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Hopelessly Addicted
Chapter 9
"Wicked Game"
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Picture this, me and you doing what we want to do
Imagine, we could do this all day; baby boy, you stay on my mind
Fulfil my fantasies… (Come on, girl, tell me how you feel)
I think about you all the time; I see you in my dreams
(You don't know what you do to me)
Baby boy, not a day goes by without my fantasies…
Beyoncé, "Baby Boy"
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"Hangover cure potion?"
Lily finished emptying the vial, stretched lazily. and smiled at James. Oh, she felt wonderful right now - her headache had vanished, and so had her stomachache. She was almost even hungry… almost. Her Monday was improving significantly.
Marlene always had some excellent hangover cure potion in her stock for emergencies like this. Drinking it always made Lily feel all warm, and for a while all her senses seemed to be heightened. It was a very calming effect, and now she really wanted to close her eyes and appreciate it.
"Yeah," she said with a sigh. "I went out for a drink last night."
"So I've heard."
Lily looked at James curiously. He walked to his desk and loosened his tie a bit. He then opened his suitcase and got a small stack of papers and pieces of parchment, arranging them neatly next to his correspondence pile.
"Amelia told me you two met at the Leaky Cauldron… She said that you suggested she go to Law Enforcement after leaving us."
"I did."
"It will suit her just fine. And, let me guess - are you asking your "friend" Benjy to recommend her to his superiors?"
Lily grinned. "Yes. And, like I told you yesterday, he hates it when people call him that."
"Benjy it is, then. Do you reckon he'll still want to do you any favours? You know, after the fiasco last night and all?"
"What fiasco? You're the only person he really doesn't want to see right now."
"What do you mean? You mean -" James snorted. "He believed I was going out with you? Hadn't you told him otherwise?"
She smiled. "You and I pretend well, I guess."
"I see."
James sat at his desk, and his gaze remained fixed on her. "Did you know he was married?"
"Not really. But it doesn't matter."
"Why not?"
"A relationship that long… things get boring. Married men get really excited with new things, and they're never looking for commitment."
"So… you prefer to cheat on your boyfriend with other people who are already cheating on someone else?"
"Basically, yes."
"So," he said with a boyish grin, "does that mean I have a chance?"
"Why?" Lily asked with a raised eyebrow. "Are things with Julia that boring?"
James shrugged. "We've been together for a year… It's - normal."
"I guess so. When was the last time you cheated on her?"
He snorted, making a face.
"Oh, right. Now you're going to get offended. Come on, James - we both know you do it all the time! You're the most commitment-phobic person I've ever met!"
"It's your fault, you know."
"Ditto."
"You're the most commitment-phobic person I've ever met, Lily."
She grinned. "Yes, that makes sense. Well," she said, trying to focus on the scrolls in front of her. "We should really start working. There's a lot to do."
"Which reminds me - Sirius asked me to fill you in on the MAA."
"MAA?"
"Most Attractive Auror. It's this stupid election we have every year… If you want to stand a chance, you should pay the Ministry Aurors a visit one of these days. You know, show off and leave them all drooling."
"Who won last year?"
"Sirius and Marlene. But it's forbidden for someone to win two years in a row."
"When was the last time you won?"
He smiled. "Guess."
"The year before last?"
"Yes."
"When was the last time anyone besides you and Sirius won?"
"The year before that. Everyone wanted to elect Frank and Alice - they'd just gotten married and all."
"Oh, so the year before last it was you against Sirius? And you won?"
James grinned smugly. "Exactly."
"So this year… Everyone thinks you're going to win. With which girl?"
He hesitated. "Julia, probably. But now you're in the picture, so -"
Lily laughed, and he smirked. "Who are you voting for?" she asked, looking into his eyes.
James shook his head, smiling. "You know the answer to that."
Lily bit her lip. Yes, she knew. Of course he'd vote for her. And she'd vote for him, and they'd probably be elected. 'The golden couple,' just like old times…
In a nervous reflex, she snapped her purse open. She needed to get her mind off these things for a while - she needed to smoke.
James scowled when he saw that she was reaching for a cigarette.
"You're smoking now?"
She shrugged.
"You should really stop that, you know."
"Why?"
"It's such a stupid thing to do! Filling your lungs with smoke - big deal."
"It's comforting," Lily replied, lighting up with a simple smell.
"Do it in the bathroom, at least, Lil," he said, frowning. "I don't need to breathe the pollution."
She shrugged and went to the bathroom.
"Why are you wearing that big coat anyway?" he asked loudly, just as she was passing the threshold. "It's not cold in here."
Lily turned to face him. At first her eyes widened slightly, as if she'd been surprised by his question. Then, a moment later, she was grinning naughtily, making James wonder if that innocent wonder had actually been there or if had been just a figment of his imagination.
In one smooth movement, she removed the big coat and threw it on her desk, taking her time to turn slowly and walk to the bathroom.
James couldn't help but gape. It was that dress, the minuscule black dress he'd asked her to wear… it revealed a lot of cleavage, and everything else as well. He didn't quite know how Lily had the guts to walk around the street in that -
Oh yeah. She didn't have the guts. That's why she was wearing such a huge coat. She probably wouldn't let anyone see her outfit; she had put it on solely for James.
Almost involuntarily, he followed her into the bathroom.
How could he possibly resist a girl like that?
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I never could imagine there were only 10 million ways to love somebody
Can't you see I'm at your feet? Whenever, wherever, we're meant to be together
I'll be there and you'll be near, and that's the deal my dear
There over, here under, you'll never have to wonder
We can always play by ear, and that's the deal, my dear…
Shakira, "Whenever, Wherever"
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Lily was standing in front of the mirror, watching him with a smirk.
"I can't believe you're wearing that," he muttered, staring at her reflection. She looked slightly surreal, her black dress contrasting heavily with her red hair, white skin, and the walls surrounding them… The smoke she breathed out created a strange aura around her face.
"You asked me to do it…"
He grinned. "And you obey me since when?"
"I might argue with you, James," she replied simply, turning to face him. "But I never disobey you. And you know that."
"Get rid of that thing, then," he said immediately, nodding at the cigarette.
Lily laughed. "You are so predictable. All right, I will. But first - here, try it."
He shook his head.
"Sticks and stones, James. I will only quit smoking if you try it."
James sighed and gingerly took her cigarette, taking a drag.
"Now, that wasn't so hard, was it?" she taunted, grinning.
He smiled and blew some smoke in her face.
She closed her eyes, laughing. "I really think you -"
Lily didn't get to finish the sentence. James had put his hand on her neck and was pulling her closer… His lips were on hers, sending shivers down her spine… his tongue touched her lower lip and she immediately let him in, wrapping her arms around his neck…
James pushed her roughly against the bathroom wall. The contact of the cold wall against her bare back made Lily come to her senses. Oh, what was she doing? Hadn't they decided that this wasn't worth the risk?
He was James bloody Potter! Didn't she remember? He just wanted to get in her pants, "love and leave" her… James didn't care about her feelings - not that she had any, of course… He was a bastard, who happened to be dating one of her best friends…
He was just James! James, whom she knew like the back of her hand and truly cared about, to whom she was incredibly attracted… James, her James, who clearly wanted her as much as she did him… Why should she care about whom he was dating? He was hers; he'd always been hers first and foremost, before he had even known Julia existed… James was Lily's, and she would never let him go…
That was all that mattered now.
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It's strange, what desire will make foolish people do (…)
What a wicked game to play, to make me feel this way
What a wicked thing to say, "You've never felt this way"
What a wicked thing to do, to make me dream of you
No, I don't want to fall in love (this world will only break your heart)
No, I don't want to fall in love with you…
Chris Isaak, "Wicked Game"
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"Lily?"
Marlene's distant call made Lily nearly cry out in frustration. Why, why, why did she have to be interrupted now? What could possibly be so important? Merlin…
James heard Marlene's voice as well, and backed off slightly. His forehead rested against Lily's, and the tips of their noses continued touching.
"I can't believe it," he muttered.
Lily kissed him lightly, sliding her hands to rest on his chest. "I should go."
James seemed reluctant to let go of her, but it didn't bother Lily in the slightest. "The office door is locked," he said, his voice barely above a whisper. "But you can go open it, if you want."
Oh, right… He knew perfectly well that there was nowhere she'd rather be; he knew that the interruption had angered her as much as it had him.
Lily sighed and went back to the office. James followed her, and muttered the spell to invalidate the door's soundproof attribute.
"Yeah, Marlene?" Lily asked loudly.
"Sirius is downstairs. He's calling you and James to go to the Ministry," Marlene replied from the stairs, on the other side of the office door. "He's waiting."
James sighed heavily. "Tell him we'll be down in a minute."
"All right."
Marlene's footsteps going down the stairs reached their ears a few seconds later. Lily had always liked Sirius, and the idea of winning this 'Most Attractive Auror' thing seemed really appealing, but right now she wanted nothing more than to tell him to go to hell. And shove that stupid MAA -
"You should change," James stated, looking at her with a smile. "Please don't wear that dress - it's just not fair. No one wants the vote to be unanimous. What's the fun in that?"
Lily laughed. James decided to shower while she chose her outfit.
With a swish of her wand, Lily lengthened her dress. She then transfigured it into a blouse and a skirt, whose colour, fabric, and size she kept switching until the ensemble pleased her. She was still at it when he finished his shower, but it didn't take her too long to make up her mind.
"Better?" she asked.
"There still isn't much of a chance of anyone voting for Julia," he replied pensively, with mock solemnity. "What a pity."
"Well, why don't you vote for her, then?"
James lifted her chin slightly and kissed her softly.
"I would never choose her over you."
She grinned, and they went downstairs together.
The cigarette was forgotten in the bathroom sink. Lily wouldn't need it anymore - there was no more reason for nervousness.
It was only a matter of time.
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You can't know how much I think about you - it's making my head spin
Looking at you, and you are looking at me
And we both know what we want - hmm, so close to giving in…
(…) I'm flying so high, high off the ground when you're around
And I feel your high rocking me inside… It's too much to hide…
Jem, "Flying High"
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"Merlin," Lily said suddenly. "I'm tired."
James looked up, startled to hear her voice. They had been working in silence for hours now, trying their best to get everything done. Jacques Neveu's visit was upon them - Saturday was only two days away -, and Godric's Hollow wasn't fully prepared yet. Most of the work that still needed to be done was strategy, but there were a few practical aspects that also needed attention.
Well, it was little wonder that Lily was tired. It was almost nine p.m., and they'd been working non-stop since six in the morning. James was also pretty tired - the past few days had been extremely stressful. They hadn't even had time to think about -
'Stop, stop, stop! James Harold Potter, don't you dare think about it! Don't get sidetracked!'
In truth, they hadn't really stopped thinking about each other. But at least they had managed to focus on work despite it.
Focused. Right. Their minds rampaged every time that they brushed against each other by accident, and every time that one of them accidentally made a wayward comment... They both knew what they were thinking about - and, after four days of enduring this situation, the strain was downright maddening.
"You want to take a break, Lil? Go home and rest a bit."
She shook her head. "I'm aching all over - I haven't even stood for hours. I just… Ugh, I don't even need to look at the Godric's Hollow's map anymore! I know it by heart."
"So do I," he replied.
"I can't believe I still have all this French stuff to do," she muttered angrily, glowering at the untouched pile of correspondence from Paris. "I hate France, I hate Paris, I hate every single bloody -"
"You should really quit, you know. There's no more reason for you to keep that job. I don't think you mind cutting your ties - there is no way you're leaving us now."
"I know… I will, as soon as possible."
"How about tomorrow?"
Lily frowned, and then realisation dawned on her. "Right… Tomorrow we're going to the French Ministry. I'd forgotten about that. Sure, tomorrow."
"Will I get to meet Mr. Boring?" he asked, grinning. "Will he be there?"
She laughed. "Maybe. It's likely."
"Good. I'm curious."
Lily shook her head, and tried to concentrate back on her work. It was useless; her body was complaining about all the extra work she'd been forced to do in the past few days. Naturally, the excessive amount of fantasizing about James Potter and the tension of being close to him all day long didn't help much…
"Aw," Lily groaned, rubbing her neck with a grimace.
James' gaze was fixed on hers lazily, and he was clearly fighting back a smile.
Of course Lily noticed the corners of his mouth were twitching. "What is it? Why are you -?" she stopped abruptly. "Do I want to know the answer to that question?"
James hesitated, but ended up grinning. "Do you want me to give you a backrub?"
She tilted her head to the side, watching him with narrowed eyes.
"I'm pretty good at that, you know."
Lily laughed. "Oh, I remember. I just doubt the integrity of your intentions."
He stood, grinning.
"James -" she said warningly. "You -"
"Let me just try," he interrupted her smoothly. "You can ask me to stop at any time; I really won't mind."
Lily continued eyeing him with some suspicion, but nodded. Her eyebrows shot up when she saw him locking the door with a simple spell.
"Just a precaution."
She decided that it would be safer to stand. That way, if he tried anything, it would be easier for her to slip away. Of course she wanted nothing more than to give in to him… But they really did have a lot of work, and sex would certainly be dangerous distraction.
"No, Lil, sit down."
"Nah, this can't take too long anyway."
James clearly understood her reasoning - he always did… He smiled and shook his head, walking until he stood directly behind her.
He slowly started stroking her back, and massaging her shoulders. Lily's knees went rubbery, and James sat on her chair, guiding her to sit in his lap. She didn't object.
His thumbs worked their way down her neck, following her spinal column, pressing a bit more. After doing this a few times, he went back to her neck, pressing a few specific spots… James Potter was no fool - he knew exactly what he was doing, he knew exactly which sensations he was causing in Lily's body. After a while, he massaged her shoulders again, pinching her skin slightly. His hands soon returned to her neck.
A low groan escaped Lily's lips, making him lose concentration a bit. She started softening visibly, and leaned her head against James' cheek while he worked on her back once more. Her eyes were closed, her lips were slightly parted - her facial expression was so utterly delicious that it took James all his self-control to refrain himself from kissing her… 'Not yet, James Potter, not yet…'
When Lily sensed his fingers making their way back up, she flipped her hair to the front, in order to grant him better access to her neck. James then couldn't quite hold back - there was something about her bare neck and shoulder that threw him utterly off balance. Or maybe it was just her presence so close to him, so familiar, so touchable…
James bit her neck softly, and his hands slid to her waist. For a split second, he wondered what her reaction was going to be. Lily only leaned her head further back; her mind was a muddle, an incomprehensible jumble of thoughts, desires, and disjointed arguments against -
Oh, but how could she possibly back off now? What kind of argument would it take for them to stop? There was no way she could reason against this overwhelming rush of yearning… And why would she want to fight it anyway?
Lily felt like she was about to cry; she was breathless, dizzy, her head was spinning… She honestly didn't think she was capable of logical thinking…
But who needed logic? Lily had James.
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I'm lost to you now, and there's no amount of reason that could save me
So break me, take me, just let me feel your love again
Feels like being underwater, now that I've let go and lost control (…)
Kiss me once - well, maybe twice… Oh, it never felt so nice…
Jewel, "Break Me"
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A tiny, almost mute part of James' mind kept trying to remind him that it would be hard for them to work properly after sleeping together. Even though they were both professionals, it would be very easy to allow their minds to wander…
But of course James didn't pay any attention to the useless warnings of common sense. Suddenly, Lily turned around, putting her knees on either side of his thighs. She tossed her hair back and looked him in the eye. He leaned forward to kiss her, but she leaned back, away from him.
James frowned, confused. She grinned naughtily, and he groaned. He wasn't in the mood for her games tonight!
"Lily, not now… Please…"
She seemed thoughtful for a few seconds, keeping her torso carefully away from his. James' fingers brushed against her cheek lightly. Almost despite herself, Lily closed her eyes and leaned against his warm hand.
Lily didn't resist when he pulled her closer and kissed her deeply; she didn't object to the touch of his hand underneath her blouse; she didn't complain when he started toying with the upper button of her jeans…
She loosened his tie and quickly unbuttoned his shirt. He impatiently got rid of it; Lily's blouse was soon on the floor as well. She ran her hands through his hair and lifted his chin to kiss him, allowing his hands to caress her.
Suddenly, she leaned back with a playful smile, resting her upper back on the desk, and James groaned. Merlin, the woman wanted to drive him crazy…
James' hands held her back, his warm touch making her feel all tingly and snug - Lily was sure that she was safe here, and he would never let her go… He kissed her belly slowly, painstakingly licking his way up, and she swayed her hips slightly. He groaned, clearly enjoying the friction, and soon got to her bra. He was about to undo it, when -
"Prongs?"
James growled incomprehensibly. No, no, no… Not again…
"I really, really, really feel like killing someone right now," he muttered breathlessly, glaring at the door.
Breathing hard, she sat up and stared at him, completely lost. Remus' footsteps grew alarmingly close, and Lily knew she had to do something - anything. But she didn't want to, she didn't want this moment to end, she didn't want to be interrupted yet again, and spend many sleepless nights wondering, fantasizing, longing for James like never before…
Remus knocked. They had barely moved, his hands carelessly thrown around her waist, hers resting on his shoulders.
"We have to open that door, you know," she mumbled with a slight grin.
"And hex him to oblivion? I think it's safer for Moony if we don't," James replied, also grinning weakly.
"Prongs?" Remus called again. "Are you there?"
"Do you think he'll leave if you don't answer?"
James grinned, and nodded.
"What if it's important?"
He shrugged. "He can send me an owl."
"What if it's urgent?"
James frowned.
Lily sighed, and stood. Wordlessly, she handed James his shirt, and fixed her appearance a bit. There wasn't much she could do: her shirt was wrinkled, her lips were red and swollen, her hair was all messy, and her eyes clearly betrayed her frustration.
Well, that didn't matter - it didn't take a perceptive person to realise what had just happened. And Remus was definitely perceptive enough to know just how aggravated Lily and James were.
James pushed his chair closer to the desk, trying to block Remus' view of his pants. Oh, if Moony didn't come with a truly life-or-death crisis, his life would so be in jeopardy…
Lily threw him an impatient don't-bother-pretending look and opened the door with a spell.
"Hello," Remus greeted, smiling.
The couple threw him very nasty looks. Caught by surprise, he tried to understand what was going on; it didn't take him too long to figure it out, and a grin spread across his face.
"I just came here to remind you," he said innocently, "that Gideon's birthday starts in half an hour. Are you two coming?"
Lily's eyes widened. "Oh my… I had completely forgotten. Thank you, Moony. I have to go get ready. I'll - see you at the party?" she asked James.
"Yes, of course."
Lily left in a hurry. As soon as she left, Remus faced James, grinning. "Prongs -"
"When I'm in the mood, she teases me," he replied, exasperated. "When she's in the mood, I tease her… The first time we're both alone, and willing to do it, you stop us. Really, Moony, thanks."
"You're welcome," Remus retorted immediately. "Why don't you just break up with Julia, James? It'll be much easier -"
"No, okay? You and Sirius don't understand the way Lily's mind works. She's going to freak out if I break up with my girlfriend because of her. That will make Lily think I want commitment, and nothing scares her more than that."
"Can't you just tell her -"
"No, no. I'm going to have to keep dating Julia. Believe me; I would've preferred to pick only Lily… But I'm going to have to share her with that idiotic boyfriend of hers, and so she's going to share me with Jules. Not that I mind it that much, but whatever."
Remus shrugged - all the Marauders knew better than to argue with James when he was being this stubborn. And he was always incredibly stubborn about anything regarding Lily Evans. "All right. I have to go to the French Ministry to pick up something for Dumbledore now."
"I'll see you at the party, then."
"Bye, Prongs. And good luck."
"Thanks."
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That I would be good even when I'm overwhelmed
That I would be loved even when I was fuming
That I would be good even if I was clingy
That I would be good even if I lost sanity
That I would be good whether with or without you…
Alanis Morissette, "That I Would Be Good"
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"How can you two argue so much?"
Lily stopped herself from rolling her eyes. She'd been asked this very same question many times since going to the Ministry on Monday and demonstrating to most of the Aurors what it was like to be caught in the crossfire between James and her.
"We're just incompatible," she replied, cringing inwardly at her own hypocrisy.
Incompatible? Yeah, right. 'Too compatible' was more like it. Lily had never felt that kind of chemistry with anyone else. They weren't just like-minded or attuned; their bodies also moved in perfect synchrony, and -
'Don't, Lily. Not now - this is not the time or the place to think about that.'
Lily successfully pushed the thoughts away, but she couldn't resist glancing at James. It wasn't hard to spot him, even though the room was big, dim, and full of people. He was standing not far from her, surrounded by his three best friends.
And, of course, he was looking at her, too. Their eyes met, and Lily felt a shiver run down her spine. Oh, she wanted him… She had never wanted anyone this badly…
"Here," said a voice behind her. Lily turned to get the drink Valerie was offering her, and smoothly brought her friend into the circle.
"Valerie, these are Caradoc Dearborn, Sturgis Podmore, and Paula Caldwell. Guys, this is Valerie Dantès, one of the best French Aurors."
The three smiled at her.
"Oh, really, I'm not. But it's very nice to meet you."
"Likewise," Caradoc said warmly. "I've heard a lot about you, Miss Dantès."
Of course Valerie had no way of knowing it, but Lily had once talked about her during an Order meeting, trying to decide whether to invite her to join.
"I just don't get it," Paula said, resuming her previous line of questioning. "If you and James work so well together - and you can't deny that you do -, why don't you get along better? It doesn't make any sense!"
"It's not supposed to make sense, Paula," Lily replied impatiently. "That's just the way things are."
"I haven't met him yet," Valerie piped up with a smile. "I'm looking forward to it. Everyone says he's so nice, even though Lily claims he's so annoying…"
"He's not at all annoying, you'll see."
"Go ahead and talk to him… See for yourself," Lily suggested, grinning. Valerie knew very well that James was a wonderful, charming, and attractive guy - Lily had categorically said so, several times.
"Is he the one you keep glancing at every once in a while?"
Lily's grin broadened. "Yes."
"Okay, then."
Valerie walked to the boys, silently wondering whether this James Potter was as fantastic as Lily seemed to think. Val had had her share of trauma with guys who gave the impression of being really nice, and had turned out to be extremely unpleasant, or rude, or annoying… the list went on and on.
Take Charles Friedrich, for instance: a charming, talented Auror… He and Valerie had fallen in love years ago, and had been a typical on/off couple since, basically because he refused to consider the possibility of ever marrying her one day.
Valerie frowned. She would have to find a way to stay away from Charles. So what if she continued to see him every once in a while for a pleasant romp in the sheets? Her strong emotional attachment to him had to be severed as soon as possible! Their relationship had no future, and they both knew it.
And Bernard… Bernard was really a great guy. He was a lot more forthright and passionate than Charles, and had completely swept her off her feet. Valerie had really fallen head over heels for him…
But for unknown reasons she hadn't managed to forget all about Charles. How could she, when she met him almost every single day? They worked terribly close to each other! Of course they weren't in the same team (that would've been torture), but still…
Valerie sometimes wished she could act like Lily - just leave it all behind and run away, completely forgetting about the past… But she couldn't. It was too hard! So many of her fondest memories were tied to Charles! And she still cared about him, there was no doubt about it. She still loved him, probably. But she had to do her best to deal with these feelings and get rid of them as soon as possible.
Valerie approached the four boys with a broad grin on her face. Of course she instantly picked out James: his gaze wandered to Lily every few seconds with unmistakeable intensity and impatience.
Oh, yes, he was handsome. It was little wonder that both Lily and Julia, two of the most beautiful women Val had ever met, were helplessly attracted to this guy. There was just something about him… She felt it, too, but surely not as strongly as either of her friends.
Valerie instinctively decided how to behave around this guy. She couldn't give him any opportunity to become arrogant, so she would have to tease him a bit.
She would make Lily proud.
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The night is filled with pretty girls - dancing shoes and flying hair
None of them would refuse to follow you up the stairs
You could have your pick of them; why did you decide to pick me?
You promised me you'd stay away; you promised me you'd set me free
Pounding of my heart, trembling of my hands, some things I'll just never understand
You know what to do to me; you know what it does to me…
Carly Simon, "You know what to do"
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"Hello," she greeted them.
Four evaluating glances looked her over for a couple of seconds, and Valerie felt strangely proud when James and his friends smiled approvingly, clearly liking what they saw.
"Hi," said the sandy-haired one. "I'm -"
"Let me guess," Val interrupted him with a smile, "you're Remus Lupin… the smart one."
He raised his eyebrows, surprised. "Yes… And you are -"
"Valerie Dantès."
It only took him a second to make the connection. "Lily's French friend?"
"Yes."
He grinned. "Nice to meet you, Miss Dantès."
"Likewise. And you," she said, looking at shortest Marauder, "are Peter Pettigrew - the sensitive one."
He grinned broadly. "Yes, I guess so."
Valerie then looked at James and Sirius, faking indecision and confusion. They were both staring at her expectantly.
"Lily?" she called loudly, frowning.
Her best friend turned.
"Which of them is the cute, charming one?" Val asked, gesturing towards James and Sirius and hoping her friend would catch the hint.
Of course she did.
Lily laughed and pointed at Sirius.
Valerie smiled - oh, it was great to have perceptive friends…
"You're Sirius Black, then," she said with a smile.
He nodded, guffawing. James looked positively discomfited.
Obviously, Val didn't want to make the situation any better for him. "And you," she said at last, "are Lily's work colleague. Uh - Jimmy something, right?"
James gaped at her for a second, stunned. Was that all Lily had mentioned about him? No comments, no compliments, nothing? Was he just a trivial co-worker?
Lily was approaching the group with a very impish grin, anxious to see the results of her friend's little joke. James glowered, but she didn't seem to notice it. She stood between Sirius and him, directly in front of Valerie.
"Aw, Lil, Jimmy is kind of cute," Valerie said pensively, looking at James. "He doesn't seem all that dull."
James frowned. Lily was finding his reaction very amusing. He was actually taking this seriously! He actually thought that she'd managed to keep lying to her friends, like -
'Okay, scratch that.'
Of course she would have managed to lie to her friends, and he knew it. But the truth was that she had done that far too much in the past. She now thought that it was silly to hide this from her friends… Not to mention that it would certainly be useful to discuss this situation with Leylann, who had a more or less similar relationship with Sirius Black.
Valerie glanced at James' cross look (he was definitely taking her seriously), at Lily's face (she was fighting back a grin with difficulty), and then couldn't take it anymore: she burst out laughing. Lily, Sirius, Remus and Peter followed suit.
James, a good sport, put an arm around her waist and playfully pulled her closer. "You sure can pick your friends," he said with a grin.
She smirked. "The look on your face was priceless, 'Jimmy'."
James' fingers tugged her dress lightly, idly stroking her waist. Why did it feel so normal, so bloody natural, to be around him like this? Lily had told Alain several times to keep his hands off her and even avoid kissing her in public… But right now she definitely wouldn't mind if James suddenly decided to -
Well, there wasn't much James could possibly want to do right now that would annoy her, under any circumstance.
"I'm sorry, James," Val said. "I really couldn't help myself."
"No problem," he replied dismissively.
"Well," Remus piped up suddenly. "I really have to go. I have to go to Paris to pick up my date."
"Paris?"
"Yeah."
"Who is she?"
"Oh, a French Auror - Sylvie Bonacieux."
Lily shook her head. "I've never -"
"I work with her!" Val squealed. "What a coincidence! That's so great! You guys are dating?"
"No, it's just - well, first date, you know," Remus replied with a grin. "Hopefully it won't take me too long to return. Bye, guys."
"Bye, Moony."
"Oh, and Lily?"
She looked at him, her expression carefully neutral. Oh, he'd better not mention what had happened earlier that evening…
"Don't drive him insane. If you can help it."
Lily laughed. "We'll see."
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Time is precious and it's slipping away; I've been waiting for you all my life
Nobody wants to be lonely - why don't you let me love you?
Can you hear my voice? Do you hear my song?
It's a serenade so your heart can find me
And suddenly, you're flying down the stairs, into my arms
Before I start going crazy, run to me, run to me, 'cause I'm dying…
Ricky Martin & Christina Aguilera, "Nobody wants to be lonely"
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James could sense from afar Remus' disapproval of his public display of affection. But damn it, he just couldn't help himself! Lily was standing right beside him, her laugh tickling his ears, her closeness wreaking havoc in his mind, her playful glances taunting him endlessly…
What did he care if the whole bloody world saw him hugging her? It sure as hell didn't bother James - as long as Julia wasn't around, that is. So what if everyone else thought they were having an affair or something?
He let his gaze rest on Lily. Merlin, she was beautiful. What had he done to deserve such a gorgeous woman? Surely she should have found a way to ignore him by now… But she hadn't, thankfully. She was still his, she still wanted him…
James hadn't tamed her, of course - he seriously doubted if anyone would ever manage to do that -, but… she had successfully tamed him. Lily had him completely under her control. He would do whatever it took to have her, whatever she wanted… and he would never, ever let her go…
Lily was talking to Sirius, but James knew that Padfoot only had her partial attention. James' fingers were still stroking her waist, and one of her hands was casually resting on his arm. They really weren't even trying to pretend there was just enmity between them…
Lily threw her head back and laughed at something Sirius had said. James' breath caught as he saw something on her neck: a bite-mark. Oh, Merlin… How had Lily missed that? A simple spell would've taken care of it!
"Lily," he said softly.
She didn't turn to look at him, but James knew she was paying attention.
"On your neck, there's -"
Lily turned at last, a mischievous smile on her face. "I know."
James raised an eyebrow, and for a few seconds didn't quite know what to say. Merlin… the girl was walking around with his tooth marks on her neck and she didn't care? She had a boyfriend, for goodness' sake! Why wasn't she -
James groaned inwardly. He wasn't used to this kind of thing… Lily was so serious, and yet so kinky sometimes! He remembered very well that she had used to come up with the strangest ideas… Well, he did, too… And of course things never got boring.
There was really no way to resist such a girl.
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I've got more than a girl could wish for
I live my dreams, but it's not all they say
Still I believe I'm missing something real
I need someone who really sees me
Don't wanna wake up alone anymore…
The Corrs, "All The Love In the World"
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"You know, Lil," Sirius said softly, "there's something on your neck."
Valerie and Peter nodded, smiling. James had spotted Julia a few minutes ago and, to his great annoyance, had had to let go of Lily to spend time with his girlfriend.
Lily grinned. "I know."
Sirius chortled. "What, do you reckon that Prongs will consider it a turn-on? That you're proudly parading his bite-mark on your neck, not at all caring about what the rest of the world will think?"
She laughed.
"He does love it, you know."
"Yeah."
Poor James… he certainly wouldn't stop thinking about Lily while he was with Julia. Well, he always thought of Lily anyway, so…
Sirius inhaled sharply, and decided to ask the big question point-blank. "Are you still in love with James?"
"No," Lily answered instantly. "Really, no."
"It doesn't look like it."
"He - I'm just attracted to him, Sirius. That's all, I swear."
"Not even the teensiest bit of love left?"
"No!" she replied, annoyed. "Of course not! No way!"
Sirius' stomach lurched unpleasantly. Oh, shit.
Lily was scared of being in love with James - that much was terribly obvious. She was downright terrified. And she still wasn't sure whether their relationship would be purely physical.
Sirius knew for a fact that his best friend, despite all his claims of being over Lily, still had some feelings for her. Those feelings were often expressed in the weirdest ways - James' habit of preferring to work with redheads was one, and the incessant nitpicking of his girlfriends, subconsciously comparing them to Lily, was another.
"Why don't you care about your boyfriend? I mean - from what I hear, you've been fooling around with other guys for a while," Sirius continued.
Now, this was another big question. He had to try and understand how Lily's mind worked now… Sirius really didn't want James to get hurt again.
"Alain? Merlin, he's dull," she replied at once. She then looked significantly at Sirius. "And, to make matters worse, he's - mechanical. He can't do anything properly, you know. Absolutely nothing."
Her reply caught Sirius off guard. Why on earth was she dating a guy like that?
"Why are you with him, then?" Peter asked, puzzled.
Lily shrugged. "I guess I enjoy the security. And also, the respectability is useful."
Sirius nodded. Bloody marvellous.
Lily Evans, the oh-so-commitment-phobic ice queen, was in truth really incredibly pro-commitment. She was just so scared of being vulnerable that she forced herself to commit to guys about whom she didn't care.
Oh, yeah… James was surely going to remedy that.
"You should try and teach him, Lil," Valerie said with a smirk. "I'm sure he'll improve if you're patient."
Lily grimaced. "I'm not a patient girl, Val."
"I think -"
Valerie stopped talking abruptly, staring at someone behind Lily. What was he doing here?
"Hello, Val," the newcomer greeted brightly. "Hey, Lily."
He just stood there, looking at Valerie. Why did he always have to make her feel so weak? Why did his tanned skin have to look so touchable? Why did he always manage to look so helpless, so needy for comfort and love?
"Charles," Valerie said in a faint whisper. "What are you doing here?"
Oh, damn him! Of course he'd chosen to meet her when she was alone, and vulnerable… And he'd obviously be around all night, teasing her with his presence until she gave in… Really, there was no point in resisting. She was going to surrender at some point…
"Sirius, Peter," Lily said with a smile, "this is Charles Friedrich, one of the best French Chief Aurors. Charles, these are Sirius Black and Peter Pettigrew."
Charles shook the two men's hands, but everyone could tell that the only person on his mind right now was Valerie.
She bit her lip, unsuccessfully trying to avoid his eyes.
If only Lily would do something, anything, to make her snap out of this trance! Valerie could feel herself sliding, helplessly succumbing to his fascination…
Charles approached Valerie and embraced her, tenderly kissing her forehead. In a reflex, she blindly searched for his lips, encircling his neck with her arms.
Lily sighed. It was always like this…
"They've been on and off for a long time," she quietly explained to Sirius. "She's just - never able to reject him. He's -"
She caught herself right before she disclosed needlessly revealing details that could apply to Valerie and Charles as much as to Lily and James.
Sirius noticed it, and grinned. He really had no reason to be worried. Lily and James had been waiting for each other all along.
It was really only a matter of time.
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