Chapter 25: Back Watching
Disclaimer: Not my characters, no money being made, etc., etc.
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"Ouch!…erm, morning Luna," Harry stammered, as he blotted spilt coffee, "did we miss giving you the belt?"
The blonde-haired teen entered Number Four's kitchen wearing the same red "Clan-Potter" dressing gown that Harry was wearing. Except that hers was hanging open over a skimpy mid-drift baring camisole and bright-red knickers.
She reached into the robe's pockets and pulled out the ends of the belt. "No…is that a problem?" she asked with a bit of concern. "I like to air out my navel in the morning…keeps the nargle larvae from nesting, you know."
"Erm, no…that's fine," Harry said. "I'm glad to see that you feel comfortable here…it's just that in the muggle world, erm, well…we usually wear something over our knickers when we're in mixed company…unless we're more than just good friends."
"Oh….sorry," Luna replied as she quickly tied her robe closed. "I thought that it wasn't any different than muggle swimming costumes."
"You're right," Harry replied, trying not to make his houseguest feel bad. "Guess that it's one of those muggle customs…location is everying, I guess….Say, our morning run is at six…maybe you brought some shorts and you could join us?"
Luna's eyes brightened back up. "I didn't, but I can transfigure some…be right back." Harry poured a cup of coffee for Luna while she ran back upstairs to change. She returned with a bounce in her step and ever bigger bounce in a skin-tight t-shirt, forcing Harry to very carefully place his coffee mug on the countertop. Choosing to say nothing, he wondered just how many other surprises were in store with Luna visits to Little Wizarding.
"You're up early…weren't able to sleep?" he asked.
"Ronnie sure snores a lot, doesn't he?" Luna replied. "I could hear them clear across the hall…how do you get any sleep at all in the same room?"
"Six years of practice," Harry replied with a grin. "It's actually gotten better, if you can believe that. Hermione convinced him to start wearing a muggle breathing strip across his nose at night."
"Maybe it will get better once we start sleeping together," Luna said.
"Erm, yes…well, perhaps it will," Harry said, forcing something out of his mouth besides sprayed liquids.
Luna plopped down on a kitchen table chair. "Unless, of course, you and Ron prefer sleeping together."
Harry's head snapped back a bit in shock. "Luna, Ron and I sleep in the same room, but we're not sleeping together."
"Oh…what's the difference?"
"Well…wait, you really don't know, do you?" he asked.
"Don't know what?" Luna replied, confusion clearly displayed on her face.
"When muggles talk about two people sleeping together, they really mean that they are shagging."
"Oh…well if that's the case why don't they just say shag instead of sleep?"
"Erm…good question…usually if two people share a bed they're also shagging…unless you listen to Uncle Vernon, of course," Harry replied with a grin.
"So muggles only shag when they're asleep? Where's the fun in that?"
"Erm, no I guess it's just the most private place to, erm…" Harry caught sight of somebody walking down the hall. "Good morning, Hermione."
"Most private place to do what?" Hermione asked, rubbing sleep from her eyes.
"Oh, Harry and I were just talking about sleeping together," Luna said matter-of-factly.
"Excuse me?"
"We were talking about the phrase 'sleeping together' and how it means more than just sharing a kip," Harry replied quickly.
"Oh," Hermione said, as she looked at Luna and Harry with furrowed brow. "And exactly how did this topic of conversation take place?"
"I told Harry that Ron's snoring might get better if he slept with me."
Wondering whether it really was that innocent, Hermione decided to change topics. "So what got you out of bed so early, Harry?"
"Couldn't sleep," he said wearily. "A bit excited after all of last night's fun, and I knew I had a stack of papers to go through." He had in fact been reviewing an emancipation document that legally severed his Aunt and Uncle's custodial rights over him.
Harry's mobile chirped.
"Good morning, Sir Harry, sorry that it's so early."
"That's fine, Wally, we were already up," Harry replied. "What's going on?"
"There was an accident in London last night that might be of interest to you. A man was struck by a lorry and taken to hospital. The report caught the eye of one of my colleagues when it was noted that the victim was wearing some sort of purse tied to his belt."
"A wizard, eh?" Harry asked.
"Well, I wasn't sure until they e-mailed me some pictures of the crime scene. After all, I've been known to carry a purse around myself now and then. But the style it was so…erm, medieval…it just simply screamed wizard…no offense," Wally added quickly.
"None taken," Harry replied with a smile. "How is this bloke doing right now."
"Just came out of surgery about two hours ago…still in a bad way, though," Wally said. "It happens now and again that a John Doe is really a Merlin Doe, and there are protocols in place for notifying your wizard hospital, but…I thought I'd forward a head shot to you first, since the man is the same height and weight you gave us for that Mundungus chap."
Harry's heart jumped a beat. "Sure…send me the photo and I'll take a look."
"It's already been sent…remember how to check your e-mail using the mobile?"
"Yeah, hang on." Harry pushed a button to place Wally's call on "hold," then changed screens and punched a few more buttons to get to his in-box, where the message was waiting. He opened the attached jpeg, and squinted when the upper torso of the accident victim filled the mobile's display screen.
"What do you think, Hermione?" Harry asked, handing her the device.
"Hard to tell with all that blood splatter," she replied, "but it could be him."
"Let's check it out then," Harry replied.
Hermione nodded and toggled back to the call, letting Wally know that Harry and she wanted to make an identification in person.
"He's bringing the black Bentley around," she said, after ending the call and returning Harry's mobile.
Harry nodded and turned towards Luna, "Would it be alright if we left you here with Ron for a few hours?" he asked.
"Fine with me," Luna replied with a dreamy looking look. "Gives me the chance to work on his snoring problem."
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Hermione leaned forward over the rear-facing bench. "Wally, I'm sorry but would you mind terribly if we rolled the divider up?"
"That's why it's there, Dame Hermione" Wally replied with a smile. "We'll be at hospital in about thirty minutes." He then saved her the trouble and raised the opaque divider between front and rear seats. Hermione leaned back, then stretched out on the bench facing Harry.
She turned a wide yawn into a smile. "Merlin, I'm still sleepy...I could use a kip."
Harry chuckled. "Gee, I wonder why," he replied with a bit of cheek. He then surprised Hermione by pouncing on top of her. "Need a blanket?"
"Got your hopes up about practicing after Luna's comments, Harry?"
Harry reached down and pulled an errant strand of her hair back from her face.
"No," he replied, "I've had those hopes for a little while now."
"Since when?" Hermione asked.
"Since the last time I was stretched out in this motorcar."
Hermione paused for a second to process, then squinted a bit when she arrived at an answer. After squinting she gave Harry a good sock in the arm.
"I thought you were sleeping when I was dressing down your Aunt!"
Harry grinned. "Kind of hard to sleep through the thunderstorm you were brewing."
"Oh," she said quietly. "Guess I did get a little worked up."
"So do you think we could do it?" Harry asked.
"Do what?"
"Watch each other's backs through the night."
"Depends on whether you sleep on your side," Hermione replied.
"What about your parents?"
"I'm more worried about Ron," she said.
"Looks like Luna might be a help there," Harry said. "So when do you want to try?"
"Think you can behave yourself until third date?"
"Does last night count?"
"Erm…yes, I think so," Hermione said with a smile. "But that's only one, and next time I'm expecting you to do the planning, not Mum."
"Fair enough, I guess," Harry said, mustering all of the sincerity he could gather at that moment, "I think that I can…that is, if you think you can keep your hands off of me."
"My hands?" Hermione asked, with a sparkle in her eye. She shoved her two hands down the rear pockets of Harry's trousers and gave a firm squeeze. "After last night…you're the one worrying about my hands?"
"You didn't seem to mind."
Hermione raised her head up and gave Harry's nose a quick peck. "No, I didn't, did I?"
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Mundungus Fletcher had never smelled a room as sterile as the one within which he regained consciousness. It was quite unnerving…almost as unnerving as the fact that his eyes were almost completely wrapped in white gauze and that he was breathing through a tube that was shoved down his throat.
"Why Dung, you are alive…so nice to see you again, though I dare say I've never seen you quite so….clean."
Dung tried, but failed, to turn his head towards the voice.
"Whoa, watch it there, Dung…the doctors have your necked braced for a reason…what… what's that? Oh yes, and the tube is there because you weren't breathing too well without it. You see, for some reason, these muggle doctors actually think your sorry excuse for a life is worth saving."
Dung's eyes were able to move, and once they regained their ability to resolve the image that was presently hovering above his face the result wasn't very encouraging.
"Yes, Dung, it's me, Harry…you know, the kid you left to Dementors while you were off pawning stolen goods…the kid whose mansion you stole from…and before you try to apparate, don't bother…you've been ankled with an anti-app bracelet."
Dung could barely feel something around one of his legs, but was in no position to see what it was.
"So here's the situation. The muggles found you left for dead after being struck by a lorry outside of a pawn shop. Your head's a right mess, and your brain is still so swollen that the doctors think they'll have to operate again….yes, Dung…again. They've already drilled a few holes into your skull to reduce the swelling."
Mung didn't think that doctor's trying to save his life could have anything to do with drills and his skull.
"Nurse tells me that if they have to go back in it won't be drills, this time but a saw."
Dung's eyes narrowed in fright.
"Oh, now Dung, I knew you'd be worrying about that, so I thought I help ease your concerns. Nurse let me borrow one of the tools they'd be using." Harry held a small battery-operated rotary saw over Dung's head that was about the size of an electric toothbrush, with a 5cm diameter circular saw blade held perpendicular to the grip.
"See these muggles, they use technology to make things so much smaller, and quieter," Harry explained. "Would you like a demonstration?" Harry pressed a button on the handle and the circular blade began to twirl with a soft, but high-pitched whine that had Dung's full attention.
"Of course, you wouldn't need all of the knives and drills and saws cutting into your body if you were at St. Mungo's, now would you? So I have a simple proposition…I'm going have the doctors take that tube out of your mouth, and you're going to tell me where I can find a locket that you took from the Black mansion. Then we're going to get it, and when we do, I'll see to it that the healers at St. Mungo's fix you up."
"Deal…or no deal?"
Three hours later, Harry returned to Dung's hospital room with Hermione and Wally by his side and the real Slytherin's locket in the front pants pocket opposite the one which contained the fake.
"Well, wonders never cease, it was right where you told me it was…and I only had to pay two hundred quid to get it back."
"I may be a thief," Mundungus said weakly, "but I'm no liar."
Harry walked over to the bed and pulled the tape off of the magazine that had been wrapped around Dung's led. Dung's eyes went wide as Harry showed it to him and Wally began to wheel the hospital bed out to a waiting ambulance for the ride to St. Mungo's.
"Well I'm no thief," Harry said, "but I have been known to stretch the truth some times myself. Guess we'll have to call it even."
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Harry and Hermione had hoped to test their badge's ability to transport them across Little Wiz's goblin wards, but Ron wasn't answering their call. Sir Evan, of course, had his badge operant for what turned out to be a successful test. The return trip to Number Four wasn't quite as successful, from a time efficiency standpoint. First was the fifteen minute chat with Sir Evan, who was thrilled with his new accommodations now that his things had been packed up and delivered from the nursing home in Eastleigh. Then there was the meeting with Nurse Miller and her entire family, who had returned to Little Whiz that morning to look at the possibility of moving into Number Twelve, at least for the summer. Once they got out to the street, they were met by Hermione's parents, who wanted to talk about how well the party had gone, and give word that three additional muggle-born families had already expressed interest in moving to Little Wiz.
It was some sixty minutes after their "instantaneous" arrival on Privet Drive that Harry and Hermione entered the front door of Number Four. They found the house empty, save for Ron and the Xbox. He informed them that Luna had floo'd back to her house to pack her things, having secured her father's permission to accept Harry's offer for her to stay with them in Little Wiz. Brian had driven out to the Lovegood residence to pick up Luna and her things, having decided that it be safer if the Luna's move was muggled. This rather conveniently allowed the Trio to talk about horcrux disposal.
Harry was inclined to immediately make the trip to Hogwarts and the Chamber of Secrets to find a loose basilisk fang lying about to smash upon the horcrux. Hermione, after scolding Harry a bit for his typical impetuousness, suggested that it would be prudent to wait until the Twins were able to furnish them with the protective dragon hide body suits that they'd ordered. She also pointed out that Harry still couldn't legally use magic (at least where it could be detected), and that there wasn't much downside if they waited until things were properly prepared…except, of course, for the fact that waiting would mean that they'd have a little piece of Lord Voldemort's soul to constantly safeguard.
The three spent some time balancing the pros and cons of waiting to attempt to destroy the horcrux before Harry struck upon the idea of asking MI-5 ¾ to hide the locket until they were ready to dispose of it. Ron initially scoffed at the idea of muggles having a place secure enough, but Hermione came to Harry's aid, pointing out that it would be hard to find a place less secure than when the locket was in Mundungus's possession.
And so, after transfiguring a breakfast cereal box into a wooden chest and securing the locket with Hermione's most intricate charm work, Harry tucked the horcrux under his arm and they walked across the street to Number Five, where Wally promised to "Indiana Jones" the container (until such time as Harry wanted it back). Wally subsequently promised to deliver a DVD of "Raiders of the Lost Ark" so that Ron would understand the movie reference.
Harry told Ron and Hermione that he had some business stuff that he needed to discuss with her Dad, and suggested that he'd catch up with them in a bit. He then walked up to Number Five's operations center, where Mr. Granger was taking his turn monitoring the neighborhood's surveillance system.
Harry knocked on the open door. "Mr. Granger, do you have a few minutes?" he asked.
Roger Granger swiveled around on his chair and gave Harry a smile. "Of course, Harry, have a seat."
"Thanks," Harry replied, as he sat down and focused on the questions and statements that he'd been rehearsing in his mind for most of the day. "Erm, wanted to say thanks again for the party last night…it was brilliant."
"It was nothing, Harry….and everything that you deserved to celebrate," Bill said.
Harry took a breath. "Mr. Granger, I'd like to…erm…wanted you to know…well, I'm hoping that you aren't too concerned about the feelings I expressed last night about your daughter."
Mr. Granger smiled. "Why would Emily and I be concerned…we already knew how you two felt about each other, and what you said was…well Emily for one thought it was sweet."
"Erm, thanks," Harry replied. "I guess I just wanted to reassure you that, even with the Dursleys gone that you can trust me with your daughter and her, erm…virtue."
Roger squinted just a bit and nodded almost imperceptivity, finally understanding the reason for Harry's visit.
"Worrying what we might think now that you two almost have the run of the house?" he asked.
Harry nodded.
"Harry," Mr. Granger replied, "what I said two weeks ago still holds true. We trust you with Hermione's life, and everything that goes with it. We've trusted Hermione to make wise decisions for longer than that. Nothing you two have done since that time has shaken that trust."
"I appreciate that, Mr. Granger, it's just that you might think that…especially know that Ron and Luna there, well…"
Roger chuckled. "Harry, I appreciate the fact that you were concerned enough to come talk to me. Not too many teenage boys would do that. But we trust you two to do what you think is right for the both of you. Fact is that both of you are full of virtue, and that's not going to change regardless of whatever happens in your relationship."
Harry couldn't believe what he was hearing and his faced showed as much.
"Harry, Roger continued, "you and Hermione live in a dangerous world at a particularly dangerous time. Emily and I have already talked about this, and given a choice, we'd frankly feel better knowing you two were watching each other's back night and day…and I do mean night and day. Am I making myself clear?"
Harry stood, and nodded as he reached out his hand.
"Thank you, Mr. Granger, I promise not to let you down."
Roger shook Harry's hand, placing his other on Harry's shoulder. "I know, Harry…I know."
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Hours later, a waning moon cast light onto four intertwined feet at the base of Hermione's four poster bed.
"Harry," Hermione said looking back over her shoulder, "don't you want to snuggle some more?"
"I promised your dad I'd watch your back," Harry replied, as he traced his fingertips over Hermione's gown-covered shoulder blade.
Hermione turned so quickly that Harry didn't have time to move his hand away as it was dragged onto her chest. "Harry Potter, you didn't tell my dad that we were thinking about this, did you?"
"Of course not," Harry replied had a smile. "he was too busy talking about something called 'plausible deniability.'"
Hermione slapped at Harry's chest. "Merlin, he did what? And you really were talking about this weren't you?"
"I'm sorry, Hermione, but I just had to," Harry replied.
Hermione smiled, then pulled Harry's head in for a languid kiss. "Well whatever you said must have been reassuring, else we'd have seen Dad camped outside our door."
"Of course it was," Harry replied, "it wasn't like I was asking for permission to ask you to marry me."
Hermione giggled. "Well that's good to know."
Harry gave her an evil grin. "Saving that question for next week."