The Lies We Believe
All along the watchtower
Princes kept the view
While all the women came and went
Bare-foot servants to, but huh
Outside in the cold distance
A wild cat did growl
Two riders were approachin'
And the wind began to howl
(All Along The Watchtower-Bob Dylan/Jimi Hendrix)
~*~
Dear Harry,
What the hell?! You are being a downright prat! You can't ignore us like this, you can't just ship us off to school and cut contact with us completely. This is more than just being in the Auror program because you find time to send flowers to Ginny, you insensitive cad! And you can't use the excuse that you don't want to put us in danger because we are already in the thick of it. I told you I wasn't going to sit around and wait for you to defeat Voldemort and neither is Ron. We're your best friends, Harry. You can't desert us like this.
"Anything you want to add?" Hermione asked as Ron read over the letter.
"Yeah, tell him thanks for the mirror, the git," Ron grumbled.
Hermione signed the letter and tied it to a school owl that promptly flew away. Together they walked out of the owlery, the air was turning crisp as the leaves turned to a lovely rust color, signaling the start of Fall. As the two of them entered the Great Hall for breakfast, Ron's eyes fell on the Ravenclaw table where Michael had an arm around Luna's waist. He rolled his eyes and sat down next to Dean, his back to the couple, he didn't need to see the jerk groping her. Hermione, surprisingly, sat down on the other side of Lavender and Parvati.
After awhile, Parvati leaned toward Hermione. "Psst, Hermione you're staring at Neville," she said.
Hermione picked at the cinnamon roll held up in front of her. "I just can't figure him out," she said softly.
Lavender looked at him. "What do you mean?"
"I mean, can't you see it? He's cute in the quiet guy kind of way," Hermione said in fake thoughtfulness.
Lavender and Parvati glanced at back over at him. He was quietly eating his cereal listening to his more rowdy roommates discuss the upcoming Quidditch match.
"I guess so," Parvati said cautiously.
Hermione pressed further. "He's just got that…mysteriousness about him." She grinned inwardly when the two girls looked back over at Neville, curious looks crossing their faces.
"I mean, he's shy and all," she continued. "But what if underneath that shyness is a lion ready to pounce." The three girls all tilted their heads to reappraise the quietest Gryffindor. "I'm going to ask him if he wants to be my study partner tonight. We can finish our Transfiguration together," Hermione leaped up out of her seat and made her way to Neville.
Lavender and Parvati stared at her. "Who does she think she is?" Lavender pouted.
"Look at her, draping herself over him like a floozy," Parvati added.
"Hey Neville," Hermione said as she sat down next to him.
"Hey Hermione," he greeted her.
"Listen, I was wondering if you wanted to do our Transfiguration homework together," she said. "Ron's busy with Quidditch and it would be nice to study with someone who actually paid attention in class."
"I guess so. I mean, it's not my strongest class," he said tentatively.
"Don't be silly," Hermione said, then added quickly. "I'll see you at seven." Then she left the table before he could back out of it.
~*~
It was logical and it was reasonable.
Ginny = Safe; Uncomplicated; Lazy summers at the burrow; One big happy Weasley family.
Hermione = Chaos; A tangle of emotions; Un-fucking-believable sex; she's your best friend.
She's dating your other best friend.
The heating vent in his floor opened and Isis slithered through. "There'ss a girl in one of the roomss," she hissed. Harry remembered that Nathan had smuggled in one of the women he had picked up in the pub last night.
"They'd better keep it down over there. I don't want to be running through that obstacle course over and over today," he muttered as he read his defense manual.
Isis slithered up on to his bed. "You don't bring girlsss to your room." Harry didn't reply, only turned a page in his book. "Do you have a girl?"
"What's with all the questions?" Harry asked irritably as he put his book down.
"Jusst curiousss," she replied. "You ssseem awfully lonely."
"I'm not lonely," he defended. "I'm not. Really. I have a girl. Her name is…Ginny." There. He said it. He admitted it and it became final. He had to push his betraying thoughts of Hermione out of his mind. He already had enough chaos and turmoil in his life, his love life should not be as complicated. Ginny would bring him peace, being with her had been the most problem-free weeks of his life. Why turn his back on that?
Isis raised herself to eye-level with him and a feeling of unease settled into him as she regarded him with her reptilian eyes. After awhile, she backed down.
"If you sssay ssso," she said as she slithered off of the bed.
If I say so? What the hell did that mean? "Don't you have some mice to eat?"
*
Captain Fuller watched as Harry made his way through the training room, effortlessly dodging spells that the room threw at him. "He's the best one out there," he said proudly to the two men in the room, his boss Kingsley Shacklebolt and a man he didn't know named Mr. Lupin. They, too, were watching the young man as he made his way to the finish, the lights going up to signal the end.
The Captain pushed the button, "Well done Potter. O'Malley you're up." He turned and faced the men," He didn't even get hit once."
The looks on their faces, however, were unimpressed.
"Put him in the third year training program," Kingsley said.
"What, now?"
"Send him in again."
"But…there are darker creatures in there and spells we haven't covered in class yet," the Captain protested.
"Send him in anyway," Kingsley ordered.
Reluctantly, the Captain turned away and pushed a button, causing the lights in the training room to turn on, ending O'Malley's turn.
"O'Malley, take a rest. Send Potter back in."
They watched as Harry, curious himself, cautiously stepped inside the room. As soon as the room sealed itself, a hex was sent his way and he barely dodged out of the way. The hex repeatedly fired at him until he found some protection behind a nearby wall. He was immediately attacked again when a sparring dummy appeared out of nowhere.
"Amazing," Captain Fuller said as he watched his youngest trainee hold his own in the room. Harry wandlessly and wordlessly sent rubbish bins flying toward his next attacker, rendering it stupid long enough for Harry to get a good Stupefy in. Shacklebolt and Lupin stepped forward watching Harry as he dueled with another dummy with frenzy.
"Send in a boggart," Lupin said, stepping forward.
"A boggart is nothing compared to the skill of the dummies in there," Captain Fuller protested.
"Send it in," Shacklebolt ordered and Captain Fuller pressed a button, releasing a boggart into the room. The men watched as the boggart approached Harry, turning into the form of a young woman with long brown curly hair. Harry was distracted only for a moment by its appearance but it was long enough for the sparring dummy to land a good hex on him, sending Harry flying across the room.
The lights on the room immediately turned on, everything disappearing because you were required to get through the room without taking a hit until you reached the end. If you did, your session was cut short. Harry staggered to hit feet, rubbing an area on his chest where the spell hit.
"Give us a moment," Shacklebolt asked and the Captain left the two men in the room.
"His only weakness," Kingsley sighed. "He excels in everything else but he can't handle his boggart."
"I've had experience with the boy and his boggarts. He can handle them just fine but it's the form that the boggart takes that is distracting him," Remus said softly. "When he first confronted them in his third year, it took the shape of a Dementor. Now it concerns me that the shape is now Miss Granger, sometimes with Mister Weasley."
"I noticed that, too," Kingsley said. "Why is his deepest fear suddenly his best friends?"
"I don't think he's necessarily afraid of them," Remus explained. "With the two of them gone off to Hogwarts, I think his deepest fear is of…being alone." There was a brief silence following this. "Is he ready, Kingsley?"
"There's only one way we can tell," he replied. "Put him out in the field."
~*~
Hermione could feel her eyes burning into her from two tables away. If Lavender could hex her with a look she would. Hermione and Neville sat quietly in the library doing their Transfiguration homework like she said they would with Neville once in awhile stopping her to ask a question or clarify a point.
Right about now, she figured that she worked Lavender into a big enough frenzy to swoop in like a vulture. "Neville," Hermione said, "I'm going to go get a book. I'll be back."
"Yeah, okay," he said as he scribbled some notes on his piece of parchment.
She slipped out of her chair and headed into the stacks, hiding so she could see what was going on through the slats in the bookshelves. As predicted, Lavender made her move.
"Hello Neville," she said in a flirtatious voice.
"Er…hello?" Neville said, taken aback by the way his classmate had spoken to him.
Lavender slid into Hermione's seat, scooting closer to him. Neville leaned slightly away from her, his face looking a little flushed.
"I'm having a little trouble in Herbology and I was wondering if you would be willing to help me out tomorrow night?"
"Um, sure," Neville managed to stumble out.
"Great!" Lavender leaned in close to him. "I'll see you tomorrow then," she said in a breathy voice, tracing her finger lightly across his cheek. Neville was bright red by the time she left his side.
Hermione was counting on the pettiness of her former roommates, so the next day, while Lavender was studying with Neville, Hermione let it slip to Parvati before she went on her rounds.
"That little tart!" Parvati breathed.
"I know," Hermione sighed. "Did you see the way she was leaning toward him? That's an open sexual invitation." Parvati stared at her. "I read about it," Hermione finished. She did read about…somewhere, maybe in her mother's magazines.
At dinner the next night, Dean informed the Gryffindors that Neville and Parvati would not be joining them for dinner because they had detention to serve in the greenhouse.
"Neville got detention in Herbology?" Ginny said, disbelieving. Hermione gave a small smile when she saw Lavender sulking.
That night, Hermione stayed up late in the Gryffindor common room studying while Ron did some last minute changes in his Quidditch playbook. Their first game was tomorrow against Ravenclaw, which already irked Ron. Furthermore, she had heard from Seamus that Michael Corner was their new Keeper. She was sure Ron was just spitting fire at that news.
The portrait swung open and Parvati and a thoroughly roughed up Neville walked in. Hermione kicked Ron slightly under the table and he looked up at her then over at the couple.
"Night Neville," Parvati said at the bottom of the stairs before leaving his side.
Hermione and Ron shared a look. Neville had some lipstick still on his face and his hair was messy, his clothes rumpled.
"Night guys," he said in a daze to Ron and Hermione.
"Goodnight," they responded back as he walked up the stairs.
"Hey Neville?" Hermione called out to him.
"Yeah?"
"You did really well in DADA today. Fifteen points for a Patronus. We really needed that," she said sincerely.
"Thanks," he grinned at her.
"Unbelievable," Ron whispered when Neville was out of earshot. "Parvati, huh?" Hermione shrugged in innocence.
*
There was an excited buzz in the air with the first game of the season, a much anticipated match of Ravenclaw vs. Gryffindor. Ernie and Hermione patrolled the rapidly emptying corridors, steering the first years in the direction of the pitch and making sure that the empty classrooms were indeed empty after all.
"I'll see you there?" he asked her.
"Yeah, I'll just head to the Gryffindor common room to make sure it's all cleared out," she said and Ernie nodded, grinning as he left her. "Good luck to your house."
She leaned against a pillar, staring out from the balcony at the crowd headed to the pitch. A wave of sadness and nostalgia washed over her at the memory of watching Harry play, standing with her fellow Gryffindors and screaming her voice hoarse cheering him on.
A group of students caught her eye and she noticed Blaise Zabini walking with Crabbe and Goyle. Malfoy was not with them. Hermione immediately made her way to the Slytherin common room. At the front of their portrait, she inserted her badge into a little notch beside it, automatically it swung open and she stepped through.
"What are you doing here?" Pansy Parkinson greeted her.
"Where's Malfoy?" she asked.
"Upstairs. He's sick."
"Show me."
Pansy scoffed and got up off the sofa she was resting on, leading Hermione up the stairs to Draco's dormitory. She opened the door and Hermione peered in to see Draco curled up on his bed, snoring softly.
"You see?" Pansy whispered.
"What are you doing here, then?" Hermione asked as Pansy closed the door.
"I'm staying in case he needs anything," she answered.
"I'd figure he'd use house elves," Hermione said sardonically.
"He's not into house elves in that way, if you get my meaning," Pansy smirked. "Although I doubt you do."
Hermione narrowed her eyes at the girl then left the room, satisfied that Draco was occupied. However, as she approached the third floor landing, she saw Malfoy walking ahead of her and she quickly darted into an alcove.
What the hell?
She knew there was no way he passed her in the halls. What was going on? What was he up to?
She peeked around the corner and saw that he had walked into the alcove of the humped witch.
"Dissendium," she heard him whisper, then a faint scraping sound.
How did he find out about that?
Her first instinct was to run to Ron and tell him what had happened. But then she realized that, duh of course, he was on the pitch. So she turned and ran to the Headmistress' office.
"Sorry lass, she's not in," one of the gargoyles said to her.
"She may have gone to the Quidditch pitch," said the other.
Unbelievable, maybe she could talk to a teacher or find an auror.
"Oh sod it," she said and ran back to the third floor. She tapped the witch on the rump (Dissendium!) and made her way down the dark passage. She ran in the darkness, doing her best to catch up with Malfoy who had a big head start.
She paused when she caught sight of him up ahead of her, the tip of his wandlight shining in the darkness. She whispered Nox, snuffing hers out as she followed him.
He pushed up the trapdoor and raised himself up and out of the passage. Hermione waited a few moments before following him. Pushing the same door open, she lifted it only slightly to see if there was anyone around. The cellar was silent, not a word. Seeing that no one was around Hermione, lifted herself out of the passage.
As luck would have it, she didn't lose Malfoy's trail. She heard his voice faintly coming from somewhere.
She followed it to a door in the cellar that led to the alley, possibly where the owner's of Honeydukes received their merchandise. His muffled voice was heard outside of this door and Hermione pressed her ear to it.
"I left the manor," she heard a woman's voice say. "Severus said it wasn't safe. Dammit Lucius!"
"Where will you go?" Draco asked.
"I don't know."
"I want to go with you, mum." Hermione's eyes widened when she heard this.
"Oh, sweetheart. It isn't safe."
"I don't care!"
"I do. Draco, they'll hunt you down and find you. Being a Death Eater is a role you can't run away from, you serve the Dark Lord for…life," her voice cracked at the end of this sentence and Hermione heard a muffled sob. "I curse your father everyday for putting you through this," she said with bitter hate in her voice. "Why? Why are they doing this to me? Why has the Dark Lord turned against our family? Even my own sister…"
"I'm so sorry," Draco said. "Dammit!" His fist hit the door and Hermione started, jumping back and knocking over a stack of crates.
"Shit!" she whispered, managing to save them from crashing to the floor but the door opened and Draco and Narcissa Malfoy stared at her.
*
"GO GO GRYFFINDOR! GO GO GRYFFINDOR!"
The cheers of the crowd energized Ron as he hovered, keeping guard on the goals as Ginny sent another quaffle flying past Corner.
"And Gryffindor has another goal making the game 40-0!"
Ron chanced a glance in the crowd and still couldn't find Hermione in the stands. He resisted the temptation to look on the Ravenclaw side. He already made that mistake earlier and a hot swoop of anger hit him unexpectedly when he saw Luna in the stands with a giant bird on her head cheering on their keeper.
He brought his attention back to the game as a Ravenclaw chaser came barreling at him, tossing the quaffle. Ron, mentally picturing it as Corner's head, quickly caught it and sent it flying into Ginny's waiting hands. A bludger was sent towards Corner but he quickly ducked out of the way.
"Shame," Ron muttered.
Suddenly, there was a roar of cheers from the Ravenclaw side.
"THE SNITCH HAS BEEN CAUGHT! THE SNITCH HAS BEEN CAUGHT! RAVENCLAW WINS THE MATCH!"
There was a groan from the Gryffindor side as the Ravenclaw team hugged and cheered as they sank to the ground. The Gryffindors set down on the field and made the long slow walk to the locker room in defeat.
"Good game everyone," Ron said to his team as they sat in the locker room. Words of inspiration failed to come to him. "We'll get them next time."
The team slowly and silently filed out. Ginny passed by him and put a comforting hand on her brother's shoulder. When all was silent and he was left alone, he threw down his gloves and sat on the bench.
His first game as captain and they lost 150-40.
"You did really well out there," came a soft voice. Ron looked up to see Luna standing in the doorway, ridiculous hat off of her head.
"We lost," he said quietly.
Luna walked over to him and knelt down in front of him. "But you were an excellent Keeper. You didn't let a single quaffle through!"
"Yeah, whatever," he muttered. "Shouldn't you be celebrating with your boyfriend?" he said bitterly.
Her hand reached out and softly, tentatively caressed his cheek and before he knew it, her lips brushed against his in the faintest of kisses before she pulled away, getting up and leaving the locker room.
Ron sat there stunned, the memory of the feel of her lips burned into his mind. In a daze, he left the locker room and headed toward the pitch. It was empty now and he was all alone. Not that it mattered.
"YES!" he shouted out and raised his hands in triumph before he fell backwards, spread eagle on the soft sand underneath him. He stared up at the blue sky, puffy white clouds floated by, a goofy grin on his face.
Quidditch was the best game…ever.
*
"Granger!" Draco hissed.
There was a clatter on the floor above them and the sound of someone coming down the stairs.
"Go! Mum, go!" Draco said as he closed the door and locked it. He grabbed Hermione by her forearm and opened the trapdoor, shoving her down into the passage before following her.
Hermione scrambled away from him, crawling on the floor but she felt a hand wrap around her ankle. She let out a scream but Draco covered her mouth with his hand, his body weight pressed against her back as they lay on the floor.
"Shut up," he hissed in her ear.
They could hear footfalls above them, walking all around the cellar above them before disappearing as they headed up the stairs.
"Get off of me!" Hermione hissed as she elbowed him. He let out a grunt and rolled off of her, letting her go free as she scrambled to her feet. She hit her head sharply on the ceiling of the tunnel, disorienting her for a moment.
Once again, Draco grabbed her ankle, tripping her again. She landed with a thud and tasted blood in her mouth. She had cut her lip. She flipped on her back and raised her wand to him.
"Don't!" he snarled and straddled Hermione pinning her to the floor. He grabbed her wrist and slammed it repeatedly on the floor until she let go of it in reflex and he brushed it aside. Hermione kicked and scratched at him but Draco reached back and hit her across the face with the back of his hand.
"Nosy little mudblood!" he spat at her. "How much did you hear?"
"Enough," she replied roughly. "Why are the Death Eaters after your mother?"
"Is Potter after the horcruxes?"
Hermione brought her hands together in a fist above her head and sent them down hard, hitting Draco in the groin. He cried out and rolled off Hermione and she flipped over, searching in the dark for her wand, hands feeling the damp dirt. Draco crawled over to her and grabbed the hair on her head, slamming her head on the ground. Hermione saw stars and the darkness of the tunnel began to get darker.
She would not pass out. She would not lose conscious in this tunnel alone with Malfoy.
"I knew it!" he said and scrambled off of her.
"No!" Hermione grabbed his leg and yanked with all her might. "I'm not letting you go running off to your little Death Eaters!"
He turned and pounced on her, fingers wrapping around her neck and pressing her against the wall behind her.
"Accio wand," he said and her wand flew into his hand. To her surprise, he let go of her and handed it back to her. "You keep my secret, I'll keep yours. I don't need your little Order finding out about my mum." He touched his wand to hers, wrapping his arm around hers. "Fidelius," he said.
Hermione stared at him.
"Say it Granger!"
"Fidelius," she whispered.
"I swear to keep everything that transpired here a secret," he said.
"I…I swear to keep everything that transpired here a secret," she repeated.
"I swear not to tell a single soul living or not that Harry Potter is searching for Lord Voldemort's horcruxes," Draco said.
Tears fell down Hermione's face. "I swear not to tell a single soul living or not that Narcissa Malfoy is running and hiding from her Death Eaters and that Draco Malfoy will help her escape."
He moved his wand away from her. "And just for good measure," he made a slashing motion with his wand and Hermione felt a sharp sting across her chest, Draco winced at the same time. "Now we'll know if we break this promise. Got the idea from you," he said and pointed to his forehead. "S-N-E-A-K."
"I hate you," she glared at him, wiping the tears from her face.
"Feeling's mutual Granger," he replied. "But I love my mother and I would do anything, anything, to keep her safe."
"Do they know? Your friends?"
Draco scoffed. "They're not my friends. They like me for my money and now that that is fading, they fear me because I'm a Death Eater. They think I'm still doing their bidding."
"And you aren't?" she said sharply.
Draco glared at her. "We're done here." And with that, he walked away from her.
Hermione sat for a while more, fighting the sobs that threatened to spill from her. What had just happened? Did it really happen? She staggered to her feet and a sharp pain shot up her leg. It was painful to stand on it so it took longer than usual to get out of the tunnel, and it took a lot more energy. She was tired and sweaty when she stepped out from behind the statue. The castle was filled with laughter and voices. The match must be over. She stepped out into the landing and immediately ran into Ernie.
"Hermione!" he said with concern, taking in her appearance.
"Ernie," she said before exhaustion completely took her over and she collapsed. He caught her before she could fall.
She woke up some time later in the hospital wing, a familiar head of red hair was resting on her bed.
"Hey, you're awake," he said softly.
"I missed the match, how did you do?" she asked.
Ron stared at her. "Hermione what the hell happened to you?"
"I…had a little accident on my way out to the pitch. I fell on the stairs and I guess I must have passed out."
She could tell by the look on his face that he wasn't buying it. But he didn't press her about it. "I'm going to tell McGonagall you're up. She was concerned about you."
She felt horrible about lying to him and she watched him as he left the hospital wing. She put the curtains all around her, giving her some privacy as she silently began to sob.
~*~
"When you arrive at Azkaban, you will obey Auror Freeman. You will not make contact with the Dementors, nor will you give them reason or cause to make contact with you," the captain said as Harry and his group stood at attention. For the first time he was dressed in the requisite black Auror robes, still not official like those who had gone on past training, but it made him feel more like the part of the group that he was training with. "You will carry a bar of chocolate on you at all times. You will learn proper protocol and paperwork when admitting a prisoner into Azkaban. Do not talk to the prisoners. Do not answer them if they talk to you."
The group huddled around a portkey, a faded fedora, waiting for it to be activated. Harry felt the familiar and queasy pull as he and his group were transported to Azkaban. A feeling of unease settled upon him as he gazed upon the wizard prison. There were more than a few unsavory characters within these walls that would love to wring his little neck, not to mention the effect the Dementors had on him.
A tall auror approached them. "My name is Freeman. I will be your instructor today on proper Azkaban protocol. Follow me if you will for a tour of the facilities." Harry raised the hood of his cloak over his head as they proceeded into the building.
"This is the minimum security area. Wizards and witches held here have usually done petty crimes although we do have some murderers and those charged with assault here." The group filed past large cells with long metals bars on them. A handful of Dementors hovered in the corners of the room and Harry did his best to avoid them, feeling their cold clamminess seep into his insides.
They moved through several gated doors with multiple locks and charms on them. "This is the maximum security area. We hold our most serious offenders in here. We are currently holding several Death Eaters here that we had captured during a failed ministry raid nearly two years ago."
Harry stared straight ahead, from the corner of his eye he saw a head of pale blond hair and knew immediately that Lucius Malfoy was in the cell. The others were not so distinguishable and Harry just wanted to hurry and get the hell out of this room.
His scar gave a slight twinge and he rubbed it as they walked further into the building. "This is our booking area," Freeman explained. "This is where the prisoners are first brought in to be processed and where we will begin our lesson."
"Ah!" Harry gasped in pain as his scar throbbed violently.
"Harry! What is it?" Brian asked, coming to his side.
"We need to get out of here!" Harry gasped.
"What?"
BOOM!!!
A loud and large explosion sent dust, rock and debris flying at them as everyone hit the ground.
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