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Hopelessly Addicted
Chapter 4
"Humdrum"
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I wanna take you for granted, drift while you're talking
Bathe while you're downstairs, and chat on the phone
Fall asleep before bedtime, pass in the hallway
Forget your birthday, and shrink all your clothes…
The Corrs, "Humdrum"
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The Death Eaters had recently started kidnapping wizards and exchanging their freedom for that of Azkaban prisoners. Naturally, the Ministry didn't like negotiating with dark wizards, and the Aurors always tried to rescue the hostages before both parties had reached a compromise.
As time went by, Voldemort's followers got more and more sophisticated. They now had mansions equipped with cells and torture chambers, and more informants inside Ministry ranks than ever.
The Dark Lord's strategies were driving the Aurors crazy. He had them searching for hostages in Belfast when they were actually in Bristol; he made them rush to protect a Muggle family living in London when in truth his next kill was planned in Scotland…
Nevertheless, they still managed to get most of the work done, and maintained a decent success ratio. When they failed, however, the press immediately hurried to condemn the Ministry and criticize the Aurors.
The main reasons for their success (despite Voldemort's tactics) were the existence of a few informers amid the Death Eaters and the continued activity of strategists like Lily Evans. Intel on the Dark Lord's plans was always abundant, confusing, and often misleading; it was her job to work with every possible scenario, coming up with several approaches to each situation. She had to try to minimise the surprises Aurors encountered on the field.
Her work was absolutely vital. Lily knew that very well, and took it seriously. In fact, one might even call her a workaholic.
So there she was, at ten-thirty on a sunny Saturday morning, sitting at her desk, working at home. She'd been at it since six o'clock, and was far from done.
In truth, she was a perfectionist. She certainly wouldn't finish all the things she had to do, for she intended on using all the time available until Monday to perfect her strategies.
"Lil?"
And there he was… again. Why did Alain keep interrupting her? Couldn't he see that she was busy? He'd woken up less than an hour ago, and had already disturbed her several times.
Lily didn't even bother to look at him. "Yes?"
Alain ignored the unmistakeable exasperation in her tone and silently wondered why she'd taken to speaking English at home recently. Many things were changing about Lily, and he was quite sure he disliked them all.
"You haven't eaten anything."
"I'm all right."
"Come on, you need to take a break."
She sighed impatiently and finally looked up at him. "I have a lot of work to do, Alain. Close the door when you leave, please."
He nodded and did as she'd asked.
After a few seconds, Lily stared at the closed door. What was going on? Their relationship had begun going downhill from the moment she'd started working in London.
She had very little patience to deal with him now - even less than she had had in the past two years. Back when she was still working in France, she had been much more caring and serene around Alain… But then again, she had used to cheat on him all the time. Now she was so busy that she couldn't even spent time at home with him, let alone maintain an affair.
Nevertheless, she still managed to find time to argue with James.
James… Oh, Merlin - how come she couldn't even spend a weekend without thinking about that guy? Anyway, he was annoying as hell most of the time, but at least he never bothered her when she was working.
Whereas Alain seemed to do it on purpose sometimes. Okay, Lily knew that she was working all the time, so the only way he could ever talk to her was if he interrupted her work. Lily cared about him, she really did. But she was just a bit impatient these days.
Alain was no romantic; in truth, he was really pragmatic most of the time. But the truth was that he was in love with her. Lily knew what that felt like, even though she wasn't in love with him. He just wanted to be with her. Their sex life, or lack thereof, wouldn't disturb him as much if she just gave him some more attention.
The fact that there seemed to be no space for him in her new life was probably hurting him more than her constant snapping. Poor lovesick schmuck…
There really was no space for him in her new life. And Lily knew that this fact should have been bothering her, but, strangely enough, it wasn't.
Lily was starting to realise she not only didn't love Alain, but also didn't care for him at all.
"What am I doing with this guy?" she muttered.
She shook her head and focused back on her work.
It was a typical Lily response: dutifully pushing those thoughts away for later consideration and returning to her previous occupation. She had more important things to think about - analysing their relationship would have to wait.
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It's all right to make mistakes; you're only human
Inside, everybody's hiding something
Take time to catch your breath and choose your moment
Don't slide…
Dido, "Slide"
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The French Minister of Magic was going to visit England next week. That was all anyone was allowed to know: no specific location or date had been released.
It seemed that the French Ministry was finally learning how to keep a secret, an art its British counterpart had mastered ages ago. Great! Superb! Wonderful! Conceal the Minister's location from everyone, and only announce it when he was about to leave… It was really the best thing to do. Except that… it didn't really make sense to conceal the location from Lily. Not from the one person who had to come up with the security scheme that would protect Jacques Neveu from any incidents.
Oh, it was aggravating her to no end. How the hell was she supposed to position the security for the Minister's visit if she didn't know when he was arriving or where he was going? Lily was used to working in the dark every once in a while, but this was too much! She'd already proved her loyalty countless times - there was no need to withhold those details from her!
Suddenly, an owl flew in. Lily recognised him instantly.
"Hey, Kayk."
He dropped a rather large envelope on her desk, nipped the tip of her finger affectionately, and flew away.
Before opening the package, Lily noticed that there was something written on the outside - unsurprisingly, it was James' handwriting.
'You know, despite the fact that it's a beautiful Saturday afternoon, I'd be willing to bet my Cloak that you'll be surrounded by mission scenarios when you receive this package. Either that or you'll be in the middle of a tantrum because you haven't received the proper directives regarding Neveu's visit next week. The latter's more likely. Or maybe both. Well, guess what? Christmas came a little early this year.'
Lily grinned slightly, and opened the envelope. One quick glance at its contents was enough to improve her mood significantly.
It was all there: the Minister's arrangements, details on his staff, their requests to the security teams… Lily didn't know how James had managed to get access to all this, but she didn't care. He had just made her work a hell of a lot easier.
Well, it was common courtesy: she would have to write him a thank-you note. And, of course, while she was at it, she was going to ask him his opinion on a scenario or two.
After all, James knew Lily very well, but it was reciprocated. She was absolutely certain he was also working… 'despite the fact that it was a beautiful Saturday afternoon.'
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Every twenty seconds you repeat her name
But when it comes to me, you don't care if I'm alive or dead
So, objection! I don't want to be the exception to get a bit of your attention
I love you for free and I'm not your mother
But you don't even bother…
Shakira, "Objection"
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"If we enter - no, but then they'll… Yeah. Actually, what would happen if we did… that?" James muttered to himself, using his wand to alter a 3-D rotating scenario. He motioned for the tiny transparent people to enter the building through a secluded passageway and the first few were blown to pieces. He hastily got the rest of the team out of there. "Oh, no, that's definitely bad."
His eyes darted quickly to Julia. She had been sitting not too far away for almost two hours, apparently waiting for him to notice her presence.
"Is something wrong, Jules?" he asked for the tenth time, already knowing the answer.
"No, everything's all right."
He shook his head slightly and focused on the scenario again. Well, if she didn't want to say it, he sure didn't want to push her.
In truth, James knew perfectly well what was bothering her, for it was bothering him as well. They had a problem in their relationship. Things just weren't the same anymore. Something was going on, driving them away from each other. Julia didn't know what it was, but James did. To be more precise, it wasn't a thing… it was a person. A woman.
Namely, Lily Evans.
To put it mildly, James couldn't stop thinking about her. And not in a good, romantic, nostalgic way - oh, no! Her image showed up in his mind's eye at the most… inappropriate times.
He was quite sure Julia didn't know that, whenever he was in bed with her, all he could think of was Lily. The poor girl definitely didn't deserve it - Julia had always been sweet; she'd never done anything wrong. But what could he do?
Even arguing with Lily got him aroused, for goodness' sake! The fact that she was the only girl who had ever opposed him systematically, with sharp logic and keen arguments, only worsened the problem. Of course, her brains weren't what made her so appealing. They were only a small piece of the puzzle.
See, James Potter had a selective memory. He usually identified his acquaintances by their talents - Quidditch or work related. He effortlessly managed to remember details about a mission that'd happened months ago; it was equally as easy to come up with Quidditch tactics or statistics.
Now, girls… Girls were a problem. Of course James still remembered most of their names and all, but he just couldn't manage to recall many details about a one-night stand. Unless the night in question had been an incredible, exceptional one, he wasn't able to evoke its events.
And he remembered every single time he'd slept with Lily.
Every. Single. Time.
How could he have forgotten? She was, beyond any doubt, the best he'd ever had. Even now, six years since the last time they'd slept together, the memories were vivid enough to send a pleasant shiver down his spine.
"James?"
Startled, he looked at Julia. She was now standing, looking at him with a puzzled expression.
"You spaced out."
"I was thinking - I - I have to - Lily sent me a -" he stuttered.
'Damn it, James Potter, control yourself.'
Julia shook her head and started walking to him. "Lily hates you, James," she said with a raised eyebrow, as if she knew what he'd been thinking about.
He groaned inwardly. 'Don't remind me.'
Well, of course Julia didn't know about his latest fantasies - James didn't know what her point was going to be, but it certainly had nothing to do with those.
"But I don't," Julia continued softly, sitting on his lap. "Come on… Work can wait a bit."
He gave in and kissed her.
Well, at least if he indulged Julia and eventually cuddled until she fell asleep, he would have some time to work without interruptions. That is, except for Lily's occasional letters with suggestions about the scenarios he was working on and questions about hers.
James sure as hell didn't mind when she interrupted his work.
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I see you in my memory, as vivid as today
And I wonder, do you see me in that same, familiar way?
Oh, another place, another time, we'll meet again and you'll be mine
Oh, 'cause nothing can compare to you and I…
Wasn't it true? Do you remember like I do?
The Corrs, "Remember"
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'You know, James, maybe we should rent a house, and have all the meetings there. It'll be more expedient to secure one single space than to have a team moving around with Neveu all day long.'
'That's a good idea. But do you reckon we can secure a house that much? If the Minister stays in the same place for a long time, the Death Eaters will have more time to try and get in.'
'That's true, but I don't think it's worth the hassle. We're going to have to plan a different security scheme for each of the places he visits… It's too much!'
'Did you spill ink on Kayk's left wing?'
'Yeah, sorry. I've just cleaned it.'
'I'm just not sure whether or not it's worth it. It's true; we shouldn't waste our group's time if there's any other way.'
'I think so too. Yeah, we should look for a house.'
'We're going to have to rent it for at least two months, or else the owner might get suspicious.'
'Good thinking.'
'Where, though?'
'I don't know… Any ideas? Can you look for it personally?'
'What, do you think I have nothing better to do on a Saturday afternoon than look for a house for the French Minister?'
'That is precisely what I think.'
'Oh, whatever. All right, I'm going to take a look and then I'll get back to you.'
'Good luck. And no diversions in the meantime, Mr. Potter.'
'I take it you're too busy to consider indulging in said diversions, then, Miss Evans. It's a pity. Oh, I think I found a place; do you want to check it out with me? The ad says it's more or less secluded and very spacious. There's a picture with it; the house looks really nice.'
'Send me the address; I'll meet you there. And about that other thing… even if I weren't busy, darling, and you were the last man on earth, it still wouldn't happen. Not a chance. Don't get your hopes up.'
When James read Lily's last reply, he couldn't help but to laugh.
Quite oddly, the prospect of spending the rest of the day alone with Lily pleased him immensely. Oh, of course she'd rebuffed his little joke, but who was she kidding? She was obviously in denial; of course she was attracted to him. How could she not be? James highly doubted that boyfriend of hers, whatever his name was, had managed to make her forget their Hogwarts days.
The way James saw it, he and Lily were on a break. After all, she had promised she'd come back to him. What kind of a break-up was that?
And now she was back… Okay, so he didn't love her anymore - so what? It wasn't like he loved Julia. Or any of the other girls he'd dated since Lily, for that matter. Love was a very rare thing, and they'd let it wane… All they could hope for now in a good relationship was companionship, attraction, and mutual understanding.
Besides, they looked great together; everybody thought so. Yeah… They would get back together soon, James was sure of it.
It was just a matter of time.
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Wasn't it true? Do you remember like I do?
Wasn't it true or is it all tainted in your view?
Could I be just a dream or two away from you?
Do you remember? Oh, I remember…
The Corrs, "Remember"
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"Oh, this is nice. This is very, very nice."
James stared at the surroundings and nodded. "Yeah. Can you believe it? Godric's Hollow - the place where the Snitch was invented…"
She threw him a look. "I've read Quidditch Through The Ages as many times as you have, James. Please."
He grinned. "I'm just saying…"
Lily shook her head, smiling.
The house in front of them looked like something straight out of her dreams. It was absolutely perfect, down to that cute little squirrel carrying a nut by the tree.
"It's perfect," she breathed out.
"Should we go talk to the lady?"
"Yeah, sure."
They walked to the front door and knocked. After a few seconds, a short, friendly lady opened it.
"Hello."
"Hello, ma'am. I'm Lily -"
"And I'm James Potter," he intervened smoothly.
"I'm Mrs. Baker," she replied, smiling and shaking his outstretched hand. "You're married?"
"No," answered Lily at once, irked.
"Actually, we were just passing by -" began James with a smile. He then froze for a few seconds; they hadn't prepared an excuse for their presence.
"In truth, we're getting married," continued Lily. "We were looking for a house around here. And then we saw that little sign saying it's for sale… Well, we were wondering if we could take a look."
The lady seemed startled, and didn't even stop to remember that there was no sign saying the house was for sale. "You were just… passing by?"
James understood why she was worried; she thought they were Muggles. But they couldn't tell her otherwise right there, in broad daylight. "May we come in, ma'am?"
"Oh, of course. Please."
They entered, and Mrs. Baker closed the door. All of a sudden, a loud, ominous groan came from upstairs, followed by a loud crash.
"Well," she said, choosing her words carefully. "This house is a bit strange sometimes, so -"
"You have a ghoul?" Lily piped up with interest.
Mrs. Baker was startled. "You're a witch?"
"Yes, of course," she replied. "We saw your ad in the Daily Prophet. But we couldn't tell you that in the middle of the street…"
The old lady laughed with relief. "Oh, wonderful. How could I explain to a Muggle that I have a depressed, homesick ghoul living in my attic?"
They laughed.
"Can we take a look around, Mrs. Baker?"
"Please, go ahead."
"Well, excuse us, then."
Lily and James observed the house with interest; it didn't take them long to conclude that the interior was just as perfect as the exterior. The two floors would be easily secured with a simple plan, and controlling the entrance would be a piece of cake.
"I could get used to living here in a hurry," muttered Lily, observing the view from the veranda. "This house is beautiful."
"Well, you stay there and enjoy the view. I'm going to talk to Mrs. Baker about the payments."
"All right."
James descended the stairs, and found Mrs. Baker in the kitchen, making tea. She offered him some, and they sat.
"We were thinking of renting the house for a couple of months."
She nodded. "I moved here recently, but my ghoul misses our old manor. I'm going to return, and I'm trying to sell this house."
"I'm not sure -"
"No, you can rent it. I'll sell it later, no problem. I liked the two of you - you make a lovely couple."
He grinned.
"What do you do for a living?"
"We work in the Ministry."
"Together?"
"Yes."
"My late husband used to work in the Ministry…" said Mrs. Baker fondly, "Oh, that's very nice. Well, what do you say to six hundred galleons?"
"It's a fair price."
"Wonderful, then. It will only take me a few hours to move out. You can come tomorrow morning, if you want."
"Perfect. Well, we should be going. We have a lot of packing to do."
They shook hands, and James went to the staircase.
"Sweetheart!" he called with a smile. James knew very well what Lily's reaction to that would have been if they weren't in this situation.
Lily came down immediately.
"You know," said Mrs. Baker giddily, "if you're thinking of having children, this house is wonderful. There's a big garden where they can play, spacious rooms…"
"It's a wonderful house, Mrs. Baker. Thank you very much - for everything. We'll send you an owl to wrap up the final details."
"Of course. It was my pleasure."
They Apparated to the office. James got his key while Lily ticked the orange. Once they were inside, she threw him a look.
"'Sweetheart'?" she spat.
James shrugged. "You were the one who came up with this whole we're-getting-married scenario, my dear. I just played along."
"How much?"
"Six hundred."
"It's fair. Two months?"
He sighed. "Yes. A worthy addition to our growing budget. You know, if we actually depended on the Ministry to pay for all of this, we'd never get anything done."
"I doubt any of the other Chief Aurors invest this much in their teams. How do they manage? Well, I'll give you my six hundred on Monday - I just have to stop by Gringotts."
"All right."
"I put some surveillance items inside some rooms, and I got the blueprint to the house. It's a strategist's dream come true."
"Good. I reckon Mrs. Baker is trustworthy. I had a Sneakoscope in my pocket, and it apparently didn't find any faults," he said, getting it out and showing it to her.
Lily spun it around idly, observing it with interest. "It's nice. But what would you have done if it had started buzzing?"
"Apparated away."
"You should've told me you were bringing this."
"You would've caught the hint and left, too."
She nodded.
"Well," he said, standing. "I should go, then."
Lily ran a hand through her hair. "Yeah, me too. I'll send you a copy of the blueprints… Oh, James, I actually wanted to ask you - How do you manage to work at home?"
He looked at her, surprised. "What do you mean? You work at home all the time…"
"Well, yeah, but Alain keeps interrupting me. Doesn't Julia get annoyed?"
"She not really that type of girl. She doesn't complain, but of course she gets annoyed. I don't get that much work done on the weekends - the other Marauders don't let me, either."
"Yeah, I thought so."
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I have daydreams of another, so romantic you'll discover…
I wanna take you for granted, drift while you're talking
Bathe while you're downstairs, shrink all your clothes
Fall asleep before bedtime…
The Corrs, "Humdrum"
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Lily sat at her desk and stared at the stack of parchment for a long time. She didn't feel like working, for the first time in a while. She loved being an Auror, no doubt about it, but now she had some thinking to do.
James had given the game away. All right, it had only been one little, tiny, harmless joke… But Lily knew better. Well, maybe she was reading too much into it - oh, of course she wasn't!
Unless she was very much mistaken - and that was hardly ever the case with anything regarding him -, James was now determined to get into her pants. He seemed willing to ignore the existence of both Alain and Julia; Lily just had to make the first move, and he would take care of the rest.
She knew him too well to believe he was faithful to his girlfriend. Without a doubt, he occasionally had his adventures; like Lily, James needed the excitement. Besides, after that long - he and Julia had been together for almost a year now -, their sex life was certainly slowing down.
Would Lily be willing to do this? Was it worth it?
She smiled. She remembered her time with James very well; it was undeniably worth... anything.
But the truth was that, if she gave in, there would be no turning back. They were going to hit it off right away… what then? They worked together, for goodness' sake! And they worked too well together to risk it…
Of course, her life would be much easier if they got back together. They'd argue less, for one. And -
Suddenly, Lily realised she was actually seriously considering reconciliation. No, no, no! She couldn't! She wouldn't let him use her like that again! This was too abrupt! Where had all these thoughts come from, this quickly? Had she been mulling over this subconsciously for a while?
Oh, that was likely. James had a way of messing with her mind… Was this why she kept putting off Alain?
Lily groaned. Yes, exactly. The thought of sleeping with Alain was repulsive now that she'd started fantasising about James. Oh, Merlin…
She tried to remind herself that James flirted with any cute girl who crossed his path; it was an instinct, as natural as breathing. He had just done it to see her reaction; he didn't have any real interest in her… Or did he?
Trying to figure out the inner workings of James Potter's mind was a rather time-consuming, tiring exercise, and Lily wasn't up for it right now. She needed some rest, and then she'd be able to get back to her work. No more thinking of him tonight; distractions were the last thing she needed. There was too much to be done…
Her mind wandered once more, and she found herself reviewing what he'd written in that note: 'I take it you're too busy to indulge in said diversions, then, Miss Evans. It's a pity.'
Too busy? Apparently not. She was always too busy for Alain, but never for James…
Right then, her boyfriend entered her office without knocking.
Lily looked up at him. Oh, this relationship wouldn't last much longer; the very sight of him already exasperated her now…
"Yes?"
"I'm eating peanut butter sandwiches. Do you want some?"
She shook her head, irritated. She was allergic to peanut butter; didn't Alain know that? "I'm tired, so I'm going to bed now."
He opened his mouth to suggest -
"I kind of have a headache, actually," she hurried to add.
'The lamest euphemism for "I don't want to sleep with you". Merlin, why am I with this guy again?'
"Good night, Alain."
"Good night, dear. Sweet dreams."
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And when I go to sleep at night, I'll thank you for each blessed thing surrounding me
For every fall I'll ever break, each moment's breath I wanna taste
Confidence and conscience, decadent extravagance, never-ending providence
For loving when I had the chance…
The Corrs, "Angel"
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