Unofficial Portkey Archive

A/N: I suck at chapter names. Just go with it!

Thanks for all the wonderful reviews! Michie, as the story is already finished and the sequel is in progress, it's a little late for me to add you in, but I'm sure I can find room for you somewhere else! ;)

Chapter 7: Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds

Sirius and Remus were both still out of it. Lily, James and Peter sat in chairs between the two beds. Peter shuffled his feet and shifted in his seat so many times Lily wanted to scream. James was staring at his knees, resting his forehead in one hand. The other was holding onto Lily's hand as though it was his lifeline. The three of them sat silently, occasionally looking at each other but mostly staring at either the two boys or the floor.
Lily could feel the tension in James' hand. She knew he wanted to be out with the twins reeking (sp?) havoc on the people responsible, but she also knew he knew his place was here with his best friends. This thought in her mind, she turned and glared at the far end of the hospital wing. Bellatrix was in one of the far beds with Rodolphus and Calista Serene standing guard.
Lily turned away. It was better to ignore them than think about them. Peter shifted noisily in his chair for the six thousandth time and she cracked.
"Heavens about, Peter, either sit still or go eat already! Apparently it's more important to you than staying here!"
Peter seemed to shrink into his chair and looked at the floor. "Sorry, Lily" he muttered. Lily sighed and leaned back in her chair. She glanced at James and saw the tiniest smile on his face. She smiled too and turned away to look at Sirius.
Sirius' face was very pale, there was a large burn on his arm where the Stinging Hex had struck him, and both boys had large cuts on their head from when they had hit the floor.
Suddenly, James squeezed her hand. "I'm so glad you're here," he whispered. Lily smiled at him and gently kissed his cheek. James smiled once more then went back to staring at his knees.
Lily's stomach was squirming. All afternoon she had thought about telling James that Sirius had kissed her the other night. She really liked Sirius, but she really liked James too. She wasn't sure what she was going to do about this. The only thing she knew was she had to be honest with them both. Yet, as she watched James' concern for Sirius, she recognized their bond. The two were brothers in every way except blood itself. Lily saw this, and she knew she could never tell James.

*********

Hours had passed, and now bright moonlight was pouring through the windows of the hospital wing, illuminating the beds on which Sirius and Remus still lay. Lily and James still sat in their chairs between the two beds; Peter had long since abandoned them to fulfill the needs of his stomach. Bellatrix had been released and she and her fellow Slytherins had long since departed the hospital, throwing contemptuous glares at the Gryffindors on their way out. Lily sworn she had seen that malnourished-looking freak, Calista Serene, give Remus an almost longing glance on her way out, but Lily thought she must have imagined it. Now it was just the four of them.
James was slumped in his chair, hand still linked with Lily's, fast asleep. Lily lay curled up in her chair, gazing at Sirius' sleeping form. She sighed quietly to herself. Even asleep, they're both gorgeous, she thought. She thought of two kisses, one that had spread warmth through her entire body, leaving her with a sense of complete happiness. The other had been like a spark of electricity jolting throughout her, awakening a yearning and a passion she hadn't known existed. She wanted them both and her heart ached with the thought of the choice she knew she soon would have to make.
"Must be heavy thoughts." The quietly spoken words jarred Lily from her confused thoughts. She looked up and a huge smile spread across her face.
"How're you feeling Remus?" she asked, whispering so as not to wake the others.
"Well, as long as I don't play Quidditch for a while, I think I'll be ok." Lily smiled at the little joke. Remus didn't play Quidditch.
"Loser," she grinned.
"Yeah, I should leave the joke making to the professionals," Remus grinned. He sat up and grimaced, putting a hand to his head. "OK, now it hurts," he groaned. Lily released James' hand and moved to help Remus, but he waved her away.
"S'ok, Lily girl," he muttered. Still looking concerned, Lily slowly sat back in her chair.
"Remus, who was it?"
Remus sighed and rolled his eyes toward the ceiling. "I didn't see them. Whoever it was hit me from behind. So it was probably Severus and his gang of gutless goonies."
Lily gave a derisive snort and nodded. "Bella Lestrange was in here earlier, with her boyfriend Rodolphus and that skinny Calista thing."
Remus nodded. "Well, that pretty much confirms the mystery. I bet Malfoy and Rabastan were along for the fun." With a glance at the sleeping James, he whispered, "He didn't do anything stupid, did he?"
"No," Lily smiled, "no, he was very good. We've been here all day. However, we did run into the twins on the way here and, well....." she let her voice trail off.
"Oh Lord give us strength," Remus mumbled. The twins had quite the reputation. "As long as they don't commit murder--"
"Remember last year when Anthony Nott hexed my friend Sara and the twins caught up with him?" Lily snickered.
"Yeah, it took the teachers a week to find him, and then another two too get that tail removed!" Remus and Lily both choked back their laughter.
Lily grinned. "There should be an extra commandment, 'Thou shalt not-"
"-screw with Autumn and Spike," Remus finished.
"That's perfect!" Lily quietly exclaimed.
"I know," Remus said solemnly. He glanced at Lily and they both laughed again. They muffled their laughter in their hands, trying to keep the volume down.
"So," Remus hiccupped as they settled down, "you wanna talk about it?"
"About what?" she asked him.
"Well, you were holding James' hand but looking at Sirius with a very interesting look on your face. 'Course, it could just be my imagination, but..."
Lily blushed. How long had Remus been awake and watching her? Remus was an extremely good observer. "There's nothing to talk about," she muttered lamely. And if he buys that, I'm Snape's long lost sister.
"They consider each other brothers, Lily." Remus' voice was a whisper of a whisper, but the words cut straight to Lily's heart.
"I know," she whispered back.
"Does James know?"
Lily looked at the ground and shook her head. Cold rushed through her, and she brought her knees to her chest and wrapped her arms around them.
"This will kill them both, you know." She'd never heard Remus sound so serious about anything.
"I know," she whispered again. "Are you going to tell James?"
"It's not my place to do that, Lily. So it's Sirius then?"
Lily closed her eyes and put her head on her knees. "That's just it, Remus. I have no idea. And they both . . . . . . . . . . god, you must think I'm awful."
She could feel Remus' eyes on her but she didn't dare look up. She knew what his eyes would tell her, it was just easier to live with her own guilt.
"Of course not, Lily," Remus said. That was all it took for the tears to begin leaking out of Lily's eyes. She kept her head down so he wouldn't see.
"Lily, you just need to figure what you want."
"Easier said than done," Lily muttered.
"Yeah, I know." She could almost hear Remus smile and smiled at her knees in return. "The thing is, Lil', your life will be livable again only after you make a decision. I can't tell you what that decision is, only you can do that."
Lily sniffled and raised her head to look at the kind face of Remus Lupin.
"How do you know all this," she asked. She wiped the traces of tears from her face as his face turned grim.
"Prefect intuition," he said. Lily rolled her eyes at him and he smiled in response.
James shifted in his sleep, drawing their attention to him. His eyes fluttered, then opened fully and looked around.
"Hey," he said softly to Lily. Then, glancing at Remus, he sat up in his chair. "Hey!" he smiled at his friend. "How ya doin'?"
Remus gave a mournful glance at the ground. "Lily was entertaining me until you woke up," he said reproachfully. "I mean, I was working the whole pity oh-I'm-hurt-but-I'm-ignoring-my-pain-like-a-man-so-love-me angle and I was this close to getting her to do a strip tease for me!" Remus held up his fingers to show them just how close he'd gotten, and then collapsed against the pillows, laughing his head off. Lily swatted at Remus, but she was laughing too.
"Dang, and me without my camera," James cracked.
"James Potter!" Lily cried. Their laughter echoed off the halls. Suddenly, Sirius moaned and tossed his head.
"I think he's waking up," James cried. As he rushed to Sirius' side, Lily and Remus looked at each other. A feeling of understanding shot between the two. She knew the question his eyes were asking her. Lily gazed back sadly, at a loss for words.

*******

Sirius was having the dream again. He knew he was dreaming this time, and he hoped to god he'd never wake up. This was paradise, feeling Lily's hands on his body. He breathed in the scent of her hair and tasted her sweet lips. Her skin was incredibly soft. He lay back on the couch in the Gryffindor common room, Lily sprawled on top of him. Her hands caressed his neck, his clutched at her long silky hair. She leaned slightly to the right and gently nibbled on his ear, causing Sirius to close his eyes and moan in satisfaction. She knew exactly what he wanted.
"Lily, I think I love you," he whispered in her ear. He kissed her neck. Her soft laughter sent shivers down his spine. Her laughter mingled with James', and he thought he heard Remus chuckle. He didn't want them to see him and Lily like this. Sirius struggled to open his eyes, but his head hurt too much. He finally opened his eyes and blinked repeatedly as the ceiling of the hospital wing came into focus. Crap.
"Does it hurt much, mate?" James' voice came at him from the right. Sirius turned his head and drew his breath in a sharp gasp as the pain stab him again. He closed his eyes and leaned back against the pillows.
"No, not at all," he said sarcastically. It's only every time I move, the pain's so bad I see visions of Lucy in the sky with diamonds floating through strawberry fields on her way to Penny Lane, that's all."
The sound of Lily's laughter was music to his ears, and he opened his eyes to find her sitting next to James. He could see the relief in her face. Sirius' heart constricted at the thought that she had actually been worried about him. Then he looked at James and the happy feeling went away as quickly as it had come.
"So, you're normal then! Excellent." Remus deadpanned from his bed. Sirius tossed his pillow in Remus' general direction. Laughing, James settled back into his chair and grasped Lily's hand again. Sirius looked at their linked hands, and then let his gaze wander to their faces. He watched James brush a lock of Lily's fiery red hair from her face, then watched that same hand come back down and cup her cheek. The look in their eyes was unmistakable, and Sirius felt his heart would stop.