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Hopelessly Addicted
Chapter 11
"Warring Hearts"
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Thought that I would fail without you, but I'm on top
Thought it would be over by now, but it won't stop
Thought that I would self-destruct, but I'm still here
Even in my years to come, I'm still gonna be here
I'm a survivor, I'm not gonna give up…
Destiny's Child, "Survivor"
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"What are you doing here, Evans?"
The disgust and animosity in Kate Malshirn's voice was blatant. Lily faced the newcomer, clenching her fists and glowering.
Alain stared at his girlfriend with amazement. Boy, if he'd been on the receiving end of that glare, he would probably have fled as fast as he could. What had this girl done to receive such withering hatred?
James grimaced. He had always tried to prevent this meeting from happening. Lily really hated Kate - understandably.
"What are you doing here, Malshirn?"
"I was sent here by the Minister himself," she replied snootily, putting her hands on her hips. "You?"
"I'm one of the Chief Aurors in charge."
Kate nodded slowly and turned to James. "Well, Jamie, it looks like you're going to have to make a choice."
"Okay, girls, look -"
Lily snorted, recognising his conciliatory tone. "I'm not working with her."
"And I'm not working with her," Kate hurried to echo.
"But look, we're all professionals, right?" he tried to pacify them. "I'm sure we can -"
"Screw professionalism!" Kate exclaimed. "I'm not working with Lily Evans, and that's that!"
Lily turned to James. "I can't, I'm sorry," she said with misleading calmness. "If she stays… I'll have to go."
"You need me here, Jamie - the Minister chose me personally."
"Merlin… What did I do to deserve this?" James muttered, frowning.
The two girls stared at him, disbelieving. "Excuse me?" they shrieked in near unison.
James raised his arms defensively. "It was rhetorical!"
"We really have no time to lose, James," Lily stated. "Please make up your mind."
"I -"
James didn't really know what to do. Of course he preferred working with Lily - there was certainly no doubt about that -, but he knew that the Carl Bennett, the English Minister, could be very irritable when people messed with his favourite subordinates. And Kate Malshirn, unfortunately, happened to be his current mistress.
Nevertheless, James was no modest Ministry worker. He knew very well that the Minister needed Lily and him in their current positions. But he also knew that no one should challenge Bennett lightly…
There was really only one thing to do.
"I'll be right back," James said resolutely, standing. He had to try to find a diplomatic solution to this dilemma, and that would probably involve talking to Bennett himself.
Lily and Kate scowled.
"Don't kill each other while I'm gone, if possible."
The two girls stared after him, both surprised and offended by his indecisiveness.
"Well, Evans," Kate spat with evident abhorrence, "it looks like Jamie's no longer as biased as he used to be."
"Yes… You choose your bed buddies well."
"I do, don't I? Your envy entertains me immensely."
Lily's hollow, ironic laugh was downright frightening to most of the people in the room. "Do you really think I envy you? Why on earth -"
"Oh, but of course you envy me! Unlike you, I can have any guy I want." Kate's eyes twinkled with malicious satisfaction. "Including any of your boyfriends, just in case you forgot."
Lily bit her lower lip to prevent herself from snapping. After taking a deep breath, she said simply, "I haven't forgotten."
"Oh, I definitely see that. I mean, really. All these years have gone by, and you two still haven't moved on - since our fifth year! Eight years, Evans. Eight years. One would think you would have learned -"
"I was -"
"Please - face the facts. I single-handedly ruined your life, and made you spend the last six years in emotional hell."
"No. I moved on, Malshirn."
Lily paused for a second to ponder that she really didn't care about just how truthful she was around Kate. All that mattered was revenge. Lily had to humiliate her in all ways possible.
"And I didn't fail to notice," she continued with a slight grin, "that you haven't managed to get your filthy claws on him since Hogwarts."
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I feel surrounded, confounded, emotionally dumbfounded
To think you've nearly won your game
You say you had a girl with problems - did it lead to heartache and confusion?
Did you wake up in tears, not knowing where you are?
Did you get it in the ear, like I did? I bet she never told you
Everything that drifted through her mind, all the secret thoughts…
Craig David, "Woman Trouble"
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"You bitch," Kate hissed through gritted teeth. "I didn't get to him because I didn't want to get to him! I can seduce him any -"
Lily smiled with ferocious delight. "Oh, but you can't. Anyway, that's not really any of my business anymore, now is it?"
"'Over him,' are you?"
"Yes," she replied coolly.
"Oh, sure."
Lily raised an eyebrow.
"So you wouldn't care if I fucked him right in front of you, right? You wouldn't care if I did all sort of things to your boyfriend on your sheets, effortlessly removing any thoughts of you from his head, making him call out my name instead -"
"Shut up," Lily whispered fiercely, clenching her fists. She couldn't help herself; she knew that it was an unforgivable mistake to let Kate know that the sickening boasting was affecting her, but -'
"Because I did that, you know," Kate continued spitefully, "I made him say he loved me - I made him swear you meant nothing to him… Nothing…"
Instinctively, Lily raised her hand and slapped Kate forcefully, who staggered back a few steps, surprised.
"Don't. You. Dare -"
Before Lily could finish her sentence, Kate had already regained her balance and was lunging towards her. Her long, pointed nails cut Lily's neck, drawing out blood.
She grimaced in pain when Kate grabbed a handful of hair and pulled it. Lily then slapped her once more - these last few weeks of intense practice with James had really improved her techniques -, and Kate reeled. The impact of one final slap threw her to the ground.
Absolutely furious, the blonde tried to stand one more time.
"You are a witch, you know," a voice from the door said with amusement.
Lily threw James a sideways glance. He was watching the scene with a carefully neutral facial expression, but his eyes betrayed his glee. She then grabbed her wand, and pointed it at Kate, who froze.
"You don't want to start a duel with me, Malshirn," Lily warned, breathing heavily. "You really don't."
"She has a point," James agreed cheekily.
Kate glared at him. Oh, why did he always have to take her side? Knowing fully well that she didn't stand a chance against Lily, she chose to change the subject. "Have you decided yet, Jamie?"
"I have, actually."
Lily was rearranging her appearance with a few charms, healing her gash and tidying her hair. Her gaze locked with James' when she heard his statement, and his content hazel eyes immediately reassured her. She certainly wasn't the one leaving.
"So?"
"You're going to have to leave, Kate."
"But - but you need me here! Carl himself said he wanted me to come! You can't do without me!"
James glanced at Lily, who seemed quite smug, and grinned. Her eyes twinkled with amusement and delight - nothing could please her more right now than watching Kate's humiliation.
He faced Kate once more. Her white-blonde hair was in disarray, and she was still visibly furious with Lily. Merlin, why had he ever switched Lily for her? Of course the girl had her appeal, but she was so utterly shallow!
No, there was no mistaking it this time. He would never choose Kate Malshirn over Lily again. Ever.
"Watch me."
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These fickle, fuddled words confuse me, like, "Will it rain today?"
We waste the hours with talking, talking - these twisted games we're playing
Oh, we're strange allies, with warring hearts, what wild-eyed beast you be
The space between our wicked lies is where we hope to keep safe from the pain
But will I hold you again? But will I hold…?
Dave Matthew's Band, "The Space Between"
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"Look, Kate, the Minister wants you to work elsewhere with two members of this team to plan the political manoeuvres involved in Neveu's visit - one British, one French."
"Two Aurors? I'll -"
"I guess you need to be introduced to the team members, then," James continued, not heeding her interruption.
"Oh, we've already met," Alain said, all of a sudden.
Everyone stared at him, surprised. They had been watching all that was going on between James, Lily, and Kate dazedly. It was weird for one of the spectators to start participating in the confrontation.
"Wha- what?"
Kate turned to Lily, not understanding the latter's confusion. "Alain is my French counterpart. We've been working together for a while. In fact, he's definitely going to have to be one of the team members I'm taking with me."
Lily laughed dryly. "Well, look at that."
"What?"
"One doesn't always get the chance to ruin a girl's life twice…" she muttered, shaking her head. "Alain's my boyfriend, Malshirn."
Kate gaped for a few seconds, and then cackled delightfully. "You have got to be kidding me."
Lily's gaze hardened. She didn't care whether Kate seduced Alain! She just wanted the girl to leave the room, and go somewhere far, far away from James. "Get out, Malshirn. Now."
"Come on, Al," Kate called with a playful smile. "We have a lot of work to do."
Alain stood and walked to her. He didn't quite know the whole story behind Kate's animosity towards Lily, but he had noticed that James hated the girl. And any enemy of James Potter's was Alain's potential best friend.
"I'd also like working with Julia, if you don't mind, Jamie," Kate said. "Please send her over to me when she arrives."
James nodded curtly.
Kate grabbed Alain's hand, making sure his girlfriend noticed it, and yanked him towards the door.
As soon as they left the room, James glanced at Lily, grinning broadly.
"Was I supposed to care about that?" she asked, smirking. "Like, at all?"
He chuckled.
"So, Lil," Sirius piped up with a smile, "how does it feel?"
"What?"
"Come on - you've been waiting for six years to slap Kate Malshirn like that!"
"Oh, that," she replied, chuckling. "Yeah… That was awesome."
James was staring at Lily in a way that she found quite disturbing. Their gazes locked for a few seconds, but she was forced to look away - it wasn't hard to guess what he was thinking.
Why was he still able to throw her off balance, even after all these years? It made no sense. And why couldn't he stop thinking about… inappropriate activities while they were at work?
"So," she said suddenly, looking at everyone. "Shall we start?"
"Yeah, Lil, sure… We're just waiting for you to tell us what to do."
She frowned. "Right. Okay. We'll just -"
"There's someone coming," Sirius interrupted, pointing at the door.
Lily threw him an exasperate look. That acute hearing of his was a nuisance sometimes. They'd never get anything done if these interruptions continued!
To Lily's utter frustration, Alain entered the room seconds later.
"Kate had to go to London," he muttered to no one in particular, sitting at his previous place.
"Okay," Lily continued, slightly aggravated. "So, like I said, we're working in pairs. There's this big list here, and each pair will choose five or six items. Let me see - Remus, go ahead, work with Sylvie. Sirius and Katrina… Marlene, you're with Dominic… Amelia and Val… Dorcas and Alain… And that's it. When Julia and Will arrive, they'll be together."
Dorcas… oh no. Lily had to be kidding.
The hippie-wannabe chick smiled brightly and sat beside Alain.
"What about you?" he snapped at Lily, glowering.
Lily didn't even bother glaring at him or appearing upset. "I work with James," she replied calmly, putting the list on top of the table. "Go ahead, everyone. Choose your items and start working."
Val glanced at the parchment and gasped. "This is too much! How many days will we-?"
"Days?" James intervened with a smile. "No, Val. Hours. And we intend on leaving as soon as possible - possibly around three PM."
"It's impossible! Plus, even if each pair takes six items, there will still be dozens -"
"We'll manage," Lily replied at once.
Amelia threw Valerie a look. "You've always said that you wanted to work with Lily and James… Well, this is what it's like."
"Yup," Dorcas agreed, giving Alain a funny look. "Work is all we do in that office."
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(Do you know? Everybody knows now…)
Some girls are all about it; some girls, they love to let it fly
Some girls can't live without it; some girls are born to make you cry (…)
They get you climbing the walls, they get you caught in their spell
They get you speaking in tongues - could this be heaven or hell?
To fall in love twice a day is such a sweet place to be, s'il vous plaît…
Aerosmith, "Girls Of Summer"
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All the insinuating jokes were starting to annoy Lily. Oh, come on, was it really so blatant? For goodness' sake, she hadn't slept with James in years! So what if one could cut the sexual tension with a knife? So what if he was all she could think about? So what if it didn't take more than a look or a brief touch to send shivers down her spine?
It wasn't fair, what her teammates were doing to Lily and James! Alain was getting suspicious - not that she cared much about that fact, but whatever -, and Julia certainly would notice something was going on as soon as she arrived.
Oh, of course they'd only really noticed how bad the situation was during the party the previous night. After a few drinks, James had been visibly eager to get rid of Julia. Everyone noticed that the situation had amused Lily; she had enjoyed taunting him, and had remained there with friends after his departure, much to his disappointment.
"What the hell is happening, Lily?" Alain growled in Deutsch, glaring at James. "What is it with you and this guy?"
Her Deutsch was not very fluent, and Alain knew that. But it was the only language that no one in the room knew… And he didn't want to be even more humiliated by making a scene.
But, right now, Lily did not want to speak secretively to him.
"We'll talk later," she coldly replied in English.
James threw her a look, and she smiled.
'Oh… Mr. Boring is jealous! Poor thing…'
Lily bit her lower lip to suppress a giggle. She was perfectly aware of James's opinion of Alain: an incompetent fool who should have known better than to date a girl so obviously out of his league.
Obviously, he was of the opinion that Lily was way out of every guy's league… Except for James Potter himself, of course.
For a few moments, the only noises in the room were of quills scratching parchment. Everybody seemed to be waiting for someone to break the silence. Lily and James were looking into each other's eyes with playful grins, each daring the other to make the first move.
She kept messing with her hair, twirling it idly. He amused himself by sending short but unmistakeable wordless messages to her. It wasn't hard: all it took was a significant glance or a half-gesture.
It was becoming increasingly hard for Lily not to burst out laughing. There was a delighted twinkle in her eyes, and James was beginning to wonder why on earth they had agreed to work in France for a day. If they had been in the office, she wouldn't have resisted his advances.
Sylvie leaned closer to Remus. "Why don't they bother pretending nothing's happening?" she whispered.
He grinned. "Do you really think they care about what other people think? James has found his match - and the chase is really all that matters to him now."
"It's odd."
Remus nodded. "Well, they've always been odd."
"I think -"
Sylvie abruptly stopped talking.
Lily and James had suddenly begun acting all business-like; they had quickly conjured a 3D map of Godric's Hollow beside the table and were standing next to it. They then started discussing, and shooting coloured lights at the scenario every few seconds with spells.
As usual, it didn't take them long to start arguing again.
Lily folded her arms over her chest and glared at James. "No! I'm positive -"
He snorted. Normally - if anyone but Lily had said that sentence, that is -, he would have been able to keep his cool. But not around her.
His behaviour changed completely whenever they were together. He couldn't help but make a scene, all the while wanting to snog her senseless. Oh, why did she always bring out the teenager in him with such ease?
And why wouldn't she leave his mind, no matter what he did?
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A faire l'amour sur des malentendus
On vit toujours des moments defendus, c'est comme ça
Tellement si femme quand elle mord
Tellement si femme, je l'aime tellement si fort
Elle a les yeux revolver; elle a le regard qui tue
Elle a tiré la première; elle m'a touché, c'est foutu
Son corps s'achève sous des draps inconnus
Et moi, je rêve des gestes defendus, c'est comme ça…
Marc Lavoine, "Yeux Revolver"
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"If we -"
"No, it's -"
"Obviously, they -"
"Absolutely! It's -"
"Nah, we -"
"I just -"
"He will -"
"No, he -"
"But of course -"
"Yes! Jeez, we -"
"No! It's -"
"I could kiss you right now," James said under his breath, staring at her with a broad grin. "Just how necessary is our presence here anyway?"
"We have a lot of work…" Lily muttered, smirking naughtily.
"We can handle it."
"Not if we -"
"No matter what, we can."
She frowned. "No. We can't."
"Of course we can, and you know it."
"No!"
"Yes!"
"No!"
"Yes!"
"You guys are really annoying!" Remus exclaimed. "Merlin! Please, enough with the yelling!"
James glanced at Moony, and then at Lily. There was really only one thing to do. Swishing his wand, he created a solid, soundproof barrier between the table and their workspace.
Lily laughed. "You're insane."
"Uh-huh," he agreed with a grin. "Now -"
"If you think I'm going to do anything -"
"Now, why on earth would I think that?"
"My boyfriend's twenty feet away."
"I think you care about that as much as I do - that is, not at all."
"But - work - we -"
"Work schmurk," he replied, looking at her with avid eyes. In his one-tracked mind, he could probably already see Lily expectantly lying on his bed, undressed and covered from head to toe in honey. They had used to do that kind of thing frequently while still at Hogwarts, but not so much these days anymore.
"James, come on… Stop…"
"Or else…?"
She grinned devilishly. "Or else… you're not getting any for a month."
He snorted. "Right."
Well, his incredulity hadn't been unexpected. They both knew that it would be impossible to continue living like this. The tension would have to be released eventually…
Just not like this, Lily thought forlornly. Not like this…
"I might as well," she said all of a sudden, "make a potion in order to help me keep the promise."
James grimaced.
"Or," she added with an evil cackle and a raised eyebrow, "I should give you a potion! You know - if things don't work properly, you'll stop bugging me."
He looked positively horrified. "Oh, no! No, no…"
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What's taking you so long?
I'm getting extra impatient waiting for you to tell a nigga to move on (…)
Bend over, you know how we do it, feet to shoulders
Bring heat to coldest night, so ferocious (…) loving the way you be moaning
Gripping the sheets, looking at me, licking at me, and it's crazy
But baby, I love it when I'm with you…
Ashanti & Ja Rule, "Mesmerize"
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"That would be incredibly unfair!"
"Why is that?"
"You're a very, very attractive girl," he said, lightly brushing his fingers against her neck. "You can't really blame a guy for trying."
"James…"
He walked a step closer. Lily could now feel his breath on her neck, the warmth of his arms enveloping her, his voice ticking her ear… "Yes?"
Oh, crap. A small part of her still felt detached enough to acknowledge the mushiness overwhelming her brain, the heat sweeping through her like waves of passion and yearning… And now here she was, yet again, losing control of her actions, once more allowing him to -
"Do you want me to go?" James teased, pulling her to him and brushing his lips against her neck and cheek. "If you want me to stop, just say the word…."
"I - Merlin - James…"
"What is it, you're worried about work? Do you think that ten minutes will make that much of a difference?"
"The others -"
"They won't get through the barrier, I promise."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes, I'm sure," he replied at once, kissing her. Sliding his hand up her thigh, he firmly held her close. James could feel her giving in, as usual - she was beginning to surrender to her instincts, to the unexplainably consuming sensations only he could inspire…
Well, of course he understood it - he felt the same thing.
After a few seconds, much to his annoyance, Lily started shifting uncomfortably, until she pushed him away altogether.
"No," she muttered, soberly looking into his eyes. "Not now, James. We have a lot of work to do."
"Just -"
"No," Lily repeated. Oh, she had that inflexible no-nonsense look on her face - it was useless to oppose her now.
Damn.
"All right," James acquiesced with a sigh.
He groaned inwardly. Why did he have to want her this badly? Why her, why the only girl who was able to resist him? It wasn't fair!
She knelt on the floor and gestured for him to follow suit. James stubbornly remained standing, sulking.
Lily laughed. "Aw," she cooed. "Don't be childish. Come on…"
He sat beside her grudgingly and crossly glared at the floor.
Lily made her way to James with a coy smile and sat on his lap, facing him and wrapping her legs around his waist.
"Lil…" he groaned. "Please make up your mind…"
"You looked so crestfallen," she whispered, nibbling on his ear. "I couldn't possibly -"
James shut her up with a kiss and pushed her back a little with his torso, noticing with a smile that she was trying her best to conceal her delight. He didn't know whom her feeble act of resistance was meant to convince, but it wasn't working for either of them.
"Oh, hi, Julia!" Sirius' voice, strident and unnaturally cheery, came from the other side of the barrier and startled the couple.
"Julia's here," Lily snapped forcefully, snatching James' hand from underneath her blouse.
"Never mind her," he replied, playfully licking her neck. "I'll dump her soon enough anyway…"
Lily threw her head back a little to allow him better access, but her hands tried to stop him from touching her. "James…"
"Just - five minutes…"
"Hmm…"
She was almost giving in once more when Sirius' voice interrupted them again. "They're over there," he was practically yelling. "Right behind the sound barrier - you know what that's like, they kept fighting and some of us were trying to work."
"Shit - James!"
"All right, all right!" he snarled, defensively raising his arms. Man, he really hated Julia right now…
Lily frowned and fixed both of their appearances with some charms. She was getting really good at that… Soon she would be able to do it in about five seconds.
James lay down with a sigh and stared at the ceiling.
"Sit up, come on."
"Sirius is the one who's coming, not her."
"So?"
"Do you really think he believes we've been working all along?"
Lily gave him a look.
"I'm just saying!"
"But still!"
Right then, Sirius knocked, and James allowed him to enter.
"Sorry," he began with a half-smile. "I was just trying to forewarn you guys."
"Yeah, we know. Thanks, Padfoot."
"Julia's waiting for instructions outside."
"I'll be right out. Thanks."
"You're welcome."
Sirius turned and left. Lily glanced at James; he'd been attentively watching her all along.
"We're pathetic," she breathed out, frustrated.
"Yes, we are," he agreed, standing and offering her a hand. "But then again, we've always been."
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It's not her fault that she's so irresistible
But all the damage she's caused isn't fixable (…)
In front of your eyes, I'm invisible, but you've got to know small things also count
You better put your feet on the ground, and see what it's about
Objection! I don't want to be the exception to get a bit of your attention
I love you for free and I'm not your mother, but you don't even bother
Objection! I'm tired of this triangle…
Shakira, "Objection"
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Julia grinned when James finally came through the barrier, looking preoccupied and slightly nervous. Oh, never mind the fact that he barely glanced at her… His very presence made her feel all warm inside.
He always made life seem a lot better - he always brightened her day. Even after all this time, she couldn't help but feel a rush of tenderness every time he smiled, every time he held her hand… James made her feel safe, and loved.
"Hey, Jules," he greeted. Was he tired? His voice sounded weary…
James leaned to kiss her, and she heaved an inward sigh. Now, he was actually a pretty good kisser, but Julia didn't really enjoy it all that much. He was way too… intense sometimes. He didn't seem capable of a simple peck, or a chaste kiss on the cheek. Everything was always so extreme!
Julia didn't really understand why he was like that, but, as usual, she pulled back after five seconds, before they could technically start snogging. James wasn't surprised - she did that all the time -, but she could sense his frustration.
Well, what did he expect? They were surrounded by tons of people! She couldn't just let him kiss her like that in front of everyone!
Both James and Julia's gazes focused on Lily, who was only now coming out of the secluded portion of the room.
"Hello," Julia said cheerfully.
"Hey!" Lily replied with a bright smile.
James instantly guessed that she was furious and incredibly annoyed. See, to turn him down by sheer will power was one thing; to be interrupted by his galling girlfriend was another altogether. The occurrence of the latter had forced them to stop way too abruptly, much to their aggravation.
James knew that right now Lily was blaming herself for not giving in to him earlier. After all, they would have had time to do quite a bit more if she had done that… Oh, everyone probably believed that her smile was genuine - well, maybe not Sirius -, but she would never fool him.
"Jules, you remember Sylvie…" Lily began, gesturing towards the table. "That's her brother, Dominic… You've met Alain, right? Yeah, and that's Katrina."
Julia smiled warmly at each one, and they nodded hello. Alain stared at her. He vaguely remembered this beautiful woman - unless he was very much mistaken, she had visited Lily in France a long time ago.
"You can - pick a pair to join for now," Lily continued. "Will's arriving soon, and then you'll work with him."
"Who's that?"
"He's an English Auror who works here in Paris."
"All right, nice."
A polite cough made them all turn to look at the door.
The short witch wearing thick, gold-framed spectacles standing there laughed nervously. Her long nails lightly ran across the doorway, producing an annoying high-pitched sound.
Most people in the room knew her, and scowled. Few Ministry workers liked the Daily Prophet reporters, and least of all Rita Skeeter.
"May I help you?" James asked after a few seconds.
"Yes. I'm looking for… Mr. and Mrs. Potter."
He blankly stared at her for a few seconds. What the hell -?
"I'm James Potter," he replied, knowing fully well that she was aware of that. "But I'm not married."
Both Julia and Lily were staring at him, obviously puzzled. Everyone else was looking at Skeeter, waiting for clarification.
She laughed. "Well now, Mr. Potter, don't worry. The cat's out of the bag. You and your wife won the Most Attractive Auror contest."
James' stomach gave an unpleasant jolt. Something was terribly wrong. "I - I'm not married," he repeated weakly. Rita Skeeter could cause him a huge amount of trouble if she decided to spread this silliness around the Ministry…
Lily glanced at Sirius; he looked horribly guilty. She began getting a really bad feeling. Skeeter wasn't saying this lightly… Oh, what had Black done this time?
"Oh, but you are. Everyone knows it now - it's useless to keep on pretending. See, I have a copy of your marriage certificate right here - you married Miss Lily Evans on February 14, 1972, in the village of Hogsmeade."
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