What is Love?
A/N: Not much happens here and I'm sorry it is such a short chapter, but I think it deserves its own space. I hope next update is soon and I hope you like the chapter. R&R please :D I love reviews!
CHAPTER XXI
The Girl Who Trapped Us
Is it too late?
Nothing to salvage
You look away
Clear of the damage
The meaning to
Our words of love
Has disappeared
We used to love one another
Give to each other
Lie undercover so
Are you friend or foe?
Love one another
Live for each other
So, are you friend or foe?
'Cause I used to know
The promises
Hollow concessions
An innocent
Show of affection
I touch your hand
A hologram
Are you still there?
(Friend or Foe by T.A.T.U.)
2004 - Hermione's flat
After regaining his composure following Harry's statement, Ron watched the exchange of looks between the former lovers and was blank for a moment, after which, he stepped forward and between Harry and Hermione, knowing this was only hurting the woman he loved. "Thank you, Harry. I appreciate all you've said, but I think it's time for you to leave. She doesn't have the answer you seek," he said, interupting them.
Harry and Hermione both flinched with the sudden movement that disturbed the peace that had surrounded them for a few seconds. Harry just stared blankly at the other man while Hermione managed to recover herself from the initial shock of his statement and reacted. "Ron! What are you doing?" she asked.
"I'm just telling him that he has no more business here," he defended.
"Who in the hell do you think you are?" Harry replied angrily when his head finally caught up with him. "She is as much part of my life as she is of yours!"
"I'm still bleeding standing here!" she yelled but none appeared to hear her. The peace between the three that she'd expected after Harry's words, was crumbling.
"Are you sure? Because I remember that just a few minutes ago you said you wanted closure..." Ron responded defyingly.
"I am NOT walking out of here until she tells me she wants me out!"
"You wanna bet?"
"Stop for just a minute, will you two?" she almost screamed. The two started talking but Hermione raised a finger and shut them up. Harry opened his mouth and Hermione glared at him. "Ah!" she said and Harry obliged.
"Why is it that I am in the middle and you two just keep talking about me as if I were some kind of trophy?" Ron started to respond but Hermione continued. "Well I'm not! I was wrong, you were wrong and you were wrong, and that's all there is to it. It is 2004 for crying out loud!"
"That was my original point!"
"Shut up, Potter, you were about to pick a fight with him."
"No, I wasn't!"
She gave him a knowing look and Harry bit his lip. "Now, you just told me something..."
"And he had your answer from your silence," Ron continued.
"How many times do I have to tell you two to NOT finish my sentences so you can get it through your thick skull!"
"Fine, what IS your answer then?" Ron finally cracked it and Hermione fixed her eyes on him, remaining quiet. "So?"
I am carrying Harry's baby, I might as well tell him. He deserves that much at least.
What are you talking about? She argued with herself, you will only make it worse!
The truth shall set you free... Oh cut it with the movie lines! The increasingly annoying voice in her head told her.
"Hermione! Are you still with us?" Harry's voice broke her inner rant and she blinked and shook her head.
"Sorry, what were you saying?"
"I was asking you..."
"Right, that," she finished as her tongue made it clear that it was in total disagree of her speaking.
August 1998 - The Burrow
It had already been two months since Graduation, and all the news she heard from Harry were in The Daily Prophet. When school was over, it had hit Hermione harder than anyone else. She had no place to go; no place she could call 'home' anymore. Her parents' house wasn't; it was just a depressing old house in the middle of a city that was almost entirely muggle. She knew no one and had no job, so fat chance she could call it home.
Her second home could've been Grimmauld Place, where she had stayed when with Harry, but not anymore either. The old house wasn't as welcoming anymore. All she had left was a degree and a boyfriend, after whom she had started to have doubts when they left school, but she didn't think she wanted or could do without him, if she was being honest with herself.
She had one more place she could maybe call home, where loved ones were... the Weasleys. As soon as school ended, Molly and Arthur had come to her and asked her to move to the Burrow with them; at first she had refused, not wanting to impose on them or recieve pity from them. But then she'd had to, for she had nowhere else to go; at least until she found a job.
So Hermione Granger had packed her belongings and moved them to the cozy Weasley home. Luckily, it wasn't so crowded anymore since Fred and George still lived in Diagon Alley, above their shop. She was loved there, and felt good to some point. By staying there, she didn't have time to get depressed or think too much because she was busy all day halping around or hanging with Ginny or Ron.
Despite everything, and she felt horrible about it, Hermione wasn't happy there. There was a thorne stuck in her heart, and she was sure she couldn't get it out while bieng with Ron. Maybe it had to do with Harry, maybe it had to do with Ron, or maybe it only had to do with herself... but she wasn't going ot find out by staying here.
With a heavy heart, she sat one night and wrote a letter. One to Ron, one to Ginny and one for Molly and Arthur, thanking them and apologizing for leaving like that. To Ron, she apologized in any way she could think of, and to Ginny, she only explained… and said farewell.
The house was deserted; everyone was sleeping, and she tiptoed to each of the rooms. She left Mr.&Mrs. Weasley's letter on the drawer and sighed, hoping they wouldn't be too disappointed and walked out.
Next, it was Ginny's room. Carefully, she opened the door, which creaked a little and Hermione winced. Ginny was a light sleeper, so she stirred. The pretty brunette stayed frozen in the spot until she thought the other girl was asleep again, and she let out the breath she had been holding. Hermione continued silently through the small bedroom and left the letter on Ginny's night table. She looked at the younger girl for the longest time; her best girl friend in the whole world. She would contact her when she was settled...
"Hermione, why are you staring at me like that? It's freaky," Ginny's muffled voice came from the pillow and she turned around.
Hermione gasped at the surprise. "Oh! Did I wake you?"
"And I thought you knew me better than that..." she said rather moodily and wandlessly turned the light on.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to."
"Well, you did. Now, what are you doing here?" she asked as her eyes adjusted to the new light and stopped short. "Why are you on travelling robes? Is this some sort of midnight adventure? Because I thought those ended after the battle..." she said.
Hermione had to laugh... she would miss Ginny's remarks. "No, no midnight adventure, Gin," she explained.
"Then wha- you are not leaving, are you?" Hermione didn't respond, she just looked down at the floor and immediately Ginny sat upright, all traces of sleepiness gone from her pretty face. "Why? What's going on?"
"I- just have to leave... can't really explain, well, not verbally at least," she said and gave Ginny the letter she had written for her.
Ginny stared at it for a moment and then yanked it away from her, tearing it in pieces. "This― is― rubbish!" she exclaimed as she tore and tore.
"Ginny! What are you doing?" she said, alarmed.
"Oh, cut it out already Hermione! You are bleeding scared and are just running away."
"No, I'm not!" she defended herself and cast a silencing charm on the room so they wouldn't wake the others in the house.
"Aren't you?" the redhead inquired. Hermione opened her mouth to speak a couple of times and closed it again, alack of words. "You are such a chicken," she reprimended.
"I'm not! I just-" she cracked under the intense chocolate brown gaze of her friend and a tear trickled down her cheek. "I can't stay! It- I can't! Too many things, and so much- I can't Ginny, please understand!" she cried.
Ginny was startled by this sudden confession. Hermione had always been the strong one to her eyes; even if she had done wrong with the git Harry. All she managed to do was put her arms around her friend and confort her. "Shhhh... shhh, it's all right, Mione."
"No, it's not! I'm a horrible person, Ginny!"
"No you aren't… you're just- confused, that's all," she pulled away and looked at Hermione in the eyes, brushing a tear from her cheek and smiling softly, holding the other girl an arm away by the shoulders. "You just need time to yourself, that's all. I understand."
"You do?"
"Yes, it's fine… as long as you don't take too long to figure it out," Ginny chuckled.
Hermione joined her and shook her head. "I promise… thanks, Gin, you have no idea how much this means to me…" she said and hugged her friend tightly goodbye. She finally stood and kissed Ginny's forehead gently. "Thanks, I will stay in touch," she said and walked out.
Ginny just sighed and looked out her window. "Maybe one day they will fix it…" she whispered and lay back down, her head resting on the pillow she had gotten from the trio on Christmas her fifth year. It was magicked so it accomodated to whatever position she was in. With one more sigh, she went back to sleep.
Hermione stood outside Ron's room for the longest time, just staring at the door and gathering courage. At last, she stepped in quietly. She laughed a little at the posture he slept in; he looked like a mummy, all twisted up in the sheets, and a small snore could be heard.
The young woman walked towards him and left the thick letter on his nightstand, watching him sleep for a little while, like she had done a couple times before. Tilting her head to a side, she admired how handsome he looked when not angry or something. Finally, she leaned forward and kissed his lips softly. "Bye, Ron, I hope you can udnerstand why I do this," she said and drew back, sighing and dissapparating a second later.
2004 - Hermione's flat
Both boys, now 24 years old, were staring at her, and she was saying nothing. She came back to reality and watched them for a moment. Who would've thought it... she said to herself sadly. And to think that I am the one keeping the two from being who they were back then...
She swallowed hard, but it was useless. Her hormones were revolted and this was the moment of truth. She would have to speak, and that would define a lot for their future… and the baby's future.
Tears overtook her willpower and a small stream of crystal formed in her cheeks. She just ran out of the sitting room, and into her own room. Both young men were startled at this; it wasn't normal that Hermione started to cry out of nowhere. They looked at each other and immediately followed.
"Mione!" Harry called after her.
"Hermione, come back here!" Ron echoed as they reached the bedroom.
"What's the matter, Hermione, are you all right? I'm starting to get worried," Harry said sincerely.
Hermione was covering her face with her hands and she looked up, her eyes trying to say so much for her. "Don't, Harry!"
"Then tell us why you just start to cry out of nowhere?" Ron inquired.
"It's nothing! Please leave me alone."
"No, I won't."
"It's definitely not an option," Harry continued Ron's trail of talking and stepped closer to touch her, but she backed away. "Hermione!"
"Harry, please just go."
"No, I won't!"
"Please!" she cried.
"No!"
Now it was Ron's turn to speak. "Mione, we won't leave you like this. Please tell us what's wrong," he said softly, trying in vane to touch her.
"This wasn't supposed to be like that. We were best friends, Ron! We were supposed to be together forever, Harry!" she said, tears flowing down her pretty face.
"I'm sorry, Mione, we never meant for this to happen but…"
"But it did, and there is nothing we can do about it anymore," Ron continued.
Harry knelt beside her. "Too many things have happened to fix them so easily… now, tell me what's really wrong," he asked, putting a hand on her knee and Hermione pushed it away, standing up.
"We have to!" she said firmly.
"Why?" Harry asked, standing up after her.
"Because I'm pregnant!" Hermione finally cracked and took a hand to her mouth, looking at both men's shocked expressions. She couldn't handle it, so she ran off, slamming the door behind her. "We have to!" she screamed through the wood, both hands resting there.
Neither was able to move for at least a moment. This had hit the two like a tornado in a small town. It's mine... Harry thought, but it can be Ron's too... his body was still refusing to move, even though he desperately willed it to.
"I don't want to have to raise him away from the two…" she whispered through the door. Suddenly, her head jerked up and her eyes opened wide. "There is no other way..." she said to herself. "Colloportus!" wandlessly, she sealed the door and sat there for a moment, staring at it, until she heard hard knocks and angry sounds from the inside. She backed away, unable to believe herself. "I hope they don't kill each other…" she said and apparated away.