Unofficial Portkey Archive

What is Love?

A/N: This chapter is going to be longer than others, but it's because I'm giving you a little more to ponder about *evil grin* regarding both Harry and Hermione's behavior. Happy reading!

CHAPTER VII

Never Again

The force that through the green fuse drives the flower

Drives my green age; that blasts the roots of trees

Is my destroyer.

And I am dumb to tell the crooked rose

My youth is bent by the same wintry fever.

(.- Dylan Thomas)

December 1996 - Hogwarts

It was almost Christmas now and Hermione sat on the Library; she was in silence, with a book opened in front of her, but she wasn't really reading it. Instead, she was staring at a small box wrapped in red and gold, with a green paper attached. Slowly, a tear made its way down her cheek.

Moments later, she felt a big strong hand on her shoulder and quickly brushed her tears away. "Hi Neville, having a good evening?" she asked.

Neville sighed and sat down next to her. "Actually, not at all."

Hermione looked at him and cocked her head to a side. "What's the matter?" she asked.

"You," he simply answered.

"What do you mean?"

"You, Harry, Ron… all of this rubbish," he said gesturing to the air.

"We're all fine, don't worry."

"Like hell you are well! I know this is surely a hard time for you-but I just saw you crying… you never cry," he pointed out.

"Maybe I was thinking about how I'll be spending Christmas without my parents," she said daggers.

Neville sagged. "I'm sorry Mione, I didn't mean-"

She sighed and looked at him, wiping her eyes. "Actually, that was not it… not entirely, that is."

He sat by her side and held her tight for a moment, stroking her back. A moment later she pulled away, little wet trails making her cheeks sparkle; Neville wiped the tears away with a thumb and smiled softly at her. "He should be here with you, not me," he said heavily.

She laughed a little. "You're right, he should but I guess he needs this time."

"But what about you, Mione? I would be inclined to think that he should be the one getting over himself, not you."

Hermione sighed and smiled at him. "You're always so good to me…" she said and trailed off, her eyes traveled to the box again."I was looking at the gift I had bought him before everything happened," she admitted, glad to have someone outside the sacred trio and family to talk to and trust.

He nodded, his eyes hardening a little. "I think you should snap him from his stupidity. He's been acting like a git lately."

"Well…" she started to defend him, but found no valid argument."He has, hasn't he?"

Neville nodded again. "I mean, I understand, I really do but it's just not him. He's probably gone to a weird non-relating-at-all mode because he's scared, but-."

"I know what you mean; I just don't know what to do."

"I reckon that what he needs is a good smack in the head by the right person, and that person is you," Neville assured with a smile.

Hermione smiled back and nodded. She stood up and started to walk away but turned around with a glint in her eyes. "When did you become Mr. Perception?" she asked.

Neville shrugged with a laugh. "Maybe teenage years finally got to me. And maybe some certain red-head that I'm seeing…" he winked at her.

Hermione gasped. "You- and Ginny are-? Merlin's beard, that's brilliant!"

Neville blushed a little. "Sort of. Yes, I am extremely happy too… as a matter of fact I can hardly believe it," he admitted.

Hermione kissed him on the cheek. "Why would that be? You're wonderful! If I wasn't so stupidly in love with that git, I would definitely try and win you over," she said with a smile.

"I'll hold you to that," he said and winked at her again as she walked out of the Library. Neville watched her leave; he'd loved her for so long, but now he was utterly taken by Ginny. He figured the whole fancying Hermione was just because she was the only one to have faith in him apart from Harry. He just hoped she could bring back the old Harry, because he was definitely having a hard time putting up with all his I've-got-so-much-over-my-shoulders-and-you-can't-even-imagine-it-because-your-things-are-not-nearly-as-important attitude.

She went looking for him, unable to wait any longer. She figured if he wasn't in the Library or in the Common Room, then he probably was sulking somewhere near the pitch. Granted, Harry was sitting by the lake, staring at the horizon with a lost look in his face. She came closer and watched him for a little while before coughing softly to get him to acknowledge her presence.

Harry looked up, surprised. He knew every single sound she made, and that was definitely Hermione's fake cough. To be honest, she was the last person he'd expected to see, not to mention that he was terrified of seeing her because he was afraid that seeing her close would make his determination fail. "Uhm… hi Mione, what are you doing here? Looking for another way to get yourself killed? Or do you have any other close relatives you don't like?" he asked and was utterly surprised to hear those harsh words coming out of his mouth. You're such an insensitive git; it would've done with a `hi' and nothing more.

She gasped a little and felt like running back to her own bedroom, but remembered Neville's words and took a deep breath. "All right Harry, you want to act like that, fine! But you'll have to hear me first," she started and stopped at the look in Harry's face.

He focused his attention in Hermione and was completely befuddled at her words. His eyes widened in an expression of a boy that was caught stealing candy. He didn't feel able to speak, but apparently his mouth didn't quite agree with it. "Just talk, and fast," he heard his voice say and he seemed as surprised as her to hear it.

She sagged and pushed the tears away; she squeezed her eyes shut and then took an encouraging breath as she started. "You are nothing but a coward, Harry Potter," she stated with shaky voice and then seemed to gain confidence, so she continued. "Oh, everyone around me is in danger, I have a big bad burden on my shoulders, I should always be alone," she said in a high-pitched mocking voice.

Harry frowned and stood up. "You, have no idea what you are saying Hermione, and you are being very childish, to be honest."

"Oh really? I'm sorry; I don't quite remember Mr. Harry Autistic Potter."

Harry narrowed his eyes and closed the distance between them; feeling his heart thumping fiercely and his temper rise. "Well, I'm sorry Miss I-don't-care-if-I-get-killed! I'm sorry to tell you, but I care! Apparently more than you," he echoed Hermione's way of saying things right now.

"You have no idea what you are talking about! Are we going through this again? I think I remember quite well someone that told me we would get through everything together!"

"Things are different now. People have died if you didn't notice!"

She narrowed her eyes at him. "I did notice when I went back to my house, thank you very much," she snapped. Anyone that didn't know Hermione Granger well would have thought that she hated Harry's very guts at that moment.

Harry looked at her and his eyes apologized for him; he felt terrible about this whole thing. Once more, he reassured himself in what he'd decided back in November. He looked at her and grabbed her by the arms. "This isn't just some lame lovers promise. This is real life!"

Hermione gasped at this. "Oh, so you think that everything we said were just stupid lovers promises, then? Very well, then I take back what I said. You're not a coward, you are a coward and a liar!" she turned around, tears stinging her eyes.

Harry gaped at her for the longest moment and then got rid of everything his mind told him at the moment; he hurried to where she was and put a hand on her arm.

She pushed it away roughly. "Don't- touch me Harry. I'm glad I finally saw how it really was."

"Hermione, that's not true. You know I meant everything I said but now-."

"That's the thing, I don't think you did."

"Now things are different," he finished his sentence, raising his voice a little over hers.

"If you think that of me, then I never meant to you as much as you did to me," she raised her voice over his.

"I don't want you to get killed. Back then it might've been just a stupid fear, but now-."

"Because when you love someone, you respect them-." They were nearly yelling right now and a fairly big crowd was watching the show; Ron among them.

"Now it is real! Wha- I do respect you! I've been dying the past month and a half. I love you too much to want you to get hurt!" he finally yelled.

"And you obviously d-." She stopped in mid sentence when Harry yelled so desperately, and she noticed his eyes shining with tears held back.

Meanwhile, Ron was also dumbstruck at Harry's words and he also noticed his friend's over-bright eyes. With a sag and a sigh, he started ushering the audience back to the castle, using his prefect status.

Hermione and Harry stood there, staring at each other for the longest time. Finally, Hermione broke the awkward moment and threw her arms around him. "Oh Harry!" was all she managed to say.

Harry hesitantly wrapped his arms around her and enjoyed the warmth of her body, which he had missed so much. He watched as people cleared and was very grateful to his friend. He finally closed his eyes and rested his head on top of hers.

2004 - Gimmauld Place, London

She didn't know how long she stood there, wide eyed at Harry's reaction. When a drop of rain fell on her cheek, she was brought back to reality and frowned. Excuse me? If I remember well, he was the one acting like a jerk half of sixth year, which eventually guided me away from him… is there something I'm missing? She thought; two more raindrops made her blink and look for shelter under his porch. Well, actually you were the one to kiss his best friend and then just tell him to sod off, to put it in few words.

She slipped to the ground and covered her face. That is so not true! It was his fault! Was it not? "Oh I'm probably going mad!" she whined to the air.

She stood and started walking back to her hotel, the rain pouring over her now. How would you have reacted to that? "I know, it was probably a self-preservation weird thing-but still, we could've worked it out. I mean, we did agree to that from the beginning…" And look where it led to, the voice said in her head. "Am I a terrible person? Did I rush?" I'd say you weren't exactly very supportive. "Aw, come on! My parents were killed! And I never blamed him!" she said angrily out loud to the voice. A couple of people looked at her and she shrunk; after a moment, she sighed. "Fine! I wasn't exactly supportive. But I can try and make it up!"

She closed her fist and smiled. Seconds later, she was sitting on the porch, half under the rain. She would wait for him there and catch him before he went to work the next day. Hermione rested her head on the wall and closed her eyes softly, trying to justify her acts judging by the situation after all this time; thing she had never had the courage to do.

November 1996 - Hogwarts

The usually merry environment of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardy was gloom and silent nowadays. Everyone was scared to go out, for no one could trust anyone anymore. There was no way of knowing who was in which band. There were Death Eaters everywhere, listening to everything and getting their way whenever they wanted, there were aurors and Order members patrolling the streets, especially when Harry went out.

This annoyed the trio -which had distanced since Harry and Hermione had started dating-- utterly because they couldn't go around when they wanted anymore; there was always someone tailing them. Every once in a while, when Dumbledore had to go out to something related to the Order and Moody couldn't be around either, they would sneak around the castle to hear something… anything!

That's how they had found out about the most important plans the Order was having, and it appeared they were doing very good so far; doing raids and catching Voldemort's most faithful servants. It seemed to Harry that they didn't need him for anything but perform a killing curse or duel Voldemort to death.

There had been very valuable downs in both sides; Hagrid had been tortured to near insanity because they knew he was one of Dumbledore's closest allies and he didn't have a wand to defend himself. He had been kept in the Room of Requirement for nearly six months and now that he was coming back to the world, he wasn't the same person he'd once been.

Voldemort had lost one of his right hand men, Avery, in a raid the Order had set up, and Azkaban was almost full-up with Death Eaters. The amnesties that had taken place last time weren't taken into account now. This time, Voldemort had planned everything very thoroughly and there was hardly any mistake at all, so if someone was caught with their hands in the act, they were punished without mercy.

Hermione's parents had suffered the consequences of her relationship with Harry; they had been attacked and abducted; the ransom was an unarmed Harry coming straight to Voldemort's Headquarters on Halloween. Luckily for the trio, the Order had acted before them, but Hermione's parents hadn't been so lucky. When the Death Eaters found out that it wasn't Harry coming, they had instantly killed Anne and Joel Granger.

After that, Harry of course had blamed himself and broken up with Hermione for a month and a half now. During that time, he had completely isolated himself and would only come out of his permanent sulking to guide the Quidditch Team and in the DA meetings, in which he hardly spoke to her.

Ron, on the other hand, seemed pretty happy while the Dream Team -how people had started calling the Harry and Hermione couple- was split and he appeared much more sociable with Hermione under the excuse of being there for her. He still hung out with Harry, but Harry would push him away very abruptly and walk away muttering things he never quite made out.

In his self-isolation, Harry had definitely changed; it appeared that what held him from falling into a deep hole of self-pity and self-blaming was Hermione, and he didn't have her anymore. He would never speak in class, but would get outstanding grades; and whenever he spoke, he usually made sarcastic comments. At the beginning, they were rather funny for his classmates; but now it just made them feel bad.

It was past midnight and Harry had just got back from detention with Snape for "disrespecting" him by telling him that most of the professors weren't as unpleasant as himself and that's why he wasn't anyone's favourite; except maybe for the Slytherins.

In the Common Room was only Ginny, who was studying for an OWL preparation test of Charms in two days. She looked up at Harry with hopeful eyes, "oh Harry! I'm so glad you're here! Can you please help me with this enchantment? I don't think I'm getting the movement right. I won't be able to come to practice tomorrow if I don't get this straight, please?"

"You really need practice; lately you seem to have butter fingers," he said in a detached tone. "Charms won't be of much help anyways," he commented.

Ginny frowned. "Excuse me? I'm sorry if I put my homework before Practice!" she snapped and then sagged. "I'm sorry Harry, I'm just really stressed. I didn't mean to jump at you," she said honestly.

"You're lucky you don't have to save the world, believe me, Charms is nothing compared to that."

Ginny flinched a little. "What's wrong with you, Harry?" she asked.

"Nothing, I'm just pointing the facts out," he shrugged.

"I'm going to bed."

"Good night Ginny."

"Night Harry."

January 1997 - Hogwarts

"Bloody hell Harry, why wouldn't you see this coming before! We might even get expelled! My mum will kill me!" Ron was protesting.

Harry turned to him, annoyed. "Listen, we're in this and there's no way out anymore so stop whining! Besides, if you hadn't slipped, we wouldn't be here!" Harry snapped.

Ron was about to retort this with an `it's not my fault that we're in the middle of winter!' comment but Hermione spoke first and he let it go with a huff.

"Oh Harry! We should've planned this more thoroughly!"

"Would you please let me think for a moment?"

Hermione made an exasperated sound. "Fine! See if the Grand Harry Potter can find a way out!" she whispered back as the enforcer looked at them suspiciously.

He snapped his fingers and kissed her. "That's it! Great Mione! We'll be out in no time!"

Ron and Hermione looked at him puzzled and shook their heads. Ron shrugged, "Hey, whatever to get out of here."

Harry smiled at him and winked. "The Great Happy Potter will get us out mate." He turned around and put his hands on the bars. Taking into account the events in the past months, the Ministry had set a time limit for underage wizards to be out of their homes. The trio had overheard Snape talking about a trap the Order had set to get at least a dozen Death Eaters for questioning. Of course, Harry had talked them into going to the place to listen to the questionings. But it was January and the ground was covered in snow; Ron had slipped and his foot had come off the Invisibility Cloak, costing them to get caught by an enforcer during his usual rounds.

Harry put up a smile and waved a hand to the enforcer in charge. "Excuse me, could you please come?"

The enforcer frowned and stood, walking to them. "Yes, what do you need?" he asked a little hesitantly.

Harry noticed he seemed to be a rookie that wasn't used to his authority position yet, and he was definitely going to use that for his advantage. "Uhm… what's your name?" he started and rolled his eyes mentally.

"Er… it's Manford."

He reached out his hand. "I'm Harry Potter, pleased to meet you," he said with a smile. Hermione immediately understood where this was going and smiled, rolling her eyes.

Manford flinched and stood open mouth for a second. "Really? Are you really Harry Potter?" he asked with a glint in his eyes. "Do you mind if I-?"

"Sure!" Harry smiled and lifted his hair to reveal the scar.

He gasped. "It's really you! What are you doing here? You know you are not supposed to, but I imagine you had- Oh! I'm so sorry, let me get you out of here, please!"

He said all this very quickly and Harry could barely manage to hold his smile and hide the surprise at how well this all was turning out.

Manford managed to open the door and the three walked out with huge grins on their faces. He shook their hands with pride. "Then you must be Ron Weasley, the Minister's son; and Hermione Granger, the brightest witch your age! Tell me, is it all true, what they say?" he asked eagerly.

Hermione blushed and Ron's ears turned bright pink; no one was able to say anything so Harry took the word. "Yes, it is all true indeed. Except for the rubbish The Daily Prophet published last year, that is."

"Oh, I never believed them; I always thought they were being utterly stupid. So, how do you manage to-."

Harry started to go with the flow, seeing how much respect and admiration this Manford guy seemed to have for them. He held up a hand and the man quieted, Harry was very surprised but managed to hide it. "Uhm… could you please forget you ever saw us, Officer Manford? We had something going on and it cannot go out to the media or anything, please?"

Hermione and Ron were completely bewildered at the act he was pulling; they were both standing open-mouthed at it.

Manford seemed a little unconvinced at this. "Well, you see," he started somehow justifying himself in front of Harry. "The thing is that I have to report it or I could lose me job."

"No you won't," Harry assured. "There's no one apart from us here and we won't tell anyone, promise," he said nodding his head. Ron and Hermione did the same.

He still looked reluctant and Harry decided to use his wild card once again. "Please, as a special favor to me? I would definitely owe you for this one…" he said with a smile.

At this, he looked much more convinced and smiled back. "All right, you can go and nothing happened here!" he said and moved out of the way.

Harry grinned widely and almost jumped but decided against it, only shaking his hand energetically instead. "Thank you very much, Officer Manford, I really appreciate it!" And with that, they were gone.

"Man that was bloody brilliant! You should do that more often!" Ron exclaimed as they walked back to school.

Hermione was holding Harry's hand, but she was rather idle. He turned to her with a confused expression. "What's the matter, Mione?"

She was snapped back to reality. "Huh? Uh, nothing. Just thinking that you should be careful with that, that's all."

Harry leaned his head to a side, and before he could say anything, Ron interjected. "Are you kidding me? We could get everything we wanted!"

"Exactly my point, we shouldn't abuse it"

"You know I would never-"

"I hope so…" she said, more to herself than to her boyfriend.

2004 - Grimmauld Place, London

Hermione was as curled up as possible to avoid getting wetter than she already was. She had her knees pulled to her chest and her arms around them, bracing them in a useless attempt to keep herself from freezing to death in the cold, wintry atmosphere that surrounded England at the beginning of December. In the midst of all the drama, she never thought of casting a water-repelling spell on herself.

She was shivering now and tried wrapping her arms around herself in order to give it another shot to keep her body's warmth, which she was sure she had lost little over an hour ago; in the fourth hour waiting there. She could still feel the rain pouring on her but had lost most sensibility throughout the hours.

Finally, with a last sigh, she closed her eyes and fell asleep in the warmth that was starting to fill her. "I hope I don't catch a flu…" she muttered as a veil of black fell in front of her eyes and a swirl of more memories flooded her mind once again.

February 1997 - Hogwarts

"Harry, it's Valentine's Day!"

"I know baby, but I have to do this," he excused himself as he came closer and wrapped his arms around her waist.

"You don't really have to," Hermione protested with a pout and Harry smiled.

"You look beautiful when you pout like that. Besides, when have we needed a special day to prove how much we love each other," he replied with a mischievous twinkle in his emerald green eyes.

"Still! Those girls will be all over you, and I don't like it. It's ridiculous!"

"I don't see you thinking it's ridiculous when it's you on top…" Harry said suggestively and started kissing her neck.

Hermione moaned softly and then shook her head to not lose herself in his kisses and had to gather all of her willpower to pull away. "I think giving autographs is too much. Honestly, you're talking this too far!"

"But that pays for our little escapades, doesn't it?" he said seductively and strolled closer.

Hermione closed her eyes and sighed. "Fine! But if you take longer than 5pm, not even an escapade to Paris will save you!"

"I won't take longer than that, promise," he said with a triumphant smile and she let him hold her. He started kissing her deeply, slowly going down her neck, his hand caressing her sides.

All of a sudden, he lifted her and they both walked towards the Prefect's bathroom, their own little privacy spot. He cast a small mattress and laid her there, working his way down her robes and to her belly button; her special "G" point.

It was 5:15 and Hermione waited outside a new fancy restaurant called Magical Makings: The old muggle way. It was supposed to make all of the dishes with a regular oven and stuff; the only Magic you could see was when the plate was served and when it disappeared after you were done. The owner was a former Hufflepuff who had gone to school with Bill and Charlie and was a muggle-born.

5:20 and she was fuming, tapping her right foot on the ground with her arms crossed. Finally, she saw a mat of jet black messy hair hurrying towards the Restaurant; she huffed and averted his gaze.

Harry got there and doubled to rest his hands on his knees, panting. A moment later, he straightened and when he saw her face, he knew he was in trouble. He sighed, "I'm sorry Mione, just that this girl asked me to get a-"

She held up a hand and hushed him. "I told you 5pm, you know how long I've been waiting here outside like a cheap whore?" she asked angrily.

Harry flinched. "Hey! You don't need to get so worked up, I said I was sorry!" he protested.

"You always are."

"I- I dunno what to say Mione, I was caught up and it got late. But I am here now and we'll have a wonderful evening," he tried.

She rolled her eyes. "I was waiting, you know?" she said, letting in a little.

"Maybe this will help matters," he said with a small smile as he put a small package on her hand.

Hermione looked down at her hand and a small smile started playing around her lips. "You can't buy me, you know?" she said, but she wasn't as angry anymore.

"Open it," Harry just said.

Hermione opened the little red box and gasped. Inside, there was a very simple silver necklace with a small locket hanging in the end. It had the form of a star intertwined with a heart and had small diamonds lining it. "Oh my goodness! This is beautiful Harry!" she noticed the box and gasped again. "And it's a Tiffany's! It must've cost you a fortune!"

"It was certainly worth it just to see you smile like that," he put a hand on her cheek and caressed it. "And I had to get you the best present ever, it is after all our first Velentine's," he smiled.

Hermione let him out it on her neck and then threw her arms around him. "I'm giving your present later today," she whispered in his ear.

Harry's grin couldn't be wider after this. He took her hand and held the door opened for her. "After you, my lady."

As soon as they entered, a burst of whispers was heard and they were given the best table in a private room at candle light by no less than the owner of the Restaurant.

They ordered and spent the most wonderful evening no one could ever dream of. It was almost ten and they had to go back to school or they would be caught again. Harry ordered the check and the waiter brought a small black leather case. He opened it and saw a note inside.

Dear Mr. Potter,

Thanks very much for choosing our restaurant, I can't even start telling you how thrilled I was when I saw you and your lovely girlfriend enter.

This dinner is running on the house if you don't mind, but I would love it if you could leave me an autograph, for I couldn't be at the Café today because of work.

Thanks a million from,

Florence Gustavson

(owner)

Harry gaped at the letter for a long time and then took the parchment under it. He produced a quill and signed his name.

Thank you very much for dinner, it was certainly wonderful and I hope I can come back very soon.

Sincerely yours,

Harry J. Potter

When they were walking back to school, Harry was very quiet and finally Hermione couldn't stand it anymore. "What was that all about?" she blunted out.

"Huh?" Harry looked up, "Oh, well we just got away with a thirty two galleon meal for free," he said vaguely.

Her eyes widened. "How can that be?"

"Uhm… the owner is a big fan of mine and she gave us dinner as long as I gave her an autograph," he said and blushed a little.

Hermione frowned. "I see. And you were ok with that?"

He turned to her. "How could I not be? They gave us dinner for free! What was I supposed to tell her?"

"Gee, I dunno, maybe `No, thank you'?"

"That would've been stupid."

"It would've been the right thing to do!" she snapped.

"Look, let's just forget and not ruin the day… We still have a lot to do, don't you reckon? You still have to give me my present," he said and winked at her.

She sighed, defeated. Her wanting of Harry was definitely stronger than whatever hadn't been all right with what Harry had done today. Besides, it wasn't as if he'd hurt anyone, she assured herself.

June 1997 - Hogwarts

"What is wrong with wanting to take advantage of this curse? There must be something good to it and I'm using it for a fair reason, don't you reckon?"

"You are completely missing the point here, Harry! You can't go around showing your scar to everyone to get everything you want!"

"Ron seems ok with it…"

"You know what I mean…"

"No, I don't! I don't know why you are making such a fuss every time this happens!"

"Maybe because it's wrong?"

"Do I hurt anybody?"

"Yes, you hurt me because that's not the Harry I love."

"This is me, and it is all of me you're with!" he replied angry and confused at this.

"Yes, and that used to include a boyfriend that actually spends time with her girlfriend!"

"What are you talking about?"

"What do you mean- Harry, when was the last time we spent a whole day together? Fuck! When was the last time we had sex?!"

"Well, I've been busy! This is what I want, and most of it I do for things for us. If you can't understand it, then I don't know…" he trailed off angrily.

Hermione gaped and narrowed her eyes. "Oh right! You are too busy getting attention and presents from complete strangers and you accept them. You are too obsessed over what the Order is doing and keep sneaking out by yourself when me or Ron won't come with you. We used to be a team, you know? Hasn't it occurred to you that they might be keeping things from you for a reason?"

"That is so unfair!"

"How is it fair that I have to spend more time with my boyfriend's best mate because he's never around? How is it fair that whenever I need someone or something, I end up with him because you are never here when I need you?!"

"You could summon me! You do know this isn't just a diamond and silver necklace." Harry felt a tinge of jealousy, but knew it was stupid because Ron would never do something like that.

"I know what the necklace does, but that's not how it works, you're not my white lighter, you are supposed to be my boyfriend, you are supposed to be with me, not out there with strangers. I- I feel you don't love me anymore," she said with tears in her eyes.

Harry sagged and pulled her close. "Please don't you cry tonight, I still love you baby, I will always do," he held her tight.

Hermione sobbed a little in his chest and then relaxed. He pulled her face up and kissed her softly. "Understand this please. I feel good when people give me presents."

"Please, don't go so much to the extreme. I miss you," Hermione said softly.

"I won't," he said and kissed her again.

November 1997 - Hogwarts

She stormed to the boys' dorms to find only her red-headed friend there. She let out an exasperated sigh and shook her head, tears shining in her eyes.

Ron jumped and stood, holding her by the shoulders. "What's the matter Mione?" he asked concerned, but knew what was coming. He was so angry at Harry for making her cry. If she were hers, he would never make her cry, he assured himself.

"I- I can't believe he did it again. He promised he'd be there and I waited for an hour!"

"Harry just went to a meeting of the Order. He wanted me to go with him, but I really don't think I want to know. It seemed as if it were an important meeting judging by the way he ran off," Ron mused.

"Oh Ron!" she threw herself at him. "He's obsessed to find the Lestrange woman and Voldemort! Why does he have to be like that?" she sobbed.

Ron wanted to kiss her so bad right now, and comfort her, but his loyalty to his best friend was stronger and he was starting to think it would fail him any time now. He was sick of being patcher between the two. "You should understand him, he lost Sirius to her, Neville lost his parents to her. You-know-who killed Harry's parents and almost made Hagrid lose his mind… you know how he is."

"It's not just that, we've been fighting too much lately. And it's either because of those little sneaks of his or because he insists in using his name for anything-what happened to our Harry, Ron?" she said as she paced up and down the room.

"I couldn't give you an answer to that, honestly." He started following her, trying to calm her down.

"He's changed, he's not the one I fell for-."

"I know he's changed, but all we can do is-."

"He's never here, I don't even know if he's going out with someone else, and, and- I don't know if I can put up with it much longer! I do love him but-." She threw her arms in the air and then covered her face.

Ron flinched and hurried to her. This was it; his loyalty had gotten to a breaking point. "Hey, he would never do that," he said softly and cursed Harry for making her unhappy. He held her close and stroked her back.

After a few moments she looked up at him with wide brown eyes. "Ron, I will never get to thank you enough," she said in a small voice.

"I'm always here for you, beautiful," he said with a small smile.

They locked gazes for seconds and then she found herself standing in tiptoe and his freckled face inching closer. She closed her eyes and got lost in the moment, forgetting everything.

When the reality of Harry's best friend kissing her and she kissing him back, she forced herself away from him and pushed him. "Ron! How could you-?"

He looked speechless and then managed to focus his blue eyes on her. "I- but you kissed me back!"

"He's your best friend!"

"And he keeps hurting the woman I love!"

She was about to reply, when he said he loved her. She gaped at him for a split second and then looked away. "Ron, I love Harry. I'm sorry."

He reached out his hand and his shoulders slumped. He sighed, "I'm sorry Mione, please don't push me away. It won't happen again, I promise."

She looked at him and sighed again. "I'm sorry too," she said and walked out of the room, too bewildered to put together two thoughts and the implications of what she'd just done.

A/N: I changed the format for the time jumps and scene changes, tell me which one you like best. Thank you!

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