most people want what they canÕt have,Ó he said. Once his fingertips reached her hips, they turned around and trailed back to her shoulder.
Ginny let out a sigh at his relaxing touch. ÒTell me what it was like when we first ÉÓ Her cheeks reddened. She didnÕt want to say when they first had sex, because she didnÕt know if it was sex first, and then a relationship. But based off what just happened in the shower, she was thinking it was the sex.
Draco must have noticed her hesitation; his eyes were back on her face, and she could feel her cheeks redden. ÒOr how about when you first realized I wanted you?Ó he said. ÒThatÕs where it really gets interesting.Ó
Ginny quickly nodded, worried that the talk of sex would lead away from the verbal communication that she needed right then. She already proved to herself of their sexual connection - many times over.
ÒLetÕs see,Ó Draco said as he continued with his moving hand. ÒYou know it started with you falling off your broom. Well, for you at least. When I caught you, and you were forced to look at me - and I mean really look at me as someone who saved you, not just a horrible Malfoy - I could swear something clicked in your mind. Because it was after that when your looks were filled with something other than hate.Ó
ÒDid I even acknowledge that you saved me?Ó Ginny asked, trying to wrap her mind around the thought.
Draco laughed again. ÒI think you were too shocked to form words. But you didnÕt hit me, at least not right away. And that was enough for me É at the time.Ó Draco paused for a moment; his face grew serious. ÒI broke a promise to myself, that I would never get involved. And the second I chose to save you from falling, I knew things would never be easy again. That IÕd be falling too, forever.Ó
At his words, his hand stopped as well as GinnyÕs breathing, but just as soon as she sunk into the seriousness of the situation, Draco smiled and his hand moved again. ÒBut thatÕs when things really picked up. It wasnÕt just about thinking about you, or trying to get a look at you. After I had you in my arms, even for that terrifying moment, it became this restless, obsessive need to have you again. But you werenÕt as cooperative with your feet on the ground.
ÒIt started off innocent enough. IÕd catch your eyes in the Great Hall, instead of just looking away. And IÕd hold them until you grew impossibly red, because you knew something was stirring between us, whether you liked it or not. Or IÕd always make sure to be around you, whether it was on the way to classes, or outside studying by the lake. I knew that the more I made sure to be around, the more youÕd realize I wouldnÕt just go away, that you couldnÕt just forget about what happened between us. And that must have worked, because you finally reacted.Ó
ÒWhatÕd I do?Ó Ginny asked. ÒDid I hit you?Ó
ÒSeveral times,Ó Draco said with a smile. ÒWhen you realized that you couldnÕt ignore me anymore, you started to fight back. IÕll never forget when you confronted me. Despite all my sneakiness and planning, I didnÕt see it coming.
ÒYou were supposed to be on the way to Potions. I always saw you then because I had a free period, and on my way to the Slytherin common room I made sure to walk by SnapeÕs class. But this time when I waited for you to walk by, you werenÕt there.
ÒI panicked. I thought something bad happened to you -you were never late to class. So instead of waiting around, I decided to find you myself. Only you found me. I was almost out of the dungeons when all the sudden you were there, surprising the hell out of me. It took a minute to realize that you completely caught on, that it was no longer cat chasing the mouse. Now the mouse wanted answers.
ÒYou told me you knew I was following you, and you were sick of my stares at dinner. That you were thankful I saved your life, but to just go away already. And the hatred in your voice - I almost believed it, except when you said I was lucky you didnÕt tell your brothers, your voice cracked. You werenÕt mad at me. You were mad at yourself for wanting me to stare at you and to follow you. You were mad that you were betraying your family and Harry, because just the fact that you would approach me meant it bothered you enough to care.
ÒSo I took advantage of that weak moment and kissed you. And you decked me.Ó
GinnyÕs mouth dropped open. She was so drawn into the story that she didnÕt know to be shocked, or laugh, or cheer herself on for being so aggressive. Because it still felt like this was some other person Draco was talking about, and Ginny was a mere spectator.
ÒWhat happened then?Ó Ginny asked.
ÒI grabbed your hand when you tried to hit me twice,Ó Draco said. ÒAnd then I kissed you again. Only this time you kissed back.Ó
Ginny felt warmth rush through her, and was very aware that DracoÕs hand was back on her shoulder. ÒWhat was it like?Ó she asked, her voice soft.
DracoÕs eyes glanced at her lips. ÒA lot like when we first kissed here,Ó he said. ÒAngry. Rough. Passionate. Like you were trying to rid yourself of any feelings for me physically. As if you could just get it out of your system, IÕd somehow disappear.Ó
She remembered their first kiss in the manor all too well. It was everything that Draco described, with the added confusion and sense of betrayal - two feelings she still couldnÕt shake. ÒBut what happened then? One kiss couldnÕt have prompted me to lie and sneak around, and risk everything.Ó That she at least knew was true. Despite what memories were missing, or what happened between them, she still had her morals and her pride. Something big had to shaken them up enough. Otherwise it was one hell of a kiss.
Draco adjusted himself so his elbow was resting on the pillow, his head in his hand. ÒNo, I found you were much too stubborn for that. ItÕs not to say I expected that some good snogging would get you to forget who you were, and who I was. And I knew it would never be easy, otherwise I would have tried something sooner. I didnÕt expect you to go on pretending that nothing happened, and to somehow hate me even more. But you did.
ÒIt was like starting all over again, expect I was two steps back. Before I could watch from afar, and you didnÕt have a clue. It was a secret, and there was no risk. And before I made sure to never get close, but I - we - crossed a line. And it took you awhile to realize that once crossed, you could never go back.
ÒA month passed after we kissed. You didnÕt so much look at me during the time, or even acknowledge that I existed. Whenever Potter or your brother would pick a fight with me and you were nearby, youÕd either somehow disappear or look everywhere but me. I didnÕt know if it was so much hate as it was fear.Ó
It had to be both, Ginny thought. She could only imagine that the hate she felt was mostly towards herself, and she tried to blame on Draco. She was probably beating herself up for weeks, trying to forget that not only did Draco Malfoy kiss her, but she kissed back. With that one kiss, she had lost a bit of herself. Or whom she thought she was.
ÒSo what happened then?Ó she asked. Her voice was above a whisper. It was no longer joking and teasing. She had to know what really drove her to him, beyond a kiss and beyond everything she stood up for.
Draco didnÕt say anything for a moment, nor did he look at her. He didnÕt seem to be looking at anything, and just stared off into space.
ÒIt was my fatherÕs death,Ó he said finally.
GinnyÕs face scrunched in confusion. She draped the blankets around her chest and sat up, staring at him. ÒWhat are you talking about? I donÕt remember -Ó
ÒYou couldnÕt remember his death, at least not clearly,Ó Draco said, looking up at her. ÒOf course you know heÕs dead, but probably never thought twice about the exact details, or why they would be fuzzy to you. It was too closely tied with us - it had to go with the rest of the memories.Ó
That, she thought, made sense. Why would she be bothered with petty details of how an enemy died? To a certain point in the war, as much as she hated death and was sick of it, there was always a sense of relief when a Death Eater went down. The less there were, the better for the Order. She was never told, anyways, how they died - Harry always thought he was protecting her from knowing the truth. What vague thoughts she had of Lucius was knowing that somehow he died, and she was grateful for it.
ÒLike I said, it was a month after we kissed until something happened,Ó Draco began. ÒIt was during dinner when I found out - when everyone did.Ó Draco cleared his throat. ÒHe É Lucius, was on duty. The Dark Lord wanted him to kidnap the minister. Lucius was well known there, so it was easy for him to get in. But when he got there, some of your people were waiting for him.Ó
The way he said Òyour peopleÓ made Ginny draw back. It wasnÕt said with anger or hatred, though she imagined it was somewhere there, hidden deep down. It was an accusation, setting her apart from him, to a place she was always meant to be. There was never supposed to be a Ginny and Draco; there should have never been a world where the two could be together. In those two words, it was even clearer that there were his people, his side, his beliefs, and there were hers, and the two would never meet eye to eye. But somehow, they did.
ÒThat part was kept quiet,Ó he said, looking away from her, Òas with the next year until people realized there was a war going on right in front of them. All that was said in The Evening Prophet was Lucius Malfoy died on an unknown cause while visiting at the Ministry.Ó Draco let out a harsh laugh that made GinnyÕs skin prickle. ÒThey passed it off as if he died of an illness, as if my father was ever that weak.Ó
It wasnÕt DracoÕs dark look on his face that concerned her. ÒYou É you found out from the newspaper?Ó
His eyes snapped to hers, and they were clear again, as if her voice broke him out of a fog. ÒThatÕs exactly what brought you to me - pity,Ó he said.
GinnyÕs face flushed. ÒI didnÕt mean -Ó
ÒIt was pity,Ó Draco interrupted, Òbut itÕs what made you finally see me, without your hatred in the way.Ó Draco rolled over onto his back, with his hands behind his head and his eyes on the ceiling. ÒEvery single person in that hall knew my father was dead the same time I found out, and through all the stares and all the whispers, all I saw were your eyes looking at me for the first time in a month. I knew that Potter and everyone right next to you were happy that it was one less Death Eater to worry about, and all you could do while the hall got louder and the stares grew worse was to just look at me. It was all I wanted you to do all month, and it took the death of my father for you to finally do it.
ÒYour eyes didnÕt leave mine until Snape came and got me. He took me to his office, and told me what really happened, and that my mother wanted me home first thing in the morning for the funeral. But through all this, you know what I was thinking?Ó DracoÕs eyes moved to hers. ÒWhile IÕm hearing about how he died, and his funeral, and everything, all I could think about was you finally looked at me. And I knew it was out of pity, but it kept me from losing control of myself.Ó
She didnÕt know why, but GinnyÕs eyes were filling with tears. She pulled her knees to her chest, making sure she was covered. ÒWhat happened then?Ó was all she could say.
ÒYou found me,Ó he said. ÒI donÕt know how - Snape brought me to a private room so I could be by myself. I didnÕt even know of it, but somehow you managed to find me.Ó
Ginny knew there was only one way to find a hidden room - the MarauderÕs Map. Which meant she went into HarryÕs - her boyfriend -trunk and stole it from him to go seek out the last person she should have wanted. Draco may thought it was pity, and maybe that was some of it, but for Ginny to do that É she knew at that point, the decision was already made on her behalf.
ÒYou didnÕt know what to do once you got there,Ó he said. ÒYou seem startled - not with being a room with me, by ourselves - but that you actually sought me out. I just stood there, staring, trying to convince myself that you were real, and I hadnÕt gone mad. You didnÕt say a word. I donÕt think you trusted yourself to speak. After we stood there forever, doing nothing, you closed the distance between us and kissed me.Ó
Ginny knew it was building up to that. ÒDid we -Ó
ÒYes,Ó Draco said. ÒWhen you kissed me, I just É I couldnÕt let you go. I didnÕt know if you were there just to comfort me, or you finally felt something. I didnÕt know if after that night, things would go back to normal, and if it was my last chance. So I led you to the bed, and you went with me.Ó
GinnyÕs heart started to quicken. She didnÕt imagine it like that at all. She had tried to picture their first time, and based off their first kiss, she thought it would be fiery, and angry, and just rough sex that showed how they should hate each other. But how Draco made it sound, it was anything but that. It was as if they were real lovers, and not two teenagers caught up in doing something rebellious.
ÒWhat was it like?Ó she asked. Her face reddened. ÒI mean, for you and me to finally cross that line, for me to give you my virginity ÉÓ
ÒIt was both our first time,Ó Draco said. ÒYou were shaking. And for the first time since it all started with you, I was scared. I knew after that there was no going back. Ever. Our clothes were on the floor, you were on the tiny, single bed in the room, and I hesitated, trying to tell myself I had to be strong enough to walk away. I had never meant for it to go that far. I never wanted you to actually find out, for you to be involved. I was risking enough as it was, and thatÕs why I did nothing for years, and just watched. The less you knew, the safer you were. But before I could do anything, you spoke for the first time. You said you had made your decision and there was no going back. You were pale but your eyes - there wasnÕt pity in them anymore. There was your stubbornness that I had seen numerous times before, where once you decided on something, that was it. I joined you on the bed and I took you slowly, knowing that in the morning nothing would ever be the same again.Ó Draco stared at her. ÒAnd it wasnÕt.Ó
Ginny stared at him, her face frozen, hanging onto every word. Draco had made the initial first step, but she finished it. It was her doing - her seeking him out - that really started their relationship. Up until that point, things may have died down. Draco may have grown out of his obsession, and she would have pretended the kiss never happened. Beyond all that, to think that it was Lucius MalfoyÕs death that was the leading factor to what brought them together was hard to take in. She understood the pity - she just felt it when she learned how Draco found out of his death. But what was going on through her mind then? What was she thinking to drive her to cross enemy lines - to betray Harry, who was always faithful? To lie to her family, who loved her more than anyone? Ginny bit her lip as the questions swirled in her head. Everything that Draco just told her was helpful, but it was all his side. And he would only know her side of it based on how much she told him in the past. And what was to say that he was even telling the full truth? She could only take his word on things. What if he only told her bits and pieces, or alternated the scenario to make her accept it more? Harry had always thought that if he didnÕt tell her the whole truth - take out the parts that may make her mad or hurt - that he was protecting her out of love. But she always thought it was a lie - that nothing but the whole truth was a lie. And how can DracoÕs stories be completely true if he only had one side to it? How -
ÒAh!Ó Ginny gasped as a sharp pain erupted in her head. Her hands flew to her head, cupping both sides of it, as a white flash erupted behind her closed eyelids. She heard Draco call her name, though it seemed far away. She struggled to find him, to reach out to him, when the white turned to black, and she knew no more.
~*~
The three of them were talking about an upcoming Potions exam. Ginny was only half listening. It bothered her when Harry, Ron, and Hermione would talk about things that she wasnÕt involved in, though she should have been used to it by then. Every now and then Hermione would draw the attention towards her, saying she should be taking notes of what they have to say about the exam, so she had an advantage next year. Ginny only nodded when she heard her name, then the rest of the words would slowly numb out until she was only left with the thoughts in her head. Or a thought - the only though that has been on her mind for the past month.
She didnÕt dare look across the Great Hall at him. Even though it was busy during dinner, she couldnÕt chance it. She knew he would be looking at her. Unlike her determination to pretend he didnÕt exist, Draco was doing quite the opposite. She still felt his eyes on her, and it bothered her so much that she went through great strain to avoid being in the same room with him. Meals were the only time they had to be in the same room, though the hundreds of students around her didnÕt block Draco out as she hoped. It was as if the whole room was dark, every person near her was talking but she couldnÕt hear a sound, and there was a spotlight on Draco. Because as hard as she tried to participate in the conversations around her, as hard as she practiced Quidditch to exhaust herself, or as often as she was around Harry, she couldnÕt stop thinking about Draco. And what they did in the hallway.
Ginny picked up her fork and poked at her potatoes. She checked to see if the three were still talking, and by the looks of it, they acted as if she wasnÕt there. That was the worst of it all. It had been a month since she did the unthinkable. The fact that she - Ginny Weasley - had kissed her familyÕs greatest enemy, that her body warmed to his touch like it never had with Harry. That just that one kiss had fogged her mind of her hatred for Draco over the past years, and even if she was physically ignoring him, her mind could not stop thinking about him. And not in the sense of a crush - not how it was like with Harry when she was younger. This was something different. ItÕs not to say one kiss made her fall for him - far from it. That one kiss opened up a side to her she never knew existed. Her whole life she thought she would marry Harry, that he was the one for her. And when her and Harry first kissed, it felt like an answer to her prayers. She was so caught up in it all, that she never thought of how her feelings for him were based off a childhood crush, and that she was now a woman. Or that sometimes he felt more like a brother, since her family was practically his. Or that she just sat there, waiting for Harry to come back from his latest adventure with Ron and Hermione, or how he did everything with those two, and that she knew he would never put her on the same pedestal as them. But she thought she had no room for complaints, or unhappiness, because all she needed to be happy was Harry.
But when Draco kissed her, she felt every thought, feeling, and justification shattered. Never had Harry kissed her like that, as if he would die if he had to go one more second without touching her. She didnÕt even know there was such a feeling you could show in a kiss. Or a glance. When he kissed her the first time, she hit him out of anger and fear. Him touching her was a road she could never go down, one she didnÕt know to exist, but just a glance at the journey awakened her with a jolt. She had never dreamt of kissing another man except for Harry for the rest of her life, yet here she was with the worst person to do it with. And she was absolutely terrified of how good it felt.
She tried to hit him again, to push him away and out of her thoughts. But he was too quick, and Draco grabbed her hand, pushed her against the wall, and kissed her again. Ginny felt her body grow warm at the thought. It was unlike anything sheÕs ever experienced. She was taken aback by his strength and force, but she wasnÕt frightened. She should have been - a Malfoy had her cornered, he held her hands above her head so she couldnÕt fight, and his mouth was on hers. She couldnÕt have gotten him off if she wanted to. But that was the problem - she didnÕt want him to stop.
So she kissed him back with every ounce of hatred and confusion she felt towards him. When she opened her mouth under his, there was a slight gasp from him, as if he too couldnÕt believe what was going on between them. But it didnÕt slow him down, and she was thankful. He dropped her hands and used his own to cup her face, drawing her closer to him. He was everywhere: his tongue, his lips, his scent. All Ginny could do to hold on was sink her hands into his hair, which she learned by the feeling of something digging into her leg that he liked it.
The biggest thought she couldnÕt get out of her head, which led her to thinking about it over dinner a month later, was that she didnÕt want him to stop. She was snogging the hell out of Draco Malfoy in the hall, and she would have let him take her right against the wall without a second thought. And that was when she was really woken up about Harry. Up to that point in their relationship, they had only made out, with the occasional groping over the clothes. She knew Harry was a shy boy, and she always assumed she was too, because she didnÕt feel the necessity to take things further. But how did that explain what happened with Draco in the hallway? ShouldnÕt she want to be with the one she loved?
ÒWhat is it this time?Ó Harry said, breaking her thoughts so quickly that she jumped. No one noticed though, because they were all looking up at the ceiling.
Owls were delivering what looked to be The Evening Prophet, which made GinnyÕs stomach drop. It was never a good sign that there was news in the beginning of a war that couldnÕt wait for the morning. The hall grew quieter as the more papers were dropped and the more eyes read what was on the front page, and by the time it reached to Harry, all was still except the rustle of paper.
Before she could move, Ron and Hermione were crowding over her to see HarryÕs copy. She rolled her eyes and sat back in her seat, knowing she would have to wait for her turn of the copy, when Ron moved an inch and the headline caught her eye.
ÒLucius Malfoy Found Dead at MinistryÓ
It was as if someone had drowned out what little noise there was in the room, and put a speaker up to her beating heart, growing louder the second as the words sank into her brain. It was the name she had tried to forget about, tried to erase the secrets she had with it. And there it was, in bold black letters, tied to a first name she had hated since her first year.
She blinked at the paper, aware that pain and relief mixed through her. Relief that the man who tried to kill her once was dead; pain, because she knew that as she and the rest of Hogwarts learned of Lucius MalfoyÕs death, so did his son - the person she couldnÕt stop thinking about.
ÒLook here,Ó Harry went on. Ginny only noticed that he was talking the whole time about the article. ÒIt says that Malfoy died of Ôunknown causes.ÕÓ Harry let out a small chuckle that pounded in GinnyÕs ear and made her skin prickle. ÒLooks like the Order finally got him.Ó
ÒGood,Ó Ron said, already settling back into his food. ÒNow if someone could just take care of the other prick, my life would be complete.Ó
All around her, the room was buzzing with noise again. The louder it got, the faster her heart beat, until she couldnÕt take it anymore. She gave away everything at that moment and looked across the hallway at Draco.
His eyes were still glued to the paper. Every head was turned towards him, and he seemed oblivious as his eyes grew bigger, and his face became paler. Pansy, who was sitting next to him, was teary eyed and trying to talk to him, but Draco paid no attention to her. It looked to Ginny as if Draco had forgotten people surrounded him, until his eyes moved from the paper to her.
She was too sad to be scared, and she knew at that moment, he needed her. For whatever he felt towards her - his obsession with her, of following her and always staring at her, of never letting her forget him - she would give into it for that moment if it would help him.
Snape had approached Draco, and while the two walked out of the room, GinnyÕs eyes followed. She felt the tables have turned, that she was now the one watching and planning out her next move.
ÒSo what now?Ó Hermione asked. She too glanced up at Draco while he walked out of the Great Hall.
ÒWe send Remus an owl,Ó Harry said, Òand tell him we want to talk to him at the common room fireplace at midnight. HeÕll tell us what really happened.Ó
HarryÕs voice drew Ginny back to reality. She knew that voice - it was when him, Ron, and Hermione would go off and do something, and she would be left alone. GinnyÕs eyes widened, and her heart picked up again. For the first time, she was happy to be left alone by the three because that meant it would be easier getting to someone else who needed her more than anything at the moment.
It was that easy, Ginny realized as she snuck down the dark corridors underneath HarryÕs invisibility cloak, with his MarauderÕs Map in one hand. But the simplicity of sneaking out of the common room didnÕt ease her nerves. She had done the unthinkable: She not only stole from her boyfriend, and lied to all three about feeling ill and going to bed early, but she was doing it all to see Draco Malfoy. But most disturbing was she was nervous about what she would do when she found Draco, not that she lied to those she should care more about.
His name appeared in a hidden room on the map. It was near the dungeons, but when she approached, what she assumed was the door was a wall. She would have stared at it all day, contemplating if she should go in, knowing what line she was crossing, when she realized she already did so by making that trip. She folded the map, and with a deep breath, she pushed on the wall.
The wall slid to the side, and closed by itself when she entered the room. The room was dark, and by the time her eyes adjusted to it, she realized that Draco was standing a few feet away, staring at her in complete shock.
She noticed right away that he was standing next to a single bed, which tripled her nerves before she could look away. There were no windows; the only light came from a dozen candles around the room, which shined off DracoÕs face, accenting his facial structure and making his eyes glow. After a moment, his eyes lost the shocked look, though she still felt it in every inch of her body.
ÒHow did you ÉÓ was all Draco said before he was silent again.
Ginny felt the map in her robe pocket, but she couldnÕt say a word. Anything she said would be a sure sign of betrayal, and she was still trying to figure out what she was doing there, in a room with him, alone.
Her eyes dropped to the floor; there was a copy of The Evening Prophet near DracoÕs feet, as if he dropped it when he heard the door open. She looked back up, not wanting him to see the pity in her eyes, to see what initially drove her to him. Whatever Draco felt for her - whoever this person was in front of her - confused her. But she knew he still had his Malfoy pride, and he may push her away out of anger. And then what would she do, knowing she crossed that line and was rejected?
His face tightened when she looked back at him, but not out of anger. He was hurting. She was there to comfort him, but she had no idea how, or what he wanted. So she thought back to before with him, and how great kissing him made her feel, and that it had to have the same affect on him É
Before she could talk herself out of it, she rushed towards Draco and kissed him. She meant to kiss him hard like last time, to show that she still hated him, but when she got there, it was anything but that. She touched his lips softly and then drew back to look at him, to see if this was what he wanted. His lips were parted, and his breath already quickened. But his eyes answered her question: there was a spark to them she hadnÕt seen since he kissed her, a spark she was afraid would die at the news of his fatherÕs death.
She was hesitant on her next step when Draco took control, showing her what to do. He swooped down, taking her lips again with a soft kiss. His hands settled on her hips, keeping her close to him as if he was afraid she would run. But she knew at that moment she wasnÕt going anywhere. At this moment, she was with someone who needed her more than a person ever has before. And maybe she needed him back.
The kiss became urgent. His lips deepened against hers, and he slipped his tongue into her mouth. Ginny sighed against his touch and kissed back, feeling a heat from her stomach to her toes. DracoÕs hands moved from her hips and to her shoulders, where he gathered her robe and slipped it off. It hit the ground and pooled at her feet, and DracoÕs followed shortly. GinnyÕs hands were shaking as she undid his tie. She continued to kiss him so he wouldnÕt see how nervous she was, but then realized while he undid her buttoned top, he was shaking as well. Each particle of clothing fell to the floor, until it was just her and Draco kissing, skin touching skin.
Draco didnÕt let go of her until she was on the bed, and then he hesitated. She could see the fear in his eyes, because she felt it, too. They had already gone far enough. They should stop; they shouldnÕt have even started. But that was before Ginny knew she could feel what she was right then.
ÒIÕve already made my decision,Ó she said, her voice breaking the silence. ÒThereÕs no going back.Ó
He stared at her, as if processing what she said, and then stepped forward and joined her on the bed. She lay down on her back, this time unable to hide her shaking. Draco covered her body with his, and just stayed there for a moment and kissed her. He started at her lips, and slowly went down her neck. He was gentle - far more than she could imagine from him. It was as if he was savoring every moment because he took his time. Her heart quickened when he stopped kissing her and looked her into the eyes. She grasped onto his back when she felt him position himself in front of her, and with a quick thrust, he entered her.
Ginny cried out in pain, digging her nails into DracoÕs skin. Draco stopped his movements, and when she could breath again, she nodded and he continued. Slowly, each time he pushed inside her, the pain melted and it was replaced with pleasure. Ginny wrapped her legs around DracoÕs hips, sending him in deeper, making him grunt and her gasp. Then his movements became faster, each thrust making her dizzier and warmer until something in her exploded, sending waves of pleasure from her head to her toes. Draco followed shortly after, groaning in her ear before he collapsed on top of her.
They laid there for awhile, both trying to catch their breaths. Neither said a word. What do you say, Ginny thought, after sleeping with your enemy?
~*~
Thanks for reading! This may have been an awkward place to stop for some. ItÕs no secret that what just happened is a memory - Ginny has been having them often enough throughout the story. But there is more to how precise her memory is - thatÕs to come in the next chapter.
Good news - I finally found Òmy placeÓ to write. IÕm the kind of writer where I canÕt write just anywhere; I need dead quiet (too ADD for noise and music to play!) and a place I feel comfortable in. I finally checked out my local library, and itÕs really nice and perfect. Which means updates will be more frequent again. Yay! So that was the big problem of the slow updates - just getting settled into my new home and my new job. As IÕve said before, IÕm the editor of a magazine, so IÕm pretty busy most of the time!
When I was writing this, I thought to myself ÔMan - do I always have to write about sex?Õ in a sense that I didnÕt want my story to just be about that. But itÕs amazing what you can learn from your characters. I realized that sex was GinnyÕs introduction to her relationship with Draco - that everything for her really started with that kiss, where Draco started for other reasons. And thatÕs why sex, once again, is GinnyÕs way of figuring out her and Draco. She knows what she feels with Draco, but itÕs the emotional/mental connection that confuses her.
IÕm sure most of you are thinking, ÒNo shit, Sherlock.Ó
Anyways, expect the next update within a month. My birthday is coming up soon, so IÕll be free after then.
Thanks again to everyone for being super patient! ItÕs because of you guys that I dug myself out of my non-writing habit, and I couldnÕt be happier!
Liz21